What even the most vanilla among us can learn from the BDSM community

by Natalie Benway “Sex is not what you do, it’s a place you go.” —Esther Perel Americans carry a lot of anxiety about having an exciting sex life. This anxiety inspires Cosmopolitan, Redbook and the like to publish a steady stream of articles flouting “100 ways to spice up your sex life!” and “The top …

7 Amazing Women Who Made It Easier For You To Have Sex

By Kasandra Brabaw Sunday, August 26, marked the 98th anniversary of the 19th Amendment, which officially granted women the right to vote. And as we celebrate Women’s Equality Day, which August 26th is known as now, we think about those incredible women who fought for our right to vote and won. Often, we also think …

Marriage and #MeToo

Behind the millions-loud movement, there’s a quiet fringe of women not comfortable posting the hashtag—because to out their perpetrator would be to out their husband. By Andrea Stanley After the half-hearted foreplay, but before the lousy sex—that’s when the argument happened. It was nearly midnight on a Tuesday and Jess T. was just getting home …

Men, like women, can have post-sex blues

By Cheryl Platzman Weinstock After sex, men can sometimes experience a myriad of confusing negative feelings, a phenomenon called post-coital dysphoria (PCD), which can interfere with relationships, researchers say. The research team analyzed responses from over 1,200 men to an anonymous international online survey that asked whether they had ever experienced symptoms of PCD, which …

Yes, we can.

And we can also change the way we talk about disability and sex By Henrietta Bollinger  There are major barriers for disabled people who want to pursue sex and relationships. They are real and deeply felt. Yet the stigmatising tone of public conversation makes me wary, writes Henrietta Bollinger “Um … advice? From me? Yes, …

What It’s Like to Reclaim Your Sex Life After Sexual Assault

Survivors share their stories. By Zahra Barnes When she was 16, Lindsay Marie Gibson was raped. After her assault, life continued, as it does. Years later, in college, she met the man who would become her husband. She fell in love. They got married. Life was good. Yet her assault from years before still wreaked …

10 questions you should ask your partner so your relationship can thrive

Questioning your expectations and compatibility is key, researchers claim By Sabrina Barr How do you know when it’s the right time to take a relationship that’s in its early stages to the next level? Asking the right questions could be the key to embarking on a more serious and meaningful relationship, according to a study …

Why do we have difficulty accepting the variety of gender expressions?

Isn’t it self-evident that gender would always be uniquely expressed in each person? By Allyson Jule I know we’ve all heard this stuff before: men and women and boys and girls are “different”: they think differently, they think about different things, and they interact with the world in different ways. But those are dangerous ideas. …

‘Compulsive sexual behaviour’ is a real mental disorder, says WHO, but might not be an addiction

Global health body not yet ready to acknowledge ‘sex addiction’, saying more research is needed The World Health Organisation has recognised “compulsive sexual behaviour” as a mental disorder, but said on Saturday it was unclear whether it was an addiction on a par with gambling or drug abuse.  The contentious term “sex addiction” has been …

We’re Queer And We’ve Been Here

Rediscovering Buddhism’s LGBT history of gay monks, homoerotic samurai, and gender-nonconforming practitioners and gods By Dr. Jay Michaelson It’s no secret that many LGBTQ people have found refuge in the dharma, and it’s easy to see why.  It helps us work with the wounds of homophobia, recognizing internalized self-hatred for the delusion and dukkha [suffering] …

Study: Even more Americans identify as something other than heterosexual

A new survey finds the number of people who identify as bisexual, pansexual or homosexual continues to rise By Bailey Vogt A United States study has found that more people than ever before identify as something other than heterosexual. The study by YouGov, a U.K.-based data analytics firm, found that one-third of 18 to 34-year …

The World Health Organization No Longer Classifies Being Transgender as a Mental Illness

New catalogue lists ‘gender incongruence’ under ‘conditions related to sexual health’ Transgender people, who identify as the opposite gender to the one they were born with, should no longer be considered mentally ill, according to a new UN categorisation. The World Health Organization issued a new catalogue Monday covering 55,000 diseases, injuries and causes of …