Category: Panromantic

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The Woman in an Open Marriage With a Gay Man

— New York Magazine’s “Sex Diaries” series asks anonymous city dwellers to record a week in their sex lives — with comic, tragic, often sexy, and always revealing results. The column, which began in 2007, is the basis of a new docuseries on HBO.

As told to

This week, a landscape architect goes on a few questionable dates and wonders how to zhuzh up her sex life: 45, married, New York.

DAY ONE

6:20 a.m. Our daughter wanders into our room for morning cuddles. My husband, Howie, snuggles with her for a little while. I get up and put coffee on.

7:15 a.m. Our son is now awake. We all have breakfast — cereal and waffles. I pack the kids’ backpacks and Howie takes them to elementary school.

9:30 a.m. Finally, I have a moment to myself and check my phone. Howie and I are in an open marriage. We don’t have a sexual relationship — he mostly sleeps with gay men, and I’m bisexual. We met at a gay bar about eight years ago and became the best of friends. We got pregnant via IVF and then decided to get married and co-parent together because we love each other and wanted to be a family unit. We just outsource our sex lives!

Anyway, Thea, a woman I met on Hinge, has texted about a drink tomorrow night. I have to check my schedule with Howie, so I don’t write back.

2 p.m. I jump in my car and head to the Hamptons for a meeting with a new client. I’m a landscape architect and do projects in the Hamptons and upstate New York, so I’m on the road a lot. On the way, I listen to music — a hip-hop playlist Howie made for me.

6 p.m. The meeting went well. I think they’re going to hire me. I start the drive back to the city.

9 p.m. By the time I get home, the entire house is asleep, including Howie, so I get on the couch and do some flirting on the apps. I confirm a drink with Thea for tomorrow and tell a guy named Paulo that I’d be down for a coffee the next day.

9:30 p.m. It occurs to me that I haven’t had really great sex with anyone in months. My last hookup was with a woman visiting for a week from London. We got drunk on spicy margaritas and went crazy on each other at her hotel room. I need something like that soon and hope Thea or Paulo are good options.

DAY TWO

8 a.m. Get the kids ready for school by myself. Howie had an early meeting. He’s a lawyer. Since we’re in our mid-40s, he’s finally in a position of power and has slightly better hours, but he works for a pretty conservative firm so he’s tight-lipped about our lifestyle.

1 p.m. Drafting a proposal for the Hamptons client. I finally hit “send” and then go to the gym.

3 p.m. From the treadmill, I suggest a few date spots to Thea. She’s younger and is “an artist,” though it’s unclear from her dating profile what that means. I hope she’s not a total hipster or party girl.

6 p.m. Kiss the kids goodnight. Tell Howie to wish me luck and leave the apartment. It’s kind of like we’re roommates — when he knows I’m going on a date, he’s excited for me. There’s no weirdness unless one of us leaves the other with a ton of parenting or chores.

7 p.m. At some bar in Bushwick to meet Thea. I get a drink and check my emails.

7:15 p.m. Thea walks in. She’s adorable. Big smile, beautiful skin, long hair. I’m so glad she’s not a gritty hipster. I’m just not attracted to dirty hair and nose piercings. But she is very young, in her late 20s, which surprises me. I have no idea how I missed that on her dating profile. I kind of feel like her mother.

9 p.m. So far, it’s a good date. I’m attracted to her. We’ve had two drinks each, and we decide to move next door and get some food.

9:30 p.m. We’re eating some overpriced artisanal pizza. When we’re finished, I pay, and we decide to call our Ubers home. We start making out while we wait. It’s wonderful. She’s tender and affectionate. I’m into it, but I decide we can hang out another time and see where things go. Not tonight, I’m getting tired.

10:15 p.m. Crawl into bed. I tell Howie I had fun but I wasn’t super into her. She was a little boring if I’m being honest.

DAY THREE

6 a.m. Daughter is up. I’m hungover. Since Howie did the heavy lifting last night, I handle the morning routine.

8:30 a.m. Drop off the kids. Stop at a café for my second coffee of the morning.

12:30 p.m. I’m visiting a client in Cobble Hill. She’s not happy with a job I did for her last summer, so I’m dreading it.

1:30 p.m. Leave the meeting in a bad mood. Still have a hangover. Sometimes I wonder if this lifestyle is sustainable for Howie and me. He barely goes out anymore because he says he’s content with our home life and has plenty of porn to jerk off to. We’re older now, and I wonder if I’m ready to slow down my sex life too. It feels like I’m at a crossroads.

4 p.m. A long afternoon of invoicing and paperwork.

6 p.m. Head to a drinks event with a hotel brand that always hires me for big jobs. I’m really not looking forward to it, but I can’t blow it off.

7 p.m. On the subway there, Paulo texts about hanging out tonight. I tell him now’s not a good time but maybe at the end of the week. I also see a text from Thea, but I ignore it.

9 p.m. Showed face and schmoozed the hotel people. Now I’m on the train home.

10:30 p.m. I take out my vibrator while pretending to take a shower. Sitting on the bathroom floor, I press it against my underwear, close my eyes, and try to imagine fucking Thea. My mind switches channels and instead, I’m on my stomach, getting railed by an unknown man with a huge cock while I go down on some woman. I come in about 60 seconds. Then I take a shower for real.

DAY FOUR

6 a.m. Up with the kids since Howie handled bedtime.

10:30 a.m. At a client’s house, working. All of my clients are wealthy, but this one is spectacularly wealthy and spectacularly rude. But she pays very well and on time, so I don’t want to bite the hand that feeds me. She truly is a bitch, though.

4:30 p.m. I pick up the kids from their after-school programs and we head home. Howie is going to a work party tonight, so I want to get everyone fed before he takes off.

5 p.m. Start making chicken tortilla soup. I love cooking. I always have a glass of wine while I cook. In these moments, I’m 100 percent satisfied with my life and don’t need anything more.

6 p.m. Everyone eats, then the kids and I send Howie off. He looks so handsome. I feel bad for him at these work parties. He says it’s no big deal hiding his identity, but I wish he’d be more open about his true self. But it’s his business, not mine.

9 p.m. I’m on the couch texting Paulo. He obviously wants to sext. He literally said, “What are you wearing?” So corny.

I write back, “Describe your cock for me?” He asks if I want a picture. I do. He sends one and it’s big, veiny, and kind of scary — but also beautiful in a way. I wonder if it’s his real dick.

He asks if I want to FaceTime. I say no, then put the phone down and watch TV. Howie could be home at any moment, and I don’t want him walking in on me fingering myself to a stranger on the phone. It would just be too embarrassing.

DAY FIVE

7:30 a.m. Howie did the morning shift. Yay. I head to a meeting with my accountant.

Noon: Lunch with my sister, who lives near the accountant. She knows about my lifestyle and doesn’t judge. She’s in a sexless, dull marriage and says she often feels stuck in “Blahsville.” I wish she could just open things up like us, but she says she’s not interested in sex so an open marriage doesn’t appeal to her. That may be true, but it makes me wonder how her husband is getting off. I bet he cheats on her, but I’d never say that out loud.

3 p.m. Paulo wants to meet up. I did like the size and strength of his cock. From our chats, he seems potentially gross, but I’m intrigued. I suggest tomorrow night.

7 p.m. We have family dinner at a restaurant. It’s very fun. My kids are so precious. Howie and I are pretty open with them about our unconventional marriage. I mean, we tell them what their brains can handle, things like “There are lots of different ways to be married. We do it our way, and it’s the best way for us!” I’ll explain the details when they’re older, but I’m not worried about it.

DAY SIX

6 a.m. It’s the weekend! Which means we still wake up at the crack of dawn …

Noon: A morning of soccer and karate classes.

3 p.m. Our kids watch a movie while Howie and I decide what to do tonight. We always get a sitter on Saturdays. Howie plans to meet up with his best friend, who is gay and married and about to have his first child. I tell Howie I might have a drink with Paulo, who has a huge cock and might be a bit sketchy. We both laugh. Howie makes me laugh like no one else can.

7:30 p.m. Paulo picked a cool bar in Tribeca. I walk in a bit late and he’s there. He looks nothing like his dating-app photos. He’s much shorter, fatter, and scuzzier in real life. It’s like night and day. I feel very annoyed by this. Like, come on, dude, do better.

8:30 p.m. He wants to go fuck right away. He suggests the bathroom of the bar and then a hotel room where he’s apparently “a VIP.” Ick! He’s neither charming nor seductive, so after one drink, I hop on a Citi Bike and ride all the way home. I block him the minute I dock the bike.

9 p.m. Sent the sitter home early and took a shower. Had to wash off the ick.

DAY SEVEN

6:30 a.m. Drinking my first cup of coffee. I’m feeling a little blah. I can’t seem to meet someone sexy and cool in real life, my husband is gay, and I’m getting older. Ugh, whatever, just the morning blues, I guess.

12:30 p.m. Take the kids to a birthday party. The mom hosting it is newly divorced and beautiful. She has a masculine edge, and I’m very attracted to her but I never know how to hit on other moms. It’s tricky since it’s in my kids’ orbit.

1 p.m. The birthday mom says something like “Remember when Sundays were all about binge-watching TV and having sex all day?” We both laugh and get pulled away by our kids, but I consider this an interesting sign …

3 p.m. Before I leave the party, she gives me her cell. I feel a vibe but not sure what to make of it. Murky territory.

8:30 p.m. After saying goodnight to the kids, I text the birthday mom to thank her for the party. She writes back, “We should get a drink sometime.” I make myself wait 20 minutes before writing back: “I’d love that.”

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I’m a Sex Coach in a Monogamish Relationship

— Here’s How I Handle the Fear and Jealousy That Can Come With Non-Monogamy

By Quean Mo

Even if you know wholeheartedly that you want to be non-monogamous, actually engaging in that relationship structure can elicit a variety of complex emotions. At the same time that you feel desire, you might also feel fear and jealousy—and I’ve experienced this firsthand, as both a person in a monogamish relationship (a form of non-monogamy that allows for agreed-upon sex acts outside of an otherwise monogamous relationship) and a sex coach who works with clients looking to navigate the complexities of such relationships.

When my husband James and I first got together eight years ago, it was in a monogamous relationship. But after we built a loving, trusting partnership—one that alleviated the emotional baggage I carried from a prior abusive relationship—I found that I was able to access parts of myself that I’d previously closed off. I discovered that I was a cuckquean (a woman who is aroused by her partner having an affair with another woman) and that I wanted to open up our relationship.

The idea of James sleeping with other women drove me mad with jealousy, and yet that jealousy felt so intensely good. The best way to describe this experience is that, because I felt emotionally secure within my relationship, I could sit in the fiery sensation that jealousy conjures without burning alive; it warmed and exhilarated me rather than consuming me.

The prospect of actually engaging in this fantasy, however, sparked loud, conflicting voices in my head. One voice promised that this lifestyle would make our relationship all the more fulfilling, while the other warned of the opposite. I was fighting with myself, but one feeling remained consistent: I loved James, and I also wanted to explore pleasure beyond ourselves.

Over the past four-plus years together, we’ve done just that, carefully weighing the pros and cons of non-monogamy and crafting a version of it that suits us both. The process has been a gateway to personal and relationship growth and enhanced pleasure. But it certainly hasn’t always been easy or linear.

Mainstream society tends to reinforce a primarily monogamous relationship structure and offers little guidance on anything outside of it, much less the nuanced feelings that non-monogamy can spark.

I’ve noticed non-monogamy becoming increasingly popular, but even so, mainstream society tends to reinforce a primarily monogamous relationship structure that offers little guidance on anything outside of that, much less the nuanced feelings that non-monogamy can spark. Below, I share how I’ve learned to navigate the fear and jealousy that can arise with non-monogamy and the advice I offer clients who aim to do the same.

5 tips to manage fear and jealousy when embracing non-monogamy with a partner

1. Discuss both the upsides of non-monogamy and of your individual relationship

Clear communication is a cornerstone of any healthy relationship, but it is especially important when you’re aiming to open up a relationship or fundamentally change its structure. By talking candidly about why you have the desire for a particular version of non-monogamy or a monogamish relationship with a partner, you also have the chance to address the what-ifs, which can help quell fears that arise naturally because of what is still unknown.

Here are a few questions that my husband and I considered when we discussed opening our relationship:

  • What sides of non-monogamy interested me? And why?
  • Was he interested in a monogamish relationship? If so, why?
  • What were our biggest fears when it came to embracing non-monogamy?
  • What role would each of us play?
  • What boundaries needed to be established?

In figuring out how you and a partner could both stand to benefit from non-monogamy, it’s equally important to reiterate what you value in the relationship you share with each other, according to sex and intimacy coach Rebekah Beneteau. “Maybe you two nest and co-parent really well together, but sexually you’re both dominant,” she says. “You may then want to get that need met somewhere else, while still recognizing that you have these other terrific connection points.”

The clear recognition that your current monogamous relationship has real value can help mitigate some of the natural fear and jealousy that can come with inviting others into the fold.

2. Define how you’ll each continue to be included in each other’s pleasure

When my husband and I were first embracing non-monogamy, I felt jealousy at the realization that I would no longer be the singular or even primary source of his sexual pleasure.

Beneteau defines this type of jealousy with an equation: turn-on + exclusion. “You don’t get jealous if your husband is doing their taxes with someone else,” she says, of exclusion without the turn-on.

Because our version of non-monogamy would involve sex acts with others, the antidote to jealousy was in figuring out how we could reduce feelings of exclusion and continue to be included in each other’s pleasure, both sexually and otherwise. This involved adopting the fundamental understanding that love and sex aren’t innately or always connected, and setting clear boundaries around our sexual relationships with others, so each of us felt included in those decisions.

3. Use self-reflection to examine the true source of your fears around non-monogamy

Typically, pain and fear are survival mechanisms that spring from perceived threat. The important thing to note, though, is that many of our perceptions of threat in relationships aren’t rooted in actual danger so much as they are in societal conditioning around monogamy—that “real” love is monogamous love, that we should search for “the one,” or that we should be able to have all our needs met by one person.

Many of our perceptions of threat in relationships aren’t rooted in actual danger so much as they are in societal conditioning around monogamy.

By taking “an intellectual look at the fears we feel [surrounding non-monogamy],” or following them with an objective lens, we can determine whether they’re actually true to us or are just stemming from the monogamous narratives that have been imparted onto us (and no longer serve us), says sociologist and relationship consultant Elisabeth “Eli” Scheff, PhD.

To do that, try implementing a self-reflection practice, such as journaling, to track your fears to their cores, and decide whether or not they have real merit. Understanding that the root of my fears around non-monogamy was in the societal narratives I once harbored has helped liberate me from those stories—and it could do the same for you.

4. Take small steps toward non-monogamy

Trial and error can feel intimidating when it comes to transitioning a monogamous relationship into a non-monogamous one—which is why gradual steps are key to success. Here are a few exercises from my personal tool kit to help you test the waters when you’re managing feelings of fear and jealousy:

  1. People-watch with your partner with the intention of sharing whom you find attractive.
  2. Have an ethical porn date during which you watch porn and play together or separately (be it in different rooms or through mutual masturbation).
  3. Explore online dating apps, either as a couple or separately. Start by chatting only, increasing engagement as you both see fit.

These items are meant to be entry-level actions you can take, with low emotional risk, to gauge how each of you feel when your partner is thinking about or engaging with someone else. The point is to communicate at every stage what works and what doesn’t so you can either continue forward or recalibrate accordingly. This way, you don’t risk accidentally pushing things too far too quickly in a way that leaves one or both partners feeling hurt.

5. Remember that *you* are always your primary partner

Being your own primary partner means “you are not willing to lose yourself for the sake of any relationship, and that anybody coming into your space just has the power to enhance it and bring something juicy, new, and fun,” says Beneteau.

What I love about this concept is that it shifts the focus from feelings of fear and potential inadequacy to individual empowerment.

The structure of your relationship has less to do with the success of it than the quality of the relationship itself.

When my husband and I transitioned from monogamous to monogamish, I navigated some frustration. I could feel that this was the right path for me, and yet, I was terrified of the consequences. What I learned, however, is what you bring to a relationship—trust, honesty, communication, love, respect—will best determine the longevity of that partnership and how satisfied you are within it (not whether it’s monogamous or non-monogamous or somewhere in-between).

As a result, it’s especially important to tend to your relationship with yourself if you find that you’re facing fear and jealousy in the pursuit of non-monogamy. “The relationship you have with yourself is foundational in how you move through the world,” says Beneteau.

One way to strengthen that relationship to self is to set your own pleasure as your compass. By reflecting on your desires for non-monogamy and following the path that you believe will bring you the most pleasure—even in the face of your fears—you’ll move toward your authentic self and a more fulfilling relationship, too. The journey will likely involve ample communication and trial-and-error, but remembering that it’s ultimately all in the name of your pleasure can help mitigate emotional setbacks and make it that much more rewarding in the end.

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What Does It Mean To Be Panromantic?

By Stephanie Barnes

For some people, gender plays an important role when it comes to choosing romantic partners, but this isn’t the case for people who are panromantic. Below, we dive into what it means to be panromantic, how it relates to pansexuality and other identities, and more.

What does it mean to be panromantic?

The prefix pan- in panromantic means “all,” “completely,” or “involving all.” That said, being panromantic means you experience romantic attraction or deep emotional connection, affection, or love for people of all genders. A panromantic person will typically be attracted to others regardless of sex or gender.

“Of course, this doesn’t imply that panromantic people are romantically attracted to just about everyone out there. It’s just that gender is the last thing that comes to their mind [when it comes to] whether or not they develop feelings for someone,” says Dainis Graveris, a sex educator and founder of Sexual Alpha. “No one is off the table when it comes to who they’re romantically attracted to.”

He adds that people of any gender can be panromantic, and they can be romantically attracted to cis and trans folks, as well as nonbinary, gender fluid, genderqueer, and other gender-nonconforming individuals.

Additionally, Graveris notes it’s important to differentiate between the “panromantic” and “pansexual” terms. In particular, the former is a type of romantic attraction, while the latter is a type of sexual attraction. (We’ll dive more into that later.)

Understanding the different types of attraction.

Through the lens of the Split Attraction Model, attraction comes in many forms, including sexual and romantic. By discerning among them, we can better explore, direct, and enjoy our various interactions with people, says Ley Cray, Ph.D., director of LGBTQIA+ programming at virtual mental health clinic Charlie Health.

So, what’s the difference between sexual attraction and romantic attraction? Sexual attraction is perhaps the easiest to explain, says Cray: You see someone, and you experience a psychological and biological response indicating to you that you’d like to engage in sexual activity with that someone. On the other hand, romantic attraction is a little harder to explain, since the widespread notion of romance we see today is a cultural construct—and in the context of human history, a relatively recent one.

“Historically, the concept has connections to the notion of courtship and at bare minimum seems to involve some desire to connect on an emotional level, with some variety of intimacy and reciprocal commitment. Some might argue that the concept even presupposes some sense of romanticizing—that is, idealizing—the person you’re attracted to,” Cray explains.

It’s important to note that not all sexual attractions are romantic attractions and not all romantic interests are coupled with a sexual attraction.

“Some folks might identify as asexual but still experience romantic attraction to folks regardless of their gender identity,” adds sex and relationship coach Azaria Menezes. “Someone who might identify as heterosexual may feel romantic attraction toward others regardless of their gender identity. Being panromantic can apply to many sexual identities.”

Signs you may be panromantic:

1. You can imagine yourself being romantically interested in someone of any gender.

You are interested in or open to love and emotional connection with people and do not experience that feeling as limited to just one or two genders. “Panromantic means that a romantic attraction/interest is possible regardless of the partner’s gender,” sexologist Carol Queen, Ph.D., says. This includes trans, nonbinary, agender, and other folks across the gender spectrum, she adds.

2. You have messy or complicated feelings toward folks of varying genders.

Like with any romantic or sexual orientation, Graveris says pan feelings can be confusing—especially if you’ve grown up in a traditional binary household. And now you’re questioning yourself, perhaps because you’re noticing romantic feelings for people of more genders than you have in the past. Understand that these feelings are entirely valid. Once you start exploring your feelings, connections, and desires for people regardless of gender, you’ll likely get some clarity over the complicated feelings.

3. When you think about yourself in a long-term relationship, the person’s gender doesn’t really matter to you.

Visualizing having a long-term partnership with someone of any gender can be a good sign that you’re panromantic. That person’s gender is the least of your concerns; what matters most to you is the formed connection and feelings you have for them, Graveris says.

4. You’ve fantasized about having more than one romantic partner.

“Of course, this doesn’t apply to all panromantic folks. However, a good number of panromantics feel that dating people of different genders at the same time will make it easier for them to express their identity,” Graveris says. He emphasizes, though, that some panromantic people do choose to be in monogamous relationships, and this doesn’t mean they’re not panromantic.

5. Other labels don’t feel right.

Labels like heterosexual, bisexual, gay, or lesbian may feel too limiting or not fully accurate for you, Queen adds. Panromanticism is related to other romantic and sexual identities, but something about the label and meaning behind the word “panromantic” just speaks to you.

“Distinguishing between [panromantic and other orientations] often takes some self-scrutiny and thinking about romantic and relationship possibilities since most of us haven’t had romantic relationships with people all over the gender spectrum,” she notes but emphasizes: “Our sexual and romantic orientation isn’t only based on experience—it can be based on desire or openness to experience.”

Panromantic vs. pansexual.

While panromantic is specifically a romantic orientation, pansexual also notes a person’s sexual orientation. According to Queen, for many people, their sexual orientation and interests are the same as their romantic orientation and interests, but this isn’t always the case.

“So, these two terms define a pan- outlook both romantically (could fall in love with and/or feel romantic toward partner/s of any gender and gender identity) and sexually (could desire and/or have sex with partner/s of any gender and gender identity),” she explains, adding that “lots of pansexual people are also likely to be panromantic.”

However, she says it’s possible to be aromantic and pansexual, for example; it is possible to be panromantic and asexual; it’s possible to be pansexual and only have romantic feelings for folks of specific identities rather than feeling potentially romantic about people across the board. These two orientations—sexual and romantic—are not the same thing, and they don’t always match up.

“In thinking about how to distinguish—consider that it is possible to want sex with someone you would not feel love or a romantic vibe with, and it is possible to want the feelings of romance with someone you aren’t into sexually,” she explains. “If you find these two sexual/emotional spaces are not just activated by specific people but many/all kinds of people, you are in the ‘pan-‘ zone, but then the question is fundamentally: sexual desire, romantic connection, or possibly both?”

Dating as a panromantic.

Navigating the dating and sex game with the most ease and success as a panromantic starts by figuring out what you want and being comfortable with the label that you choose to identify with, Graveris says.

“Don’t be afraid to explore your romantic orientation and recognize your feelings. All these efforts give you a deeper understanding of your whole self,” he explains. “Also, take the time to learn about different types of attraction as well as sexuality and gender terms and labels. While it can be overwhelming initially, it’s an essential first step. The label you choose helps you not only understand your own feelings but also connect with other people who express the same feelings.”

And as with any relationship, it’s important to communicate to your partners or potential dates about exactly who you are and how you feel attraction. Communicating with your family and friends can also be helpful. For some people, it may help to “come out” as panromantic to the people you hold close and dear in your life, who can offer support as you explore your identity.

You can come out to your loved ones in many ways, depending on what feels the most comfortable for you. “Some people gather their family and friends or have one-on-one conversations to tell them they’re panromantic. Others choose to make it ‘official’ by posting about their romantic orientation on their socials. Then, you have those who casually bring up their romantic orientation while watching a movie, eating dinner, etc.,” Graveris says.

How to support panromantic people.

The key to supporting the panromantic folks in your life is good education. Graveris says taking the time and making the effort to learn about different types of attraction, terms, and labels is also a crucial first step to understanding your feelings toward panromantic people and/or other people who have a different orientation from you. It’ll also be easier for you to support these individuals who might not express the same views/feelings as you.

“Moreover, ongoing self-education on the topic can help broaden one’s understanding of the bigger community. It also helps debunk myths and assumptions that are being thrown at panromantic people day in and day out. Take, for example, the belief that panromantic people love to sleep around,” he says.

Just because pan folks are attracted to all genders doesn’t mean they love to sleep around. Whether they choose to be in a monogamous or nonmonogamous relationship, that’s all up to them. Likewise, the likelihood of someone cheating has nothing to do with one’s romantic orientation, Graveris adds.

If you’re looking for more information about romantic orientations, there are excellent sources of information to learn more from, such as the Asexual Visibility and Education Network, which is a great information source to help people understand different terms associated with romantic orientation, sexual orientation, and sexuality. There’s also GLAAD, which is considered one of the most dynamic media sources that empower the LGBTQ+ community and its acceptance.

The takeaway.

Your sexual orientation is not the same thing as your romantic orientation. If you find yourself having romantic feelings for people without even considering their gender, you might be panromantic.

It’s important to understand and explore attraction and your romantic orientation. By doing this, you’ll develop a stronger sense of self-awareness, which will ultimately help you in all of your relationships across the board.

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