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Nothing beats threes

David
My wife and I have wanted to add a third person to our relationship. Would you have any advice for us on how we could do this? Is this something that you could assist us with? We are in our mid forties and wanting to do this with someone we can trust.
Please help.

Hey David, try using the search feature in the header. Type in 3-way and/or swinger. You’ll find a wealth of information (both written and audio) on the topic you raise.

Here’s a taste of what you will find:3way-78516707835_xlarge

Trying new things can be really fun especially when your playing with people you like and are turned on by. I’d suggest you keep the event light and breezy. Too many people try to script a 3-way to within an inch of its life, and that can ruin the whole damn thing. At the same time, just hooking up for quick shag can be a little too impersonal.

There is another way. I suggest that you, your wife and the potential partner start your encounter by getting a bite to eat together. A little food and a couple cocktails can be a great start to the adventure. No doubt all three of you will be a little nervous, so make this part of the outing sexy and flirtatious. Each of you could practice your seduction skills on each other. In doing so, you will soon discover the sexual hierarchy…and there always is one in these kinds of encounters. If there are any ground rules for the encounter, this is the time to mention them. You and your wife should have discussed this ahead of time. The more you discover about your potential partner in this non-sexual, but seductive environment the more prepared ya’ll will be for how the rest of the evening will play itself out.

If it were I, I’d want to get a sense of how experienced the other person is at having a 3-way. Other important questions; are either you or your wife bisexual? Is the person you are inviting to join you bisexual? If the answer to either of these questions is yes, you can be assured that the dynamic of the 3-way will be fundamentally different than if none or only one of you is bi.

Be sure to inquire about the sexual fantasies of your prospective partner and share some of your own. In most situations, all the partners in a ménage are equal. Make sure that your potential play partner knows what turns each of you on. You’d be wise to know in advance what turns him/her on as well. That will make the event go a whole lot smoother.

There are some fine videos in my How To Video Library on the topic. Look for the Video Library tab in the header, then search for 3-way or swinger.

Here’s another tip: I’ve done several podcasts with seasoned swingers. All these conversations are part of the Sex EDGE-U-cation show, don’t cha know. This series of interviews takes a look at the world of fetish sex, kink and alternative lifestyles. We touch on topics both familiar and exotic. And I chat with prominent educators, practitioners and advocates of unconventional sexual expressions and lifestyles from all over the world. Here’s a fine example: The founder of Life On The Swingset, Cooper Beckett and his ever so lovely podcast co-host, Ginger. All these conversations about consensual non-monogamy are fun and informative. Don’t miss miss them!

Good luck

The Erotic Mind of Sacchi Green — Podcast #424 — 07/07/14


Hey sex fans, welcome back.

I have a tasty treat in store for today’s edition of The Erotic Mind show. We travel to the wilds of western Massachusetts to hobnob with an award-winning author.

Sacchi Green

As you probably know, this is the series where I chat with noted erotic artists, both visual and literary, from all over the freakin’ world. Today I welcome one of the giants of the world erotica scene. My guest today is none other than the brilliant author and editor, Sacchi Green.

Sacchi and I discuss:

  • Shout out to Cleis Press;
  • Her most recent award for Wild Girls, Wild Nights;
  • Being a strict, even ruthless editor, but always welcoming new talent;
  • The difference between writing for a series and editing a series;
  • Startling book covers;
  • Her mountain retreat;
  • Appearing in Penthouse;
  • The Lambda Literary Awards;
  • Writing from memory, writing true stories;
  • Getting turned on by the stories, an important part of judging erotica;
  • Her bibliography and her favorites among them;

Sacchi reads from “Pulling,” which appears in Lesbian Cowboys.

Sacchi invites you to visit her on her site HERE! Her Facebook page is HERE! And her LiveJournal page is HERE!

(Click on the cover art below to enjoy some of Sacchi’s outstanding work)

A Ride to Remember and Other Erotic Stories     Girl_Crazy     girl-fever-69-stories-of-sudden-sex     hard road     Lesbian_Lust     lesbian-cowboys-erotic-adventures     wild-girls-wild-nights-true-lesbian-sex-stories     time well bent     women in handcuffs

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Look for all my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Dr Dick’s Stockroom.

drdicksstockroom.jpg

Hot Or Not

Name: Zoey
Gender: Female
Age: 40
Location: Seattle
Hello
I was surprised when my husband said our sex was just ok. I was skipping along thinking it was great. Now I feel stupid. I asked what I could do to make it better, but he didn’t give me any suggestion. Can you help me understand what I am doing wrong. How can I figure this out on my own? Classes? Lectures? Palm reading. I’m at a loss and at my age I want to have a great sex life but not just me enjoying it.
Thanks so much for your time.

I have lots to say about this topic. And most all of it has to do with the notion of mutuality and reciprocity; ya know giving to get, mutual satisfaction, and all of that.hot in the sack

I encourage you to look around my site for all the help you need. Check out the CATEGORIES pull-down menu in the sidebar to your right. You will find a wealth of sexual enrichment topics there. In fact there’s even a specific category named precisely that. Under the main category: ENRICHMENT, there is a subcategory called — Sexual Enrichment.  There’s another subcategory just below that labeled — Spicing Up Your Sex Life.  Or you can simply use the search feature by typing in the key words: sexual enrichment. I’ve made it that easy! And everything in the pull-down menu is alphabetized for your convenience.

Regardless on how you get there, you will find posting and podcasts aplenty on an array of topics.

Be sure to check out my Product Reviews site, Dr Dick Sex Toy Reviews for great toy suggestions and other fun stuff to liven up a ho-hum sex life.

Don’t miss Dr Dick’s Stockroom.

Another great resource is Dr Dick’s How To Video Library.  The mind boggles at all the stuff you could learn there. And you’ll be learning from the pros too.

Finally, a word of advice to you. If you think you’re having hot sex, you probably are. If your partner or partners don’t think so; its up to them to work out a plan, with you, that will satisfy them more fully. Anyone who tells you that sex with you is merely OK, but won’t volunteer suggestions on how to make it better; is fuckin’ with your head.

Great partnered sex is the responsibility of both partners.

Good luck

Early Summer 2014 Q&A Show— Podcast #423 — 06/30/14


Hey sex fans,

My inbox is overflowing, so it’s time to turn our attention to the sexually worrisome in our audience. I have another swell sweet crackQ&A show in store for you today. Each of my correspondents is eager to share his or her sex and relationship concerns with us. And I will do my level best to make my responses informative, enriching and maybe even a little entertaining.

  • Bluetail Man ain’t gettin’ any at home so he’s thinkin’ about takin’ his needs elsewhere.
  • Mike is saddled with a meth monkey and we have an exchange about that.
  • Hanson is into pain; he wants to know if that’s normal. He and I have an exchange about that.
  • Ted wants his GF to give up her booty; she doesn’t want to.  We have an exchange about that
  • Sean is afraid his kinks will get him in trouble. He and I have an exchange about that.
  • Anonymous is filled with fear, rage, and lust.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Dr Dick’s Sex Advice and Dr Dick’s Sex Toy Reviews.

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Look for my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously, or just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

A Twofer Today

A couple of young lads with foreskin problems thousands of miles apart.

Name: Tom
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Location: California
Whenever I see the penises of other guys their skin always goes back exposing their head when they have an erection. When I’m hard my skin never goes all the way back. My head is always covered even when I have an erection and when I try to pull the skin back it wont. Is this normal?

and

Name: Matt
Gender: Male
Age: 16
Location: England
Hi, i’ve got a problem with my foreskin. when my penis is erect the foreskin doesn’t pull back over the head of my penis. I was wondering if this is easily corrected or will I need to be circumcised.

Let’s start at beginning, shall we? When us boys are born we all have a foreskin. A good portion of us will have our unit 4-Foreskin-stretchingseriously altered within days of showing up on the scene. Someone, possibly with good intentions, will lops off 50% of our cock skin and call it a day. I know, cuckoo, huh? Well, be that as it may, those of us who escape this dastardly deed have a foreskin, but it’s only open enough to pee through. And it only opens more if it’s stretched, and it only gets stretched if the owner of that foreskin pulls it back over his dickhead. No foreskin ever opens by itself; it gets gradually stretched open over time either intentionally or just through normal use.

Most little boys soon discover that pulling back their foreskin feels really good. After all, this unique piece of skin is chock full of nerve endings that register loads of delicious pleasure. A lad’s foreskin needs to be pushed back regularly, in order to stretch it open, and to keep it from shrinking shut again. It is important that the boy do this himself, so that it is pushed only as far back as feels comfortable to him.

Of course, there in lies the rub, so to speak. The sex-negative pressures of the prevailing culture, both here in the good old U.S. of A. as well as abroad, frown upon self-induced pleasure of any sort; even if it is associated with personal hygiene and necessary bodily upkeep. So most boys get the message that fiddlin’ around down there, even for the purpose of essential maintenance is a no-no. Simply put, without manual stretching a kid’s skin can actually shrink, closing up again.

foreskin stretch01As a young fella approaches puberty there is, as we all know, a growth spurt. What most of us fail to take into account is that along with his legs, arms, torso, head and feet, his cock is also growing. His dickhead is increasing in size, and if the kid hasn’t established a healthy routine of foreskin stretching there is gonna be trouble, like what’s happening for you guys.

Since parents are not likely to encourage self-discovery of this sort, nor are they inclined to show their young uncut sons how to properly care for this exceptional body part, the kid remains clueless till a problem arises. Wouldn’t it be so much simpler, as well as the responsible thing to do, for all parents with intact boys to pass on this priceless nugget of wisdom. It would be so easy to do while the kids are enjoying their bath. Parents could show their boys how to retract this fold of skin so that it stays supple, as well as getting things rinsed out underneath. They could encourage their boys to always pull back their lace curtains when they pee. Merely the number of times a fella will handle himself to piss will automatically keep things more lubricated and elastic.Foreskin-Stretching-2

Ok, I’m gonna guess that neither of you weren’t instructed on the proper care of your natural cock. Am I right? So now ya’ll have some remedial work to do. Let’s start with a few foreskin stretching exercises.

Exercise 1 — While you’re dick is soft; retract your foreskin as far back as you can. Work two fingers in under your hood till you can touch the head of your dick. Now attempt to roll your hood forward and over your fingers. It’s like docking another dick, only you’re using your fingers. This exercise depends on you having your fingers inside your foreskin for it to be effective. In time you’ll be able to add three fingers, instead of just two. This will stretch your skin to the point you’ll be able to easily retract it over your erect dickhead.

foreskin stretchExercise 2 — Grab each side of the foreskin opening and gently pull each side apart. Stretch the opening till it’s stretched with a tension you can tolerate, but that is not actually painful. Hold for a count of 10 and release. Repeat for 5 sets of 10 pulls per day, more if you can handle it. Here’s a tip, these stretches are best done after soaking in a warm bath or a long hot shower.

Exercise 3 — This is a variation on exercise 1. Insert a smooth cylindrical object into your foreskin opening, like the cork from a wine bottle. This object needs to be just large enough to stretch the skin without pain. Once inserted, leave it there for as long as you can during the day, or for over night. As your foreskin stretches you want to swap the one object for another with a larger diameter. If a wine cork is too big to start with, consider a smaller smooth plastic rubber plugsdowel or a rubber bung plug. You can find these sorts of things at the hardware store. You might need to use a bit of surgical tape to keep these stretchers in place.

These exercises may sound a bit invasive or uncomfortable, and perhaps they will be at first. But don’t worry; you’ll live. In a short period of time you will have a much more pliable foreskin, one that you can retract at will and with ease. And when you’re sexually active with a partner, it will work flawlessly and exponentially increase your pleasure.

Good luck

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