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Cushion for the pushin’

Hey sex fans,

Welcome to another installment of Product Review Friday.

Today we feature a product from a new company; at least they’re new to us. Join us in welcoming the good people at Little Deeper to our review effort.

I love bringing you news of small, independent adult product companies. And if they are green and healthful, as is the Little Deeper, than that’s a huge plus in my book.

But don’t take my word for it, lets check in with Dr Dick Review Crew members, Ken & Denise, for their thoughts

Little Deeper —— $89.95

Ken & Denise
Denise: “This is our first posting of the new year and we have a wonderful product to tell you about. The Little Deeper is a practical, easy to use and easy to store cushion that makes partnered sex more fun and less strenuous.”
Ken: “In other words, the Little Deeper is sex furniture. We’ve reviewed a couple of other such products in the past; you can find those reviews HERE!  In fact, Denise and I had the dubious honor of reviewing one of them. And all I can say is, that product was horrible.”
Denise: “Yeah, I remember how frustrated we both were. I even hesitated when Dr Dick invited us to review the Little Deeper. I was afraid that we’d be disappointed again. But I am so glad that Dr Dick persisted, because I am happy to report that the Little Deeper is amazing. We love the fun play on words too.”
Ken: “It just goes to show you that really good things can come from a good company, one who is interested in health and wellbeing, not just cranking out junk for profit.”
Denise: “So you may be asking yourself, what exactly is the Little Deeper. Well, it’s an ergonomically shaped, sturdy foam cushion covered in a removable plush red polyester cover. And it comes in it’s own very smart black zip-up carrying case.”
Ken: “Let me quote from their promotional materials, because I couldn’t express it better. ‘This simple, nifty device lifts and supports a woman’s hips, positioning them in the perfect position for lovemaking. Using the Little Deeper, you can leave behind the toil and effort that can sometimes be associated with enduring sessions of lovemaking, and now perform various positions with more ease and comfort. The cushion is anatomically designed to fit all body types and sizes, and can result in increased pleasure for both partners. As the woman’s hips are tiled at an ideal angle for penetration, a man can plunge into her body more deeply, which means he can simultaneously stimulate her G-spot and give himself limitless access to pleasure. Ultimately, using the Little Deeper cushion can result in more intense, more long-lasting and even more frequent orgasms during vaginal, anal and oral lovemaking.’”
Denise: “What the promotional materials do not tell you is that the handy-dandy Little Deeper works equally well when Ken is on the bottom and I’m pegging the bejesus out of him.”
Ken: “TOTALLY! When Denise straps it on, I know I’m in for the ride of my life. To tell the truth, I think she’s a better top than me.”
Denise: “See how sweet you are, honey? I suppose I understand why all the images on the Little Deeper website show traditional heterosexual coupling. But I think they do themselves a disservice by doing only that. The Little Deeper is for everyone — gay boys and lesbians will love it too. I also think this cushion would be great for older lovers and the bigger-build people among us too.”
Ken: “You’ll never have to struggle with ordinary bed pillows to prop up your partner’s pelvis for a roll in the hay. And the best part is, this simple device leaves your hands free to further pleasure your partner. And it works with a variety of positions.”
Denise: “I want to return to something I said at the very beginning of this review, because it bears repeating. The Little Deeper is easy to store. We’ve seen some of the other sex cushions that are available in stores and online; they’re huge and unwieldy. And unless you have a designated playroom, where in the world would you store something like that? The Little Deeper, in its nondescript carrying case, fits easily and discreetly in our bedroom closet.”
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

Damn-near Perfect

Hey sex fans,

We’re finally back from our all together too brief winter break to bring you the very first installment of our Product Review Friday for 2012. And we have the pleasure of welcoming back some old friends — the good people at WE-Vibe.

I mention this because our first WE-Vibe review was among the very first reviews we ever did, way back in August of 2008. You can find it HERE!

We raved about the WE-Vibe way back then and it also topped our Best Products Of The Year List that year. So let’s just see if this third incarnation of the original is as good as it’s hype.

And for that we check in with Dr Dick Review Crew members, Jack & Karen.

WE VIBE 3 —— $156.99

Jack & Karen
Karen: “Happy New Year everyone! Gosh, it’s so good to be back with the Dr Dick Review Crew. And to think we’re breaking in the new year while having the honor of introducing you to the marvelous WE VIBE 3 to boot. Well it doesn’t get any better than this.”
Jack: “Absolutely! What a way to launch 2012. Karen and I weren’t around when our colleagues, Kevin and Gina, wrote their review of the original WE-Vibe. But we certainly read it when we got involved with this effort. They had such a unique take on the product. If you haven’t read it; you sure oughta.”
Karen: “We intend to match Gina and Kevin’s genius; so here goes. The WE VIBE 3 is a vibration device that is used internally during penetration. That in itself is revolutionary. Picture for a moment the WE VIBE 3 inside a vagina. It is designed to deliver its powerful vibrations to both the G-spot and the clitoris. It is, of course, fully waterproof and come with a slim remote control. It’s brilliant I tell you.”
Jack: “And if you’re the lucky gent who is slipping and sliding in and out of that vagina Karen had you picture in your mind; well then you are also benefiting from the vibration and there’s the girth of the WE VIBE 3 that makes for a tighter fuck. Win, win and win!”
Karen: “But wait there’s more! There are no batteries; the WE VIBE 3 is rechargeable, which makes my heart sing. It comes with its own, covered induction recharge stand; it’s both discreet and very stylish. It’s perfect for travel. The WE VIBE 3 offers three kinds of stimulation, and it’s completely hands-free!”
Jack: “This gets me to my next point. The WE VIBE 3 is not only for penetration sex, no siree. Once I saw the potential of an insertable vibe with a remote control all bets were off. Soon our trips to the supermarket and the Home Depot became adventures in surprise sex. The WE VIBE 3 is super quiet, so Karen could be standing in a check-out lane talking to the casher, me right next to her, when all of a sudden she breaks out into a huge grin and she throws back her head a bit from the pleasure. The casher probably just thinks she on acid. Secretly pleasuring Karen in public, while standing next to her, is a total kick. I tell you, the contact pleasure for me is amazing.”
Karen: “He’s not kidding. I feel like a naughty schoolgirl. This has really spiced up our sex life. It’s so comfortable to wear that I wore the WE VIBE 3 all evening at the New Year’s Eve party we went to. I had the time of my life. Of course, the Champaign didn’t hurt. At one point, Jack gave the remote to a friend of ours. When I saw Jack go outside to chat with friends, I figured I was safe from a sudden burst of pleasure. But my clit jumped to attention when Jack’s friend, who was standing right next to me, jolted me out of my revelry.”
Jack: “The people who make the WE-Vibe have been committed to producing the very best, revolutionary hands-free vibrator for use during sex since it’s first model. But with each new model they outdo themselves. The We-Vibe 2 added variety; they improved the control button and added vibration patterns. Now the WE VIBE 3, features a 40% power increase and a longer battery life (2 hours per charge).”
Karen: “This jewel has two motors connected by a firm yet flexible neck. All this is in a u-shaped lightly textured vibe that fits in the palm of your hand. It is coated in a seamless body-safe, odorless, tasteless silicone. Because it’s waterproof it can be completely sanitized with bleach or in either boiling water or the dishwasher. So clean up is a breeze. And it comes in your choice of three lovely colors.”
Jack: “Because it is made of silicone, you must only use a water-based lube with this beauty. All the WE VIBE 3 packaging, although very attractive, is completely recyclable. Who says being socially conscious has to be dull?”
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

Sex Therapy—What Is It and Who Needs It? – Part 2

(Look for Part 1 of this series HERE!)

Of course, there are plenty of individuals—and couples—who haven’t waited until the last minute to seek help. These people want to be proactive about their concerns. Some people simply need some clear, unambiguous information about human sexuality. A surprising number of people are trying to piece together their sexual lives, but are hampered by misconceptions and misinformation.

Sometimes a momentous event motivates a person to address arising sexual or intimacy issues. The birth of a child, a disease process, a death in the family, or an accident can fundamentally alter the power dynamic of a relationship, which will require a rethinking of the entire relationship.

Or perhaps someone comes to a new realization about him or herself: Perhaps they are finally able to acknowledge their bisexuality, or that he’s gay, or she’s a lesbian. Maybe they are finally able to acknowledge a fetish—he’s a crossdresser, or she’s into another kink. Things like this obviously impact the individual, but if that person is in a relationship, the relationship is also affected. People in these self-revelatory situations are often unsure how to talk about their discoveries with a partner, which is another reason they seek counseling.

Some couples don’t fret when the sex vanishes from the relationship; other couples are devastated. What does one do when one partner still has sexual needs, but the other doesn’t? Often, there are unexplored options that can hold the relationship together, but will address the disparity in sexual interest and desire.

In this case, I can help the couple make compromises without losing their moral compass. Some couples navigate this with ease; others not so much. It can be extremely challenging, but there are ways to preserve what’s sacred about a primary relationship, while contemplating opening the relationship to include others. I can help a couple establish guidelines and ground rules for making the necessary adjustments.

Sometimes the relationship is really wonderful and fun. The couple really loves each other, but they’ve noticed their sex life together is pretty boring and stale. I’m often approached to simply help a couple spice things up. In this instance, my work is sheer joy. Mostly, I just give them permission to experiment and have fun.

You’ve probably noticed that a good portion of the work that I do as a sex therapist is merely giving permission. That may not sound like therapy at all, but when you consider that our sex-negative culture is so full of prohibitions; permission giving is often the front line of sexual rehabilitation. Most of the permissions I give are for an individual to educate him or herself about his or her body and his or her sexual response cycle. Personal exploration, such as masturbation, is the very best means to that education. I’m a huge proponent of partners masturbating together.

Happily, our need to reacquaint and reeducate ourselves about our bodies and our sexual response cycle is a life-long process. There is always something new to explore. As we age, our bodies change, and if we don’t keep up with those changes, we can become frustrated and disoriented. Older people, menopausal women and andropausal men, take longer to build up “a head of sexual steam,” so to speak. If they’re not attuned to the changes they’re going through, they can easily miss the important cues their body is sending to slow down and enjoy the sensuality.

Of course, I could go on and on, but now I want to leave you with what is the distillation of years my thinking about the role sexuality plays in our life:

I believe that sex is like food. We can enjoy it alone, or with others. We can be abstemious, or gluttonous. We can nosh or nibble; dine or devour. And we can be certain there will be both times of feast and famine.

Sex is like food. It can nourish and sustain us, or it can make us sick. We can consume all the available bounty, or restrict our diet. It can completely satisfy, or leave us devastatingly empty. We can employ it to express our highest aspirations, or allow it to rob us of our soul. We can give it as a gift, or use it as a weapon. It can be both bacchanal and sacrament.

One thing is for sure, whether purely physical or transcendentally spiritual, no one can live without food…or sex.

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Touched for the very first time, Part 2

Look for Part 1 of this two part series HERE.

Let’s pick up where we left off last week, on the perils young people face as they navigate the expectations of virginity and sex, and begin to consider their first forays into partnered sex.

Teenagers face enormous peer pressure when it comes to sex, yet there’s precious little education afforded them in terms of the fundamentals of human sexuality. This dearth of clear, unambiguous information on how our bodies work is just the first way we let down our children. There’s almost nothing available to teens to emotionally prepare them for partnered sex.

Mariana is 17. She writes:

I lost my virginity yesterday, but I did not bleed. Why is this?

Hold on there, missy! That’s it? That’s all you’re gonna say about your first time at bat? Is there anyone else out there who is as perplexed by this as I am?

Maybe I’m reading way too much into this. Maybe it is, after all, par for the course. For some young women, the externals of first-time partnered sex are the more important then the act itself. Maybe that’s because less than 5 percent of women have an orgasm the first time they have sex.

It’s clear that we do put more emphasis on the outward signs of virginity, which, in turn trumps everything else?

I guess, Mariana, I would have liked to know if congratulations are order? Was your first time enjoyable? Are you happy it happened? It’s so amazing to me that you didn’t mention any thing about your first intercourse other than that fact that you didn’t bleed. Maybe that’s your way of saying it wasn’t so special.

Sorry about the diversion there, Mariana, as you may know, the hymen is a mucous membrane that is part of the vulva, the external part of a woman’s genitals. It is located outside the vagina, which is the internal part of a woman’s genitals. Not all women have a noticeable hymen. You may or may not have had one to begin with. However, you are right in thinking that most women do. Simply put, having a hymen and/or having it rupture during one’s first coital experience is not necessarily a good indicator of virginity.

Many girls and teens tear or otherwise dilate their hymen while participating in sports like bicycling, horseback riding or gymnastics. This can also happen while inserting tampons, or while masturbating. A girl may not even know she’s done this, since there may be little or no blood or pain involved when it actually happens. The tissues of the vulva are generally very thin and delicate prior to puberty. Again, the presence or absence of a hymen (or its bleeding) in no way indicates whether or not a woman is a virgin.

Some hymens are elastic enough to permit a penis (or similar object) to enter without tearing, or they tear only partially, and there is NO bleeding at all. As I hope you know, when you are adequately aroused, your vagina will lubricate itself and become more flexible. For many women, it will stretch without discomfort. It’s even possible for a woman to have sex for years without “tearing” her hymen.

Tia, age 19, has a very unusual concern.

I have a problem. I’m still a virgin, but my bf thinks I’m not. It’s really my fault he thinks this, cuz I told him I was all experienced and everything. We’ve been going together for about eight months already, and I really want my first time to be with him, but how am I going to act all experienced when I don’t know what I’m doing.
HELP ME PLEASE!!!

That sure enough is a pickle you got yourself into, darlin’. You’ve got some “splainin’ to do, Lucy!”

Curiously enough, I’m more likely to hear from young women who are not virgins, but want to know how they can fool a new partner into thinking they are. I guess we can chalk up all this deception and confusion to the powerful associations every culture imposes on technical virginity.

And like most things sexual, there is a huge double standard between the cultural and personal implications of virginity for men and women. The cultural expectations regarding virginity are also tied to age as well as gender. For example, our society expects its 16-year-old girls to be virgins. To be otherwise at that tender age would be a scandal in most communities. But a 35-year-old woman who is still a virgin is considered an old maid—or worse, a (gasp) lesbian.

Of course, things are a bit more fluid when it comes to boys. On one hand, a 16-year-old boy who is not a virgin may raise eyebrows in some communities. But many others in those same communities would praise him for being a “stud.” On the other hand, a 35-year-old man who is still a virgin is not only the butt of jokes—or worse, a “queer”—but he’s also more of a disgrace to his gender than an old maid is to hers. Funny how that works, huh?

I hasten to add that there is a lot to argue with in terms of these arbitrary cultural norms, and I encourage ya’ll to argue away. God knows I do! And just because they’re there, and considered “norms” where you are, that doesn’t mean you have to buy into them. God knows I don’t! So make up your own mind.

But back to you, Tia. I’d love to know why you felt the need to deceive your boyfriend in the first place. Do the people you hang with prize sexual experience over sexual innocence for a woman of 19? And what are the expectations of your peer group regarding a 19-year-old guy? I’ll bet the expectation is that he be sexually experienced—right?

Well, you can see why a lot of people—and not just you—find this whole thing just too damned complicated. And rather than adding to the confusion or the deception, I encourage you to come clean with your boyfriend about the status, as it were, of your cherry.

Here’s why I think this is the best policy. First, if the boyfriend is sexually experienced, it will be very difficult for you to hide the fact that you are not. Besides, like you said in your message to me: “I really want my first time to be with him.” Tell him that! No man is gonna turn that down…ever. In fact, that may be the most sexually charged and treasured sentence in any language.

Begin the big talk with your boyfriend like this: “Baby, I got something real special to tell you. You know how I’ve been saying that I’ve been with other guys and everything? Well that was just my way of keeping all the other guys from pestering me for my junk. Baby, the truth is I haven’t had sex before now. And the best part of this is I’ve decided that I really want my first time to be with you. My cherry belongs to you, baby”

Clearing the air like this will also allow you to relax when the moment finally happens. And relaxation is the key to enjoying yourself. And you should enjoy yourself, because no one can do that for you.

Good luck!

Sailing the ocean blu

Hey sex fans!

We haven’t had a Product Review Friday in a while, so let’s have one today! And today we bring you a review of another product that comes to us from our favorite retailer — Adult Sex Toys .com.

Here’s the husband and wife team, Dr Dick Review Crew members, Jack & Karen.

Ocean Blu Bathing Gel by Kama Sutra —— $12.50

Jack & Karen
Karen: “We both love bath products like Kama Sutra’s Ocean Blu Bathing Gel. We have this beautiful, huge tub in our master bathroom and we often both luxuriate in it together. I’m telling you, there is nothing more suited to alleviating oneself of the stresses of the day than a blissful soak together.”
Jack: “She’s right. We actually plan bath night. It’s healthful, intimate and soothing. Sometimes it’s a prelude to some hot monkey love, but just as often it is just a time to be close, talk and enjoy one another’s company.”
Karen: “We have a bath budget too. Both of us contribute to our bath fund, although I generally do the shopping. We spend on gels and lotions, sponges, loofas and the like and sometimes we splurge on waterproof toys.”
Jack: “Generally this arrangement works out, but Karen is famous for buying bath products that are too sweet smelling. I really prefer more natural scents or fragrances. That’s why I love Ocean Blu Bathing Gel. It is among my favorites.”
Karen: “Guilty as charged! I don’t know, sometimes I just get carried away in a bath shoppe; I’m drawn to the more floral scents. But I know Jack doesn’t care for them. I save them for my private time. But for our time together, I must agree Ocean Blu Bathing Gel is great.”
Jack: “This is what is printed on the pump bottle: ‘…turns a bath or shower into a seaside escape, blending skin protecting vegetable oils and conditioning Vitamin E to create a frothy, cleansing lather as fragrant and invigorating as an ocean breeze.’ I don’t talk like that, but it is pretty accurate. If I had to translate that, I’d just say it was a manly scent that it is very good for your skin.”
Karen: “Ocean Blu Bathing Gel is dermatologist tested, cruelty-free (not tested on animals) hypoallergenic and made in the USA. In fact, the Kama Sutra company has been around since 1969. They must be doing something right.”
Jack: “The convenient pump bottle makes this gel perfect at the sink for washing hands or in the shower.”
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

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