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Name: Jen
Gender:
Age: 25
Location: Florida
I am a young and attractive female with a great personality and many friends, but when it comes to men… I just don’t get it. I date many guys, but I can’t seem to get a guy into a relationship. I wont have sex with a guy unless we’re a “couple”, but the men I date seem to be turned off by this fact and don’t stay in the picture for long. In the past, I would have sex with guys I dated, but it would always end as soon as a relationship was mentioned. Any tips on how to get a guy to stick around without having to put out?

Basically men are pigs, darling. They want what they want, when and how they want it. (And just for the record, you appear to be just like most men, right? You have a very strict notion about how things should be and you wanna have it just that way.)

Nowadays the men folk don’t think it’s necessary to commit to a relationship just to get laid. The marketplace, so to speak, is brimming over with less encumbered pussy.

Now, far be it from me to suggest that you change your behaviors or value system. But you might want to take a look at why you are using sex as a lure? Maybe you’re good in bed, but not great relationship material. Or it might be that you are simply fishing in the wrong hole, so to speak.

Try connecting with a good fundamentalist Christian boy or one of them fine Mormon missionaries that are always floating around in pairs. They’re generally cute as the dickens in their white shits and black ties. And they will probably have a similar outlook as you as to the proper place for sex.

However, you may also discover that men with more traditional values about sex also have very traditional notions about the place of women in a marriage. Ya know, like barefoot and pregnant. You may even find that one of these more traditional types will do you one better by insisting that there be no nookie till you convert and get married in the church or temple.

In other words, beware of what you wish for; you may actually get it!

Good luck

Name: Tessa
Gender: Female
Age: 33
Location: Sherman Oaks
My husband and I are taking our first tentative steps into the world of kink. Unfortunately, we really don’t know what we’re doing. Are there any good guides out there for the novice kinkster?

You betcha, darlin’! Let me call your attention to Dr Dick’s How To Video Library. Click on the Video On Demand tab in the header. This will take you to the library’s start page. Once inside you’ll find everything your little hearts could desire in terms of guides for the budding perv. In particular, I’d like to call your attention to the series put out by the ever popular, Nina Hartley.

Nina is one of the most recognized and respected people in the adult industry. She is as well known for her outspoken support of the industry as she is for her more than 600 adult titles. Nina established herself as one of the top porn stars of the 80’s. Her success continued strong in the 90’s when she did some of her best work. Today she uses her position as one of the world’s most popular adult stars to advocate sex education and sexual freedom among couples and singles.

Look for: Nina Hartley’s Guide To The Perfect OrgyNina Hartley’s Guide To Stripping For Your PartnerNina Hartley’s Guide To Sex For The Bi-Curious WomanNina Hartley’s Guide To Foot FunNina Hartley’s Guide To Strap-On SexNina Hartley’s Guide To SpankingNina Hartley’s Guide To Double PenetrationNina Hartley’s Guide to Sensual DominationNina Hartley’s Guide To Couples SexplorationNina Hartley’s Guide to Threesomes  and Nina Hartley’s Guide To Bondage Sex. Just to name a few.

These handy dandy guides demystifies the particular fetish, takes the time to explain why fetishes are alluring, and what to do when one is curious about how to play with that fetish. And the visuals…well they will tantalize and inspire.

If Missy Nina doesn’t cover the particular kink that you are looking for, just do a search for the particular fetish you’re curious about. You’ll find just about everything at Dr Dick’s How To Video Library. Try search terms like: bondage, discipline, role-play, tickling, tit play, costumes, cock and ball torture, fetish, cross-dressing, diaper and medical play. The list goes on and on.

And the best part of all of this is that you’ll be able to view these videos by the scene, or in their entirety. Heck, you can even download to own. And you do it all from the comfort and security of your own computer. Simply put there’s no better way to become a big fat pervert than indulging in Dr Dick’s How To Video Library.

Good luck

Sex EDGE-U-cation with bootbrush — Podcast #328 — 04/18/12


Hey sex fans, welcome back.

We’re back from spring break with a bang! I have an extra special twofer show in store for ya today. My very edgy guest is here as part of both The Erotic Mind and the Sex EDGE-U-cation series. That means that this program will take a look at the world of fetish sex, kink and alternative lifestyles. And because today’s guest is also an author of some deliciously perverted erotica, I will be picking his brain about what makes erotic artists tick, so to speak.

I have the pleasure of welcoming a man with a remarkably unique erotic voice. He goes by the moniker, bootbrush. His brand-spankin’ new book — Assimilation; Tales of Transformation and Surrender, was just published days ago. So we will be among the very first people to hear about it. And if that weren’t thrilling enough, bootbrush will read from his work. I pretty much can guarantee you that this will knock your socks off, sex fans.

bootbrush and I discuss:

  • His moniker and how he got it;
  • His new book — Assimilation; Tales of Transformation and Surrender;
  • The power and passion of rubber;
  • Transformation, becoming a puppy;
  • The growing puppy play scene;
  • The book’s dedication;
  • The men in his life — his lover and his Master/Handler;
  • His sense of play and its importance;
  • How he hit upon rubber as his fetish object.

For more of bootbrush visit his website HERE! Find him on Fetlife HERE! And follow him on Twitter HERE!

(Click on the book cover below to buy bootbrush’s new book.)

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for all my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Dr Dick’s Stockroom.

drdicksstockroom.jpg

If it’s not one thing, it’s another…

Name: Malcolm
Gender: Male
Age: 40
Location: Johannesburg
I’m in love with this guy who is as sweet as the day is long. He’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a partner. What makes him so charming is he’s only recently come out as gay. Before this he was married. He is not jaded like so many other guys I meet. But there’s a problem. He’s real vanilla. I guess that’s the down side of coming out of a heterosexual marriage at the age of 35. He’s happy as a clam fucking me a couple times a week. He thinks anal sex is really adventurous and sexually daring. I on the other hand, am suffocating in the boredom. I know, now I sound really jaded, but I can’t help it. It’s just that there’s so much more to sex than what we are doing. I want to introduce him to some kinky shit, but I’m afraid that I will scare him off. What the fuck should I do?

I absolutely adore messages that start out: “I’m so in love. He/she is everything I ever wanted, blah, blah, blah!” Because I know that only a few words later the other shoe is gonna drop, and drop hard. “But there’s a problem, blah, blah, blah!”

Of course there’s a problem. There is always a problem…even with Mr. or Ms. Perfect, or maybe because your honey is so freakin perfect. Take it from me, sexual dissatisfaction will upset even the most tranquil and rosy apple cart and send everyone into a tizzy. Allow me to share with you something I wrote about this very issue about ten years ago. I think you will find the advice as fresh as the day it was written.

So you’ve met the person of your dreams only you haven’t got around to telling your new honey your dirty little secret. The sweet thing hasn’t a clue that you’re itchin’ for some big time bondage. Or that you’d sell your soul to be dominated like the scum that you are. Or you’re salivating over that dildo you have tucked away in the attic, the one that could be mistaken for a floor lamp. Or you’re craving to be spanked till your shameless ass glows in the dark. Or you want to hump his/her feet like a dog and gobble up his/her toe jam. Or you have this nasty little thing about spike heels, frilly knickers and jungle red lipstick.

Never fear, Dr. Dick has heard it all a million times before. Some sorry pervert’s got it bad for white bread. Dear Dr. Dick, Help! I’m in love with the sweetest guy/gal in the word, but our sex life is all vanilla all the time. I’m bored shitless! I know how to liven things up, you see I have this fetish (you fill in the blank) but I don’t know how to tell him/her about it and I’m afraid s/he’ll freak if s/he finds out. What’s a perv to do?

Introducing your partner to your personal world of kink is tricky; the whole little love match could blow up in your face. But a life of pretense and sexual boredom isn’t the way to go either. Why not just stand tall like the disgusting depraved creature you are and brazenly proclaim your fetish to little Mary Sunshine. After all, unless your boyfriend or gal-pal is as dumb as a post s/he’s already figured out that your mutual sex life limps. Besides, there’s nothing more satisfying than corrupting an innocent. Who knows, s/he may have secrets of his/her own.

Here’s what I suggest. Casually direct the conversation to the amazing variety of human sexual expression. You could reassure your sweetie that just because some things are unfamiliar don’t make them bad. Tell him/her that you’ve been waiting for your relationship to mature so that you could share the intricacies of your desires with him/her. This can be one of those precious bonding moments that Oprah’s always talkin’ about. This might be a good time to view that special video you picked up in the kink section of the local porn emporium. Invite her/him to explore your fantasy with you. Tell the little flower that your love for him/her demands that you share the fullness of your sexuality with her/him. Then pick one turn-on for the two of you to experiment with — lingerie, toys, dominance and submission, role-playing, whatever.

Decide on a safe-word, an out of context word your partner could use if the experiment is heading in an uncomfortable direction. For example, if the dildo is too big or the lipstick is too red, s/he could say “pickles.” The safe-word, when uttered in the scenario, will let you know that you need to change direction or slow down without completely destroying the built up sexual energy.

If this initiation process doesn’t work Dr. Dick suggests that you cut your losses and dump the white bread. Go out and find yourself a kindred spirit, someone you won’t have to apologize to for being creative in your sex play.

Good luck

More SEX WISDOM With Mac McGregor — Podcast #314 — 12/21/11


Hello sex fans! Welcome back.

Happy Solstice everyone! Here we are at yet another change in the seasons. Depending on where you live, the winter or summer solstice is upon us. And regardless the relentless march of time; there’s something about the changing of the seasons that I find very comforting. Just think, before ya know it we will be welcoming the equinox. I love the predictability of it all

This show also marks the end of the 2011 edition of my podcasts. We’ll all be on holiday for the next couple of weeks, don’t cha know. Podcasts will resume on Monday, January 9th, 2012 with a brand spankin’ new Q&A show.

To see us to the door, today so to speak, I’m delighted to welcome back my friend, Mac McGregor. He is a transman, author, activist, gender and sex educator, world-class martial artist and Seattle City Commissioner. He returns for Part 2 of his appearance on this the SEX WISDOM series.

But wait; you didn’t miss Part 1 of our conversation, did you? Well not to worry if you did, because you will find it and all of my shows in the podcast archive right here on my site. All ya gotta do is use the site’s search function in the header, type in podcast #313 and PRESTO! But don’t forget to use the #sign when you do your search.

Mac and I discuss:

  • The binary myth;
  • Surprising sexual awakenings;
  • The new term “gender queer”;
  • The gender specificity of language;
  • The shift from transsexual to transgender;
  • A question of vanity;
  • The Ingersoll Gender Center;
  • Sex work in the trans community;
  • Activism and sex education;
  • The search for kink positive and sex positive healing and helping professionals.

Mac invites you to visit him on his site HERE! Find him on Facebook HERE and Twitter HERE!

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously, or just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s Podcast is bought to you by: DR DICK’S — HOW TO VIDEO LIBRARY.

drdickvod.jpg

Guess What, Honey? I’m A Kinky Old Perv!

And now, by popular demand, a reprint of an old favorite.

So you’ve met the person of your dreams only you haven’t got around to telling your new honey your dirty little secret. The sweet thing hasn’t a clue that you’re itchin’ for some big-time bondage. Or that you’d sell your soul to be dominated like the lowly little bitch that you are. Or you’re salivating over that dildo you have tucked away in the attic—you know, the one that could be mistaken for a floor lamp. Or you’re craving to be spanked til your shameless ass glows in the dark. Or you want to hump his/her feet like a dog and gobble up his/her toejam. Or you have this nasty little thing about spike heels, frilly knickers and jungle red lipstick.

Never fear—Dr. Dick has heard it all a million times before. Some sorry pervert’s got it bad for white bread.

Dear Dr. Dick,
Help! I’m in love with the sweetest guy/gal in the word, but our sex life is all vanilla all the time. I’m bored shitless! I know how to liven things up, you see I have this fetish (you fill in the blank) but I don’t know how to tell him/her about it and I’m afraid s/he’ll freak if s/he finds out. What’s a perv to do?

Introducing your partner to your personal world of kink can be a little tricky; the whole love match could blow up in your face. But a life of pretense and sexual boredom isn’t the way to go, either. Why not just stand tall like the filthy pervert you are and brazenly proclaim your fetish to Little Miss Mary Sunshine? After all, unless your boyfriend or gal-pal is as dumb as a post s/he’s already figured out that your mutual sex life walks with a pronounced limp (or perhaps is suffering from a case of the gout). Besides, there’s nothing more satisfying than corrupting an innocent. Who knows—s/he may have secrets of his/her own.

Case in point. Here’s part of an exchange I had with a young man from Omaha.

Dear Doc,
I’m 23, and I’ve been dating 30-year-old chick for nearly a year now. I come from a very conservative Christian upbringing and I love that she is more experienced than me. My girlfriend likes to tie me up. I’m a college gymnast so I have very defined muscles. They are a huge turn on for my girlfriend, which I guess explains why she likes to see me struggle against the rope. I get real turned on too when I’m tied up. Sometimes she teases my penis and testicles with a feather or a piece of leather, which drives me wild. I’m worried though, because I think this is gonna warp me somehow. Do you think this is perverted? Why is it so much fun?

Ahhh yeah, Jake, I do think it’s perverted. I think your girlfriend is a big fat pervert and I think you’re still just a teensy-weensy little pervert—but well on your way to Big Fat Perverthood (note: Big Fat Perverthood is not a clinical term; just something we toss around the office for fun), just like your girlfriend. And why is this bondage thing so much fun? It’s such a blast because it IS perverted, IS nasty and IS forbidden, silly! One can only guess what your fundamentalist Christian mom and dad would think about their star athlete son trussed up like a Thanksgiving turkey while a considerably older dominatrix punishes his family jewels. I fear this apple has fallen a great distance from the tree, right, Jake? I absolutely love it!

Okay, back to telling your partner about your kink. Here’s what I suggest. Casually direct the conversation to the amazing variety of human sexual expression. You could reassure your sweetie that just because some things are unfamiliar to her/him doesn’t make them bad. Tell him/her that you’ve been waiting for your relationship to mature so that you could share the intricacies of your desires with him/her. This can be one of those precious bonding moments that Oprah is always going on about.

This might be a good time to view that special video you picked up in the kink section of the local porn emporium. Invite her/him to explore your fantasy with you. Tell the little flower that your love for him/her demands that you share the fullness of your sexuality with her/him. Then pick one turn-on for the two of you to experiment with—lingerie, toys, dominance and submission, pee, role-playing—whatever your hearts desire.

Decide on a safe-word, an out-of-context word your partner can use if the experiment is heading in an uncomfortable direction. For example, if the dildo is too big or the lipstick is too red, s/he could say “pickles.” The safe-word, when uttered in the scenario, will let you know that you need to change direction or slow down without completely destroying the built-up sexual energy.

If this initiation process doesn’t work, Dr. Dick suggests that you cut your losses and dump the white bread. Go out and find yourself a kindred spirit, someone you won’t have to apologize to for being creative in your sex play. Because, as we all know, the key to fantastic sex is all about communicating – and if you can’t be honest about what you want, then it won’t be long until you’re looking around, wondering how the hell you got to a sex life full of furtive, 2 minute, missionary position encounters. And life is way too short for that crap.

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