Boners are everywhere. They happen all over the world millions of times a day; most men will experience more than 4,015 stiffies this year alone. But, despite the abundance of boners, few men know the facts.
How much do you really know about your wood? Wait, don’t answer that. To help you get more acquainted with your main vein’s hard life, here are 10 things you should know about your goo geyser!
1. Boners can break
Although many mammals have actual bones in their peens, human schlongs are boneless. But, that doesn’t mean they can’t break. Rough action can result in a “penile fracture,” and it’s more common that you might think. In the United States, approximately 200 men a year suffer from a broken penis, and it’s not pretty. You’ll hear a large crack, blood vessels explode — the whole thing turns into a big throbbing bruise and is out of order for weeks. It’s not pretty.
2. They have a mind of their own
Like your heart rate and blood pressure, your meat hammer is controlled by your autonomic nervous system. If you get turned on, the boner that follows is involuntary, which explains all the wood you had in freshmen shop class.
3. They can last a painfully long time
It’s called a priapism. It’s when your penis stays hard for more than four hours and refuses to go away. You can beat him until he blows his load, but that bad boy’s here to stay. It’s a very painful and serious condition. If you’re stiffy stays for too long, seek immediate medical attention.
4. Boners are bountiful
You probably have one right now. On average, you’ll have 11 erections a day — some happen while you’re awake, while others pop in at night.
5. There are different types of boners
Seriously! Most scientists agree that there are three types of boners.
- Psychogenic: Ignited by fantasies, like the ones you have at the gym.
- Reflexogenic: Produced by physical stimulation, like when you jerk.
- Nocturnal: Induced when’re fast a sleep dreaming about warm lips and tight holes.
6. Half your hard-on is hidden
Actually, half of your penis is hidden inside your body. Here’s how to find it, the next time you’re excited feel your perineum (aka your “taint”). That’s the hidden section of your dong. Pretty cool, huh?
7. Spanking the monkey makes him weaker
Calm down! We’re not saying you need to stop buffing your banana. In fact, it can reduce your risk of prostate cancer. But, some studies have shown that if you cut back on your alone time, your throbbin’ nob will throb even harder. You can always try prostate massages — they work famously.
8. Some medications murder boners
And, unfortunately, the fun meds are the boner killers. These meds include Adderall, antidepressants, diet pills, and antihistamines. So, if you can’t imagine life without your meds, you might have to say buh bye to your boner.
9. Blowing and going
One man was able to blow an astonishing six loads without losing his wood, and he did it in only 36 minutes. Wow. Just wow.
10. Boners need exercise
Ok, so we just told you not to choke the chicken, but your lil man does need exercise. Without regular stimulation your little man’s muscles will shrivel up and shrink. You could lose up to an inch in length. So, play with him often, just don’t over do it.
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