— 12 essential tips and steamy positions
Getting steamy in the tub may be trickier than on dry land, but that’s no reason to write it off.
by Rosie Saunders
Shower sex looks easy in the movies, but the reality can be a little bit different. Getting steamy in the tub may be trickier than on dry land, but that’s no reason to write it off. A little pre-shower prep goes a long way.
With that in mind, we asked Mia Sabat, sex therapist at sexual wellbeing audio app Emjoy, to share the best positions for comfortable shower sex, along with extra tips and advice for taking your bathroom escapades up a level:
Shower sex positions
While this article refers to sex between a woman or a person with a vagina, and a man or a person with a penis, shower sex certainly isn’t gender-exclusive – nor does it require two people.
There’s plenty of fun you can have in the bath or shower by yourself, says Sabat – try lathering your body in special scented soaps or gels, or bring a sex toy into the mix.
‘The sky is the limit when it comes to shower sex, so long as you prioritise stability.’
‘There are plenty of waterproof options to help make things really exciting,’ she says. ‘The soothing nature of water can also help you to relax and unwind, giving your mind the space it needs to really get into the mood while helping you to build a truly powerful orgasm.’
If you are sharing the suds with a partner, try one of the following positions to make shower sex as comfortable and enjoyable as possible:
1. Stand and deliver
- The receiver should turn away from their partner with their back to their face.
- Feet should be firmly planted on the floor, ideally on a non-slip bath mat for added safety and leverage.
- The receiver should bend at the waist until their head is pointing towards the ground , with their hands resting either on the wall in front of them or the side of the tub.
- The giver should hold the receiver’s hips while entering from behind.
Also known as standing doggy style, this position is exceptionally satisfying when it comes to stimulating the clitoris and G-spot, says Sabat.
2. The wraparound
- Stand facing each other, with one person leaning against the nearest wall for support.
- Make sure to angle the shower head away from your face and onto your body for this to work.
- Have the wall partner ‘wrap’ one leg around the other to pull them closer as they enter.
‘Not only does this position allow for over-the-top sensations and deeper penetration, but it enables you and your partner to be even more passionate and intimate, as you can kiss and caress one another while face-to-face,’ says Sabat. ‘A truly perfect way to make shower sex even steamier.’
3. On your knees
- The ‘giver’ can squat, kneel or take any other position that allows them to pleasure their partner.
- Make the room hot and steamy for this, to ensure the person on the giving end doesn’t get too cold.
‘The key to this position is making sure that whoever is receiving oral sex is standing, with the shower stream hitting their back, to shield the person who’s giving pleasure from any unwanted distractions,’ says Sabat.
4. The caboose
- Have the giver sit down on the shower floor with their hands behind them.
- The receiver should then sit on top.
‘This position means you’ll both be getting wet with the water coming from above,’ says Sabat. ‘Perfect for a partner that enjoys watching you when you’re on top.’
Shower sex tips
The sky is the limit when it comes to shower sex, so long as you prioritise stability, says Sabat. Before you begin, take precautions by using the right tools for the job – non-slip bath mats and lubricant (yep, lubricant) are key.
‘You might think water will suffice as a natural lubricant, but it actually has the opposite effect,’ Sabat says. ‘To ensure that penetration is comfortable throughout your steamy experience, use the correct lubricant for your situation.’
1. Set the mood
Foreplay is important – get stimulated before your switch the shower on. You could listen to literary or audio erotica, watch shower-based pornography, or experiment with ‘getting dirty before getting clean,’ says Sabat.
‘Swapping massages with scented oil, exploring each other’s messier fantasies, or experimenting with chocolate body paint can be great ways to work up to shower sex, especially as you’ll really enjoy washing each other off once you jump in,’ she says. ‘Feel free to go where your minds and bodies take you – the possibilities are endless.’
2. Plan ahead
When it comes to shower sex, you’re going for exciting – not dangerous, says Sabat. ‘Be sure you take safety precautions through bathroom accessories like handles, gripped bath mats, and waterproof sex toys to ensure that any liaisons you get into in the bathroom don’t end in a trip to the doctor,’ she says.
3. Take a stand
A foot stand, that is. It can help improve stability and increase the depth of penetration, Sabat says. ‘When you’re showering alone, don’t be afraid to test out potential positions to gauge stability,’ she explains. ‘Not only will this likely help to stimulate you both, but no one will be any the wiser, and you won’t have to worry about any slips or stumbles when you’re enjoying the real thing.’
4. Don’t slip and slide
If you’re using any form of barrier protection, put it on before entering the shower to make sure you’re as protected as possible. ‘There’s an increased risk of condom slippage in the shower, so make sure it’s a good fit before you start adding water to the equation,’ says Sabat. ‘Remember, water is not a replacement for lubricant. Make sure that you have some water or silicone-based lubricant on standby, just in case, and that it’s compatible with any condoms or sex toys that you’re using.’
5. Think outside the box
Sex doesn’t have to involve penetration. Think outside the box and engage with other forms of intimacy – be it mutual masturbation, self-pleasure, oral sex, or simple, spontaneous mutual exploration, says Sabat. ‘What matters is that you and your partner engage in whatever sexual experience feels stimulating and satisfying to the both of you by consensually pursuing your sexual desires in the moment,’ she says.
6. Don’t obsess over orgasms
‘If you find yourself thinking that all sexual encounters must result in climax to be a worthwhile experience, it’s time to change – especially within the context of shower sex,’ says Sabat. ‘Focusing on stimulating each other while learning and exploring one another’s thrilling pleasures are valid ways of creating and sharing intimacy. Just let the flow of water and blissful pleasures take over – you’re sure to connect with some of your favourite undiscovered sensations.
7. Use shower accessories
A world of pleasure exists beneath the shower tap, says Sabat. If you are a person with a vagina, and have a removable shower head, ‘experiment with different positions throughout the tub – lying on your back or stomach, or sitting on the side of the tub, can help you to reach places you’ve never accessed before,’ she says.
‘Alternatively, lie on your back and slide under the bath’s tap until you come into contact with the steady stream of water in a way that feels pleasurable to you, without entering your vagina,’ Sabat continues. ‘In either context, the steady stream of warm water is sure to stimulate your vulva and clitoris like no other.’
8. Don’t shy away from anal play
If you’ve always wanted to explore anal play, the shower can be one of the best places to put your worries at ease, says Sabat. ‘Next time you’re in the shower alone or with your partner and feel the urge to venture out of your comfort zone, get some silicone lube,’ she says. ‘Start by slowly massaging your lower back, caressing the outside of your anus, and move at a pace that makes you comfortable and excited.’
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