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Sharing childcare ‘improves sex lives’ of couples

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Couple in bed

Sharing childcare makes for happier couples with better sex lives, US research suggests.

In a study of 487 families, parents who split childcare duties evenly reported greater satisfaction, both sexually and emotionally.

But in couples where the woman did most of the childcare, both men and women reported being less content.

The researchers said men doing a greater share of childcare did not have the same impact.

The conclusions have been drawn from a study called the 2006 Marital and Relationship Study, which was a survey into marriage and relationships among heterosexual couples.

Who does the childcare?

The data, being presented at a meeting of the American Sociological Association, shows that couples where the women performed more than 60% of childcare – specifically in terms of rule-making, praising and playing – fared the worst on scores of relationship satisfaction and conflict, as well as being less happy about the quality of their sex life.

The study leader, Dr Daniel Carlson, an assistant professor of sociology at Georgia State University, said: “One of the most important findings is that the only childcare arrangement that appears really problematic for the quality of both a couple’s relationship and sex life is when the woman does most or all of the childcare.”

The team found that fathers could in fact take on most or all of the childcare responsibilities without negatively affecting the quality of the couple’s relationship.

The study did not look at who performed tasks such as feeding and bathing the children.

The academics are planning more research into why those couples with more equal childcare responsibilities seem to have better relationships.

“We are trying to understand what is it about sharing that couples view so positively,” Dr Carlson added.

The ‘new man’

Prof Sir Cary Cooper, an expert in organisational psychology and health at Manchester Business School, said the findings made sense, but they might reveal more about the kind of couples who shared their responsibilities.

“If you have a ‘new’ man who is happy to share childcare, he probably invests more in the relationship anyway,” he said.

He added that it was becoming increasingly acceptable for men to opt for more flexible working and to take on more of the responsibility for family and domestic life.

“Increasingly there’s a lot of pressure on men who wouldn’t normally do that – the question is would that make a difference in the relationship. I think it could do.”

The 487 couples in the study were selected at random and included low-to-moderate income couples who had children living with them and where the woman was under 45 years.

A total of 605 couples were interviewed, but the researchers only included in this study those where both partners had completed the full survey.

Complete Article HERE!

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Why do half of women have fantasies about being raped?

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There’s a wide range of sexual fantasies people have, ranging from entirely unrealistic to applicable to real life, sex with Superman through to banging on a plane.

But the fantasy of being raped, also known as nonconsent and forced sex fantasies, is common.

Sexual fantasies let you explore your sexuality, they’re what we use to get off in those harsh, cold wifi-free winters, and we get to use them in roleplay scenarios to make our sex lives even more fulfilling.

But this common fantasy is one that few of us feel comfortable sharing. It puts people on edge and makes us feel a bit wrong.

Recent research indicates that between 31% and 57% of women have fantasies in which they are forced into sex against their will. For 9% to 17% of those women, rape fantasies are their favourite or most frequent sexual fantasy.

It’s natural if that makes you feel alarmed.

In real-life contexts, rape – meaning sex against your will – is deeply traumatising. It’s not at all ‘sexy’. It’s an intense violation that causes high levels of distress.

Content warning: Those who find discussions of rape and sexual assault may find this article triggering. 

It seems strange that we’d use rape as the basis for our sexual fantasies – and yet so many of us do.

And it’s incredibly important to note that while rape fantasies are common, this does not mean that women secretly want to be raped. There is a huge difference between acted out role-play, imagined scenarios, and real-life experiences. No one asks to be raped, no one deserves to be raped, and how common forced sex fantasies are in no way justifies unwanted sexual contact of any nature.

It’s difficult to know exactly what these fantasies entail, because, well, they’re going on in someone else’s mind.

But the women we spoke to mentioned that their fantasies of forced sex steered away from experiences that would be close to reality.

Rather than lines of consent being crossed by friends or bosses, we fantasise about high drama situations in which we are forced to have sex to survive, entering into sexual contracts rather than having our right to consent taken away from us outright.

Amy*, 26, says a common fantasy is being kidnapped and held hostage, then having one of the guards forcing her into sex to keep her safe.

Tasha, 24, fantasises about thieves breaking into her house and being so attracted to her they have to have sex with her against her will.

In both scenarios, the women said they start out by resisting advances, then begin to enjoy the sex midway through. It’s giving up the fight and giving in to desire that’s the turn on, rather than the very real trauma of real-life rape.

But for other women, fantasies are more true to life. For some it’s not about feigned struggle, but imagining consent and control being ripped away as a major turn on.

Why is this? Why are so many of us aroused by forced sex when we’d be horrified by the reality of it? Why do we find the idea of rejecting sex then doing it anyway a turn on?

Dr Michael Yates, clinical psychologist at the Havelock Clinic, explains that there are a few theories.

The first is that women’s fantasies of nonconsensual sex are down to lingering guilt and shame around female sexuality.

‘For centuries (and sadly still all too regularly today), young women are taught to hide sexual feelings or encouraged to fit narrow gender stereotypes of the acceptable ways that female sexuality can be expressed in society,’ Michael tells Metro.co.uk. ‘As a result sex and sexual feelings are often accompanied by anxiety, guilt or shame.

‘One theory is that rape fantasies allow women to reduce distress associated with sex, as they are not responsible for what occurs, therefore have less need to feel guilt or shame about acting upon their own sexual desires or feelings.’

Essentially, lingering feelings of shame around taking agency over our own sexual desires can make us want to transfer them on to another body, thus giving us permission to fantasise about sexual acts. In our minds, it’s not us doing it, it’s all the other person, meaning we don’t have to feel guilty or dirty.

This explains why most rape fantasies don’t tend to be extremely violent, and why the women I asked reported resisting at first before having an enjoyable experience (which real-life rape is definitely not).

‘More often than not, most people who have rape fantasies imagine a passionate scene with very little force, based around the “victim” being so desirable that the “rapist” cannot control themselves, while the victim generally does not feel the terror, confusion, rage and disgust of an actual rape,’ says Michael.

The second theory is down to the dominant narratives shown in media and porn. It’s suggested that because our media and porn so often show men being dominant and losing control around a meek, deeply attractive woman, that’s simply how we envision ideal sex in our fantasies.

Take a flip through classic erotic literature, or even just look at the covers, and you’ll be confronted by strong men grabbing weak, swooning women.

‘Although rarely do these novels portray rape or sexual assault explicitly, they do play into the idea of a female sexual role as succumbing to the dominant role of male sexuality,’ notes Michael. ‘One whereby men can act upon their sexual urges at the point they choose (with the female having little power to object).’

So that might be the why – but what about the who? Does having fantasies about being raped mean anything about us? Are certain types of women more likely to have fantasies of being raped?

As with most sexual fantasies, it’s really not something to panic about.

Complete Article HERE!

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Fun Where The Sun Don’t Shine!

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Hey sex fans!

It’s our first Product Review Friday of the new year. So HURRAY for that!

This week we have another wonderful product from our good friends over at We-Vibe. As you probably know, they have been part of this review effort since 2008 when we reviewed our first product of their line. Since then we’ve happily reviewed several of their others.

To keep track of all our reviews of the amazing products coming from We-Vibe, use the search function in the sidebar of DrDickSexToyReviews.com, type in We-Vibe, and PRESTO!

Back by popular demand, here are Dr Dick Review Crew members, Jack & Karen, to show and tell.

We-Vibe Ditto Vibrating Butt Plug —— $75.42

Jack & Karen
Karen: “Back by popular demand? Well, that one way of looking at it.”
Jack: “We begged and begged, is more like it.”
Karen: “We were so happy to be invited back to the Review Crew after so many years in the wilderness. And to come back just in time to review a marvelous We-Vibe product; well we were over the moon.”
Jack: “Hey, why not tease our audience with some of the particulars before passing judgment?”
Karen: “Sorry! It’s just that I love this little thing; I couldn’t help myself. Let me catch my breath and begin with the packaging, which I love. Whoops, I did it again.”
Jack: “OK, time out for you. I’ll do the packaging. Like all We-Vibe products the packaging is first rate, stylish, but understated. A nice petite cardboard box featuring an image of the Ditto opens to reveal your Ditto and it’s remote. A USB charger cable, a small packet of lube, instructions and a storage bag are nestled under the toy.”
Karen: “Oh My God! I said when I first saw it. It’s a butt plug!”
Jack: “My wife is so freakin’ clever!”
Karen: “This would be my first foray into the world of anal pleasuring and I was a wee bit nervous.”
Jack: “But she persevered!”
Karen: “You’re so funny. Listen, I don’t want to get ahead of myself again. So I’ll slow down. You already know that the Ditto is rechargeable, since Jack mentioned the USB charger cable. Well, it’s super easy to charge and charging it for 90 minutes will give you 2 hours of playtime. The Ditto is made from smooth, seam-free velvety, latex-free, nonporous, phthalate-free, and hypoallergenic silicone with a matt finish. It’s totally waterproof too. And since this is gonna go where the sun don’t shine, so to speak, the water based lube sample packet will come in very handy. You’ll want to stock up on water-based lube if you don’t have a cupboard full, like we do, because every time you use the Ditto you’ll want to use some. Remember, your butthole isn’t like your vagina; there is no natural lubrication down there.”
Jack: “The Ditto is quite petite. It has an insertable length of approximately 3 inches and a circumference of just over 3.5 inches making it, in my opinion the perfect plug for someone who in interested in investigating anal play. While it was too petite for me, it was perfect for Karen. The Ditto is remote controlled and there’s an app for it too. We downloaded the We-Vibe Connect app from our app store. We then turned on the bluetooth function on our phone, pressed the power button on the Ditto, which is found on the base of the toy, and PRESTO. Once the app finds the Ditto it will buzz to life. The app is fantastic because you can see battery levels, choose patterns and speeds and you can even make your own patterns. The Ditto comes preset with 10 modes so, even if you don’t have a smart phone, you can still enjoy the delightful sensation the Ditto offers right out of the box.”

Karen: “Don’t forget about the remote! The remote is the bomb. It’s what makes the Ditto so much fun to use by one’s self or with a partner. It is a small battery powered remote and lets you move back and forth between vibration modes and allows the user to adjust the intensity of the vibrations. Another thing, most butt plugs on the market have a round or anchor shape base, but the Ditto has this unique L-shaped base. I think the L-shape makes the Ditto more comfortable to use and more secure once it’s in place.”
Jack: “I know Karen has already mentioned this, but it bears repeating. If you’re new to anal play, please use a generous amount of lube. Be sure to lube up both your ass and the Ditto before inserting it. And GO slow. So many people try anal play for the first time, do something wrong, like going too fast, or not using enough lube, and they hate the experience. Thus ruling out all future bum fun and pleasure because they weren’t careful. Don’t let that happen to you. I promise you; do things right and you will be in heaven as soon as the vibrations start.”
Karen: “Yep, that’s what happened to me the first time out with the Ditto. After a few sessions of solo play, I was ready to partner up with Jack. Jack wore a much larger plug and I had my Ditto. It was grand. Jack said he could feel vibrations from the Ditto through my vagina. What fun!
Jack: “Because the Ditto is waterproof and made of silicone it’s super easy to clean. Mild soap and warm water does just fine for everyday cleaning. But you can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution to sanitize for sharing. But get this; we wanted to see how well this thing was made so we dropped it into a pot of boiling water for a couple of minutes to actually sterilize it. It stood up that like a pro. Then we ran it trough the dishwasher and that didn’t phase it either. This thing is made to last.”

Karen: “Remember, you can only use a water-based lube with a beautiful silicone toy like this. A silicone-based lube would mar the finish, and you certainly don’t want that.”
Jack: “The Ditto delivers deep, powerful, and rumbly vibrations. They are amazingly strong for such a small toy. I was actually quite surprised.”
Karen: “The sweet little drawstring storage pouch that is included in the package makes the Ditto perfect for travel. I am so stoked about the innovative design, its power, and how quiet it is. It gets my highest recommendation.”

Full Review HERE!

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Hear him moan

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The 5 steamiest sites for audio porn

Not all porn has to be visual.

Who says you have to watch porn, anyway? Audio porn has been booming for years on the internet, boasting faster download speeds, better cost efficiency, and more discreet options than “watching” video pornography. Audio porn even predates PornHub, with everything from phone sex to erotica audiobooks to dirty recordings passed around from lover to lover.

And now professional stars and amateur creators are out there creating porn for your ears. So if you’re looking for some audio porn sites to dive into late at night, here are some of the best on the internet.

The best audio porn sites on the internet

1) Aural Honey

For listeners that like a touch of British charm in their audio porn, Aural Honey is sure to delight.

Run by a self-described “English tea addict with a delightfully dirty mind,” Aural Honey focuses on immersive porn that makes the listener feel like they’re really in the scene. Half of the site is dedicated to relatively tame “Sweet Audio.” These are typically girlfriend roleplays about snuggling, cuddling, or romantic nights together as the rain pours down outside the window. But the other half of the site, “Erotic Audio,” features nearly two dozen audio porn recordings that range from kinky submission to Daddy worship. Highlights include “The Whores of Dracula,” in which two dominant vampire sisters—inspired by Bram Stoker’s Dracula—seduce a helpless man. Then there’s “Drenched for Daddy,” perfect for any listener eager for some age play and body worship.

Aural Honey also hosts a Patreon where interested listeners can pledge monthly payments in exchange for rewards. $5 patrons receive exclusive livestreams and early access to the site’s erotica section, whereas $10 patrons can listen to Patreon-only audio porn and request a three-minute custom recording. You can check out the Patreon page for more rewards and additional patron subscription tiers.

‘Drenched for Daddy,’ an audio porn recording focusing on ageplay by performer Aural Honey.

2) r/GoneWildAudio

If there’s one free audio porn site you should keep in your bookmarks, it’s Reddit’s r/GoneWildAudio. The subreddit lets bedroom performers upload audio recordings of themselves in compromising situations, from masturbating to detailing BDSM bondage scenarios. After being verified by the subreddit’s moderators, users can either upload their own recordings from scratch, or take a preexisting script and record it for the subreddit’s listeners. The best thing about r/GoneWildAudio is that it’s entirely community-oriented, so there’s a wide selection to check out that breaks from traditional porn made for straight men.

r/GoneWildAudio is open to submissions from any Reddit user.

There are two ways to search for content on r/GoneWildAudio. For one, the site uses a tagging system noting performers’ genders. For instance, F4M recordings is audio porn developed by women for men. M4A, meanwhile, features porn by men for listeners of any gender. And then there are more complicated tags for specific interests, like MM4F recordings from two men for a woman, and TF4TF tags by a trans woman for another trans woman.

Users can also type in keywords and look for porn through Reddit’s built-in search feature. For instance, many audio recordings dealing with BDSM are tagged “bondage.” Anal sex, rape play scripts, age play, pet play, and other fetishes feature throughout the site too. To get started, check out “My Daughter Is an Idiot for Breaking Up With You… Let Me Help You Feel Better,” where a sweet and affirming mom hooks up with her daughter’s ex in a slowly building scene. And then there’s “Bathroom Sex with a Stranger,” where a girl seduces another woman from behind and tops her in a bar bathroom.

3) YouTube

Surprisingly enough, YouTube is a great stop for softcore audio porn. While the site largely refuses to host video porn in order to maintain a relatively safe-for-work atmosphere, audio recordings aren’t vigorously bullied off the platform. That means there are plenty of adult performers and mature ASMR artists recording the mildest of mild audio porn for listeners to enjoy.

Take a cruise down YouTube’s ASMR (Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response) section and you’ll find dozens of artists creating audio porn and erotica. Some include intense kissing sessions, like BarbieASMR’s lesbian “Angels Kissing.” And then there are artists like Laila Love, who mixes traditional ASMR play with everything from moaning to roleplaying an ex-girlfriend that kidnaps and binds her lover. These videos are particularly great because they combine audio porn with an accompanying video, acting out sounds and facial expressions to heighten the recording’s immersion.

Then there’s audio porn of the classic variety, posted across the site from various YouTube users. A quick search for “audio porn” or “sexy audio” brings up dozens of videos geared around all sorts of sexual fantasies, from lesbian roleplays to steamy encounters with total strangers. For some of the hottest examples, check out TopSecret Audio, which tackles roleplays ranging from mild dirty talk to full-on erotica. For something sounding a bit more authentic, listen to Down n’ Dirty, a podcast series dedicated entirely to authentic erotica inspired by real life.

BarbieASMR/YouTube

4) Tumblr

It’s an open secret that Tumblr is a great place to find porn. And yes, that includes audio porn. The site is filled with performers sharing their dirty moments and sexual fantasies, from masturbating to having sex. In particular, amateur audio porn is pretty popular on the site, and there’s plenty of sexy real-life sex sessions to go around.

On Audible Porn, Tumblr users can submit their own recordings for the blog, featuring anything from solo masturbation sessions to sex with others. Sex and moans are both common themes on the site, along with plenty of boys and (more often than not) girls touching themselves. Some of the top picks include a girl reaching multiple orgasms from masturbation and “Cute boy moans,” where a boy clearly in heat moans and orgasms. There are also several recordings dedicated to car sex, including one where a couple has particularly loud sex with the radio on.

Then there’s Sounds of Pleasure, another submission-based audio porn blog. Users can submit their own solo masturbation sessions, along with dirty talk, sex, and more. The site has a sizable tagging system for browsing, with audio porn excerpts for everything from lesbian porn to dirty accents to jerk off instruction audio posts. To check out the site’s full offerings, take a look through its archive. Sounds of Pleasure updates regularly, too, making it a top pick for any interested audio porn fan on Tumblr.

5) Audible

Amazon’s Audible is, aptly enough, a hidden gem for audio porn recordings of all kinds. While Amazon doesn’t advertise the site’s erotica audiobook library publicly, some of the best finds on the internet are right on Audible—including erotica that puts Fifty Shades of Grey to shame.

The site features stories that range from lesbian erotica to science-fiction-themed pornography. Particular highlights include Orgasmic: Erotica for Women and Fifty Shades of Lewd Erotica, compilation audio porn recordings that feature short stories for that perfect night in. Audible also hosts audiobook erotica series, meaning listeners can literally grab days’ worth of erotica from their Audible subscription. The six-part series The Marketplace, for instance, features 15 hours worth of BDSM smut in just the first book alone.

Signing up with Audible is pretty easy. There’s a 30-day free trial available when you give Audible a debit or credit card number. Once the free trial is over, users can then purchase a recurring Audible membership between multiple plans. There’s one book per month for $14.95 each month, 2 books for $22.95, 12 books for a yearly $149.50 fee, or 24 books all at once for $229.50 per year. Alongside membership plans, Audible users can also buy more credits to pick up additional books per month, which is a great way to keep on listening to audio porn without changing up a subscription.

Complete Article HERE!

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A Mighty Fine G-Spot Pleasure Tool

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Hey sex fans!

It’s Product Review Friday once again. And this week we have another product from the German company, OVO Lifestyle Toys.

To keep track of all our OVO Lifestyle Toys reviews, here’s what you do. Use the search function in the header of DrDickSexToyReviews.com, type in OVO, and PRESTO!

Today’s product is reviewed by two of the Dr Dick Review Crew veterans, Kevin & Gina.

Ovo E3 G Spot Vibrator —— $39.99

Kevin & Gina
Gina: “Here we go again!”
Kevin: “Today we bring you a very nice g-spot vibe from the German company, Ovo. It has the slightly unremarkable name, E3.”
Gina: “Sounds like a model of BMW. Not particularly sexy. But, I suppose a rose by any other name…”
Kevin: “Right! Call a thing whatever you want, just make sure it does what it’s supposed to.”
Gina: “And the Ovo E3 G Spot Vibrator does deliver.”
Kevin: “Before Gina tells you about the vibe itself I want to comment on the packaging. The E3 come in a very nice gift box. There is an outer sleeve, which features a picture of the E3, and an inner light grey box, with the words Ovo Lifestyle Toys on it. This box holds the black and clear plastic clamshell insert, which holds the vibe in place. The box claps shut with magnets. It’s attractive without being ostentatious. There’s also a USB charger cable and an OVO product catalog and ‘quick start guide’ included.”
Gina: “As stylish as the packaging is, that’s only the beginning. Here are some of the highlights of the E3 itself. Like all g-spot vibes there is an enlarged flat head for optimized g-spot massage. It has a powerful motor. It’s made of seamless, body-safe silicone. It features an illuminated, touch-sensitive dial, which makes adjusting the 5-vibe patterns and 3-power levels very easy. It’s completely waterproof and it rechargeable. It even comes with a 15-year warranty.”
Kevin: “The E3 recharges via a USB connection. There’s a pin that plugs into a port on the bottom of the vibe. You have to really push to get it through the silicone, but once it’s in, it charges quickly. When the vibrator is charging, the light in the middle of the controls flashes. When it is fully charged, the light remains static”
Gina: “You press the middle button on the control panel to turn the E3 on; the button will light up. To start the vibrations you press the up button and then you can scroll up or down through the unique pulsation patterns. But as the controls are right where I grip the vibrator to thrust, it’s very easy to inadvertently change the speed or pattern mid thrust. That’s kind of frustrating. While the flat head is great for g-spot stimulation and can also be used externally for clitoral stimulation.”

Kevin: “As Gina already said, the E3 is covered is covered in a velvety, latex-free, nonporous, phthalate-free, and hypoallergenic silicone. And because it is waterproof it’s a breeze to clean. Submerge it into the sink with mild soap and warm water and scrub it down a bit. Then let it air dry. Or you can just wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution to sanitize it for sharing. And because E3 is also 100% waterproof, it’s the ideal toy for bath or shower.”
Gina: “However, make sure you use only a water-based lubricant with E3.”
Kevin: “I can recommend the E3 for butt play too. There’s just enough flare on the handle or base to make it safe for anal play. So if you don’t have a g-spot, but you do have a p-spot, (prostate) this is a great pleasure product for you.”

Gina: “For some reason there is a huge disparity in the cost of the E3. We looked around the web and saw it for as little as $39 and as expensive as $99. I don’t know why that is, but I encourage you to shop around if you plan to buy.”
Kevin: “Gina and I liked just about everything about E3. It’s a great g-spot toy for newbies as well as veterans, like us. The sleek look, the body-safe materials, it being waterproof and rechargeable makes this product a great addition to any toy collection”

Full Review HERE!

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