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Do Do That Voodoo That You Do So Well!

A curious lot today, don’t cha know. Some folks are simply confused about the concept. Others are just pulling my leg.

Name: agrah
Gender:
Age: 30 ish
Location: michigan
I am curious what the pregnancy rate is for people using anal sex as a means of birth control. While its not my method, (I have an IUD) it is disturbing to me that people think anal sex is fool proof birth control.

HUH? Girl, how’s a chick gonna get pregnant via ass fucking? You explain that to me and I’ll be happy to comment further.

Name: Rocket Man
Gender:
Age: 31
Location: Nashville4_afro.jpg
Big Dr. Dick, Between busy work schedules, travelling and such, I had not had much time for sex. It was actually about a 5 week span without sex or masturbation. When my wife and I finally got together I was built up big time. I new my response would be quick and my load would likely triple it’s normal oozeage. Being that it had been so long, there was not much foreplay…we just wanted to get down to the hardcore humping. I was sitting on a couch and she climbed on top. On her 3rd downstroke, I blew like a friday afternoon work whistle. She shot off my cock back first into the coffetable, broke it in half and received a few splinters in her ass! Should we replace this piece of furniture, or should I just make her kneel in the floor and rest my legs on her when she’s done sucking me off in the future?

You Nashville folks have all the fun! You get extra points for making me laugh. Perhaps all ya need is sturdier furniture.

PS: don’t be surprised if I steal this: “I blew like a Friday afternoon work whistle.” That’s downright hilarious.

Name: colleen
Gender:
Age: 28
Location: california
I have noticed lately that i am way more horney than normal it is like I can’t ever get enough and the slightes touch gets me going. Also my natural smell from my vagina seems to be extra strong lately and sometimes after my husband and i have sex I have a clear but chunky discharge. I was regulalry with summers eve wash and I have never smelled so strong as I do now. I feel like I am a dog in heat. What is wrong with me?

WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU? Simply put, you’re 28 and you’re as randy as all get-out, darling. Sounds like you’re pert-near feral. If you were in the wild your super-strong odor would attract males from far and wide; each and every one hoping for his opportunity to satisfy your vixen lusts.

And that “clear but chunky discharge” you’re having after the hubby bones you? Doll, I’d be willing to guess that’s his spooge drippin’ out of your cunt. Ahhh, youth!

Name: lulu
Gender:
Age: 19
Location: dallas
normally my boyfriend wears a condom and if he doesnt he always pulls out, but the other day he cummed inside me and it stung horribly. is this normal??

Hell, no! That ain’t normal, honey. Nobody’s jizz is supposed to sting, unless it gets in your eye!

And what the fuck are you two doin screwin around without always using a condom? You actually trust him to pull out in time…every time? What kind of cockamamie contraceptive strategy is that?

I sure as hell hope you puppies are doubling up on birth control — he, a condom; you, the pill or a diaphragm. Slip-ups happen like clockwork for youngens, like you. That’s why it’s better to be doubly safe than eternally sorry.

Get it done, LuLu! Clearly, your numbskull BF doesn’t use the good sense god gave him, or he’d seal himself in latex before he jumped your bones. Unplanned pregnancies can ruin lives!

Name: Mace
Gender:
Age: 31
Location: Oklahoma City
5497486_400.jpg I have an issue with my current girlfriend. She and I are both on the same page with a high sex drive. We both also put a higher priority on satisfying the other before ourselves. My problem is this, I tend to take a longer time to orgasm than my mate. Although she is physically satisfied, she is discouraged at her own sexual prowress because she believes that my climaxing when she does shows that I am as turned on as her. How can I ensure a matching climax, or reassure her that I still think she’s sexy even though I don’t climax?

If it ain’t one thing, it’s another. Are simultaneous orgasms really all that important? Hey, If it happens, it happens. Fine! But personally, I think they’re vastly overrated. Obviously, being turned on and climaxing are not the same thing, so have the GF chill out. Besides, lots of people find it a huge turn on to watch their partner cum. And one can’t hardly enjoy the show if one is busy producing his or her own display, right?

Mark my words, the added pressure to cum simultaneously will only induce a serious case of performance anxiety in one or the both of you. And that will sure-as-shootin’ throw a monkey wrench into the sweet thing you guys got goin on.

Name: sarah
Gender:
Age: 18
Location: detroit
why do anal sex hurt so bad what can i do to stop the pain

Nope, it doesn’t always hurt so bad. Sometimes it hurts so good.

Chances are the guy who’s pluggin you doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doin. Just because he has a cock and you have a bunghole don’t make you experts butt pirates.

You kids need to read this: Liberating The B.O.B. Within

Good luck ya’ll!

Several Steamy Summer Solstice Sexual Situations — SOLVED!

Don’t you just love alliteration?

Summer is here…at least in the northern hemisphere. All hail Sol Invictus! Instead of being outdoors enjoying the beautiful weather we’re having here in the Emerald City, I’m stuck indoors, at this freakin’ keyboard. HELP! Maybe if I hurry up and get my homework done, my mom will let me go out and play.

Name: john
Gender:
Age: 58
Location: Detroit
married and testing the water, so to speak. Was with a man who is HIV and I swallowed a couple of drops of his cum. Should I be concerned/worried?

gettestedposter-english2.pngAhhhh, yeah! I’d sure enough be concerned, if I were you. I’d be concerned enough to get tested, that’s for sure — not just now, but again in 6 weeks or so. While it’s not overly likely that you’ve sero-converted by this incident alone, stranger things have happened.

I am of the mind that all sexually active people (especially you people who are being sexual outside of your primary relationships) be tested for HIV and other sexually transmitted infections regularly…at least twice a year. All you sexual athletes out there should test every other month. You shouldn’t even think about it, you should just do it. It is painless, discreet, but most importantly, it’s the responsible thing to do. If you make it part of your lifestyle, then there will be no embarrassment associated with the trip to your doctor or the local clinic. Made this happen, people.

Good luck

Name: Frank
Gender:
Age: 18
Location: Brazil
I have never had sex with anyone before and i believe i am straight, as i feel attrakted towrds girls, but every now and again i like watching gay porn. is this a sign that i’m bisexual or gay? or is it just curiosity?

Can’t hardly say what you are, Frank. Maybe it’s too soon to be giving yourself a label.

What I can tell you is, I’m as queer as a $3 dollar bill (as we say here in America), and I sometimes watch straight porn. That sure as hell don’t make me straight…don’t even make me bi, honey. I guess that just leaves…curious, huh?

Good luck

Name: asianIndian
Gender:
Age: 24
Location: San Diego, CA
I have been masturbating almost everyday for the past 10 years now. Last year was the first time I tried to get laid off. It was with a 30 woman and I found that I was not able to retain the stiffness of my dick while pumping her. At the end I had to pull out and masturbate to ejaculate. I tried it couple of more women on different occasion and I faced with the same problem. All the three times I had to pull out and masturbate with my hand. I felt really embarrassed and I am afraid of going out with any other women. I also noticed that when I masturbate I do it vigorously and for a prolonged period of time. But when I was having sex I was not able to pump the women for more than 3-4 minutes, I felt part exhausted and my penis too looses its stiffness. How can I over come this major problem?

Name: tanya
Gender:
Age: 28
Location: ca
my boyfriend has trouble cuming durning sex.he can cum if we are doing anael or I give him a blow job. he takes a long time to cum if we do doggie style. but he cant cum most the time and he cant cum if hes on top. can it be metal or health wise? help please.

You guys are a real pair! I thought I’d respond to you both at the same time.

pic13981.jpgLots of guys find it difficult to cum in penis/vagina fucking. Sometimes there’s simply not enough friction due to flabby, out of shape untoned pussy muscles. Tanya darling, are you doing your Kegel exercises? You should be, if you’re not. If the BF can get off in your ass and with your mouth and hand, then that tells me you have more of a grip in these other orifices then you do in your whoha. It’s not the end of the world. It can be remedied with a little exercise.

Mr. AsianIndian, maybe your masturbation technique gives you more direct cock stimulation than what you get inside a pussy. If that’s the case, you’ll probably have to learn to masturbate with a lighter touch or find a tighter snatch. You could also try masturbating till you get close to shooting, and then stick it in again. Either way, there’s no need to feel embarrassed. Like I said, lots of guys can’t get off by fucking alone. Just like lots of women don’t have vaginal orgasms. They need to stimulate their clit for that.

Good luck

Name: james
Gender:
Age: 18
Location: lewes, de
is there a way i can make my dick bigger without pills. my dick is so small i cant do alot of the positions i like. i even slip out doin misonary. so can you help me.

Name: ali
Gender:
Age: 39
Location: glasgow
what is the best thinks to mack the (cock-peanas) biger)

Well. Boys, here’s the deal. Throughout history, men have obsessed with the size of their cocks. And when there’s that much attention paid to something that trivial, you can be sure there’s gonna be an entire industry poised to bilk the shit out of the willie worrisome, like you guys.

All of this unfortunate big-dick envy creates a never-ending parade of con artists tryin’ to sell a remedy, of one sort or another, to cure guys, just like you, of their “shame”. But, take it from Dr. Dick, the dick doctor; it’s all bullshit. And some of the bullshit is really scary and dangerous bullshit.

monsterpumped.jpgFor every little peanut out there, there is some kooky diet, ridiculous cream, bogus massage technique or worthless breathing exercise that is supposed to transform one’s mini-meat into the giant economy size. And let’s not forget the weights you can hang on your thang, the Vacuum device to pump up your thang. And of course the twenty-first century solution — cosmetic surgery — to put a happy face on your thang. The results are dubious if there are any results at all. And each has negative side effects, some of which are more revolting than others.

Here’s the last word on this — don’t waste your money on any of this crap. Or better yet, send me the money, and I’ll put it to good use. Here’s the very best advice I can offer a guy who is unhappy about the size of his schlong…learn to love what ya got and leave it alone.

Good luck

Name: spungee
Gender:
Age: 36
Location: canada’s capital (you figure it out)
hey. i am a big time anal fan, both giving and receiving. spouse and i have enjoyed anal for some years now, both me giving to her and me gettin pegged. my concern is that while she was really into it at first, she seems to have cooled down a bit recently when it comes to nailing me. any thoughts on how to warm things up again? cheers, spungee

b758.jpgI know what the capitol of Canada is, it’s Ottawa. I went to collage, ya know. I was gonna vist Ottawa, but then I heard it’s filled with Canadians.

Why did things fall off, so to speak? Is the pegging all about you? What’s in it for her? If you get pegged, what does she get? Maybe she’s just bored. Maybe she thinks you’re being selfish. Have you checked in with her lately? Maybe she wants to see you get nailed by the real thing. Ever consider replacing the dildo with 100% prime Canadian Beef?

Good luck

Name: Carlos
Gender:
Age: 24
Location: Colombia
does coffee have a negative effect on one’s erection? Does anyone know if this is true and why this would be?

Never heard of such a thing! Since Seattle is coffee central here in the good old US of A, I’m sure I would have heard of this, or seen some evidence of this here. I have not! Everyone here in Seattle has a huge stiff erection…all the time

Come to think of it, if you poured hot coffee on your unit that would have a negative effect your stiffy. That’s for damn sure!

Good luck

Get a Hold of Yourself!

MAY is National Masturbation Month!

That’s right, SEX FANS, there’s an entire month dedicated to Jackin’ & Jillin’ Off. I believe this designation came directly from Dick Cheney’s office. That man is wild! If it isn’t his pregnant lesbiterian daughter, it’s a month devoted to the pleasures of Onanism. YOU GO, DICK!

To celebrate, THE CENTER FOR SEX & CULTURE in San Francisco (of course) is throwing its annual Masturbate-A-Thon! And I want everyone in my audience to participate. Set aside a little time everyday through the end of the month for some personal recreation — Slice Your Pie or Beat Your Meat. And when you’re finished, mozie on over to the Masturbate-A-Thon website and either donate or pledge your support.

Here’s how you can participate. 2006.jpg

  • Attend the Masturbation Party. Get your pals to pledge for every minute or every orgasm. The daring can choose to become a masturbation porn star, showing all for the LIVE internet streaming cameras.
  • Masturbate From Home! This is the funnest pledge drive ever. Get your friends to sponsor you by the minute or by the orgasm. You have all day to achieve your masturbation goals.
  • Watch The Event On The Web! Enjoy the event from the privacy of your own home? Watch the live feed from the event itself and don’t forget to touch yourself impurely. What Fun!
  • Donate Or Pledge! Check out all the scheduled performers and pledge for the ones that tickle your fancy. All money is tax deductible.

When? Saturday, May 26th: 4:00 pm – 10:00 pm2005.jpg

2007 Masturbate-a-thon Competitions

  • Longest Squirt Distance
  • Longest Time Masturbating
  • Most Orgasms
  • Tag Team Fun

Entertainment will include:

— Opera Singers
— Sexy Furries
— Sex Educators Dr. Carol Queen and Nina Hartley
— The Screaming Streaming Stage

BE THERE, OR BE SQUARE!

ATTENTION SHOPPERS!

So many people are writing in for information about sex toys — What are they? Where can I get ‘em? How do I work one of these? Can you suggest a good one? Do these things really work? — that I’ve decided to inaugurate a new feature here on Dr Dick Sex Advice SEX TOY AWARENESS. Just like another popular feature — The Sexual Enhancement Tutorials — the STA will be chock-full of swell information while being downright entertaining.

Here’s what I’m gonna do. Thanks to Dr Dick’s Stockroom I have the wherewithal to SHOW & TELL you everything you need to know to make an intelligent decision about buying a quality sex toy. And you can shop at Dr Dick’s Stockroom with confidence. We carry the best quality and widest variety of sex toys for adventurous men and women. The service is prompt, convenient and responsive. We never share information about our customers with anyone, and all orders are shipped in discrete packaging. What more could one ask?

drdicksstockroom.jpg

So, sex fans, I hope you will find my SEX TOY AWARENESS postings helpful (and entertaining) and that you will enjoy shopping at my store.

Name: Tadd
Gender: Male
Age: 31
Location: Arizona
In one of your podcasts you told some guy about a strap on kit he could buy for his GF. Could you repeat that? I’ve been trying to find one.

I think you are referring to my 04/09/07 podcast. I responded to Karol from Poland inquiry about a strap-on kit. I said: “As to your question about a strap-on and what a guy should know about buying one for his female partner. That’s another really goodb664.jpg question. I suspect the overriding concern for the amateur butt pirate is to get his gal a comfortable harness that can accommodate a couple different sized dildos. May I turn you attention to the Dr dick’s Stockroom banner on the left hand side of www.drdicksexadvice.com. Click through there and search for the Bend Over Beginner Harness Kit (B664). The good people at JT’s have painstakingly put together everything you need for your first pegging!”

  • Is there someone in your life who is curious about strapping it on, but doesn’t know quite where to begin? Well, we have the perfect starter kit! Everything a beginning sensuous player would need to strap it on is included in this package (except their favorite water-soluble lubricant – sold separately).
  • This strap-on harness is low-riding with a fuzzy, deep purple velvet front and highly adjustable nylon straps. The kit has 2 color coordinated, shimmery purple dildos. These hypoallergenic silicone dildos are shaped and sized appropriately for those just beginning anal play adventures. The smaller is approximately 4″ long and 3⁄4″ wide, while the larger one is 5″ long and 11⁄4″ wide.
  • A powerful variable-speed mini-vibe sits in a secret pocket behind the dildo to give the wearer an extra jolt of fun. The straps are adjustable, fitting up to 50″ hips. The 11⁄2″ O-ring can be exchanged for play with other sized dildos (sold separately). Washable, smart, and sexy. Bottom line – this is one hot strap-on package!

Good luck

Name: Jordan
Age: 19
Location: Michigan
What is a cockring and how does it work?

Holy cow, Jordan, where to begin. Every man should know about cockrings. Cockrings, in one form or another, have been around for as long as there have been cocks…and that’s a pretty long time, don’t ‘cha know! They are low-tech, but extremely effective means of getting it up and keeping it hard.

Cock rings can create larger, harder erections. Since blood flow enters your dick through arteries deep inside your dick, and leaves it through the veins on the outside of your tool, wearing a cock ring can help to keep more blood inside your dick shaft. And as all you rocket scientists know blood is what causes erections in the first place. Some men claim that wearing a cock ring intensifies their orgasm.

I recommend the flexible and/or adjustable cockrings. These are generally made of

b642.jpg

stretchable rubber or leather. Let’s take a look as some now. First, the Neoprene Cock Ring (B642).

  • This light yet durable cock ring is made of neoprene – an oil-resistant substitute for natural rubber. Neoprene displays outstanding physical toughness and resistance to damage caused by flexing and twisting. It is an extremely versatile synthetic rubber with 70 years of proven performance in a broad industry spectrum.

Next, we have these festive little numbers, Gummy Cock Rings (B170)

b170.jpg

  • Fruity-colored cockrings with multiple soft knobs. When unstretched, it fits snugly around a pinky finger. When stretched, it can expand to a surprising diameter. Once removed, the ring will slowly contract to its original size. One size fits all.

For the more butch among us we have this handsome devil — Leather Cock Ring w/ Pyramid Studs (A413)

a413.jpg

  • This ring comes with pyramid-stud hardware for that extra-macho look. It measures 9/16″ and sports three snaps to adjust the size for a snug fit.

For the more daring there are the metal variety. They may look pretty, but they’re a bitch to put on and to take off. Here’s how ya do it.

1. Pull your ball sack through the ring first.
2. Follow this by popping each of your balls through the ring one at a time.
3. Now bend your cock down and pull it through the ring.

Let’s take a look at some of these. First, the standard Aluminum Cock Ring (A888)a888.jpg

  • This style of Cock Ring is a significant improvement over the standard steel O-ring. Since it is made of aluminum, it is very lightweight and perfectly smooth, as no connector seam is necessary.
  • Sizing hint: Measure the circumference of (the distance around) the erect penis at the place where you want the ring to go. Divide by 3.1 and you have a ballpark number for the diameter of a snug-fitting ring.

b352.jpgThen there’s “cockring as fashion statement” — Teardrop Cock Rings (B352)

  • The Teardrop Cock Ring is worn around the cock and balls, but what makes this cock ring different is that it gently massages the perineum (the spot between the balls and anus) and other erogenous zones. It is made out of anodized aluminum, which is lighter and smoother than its chrome-plated counterparts, and preferable for people who have nickel allergies.

It’s absolutely essential that you not wear this kind of ring for longer than a couple hours. Make sure you don’t buy one that is too small either. If your dick is turning an angry red or worse, purple, or it is cold to the touch, you’re in trouble. Take that ring off immediately. If you don’t you will risk serious injury to your precious dick.

Good luck.

Name: Betty
Age: 22
Location: Fremont CA
I think my roommate is a lesbian. She hasn’t come right out and said so and I don’t know how to ask. Her birthday is coming up and I thought I would get her a sexy toy or something to let her know that it’s ok to talk to me about sex and stuff. Do you think I should get her a dildo? What kind of dildos do lesbians like?

Jeez Betty, how the fuck should I know what lesbians like? I’m pretty well versed on most things sexual, but even I am at a loss when it comes to the mind of a lesbian. I just put in a call to my favorite lesbiaterian, the magnificent Diana, for the 411 on toys for dykes and dyke wannabees.

b367.jpgIf you don’t want to be too provocative in your gift giving, Diana suggests you start out with a — I Rub My Duckie Vibe (B367)

  • These floating, waterproof little guys sit by your bath, jacuzzi, or bed with nothing more than those big innocent blue eyes to give away their real purpose in life!
  • Squeeze their backs and watch your smile grow as they seduce you and massage your tensions away. Waterproof On-Off Switch. Strong but quiet motor. Requires two AA batteries (included).

If you really want to pitch your friend an unambiguous message, Diana suggests a — b193.jpg

Vibratex Rabbit Habit (B193)

  • This vibrator does everything! It has three functions. The shaft gyrates and is bendable with a wire inside to keep its angle. Mid-way down, there’s a capsule of pea-sized pearls that rotate around the shaft for an undulating/ripple effect. And the bunny vibrates for clitoral stimulation.

If this doesn’t do the trick, Betty, nothing will.

Good luck

Name: Gary
Age: 58
Location: Tampa
I’m a widower; my wife of 29 years died a little over a year ago. I’m just now getting back into the swing of thing. The sex I had with my wife was very conventional now I want to try something different. I want to go to a dominatrix. I’ve always had a fantasy about a woman owning and punishing my privates. It’s a big turn on. Is there anything I should know about this?

I love it; another kinkster in the making. Coming out as a perv is better done late than b702.jpgnever, in my opinion. My first suggestion is that you find a better term for your privates than “privates”. You sound like your mommy. I suggest cock and balls, it pretty much says it all very succinctly.

Have you done your homework in terms of finding the right dominatrix? I suppose you have at least a couple in mind, right? Might I suggest that when you make contact with one or another of these professional women that you be very specific about what you want and how you want it.

Here’s a tip…a good submissive, or sub — that’s you, Gary, will want to bring his dominatrix, or dom a little gift to start things off on the right foot. May I suggest this little number: A Male Chastity Kit (B702).

  • It represents the latest design in modern male chastity. The natural flow of lines in this model represents the penis and conforms to the body. The slim, smooth lines permit this device to be worn easily under clothing. It is slightly vented with curving lines and custom openings for comfort and hygiene. The material, a highly durable transparent polycarbonate, is functional and appealing, and its strength exceeds that of acrylic and many other plastic blends.

Good luck

Time On My Hands

When I was just a little tike, the nuns who taught me in grade school would often say, “idle hands are the devil’s workshop.” Far be it from me to lend the devil an idle hand. While I was waitin’ on my new computer, the one that allowed me to resume my podcasts, I decided to use some of the down time to respond to a backlog of correspondents in the old fashioned way…by writing.

Name: Adam
Gender:
Age: 34
Location: UK
I have been attracted to male children for years. Having been arrested for viewing child porn I realize that I need to pursue a celibate lifestyle. I realize that celibacy is a demanding lifestyle. What advice would you offer me?

You present a particularly touchy issue for our culture, Adam. But before I respond, I’d like to help you with some of your vocabulary. You say you need to pursue a celibate lifestyle. I think you mean to say you need to pursue an abstinent lifestyle. The two concepts — celibacy and sexual abstinence — mean different things. Unfortunately, way too many people use these terms interchangeably. This is not a good thing and only serves to muddy the waters further.

Celibacy has a very specific meaning. Let me whip out my trusty, handy dandy Funk & Wagnalls dictionary. Celibacy: the state of being unmarried. Some people infer, especially those of a strict religious bent, that celibacy also connotes sexual abstinence. Ya see, religious people are of the mind that there is no legitimate sexual expression outside the confines of heterosexual marriage. Legitimate or not, unmarried people have always been and will always continue to be sexual, so making that unfortunate connection between celibacy and abstinence ill advised.

The only thing we ought to be able to say for sure when someone identifies him/herself as celibate is that he/she is not married. To assume a celibate person, even one who has taken a vow of celibacy, is sexually abstinent is quite a dangerous stretch indeed. Need I point out the very unfortunate sex abuse scandals that continue to plague the Roman Catholic Church?

In the same way, if someone identifies him/herself as sexually abstinent, the only thing we ought to be able to say for sure is that he/she is not engaging in any type of sexual expression. It would be false to assume that a sexually abstinent person is not married, because there are a lot of married people who are indeed sexually abstinent.

In your case, Adam, I believe you are telling me that you are both not married (celibate), and because of your particular sexual predilection — young boys — you must also be sexually abstinent. If I’ve got this right…and it is very important that I not misinterpret your words…then I think there are options you may not have considered.

I firmly believe that we learn our sexuality. All we eroticize, in your case boys, is learned behavior. You once learned to eroticize boys; you can now learn to eroticize a more appropriate group of people. This isn’t a particularly easy thing to accomplish, but it’s not impossible either.

Anytime any one of us discovers that the object of our desires is someone inappropriate, we need to adjust our eroticism immediately. This is the better part of being a sexually responsible person. Pedophilia is just one such inappropriate eroticism. A father for his daughter, a mother for her son, a boss for a subordinate, a man for his neighbor’s wife, a teacher for her student, a counselor for his/her client, a congressman for his page…are you getting the picture? I hope so. And the list goes on and on.

I believe learning to readjust your eroticism to a more appropriate outlet is a much better option than trying to live a sexually abstinent lifestyle. The reason I believe this is that having a more appropriate outlet will at least give you an outlet for your pent up sexuality. If you have no outlet, or limit yourself to masturbation, you will only intensify your longings and further fixate on the inappropriate object of your current desires.

Like anyone trying to wean him/herself off a bad habit, the task ahead of you Adam, will be challenging. It will also be enriching and life-affirming. I hasten to add that you ought not try to do this on your own. Work with a sex-positive therapist.

You’re a relatively young man with many years ahead of you. These years can be filled with happy, healthy and appropriate sexual expression. Make it happen.

Good luck!

Name: Bert
Age: 54
Location: Amsterdam, The Netherlands
Dear Sir,
7 years ago I lost my lover who I had lived for 14 years by AIDS. 6 months later I met my present lover. His lover just died of lung cancer. We met each other at a time we needed someone in our life. I am not a person who steps inside easily into a relationship. For the first 3 years we had a review every 3 months and every 3 months we extended our relationship for another 3 months. I needed time to get over my loss. My problem is that I cannot ejaculate when I have sex with my present lover and my appetite for sex has vanished. Before my lover died I had the greatest appetite for sex and I had no inhibitions about sex. I feel shy and uncomfortable when he approaches me and I do have an erected penis. In the first years I thought the reason was my lost of my lover. But after seven years it must be over. Can you give me advice?

Dear Bert,
Grief has a profound effect on our sexual response. In my practice I have found that grief is one of the leading causes of sexual dissatisfaction and dysfunction. You, Bert, present the classic symptoms of grief induced sexual dysfunction and dysphoria.

As you probably know, some animals mate for life. When the mate dies, that animal will not mate again. Are you such an animal? Is seven years of grieving enough? I can’t say. Grieving is such an individual thing. What I can tell you is it is time for you to bring this concern to a professional for help. I suggest that you seek the help of a qualified sex-positive therapist, someone who is well versed in both sexuality and grief counseling. It’s imperative that you address this issue as soon as you can. Don’t let this go unattended any longer. It will fester and destroy any sexual relationship you will try to establish in the future.

Good luck!

Name: Lenore
Age: 28
Location: IL
Whenever I have sex with ANYONE (it could be the hottest guy on the planet) I have to ALWAYS imagine I am with someone else from my past. The guy in question was the first guy I ever had sex with. We only did it once and I never saw him again after that. I was 17 in high school and he was 23 in the navy. Now if I don’t imagine this guy I can’t achieve orgasm, no matter how GOOD the partner I have is making me feel. I’m having a good time, I lubricate like crazy, but when it gets right down to it, I HAVE to think of this guy or no orgasm.
Can you give me some advice on this?

Are you suggesting that what you describe here is a problem? Or are you just making a point and asking me for my thoughts on the matter? I hope it’s the later, because I

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don’t see that your fantasy life is getting in the way of you enjoying your sexuality. On the contrary, your fantasies are enriching your sexuality. You’re able to fully enjoy sex, even to orgasm…with the help of your recollections of the guy who popped your cherry.

As to what goes on in your head during sex, well that’s no body’s business but yours, unless you want to tell your partner what’s on our mind. Everyone enjoys sexual fantasies as an integral part of their sexual expression. And rarely do those fantasies include the person right there bumpin’ parts with the person doing the fantasizing. There’s nothing wrong with that, don’t ‘cha know! I mean, why would you want to leave your largest sexual organ, your brain, unstimulated when your pussy is having such a good time?

Why not just enjoy what works for you?

Good luck!

Name: Kevin
Age: 30
Location: Delaware
I would like to know why gay men and lesbian woman have fetishes (turned on by a certain body part). I’m turned on by feet and by men wearing all01010801150101031020071202061df1a0067a5a44f400c442.jpg types of boots and all types of sox please reply with answer thanx

Ya know, Kevin, fetishes are not just a gay/lesbian phenomenon. Every kind of person may have fetishes.

Fetishes come in all sizes and shapes; body parts, clothing, hair color, (racial fetishes…as we will see later) particular sex acts, sex toys, to name just a few. There are a few plausible explanations for these behaviors, but the one I prefer is that we learn our sexuality. All the things we eroticize — in your case feet, footwear and sox — are learned behaviors. I suppose that if you had the time and energy to retrace your steps, as it were, you’d find a specific time and place when you began to fetishize these things. The people who study human sexuality say that there is a pleasurable connection of one sort or another with everything we find erotic. Some fetishes develop later in life, some start when we are children or even infants.

Good luck!

Name: Mura
Age: 22
Location: Japan
I am 22 year old. I like and love strong and humor and good-looking male man. When saw the man like those, my cock is becoming hard and want to have sex. Frankly speaking, I like and love black Actors of USA Will Smith and Denzel Washington. When I watch their films, I do my cock by myself. I feel it s very nice. But I also think that it is not good. But I can’t control myself. I don’t know how to do. Please tell me your advice.

Lots of us share your sexual fantasies of black American actors.

— Denzel! Denzel! Denzel! Oh baby, oh baby, you make me so hot! —

And those that don’t share your (our) fantasy have other beloved fantasies of their own, just like Lenore and Kevin above you. There is nothing wrong with that. Masturbating to sexual fantasies is good and healthy. It will help you learn about your

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body. Enjoy yourself. Try not to think of yourself as having a problem. This is all very natural.

Good luck!

Name: Jose
Age: 27
Location: Miami
Dear Dr.Dick, I’m been having a problem for a long time I’m a goodlooking guy that works out, healthy, professional but I have a problem I can only have sex with men of color only I fantasy about it everyday till the other day I call an escort service and finally I did it but now I’m worse still having more fantasies everyday and I don’t know if this is an addiction problem or what, I try white guys but they do not turn me on at all and by the way I’m Latin, can you please advise.

Why do you think there’s a problem with your sexual preferences? It sounds like you’re doing fine, you’ve discovered that you’re into men of color.

— Denzel! Denzel! Denzel! Oh baby, oh baby, you make me so hot! …WHOOPS, I THERE I GO AGAIN…

No need to apologize for that. Why not just enjoy yourself…and the luscious black men that we love so much?

Good luck!

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