Disabled People Use Sex Toys, Too

— So Why Aren’t They More Accessible?

By Maggie Zhou

Sex is considered one of our baseline human needs. In Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, some experts place it right at the base of the pyramid with other physiological necessities like breathing, food, water and sleep. Other people consider it a social need, akin to friendships, community and intimacy.

For many allosexual people, sexual pleasure is an essential part of life. So why are disabled people so often left out of the conversation?

4.4 million Australians live with disability. While tools that help people eat, wash and walk are widely understood and accepted, there’s a long way to go to rid the taboo of adaptive technology for self-pleasure and sex.

Your life has benefited from adaptive technology — whether you realise it or not, whether you’re disabled or not. Also known as assistive technology, we’re talking about devices specifically designed to aid disabled people with everyday living. Electric toothbrushes, shoe horns and removable shower heads — these household items began as adaptive tech.

There’s a growing cohort of disabled Australians, occupational therapists and entrepreneurs dedicated to making sex more accessible. “A healthy sex life, whether solo or with a partner, is vital for people with disabilities, just as it is for anyone,” Dr Sakshi Tickoo, occupational therapist and author of SexCare, tells Refinery29 Australia. “Exercising control over [your] body through sexual expression can be empowering. It allows [you] to assert autonomy and make personal choices about [your] body and desires.”


These conversations aren’t limited to disabled people; having frank, inclusive and open discussions about sex benefits everyone.

These conversations aren’t limited to disabled people; having frank, inclusive and open discussions about sex benefits everyone. “Sexual scripts often teach us that intimacy and sex must look a certain way, bodies must work in a certain way, and the experience must end in a certain way. This ‘certain way’ is limiting for all bodies… Pleasure is the measure,” sex therapist Selina Nguyen and sexology masters student Niamh Mannion echoed on Instagram.

“Sex toys, especially those designed with accessibility in mind, can compensate for various physical limitations by providing an alternative means of achieving sexual pleasure and satisfaction,” Dr Tickoo says.

Robert Duff-Silsby is the co-founder of Perth-based sex toy brand, Luddi. In 2021, at the disability service provider he worked at, a conversation about a physiotherapist’s client struggling with unmet sexual needs spurred on the creation of their own adaptive sex toy, the Ziggy. The NDIS-friendly toy is touted as an “inclusive vibrator for all genders, sexualities, ages and abilities”

“Disabilities vary so much that it’s really impossible to make one product that meets everyone’s need,” he tells us, sharing that Luddi designed the product to try meet as many people’s needs as possible. What eventuated was a product that’s easy to pick up and turn on and off, uncomplicated to use, and features Braille on the packaging.

“I think the way that we look at it is maybe a little controversial, but we don’t think assistive technology should exist as a category,” Duff-Silsby says. “There should be products that exist for everyone that ha[ve] certain accessibility features built into [them]… If you have multiple products with an extra piece of knowledge, it allows [more] part[s] of the population to access the product. If you have lots of these products, you’ll meet a whole population’s needs, in theory.”

One in six Australians are disabled, and becoming disabled is something all people can experience. “Our physical capabilities may change as we age or encounter various health challenges… The relevance of sex toys, not just for individuals currently living with disabilities but for the broader population, [serves] as a proactive approach in maintaining a healthy and satisfying sexual life through these changes.”

23-year-old Sydneysider Ariel* has idiopathic neurological disorder and has always had a “complex… relationship with self-pleasure”. “I often feel disenfranchised from able-bodied communities who discuss sex toys and sex in general,” she tells us. “My disability prevented me from engaging in a lot of social situations as a young person, and as a result, I feel I missed out on times to explore my sexuality and relationships. I hold a lot of shame about that.”


“Sex toys have brought me joy and accessibility and I hope people acknowledge the importance of them for our community!”

Over time, she’s become more comfortable exploring her relationship with sexual pleasure. This openness has allowed her to experience pleasure from her small and portable battery-powered bullet vibrator. “Sex toys have brought me joy and accessibility and I hope people acknowledge the importance of them for our community!”

Despite all this, she tells us about the stigmas she still faces. “I do think autism is often infantilised and therefore embracing one’s sensuality and sexuality as an autistic person isn’t as widely accepted by neurotypical society… There is often less autonomy granted to physically disabled people and it’s often unexpected to hear of or see sex-positive media with disabled folks included.”

Sex in itself is still generally considered a taboo in mainstream spaces. This is only compounded for disabled people. Imagining a future where we respect the varied abilities and preferences in the bedroom is utopic for all of us. A sexual health model that’s inclusive of people’s varying needs and desires respects pleasure and anatomy. And that’s hot.

*Names have been changed to protect identities.

Complete Article HERE!

New study untangles the links between pornography genres and sexual wellbeing in young adults

By Eric W. Dolan

Recent research published in The Journal of Sex Research has uncovered intriguing findings about how different types of pornographic content are related to sexual satisfaction and function among young adults. The findings indicate that while pornography themed around passion and romance is linked to higher sexual satisfaction, content focusing on power, control, and rough sex tends to be linked to lower sexual satisfaction and function, particularly among cisgender men.

Pornography is widely accessible and forms a significant part of many adults’ sexual experiences. While previous research has shown mixed outcomes on sexual satisfaction and function, these studies primarily focused on the frequency of pornography use without considering the nature of the content. The vast array of sexual themes in pornography, ranging from romantic and consenting acts to more aggressive or non-consensual scenarios, prompted researchers to explore how these different themes potentially affect users.

“Pornography use is often blamed in popular media to explain sexual dissatisfactions and sexual dysfunctions. However, results related to the relationship between pornography use and sexuality are mixed,” explained study author Marie-Chloé Nolin, a PhD student at Université du Québec à Trois-Rivières and member of Marie-Pier Vaillancourt-Morel’s SAIL Lab.

“As a diversity of pornographic contents is available on pornographic websites and experts in the field have suggested to examine the context in which the pornography is used to shed light on the mixed findings, we chose to examine the associations between the frequency of use of different contents and sexuality.”

Researchers conducted the study using a convenience sample of 827 young adults, varying in age from 17 to 30 years, who were recruited through university email lists, advertisements on Kijiji (a popular classified advertising platform), and targeted social media campaigns on platforms like Facebook and Instagram.

Once recruited, participants were directed to complete an online survey. This survey was part of a larger longitudinal study focusing on digital technologies and intimate relationships among adolescents and young adults. The survey was designed to be comprehensive, including sections that assessed sociodemographic characteristics, detailed pornography use habits, sexual satisfaction, and sexual function.

The frequency of masturbation was also recorded and used as a control variable in the analysis to differentiate the effects of pornography use from other sexual behaviors that might influence sexual satisfaction and function.

The researchers found that men were more likely to view almost all types of content more frequently than women, except for power, control, and rough sex pornography, which saw no significant difference in consumption rates between genders. This indicates a potential shift in the traditional understanding of gender preferences for pornography, suggesting that aggressive content is not more appealing to men than women as often presumed.

Passion and romance pornography was highly popular, with the highest usage reported by cisgender men (83.06%) and gender-/sex-diverse individuals (83.33%), and a significant prevalence among cisgender women (56.97%). This type of content typically involves scenarios that depict intimacy, mutual pleasure, and emotional connections, which might resonate more with positive sexual values and expectations.

Multipartner sex pornography also showed substantial usage across genders, particularly among cisgender men (78.07%) and gender-/sex-diverse individuals (75.00%), and less so among cisgender women (45.41%). Taboo and forbidden sex content was most favored by cisgender men (84.05%), showing high engagement from gender-/sex-diverse individuals (75.00%) and considerably lower usage by cisgender women (31.47%).

Power, control, and rough sex pornography had moderate popularity, with the highest usage among gender-/sex-diverse individuals (62.50%), followed by cisgender men (39.20%) and cisgender women (29.28%).

Importantly, the researcher found a positive association between the consumption of passion and romance-themed pornography and higher sexual satisfaction across all participants, regardless of gender. Individuals who frequently watch this type of pornography might experience an enhancement in their sexual satisfaction, possibly because these themes align better with real-life sexual experiences that are consensual and pleasure-focused.

In contrast, pornography that included themes of power, control, and rough sex was associated with lower sexual satisfaction. Such content often involves dominance, aggression, and sometimes non-consensual acts, which might lead to unrealistic or harmful sexual expectations. These themes could also induce feelings of guilt or discomfort due to a mismatch between the depicted acts and personal moral values or real-life sexual preferences.

Regarding sexual function, the researchers found a significant negative relationship with power, control, and rough sex pornography among cisgender men. This finding suggests that viewing aggressive or coercive sexual content could potentially distort men’s sexual expectations or desensitize their emotional response to normal sexual activities, leading to difficulties in achieving sexual arousal or satisfaction during partnered sex.

Passion and romance pornography, on the other hand, was unrelated to sexual function, which might suggest that the content that aligns more closely with real-life sexual behavior does not negatively influence sexual health.

“The use of passion and romance pornography (i.e., romantic place, romantic sex or couple having sex, massage, and mutual masturbation) was associated with higher sexual satisfaction, while the use of power, control and rough sex pornography (i.e., sadomasochism, bondage and domination, spanking, and rape/sexual assault) was associated with lower sexual satisfaction,” Nolin told PsyPost.

“Cisgender men’s use of power, control and rough sex pornography was associated with lower sexual function (i.e., more difficulties related to sexual desire, arousal, and orgasm). These results could be explained by how using specific pornographic contents creates sexual expectations that can vary in their levels of realism or of how actually satisfying they can be when recreated with a partner.”

But the study, like all research, includes some caveats. “Given the correlational design, no causal inference can be made,” Nolin noted. “For example, this means that we do not know if people who use more power, control and rough sex pornography are less sexually satisfied because of their pornography use or if people who are less satisfied turn to this type of content to cope with their dissatisfactions.”

Additionally, the sample, though diverse, primarily consisted of young adults and may not represent older age groups or varying cultural backgrounds.

Future studies should look to longitudinal designs to better understand the directionality of these relationships and expand the diversity of participants. Researchers could also explore other contextual factors that influence the relationship between pornography use and sexual outcomes, such as relationship status, the presence of a sexual partner during consumption, and individual psychological traits.

The study, “Associations Between Contents of Pornography and Sexual Satisfaction and Function Among Young Adults,” was authored by Marie-Chloé Nolin, Marie-Ève Daspe, Beáta Bőthe, Audrey Brassard, Christian Joyal, and Marie-Pier Vaillancourt-Morel.

Complete Article HERE!

How to use lube during both partnered and solo play for next-level (!) sex

— Let’s get wet ‘n wild.

By and

When you’re moving from foreplay to the penetration portion of sex, a little bit of friction is a welcome addition. But too much of it can easily turn ‘ooh’ into ‘ouch,’ leaving that area dry and irritated, to say the least. That’s where lube comes in clutch. However, no one ~really~ teaches you how to use it, and it’s not always a topic covered in sex ed. So, you might be missing out on some of the added perks it can offer your sex life.

ICYDK, lube, or lubricant, is any kind of gel used for sexual activity, says Rachel Needle, PsyD, a certified sex therapist and intimacy expert in Florida. ‘It can help essentially reduce friction,’ she says, which means it can decrease pain and discomfort with vaginal dryness, help condoms stay on, and straight-up make sex feel better.

Sounds pretty great, right? More amazing news: There’s really no wrong way to use lube. ‘Like all things sexual, use lube in whatever way feels good for you,’ says Jess O’Reilly, PhD, a Toronto-based sexologist and host of the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. If you focus on your own pleasure, using it can become second nature, she says.

Ready to get lubed up? Ahead, check out your guide to all things lube, including all the types and how to apply it, according to experts.

Which type of lube should I buy?

Not all lubes are created equal, and the right one for you depends a lot on your personal preferences and needs. ‘There are many types of lube and often, the use can help determine which ones are best for that person,’ says Jessica Shepherd, MD, founder of Sanctum Med + Wellness.

One thing to note: Certain kinds of lubricants can have harmful effects on vaginal and sperm health if you’re using it in the vaginal canal due to the pH levels interacting, Shepherd says. Because the vaginal canal has a pH range of 3.8 to 4.5, you’ll want to use a lubricant with a pH of seven or below—otherwise, the vaginal pH will become imbalanced, increasing the risk of infections, discomfort, and transmission of STIs, she adds. (Some lubes include the pH on their packaging, but otherwise, you can search for lubes online that actively promote their pH.)

Here’s a breakdown of your options:

Water-based Lube

The first, most prominent ingredient in these lubes is going to be water (go figure).
Pros:

  • For one thing, ‘they are less sticky,’ says Dr. Shepherd.
  • Plus, in general, water-based lubes are pretty versatile—they can be used with silicone toys and latex condoms.

Cons:

  • They don’t stay on your skin as long as other types like silicone or oil-based lubes, she adds. So, you may need to reapply if you’re gearing up for a marathon in bed.

Oil-based Lube

Oil-based lubes are known for their staying power, but come with a couple of cons as well.>
Pro:

  • They last a long time, so they’re great to use for lengthier sexy time seshes.

Cons:

  • The oil may leave a coating on the rectum or vagina that can increase the risk of urinary or vaginal infections, Dr. Shepherd says. (Not everyone has this issue, though.)
  • They should never be used with latex condoms or latex products. ‘That will disintegrate the latex,’ Dr. Shepherd says.

Silicone-based Lube

Silicone-based lubes last longer than other lubes, but you have to be *very* careful about how you use them.

Pro:

  • They stay on for a long time.

Cons:

  • They can be harder to wash off than other types of lube, Dr. Shepherd says.
  • They’re not compatible with silicone sex toys, as it can break down the material, Dr. Shepherd explains.

Natural Lube

‘Natural lubes usually consist of ingredients that can range from homemade to store-bought and have the lowest amounts of ingredients,’ Dr. Shepherd says.
Pro:

  • Natural lubes don’t contain chemicals, additives, or synthetic ingredients that can be irritants, particularly to people with sensitive skin.

Con:

  • The term ‘natural’ isn’t regulated—you don’t need any type of certification to call a lube that—so it can be a bit misleading sometimes. So, if you’re looking for a store-bought ‘natural’ lube (rather than something like coconut oil), look for the words ‘organic’ and ‘natural’ on the label because ‘that means 90 percent of the ingredients are from the Earth,’ Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, PhD, a professor of relational and sexual communication at California State University, Fullerton, told WH.
  • They’re not great to use with condoms, just because some ingredients might break down the material, Suwinyattichaiporn previously told WH.

How to apply lube

There are tons of different ways to use lube, through manual sex, oral sex, and masturbation, for instance. Just squeeze a few drops of lube into your hand and try spreading it on the vagina, penis, or anus, and then add more if you need it, Needle says. A few tips to get you started:

  • Experiment with the amount of lube you need. ‘Some people think the more lube, the better, but really that’s not the case,’ Needle says. So, play around with the lube bottle, seeing how much comes out, and err on the conservative side at first—you can always add more later. The amount you need will depend on the kind of lube you’re using—for instance, water-based lubes don’t last as long, so you might apply more of that than you would if you were using an oil-based lube.
  • Apply it on the right areas. Depending on what you’re about to do, you’ll want to make sure the affected areas are all lubed up, Needle says. So, if you’re having penetrative vaginal intercourse, put some in the vagina (internally) and/or on the penis. As long as the lube has a pH of seven or below, it should be safe to use in the vaginal canal, Shepherd adds.
  • Communication is always key. Hopefully, you communicate about sex with your partner(s) before you engage in sexual activity, but either way, make sure all parties are comfortable with using lube, Needle says. Then, when you’re in the moment, communicate about how much to apply, and if you need more once you’re engaging in an act.

Manual sex (fingering, hand jobs, etc.)

Use it for an epic hand job. ‘Lube is everything when it comes to hand jobs,’ O’Reilly says. Try smearing a few drops on your hands or putting some on your partner’s penis before you dive in. ‘Anything you can do with your mouth, you can do with your hands as long as you use lube—and your hands are more flexible and dexterous,’ O’Reilly says. She recommends interlacing your lubed-up fingers and going for it.

Or, take fingering your partner up a notch. Try this pro tip from O’Reilly: Lube up your fingers, and cross them, like you’re making an ‘I swear’ motion. Then, slide them into your partner’s vagina, while gently rotating them. You can use your thumb to work your partner’s clitoris while you’re at it.

Oral sex

Apply lube to level up a blow job. It’s highly unlikely your partner has ever experienced this sexy hack before. Use your tongue to cover your lower teeth and wrap your top lip around your upper teeth. ‘Add lube to your upper lip as you clamp them between your teeth,’ O’Reilly says.

Additionally, gently massaging your partner’s balls (if they have them) during a blow job can help max out the experience. O’Reilly’s advice: Add a few drops of lube to your hands and then play with their balls or perineum while you give your partner a blow job.

While flavoured lubes are essentially designed to be used during oral sex, not all expets advise using them. ‘The vulvar and vaginal tissue is the most sensitive tissue in the body, and easily can be irritated,’ Mary Jane Minkin, MD, an OB-GYN with the Yale School of Medicine, told WH. That’s why she generally recommends avoiding products with perfumes and dyes for that area.

Penetrative sex

Of course lube can be used during penetrative vaginal or anal intercourse. ‘Use lube for more pleasure and less friction,’ O’Reilly says. She suggests applying lube right to your vulva using your fingers, or, if you want to get the party started right away, having your partner apply it by using their lips.

But lube can also help make backdoor penetration more comfortable, O’Reilly says. In fact, since you don’t have natural lubrication there, it’s kind of essential. She recommends using silicone lube for anal activities, unless you’re using silicone toys, strap-ons, or anal beads. It can also be an added bonus to keep things lubricated when you’re rimming your partner.

You can even drip a little inside a condom. A big complaint with condoms is that they can take some of the pleasurable feeling out of sex, but O’Reilly says that adding a little lube inside can do the opposite. ‘A drop or two of lube in the tip of the condom can heighten sensation,’ she says.

Masturbation

O’Reilly recommends using lube to try out different sensations for what she calls ‘mindful’ masturbation. ‘Slow down, release your grip, and breathe deeply as you focus on the sensations in your body as opposed to focusing on getting to orgasm,’ she says. (Sounds like a plan!)

Extracurricular activities

There’s plenty you can do here when it comes to sex toys. ‘You can roll a lubed-up bullet vibrator over your skin or across the vulva,’ O’Reilly says. Another trick: Sweep a vibe (with lube) over the perineum during oral or penetrative sex on your partner.

O’Reilly also recommends taking a flat-tip vibe, covering it in lube, and gently tracing it around your partner’s balls. You can even breathe warm air gently over the wet path you’ve created.

Or, try lube in the shower. Adding a few drops of lube to the base of your vagina or your toys before hitting the shower, O’Reilly recommends. Why? Water is notorious for washing away your own natural juices, and that can lead to some not-so-comfortable friction.

Lastly, you can dole out a sensual massage. While you can do it on your partner’s back, O’Reilly says a thigh massage is really the way to ramp things up during foreplay. ‘Use lube to trace figure eights over their thighs,’ she says. ‘Or use it to massage their inner legs before going down on them.’

Lube ingredients to avoid

The vaginal area is super sensitive to anything you put down there. ‘Be careful with anything that you’re putting in the vagina—it can really mess up the pH,’ says Needle. ‘It can cause yeast and lead to infections.’

So, a friendly reminder that just because an ingredient is included in a lube doesn’t mean it’s safe to be used down there. Here are a few ingredients to avoid when you’re shopping for lube:

  • Glycerin: A sugar alcohol, this component has been linked to yeast infections, Needle says. You always want to avoid putting sugars into the vagina because it can mess up the pH, she adds.
  • Parabens: These are additives that have been linked to cancer, Needle says. A 2022 study specifically connects parabens to breast cancer.
  • Propylene Glycol: This ingredient has been known to disrupt the vaginal barrier, which is associated with a risk of bacterial vaginosis, according to 2018 research.
  • Chlorhexidine Gluconate: It can change the bacteria in your vagina and throw off its balance, which can be irritating and lead to infections, Needle says.
  • Nonoxynol-9: It’s an ingredient with spermicidal properties that can kill both good and bad bacteria in your vagina and cause irritation and inflammation, Needle says.

Can I use coconut oil as a lube for sex?

Yup. Coconut oil is commonly used as a natural lube, and it’s totally safe, says Needle, because these types of lubes don’t have chemicals or extra ingredients in them that may not be safe for your downstairs area. ‘If you have sensitive skin or any kind of skin condition, which are more common these days, they can be more comfortable’ to use, she explains.

Can I use baby oil as a lube for sex?

Nah, Needle doesn’t recommend it. While baby oil can be moisturising for your vagina, it’s not meant to be a lube, as it can cause irritation and be hard to get off of your skin and bed sheets once you’re done.

All in all, lube is a fabulous addition to any sexual play. Just find one with safe ingredients, apply a bit at a time, lather up, and most importantly, enjoy!

Complete Article HERE!

Male infertility is more common than you may think.

— Here are five ways to protect your sperm

By Karin Hammarberg

Infertility is often thought of as a female problem, but one in three IVF cycles in Australia involve male infertility.

We recently published a review of the literature on whether men diagnosed with male factor infertility experience greater psychological distress than fertile men or men with an infertile partner. We found irrespective of the cause of infertility, men in couples with infertility have more symptoms of depression, anxiety and general psychological distress, worse quality of some aspects of life, and lower self-esteem than fertile men.

Research also shows sperm counts are declining worldwide, and that lifestyle and environmental factors can reduce male fertility.

While most male causes of infertility aren’t preventable, it’s important to know how to keep your sperm as healthy as possible. Here are five things men can do to boost their fertility.

1. Try to be in the healthy weight range

Obesity causes hormonal changes that have negative effects on semen, including the total number of sperm, the ability of the sperm to move, the number of live sperm, and the number of sperm with a normal shape.

These reduce the chance of both spontaneous and IVF conception.

The good news is the adverse effects on fertility caused by excess weight in men are reversible. Regular exercise and a healthy diet can help reduce weight and improve sperm quality.

There’s strong evidence a healthy diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, nuts, low-fat dairy, and seafood, and low in red and processed meats, sweets, and sweetened beverages is linked to better sperm quality.

2. Avoid recreational drugs

Recreational drug use is associated with poorer reproductive health. Psychoactive drugs such as cocaine, benzodiazepines, heroin, methamphetamine, oxycodone and ecstasy negatively affect male reproductive functions, including sexual urge, testosterone production, sperm production, and sperm quality.

While research on the link between marijuana use and sperm quality is inconclusive, some evidence suggests frequent marijuana use can reduce sperm quality and is a risk factor for testicular cancer.

3. Stay clear of anabolic steroids

Some men use anabolic steroids to enhance their physical performance and appearance. Globally, it’s estimated about one in 16 men (6.4%) use anabolic steroids sometime during their life. Male weightlifters aged 20-39 years, competitive fighters, and security personnel are among the most common users of anabolic steroids.

Anabolic steroids contribute to muscle growth and fat loss, but they also affect sexual function, including by reducing the size of testicles, reducing or stopping sperm production, and causing impotence and infertility.

Studies show most men start producing sperm again within a year of stopping anabolic steroids. But a recent study of men who became infertile as a result of anabolic steroids found that for some there is long-term damage to sperm production.

In this study of men who had stopped using anabolic steroids and had a six-month course of hormone treatment to improve sperm production, more than half still produced no sperm at all or very few sperm after six months.

4. Quit smoking and vaping

We all know tobacco smoking is terrible for our general health, but there’s now evidence it’s also bad for male fertility and reproductive outcomes.

In the past decade, vaping has become increasingly popular, especially among young adults. More than 500 e-cigarette brands and 8000 flavours have been commercialised. There’s now growing evidence from animal studies that vaping can harm male reproductive health, and experts recommend avoiding vaping when trying to conceive.

5. Reduce exposure to environmental chemicals

In our everyday lives we’re exposed to many different environmental chemicals – through the products we use, the food we eat, and the air we breathe. So-called endocrine-disrupting chemicals can reduce the quality of sperm and cause problems with fertility because they can mimic or block male sex hormones.

It’s impossible to avoid these chemicals completely, because they’re all around us. But you can take some simple steps to reduce your exposure, including:

  • washing fruit and vegetables
  • eating fewer processed, canned or pre-packaged foods
  • drinking from glass or hard plastic bottles, rather than soft plastic bottles
  • heating food in a china or glass bowl covered with paper towel or a plate rather than using plastic takeaway containers or those covered with cling wrap.

To inform men about how to look after their sperm, Your Fertility, a fertility health promotion program delivered by the Victorian Assisted Reproductive Treatment Authority, teamed up with Melbourne comedian Michael Shafar to create some helpful educational videos.

STI Testing and Older Adults

— Why awareness and prevention are essential to avoiding sexually transmitted infections (STIs)

STI testing is often recommended annually. However, your lifestyle, health history and other factors can affect how often you can be tested.

By Sadia Arshad

Discussing sexual health, pleasure and STI testing for older adults can seem taboo, even in social circles or health care settings. While sex can be a great source of fun, connection and excitement, the unsexy reality of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) exists, even as we age.

One study examined the sexual health and lives of older adults, noting that over 50% report engaging in sexual activity. While older adults have sex, there are several misconceptions about preventing STIs, such as the lack of condom use, sexual health education for older adults and the lack of discussions around sexual health.

STI rates have steadily increased nationwide and are expected to increase, causing a demand for understanding STI testing for older adults and STI prevention awareness.

More people find sexual partners via dating apps and social networks, leading to increased sexual encounters without adequate education on STI prevention. In addition, STI rates have steadily increased nationwide and are expected to continue to increase, causing a demand for understanding STI testing for older adults and STI prevention awareness.

STI Testing for Older Adults

STI testing is something that anyone, regardless of age, can feel shy, embarrassed or hesitant to talk about. Testing can be done in many health care settings and doesn’t have to be done precisely at a women’s, men’s or sexual health clinic.

If you have a primary care provider (PCP), your PCP can order STI testing. It is important to note that many health care providers do not receive formal training on discussing sexual health, let alone discussing sexual health and STI testing for older adults.

Talking with your partners and educating yourself are significant steps to ensuring you are in control of your sexual health.

You can take your time and search locally to see who can be a good fit for you to discuss your sexual health needs. You can also educate yourself on STIs and testing options. You can even order an at-home STI testing kit for you and your partner(s).

If you engage in sexual activity, such as oral sex, anal sex or vaginal sex, you are at risk of contracting an STI. Talking with your partners and educating yourself are significant steps to ensuring you are in control of your sexual health. It’s time to be prepared so that you can have the best sex life possible.

Common Bacterial STIs

  • Chlamydia is a bacterial infection and among the most common STIs. It can be tested via a urine sample or localized swab, such as a vaginal swab.
  • Gonorrhea is a bacterial infection that has earned public attention for newer antibiotic-resistant strains. It can be tested via a urine sample or localized swab, such as a throat swab.
  • Syphilis is another bacterial infection and has earned much public attention for making a nationwide resurgence after almost being undetected in America for years. It can be tested for via a blood sample.

Typical Viral STIs

  • Human Papilloma Virus or HPV:HPV is the most common STI in the United States and can lead to certain cancers if left untreated, such as cervical or oral cancer or genital warts. Many times, HPV can remain dormant in someone’s body for years without any signs of infection. Testing is done via a Pap smear for women, but currently, there is no approved HPV test for men.
  • Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV): HSV is a viral STI that can be transmitted via skin-to-skin contact. Like HPV, HSV can remain dormant in someone’s body for years without any signs of infection. HSV testing is done via blood sample.
  • Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV): HIV is a viral STI that can progress to acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS) if left untreated. HIV can be transmitted via breast milk, blood, semen and vaginal fluids. It can be tested for via saliva or blood sample.

Other Common STIs

  • Trichomoniasis is a parasite that can be transmitted via sexual contact. It can be tested via a urine sample or localized swab, such as a penile swab.
  • Hepatitis A is a type of liver infection that can be transmitted via the oral-fecal route, such as when someone is engaging in oral sex on the anus or eating contaminated food. Hepatitis A can be tested via blood samples and prevented with the Hepatitis A vaccine.
  • Hepatitis B is another type of liver infection that can be transmitted sexually and via blood. Like Hepatitis A, it can be tested for via blood sample and prevented with the Hepatitis B vaccine.

Your lifestyle, health history and other factors can affect how often you can be tested for STIs.

When looking for STI testing, whether using an at-home kit or in your doctor’s office, ask or look to see which infections will be tested for. Remember, you can ask your doctor about particular sexual health concerns, and the doctor will review them with you.

Costs and Results

Unfortunately, an exact cost is hard to provide, given the nature of insurance coverage and the types of tests you get. Contact your insurance company or seek STI testing at your local public health departments if concerned about cost.

STI tests are often available within a few weeks, like other medical testing. Most health care practices have online patient portals in which you can see your results when they are posted. If you test positive for an STI, most clinics will notify you and discuss your STI management options.

How Often Should You Get Tested for STIs?

That is a personal choice, as that frequently depends on how much sex you are having. If you are having sex with the same person and that person is having sex with only you in a monogamous relationship, then your risk for STIs is not as high as someone who engages in casual sex with various partners.

Generally, STI testing is often recommended annually. However, your lifestyle, health history and other factors can affect how often you can be tested for STIs.

Morevoer, the most common STI symptom is no symptoms. Many people have perceptions of STIs only affecting certain people, such as people who “look dirty” or “look like they have a lot of sex.” Untreated STIs can lead to chronic pelvic pain, pelvic inflammatory disease and possibly more health complications.

Many older people are having sex, are contracting STIs, and are not being offered STI testing because of ageism, negative bias and shame around sexual health.

Talking to your doctor about your sexual health questions and asking about STI testing can be nerve-wracking at times, yet it is critical to your health. Sexual health is health care and an essential part of your well-being.

Complete Article HERE!

The Dangers of Recreational Viagra

— The risks of taking Viagra without erectile dysfunction range from mild side effects to dangerous drug interactions

By Raevti Bole, MD

Advertisements for erectile dysfunction (ED) medication are everywhere. Viagra® and Cialis® are enormously popular. And as the ads suggest, they’re highly effective at improving sexual performance in people with ED.< But the use of these medications is also booming in people who don’t have sexual problems. But know this: This “recreational” use of Viagra can be risky.

Why do people without ED take Viagra?

To understand why people experiment with Viagra and Cialis recreationally, it’s helpful to understand how these drugs work.

Viagra and Cialis belong to a category of drugs called phosphodiesterase type 5 (PDE5) inhibitors. These medications open blood vessels and can be used to treat pulmonary hypertension and urinary problems.

But most famously, medications like Viagra and Cialis are used to address erectile dysfunction. The reason? Increased blood flow from PDE5 inhibitors results in firmer, longer-lasting erections.

Now, it’s important to note that erection firmness can be subjective. Most people will notice temporary differences in the quality of their erection depending on stress, energy levels, time of day, alcohol consumption and many other factors.

But if someone can reliably get and keep an erection that’s rigid enough for penetrative intercourse, they probably don’t have ED or a real need to pop a Viagra or Cialis, explains Dr. Bole.

That said, people without ED have recreationally used Viagra or Cialis to increase blood flow to their penis because they want to:

  • Counteract the effects of alcohol or other drugs on their sexual performance.
  • Improve the chances of an erection lasting long enough for sex multiple times.
  • Increase their confidence by reducing anxiety about performance or premature ejaculation.

Does Viagra improve athletic performance?

People also use Viagra and Cialis recreationally to improve their exercise performance. But does it really work? To keep the answer simple: No.

“PDE5 medications can increase oxygen levels and heart function in people who have cardiac risk factors or cardiac disease,” says Dr. Bole. “For people who are healthy, there’s no good evidence that the medications significantly improve athletic abilities in a standard, sea-level environment.”

Why mention the altitude? Well, there’s some evidence that Viagra may make a difference for those doing activities in thin air at higher altitudes.

Researchers found that cyclists taking sildenafil, the medicine marketed as Viagra, improved cardiac output and exercise performance at higher altitudes. Another study focused on Mount Everest trekkers showed that sildenafil increased exercise capacity at high altitudes.

As noted, though, any benefits experienced closer to the clouds do not transfer to lower altitudes where most of us spend our time.

Five risks of recreational Viagra use

The potential consequences of taking Viagra and Cialis recreationally depend on medical, psychological and social factors. The risks range from mild to serious and include:

1. Dangerous interactions with other drugs

PDE5 inhibitors lower blood pressure. Mixing them with other drugs that also lower blood pressure can be potentially life-threatening, says Dr. Bole.

Be sure to review with your healthcare provider all supplements and medications you’re taking to check for potential interactions. Here are some examples of medications known to interact with Viagra or Cialis:

  • Amyl nitrate, which can also be misused as a street drug known as “poppers.”
  • Nitroglycerine, a medication used to treat angina (chest pain) in people with coronary artery disease.
  • Certain types of blood pressure medications, prescription drugs that lower high blood pressure. (Isosorbide mononitrate is one example.)

2. Uncomfortable side effects

The side effects of Viagra and Cialis are usually mild. Headache is a common side effect that can vary from mild to pounding. You may also experience:

  • Acid reflux.
  • Facial flushing.
  • Muscle aches.
  • Stuffy nose.
  • Vision changes.

One of the most severe adverse events is called priapism, a painful erection that lasts for several hours. “Luckily2, it is quite rare when using oral ED medications,” notes Dr. Bole. “But if this happens to you, seek emergency medical care immediately.”

3. Psychological dependency

Frequent use of Viagra or Cialis just to boost confidence can create psychological dependency — especially if you’ve never discussed the issue with anyone. You may eventually feel that you need it to have sex, creating a long-term issue for you and your partner.

“If you are having severe performance anxiety that’s affecting your erections, I recommend talking to your healthcare provider or a sex therapist,” says Dr. Bole.

“A medical professional can discuss your worries about sex; help you set personalized and realistic expectations; and develop strategies to improve your confidence without relying on medication alone.”

You may still choose to try a medication, but understanding the psychology behind sexual performance is a healthier strategy.

4. Unknown dosage and contaminants

ED drugs and supplements are easy to find without a prescription. People get them from friends, family members and online. You can even find them sold as vitamin or herbal supplements at gas stations.

But without a prescription from a reputable provider, you don’t know the dosage of active ingredients in the pills you’re taking or even what may truly be in the medication.

For example, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has issued advisories for “Rhino” male enhancement products. These products are available at gas stations, corner stores and online. Marketed as “dietary supplements,” tests show they may contain hidden PDE5 inhibitors.

Taking these sorts of fraudulent products can be dangerous for unsuspecting consumers, warns the FDA.

5. Association with high-risk behaviors

Combining Viagra or Cialis with alcohol or drugs can lower inhibitions. As a result, you may be more likely to engage in risky sexual behavior that could expose you to sexually transmitted infections (STIs).

“Using ED medications to enhance your sexual performance when you’re under the influence of alcohol or drugs can lead you to make choices that harm your sexual and overall health,” stresses Dr. Bole.

When to talk to your provider about Viagra use

If you’re taking Viagra or Cialis recreationally to improve your sexual or exercise performance, Dr. Bole recommends letting your provider know.

Long-term use could mask a real decline in erectile function due to underlying health problems such as:

“Some patients may feel reluctant or embarrassed to talk about their sex life,” recognizes Dr. Bole. “But we have these conversations all the time with patients. You are not alone. Our role is to help you understand the risks versus benefits and provide guidance without judgment.”

Complete Article HERE!

Multiple Sclerosis

— How to Have a Healthy Sex Life

Multiple sclerosis (MS), like many other chronic medical conditions, can affect every aspect of a person’s life, including their sex life. MS can create physical and emotional barriers that must be overcome to have a healthy sex life. Here is what you need to know about sex and MS.

By

  • MS can decrease sex drive and cause sexual dysfunction in men and women.
  • The emotional toll of MS can affect sexual function and intimate relationships.
  • Sexual dysfunction caused by MS is treatable with medication and other therapies. Patience, communication, and therapy can help improve relationship problems caused by MS.

Multiple Sclerosis (MS)

Multiple sclerosis affects 2.8 million people worldwide, including 1 million people in the United States alone. MS is an immune-mediated disease that occurs when the body’s immune system attacks healthy nerve cells, ultimately preventing nerves from communicating with one another. MS affects nerves within the brain and throughout the body, causing both physical and mental problems. MS affects the body and the mind, both of which are involved in sexual function.

MS can affect different parts of the brain as well as different parts of the body. This causes people with MS to have different symptoms, severity, and disease progression. While individual experiences with MS vary, MS presents similar challenges and difficulties for everyone.

Physical effects of MS

MS can cause a variety of sexual problems, both directly and indirectly. These are described as primary, secondary, and tertiary sexual dysfunction. Because the brain plays a role in many different bodily functions, problems with communication within and outside the brain can affect sexual function by influencing hormone levels, mental sexual arousal, and physical sexual response. There are many, often unexpected, ways that MS can impact your life.

The effects of primary sexual dysfunction caused by MS include:

  • Low libido (sex drive).
  • Numbness or decreased sensitivity of the genitals.
  • Erectile dysfunction.
  • Poor vaginal lubrication.
  • Difficulty achieving orgasm or ejaculation.

Secondary sexual dysfunction caused by MS includes:

  • Muscle weakness.
  • Muscle spasticity.
  • Fatigue.
  • Pain.
  • Incontinence.

Emotional effects of MS

Sex is both physical and mental; your mental or emotional state affects your sex life. MS can have a profoundly negative impact on mental health and relationships.

Tertiary sexual dysfunction includes problems caused by the emotional and psychological effects of MS.

Depression can cause sexual dysfunction by lowering sex drive, decreasing sexual arousal, and preventing or delaying orgasm. Low self-esteem and poor body image can lead to emotional insecurity. Physical and emotional problems caused by MS can make it difficult to establish and maintain intimate relationships.

How to improve sex with MS

MS, like other chronic illnesses, can force you to make adjustments to how you would normally do things in your day-to-day life; this includes sex. You can improve your sex life by understanding the effects that MS has on your body and mind and making changes to your physical and emotional approach to sex.
Treat sexual dysfunction

MS causes sexual dysfunction in men and women, but it is treatable. There are many treatments available for erectile dysfunction, but there are also treatments available for women with sexual dysfunction marked by difficulty with arousal and orgasm.

To improve sexual dysfunction caused by MS:

  • Treat erectile dysfunction (pills, injections, pumps).
  • Treat female arousal problems with Addyi (flibanserin) or Vyleesi (bremelanotide).
  • Use water-soluble lubrication liberally.
  • Use sex toys to increase stimulation.

Make adjustments based on your limitations

Weakness, pain, and physical limitations can make sex more difficult, but you can make adjustments to your sexual routine to account for these things.

To overcome physical limitations caused by MS:

  1. Adjust sexual positions to increase comfort, reduce pain, and improve stimulation;
  2. Use medication to help with incontinence;
  3. Take medication side effects into account; adjust when you take medications.

Building better relationships with MS

Physical difficulties caused by MS are only half of the problem; the other half is mental. Building and maintaining healthy intimate relationships can be difficult regardless of physical limitations or emotional problems. Relationship problems affect everyone at some point in their lives, whether you have MS or not. Any relationship, sexual or not, can benefit from self-care, patience, and good communication.

To have a healthy intimate relationship with MS:

  1. Seek support, therapy, and/or medication to deal with emotional problems;
  2. Communicate your needs, desires, and expectations with your partner;
  3. Consider couples counseling or sexual therapy.

Communication is the cornerstone of any interpersonal relationship. Good communication is essential for healthy intimate relationships, especially when there are barriers that make intimacy more difficult. Perhaps the most important steps you can take to strengthen a relationship is to share your expectations with your partner and work together to meet those expectations.

Multiple sclerosis takes a physical and emotional toll on those who suffer from it. MS can decrease sexual drive, impair sexual function, make sex physically difficult, and damage intimate relationships. Fortunately, there are ways to improve sexual drive and function in those with MS by using medication and other sexual dysfunction therapies. Additionally, understanding the limitations to sexual activity caused by MS can help you make adjustments that allow you to meet your physical needs. Finally, patience and good communication with your partner are essential for establishing and maintaining a healthy intimate relationship.

A diagnosis of MS is life-changing for both you and those closest to you. MS presents many challenges to living a “normal” life, but those challenges can be met and conquered. Don’t let a diagnosis of MS or other chronic illness keep you from pursuing intimacy or other things that help make life fulfilling.

Complete Article HERE!

How sex toys for men went mainstream

— And we’re vibing it

Men’s sex coach Cam Fraser is all for this sexual revolution.

By Sarah Noonan and Holly Berckelman

We’re living in the age of normalising sexual wellness, and it looks like the boys are getting on board. Here are the latest innovations in the male sex toy sphere you need to get your hands on.

Sexual wellness is coming for men. In fact, it has been for quite some time now. The proof?

A global market report conducted in the mecca of sex – the US – has revealed the male sex toy industry is set to hit a compound annual growth rate of more than seven per cent over the next decade, expanding the overall market value from $23,000 in 2019 to an eye-watering $59 billion by 2032. And with the current popularity of female pleasure heating up social discourse, it seems sex toys for guys have officially gone mainstream.

“I think society is gradually shifting towards a more open and inclusive dialogue about male sexual wellness, beyond function and hydraulics,” says men’s sex and relationships coach, Cam Fraser.

“[Generally speaking], this trend is indicative of a broader cultural movement toward destigmatising sexual exploration and prioritising mutually pleasurable experiences.”

While long assumed to be only for women, there is, in reality, a huge and varied range of sex toys designed explicitly for men. And all men at that. Whether you’re shopping for yourself or a male partner – there’s a sex toy out there to enhance both solo or partner play.

According to a survey by pleasure-aid brand, Womanizer, men masturbate an average of 155 times per year, which equates to almost three times per week.

“As restrictive stereotypes about being a ‘real man’ have lessened, many men have become more comfortable with exploring different aspects of pleasure,” says Fraser, adding that digital dialogues have also played a major role in this shift.

“Social media, wellness influencers and a more open public conversation about masculinity and sexuality have contributed to normalising discussions around male sexual health and pleasure… [and] a more accepting and curious attitude toward exploring one’s own body and desires.”

These stats alone beg the question: if you’re putting that much time into something, why not spice things up a bit?

Turns out toys can have major health benefits

According to science (yes, actual science), masturbation, prostate massage and using sex toys can be life saving for men.

Firstly, it turns out masturbation can lower your prostate cancer risk, improve heart health, boost immunity and (if you orgasm once or twice a week) help you live longer.

“The man who has 350 orgasms a year, versus the national average of around a third of that, lives about four years longer,” says Michael Roizen, the chair of the Wellness Institute at the Cleveland Clinic who conducted a study on the topic.

Meanwhile, in Wales, researchers determined that men who had two or more orgasms a week halved their rate of mortality to those who had orgasms less than once a month.

“Sexual activity seems to have a protective effect on men’s health,” the researchers concluded, and these numbers are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to longevity.

Experts say that the new breed of male sex tech can actually help with sexual issues such as erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, lack of libido and post-surgical problems, like urine flow, for a variety of conditions.

In fact, one study revealed that “72 per cent of men with secondary delayed orgasm [difficulty achieving ejaculation or orgasm] were able to restore orgasm with penile vibratory stimulation” – aka the use of male vibrators.

If that hasn’t put you in the mood for self-love, then we don’t know what will.

Design is more high-tech than ever before

“In addition to improved ergonomic designs and advancing technology, which have made self-pleasure more appealing and enjoyable, I think the way that sex toys are being marketed and packaged has encouraged more men to explore self-pleasure,” says Fraser.

“Instead of sleazy, back-alley shops and lewd imagery, many toys are now being sold by reputable companies in sleek and unassuming packaging.”

Brands are creating a range of vibrators for men that are rooted in enjoyment – both physically and aesthetically – meaning, most of the time, they don’t actually resemble one.

“When we develop our toys, their design is always top-of-mind,” says Sarah Moglia, head of innovation at sexual pleasure brand, Arcwave. “We keep our products discrete-looking so that users don’t feel the need to hide them away when not in use.”

In fact, most new designs can be displayed around the home as a piece of art without impromptu visitors knowing what they actually are.

“Not only should the toys bring users sexual satisfaction, but we also want them to look great in interior spaces so that our customers can feel proud that they are embracing pleasure,” says Moglia.

“These changes have made sex toys more approachable and accessible, perhaps resulting in men feeling less ashamed to purchase [and use] them,” adds Fraser.

“I think this signals a promising future for sexual wellness, where personal pleasure is both prioritised and destigmatised.” It’s something female brands have been adopting for a while now, but an element that has long been neglected in male pleasure.

Earlier this year, Womanizer unveiled the world’s first shower head designed for masturbation.

Created in partnership with luxury German bathware manufacturer, Hansgrohe, the Wave shower head looks discreet in the bathroom, but packs a punch when it comes to enjoyment.

“A chic-looking sex toy on your shelf, bedside table or in your shower is the ultimate tool – both aesthetically and sexually,” says Elisabeth Neumann, sexologist and head of user research at Womanizer.

“Design has played a significant role in changing perceptions around pleasure and sex toys,” adds Fraser. “By focusing on aesthetics, functionality and discretion, [brands] are breaking down stereotypes that sex toys are either taboo or vulgar.”

Not only is this pivotal in normalising sexual wellness as an integral element of overall health and wellbeing, but it also plays a major role in reducing shame around sex and self-care. And we’re all for that.

Complete Article HERE!

PrEP: What is the HIV prevention drug and how effective is it?

— PrEP has been hailed by sexual health experts as crucial in bringing the HIV epidemic to an end, but studies show that only 20 per cent of the British public even know it exists.

BY CONOR CLARK

Taking PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) is one of the most effective ways to reduce the risk of getting HIV, but knowledge about it among the British public remains scarce. In fact, just 20 per cent of people in the UK know it exists, according to research conducted by YouGov on behalf of Terrence Higgins Trust, the country’s leading sexual health charity. A staggering 77 per cent were also unaware that England can end new cases of HIV by 2030, which sexual health experts have said PrEP is key to making a reality. So, what is the drug, how effective is it at preventing HIV and where can you get it?

What is PrEP?

PrEP (sometimes known as Truvada) is a medicine that drastically reduces the risk of getting HIV from sex or injection drug use when taken effectively. It typically comes in the form of a tablet containing tenofovir disoproxil and emtricitabine, both of which are used to treat HIV. Once there’s enough of the drug inside you, it works by blocking HIV from getting into the body and replicating itself.

Long-acting injectable PrEP also exists and has been approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) in the US, though is not yet available in the UK. It can also exist as a vaginal ring, though this is also not yet available in the UK.

PrEP does not protect you against any other sexually transmitted infections (STIs).

How effective is it at preventing HIV?

When taken effectively, PrEP reduces the risk of getting HIV from sex by 99 per cent. When taking it daily, PrEP needs to be taken for seven days until it becomes fully effective.

The PrEP Impact Trial, which involved more than 24,000 participants across 157 sexual health services from October 2017 to July 2020, proved the real-world effectiveness of the drug and concluded that it should be used more widely to prevent the spread of HIV. John Stewart, National Director for Specialised Commissioning at NHS England and co-Chair of the PrEP Impact Trial Oversight Board, said: “Not only did the trial directly prevent many cases of HIV, help normalise the use of PrEP, remove stigma and pave the way for a routinely commissioned clinically and cost-effective PrEP service; but it also made a very real contribution towards our goal of ending new cases of HIV by 2030.”

How often should I take it?

Most people take it orally in the form of a tablet, either regularly (one a day) or ‘event-based’ (two tablets two to 24 hours before sex, then one 24 hours after sex and a further one 48 hours after).

Those who were assigned female at birth and trans people using hormone treatment are recommended to take PrEP daily due to the lack of data available in supporting other dosing options. More information about this is available here.

Do I still need to test for HIV if I’m on PrEP?

The short answer is yes. Sam, a doctor at the Dean Street sexual health clinics in London, which are world-famous for their services to LGBTQIA+ people, said: “PrEP is the most effective way of protecting yourself from HIV. However, mistakes can happen with taking your PrEP, so we still advise testing every three to four months for HIV and all the other STIs.”

Kidney tests are done before you begin taking PrEP and continue routinely while you are on it. This is because it can sometimes affect your kidneys, though this is incredibly rare and typically only happens in those aged 50 and older or those who already have kidney problems.

Are there any side effects?

Not everyone gets side effects from PrEP and those who do usually see them go away after the first few weeks of taking it. “This is one of the number one reasons for people not wanting to take PrEP, but actually only about one in 10 people get side effects from PrEP and these tend to be quite mild and not very severe,” Sam told GAY TIMES.

According to the NHS, the most common side effects some people experience are:

  • Headache
  • Nausea and/or vomiting
  • Diarrhoea
  • Feeling dizzy and/or weak
  • Trouble sleeping
  • Bloating and/or indigestion

Clinicians recommend that anyone experiencing side effects seek medical advice if they persist.

Complete Article HERE!

Maintaining an Active Sex Life With Prostate Cancer

— A fulfilling sex life is still possible during and after treatment for prostate cancer.

By Larry Buhl

Every type of prostate cancer treatment has the potential to negatively affect sexual function and may impact fertility. But there is good news: A variety of therapies make it possible to have an active and fulfilling sex life during and after prostate cancer treatment, even if it means slightly reimagining what it means to have good sex. If your sex life has been altered by prostate cancer treatments, some unwanted side effects like erectile dysfunction have been known to improve over time, according to Johns Hopkins Medicine.

How Does Prostate Cancer Affect Sexual Function?

Strictly speaking, prostate cancer itself doesn’t affect sex, and you likely won’t have sexual side effects from prostate cancer, at least in the early stages, according to the American Cancer Society. But you could have some frustrating side effects from the treatments for prostate cancer.

The prostate is surrounded by nerves, muscles, and blood vessels that help produce an erection, but the prostate isn’t required for an erection or orgasm. However, the prostate and seminal vesicles are required for ejaculation and fertility. Some cancer treatments may affect the ability to get an erection and ejaculate.

Sexual Side Effects of Prostate Cancer Treatments

Prostate Surgery

It’s important to understand that orgasm and ejaculation are different physical reactions, although they often happen at the same time. Because the prostate and seminal vesicles are removed in a prostatectomy, no ejaculation can happen, but an erection and orgasm can happen. Sometimes the climax is called a dry orgasm because there is no semen.

Typically, a surgeon will attempt a sparing prostatectomy to save the neurovascular bundles on the side of the prostate that are necessary for erections and orgasms. But sometimes these nerves are damaged in surgery, which could diminish the ability to get erections or keep them.

If there is nerve damage, erectile dysfunction can improve over time even without intervention, according to Raevti Bole, MD, a urologist and specialist in men’s health at the Cleveland Clinic. “In general, patients notice the biggest impact on their erections right after surgery, then start to see improvements for up to two years after surgery,” says Dr. Bole.

There’s also the potential for another frustrating side effect of surgery: climacturia, or orgasmic incontinence. This is when a bit of urine leaks out during arousal. It is treatable through bladder training and exercising the pelvic floor muscles, or Kegel exercises.

Radiation

Although the goal of radiation therapy is to deliver the treatment to only the areas affected by cancer, sometimes it affects nearby nerves as well. When this happens, the nerves may not send a signal to have an erection. Unlike a prostatectomy, for which the biggest impact is right after surgery, the effects from radiation, if they happen, may occur over the course of years.

“Patients who have radiation can still orgasm and ejaculate, but often their ejaculate is diminished because, over time, the seminal vesicles in the prostate don’t produce semen like they used to,” says Scott Shelfo, MD, the medical director of urology at City of Hope in Atlanta.

Chemotherapy

Chemotherapy is unlikely to cause erectile dysfunction, though it does have other side effects, such as fatigue and hair loss. Chemotherapy can, however, lower testosterone levels during the treatment period, per the National Cancer Institute, which leads to decreased libido. Chemo is always given in conjunction with hormonal therapy.

Hormone Therapy

Hormone therapy is used to stop the progression of cancer by significantly reducing testosterone, which can affect libido. With lower testosterone, the desire to have sex decreases. Low testosterone, or low T, can also affect the quality of erections, even though it isn’t physically affecting the sensory nerves. Testosterone is important for maintaining rigidity as well.

But patients with prostate cancer aren’t likely to be on hormone therapy for life. The length of time depends on the aggressiveness of the cancer. If you’ve been on hormone therapy for a while and the cancer is under control, you might have a discussion with your oncologist about taking a “hormone holiday,” according to Bole. “But there will still be intensive monitoring to make sure you’re doing it safely,” Bole says.

Common Questions About Sexual Side Effects of Prostate Cancer

Can You Function Sexually Without a Prostate?

There is life after prostate cancer, and you absolutely can have sex after a prostatectomy, although the quality of the sex depends on how well the nerves that stimulate erections and lead to orgasms survive the surgery.

Regardless of any possible damage to the nerves around the prostate, the sensory nerves, which are different from the ones that control erections, remain untouched by surgery. This means that the process that leads to arousal, but not necessarily erections, shouldn’t change.

Can You Get an Erection if You Have Prostate Cancer or Had Your Prostate Removed?

Yes. The nerves that control erections run along the back of the prostate. As long as the cancer has not invaded those nerves, your surgeon will make every effort to peel the prostate gland from those nerves without doing damage to them.

“If the surgeon does a good prostatectomy, and the patient had good erectile function before it, they have a better chance [of avoiding erectile dysfunction],” says Dr. Shelfo. Of course, if you had erectile dysfunction before prostate removal, chances are that you’re still going to have it after the procedure.

Can You Ejaculate After Prostate Removal?

No. Once the prostate is removed along with seminal vesicles, you can’t ejaculate.

Does Sex Feel Different After Prostate Removal?

Sex after prostate removal might feel different for some people. People with intact prostates often ejaculate and orgasm at the same time, although they are actually different processes. With prostate removal, erections and orgasms should be unchanged, unless the nerves around the prostate are damaged.

But Bole, who surveys patients after surgery, found that some patients find a dry orgasm after prostate surgery less satisfying, adding that same-sex couples may have issues if one partner is lacking a prostate. “For men having receptive anal intercourse, where the prostate is a source of pleasure, having the prostate removed definitely changes the sexual experience,” Bole says.

Can Prostate Cancer Affect Fertility?

Prostate cancer itself won’t necessarily affect fertility, but prostate removal definitely will. When the prostate and seminal vesicles are removed, there can be no ejaculation, which is necessary for fertility.

Sperm is still being produced, however. It’s possible to retrieve sperm surgically though a testicular biopsy for use in assisted reproductive procedures like in vitro fertilization.

Because the average age of prostate cancer diagnosis is 66 years old, according to Cancer.Net, many patients with prostate cancer will be past the age of wanting to conceive.

With other treatments that leave the prostate in place, there may be an impact on erections, depending on whether the nerves that lead to arousal are damaged. However, if you have a prostate, it is possible to ejaculate without a full erection, according to UCLA Health.

Treating Erectile Dysfunction Caused by Prostate Cancer

Nearly all patients will experience some erectile dysfunction after a prostatectomy. How long it lasts depends on age, overall health, and the amount of damage done to the nerves surrounding the prostate, says Johns Hopkins Medicine.

Some erectile dysfunction treatments include the following:

  • Medications Sildenafil (Viagra), vardenafil (Levitra), and tadalafil (Cialis) will help if the issue is getting blood to the penis but won’t be effective if the nerves have been damaged by surgery or radiation. This class of drugs won’t help with low libido.
  • Vacuum Erection Device Also called a penis pump, the device pulls blood into the penis. It can be effective for men who can get an erection but can’t maintain it.
  • Penile Injection Therapy You give yourself a shot at the base of the penis with a mixture of alprostadil, phentolamine, and papaverine (Trimix) to open the blood vessels in the penis and help achieve an erection.
  • Penile Implants These devices placed in the penis to get an erection are sometimes recommended when other treatments for erectile dysfunction fail.

“I always tell my patients, When there’s a will, there’s a way for you to get a firm enough erection for sex,” says Shelfo.

In addition to these interventions, lifestyle changes such as quitting smoking and cutting back on drinking can improve the ability to get an erection, per Cancer Research UK. This is also true for men with erectile dysfunction not related to prostate cancer treatment.

Reimagining Good Sex

Many men believe that good sex involves an erect — and constantly erect — penis, as well as an orgasm and ejaculation. But Bole says that if there are unwanted sexual side effects of prostate cancer treatment, it’s possible to imagine different ways to be sexual.

“Sexual therapy, psychology [experts], and couples counseling can help patients communicate with their partners about what they’re going through and explore other ways to be intimate and express affection,” she says.

Any kind of treatment for cancer can affect not just your anatomy and sexual function but also the way you feel about yourself. Bole says that it’s important to speak with doctors before treatment for prostate cancer about what kinds of sexual changes can be expected. “A lot of times, when the oncologist identifies a problem, they are good at reaching out to get the patient a consultation with someone like myself or one of my partners who specializes in talking about some of the [symptoms] that might not be brought up during an oncology-focused visit,” says Bole.

Complete Article HERE!

Misinformation Is on the Rise.

— Here’s What You Need to Know About Birth Control.

Three Black reproductive experts discuss how to access birth control, navigate the misinformation online, and understand what’s unfolding politically.

By Margo Snipe

It’s been a tricky landscape since Roe v. Wade was overturned almost two years ago, as reproductive health care has become increasingly complicated to navigate — and misinformation is on the rise.

Not only are the attacks on abortion care merging with limits on the availability of infertility treatment, but the same court that reversed the constitutional protection for abortion will hear arguments this week on restricting access to mifepristone, one of two medications commonly used to induce an abortion. And on the state level, new bills are aiming to cut back contraception options.

In Oklahoma, one bill in the state legislature has sparked questions about whether it might ban emergency contraception — like the day-after Plan B pill — and intrauterine devices, or IUDs. Part of it targets contraception that prevents the implantation of a fertilized egg. At the same time, some birth control options are expanding. This month, Opill, the first over-the-counter birth control pill, began sales. And, under a new policy, New York pharmacists can dispense certain hormonal contraceptives without a prescription.

Capital B asked three Black reproductive health care experts some of the big questions about how to access birth control, navigate the misinformation online, and understand what’s unfolding politically. Here’s what you need to know.

What is the difference between abortion care and birth control?

Amid the uptick in misinformation, experts want patients to understand there is a distinct difference between abortion care and birth control. Birth control, like the pill and IUDs, is not abortion inducing, doctors say.

While both are considered a part of reproductive health care, birth control, also called contraception, is intended to prevent pregnancy before it occurs and is often discussed and prescribed by gynecologists, which are doctors who specialize in women’s reproductive health systems. 

“Birth control is acting to fundamentally prevent pregnancy,” said Dr. Alexandra Wells, an OB-GYN in Washington state. It works by stopping sperm from meeting the egg, she said.

Abortion care is separate. It terminates an already existing pregnancy, either out of patient choice up to a certain time period or medical necessity. It takes place after folks know they are pregnant and is typically managed by obstetricians, or doctors that focus on the pregnancy of patients. Many practitioners have their training in both gynecology and obstetrics.

Over the past year, how has the landscape over available birth control changed?

With so many different bills being introduced in states across the country, aiming to both limit and expand access to reproductive health care, the amount of misinformation spreading across social media platforms is surging.

While birth control and abortion care are different, the landscape in terms of access to both is shifting nationwide.

Soon after the 2022 Dobbs decision reversing federal abortion protections, when states began moving to restrict abortion, many physicians were concerned about the implications on birth control, said Dr. Yolanda Lawson, a Texas-based OB-GYN. It was not the first time. Several years prior, in the Burwell v. Hobby Lobby case, the U.S. Supreme Court decided that corporations run by religious families cannot be required to pay for insurance coverage for contraception care.

More recently, changes in abortion care have also trickled into changes in birth control access and infertility treatment for families. When reproductive health care clinics offering abortions close, other  services are impacted, said Wells, who’s also a fellow with Physicians for Reproductive Health. The good news is technology is making online access to birth control options more accessible. Many options can be mailed and are often covered by insurance, she said.

Opill is now available, adding to the many other options, including condoms, spermicide, the ring, IUDs, implants, patches and cycle tracking.

How do I know what’s happening with access to birth control in my state?

There is no comprehensive, central location for all of this information, said Jennifer Driver, senior director of reproductive rights at SiX, an organization that works with elected officials after they win office. The federal Title X family planning websites have a lot of information and resources for patients, said Driver. The best way to find out what is happening with legislation is directly through the state legislator. On each website, you can see what bills are being introduced and which representatives may have brought it forth.

Local news coverage from trusted outlets may also break down what bills are impacting your reproductive health care. Experts caution against relying on social media for health information, given the sheer amount of misinformation and myths.

Do IUDs induce abortions?

No. The devices work by thickening the mucus along the uterine wall, making it difficult for sperm to migrate and meet with the egg, preventing fertilization.

“It’s a simple mechanism, but it really works,” said Lawson, who’s also the president of the National Medical Association. It prevents conception. They are 99.9% effective at preventing pregnancy.

What birth control is now available?

Condoms, spermicide, contraceptive sponges, apps to track your menstrual cycle, emergency contraception like Plan B, and most recently Opill, are all birth control options that do not require a prescription from a doctor.

Some hormonal contraceptives require either a prescription or insertion by a medical provider. Those include the ring, IUDs, implants, contraceptive injections, and birth control pills. Sterilization is also an option regardless of the gender of the patient.

“It’s really amazing that women have so many contraception options,” said Lawson. There is some slight variation in how well each works, she said. “There are options that our grandmothers and even mothers did not have. I hope women are empowered by that.”

It’s also important to make sure you feel comfortable with your provider, said Wells. You should feel free to ask questions about how each contraceptive option works and might impact your body.

A lot of birth control options are covered by insurance, and many clinics and health centers may offer free condoms. Some birth control pill companies offer discounts on their websites.

If you’re uninsured, many freestanding health clinics offer sliding scale payment options based on your household income and ability to pay, which could bring the price down.

How do I know what my best birth control option is?

It’s important to understand your medical history, said Wells. In person or online, your provider may ask about your history with high blood pressure, blood clots, and conditions like lupus. Those conditions may preclude the use of certain forms of contraception.

People should also consider their lifestyle and goals, she said. For example, the IUD requires a one-time insertion every handful of years depending on the types, whereas the pill requires patients to take them at the same time each day. Each option offers a different level of independence. The pill can be stopped at any time. The IUD and implant require an appointment with a provider to remove.

Complete Article HERE!

Lack of sex education in GOP states puts students at risk

An assortment of contraceptives such as Plan B and condoms provided by Planned Parenthood Generation Action at the Sex and Relationships photoshoot. Sex-ed is an important part of K-12 education, and the risk of losing the curriculum in schools can lead to an increase in unwanted teen pregnancies and STIs.

By Sunjae Lee

Although it may be a cliche, there is some truth to the trope ‘it takes a village to raise a child’ — whether it be through teachers, pediatricians, athletic coaches or politicians who create laws directly affecting youth. But in some states across the U.S., the adults in charge of youth policies are not doing their part in ensuring quality education for all.

According to an Associated Press article, GOP-led states are at risk of losing sex education curricula in their schools. This idea was amplified after the emergence of the “parents’ rights” movement, whose main concern is dismantling inclusive LGBTQ+ sex education. Republican leaders and parents are trying to ensure that it is the parents’ choice to allow their children to take part in any sex education.

So what can we expect in the absence of sex education at K-12 institutions if these policies are implemented?

Lack of sex education for all youth may lead to an increase in unwanted teen pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Since GOP state leaders tend to oppose abortion rights, minimizing unwanted pregnancy is crucial in these states to protect teens from potential physical, emotional and financial harms. In fact, teen birth rates are much higher in states that ban abortion and have minimal sex education curricula.

Moreover, the number of contracted sexually transmitted disease (STD) cases has risen again since the COVID-19 pandemic — reaching more than 2.5 million cases of syphilis, gonorrhea and chlamydia according to the CDC’s 2022 statistics.

GOP-led states are especially at higher risk; out of the top 10 states with the highest rate of STDs, eight are Republican-controlled states.

Many of the Republican voters who oppose mandatory sex education argue that it is the parents’ responsibility to determine what constitutes appropriate sex education for their children. But this begs the question: is sex education really taught at home?

According to OnePoll, one in five parents are not willing to have conversations about sexual matters with their kids at all. Even the parents who discuss sex education with their kids tend to avoid more complex topics, such as birth control and consent.

While sex education in schools is taught by qualified instructors, parents may not have the same level of professional expertise. Not only do they tend to avoid harder topics, but their own lack of education can lead to misinformation. For instance, older generations who are more socially conservative may be more likely to still believe in myths regarding sexual assault, such as victim-blaming for dressing or acting in a “sexually provoking way,” or believing that victims could have prevented it if they wanted to. A study from the International Society for the Study of Individual Differences’ journal proves that individuals with sexually conservative views are more likely to accept these myths.

Furthermore, teenagers are more likely to seek sexual information from peers and teachers than parents. We must keep these resources open, allowing for spaces where minors feel comfortable participating in honest outreach discussions.

The controversy surrounding sex education in public schools has been a longstanding issue, but it significantly escalated recently in GOP-led states due to opposition from parents and politicians who are reluctant to incorporate LGBTQ+ topics. The “Don’t Say Gay Bill” in Florida exemplifies the strong aversion for such discussions in politically conservative states. Given that the inclusion of LGBTQ+ sexual health in the curricula is the biggest concern among Republican-controlled states, should schools offer LGBTQ+ exclusive sex education to satisfy everyone?

The main reason why LGBTQ-inclusive sex education is important is that gender and sexually-marginalized youth are at a higher risk for sexual health issues such as STIs, sexual activity under the influence and dating violence.

LGBTQ+ youth are also far less likely to have open sex discussions with their parents. Even if they do, unless their parents are part of the community themselves, it is often difficult for kids to receive useful and accurate information specifically concerning their sexual health. It is important that schools protect LGBTQ+ youth by providing adequate education to prevent against poor health outcomes and lack of support within their homes.

Sex education is a shared responsibility between schools and parents. While schools need to provide children with quality health education, they also need a welcoming environment at home to seek answers. Instead, youth are struggling to find proper information in a world where open discussions about sex and sexual diversity are considered taboo. In each of our villages, adults and educators are responsible for ensuring safe environments and comprehensive education for all youth, including the LGBTQ+ community.

Since not everyone is privileged enough to receive quality sex education at home, K-12 schools provide necessary education for everyone regardless of socioeconomic status, family background and sexual orientation. When giving equal educational opportunities is the main function of primary and secondary schools, how is it acceptable to exclude one of the most important subjects?

Sex education is directly related to a person’s physical, emotional and social well-being. The World Health Organization defines sexual health as “a state of physical, emotional, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality.” Teaching adolescents about sexual health ensures a better quality of life overall.

According to a study from the Journal of Adolescent Health conducted with adolescent women, better sexual health is associated with better social integration, higher self-esteem, less substance use and lower self-reported depression. Another study from the Frontiers in Reproductive Health Journal suggests that among male adolescents, mental and reproductive health are intertwined; poor sexual health leads to poor mental health and vice versa.

Hence, comprehensive sex education can prevent many health issues and encourage healthy habits in various aspects of life. Minimizing sex education curricula means young people who are not fortunate enough to have sexually accepting and knowledgeable parents will have to learn on their own while risking their sexual health.

Conservatives’ irrational fear of healthy relationships being formed between members of same sex and non-binary gender identities, along with their false beliefs of comprehensive sex education encouraging reckless sex, are putting children at risk — including their own. What may hurt their kids is delaying essential education, as well as restricting exposure to healthy homosexual love or confident transgender people. The exclusion of proper sex education may leave people with irreversible consequences, such as unwanted pregnancy, HIV or sexual trauma.

Children should be set up for success, not put in a position where they have to rely on misinformation or the internet to be taught healthy sexual habits.

Complete Article HERE!

What doctors wish patients knew about getting a vasectomy

By Sara Berg, MS

When discussing reproductive health choices, one procedure has been gaining attention—especially since the fall of Roe v. Wade—for its effectiveness: the vasectomy. As individuals and couples explore long-term contraception options, vasectomies have emerged as a popular choice for those seeking a permanent solution—rates have increased by 26% in the past decade. With its relatively low risks and high success rates, this procedure is reshaping conversations about family planning.

The AMA’s What Doctors Wish Patients Knew™ series provides physicians with a platform to share what they want patients to understand about today’s health care headlines.

In this installment, three physicians took time to discuss what patients need to know about getting a vasectomy. These AMA members are:

  • Jason Jameson, MD, a urologist and chief of urology at the Phoenix Veterans Affairs Medical Center, who serves as a delegate for the American Urological Association in the AMA House of Delegates.
  • Amarnath Rambhatla, MD, a urologist at Henry Ford Health and director of men’s health at the Vattikuti Urology Institute in Detroit.
  • Moshe Wald, MD, a urologist at the University of Iowa Hospitals & Clinics and an associate professor in the department of urology at Carver College of Medicine in Iowa City.

Henry Ford Health and University of Iowa Hospitals & Clinics are members of the AMA Health System Program, which provides enterprise solutions to equip leadership, physicians and care teams with resources to help drive the future of medicine.

There are seasonal spikes in vasectomies

“We sometimes see seasonal spikes in vasectomies. We see it in March and then also in November and December before the end of the year,” Dr. Rambhatla said. “We think it spikes at the end of the year because everyone has met their deductible for the year.

“In March, it’s been loosely associated with March Madness, he added, noting “the running joke is that men get their vasectomy around the NCAA basketball tournament and ask their wives for permission to lay on the couch for four straight days so they can watch the basketball tournament.”

“The other interesting thing we’ve seen is with the Roe v. Wade reversal. There are studies showing an increase in Google trends, searches and consultations for vasectomies after that,” Dr. Rambhatla said. “So, it seems like some men are more inclined to be in control of their fertility status after that ruling.”

It’s a minor surgical procedure

“A vasectomy is a minor surgical procedure, which is aimed at eventually achieving permanent birth control,” said Dr. Wald, noting “the procedure is typically performed in a clinic setting under local anesthesia, which means injection of numbing medication into the area.

“However, in some cases, based on anatomy and on the patient’s preference it could also potentially be done in the operating room under sedation or general anesthesia,” he added. “But the vast majority are being performed  in the clinic under local anesthesia.”

“The procedure involves the surgical interruption of a tube called the vas deferens. The vas deferens is the tube that drains sperm from the testicle outwards and a man typically has two of them, one on each side,” Dr. Wald said. “So, the idea is to interrupt these tubes, and then allow enough time for  the sperm that at the time of the vasectomy was already beyond the vasectomy site to wash out.”

The procedure “usually takes about 20–30 minutes. One or two small cuts are made in the scrotum with a scalpel or no-scalpel instrument,” Dr. Jameson said, noting “the vas deferens are cut and tied or sealed with heat. The skin may or may not be closed with sutures.”

But “if the vas deferens are not easy to feel due to body characteristics—obesity, previous scarring—the procedure may be more challenging to perform,” Dr. Jameson noted.

It’s OK to drive yourself home

“Most of the time patients are OK to drive themselves home after the procedure. Occasionally I’ll have some patients who are a little nervous or anxious about getting a vasectomy,” said Dr. Rambhatla. “So, we can prescribe them medication to help calm down their anxiety for the procedure.

“In those situations, they need to have a driver with them because that medicine can alter their ability to drive,” he added. “Otherwise yes, you could drive yourself home.”

Don’t be nervous, it’s straightforward

Patients “should definitely relax. It’s a straightforward, easy procedure,” said Dr. Rambhatla. “The most common feedback I get from men after the procedure is: Oh, I thought it was going to be a lot worse than that.”

“Sometimes their friends will mess with them before the procedure and say it’s going to be a terrible experience and it is just good old fun,” he said. “But most of the time, people say it wasn’t so bad and they had nothing to worry about.”

Follow up requires a semen test

A vasectomy is “not immediately effective. If you can imagine a tube through which sperm is passing, the vasectomy is basically occluding that tube so sperm isn’t passing through anymore, but there’s still sperm on the other side of that tube we’ve occluded,” said Dr. Rambhatla. “And so, all that old sperm needs to be cleared out for men to become sterile.”

“We check a post-vasectomy semen analysis about three months after the procedure to make sure all that old sperm has been cleared out,” he said. “And sometimes some men may take longer, so it can take up to six months or so to clear out all the old sperm.”

Vasectomy is very effective

It is important to note that a “vasectomy would never provide a 100% guarantee. The only way to reach a 100% guarantee of no pregnancy is simply to avoid sexual intercourse altogether,” said Dr. Wald. “Even after a man gets a vasectomy and later gets a semen test that will show no sperm cells in the semen, there is still a very small risk for an unwanted pregnancy in the future.

“That risk is estimated in many studies at one in 2,000, which is, for example, much better than condoms. But it’s not zero and never will be,” he added. “That risk of roughly one in 2,000 by most series is after a man has a post-vasectomy semen test that showed no sperm. If somebody had unprotected sexual intercourse after a vasectomy before having such semen test at all, his chances for pregnancy could be close to 100%.”

This is meant to be permanent

“The best candidates for a vasectomy are couples who are done having kids or men who may be single and know that for sure they do not want any kids in the future,” said Dr. Rambhatla. That is “because we do consider it a permanent form of sterilization. It can be reversed, but really we want people going into it with the idea of permanent sterilization.”

Dr. Wald agreed, emphasizing that “If there’s any question about that, then I would advise against the vasectomy at that particular time.”

Vasectomies don’t always work

“There is a risk of failure. Even if done by an experienced physician, vasectomies could fail. Not necessarily due to surgical error—which is a possibility,” Dr. Wald said, noting “there have been multiple studies that showed the potential reconnection that can happen.”

“Sometimes there could be microscopic channels that can sprout from one end of the interrupted tube and at least in a transient manner allow for some sperm to sneak into the other side,” he said. “The risk varies a lot depending on if the patient had or did not have a semen test following the vasectomy that was negative for sperm. If he did that, his risk for such failure is very small.”

It may be covered by insurance

“Most private insurers cover some or all of the cost of vasectomies,” Dr. Jameson said. “For men without coverage, various self-pay options may be available in certain local facilities.”

“It’s a lot cheaper for insurance to pay for men to have a vasectomy than pay for them to have another child,” noted Dr. Rambhatla, emphasizing “most insurance companies are happy to cover a vasectomy.”

Vasectomy reversals are complicated

“Vasectomies are theoretically surgically reversible. The problem is that vasectomy reversals are a very different thing,” Dr. Wald said, noting that “vasectomy reversals are true surgery performed in the operating room. It is very expensive if not covered by insurance and it does not always work, even if done by an expert.”

The success of a vasectomy reversal “depends on various factors such as how long it’s been since the vasectomy, what your fertility status was prior to the vasectomy and what your partner’s fertility status is,” said Dr. Rambhatla. “Because sometimes we see men with new partners who may have different fertility potential than their previous partner or now their same partner is older, and her fertility potential has changed.”

“And the closer you are to the vasectomy period, the better success rates with the reversal,” he said. “Generally, if this is done within 10 years, there’s a good chance that we can get sperm back in the ejaculate. But sperm in the ejaculate doesn’t necessarily translate to a pregnancy.”

There is a risk of bleeding

“From the surgical standpoint, this is a fairly small procedure, so the risks are not to the magnitude of anything life threatening, but there are certainly risks that are worth mentioning,” Dr. Wald said. “There are the most obvious risks of bleeding and infection. Bleeding, if it happens, is not even close to being anything life threatening.

“Such bleeding happens not externally, but rather internally into the scrotal sac and it could cause bruising, swelling and patient discomfort, and it can take a few weeks to gradually absorb,” he added. “It typically involves the surgical wound or the skin, but sometimes can be deeper and even involve the testicle. These are almost always managed by antibiotics, but it’s a risk.”

“The risk of bleeding with vasectomy increases with blood pressure,” Dr. Jameson said. That’s why it is important to have blood pressure controlled before getting a vasectomy.

Watch out for abnormal pain

“What is not that obvious is the risk of chronic testicular pain. I’m not referring to the obvious post-procedural pain, but a chronic condition that can last months, years or even be there for life,” Dr. Wald said.

According to the American Urological Association, about 1% to 2% of men may experience ongoing pain or discomfort, explained Dr. Jameson. The pain is often treated with anti-inflammatory medications such as ibuprofen.

“This chronic type of pain is a treatable condition, but in some men such treatment could involve surgery that could be bigger in its magnitude than the original vasectomy,” Dr. Wald said.

Men can develop antibodies to sperm

“Not all, but most men who undergo a vasectomy do develop antibodies to sperm. This is because sperm is typically separated from the immune system,” Dr. Wald said. “However, a vasectomy is one of the most common causes where sperm is exposed to blood  and the immune system, and that could lead to the formation of anti-sperm antibodies.”

“This is not something that is posing a general health concern and patients will not feel it,” he said. “But the problem is that if somebody does seek fertility later in life and undergoes a vasectomy reversal, even if the vasectomy reversal works, these antibodies do not go away and can coat sperm, slow sperm down and impair its function.”

It should not affect sex

“A vasectomy does not change sexual function. It does not protect against sexually transmitted infections,” said Dr. Rambhatla. “It’s simply a way to prevent sperm from coming out in the ejaculate.”

Additionally, Dr. Jameson noted, according to the Urological Care Foundation, that a vasectomy should also not cause any erection problems—ejaculations and orgasms should feel the same. And while there is no sperm, the amount of semen does not decrease more than 5%.

Avoid extensive activity

“Typically, if the procedure is done towards the end of the week, then the patient can simply take a long weekend and then plan to go back to work Monday,” Dr. Wald said. “It’s not something that requires you to be in bed, but definitely avoid extensive physical activity.”

That means “no heavy lifting, running. Any gym type activities should be refrained from,” said Dr. Rambhatla, noting that “walking is OK. Just no strenuous activity.”

Additionally, “men with more activity and heavy lifting at work may need more time off as you should avoid heavy lifting for a week,” Dr. Jameson said.

Address pain control

“In terms of pain control, usually most people do well with alternating between Tylenol and ibuprofen as needed,” said Dr. Rambhatla, adding that icing for the first couple days also helps.

Patients can “resume sexual activity once the pain and swelling have resolved,” he explained.

Wear snug underwear and ice area

After a vasectomy, it is common to have swelling and minor pain in the scrotum for a few days, Dr. Jameson said, noting that “wearing snug underwear or a jockstrap can help ease discomfort and support the area.”

Additionally, “patients are typically asked to wear a jock strap with a pretty bulky dressing for 48 hours, and also to ice the area intermittently for 48 hours,” Dr. Wald said.

There are other forms of contraception

“Other birth control methods include condoms or birth control pills for females,” Dr. Jameson said, noting “both of these methods are effective but must be consistently used, and the one-time cost of a vasectomy may be cheaper over time than the cost of other birth control methods.”

Additionally, “tubal ligation in females is another surgical option for birth control and is performed by gynecologists,” he said.

Complete Article HERE!

When Makeup Sex Isn’t a Good Idea

By Myisha Battle

A client who is new to dating, sex, and relationships recently asked me “Is makeup sex healthy?” The person, in their late 20’s, has been dating someone seriously for the first time. Things were progressing slowly sexually with his girlfriend, so their question about makeup sex struck me as a great one to ask before ever having the experience firsthand.

We discussed the pros and cons of having an argument that ended with sex, and I explained what I’ve seen as a sex coach. On one hand, it can feel really good to reconnect with a partner after a challenging discussion or verbal disagreement. Sex can be the ultimate display that the fight is over, allowing both partners to move on without any lingering ill will towards each other. On the other hand, makeup sex could be masking deeper issues in the relationship if it’s an ongoing strategy used to resolve conflict in the relationship.

Makeup sex feels like somewhat of a cultural phenomenon. We know it happens, and maybe it’s even happened in our own relationships. But, is it a good thing or something that should be avoided at all costs?

A quick scroll on TikTok reveals a wide range of opinions on the subject. Some people strongly advise against it as it could reinforce bad behavior from your partner. Many posts lean more towards the commonly held belief that makeup sex is a great way to bond after an argument. Other posts suggest that there is something qualitatively different about makeup sex, that includes a heightened state of emotions that you just can’t get to without a fight beforehand. And it’s true that people who see makeup sex as more intense feel a carryover effect from their fight in the sexual experience that follows. This is called “excitation transfer,” which is when you are physiologically aroused by one thing and it transfers over to other areas of your life.

But there’s more to makeup sex than this. A 2020 study of 107 newlywed couples shed some light on what the benefits of makeup sex really are and how sexual quality is impacted by conflict. The study showed that when sex occurred after a flight, it had a greater impact on how people felt about the relationship by reducing the negative effects of conflict. This seems to coincide with the view that makeup sex is a way to feel closer to their partner. What’s surprising is that the study also showed that participants reported that the quality of sex after a fight was actually worse than the sex that occurred without a fight. So even though the sex itself wasn’t perceived as great, there were longer term emotional benefits for the relationship. This helps debunk the assumption that makeup sex is somehow just better than other sex. It also shows the real benefits of sexual connection after healthy conflict.

Where makeup sex gets tricky, though, is when it is used as the sole means for conflict resolution. Given that sex is one of the many ways we bond, it can be seen as an easier way to shift from negative emotions that are stirred up in a flight. But those negative emotions may still be there even after you have sex if you don’t take the time to process them yourself and with your partner. I’ve worked with couples where this dynamic is present and it can become very toxic over time. Feelings pile up that only get relieved through sex, which isn’t necessarily all that satisfying or pleasurable for one or both parties. There can be an aversion to sex for this reason and then feelings have nowhere else to go. This can cause ongoing tension at the least or periodic blow up fights at worst. As a result, people usually have to work with a couple’s therapist to develop healthy conflict resolution skills and be better communicators in general.

There is also a risk of having the perception that the relationship is on solid ground when it isn’t. I’ve heard from people that they have sex regularly, but feel stuck when it comes to day-to-day, non-sexual intimacy with their partner. When sex is the de-facto way to express emotions—joy, sadness, anger, or grief—there can be a lack of emotional closeness in the relationship. Makeup sex could be one way to avoid connecting with each other more deeply, resulting in what looks on the surface like a healthy relationship but is actually one without true intimacy.

Intimacy isn’t just the sex you have with your partner. It’s the ability to recognize the need for healthy conflict and repair. If you are in a healthy relationship where conflicts come up and are worked through, makeup sex can make you feel closer to each other. It’s a way to deepen the intimate connection that’s already there because you made it through something hard together. But it can’t— and shouldn’t—be the only way we connect with our partners. It’s just the cherry on top.

Complete Article HERE!

I’m not surprised women prioritise sleep over orgasms

— A survey has found that more than 85 per cent of women would choose a good night’s sleep over having an orgasm. I understand why

By

My friends and I have a game that we like to call “Eight Hours’ Sleep Or…” It’s not a particularly imaginative name and certainly won’t keep the creators of Pictionary or Scrabble up at night, but it’s as good a way as any to while away the spare two and a half minutes we tend to catch between work and parenting.

The idea of the game is to find something you would rather have than eight hours’ sleep a night. It goes something like this:

“Eight hours’ sleep or being best friends with Taylor Swift?”

“Eight hours’ sleep.”

“Eight hours’ sleep or being pursued by Brad Pitt?”

“Eight hours’ sleep.”

“Eight hours’ sleep or an end to mansplaining?’

“Eight hours’ sleep.”

“Eight hours’ sleep or being able to eat all the cheese without any negative impact on your health?”

“Eight hours’ sleep.”

“Eight hours’ sleep or an unlimited supply of confidence and money?”

“Eight hours’ sleep.”

And so on and so forth until you realise that nothing on God’s Earth will ever trump the idea of eight uninterrupted hours of sleep, of waking up feeling rested, recovered and raring to go into the day ahead.

It has been a relief, then, to discover that my group of friends and I are not alone. A major survey of bedroom habits by Good Housekeeping magazine has found that more than 85 per cent of women would choose a good night’s sleep over having an orgasm. Only 52 per cent of men feel the same way, perhaps because of the “gender sleep gap” –  yes, there is such a thing! – with 61 per cent of women saying their sleep quality varied, compared with 53 per cent of men.

Anyway, I think what we can all take from this is that sleep is very, very hard to come by these days. Stress, hormones, the lure of sitting up late at night scrolling through a little screen that sits in the palm of your hand and contains all of the horrors of the world… and then there’s the fact that sleeplessness has become a sort of status symbol, a way of telling people to back the hell off and go easy on you without actually having to tell people to back the hell off and go easy on you.

Saying “I’m tired” over and over and again is the most wonderfully passive-aggressive way of signifying you are busy and pressurised and do not have time for the trifling trivialities everyone seems to be bringing to your doorstep. We say we want eight hours’ sleep, but do we really? If we had eight hours’ sleep a night, then what would our excuse be?

Personally, I’m done with being sleepless in south London. It’s so boring talking about how tired I am all the time, such a waste of energy in itself. And in the past year, I have realised how counter-productive my obsession with sleeplessness is. The more I worry about sleep, the less I actually sleep.

I realised this last spring, when I spent a couple of hundred quid on an Oura ring, which is a sleep tracker that wellbeing experts swear by. Every night, I went to bed in it, and got annoyed by the flashing red and green lights that seemed to emanate from it in the dark. Every morning, I woke up and looked with horror upon the graphs that told me how exhausted I was, and what this might mean for my long-term health (nothing good). Eventually I realised that the presence of the tracker was in itself having a detrimental effect on my sleep. It was fuelling my insomnia, so I took it off, and decided to take radical steps to actually prioritise sleep, as opposed to just talking about the lack of it in my life.

Now, I devote the evening to sleep. I have sacrificed what remained of a social life for it. I don’t go out. I refuse all dinner invitations, choosing instead to eat early with my 10-year-old. I am in bed before her, my phone switched off and on charge, a good book in my hands as I get comfortable in my 200-thread-count Egyptian cotton linen. My friends know that if they text me after 8pm, they are unlikely to get an answer until the next morning. I spend at least 90 minutes reading, and have usually drifted off by 11pm.

I have rules: no more than one coffee a day, and never later than 11am; if I wake in the middle of the night, reading for 15 minutes is a much more effective tool than simply closing my eyes and trying to get back to sleep; my own duvet is essential, as I like to turn it round again and again to find the cool side; and if my husband starts snoring he is immediately out and into the spare room. 

This may seem draconian, but I don’t care. Because nothing – and I mean nothing – is more important than a decent night’s sleep.

Indeed, now I am in my 40s and in menopause, I can see that it is the most important thing of all when it comes to emotional well-being. You can go on anti-depressants, you can sign up for therapy, you can do as much exercise as you want: but if you are not prioritising rest, the chances are you will not start to feel better. It doesn’t have to be eight hours. But in my experience, anything below six and you are going to struggle. You are going to be cranky, short-tempered and extra sensitive. Any resilience you have will be gone by mid-morning. There will likely be tears. This is nothing to be ashamed of: it’s just simple, human biology.

Of course, I suspect many women would sleep much easier if they knew they lived in a world where they were entitled to both eight hours’ kip a night and an orgasm. But that’s another column entirely, and until that moment comes (pardon the pun), you’ll find me of an evening tucked up in bed in my nightie, sipping on a nice mug of Ovaltine.

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