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Don’t try this at home…

Hi,
In May of 2013 I was instructed by someone not to cum for a year. He also instructed me to play with myself, but any sight of pre-cum I must add six months of no cumming. This could go on for years. Of course I have six months added. I have also been instructed online to put my cock and balls in ice water for a year. I am to hold my cock and balls in ice water for 1 minute; pull out for 1 minute, then repeat this 3 times. If I spill water I add another minute. I also must set my laptop on my cock and balls with no cover, which I am doing now. This is to loosen my cock and balls so I can pull my cock and balls behind my legs during the night to stretch my scrotum and they want my balls to hurt me daily. I write this for you to understand I do as instructed even if it is by chat. My question is, will this hurt me in the long term? I must do it because I do not want to seem as a fake submissive. I guess what I really want to know is what could this do to me in the long run? I have many more things I must do; such as ruler spanking, tie up with weights etc. My instructors plan this on a yearly plus extended plan.
Thank you,
mike

submissive02You’ve been at this extreme cock and ball torture and ejaculation control for nearly a year and you are just now getting around to asking about the possible adverse consequences? Well that don’t make no sense at all, my friend.

And I’m gonna go way out on a limb here and guess that you are gonna continue this behavior regardless of what I may tell you. These “instructors” of yours, you only know them from online, right? Listen, I’m all for someone enjoying the life of a submissive. Knock yourself out with that already! What I don’t get is how you can submit to someone you don’t really know. How can you be sure these “instructors” have your best interest at heart and not just making you do stupid and dangerous stuff for their own gratification? Maybe they know they have a gullible twit on their hands who will do anything they tell him to do; and so they make this twit (you) do stuff that endangers his wellbeing. And here’s a tip, pal: doin’ stupid stuff just because some jerk online tells you to do it doesn’t make you a fake submissive. You clearly know nothing about Dominance and submission.submissive01

Here’s the thing, real submissives don’t’ gamble with their health and wellbeing. They also don’t entrust themselves to a Dom that will abuse the power exchange relationship.

The ejaculation control seems excessive to me, but it’s your body. Apparently this gets you off in some fashion or another, just not in the tradition “shoot your wad” sorta way.

male submissiveExtreme ejaculation control, especially over a long period of time will surely impact your sexual response cycle. This excessive edging may make cuming with a partner in the future difficult if not impossible. But maybe that doesn’t concern you. But if future sexual satisfaction with a partner is important to you then I’d suggest you cut back on ejaculation control ASAP.

The same is true for the CBT (Cock and Ball Torture) you’re doin’. Excessive stretching over many hours, like overnight, is not advised. Extreme stretching, like what you describe, can injure your nuts and damage the delicate tissues in your dick. If you want your family jewels to last, I’d suggest you cut back on the stuff you’re doing.

I also suggest that you find someone to dominate you who has your best interest in mind. Remember, BDSM and power play is not abuse.

Good luck

Down To Clown

Name: Daniel
Gender: Male
Age: 20
Location: Chicago
One of my good friends and I had sex. This would not be so strange if it weren’t for the fact that he was both identifying as straight AND homophobic. Even stranger, he initiated everything from the kissing to the blowjobs, and I have to say, he was damn good at keeping teeth out of the equation. But he won’t date me, and even after the second time we had sex, he refuses because I’m too good a friend and that he doesn’t see me like that. He claims not to be attracted to me, and I think that’s bull. Nobody held a gun to his head and said, “Have gay sex now!” Even worse, he wants to bang one of our mutual friends who happens to be female, so his good friend comment is worth shit. I’m for the most part over him, but it still feels like a slap in the face. Any advice?

crazier than yourselfWhat we have here, Daniel, is a dude with a huge rift between his sexual practices and his self-perception; between his secret eroticism and what he thinks others know about him. Needless to say this is a very dangerous psychological dilemma for him or anyone like him. It’s no wonder he identifies as homophobic, pup, because indeed he is. At least he knows himself that well.

If you haven’t discovered this already, lots of homophobes indulge in the very thing that disgusts them. That’s why is so easy to see through all the bluster that these conflicted individuals make. You see, it’s like a smoke screen. They spew a lot of hate in an effort to disguise their lust. It’s one of those; “me thinks you doth protest too much” sorta deals.don't mind straight people

You also rightly point out the falsehood of the whole “too good a friend” argument that he uses to avoid dating you. As you probably can guess his hesitation to “date” you has absolutely nothing to do with friendship. He loathes himself for what he finds inside himself. And while he may dabble in the very thing he hates in private; he sure as hell doesn’t want to parade his shame around by publicly dating you — an out and, I assume, proud gay man. Right?

Oh, and that, “for the most part, I’m over him” statement is, I assume you know, gay-speak for “still carrying a big old messy torch for the fucked up monkey.”

peek-a-booFinally this incident oughta feel like a slap in the face. Ya know why? Because it was a slap in the face, darling. And you know what slaps in the face are supposed to do for us? That’s right, they’re supposed to wake us the fuck up. And they’re supposed to sting like hell afterward. This painful aftermath is intended to ward us away from getting to close to that particular stimulus ever again. Think of it like baby learning to avoid the stove after burning his had touching a hot burner.

So, ditch this dude, pup. If ya don’t, you can look forward to a whole lot more slaps in the face.

Good luck

Flipped Out

Hey sex fans,

It’s Product Review Friday! Way back in 2007 I reviewed a sex toy from the Japanese manufacturer, Tenga. It was one of their earliest designs and frankly, I hated it. You can find that review HERE!  I’ve avoided the Tenga line ever since. Now my sources tell me things have changed. Not one to hold a grudge, I got one of their latest incarnations for us to review.

So let’s check in with Dr Dick Review Crew members, Mick and Chuck, to see what they have for us.

Tenga Flip —— $99.00

Mick and Chuck
Mick: “Here’s the Tenga Flip. It’s a masturbation device for men.”tenga-black-flip-hole-1-900x900
Chuck: “Way to cut to the chase, Mick.”
Mick: “Well, that’s what it is! No need to beat around the bush. Oh, I think I made a pun. So here’s the deal; Chuck and I are into edge play. And for those unfamiliar with that term, that means jackin’ off while trying to last as long as you can.”
Chuck: “We’ve been doin’ this for years now and we can last for hours. It’s great. Mostly we just use our hands, but we also have a nice selection of masturbation sleeves and strokers too.”
Mick: “Yeah, we like mixing things up. Edging should never be boring. The Tenga Flip is our new favorite jerk off toy. Let me describe the brilliant design to you. Actually, there’s two parts to it. There’s the hard plastic outer shell and the soft stretchy inside. Unlike other such toys, the soft squishy sleeve is not removable. Rather the case is hinged so that it opens so you can lube up the sleeve before use and easy clean up after use.”tenga-flip-hole-male-mastubator-red
Chuck: “We used to have a favorite toy like this; I won’t mention the name, but its the most popular brand. It was fun to use, but clean up was a bitch. And the soft squishy sleeve would get tacky after a couple of uses and it would have to be replaced. I hated that! The Tenga Flip is a vast improvement over that most popular brand.”
Mick: “While we’re on the topic of the sleeve, I want to add that it’s made of an elastomer that is nonporous as well as latex and phthalate-free. The sleeve also features six different chambers, each shaped and positioned in a way to produce a different sensation.”
Chuck: “Check out the outer shell. See these three large plastic buttons? When you press down on the one nearest the opening, you are actually pressing down on the shaft of your cock, which creates a snugger fit at the opening of the Tenga Flip. When you press the middle button, it creates a vacuum effect in the chamber, which is so cool. And when you press Flip insidedown on the third button the entire sleeve softens and allows the lube you added before your session to flow more freely up and down the length of the sleeve. This creates a wetter, squishier feeling inside the sleeve. It’s like having three toys in one.”
Mick: “The Tenga Flip comes in two colors — black and red. But here’s the thing; it’s not just about a color preference. The black one features a snugger sensation, the red one features a caressing sensation.”
Chuck: “Clean up, as we mentioned earlier is easy with just hand soap and warm water. And then you can let it air dry by using the case as a stand. Again, totally cool.”
Mick: “If there’s one drawback, I’d have to say that the Tenga Flip is not designed for big-dicked guys. I’m a little above average in the girth department and it is almost too snug for me.”
Chuck: “It’s also not cheap! But ya know what? Tenga is using high quality materials and you can’t beat the amazing design, so I think it’s worth it.”
Mick: “I should also mention that the Tenga Flip comes with three samples of their branded water-based lube, with varying consistencies from thin to thick.”
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY!

A Budding Kinkster’s Dilemma, Part 2

So I heard back from Todd. I shared his first message to me last Monday. You can find that exchange HERE!

Name: Todd
Gender: Male
Age: 21
Location: Oregon
I took your advice and found a local club of like-minded people. I went to one of their mixers. I met so many amazing people. Among them was this woman who is about 16 years older than me. She’s a mistress and a Dom for women only. She was kind enough to take me under her wing. She’s married to this guy who also attends these mixers, but is not really part of the scene. This woman has been so amazing teaching me and letting me sit in on her sessions. Her submissives have also been amazing and so patient with me as I find my footing.

So this leads me to my problem. I’ve only dominated with her 3 times. Each time it gets easier and more comfortable and I love it. And strange as it sounds, now this mistress has invited me to dominate her. And I understand that this is a huge honor for a seasoned Dom to invite a novice to dominate her. The one thing that tears me is her husband. She also has a child. So I need to know what the etiquette is what the boundaries are on this. I can’t hardly go up to the husband and say, “hey, is it ok for me to spank your wife.” I guess I feel a little taboo about that.

My friend, you are bringing your traditional middle-class vanilla value system to this new alternative and very un-vanilla situation that you now find yourself in. This conventional value system and its accompanying boundaries may serve you well in your “regular” life, but here in this new life, they are outmoded and cumbersome.

gentleThat is not to say that in the kink world anything goes. On the contrary, it’s just that the value system here is way different and thus so will the etiquette be. Here’s a rule of thumb that you can live by. When someone, particularly someone of exceptional stature in alt culture, like this dominant woman, invites you to participate with her in a scene; she is letting you know that these are the boundaries. You’ll rarely go wrong if you allow your more seasoned partner to lead you, even if you are going to be the Dom in an upcoming scene.

Regarding her husband, he’s not the one who authorizes or prohibits the encounter. It is the woman who is in charge. I mean it’s conceivable that he could be a cuckold for his wife. Much stranger things have happened, don’t cha know. And if you don’t know about the cuckold fetish that so many men groove on, then you have even more remedial study ahead of you.

I do appreciate that you continue to check in with me about your adventure. I am so proud of you for being humble enough to submit to a woman’s tutelage. That marks you as an exceptional fellow indeed. Keep it up and keep me posted.

Finally I want to encourage you to check out my podcast series called Sex EDGE-U-cation.  This is the series where we take a look at the fascinating world of fetish sex and kink. In fact, you might invite your new Dom woman friend to listen in with you. I chat with amazing guests from around the world, and each of them offers a unique perspective on live on the edge.  Of particular interest will be my conversations with these marvelous professional Doms:  Mistress Katherine, Mistress Matisse, Lady Lydia, Lady HotchKiss, Claire Adams, Eve Minax, and Cleo Dubois.

Good luck

Sugar Daddy/Sugar Baby

Name: Rachel
Gender: Female
Age:
Location:
I just met someone online and I’d like to maybe try my hand at being a dominatrix, but not really sure where to begin. He emailed me some questions he wished me to answer, I was wondering if you could maybe help with a couple of ideas/suggestions on how to answer them just to get me started. I’m having a hard time finding people to contact about this. Oh and by the way am a sugar baby, it would be a sd/sb relationship (sugar daddy/sugar baby) which I thought might be the perfect way to start a BDSM relationship because I would like to adopt an alternate personality anyways. I’m really hoping not to be judged by anyone for any of this. I’m really having trouble getting started; maybe I need to just get into character? Think you can help me?

I kinda think being a dominatrix is a whole lot more than role-playing or getting into character, darlin’, unless, of course, you are simply a dilettante. And if that’s all you’re really interested in, it really doesn’t make a difference how you play this out. You can be as silly as you want.Sugar-Daddy

Think of this as being something similar to mastering a new language. Curiously enough, there are a lot of similarities between these two efforts. Just like leaning a few words and phrases in a foreign tongue doesn’t make you proficient in that language. So too donning a leather bustier and smacking a ridding crop against your leg doesn’t make you a dominatrix. Get it? Got it? Good!

dominatrix01However, if you really want to get into the life, there’s a considerable amount of remedial work ahead of you. Before you can claim the title “dominatrix” you will have to make an intensive study of what this entails. This is best done under the tutelage of another reputable Dom. Of course, not every pro-Dom is gonna want to take on an novice and show her the ropes, as it were. It’s no wonder you’re having problems connecting with others who might help you. But if you’re lucky, you might find a kind soul out there who will give you a break. And just so you know, these lessons will not come cheaply.

I also encourage you to approach others in the life with a good deal more deference and thoughtfulness then how you approached me. If they get a sense that you are simply an airhead twit, you’ll be out before you are even in.

Finally, I suggest that you listen to any one or all of the interviews I’ve done with real professional Dominatrices. I think you will find them both enlightening and informative. Here’s Mistress Katherine, Mistress Matisse,
Eve Minax, Lady Lydia, Lady Hotchkiss, Claire Adams, and Cleo Dubois.

Good luck

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