Tag Archives: Q&a

Where went the wood?

Name: bob
Gender: Male
Age: 26
Location: pa
(Never happened before) But I couldn’t get it up tonight, and this chick was H OT. Now I’m not gay at all, but I haven’t had sex in about 3 years because I was locked up…so I masturbated pretty regularly about 3 or 4 times a week. But I can’t figure out why I was soft… the only thing I can think of is “I ate clams tonight and I’ve never had them before. Could it be that or should I get checked out?

It weren’t the clams, my friend! And I don’t think you need to get check out, either…at least not right away. If you could back away from the situation a little bit and stop freakin’ out. I think you’d discover the source of your problem all on your own.

Here’s the thing, while you were out of commission, there in the jailhouse, you relied on, as you say, jerkin’ off. Ok, cool. We all gotta get by somehow. Now the first time you try to score after your release; you go soft. This tells me you have a mild case of performance anxiety. We all get that from time to time.dessert

There’s probably nothing wrong with you or with your johnson. You just got the jitters first time you tried to get you some fine pussy after bein’ away, that’s all.

The anticipation of bonin’ this HOT chick, fueled by some predictable self-consciousness; what with just gettin out of the slammer and all, pulled the plug on your wood. No surprise there, right?

What I don’t want to see happen is for you to replay the incident over and over in your mind’s eye till that’s all I can think about. Hey, maybe that’s already happening. If it is, this proverbial molehill will, sure enough, become a mountain. You’ll then bring all this anxiety to your next encounter. Setting you up for even more disappointment. You can see how this shit can snowball, right?

If you interpret every less than satisfying encounter as a failure, your fears will become self-fulfilling. You’ll begin to avoid partnered sex and you’ll develop a full-blown sexual dysfunction. Your self-esteem will take a nosedive too.

If you are preoccupied with your performance, it’s less likely that you’ll be fully present during sex with a partner. This pretty much fucks up your sexual responsiveness and any hope for spontaneity. Don’t let this happen to you, Bob. Why not just relax into the whole sex thing and not try to prove your manhood or your sexual prowess with your pecker?

Good luck

It’s a small world after all

Name: ali
Gender:
Age: 25
Location: canada
my girlfriend dont waana get maried to me beacuse she is afraid of sex , she hates sex because she think its a disguesting thing like sucking fingering n etc what am i suppose to do i love her how i satisfy her dat we have to marry???

Why would you want to marry a chick that doesn’t like sex as much as you do? That just seems crazy to me. If you think you’re gonna win her over and change her mind about sex by marrying her, that’s even crazier. Loving someone is not enough to overcome this kind of sex aversion. If she’s unwilling to see a therapist to help her through her distaste of sex, then I’d say it was time for you to find another potential bride.

misunderstanding

 

Name: Randy
Gender:
Age: 24
Location: Florida
Is it possible that anal sex can result in increased flatulence?

Ahhh yeah! Think of your ass as a cylinder and your partner’s cock as a piston. All this slamming in and out forces air up your bum. And what happens to that trapped air after (and sometimes even during) the fuck fest? You got it…farts for days. It’s no big thing, all bottoms get fuck-farts. The same is true for women — her pussy is the cylinder and her partner’s cock is the piston. All this slamming in and out forces air into her cooch, producing the very familiar pussy-fart.

Name: Jonathan
Gender: Male
Age:
Location: UK
Hello, please could you tell me if there is a way to increase the size of my testicles permanently, I do shoot a good amount of cum but they are small in the hand and look small in underwear and swim trunks, have you any advice on what I could try,

Hold on there, big fella. What are you tellin’ me? Do you want to increase the size of your balls (testicles), or the size of your sack (scrotum)? You can do the later, but not the former. If you are past puberty, your balls are the size they are gonna be, there’s no increasing them. Your sack, on the other hand can be stretched to increase its size. Will that satisfy you? If so, read this: …don’t let me get too deep. If not, you’re out of luck, darlin’!

Oh, and by the way, the “good amount of cum” you mention, most of that, 70% of it, is not sperm, the reproductive cells produced in your balls. Most of your semen is a mixture of fluids produced in your seminal vesicles, prostate, and bulbourethral glands.

Good luck.

Never too old

Hey sex fans!

Before we get to today’s Q&A, I have two announcements. First, allow me to introduce you to my new Tumblr site: SEx AdViCe wITH An EDGe. It’s deliciously smutty, don’t cha know. Second, podcasts will resume this coming Monday with a remarkable guest, erotic filmmaker, Kyle Henry.

Alrighty, now to my correspondent.

Name: Macwinhar
Gender: Male (I’m gonna guess)
Age:
Location:
DR. DICK, We have been together almost 25 years. I feel like we need to spice it up. He has had some health issues with knee replacements. He feels he is not a good top any longer. But for me is, that is not the issue. It is not about the topping as is about the intimacy. I am not sure what to do? HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sexual boredom often sets in to long-term relationships. And the health issues that accompany the aging process can also throw a wrench in the sexual works, so to speak. These challenges can either be an opportunity for some creative problem solving or they can completely extinguish sexual interest all together.andropause3

I’m disappointed in you, sir! You suggest in your message that butt fuckin’ is the only sexual expression open to you fellas. Surely, you can be a bit more resourceful than that. Have you taken the time to check in with your partner lately to inquire about his sexual needs and desires? If not, I suggest you begin the rehabilitation of your sexual mojo there.

Let me ask you a few pointed questions. Could you guys invite a third party to join you as a periodic sexual playmate? Ya know what they say; “Twosies beat onesies, but nothing be threes.”

How about a little role-playing, a new sex toy, or something kinky, maybe some BDSM perhaps. It’s easy to lose interest in sex when the play is boring, repetitive and ho-hum.

Here’s what I want you guys to do, and I do mean both of you. I want you to mozie on over to my online sex emporium and pick out something new and interesting. Look for the MY STOCKROOM banner in the sidebar for access to this great resource. I want you to pick something for him and I want him to pick something for you.

sexy daddiesI’ve put together a dazzling array of products that will liven up even the most humdrum sex life. Pay particular attention to the COUPLES section of My Stockroom. You’ll find loads of interesting things for couples of every stripe.

Still not sure what to buy? Take a look at my ever so popular adult product review site, Dr Dick’s Sex Toy Reviews.

There are several sex manuals available in MY STOCKROOM, and even more elsewhere online. You could consult one of them for ideas if you can’t tap into your own god-given queer creativity.

Just in case this hasn’t crossed your mind, us men folk go through physiological and hormonal changes in midlife, just like women do. There’s even a name for it — andropause — the male menopause as it were. http://www.drdicksextoyreviews.com/ As we age, both women and men need more time and stimulation to get aroused. So keep that in mind as you shop for your new sexual accessories. Look for things that will enhance and extend the arousal phase of sex play.sexy daddies 02

Increased focus on sensuality, intimacy, and communication will help a sexual relationship stay rich and rewarding even well into one’s senior years. If you’re not talking to you partner about the issues as they arise; you are missing an opportunity to course-correct at the most beneficial time, while the issue is front and center. Need some help communicating? Why not connect with a sex-positive therapist in your area for a little refresher course.

If your old man is avoiding butt fucking because of his knees, you guys might consider trying a new position, one that won’t involve him being on his knees. Look for my tutorial on sex positions: Basic Sexual Positions For One And All! And if that don’t solve your problem, there are still many ways of expressing his ardor that don’t involve his knees. How about some sensual massage, erotic bondage, or some good old-fashioned mutual masturbation with a swell new sex toy like the Fleshlight?

Remember sex oughta be an adventure even for an old “married” couple like you guys. If you don’t take all the opportunities to make things adventurous as they present themselves, you will find that these opportunities will simply vanish. And you’ll be shit out of luck then, darlin’.

Good Luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Foreskin freak outs!

Hey sex fans,

I know what you’re thinkin’: Hey Dr Dick, what’s up with your podcasts? Well I’ll tell ya. It’s true I haven’t posted a podcast in two weeks. But there’s a good reason. I’ve been busy, damnit! I have a new book coming out in a matter of days and all my energies have been focused in that direction. Gettin’ a book published is like birthin’ babies, don’t cha know.

That being said, I have put together a fantastic line up of guests for my show that will delight and amaze you. And my stellar guest list will take us into the fall. So stay tuned; podcasts will resume next week, Monday, 07/15/13.

To tide you over till then, I have some interesting Q&A from all over the freakin world.

Jerome and Conor, an American and an Englishman. each present a similar problem.

Name: Jerome
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Location: CA
Dr Dick, I have an uncut penis and when I’m in the shower and my foreskin is pulled back, the head of my dick hurts pretty bad from the falling water. The shower is not heavily pressurized, but it still hurts. Any answers?

AND

Name: Conor
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Location: London
My helmet is really sensitive I think it is because it is never really exposed because it is always behind my foreskin. How do I make it become less sensitive? Thanks

You boys have got your work cut out for you with the whole desensitizing thing, don’t cha know. Ya see, the more bodyasart5420you expose your sensitive dickhead to direct stimulation, be it touch or whatever, the less sensitive it will become.

I realize this isn’t gonna be all that pleasurable, at least not in the short-run, but you will find that in a matter of days this hypersensitivity will begin to reverse itself and pleasure will replace discomfort. Jerome, you have the right idea with the shower thing. However, you might want to try buffering your dickhead with a thin piece of fabric, like a handkerchief, at first. Once you can tolerate that level of sensation, remove the cloth and let the shower flow hit you dickhead directly. Make sure you do this daily for as long as you can stand it. Like I said, this will help desensitize your dickhead in a matter of days.

Once you’re out of the shower apply some nice lotion to your cockhead. This will diminish some the sensitivity. It will also help your fingers move easily on and around it.

Make sure that you fully retract your foreskin each time you jerk off. Every time you come in contact with your glans you will be desensitizing it. Patience and perseverance are the keys to making this happen in a relatively short period of time. If you are conscientious about this you will notice a difference in sensitivity in just a matter of days. Remember, it’ll be a no pain/no gain sorta thing, at least at the beginning.

To assist you in this process, you might consider trying a desensitizing lotion or cream to reduce some of the hypersensitivity. Some of these products are sold as a means of increasing ejaculatory control. But they also work for problem sensitivity too. Ya see these lotions and creams will have a “numbing effect” on your cock. If you choose to use one of these products, use it sparingly and only for a limited time.

If you check out MY STOCKROOM you will find several such products. Look for Boy Butter Extreme. It’s a desensitizing water-based lube, which contains 7.5% benzocaine; a strong local anesthetic, the maximum amount allowed by law.

Or look for Analyse Me! Anal Comfort Spray. Obviously, this is a product developed to desensitize your butt hole before fucking. But again, this will work on your dickhead as well. This product is lidocaine and benzocaine free.

Good luck you guys

A_Foreskin_Retraction_Series

Name: Saukha
Gender: Male
Age: 27
Location: India
Hi Doc, My problem is a stiff / tight frenulum. For past few months whenever I make love with my wife, it hurts, feels like something slightly rips, after applying anti-fungal ointments it gets ok but when we do it again it reoccurs and hurts when I wash my penis with plain water. IS there any ointment or cream, which would help frenulum to get more stretchable? Or is circumcision the only answer to my problem as we are planning for a family and don’t wanna go under the knife (if something goes wrong), just a bit scared for it. Please help and guide. Thanks a lot in advance.

Why are you using an anti-fungal ointment? Do you have some kind of a skin condition that requires you to use a use an anti-fungal treatment under your foreskin? If you don’t, you are probably adding to your problems by using this stuff. An anti-fungal ointment will dry out your skin, particularly under your foreskin. And that sounds like your problem right there.

Are you using a nice personal lube when you fuck? If not, that’s what you need to introduce into your lovemaking. This will not just be for you, of course. It’ll also for you lovely wife. A nice silicone-based or water-based lube will work wonders on your dick and it will assist in your wife’s comfort too. Please, give it a try.

There’s no reason you should have to consider circumcision. But the proper care and upkeep of your foreskin is essential to a properly functioning natural cock. I’ve written and spoken extensively about this. Go to the CATEGORIES section in the sidebar and look under the heading Body Issues for the subcategory — Foreskin. There’s loads of information there.

You probably saw the comments I made to the two guys right above, right? A desensitizing cream or lotion might help you too. But whatever you do, stop drying out the delicate tissue under your foreskin.

Good luck

FRUSTRATED!!

Name: Isabel
Gender: Female
Age: 24
Location: Olympia WA
HI, my guy and I have been together for five years now and he is 29 now. Of course in the beginning we were all over each other, but now (five years later) he can go months with out even thinking about sex. And of course I am going crazy for it. He says me pining for sex is a turn off but I cant help it. He thinks its normal, but I know its not. I don’t know how to get him in the mood. I’ve tried going down on him at night, romantic dinners, porn, and sucking up to his ego. But still to no avail. I know he’s straight. I am sure there are some things that contribute to his lack of interest. Like he was raised Mormon, and in some regards holds women on a pedestal. So what would you advise me to do? What can I do to help him get hornier?

You’re right, darlin’, it ain’t normal! A guy in his 20’s, albeit his late, late 20’s, who has no libido…that’s just downright odd.sexual-Frustration

So let’s say for the sake of argument that you’re right, he is straight as can be (no secret cock on the side). And he can go months without showing any interest in sex? Come on! If he had been like this from the get go, we could make the case that he just doesn’t have an interest in sex. That’s not particularly uncommon. But to go from a vigorous sex live to virtually none in a few years, that’s fishy. Are you confident that he is still attracted to you? Sometimes a guy would rather a life of quiet desperation than tell his GF that he’s no longer into her in a sexual sort of way.

Is he experiencing any health problems? Is he overweight, diabetic? Is he on any prescribed meds? Is he smoking too much pot, consuming too much booze? Is he overworked on the job? Is he sleep deprived? All these things can impact on a dude’s sex drive. I’d recommend he see his physician for some blood work to check his testosterone levels. Sometime a guy’s hormone levels can take a nosedive without him knowing it.

Finally, to your question…what can you do to help him get hornier? Probably nothing beyond what you’ve already tried, unless you suggest a sex therapist. If a surprise blowjob, a romantic dinner, porn and even an ego boost don’t do the trick, and he says no to therapy, then I’d say he’s a lost cause. Time to take your needs to someone with a little more lead in his pencil, if ya know what I mean. None of us should have to beg for our bone.

Good luck

Name: Amber
Gender: Female
Age: 20
Location: Fort Worth, TX
When me and my husband have sex he just seems to want to get it over with. I don’t ask him for it because every time I do ask him he’s not in the mood. He wont even try to help me warm up I have to do it all myself. I even do everything to him that he asks me. He also seems like he doesn’t want to please me because I’ll tell him ways to make it easier and positions I like and he just ignores me and goes on the way he wants it. When we first met sex was amazing and now sex is literally a 2-minute session just for him. What do I do to get him to help me out too?

sexual-frustration-1See my response to Isabel, right above you.

And to that I would add that if your man is not being mutual in your sex play he’s not playing fair. And not to mince words, but your husband sounds downright abusive. Marriage does not give a person license to ignore, reject or abuse. I’m not one for ultimatums, but the longer you tolerate his behavior, the more obstinate he will become. Give him a choice, either work with you to find a happy solution to this or you are gone.

Good Luck

Name: Mario
Gender: Male
Age: 17
Location: CA
I watch porn once in a while and have noticed that when I have an erection I get the “precum” after a while of having the erection. The problem is that lots of precum leaks out and it’s embarrassing for me when I’m with a girl. They usually get grossed out and stop oral sex. Will the precum go away with time or will this happen to me forever?

Ahhh, the heartbreak of pesky precum drip! I used to know this guy that dripped like a broken faucet and all he had to do was think about a woman’s tits. It was absolutely amazing. When I knew him he was at his first job as a teller in a bank in downtown San Francisco. If there was so much as a woman in line with a low cut blouse and a bit of cleavage precum012showing, he was done for. He could feel his juice drip down his leg. He tried many things to keep his heartbreak from being so obvious — he would wear baggy pants, double up on underwear, he’d stuff his junk in a sock and wear a jock over the sock under his underwear. That worked, but it was uncomfortable. Finally he discovered his own personal solution — he pulled his foreskin over the head of his dick and put a little rubber band over the end. This way his juice would build up inside his hood until he released the rubber band. Now that was creative thinking. I’ll admit this guy was unusual with his prodigious cock dribble, but he was young, only in his late teens, but his “problem” did subside with time.

This whole phenomenon is not unlike a person with a heavy perspiration problem. You know the guys, the ones who run with sweat from every pour at slightest amount of stress or effort. For most, this happens during puberty and early adulthood, but it doesn’t last.

Listen, pup, I know it might be a bit embarrassing, but it’s really very natural. I encourage you to just go with the flow…no pun intended. The more you worry about it the more it will plague you and in time you will become so self-conscious about it, it will cause performance anxiety. Think of it this way; consider yourself lucky, all that precum is a swell natural lubricant. Ya know some women have a similar concern with an abundance of vaginal liberation produced during arousal. But believe me, it always way better to have too much than not enough.

To your concern that some girls get grossed out by your leaky dick, well all I can say is they’re no connoisseur of cocksucking. Because those in the know consider precum the Nectar of the Gods!

Good luck

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