Hey sex fans!
We’re back with our very last word in sex toy reviews for 2009. This is WEEK 6 of our Holiday Gift Giving Guide; and we close out the year with a Toys for Gals feature.
This week we will hear from Review Crew members: Joy, Gina and your truly, Dr Dick.
First up is one of two Doc Johnson toys we have today.
Love Connection —— $24.33
This sweet little multi-speed vibe is actually two vibes in one. There are two different silicone attachments that you screw on to the hard plastic base. I’ve used other vibes that offered attachments, but I was disappointed to discover that I couldn’t count on the attachment staying in place during use. The Love Connection is different. The two attachments actually screw on to the handle, so there’s no chance the thing will come off when you’re using it.
But the best thing about this little wonder is that it’s waterproof. There’s nothing that satisfies like a vibe in the bath. There is a one touch fingertip control button on the base of the handle that allows you to cycle through the three speeds. This is not a powerhouse vibe, but you wouldn’t expect it to be, being such a cute little thing. But it gets the job done.
Next we see about the other Doc Johnson toy
Lucid Dream No. 14 —— $21.99
Here is a classic example of how a toy looks so amazing in the package, only to have it let you down outside of the package. Lucid Dream No. 14 has an amazing shape. It has a bulbous angled head on a gooseneck body. It’s a jelly material in a luscious tangerine color. And it’s transparent; so you can see the sizable vibe in the head. I was confident this was going to be a brilliant G-spot vibe for sure.
Taking it out of the minimal, but stylish package produced the first concern I had. It emanated a very unpleasant chemical smell. This off-gas was really off-putting. And the smell got on my hands just from taking it out of the package. ICK!
I quickly washed the Lucid Dream and my hands with soap and water. I had immediate misgivings about using this vibe on my body, but I though I’d better press on with my review. I figured I could always slip a condom on it if I was going to have it come in contact with skin.
The next problem I encountered was battery placement. Lucid Dream calls for 2 AA-batteries, which are not included in the package. That was a bummer, but I got over it. Figuring out how the batteries fit into the battery compartment was a puzzle. Nothing I saw on the vibe itself showed the battery placement technique. There were no instructions in the package either. I swear I tried the batteries every which way and thought; maybe this was a defective toy. Then as I was opening the battery compartment to switch out the batteries one last time; the thing sprang to life.
Apparently, you have to close the battery compartment just so; any deviation from that, even tightening the cap a tiny little bit rendered the toy useless. The batteries weren’t making contact with the terminals correctly.
A dial in the vibe’s base activates the multi-speed vibrator in the head of Lucid Dream. This is one of those rheostat things. Not a bad concept when executed correctly. Again, unfortunately, this is not one of those times. The dial is way to lose for it to be effective. In order for this to work, there should be some resistance in the dial as one moves it up or down. This dial had no such resistance.
I have to admit, the vibe was quiet, but it also wasn’t very powerful, even on the highest speed. After all the trouble I had this Lucid Dream I didn’t even bother to try and pleasure myself with it. You know, life is just too short for a bad vibe.
FULL REVIEW HERE
Finally, we reprise my review of an amazing product.
The Cone —— $129.00
Guess what, sex fans? I am the proud owner of my very own The Cone. And oh jeez, my life is never gonna be the same.
I am now the envy of all my friends — both the male and female variety — since the hot pink pyramid shaped package arrived on my doorstep. (Actually the hot pink pyramid shaped package arrived encased in a nondescript brown cardboard box, but you get the idea, right?)
I purposely left the shocking pink cone shaped object sitting nonchalantly on my desk for the past 10 days. Without fail it caught the eye of everyone who passed through Dr Dick’s office/salon/café/crash pad. “What the hell is that?” You’re kidding!” Really? “Get outta here!” “Oh My God, can I try it?” And so it went day after day.
I fond myself repeating the mantra — “It’s an innovative sex toy! – It’s pop art! – It’s my new BFF! — It’s three things in one!”
My hat is off to the developers of this unique unisex toy. You can tell right away that the folks who created this little wonder have a profound appreciation for sexual pleasure, as well as a joyful sense of playful fun. This kind of synergy can and apparently does turn the sex toy industry on its head. Bravo!
Ok, so what exactly is The Cone? Primarily, it is a hands-free battery-operated vibrator, don’t cha know. And that, sex fans, allows you to be pretty gal-darn creative in how you use the bugger. In fact, its unique design practically begs you to come up with clever new use or two every time you use it. I know of what I speak! I came up with one really good one. But I’m getting a little ahead of myself.
It has a sixteen-function 3000-rpm gold brush motor. It is both powerful and quiet. (Believe me, once you have at this thing, you will be making all the noise, not it.) It has a soft high-quality pink silicone skin. Its about seven inches in diameter at the base, five inches high, and weighs just over a pound. It has two push button controls. Simply put, there is nothing discreet about it, folks! Everything about it screams: “I’m here. I’m pink. Get used to it!
The Cone requires 3 “C” batteries. Unfortunately, the first set of batteries is not included in the package. I tell you this because I don’t want you to get all bummed out when you whip it out, for the first time, hoping to hop on for a ride only to discover you don’t have the proper batteries on hand.
Even though this isn’t an insertable device (That is, unless your hole looks like the Arc de Triomphe in Paris.), you’ll want to use a good personal lube to keep The Cone‘s silicone skin from chafing your naughty parts. Just make sure you use a non-silicone lube though, or you’ll ruin the blasted thing.
Like I said, The Cone has sixteen different vibrating programs — from mild to “Whoa Nelly! I suggest you take your time and cycle through the different vibe patterns to find the ones you like best. Here’s a tip: the on/off switch doubles as an ‘Instant Orgasm’ button, which revs the thing up to fever pitch in an instant. This is apparently for all those folks out there who are just too damned busy to cum like a normal person.
For the uninitiated, the pointy cone shape may be intimidating. But relax there’s no need to worry; The Cone’s peak is soft and spongy. It’s sorta the consistency of a very stiff dick. You can sit on this baby, lean on it, lie on it or plop it in your lap. You can use it alone, or with a partner. Just don’t be surprised if your partner tries to monopolize The Cone. If you have girl parts, The Cone is ideal for your pussy, clit and taint (perineum). If you have boy parts, The Cone is perfect for your cock, balls and taint. And everyone’s asshole will sing for joy when The Cone comes knockin’ at the back door.
The Cone‘s silicone skin is nonporous, which means bacteria cannot penetrate it. That makes it a breeze to clean. Just wipe it down with a mild soap and warm water after each use. To sterilize — remove the silicone skin from the unit and swish it in boiling water for a couple of minutes. Of course when you replace the skin, ya gotta realign it on the unit properly or you will not be able to find the operating buttons. But whatever you do, don’t immerse The Cone itself in water.
Ok, so The Cone is decidedly pricey. I’ll grant you that. But you know this thing is gonna last. And I’m a firm believer in buyin’ quality right from the get-go. In fact, if we consumers only patronized conscientious manufacturers of quality products, like The Cone; there’d be a lot less crap in the marketplace.
FULL REVIEW HERE
Hey sex fans,
It’s Product Review Friday; it’s Week 5 of our Holiday Gift Giving Guide; and we’re doin a special Toys for Boys thing today. Next Friday, our last installment of in this series, will feature some swell Toys for Gals.
This week we will hear from Review Crew members: Carlos, Ken and your truly, Dr Dick.
All guys jerk off; even (or especially) guys who say they don’t jerk off, jerk off. Now that we’ve put that behind us we can get on with today toy selection, because it has a theme — masturbation sleeves.
First up is another product from the good folks at Vibratex and Carlos has the lowdown.
Sidekick Tease Me Sleeve —— $14.43
I love to masturbate; I’ve been doing it since I was 11. I love to masturbate with my wife; I like to masturbate with other men. It’s about as safe a sex as you can have short of having no sex at all.
I’m pretty much a manual masturbator. I never saw the need to improve on my hands for pleasuring myself. But the thing about being a Review Crew member, we get exposed to all kinds of products we wouldn’t otherwise know about. Take for instance the Sidekick Tease Me Sleeve. I would have never guessed that I could enjoy masturbating even more than I used to by using a masturbation aid, like a sleeve.
The Sidekick Tease Me Sleeve is a simple enough product. It’s made of 100% Elastomer, which allows me to use any type of lube you want to. I’m partial to silicone lube, because it doesn’t break down like water-based lubes do during a long masturbation sessions. And since I don’t have to worry about using a condom when I’m having sex with myself, silicone-based lube works best for me.
When you see the Sidekick in its package you’re actually seeing the inside of the thing. It’s turned inside out in the package so you can see the dozens of nubs that will be massaging your penis when you use it. Obviously the Sidekick is easy to turn inside out, which is all-important when you want it’s time to clean up, but more about that in a minute.
The hole you insert you penis in is a decent size, so you don’t have to struggle inserting it. And since you’ll be adjusting the pressure around your penis with your hand, it’s pretty perfect. So I lubed up and slipped the Sidekick over the head of my penis. I’m uncut, so slipping it on also retracted my foreskin. Honestly, I was really surprised by the feel of the nubs on my penis, particularly the head. It was so strange to have that kind of sensation on my cock. But once I got used to the sensation, I was thinking; man, this is great.
The other end of the Sidekick is closed. That means as you stroke this up and down your penis you actually create a bit of a vacuum, which is also very nice. Besides the up and down movement you can also rotate the Sidekick around your penis. This creates a completely unique sensation, which almost tickles. I loved it!
There are two minor drawbacks, if you can call them that. Once the Sidekick is turned right-side out (the nubs are now on the inside where they belong) the outside has no texture at all. This creates a bit of a problem with lubed up hands. I found that it was sometimes difficult to get a good grip on the thing. The other issue is the size. It’s only 5.5” long. Now that will fit most of us, but if your bigger than that, this might be a bit of a problem.
You can cum right in the Sidekick, because it so easy to clean. Turn it inside out again, wash in warm soapy water and let it dry. I found that once it dried; it felt a little sticky. So I just dusted it with little bit of cornstarch.
FULL REVIEW HERE
Next we have a much more elaborate sleeve from The Adult Toy Shoppe folks.
Cyberskin Pocket Pussy —— $39.99
Here’s the way I look at it; if god wanted us to jack off he would have given us arms long enough to reach our meat. Oh wait, he did! What luck for us!
I generally jerk off a couple of times a day. This amazes my partner, Denise. She thinks I’m some kind of sex freak, but I don’t know. I beat off much less now than I did when I was a kid. Back then, in my teens, I could and would squeeze one off five or six times a day.
Until this assignment as part of the Review Crew, I had never used a masturbation sleeve. Sure, I’ve seen them around, but I thought to myself; why bother? Ok, I’ll admit to being more than a little curious, so I jumped at the opportunity to review the Cyberskin Pocket Pussy by Topco.
This is my first Cyberskin toy of any kind. This stuff rocks! It’s amazingly soft and warm; there’s a silkiness to it too. They claim that it feels like real human flesh, I wouldn’t go that far, but it is truly remarkable.
The Cyberskin Pocket Pussy is designed to look like a real pussy and it’s very realistic looking, let me tell you. This may be a turn-off to some, especially gay dudes. But other guys are gonna groove on this big time.
When I took it out of the package it had a greasy feel to it that kinda surprised me. I guess whatever they put on it, some kind of preservative or something, keeps it from drying out while on the store shelf. Anyhow, the Pocket Pussy once outside of its packaging is a floppy thing. And that was a bit of a problem trying to get started with it. The whole thing is a little over 8” long; the sleeve is 6” long; the pussy measures 2.5” thick by 3.5“ wide.
I generally use silicone lube when I jerk off, but I couldn’t use that with Cyberskin. Luckily, I had some water-based lube available.
The Pocket Pussy has a very tight “vag” opening, it’s pretty stretchy, but gettin my dick in there was a problem and the floppy sleeve didn’t help. However, once I got the hang of it, it was less of a bother. I confess; this feels fantastic on my cock. I can apply more pressure using my hand on the sleeve, but I didn’t really need to do that. It is a mighty tight hole, and I’m not all that big.
So there I was stroking away watching some porn on the computer and thinking this is totally awesome. Although, I kept thinking the thing needs something to steady the sleeve or tunnel area while fuckin it.
Once I popped a nut in the sleeve I pulled my dick out all satisfied. But while I was admiring my new friend; I noticed that my spooge and lube was dripping out the other end on to my chair. I had forgotten that the Pocket Pussy has an opening on the end that is supposed to make cleaning it easy.
So I quick grab the open end of the sleeve and squeeze it shut so that the rest of my joy juice doesn’t come out. I take it to the bathroom and start the clean up. This turned out to be a much bigger chore than I planned. Ya gotta work soap and water into the sleeve and then rinse it all out. Unfortunately, you can’t really turn the sleeve inside out, which would make cleaning easier.
Now that it’s clean, or as clean as I can get it; it needs to dry. I tried drying it off with a towel as the package recommends, but I got little bits of lint all over the thing. DAMN! After that, I decided to just let it air dry.
Once it was completely dry the Cyberskin felt really tacky. I looked at the instructions on the package again and it says: “Generously apply Renew to properly maintain your Cyberskin product.” But what the fuck is “Renew”?
FULL REVIEW HERE
Just to round off today’s theme I offer my review of another masturbation sleeve.
So sex fans, I suppose ya’ll all know that the Fleshlight has been around for several years now, right? Good, I figured you would’ve noticed. I mean a person can hardly visit a sex related site these days without seeing one of their fetching ads. I realize that I’m a Johnny-cum-lately with my review, but like my momma always used to say — “all good thing come to those who wait”.
Like you, I’ve seen the Fleshlight around for years. And because of that I convinced myself I knew everything there was to know about the device. After all, I visited their websites loads of times. I watched their beautifully produced and very sexy mini-movies (more times than I care to say). And I even interviewed a bunch of satisfied customers. I confess, even though I never actually held a Fleshlight in my hand, I imagined I knew everything there was to know about a Fleshlight. I mean hey, it’s not like I never used a masturbator before. How different could this one be?
Well, so much for baseless assumptions.
Imagine my surprise when my very own personal FleshJack Ice showed up on my doorstep. I discovered that just about everything I thought I knew about this marvel didn’t even come close to the real thing. Until I had one of my own to fondle and probe…if ya catch my drift, I was clueless. It’s true what they say; this is the granddaddy of male stimulators. But you really shouldn’t take my word for it.
My initial piece of advice to everyone in my audience is; don’t be a smug jerk like me. That’s right! If you’ve never had your grubby paws on, or your hot little boner in, an actual Fleshlight, you pretty much don’t know nuthin’ about a Fleshlight. Period!
The first thing that struck me about the Fleshlight is it’s way bigger and heavier than I imagined. I figured it would be the size of a regular flashlight. I was wrong. The plastic shell is a serious 10” in length. And by it’s self it’s fairly light. It’s the totally amazing Superskin™ insert that racks up the weigh. My Fleshlight weighs in at a hefty 1 pound, eight and a half ounces. And that, sex fans, is a handful, or two, for damn sure. More about this in a minute.
The Superskin™ insert is totally amazing. It begs to be touched and caressed. It is unlike any other texture I’ve experienced in a sex toy. And like I said, I’ve had an opportunity to test drive a bunch of masturbators and stimulation sleeves in my time. The Superskin™ is kinda like a jelly, but it’s so much more substantial. I know this is gonna sound trite, but it does feel flesh-like. And if you add some hot water to your Fleshlight, as I did, before you sink in your chub, well it’s pretty much the most amazing feeling you can have from something that simulates a human orifice.
And ya wanna talk marketing genius? All Fleshlight customers are invited to customize their unit before they buy. And that is where the fun begins. Since most guys are pretty particular about where they stick their joystick, Fleshlight has cleverly come up with several “orifice” options: pussy, mouth, asshole or “neutral” (apparently for those who can’t commit). The plastic case comes in silver, black or clear. There are optional insert colors too: pink, mocha or ice. And get this, you can even choose from among six different internal contours for the insert itself: Original, Super Tight, Ultra Tight, Speed Bump, Super Ribbed and Wonder Wave. If, with all these options, you can’t design the perfect Fleshlight for you, you’re just too damned fussy.
I want to draw your attention to one last feature before we take this puppy on a test drive. The plastic case, the thing that looks like a flashlight, has removable caps at both ends. The top cap covers the bulbous head of the insert and helps keeps it clean when it’s not in use. The end cap can be removed for easy cleaning. (The jizz-fanatics among us will appreciate this, because when a wank session is over, you can simply dribble out your spunk for some delicious DNA play.)
Like I suggested above you can also add hot water through the end cap for a warm, squishy jack. If you do add water, don’t over-fill the blasted thing. No more than three-quarter full is my suggestion. And this is best done in the shower or bath. Because, depending on the vigor of your stroke, things will get might wet, which just so happens to add to the fun. Just so you know, this was my favorite way to Fleshlight!
FULL REVIEW HERE
Hey sex fans,
Today I bring you the very last word in the Sex EDGE-U-cation podcast series for 2009. We will be back with a slew of other prominent educators, practitioners and advocates of unconventional sexual expressions the first Wednesday of the New Year. But in the meantime, we go out with a bang. The brilliant and oh so charming Andrea Zanin is back with us to conclude the chat we began last week.
You didn’t miss Part 1 of this insightful conversation, did you? If ya snooze ya lose! Actually, that’s not completely true, because all of my podcast are archived on my site. Use the search function to your right, type in Podcast #172 and Voilà. Just remember to include the #sign when you do your search.
Andrea and I discuss:
- A working definition of polyamory.
- Her poly life.
- The sociology behind the monogamous heterosexual, reproductive pair.
- Marriage and queer folk.
- Changing attitudes toward polyamory in the popular culture.
- The connection, if any, between poly and other nontraditional sexual expressions.
- Coming out as poly or kinky.
- The right to culturally competent healing and helping care.
BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!
Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.
Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.
DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!
Look for all my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.
Today’s Podcast is bought to you by: The Holiday Sale at Eden Fantasys.