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Livin’ it up, livin’ it up oh yeah!

Hey sex fans,

It’s that time of the week again; it’s Product Review Friday. Today’s toy comes to us by way of our favorite retailer — Adult Sex Toys .com.

Let’s check in with Dr Dick Review Crew member, Jada for this Friday’s show and tell.

Acuvibe Cordless Ebony —— $73.92

Jada
I have a fantastic toy to tell you about. Allow me to introduce you to the Acuvibe Cordless. This is workhorse wand type vibe that will knock your socks off with pleasure. Simply put, for those of us gals who need a lot of direct stimulation to get off, only a wand type vibe will do. For years and years I relied on my trusty Hitachi Magic Wand. And despite having loads of opportunities to test drive many other new-fangled vibes, nothing even came close to the sure-fire performance of the Hitachi.

Of course, there was one huge drawback to the Magic Wand; it had to be plugged in to a wall socket. So I was basically tethered to an outlet for my pleasure. I guess I didn’t mind that all that much, because it never stopped me from pleasuring myself when I felt the urge.

But now, I am tether-free, and oh what a difference it makes. I get the same powerful vibrations I used to enjoy with my trusty old Hitachi, only now I can pleasure myself when and where I like. That’s because the Acuvibe is cordless. No more fumbling around adjusting a power cord or finding I was at the end of my tether, just as my big O was cumin ‘round the corner.

And get this, the Acuvibe can run on DC power, while plugged in, or, when charged, it can go cordless. Basically, you get the best of both worlds. You’ll never, ever need batteries!

This Acuvibe is about as stylish and sleek as a wand-type vibe can get. It’s jet-black, or ebony, if you will. It has a slip-resistant coating on the handle shaft and up near the power button. This is an exceptionally resourceful design element. Because when I’m holding on to my Acuvibe, and it is a bulky handful; I don’t want it to slip out of my hands while it’s working its magic. This is especially true if my fingers are wet with lube or my own wetness.

And the Acuvibe is versatile. It is brilliant on a stiff neck or sore back. It works wonders on my feet too. My husband asked me to tell you that men will also enjoy the Acuvibe.

The Acuvibe can run for 45 minutes on a single charge. And while it is charging there’s a blue light in the base that lights up. There’s just the single power switch that turns the unit on and also changes from a high-level speed of 5700 vibrations per a minute, to a low-level speed of 4300 vibrations per a minute.

Clean up is relatively easy. Just be very careful not to get water (or lube) in the recharge port. That being said, you can wipe it down with a lint-free towel and mild soap and warm water. Or try a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution.

I hope I can find attachments for my Acuvibe. The attachment that I’ve been using with my trusty Hitachi doesn’t fit on the Acuvibe, because the Acuvibe has a smaller head then the Hitachi. If anyone knows where I could find such an animal, please let me know. Leave me a message in the comments section. I’ll be forever in your debt.
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

Keep It Clean

Hey sex fans!

It’s Product Review Friday and we have some clever items from Empire Labs to tell you about.  This is the second batch of their product reviews. You can see the first batch HERE!

Dr Dick Review Crew members Jada and Jack & Karen are today’s presenters.

Body Spa Vibrating Foam Sponge —— $ 19.95

Jada
How very delightful! That was the first thought that came to mind when I was handed the Body Spa Vibrating Foam Sponge. But, as sometimes happens, the concept doesn’t always live up to the expectation. So I decided to take a “wait and see” attitude before I got too emotionally involved with this product.

The sweet minimalist packaging is truly refreshing. It hits all the right notes. The Body Spa Vibrating Foam Sponge package is clean, tasteful and wouldn’t be out of place in even a high-end spa boutique. Inside the package is a teardrop shaped natural sponge about the size of my hand. It is featherweight, just as you would expect from a natural sponge. And hidden inside is a small but powerful bullet vibe.

I could feel the vibe when I scrunched the sponge and with a little fiddling I found the “on” button. I was running a bath for myself at the time and I caught myself in the mirror smiling a Cheshire Cat grin. Oh yes, I thought, this will do nicely.

The promotional blurb for the Body Spa Vibrating Foam Sponge reads in part: “You never knew getting clean could be so dirty! Leave it in your shower; this discreet sponge completely hides the vibrator inside. No need to “de-toy” before guests show up!” I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Once I was comfortably settled in my steamy and foamy bath I reached for the Body Spa Vibrating Foam Sponge. The vibrations in this thing are surprisingly strong and exceptionally quiet. As I rubbed myself with the soapy sponge the vibration made me tingle. I have other waterproof vibes that I use in my bath from time to time, but none of the others help me clean and exfoliate my skin while they pleasure me. I think I’m in heaven.
Full Review HERE

Tongue Vibe Dual Pack —— $34.95

Jack & Karen
Jack: “We have two different, but very similar vibes to tell you about today. And we’ll do them one at a time, if you don’t mind.”
Karen: “First up we have the Tongue Vibe Dual Pack. The rather garish and oversized plastic packaging contains a smaller, compact-sized plastic flip-top case that contains two Tongue Vibes already loaded with batteries (thank you very much!) and four extra batteries. Extra points for this thoughtful gesture, for sure.”
Jack: “The vibes are phthalate-free, latex-free and hypoallergenic, or so reads the package. However, I have to wonder since the little plastic bullet vibes are encased in a jelly material. But let’s give them the benefit of the doubt. Each vibe also has a finger/cock/tongue strap. Both vibes are ribbed and glow in the dark. How fun is that?”
Karen: “Each Tongue Vibe has two speeds. Neither speed will knock your socks off. And I found trying to adjust the speed control on such a tiny vibe to be a bit disconcerting. I would have much preferred a stronger single speed vibe.”
Jack: “Ya know what these things remind me of? Hearing aids! Everything about the package, vibes and batteries remind me of that. Which just goes to show you how discreet these little things are.”
Karen: “Since there are two vibes in the package, we each got one to play with. Jack got the blue one, because he’s a boy. I got the pink one, because I’m a girl.”
Jack: “I promptly broke mine. I know; I couldn’t believe it either. I think my big clumsy man fingers were too much for the delicate little speed control. Sorry!”
Karen: “I tried putting my vibe on my tongue using the strap like the picture on the package. It wasn’t particularly comfortable and it kept slipping off. Here’s another thing. I couldn’t get over the feeling that I could accidentally swallow the vibe and have it lodge in my throat. That disturbing thought was a real buzz kill. I realize there was little chance of that happening, because of the strap, but still. Also, having Jack’s penis in my mouth and the vibe was way too much.”
Full Review HERE

Finger Vibe Dual-Speed —— $9.95

Jack & Karen
Jack: “Let’s move on to the other vibe.”
Karen: “This is the Finger Vibe Dual-Speed. Happily it comes in a small package — a bubble on a card actually. It is already loaded with batteries. Again, we really appreciate the that thoughtfulness.”
Jack: “It is exactly the same blue vibe that comes with the Tongue Vibe Dual Pack. However, this vibe is encased in a nubbed jelly casing. I have the same reservations about it being phthalate-free as I did with the Tongue Vibe, but I’ll let that go for now. This vibe comes with a little finger strap. The vibe is ribbed and glow in the dark.”
Karen: “Like the Tongue Vibe, the Finger Vibe has two speeds. Neither speed will blow your mind. Adjusting the speed using the tiny control mechanism is a very delicate operation. Please be careful; it can easily break.”
Full Review HERE

ENJOY

Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

Hey sex fans,

It’s Product Review Friday; it’s Week 5 of our Holiday Gift Giving Guide; and we’re doin a special Toys for Boys thing today.  Next Friday, our last installment of in this series, will feature some swell Toys for Gals.

This week we will hear from Review Crew members: Carlos, Ken and your truly, Dr Dick.

All guys jerk off; even (or especially) guys who say they don’t jerk off, jerk off.  Now that we’ve put that behind us we can get on with today toy selection, because it has a theme — masturbation sleeves.

First up is another product from the good folks at Vibratex and Carlos has the lowdown.

Sidekick Tease Me Sleeve —— $14.43

Carlos
I love to masturbate; I’ve been doing it since I was 11.  I love to masturbate with my wife; I like to masturbate with other men.  It’s about as safe a sex as you can have short of having no sex at all.

I’m pretty much a manual masturbator.  I never saw the need to improve on my hands for pleasuring myself.  But the thing about being a Review Crew member, we get exposed to all kinds of products we wouldn’t otherwise know about.  Take for instance the Sidekick Tease Me Sleeve.  I would have never guessed that I could enjoy masturbating even more than I used to by using a masturbation aid, like a sleeve.

The Sidekick Tease Me Sleeve is a simple enough product.  It’s made of 100% Elastomer, which allows me to use any type of lube you want to.  I’m partial to silicone lube, because it doesn’t break down like water-based lubes do during a long masturbation sessions.  And since I don’t have to worry about using a condom when I’m having sex with myself, silicone-based lube works best for me.

When you see the Sidekick in its package you’re actually seeing the inside of the thing.  It’s VSI1turned inside out in the package so you can see the dozens of nubs that will be massaging your penis when you use it.  Obviously the Sidekick is easy to turn inside out, which is all-important when you want it’s time to clean up, but more about that in a minute.

The hole you insert you penis in is a decent size, so you don’t have to struggle inserting it.  And since you’ll be adjusting the pressure around your penis with your hand, it’s pretty perfect.  So I lubed up and slipped the Sidekick over the head of my penis.  I’m uncut, so slipping it on also retracted my foreskin.  Honestly, I was really surprised by the feel of the nubs on my penis, particularly the head.  It was so strange to have that kind of sensation on my cock.  But once I got used to the sensation, I was thinking; man, this is great.

The other end of the Sidekick is closed.  That means as you stroke this up and down your penis you actually create a bit of a vacuum, which is also very nice.  Besides the up and down movement you can also rotate the Sidekick around your penis.  This creates a completely unique sensation, which almost tickles.  I loved it!

There are two minor drawbacks, if you can call them that.  Once the Sidekick is turned right-side out (the nubs are now on the inside where they belong) the outside has no texture at all.  This creates a bit of a problem with lubed up hands.  I found that it was sometimes difficult to get a good grip on the thing.  The other issue is the size.  It’s only 5.5” long.  Now that will fit most of us, but if your bigger than that, this might be a bit of a problem.

You can cum right in the Sidekick, because it so easy to clean.  Turn it inside out again, wash in warm soapy water and let it dry.  I found that once it dried; it felt a little sticky.  So I just dusted it with little bit of cornstarch.
FULL REVIEW HERE

Next we have a much more elaborate sleeve from The Adult Toy Shoppe folks.

Cyberskin Pocket Pussy —— $39.99

Ken
Here’s the way I look at it; if god wanted us to jack off he would have given us arms long enough to reach our meat.  Oh wait, he did!  What luck for us!

I generally jerk off a couple of times a day.  This amazes my partner, Denise.  She thinks I’m some kind of sex freak, but I don’t know.  I beat off much less now than I did when I was a kid.  Back then, in my teens, I could and would squeeze one off five or six times a day.pocket-pussy-4-TOH25056

Until this assignment as part of the Review Crew, I had never used a masturbation sleeve.  Sure, I’ve seen them around, but I thought to myself; why bother?  Ok, I’ll admit to being more than a little curious, so I jumped at the opportunity to review the Cyberskin Pocket Pussy by Topco.

This is my first Cyberskin toy of any kind.  This stuff rocks!  It’s amazingly soft and warm; there’s a silkiness to it too.  They claim that it feels like real human flesh, I wouldn’t go that far, but it is truly remarkable.

The Cyberskin Pocket Pussy is designed to look like a real pussy and it’s very realistic looking, let me tell you.  This may be a turn-off to some, especially gay dudes.  But other guys are gonna groove on this big time.

When I took it out of the package it had a greasy feel to it that kinda surprised me.  I guess whatever they put on it, some kind of preservative or something, keeps it from drying out while on the store shelf.  Anyhow, the Pocket Pussy once outside of its packaging is a floppy thing.  And that was a bit of a problem trying to get started with it.  The whole thing is a little over 8” long; the sleeve is 6” long; the pussy measures 2.5” thick by 3.5“ wide.

I generally use silicone lube when I jerk off, but I couldn’t use that with Cyberskin.  Luckily, I had some water-based lube available.

The Pocket Pussy has a very tight “vag” opening, it’s pretty stretchy, but gettin my dick in there was a problem and the floppy sleeve didn’t help.  However, once I got the hang of it, it was less of a bother.  I confess; this feels fantastic on my cock.  I can apply more pressure using my hand on the sleeve, but I didn’t really need to do that.  It is a mighty tight hole, and I’m not all that big.

So there I was stroking away watching some porn on the computer and thinking this is totally awesome.  Although, I kept thinking the thing needs something to steady the sleeve or tunnel area while fuckin it.

Once I popped a nut in the sleeve I pulled my dick out all satisfied.  But while I was admiring my new friend; I noticed that my spooge and lube was dripping out the other end on to my chair.  I had forgotten that the Pocket Pussy has an opening on the end that is supposed to make cleaning it easy.

So I quick grab the open end of the sleeve and squeeze it shut so that the rest of my joy juice doesn’t come out.  I take it to the bathroom and start the clean up.  This turned out to be a much bigger chore than I planned.  Ya gotta work soap and water into the sleeve and then rinse it all out.  Unfortunately, you can’t really turn the sleeve inside out, which would make cleaning easier.

Now that it’s clean, or as clean as I can get it; it needs to dry.  I tried drying it off with a towel as the package recommends, but I got little bits of lint all over the thing.  DAMN!  After that, I decided to just let it air dry.

Once it was completely dry the Cyberskin felt really tacky.  I looked at the instructions on the package again and it says: “Generously apply Renew to properly maintain your Cyberskin product.”  But what the fuck is “Renew”?
FULL REVIEW HERE

Just to round off today’s theme I offer my review of another masturbation sleeve.

FleshJack Ice —— $69.95

Dr Dick
So sex fans, I suppose ya’ll all know that the Fleshlight has been around for several years now, right? Good, I figured you would’ve noticed. I mean a person can hardly visit a sex related site these days without seeing one of their fetching ads. I realize that I’m a Johnny-cum-lately with my review, but like my momma always used to say — “all good thing come to those who wait”.

Like you, I’ve seen the Fleshlight around for years.  And because of that I convinced myself I knewproduct_aajack_440.jpg everything there was to know about the device. After all, I visited their websites loads of times. I watched their beautifully produced and very sexy mini-movies (more times than I care to say). And I even interviewed a bunch of satisfied customers. I confess, even though I never actually held a Fleshlight in my hand, I imagined I knew everything there was to know about a Fleshlight. I mean hey, it’s not like I never used a masturbator before. How different could this one be?

Well, so much for baseless assumptions.

Imagine my surprise when my very own personal FleshJack Ice showed up on my doorstep. I discovered that just about everything I thought I knew about this marvel didn’t even come close to the real thing. Until I had one of my own to fondle and probe…if ya catch my drift, I was clueless. It’s true what they say; this is the granddaddy of male stimulators. But you really shouldn’t take my word for it.

My initial piece of advice to everyone in my audience is; don’t be a smug jerk like me. That’s right! If you’ve never had your grubby paws on, or your hot little boner in, an actual Fleshlight, you pretty much don’t know nuthin’ about a Fleshlight. Period!

The first thing that struck me about the Fleshlight is it’s way bigger and heavier than I imagined. I figured it would be the size of a regular flashlight. I was wrong. The plastic shell is a serious 10” in length. And by it’s self it’s fairly light. It’s the totally amazing Superskin™ insert that racks up the weigh. My Fleshlight weighs in at a hefty 1 pound, eight and a half ounces. And that, sex fans, is a handful, or two, for damn sure. More about this in a minute.

The Superskin™ insert is totally amazing. It begs to be touched and caressed. It is unlike any other texture I’ve experienced in a sex toy. And like I said, I’ve had an opportunity to test drive a bunch of masturbators and stimulation sleeves in my time. The Superskin™ is kinda like a jelly, but it’s so much more substantial. I know this is gonna sound trite, but it does feel flesh-like. And if you add some hot water to your Fleshlight, as I did, before you sink in your chub, well it’s pretty much the most amazing feeling you can have from something that simulates a human orifice.

And ya wanna talk marketing genius? All Fleshlight customers are invited to customize their unit before they buy. And that is where the fun begins. Since most guys are pretty particular about where they stick their joystick, Fleshlight has cleverly come up with several “orifice” options: pussy, mouth, asshole or “neutral” (apparently for those who can’t commit). The plastic case comes in silver, black or clear. There are optional insert colors too: pink, mocha or ice. And get this, you can even choose from among six different internal contours for the insert itself: Original, Super Tight, Ultra Tight, Speed Bump, Super Ribbed and Wonder Wave. If, with all these options, you can’t design the perfect Fleshlight for you, you’re just too damned fussy.

I want to draw your attention to one last feature before we take this puppy on a test drive. The plastic case, the thing that looks like a flashlight, has removable caps at both ends. The top cap covers the bulbous head of the insert and helps keeps it clean when it’s not in use. The end cap can be removed for easy cleaning. (The jizz-fanatics among us will appreciate this, because when a wank session is over, you can simply dribble out your spunk for some delicious DNA play.)

Like I suggested above you can also add hot water through the end cap for a warm, squishy jack. If you do add water, don’t over-fill the blasted thing. No more than three-quarter full is my suggestion. And this is best done in the shower or bath. Because, depending on the vigor of your stroke, things will get might wet, which just so happens to add to the fun. Just so you know, this was my favorite way to Fleshlight!
FULL REVIEW HERE

ENJOY

And Now For Something Completely Different!

Oh wait, this is just more of the same, but fun nonetheless.

Name: David
Gender:
Age: 26
Location: New Jersey
I once slipped and fell on a very hard surface and ever since I’ve had issues with my bladder and urination. Sometimes I get an added drip afterward and I know it’s not an STD/STI I’ve been checked. What do you think it may be…I’ve asked and no one seems to know.

A drip after what? After you pee? After you cum? Both?cum006.jpg

Have you ever tasted what drips out? A taste test will let you know if it’s cum or piss. Either way, it won’t harm you. If it’s viscous, it’s probably related to your ejaculate. If it’s not a little gooey it’s probably just urine. But then again, it could be an Invasion of the Body Snatchers.

Name: jen
Gender:
Age: 25
Location: florida
i am a young and attractive female with a great personality and many friends, but when it comes to men… i just dont get it. i date many guys, but i can’t seem to get a guy into a relationship. i wont have sex with a guy unless we’re a “couple”, but the men i date seem to be turned off by this fact and dont stay in the picture for long. In the past, i would have sex with guys i dated, but it would always end as soon as a relationship was mentioned. Any tips on how to get a guy to stick around without having to put out?

Basically men are pigs, darling. They want what they want, when they want it. Nowadays the men folk don’t think it’s necessary to commit to a relationship just tomormon_missionary2.jpg get laid. The marketplace, so to speak, is brimming over with less encumbered pussy.

I’m not suggesting that you change your behaviors or value system, but do you ever ask yourself why you use sex as a lure? Maybe you’re good in bed, but not such great relationship material. Or it might be that you are simply fishing in the wrong hole. Try connecting with a good Christian boy or one of them fine Mormon missionaries that are always floating around in pairs. They’re generally cute as the dickens in their white shits and black ties. And they probably have a similar outlook on the proper place for sex as you do . They may even do you one better by insisting that there be no nookie till you convert and get married in the temple.

wallet-porn.jpgName: oscar
Gender:
Age: 33
Location: dominican republic
i would like to what is the easies way to make a lesbain woman reach an orgasm

Give her a nice muff to dive into and then kindly step aside. She’ll figure out the rest.

Those lesbians are so damn clever!

Name: Justin
Gender:
Age: 18
Location: Edmonton
I’ve been interested recently in fingering my ass to stimulate my prostate. What are the best gloves to use for this?

Have you tried woolen mittens?

WTF, pup? What do you need gloves for? There’s nothing in your hole that’ll do you harm. If ya get a little caca on your fingers from all that rootin’ around in there; don’t worry. That’s why god created soap and water. And I do recommend that butt play always be followed with a thorough soapy clean up.

Hey, and don’t forget to trim your fingernails before you head in there.

Name: browniee
Gender:
Age: 26
Location: canada
is it normal or good at all 2 have a dick 7.5 inch long n 6.5 inch around? is it abnormal? n will all women enjoy de size?

LOL! Yeah, I’d say it was good, one might even say very good. Is it abnormal? You betcha! In as much as it is considerably larger than average. Will all women enjoy de size? Probably not! Some women enjoy de smaller ones. Some women enjoy de bigger ones. Some women enjoy none of de above…I think these particular women are called lesbians.

Name: Michael
Gender:
Age: 65
Location: Portland, OR
Was circumcised a year ago for medical reasons by urologist. Really nasty scar line; also turkey neck as skin was pulled up from scrotum. Would like a recirc, removal of frenulum and hopefully some relief of the turkey neck. Any reccomendations of somone who can do a functional and aesthetically pleasing job?

Nope, can’t say that I do.fren2.jpg

Is your dick so freakin’ ugly that you’d be willing to risk going under the knife yet again? Even though the last guy botched the job? “…relief of the turkey neck…? Are you suggesting it hurts you? Oh wait, you’re talking about cosmetic relief?

Tell me you misspoke when you said you want to have your frenulum removed. The frenulum is the connecting tissue at the underside of your dickhead. It is densely nerve-laden and a very erogenous part of the cock, dear. YIKES!

Name: David
Gender:
Age: 27
Location: cali
if guys like touching other guys, does it make them curious or bi or gay? it happens alot.

Guys touching other guys? It might just mean they like to play sports.

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INTER GENERATIONAL FUN!

A cluster of email arrived lately from folks in inter-generational relationships. They raise some very interesting issues. Check it out.

Dr. Dick, I’m a 20-year-old lesbian and have been involved in a relationship for a year and a half. She is also 23 years older than me. As much as we don’t want to admit it, our age difference is becoming a problem for us. We have had a difficult and stressful ride for the time we have been together. We are just at different places in our lives. Neither one of us truly wants to break it off; we have put far too much effort into this. I don’t doubt our deep feelings for each other, but is love enough to keep a relationship healthy? I would like to think so, but then of course I don’t have any prior experience. I am young and have many years and many possibilities in front of me. This doesn’t concern me, because more than anything I want this to work. What can we do? – Dena

Dear Dena,

The issues you present get right to the heart of some of the stickiest stuff of human relationships — sex, intimacy and love. Each one of these is different from the otherlesbian01.jpg and each satisfies (or frustrates) a specific need in each of us. The problem, of course, is that many of us jumble them all together and make a muddle of things. Let’s see if we can parse things out a bit.

You ask, “is loving someone enough to make a relationship work?” The short answer is, yes, absolutely. The rub comes with defining what that particular relationship will look like. Simply loving someone will NOT be enough to satisfy a need for sexual expression, nor will it satisfy every intimacy need.

That being said, if maintaining your relationship at all costs is your objective, I’d suggest that you consider making some kind of adjustment to your current relationship to allow you to experiment with satisfying your sexual and intimacy needs outside the relationship. Of course, this is often easier said than done.

If your girlfriend is mature enough, she’ll understand your needs and give you the permission you request. If not, you’ll have to do it on your own. You need to grow; so does your partner. Pretending that this issue will somehow disappear, just because you love one another, is foolish. Unattended, these needs will worm their way into every facet of your being together and they’ll destroy everything you currently have in place.

I always favor the up-front approach. Have a frank discussion with your partner. Work out some new, temporary parameters for your relationship. Check in frequently with one another. Take note of how each of you is adjusting to this fresh approach to problem solving. Assure her of her rightful place as your primary partner. All other relationships are merely satellite relationships that are meant to augment what is available on the home front. Of course, you’ll need to grant her the same latitude you seek for yourself. Honesty, communication and assurance will be your keys to success.

Good luck,

Doc, I am 72 years old and I live with a 38 year old young man. Ours is a celibate life but with lots of touch and love. We decided that sex between us could be destructive so we put that aside. We are free to make sexual liaisons outside the relationship, but they have been minimal. We enjoy each other so much without the tension of having to perform that we would like to share the idea with others. We have a freedom that others could cherish. Many have sex without love why not love without sex? I am happy for the first time in my life and suggest these kinds of alternatives in every forum I can. Thank you for your time. – Bill

Dear Bill,older01.jpg What a joy it was reading your e-mail.

You and I share the same mission. We’re both encouraging others to consider the array of different models of loving, intimacy and sex that are available.

Most of the mail I get is from people who, despite being intelligent and sophisticated in most other matters, have absolutely no creativity in terms of the relationships they form. Just about everyone wants to know how he/she can mimic the look and feel of the dominant heterosexual, sexually exclusive model. As if that were the only legitimate means of being together. Why are gay men and lesbians so eager to buy into a lifestyle that rarely works for straight people? Maybe the wisdom you speak of is that which only comes with age and life experience.

There is one thing I’d like to point out. You say, “Ours is a celibate life…” I think you mean to say that you and your partner live a sexually abstinent life together, correct? Celibacy means something very specific; it means not being heterosexually married. This is a common enough mistake, one that permeates the popular culture.

I applaud your determination to bring the “good news” of alternative models of loving, intimacy and sex to every forum you can. I’m doing the same. Good luck in your efforts. You have a kindred spirit in Dr. Dick.

Dr Dick, I’m currently in a long-term relationship with a man who’s 18 years older than I am. I’m 29. It seems that I want to have sex more often than he does. It may be the age difference between us. I have tried masturbation to relieve my need, but it does not work too well. Whenever I’m with him in bed, I feel like touching him and so on. What should I do? – I Need More

Dear INM,

Congratulations! You’ve discovered the joys of inter-generational relationships. And I see you’ve also discovered the challenges.The issue you present is a common one, even for people dating within their own ageolder_male2.jpg group. A disparity in terms of sexual needs often appears between individuals in a relationship. This can be an opportunity for some creative problem solving or it can destroy the whole damn thing.

Here’s my suggestion.

  • First, try to discover if the difference in need has to do with sex or with intimacy. They’re not the same things, ya know. Does your partner even know that you are withering on the vine? Give yourself permission to explore other options to satisfy your libido. Could you have a sexual playmate outside the relationship? Is a three-way possible? Spice things up with some role-playing or a new sex toy. It’s easy to lose interest in sex when the play is boring, repetitive and ho hum.
  • There are lots of sex manuals on the market, to be sure. You could consult one of them for ideas if you can’t tap into your own god-given creativity. Of course a less expensive, and I think a more fun way to do this is to visit your local sex emporium. Don’t have one in your town? Too embarrassed to darken the doorway if there is one in your town? Never fear there are loads of them online. Make a date with your partner to visit a store. Pick out something new and naughty for him/her. Let him/her do the same for you.
  • Remember that sex oughta be an adventure even for an old “married” couple like you. Take all the opportunities that present themselves to make magic happen. You’ll be saving more than your LTR.

Good Luck

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