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So Ya Wanna Be A World-Class Cocksucker



What’s up with the current lamentable state of cock sucking these days? Why, I can remember a time when the humble hummer was king. Now, sadly the basic blowjob is a lost art.

Dr. Dick is forever getting letters from all over, from both men and women, asking for his sage advice. Dear Dr. Dick, Help! I don’t now what it is, I can’t seem to get the hang of fellatio. FELLATIO? Are you serious? Keep referring to cock sucking like that and we’re gonna take away your adult card. And then there are the letters frombj-1.jpg disappointed aficionados of excellent head. Dear Dr. Dick, Help! My boyfriend sucks dick like a girl. He’s afraid to get down and dirty on my big old dick. Yeah, ain’t it a shame? Ya know, there are those who believe an expert cocksucker is born not make. Either you can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch or ya can’t. However, Dr. Dick believes anyone can become an adequate or even a superior cocksucker with a little will power and some ingenuity.

Let’s start with the basics. There’s no one best way to make oral love to a boner. No two cocksuckers do it exactly the same way, but all have one thing in common and that’s the desire to satisfy. Technique and position take a back seat to simply craving a 9167735.jpgcock in your mouth. We’re not talkin’ rocket science, girlfriend, it’s just a pecker and a mouth doin’ what comes natural. So if cock sucking is more work than fun, just give it up. Life is too short for a bad blowjob.

Begin by taking a good look at the object of your desire. A big stiff woody is a wonder to behold. And even those little willies can be cute as hell. Visually explore the whole enchilada. Feel it’s shape, its thickness and texture. Use your tongue to trace a line from his dick head down the underside of his shaft to his balls. If you’re lucky enough to be gobbling an uncut dick, draw back his foreskin and slop your tongue all around his corona. As you do, watch your man’s eyes roll back in his head in ecstasy.0213.jpg

Let his cock slide inside your mouth. Let your lips slide over the head and down the shaft a little, but, for god’s sake, watch out for your teeth! Slide your mouth down farther and open wider. Feel the stretch in your jaws. When his dick gets close to your throat, you may begin to gag. This is a normal reflex that you will, in time, be able to control. Ask for some feedback on your efforts. Just don’t talk with your mouth full.

There are lots of other things you can do with your mouth. Lick his dick, suck on it and flick your tongue rapidly across the top of his dick. Or you can simply move your mouth up and down his joystick. Dive into his crotch, lick his inner thighs, lower belly, and slobber all over his nuts. Keep your mouth wet, a thick wad of saliva will add to the pleasure and eliminate irritation. Don’t be afraid to be sloppy. Increase your speed or slow it down. Incorporate a little manual stimulation if ya’d like. Fondle and bj01.jpgcup his balls in your hand.

As your man approaches orgasm he will become more excited and may start some pelvic thrusting. If he does and you start to gag, use your hand to guide his dick in and out of your mouth. Remember that you’re the one in charge here. Encircle your lips firmly around his cock and over your teeth. Keep the other parts of your mouth as relaxed as possible (actual “sucking” is unnecessary at this point). Keeping a regular rhythm is nice, but don’t let it get boring. If you vary your position and your stroke you won’t get fatigued.

Remember practice makes perfect. Above all take the time you need to learn what works best for you.

Learnin’ to Smoke Some Pole

Name: Janet
Gender: Female
Age: 18
Location: Reno, Nevada
I’ve never performed oral sex on a man before and now I am with a new man and he sometimes hints that he would like me to go down on him. But I’m scared to do so because I don’t really know what to do or if I’ll be doing it right and I’m scared that he might laugh or something. Can you please give me some advice for a first timer on oral sex??

blowjobJanet, darling, you are totally in luck. Ol’ Dr Dick has squandered many an hour composing witty postings and charming podcasts on this very topic. Check it out. Look over to your right. See the CATEGORY pull down menu? Good! Now scroll down till you find the main Category — Oral. (Everything is alphabetized.) Under this main heading you will discover “Blow Job” and “Fellatio.” There are also a number of other fun and informative topics there, like gag reflex and cunnilingus. Speaking of which, I hope this new man of yours is gonna return the oral favor once he gets his hummer. Don’t settle for less. If he wants some hot oral action, he better be able give some hot oral action. It’s only right, right?

So as you can see, there’s loads (you should pardon the pun) of good stuff, written and spoken, about the wonderful world of oral sex. Click on any of the Oral subcategories to find just about every word I’ve written about this scrumptious topic.

Or you can simply cut to the chase and read my Sexual Enrichment Tutorial: So Ya Wanna Be A World-Class Cocksucker.

Either way, you’ll be smokin’ yourself some fine pole, like a real champion, in no time at all.

Good luck

Review: An Intimate Life: Sex, Love and My Journey as a Surrogate Partner

Hey sex fans!

I have another swell sex-positive book to tell you about today. Anyone who frequents this site will already be familiar with my dear friend and esteemed colleague, Cheryl Cohen Greene. If ya don’t believe me type her name into the search function in the sidebar to your right and PRESTO!

Not only will you find the fabulous two-part SEX WISDOM podcast we did together, (Part 1 is HERE! And Part 1 is HERE!) you will find a posting about the movie The Sessions. You’ve seen it right? It’s the award-winning film staring John Hawkes, Helen Hunt, and William H. Macy. It’s the story of a man in an iron lung who wishes to lose his virginity.  He contacts a professional surrogate partner with the help of his therapist and priest. Ms. Hunt plays Cheryl, the surrogate partner in the movie

Cheryl also contributed a chapter on sex and intimacy concerns for sick, elder and dying people for my book, The Amateur’s Guide To Death And Dying.

With all that as a preface, I now offer you Cheryl’s own story: An Intimate Life: Sex, Love, and My Journey as a Surrogate Partner. The first thing I want to say is this book is it’s not a clinical or technical tome. It is an easily accessible memoir. And that, to my mind, is what makes it so fascinating.

She writes in the Introduction:An Intimate Life

I started this work in 1973, and my journey to it spans our society’s sexual revolution and my own. I grew up in the ‘40s and ‘50s, a time when sex education was—to put it mildly— lacking. As I educated myself, I found that most of what I had been taught about sex was distorted or wrong. The lessons came from the playground, the church, and the media. My parents could barely talk about sex, much less inform me about it.

What follows is a candid and often funny look into the personal and professional life of a woman on the cutting edge of our culture’s movement toward sexual wellbeing.

Cheryl comes out of her conservative Catholic upbringing and her often tortured family dynamics with what one would expect—her own sexual awakenings as well as the conspiracy of ignorance and repression that wanted to stifle it. This is a common story, the story of so many of us.

Starting when I was around ten, I masturbated and brought myself to orgasm nearly every night. … If my nights began with anxiety, my days began with guilt. I became convinced that every earache, every toothache, every injury was God punishing me. … I couldn’t escape his gaze or his wrath. Sometimes I imagined my guardian angel looked away in disgust as I touched myself and rocked back and forth in my bed.

The miracle here is that this troubled tween would blossom into the remarkable sexologist she is today.

rsz_1greenecherylSome of the chapters in her book describe one or another of her hands on therapeutic encounters as a surrogate partner, but equally important and compelling are the chapters that describe Cheryl’s own sexual struggles as she moved to adulthood and beyond. Cheryl’s acceptance of her own sexuality enables her to build a career out of helping others do the very same thing.

Everyone has a right to satisfying, loving sex, and, in my experience, that most often flows from strong communication, self-respect, and a willingness to explore.

Despite the frank discussion of sexual topics within the book, there is no prurience or sensationalism. For the most part, Cheryl’s clients are regular people, mostly men, who have pretty ordinary problems—erection and/or ejaculation concerns, dating difficulties, as well as self-esteem, guilt and shame issues. Cheryl helps each of her clients with the efficiency and confidence of the world-class sex educator she is. Most of her interaction involves her supplying her clients with some much-needed information, dispelling myths, and giving them permission to experiment. As she says;

I continue to be amazed at how solid education delivered without judgment can eradicate much of the guilt and shame that turns life in the bedroom into a struggle instead of a pleasure.

Her most famous client, Mark O’Brien, the 36-six-year-old man who had spent most of his life in an iron lung after contracting polio at age 6, was the author of How I Became a Human Being: A Disabled Man’s Quest for Independence, in which he writes about his experience with Cheryl. This, of course, was adapted into a film, The Sessions, which I mentioned above. For her part, Cheryl delivers a most poignant remembrance of Mark early in her book.

I explained Sensual Touch to Mark. Although he was paralyzed, he still had sensation all over his body, so he would feel my hands moving up and down. … I encouraged him to try and recognize four common reactions: feeling neutral, feeling nurtured, feeling sensual and feeling sexual.

An Intimate Life chronicles Cheryl’s life-long interest in human sexuality. Her life and sometimes-turbulent loves are on display, but in the most considerate fashion. She teaches by example. She’s even able to speak with great compassion of her time living with and through cancer.

As I inch toward seventy, I appreciate more and more how much I have to be grateful for and how fortunate I’ve been. I was lucky to find a wonderful career and to be surrounded by so many smart, adventurous, caring people. My personal sexual revolution auspiciously paralleled our culture’s, and in many ways was made possible by it. I am eternally grateful to the pioneers, rebels, and dreamers who made our society a little safer for women who embrace their sexuality.

There is so much I loved about this book, but mostly it’s the humanity I found in abundance. Cheryl’sdr.-cheryl-cohen-greene enlightened soul shines brightly from every page. Her no nonsense approach to all things sexual is an inspiration. And her perseverance to bring surrogate partner therapy into the mainstream is laudable.

…what separates surrogates from prostitutes is significant. When people have difficulties grasping [that], I turn to my beloved and late friend Steven Brown’s cooking analogy that I’ve so often relied on to help me through that question: Seeing a prostitute is like going to a restaurant. Seeing a surrogate is like going to culinary school.

Finally, An Intimate Life is the culmination of Cheryl’s life as a sex educator, her surrogate partner therapy practice being just part of that mission. I highly recommend you read this book. You will, I assure you, come away from it as I have, a better person—enriched, informed, as well as entertained.

Cheryl, thank you for being in my life and being such an abiding inspiration. Thank you too for this marvelous book; now you can be in the lives of so many others who need you so that you can inspire them along their way.

Be sure to visit Cheryl on her site HERE!

Show him around, why don’t cha?

Name: Frankie
Gender: Female
Age: 27
Location: Juneau
Dr. Dick, I have been married for about 6 years and my husband and I have a great relationship. But I’m unsatisfied with our sex life. Here’s the thing. When I masturbate I cum, but I don’t when I have sex with my husband. When I was in college I had a NSA (no strings attached) sexual relationship with this guy. Neither one of us had an emotion attachment to the other, but it was great sex. Is it possible the reason I can’t cum with my husband is a breakdown between my emotions and my orgasms?

I think you’re asking if it is possible for a person to get off with a relative stranger (a NSA kinda connection), but have difficulty fully enjoying sex with someone they truly love. Is that about the size of it?

If I’m on target here, than the answer is yes, absolutely. This is more likely to be a bugaboo for women than men, but a lotta people experience a disconnect between sex and intimacy for one reason or another. If you can get off on your own and/or in a zip less fuck, but not with your old man, then I’d say you might be experiencing such a rift.bound_male.03

Sometime this has to do with upbringing. If you were socialized as a girl to believe that sex is dirty, or at least not particularly wholesome; then you may find it difficult putting love and sex together. Or if you were taught as a girl to think that women who enjoy sex are whores; then you may find it difficult putting devotion and passion together.

Of course, your problem might simply be that your college beau was a much better cocksmith than your hubby. He may have had the key, so to speak, to unlocking your orgasm.

Let’s start here. On the scale of 1-10, 10 being “World-Class Lover,” how would you rate your husband? If he is less then an 8, you’re gonna have to show him how to become a 10. Since many women require direct clitoral stimulation to get off, I suggest you have your old man stimulate your clitoris with his mouth, fingers or a vibrator. Have him do this before, during after, or even instead of fucking. Also, you gotta let him know precisely the way you like and need to be touched. This will go a long way towards increasing your sexual pleasure and satisfaction, which is the foundation to having orgasms. He will benefit too and become a much better lover.

restraintsThis is why I’m such a big proponent of mutual masturbation, even…or should I say especially…for folks in exclusive and long-term relationships. I like to think of it as a way of checking in with one another about the all important arousal stage of our sexual response cycle, which changes with time. Do yourself a favor and invite your hubby to a little show. If you think you might be a wee bit shy for just dropping trou and jilling-off for him, make this part of your sex play. Try a little erotic bondage; have him sit up in a chair or lie back in bed. Restrain his hands and arms and possibly his legs and feet as well using a belt, necktie, or silk scarf.

When you’re certain he won’t be able to use his hands to reach for you while you’re doing your show and tell, let the tour of your lady parts begin. Straddle his chest or lap, and bring your pussy up close to his face. Start by pointing out all the amazing features of your own unique vulva. Make this part instructional, but also naughty too. Stick your fingers in your hubby’s mouth and get them all slick with spit, then finger yourself. Get your own juices flowing and diddle your clit. It’ll be the most fantastic lap (face) dance he’ll ever have.

This is the ideal time for some dirty talk or reading erotic aloud. The more tuned on you are the better it will be for him too. Show him how you bring yourself to orgasm. Feel free to include lots of lube and a toy or two. Remember, this is all about you, but for his benefit. I can assure you it will be instructive for him and liberating for you. And most of all it will be hot, steamy fun for you both. And it won’t involve fucking. Once you’ve gotten yourself off a time or two, undo his restraints and let him do the same to and for you. Who know what wonderfully erotic doors will open for you both through this exercise.

Good luck

Take a look at all the interesting and smutty stuff I’ve collected on my new Tumbler page HERE!

Boys Will Be Boys

Name: James
Gender: Male
Age: 19
I want to know if I should have sex with a man for the first time.

Well gee, darlin’, I suppose that would all depend on if you are into man-sex or not. If you are, I suppose having your first encounter will be like falling off a log. However, if you’re not into gay sex, then why would you even be considering such a thing.boys kissing

For the sake of argument, let’s just say you are into some hot man-on-man action, or think you are. If that’s the case, I have some questions. Do you have a particular partner in mind? If you do, what is it about this guy that makes you want to get physical with him? If you’re honest with yourself about this, you will probably be able to determine what kind of sexual contact you want to have with the dude. Which brings me to my next set of questions.

What kind of gay sex are you looking to experiment with? Something light, like kissing, making out, mutual masturbation, shared hand-jobs? For more information on this, check out my swell tutorial about hand jobs titled: The Art Of The Humble Hand Job.

Perhaps you’re looking to be a bit more adventurous, like cock sucking. That’s great too. But wait! Would you know how to smoke some pole with grace and ease? If not, check out my tutorial: So Ya Wanna Be A World-Class Cocksucker …Or How To Give The Perfect Blow Job. To find this brilliant expose and lots more information about the humble hummer, go to the CATEGORY pull down menu in the sidebar and look for “ORAL.” Then look for Cock Sucking.

Maybe you’re considering butt fucking. That’s a bit advanced for the gay sex novice, but it’s not unheard of. If I were you, I’d return to the CATEGORY pull down menu in the sidebar and check out the heading “ANAL”. There you will be treated to loads of information about being a good top, like my tutorial, Finessing That Ass Fuck — A Tutorial For a Top. As well as my tutorial for being a good bottom, Liberating The B.O.B Within.

There’s only one thing you absolutely need to know when it comes to ass fuckin, regardless of what position floats your boat. Be sure that whoever is on top uses a condom. And if you don’t know why you need to do that, then darlin’, you’re just not ready for sex with any kind of partner…same sex or otherwise.

Good luck

Name: Tony
Gender: Male
Age: 24
I’m trying to find out how to get ink marks off my dick without hurting my dickhead.

Whoops! Looks like you need to reevaluate the company you keep when you drink to the point of passing out, my friend.

I realize writin’ shit on a guy’s johnson while he’s unconscious is a hilarious practical joke among the frat-boy crowd. I mean, what could be funnier, right? Of course being on the receiving end of this little prank, like our friend Tony here, is considerably less comical.

i enjoy penisRidding oneself of ink marks, particularly the indelible variety, from one’s privates is a pain — both literally and figuratively. The best one can say about this clean-up chore is that it will probably cure the guy of binge drinking, at least with a bunch of rowdy adolescent-minded companions with Sharpie markers and too much time on their hands.

OK, Tony, here’s what you do. First, apply a liberal coat of baby oil or mineral oil to the effected area. Take your time massaging the oil into your skin. You may discover that this oily massage gives you a woody. That may be the silver lining to your ink-stained cloud. Actually having an erection will help expand the skin of your dickhead and allow the mineral oil to better penetrate the skin. The oil will sink into your skin and help lift the ink stain to the surface.

Follow this part of the treatment with lots of warm soap and water. You should see ink stain lessening.

Next, massage in a liberal mount of rubbing alcohol. Follow this with more warm soap and water.

Continue alternating between mineral oil followed by soap and water and rubbing alcohol followed by soap and water. Always ending the treatment with the soap and water part. A couple applications like this should do the trick. I would, however, recommend that you be as gentle as possible. If the satin persists after two such applications, give your prick a day to rest before attacking the stain again.

Good luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

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