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A June Is Bustin’ Out All Over Q&A Show — Podcast #283 — 06/06/11


Hey sex fans, welcome back!

Yes siree, June is busting out all over! It’s pert’near summer and I just realized that we haven’t had a Q&A show since early last month. So ya know what else is bustin out all over? My voicemail and email in boxes, that’s what! I have a big hot load of questions from the sexually worrisome out there. And I’m all ready to dish out some snappy answers to dazzle and delight today’s correspondents, as well as everyone else in my audience.

  • Jackie hates it when her partner busts a nut ON her.
  • Ron is hoping I know where he can find some stray dick to suck.
  • LSSC has a husband who thinks sex is dirty.
  • Shades wants vibrating panties for men.
  • Michael thinks his wife is a mess, but actually it’s HIM.
  • RAHUL wants to know if women like sex as much as men.
  • Luke and his GF fuck like bunnies and now she’s sore.
  • Micah can’t keep it up and he’s too young for ED.
  • Conal has a porn jones and needs help.
  • Harrison wants to know how to clean his hole on a budget.
  • Wasim thinks his nuts are too small and soft.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Dr Dick’s Sex Advice and Dr Dick’s Sex Toy Review.

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously, or just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode

Splish-Splash

I don’t know what to attribute this too, but in the last three weeks I’ve received no less than six anonymous messages from people asking about watersports. Some are into it; some are horrified. One person was looking for a way to entice his partner into piss play. Here’s an example of the kind of messages I’m receiving.

Name: Paul
Gender: male
Age: 32
Location: Seattle
I hope this isn’t the first time you’ve gotten this kind of question but I’ve recently discovered that I have a urine fetish. And I guess what I want to know is if among gay men I am in a minority or what? Do you know of other guys out there who share my fetish? Also I’m in a relationship and I don’t think my boyfriend shares my interests so I was wondering if you might have some ideas on how to break the news to him. Thanks a lot.

A urine fetish, huh? Ok! Are you talking about what those in the know call watersports or golden showers? I think you’re telling me you like to play with your pee, or the pee of other folks, right?

Oh my god, this is like a totally popular fetish, and not just common among the gays, don’t cha know. I’m surprised that you haven’t encountered it in loads other people before now. Folks of every sexual stripe and persuasion are known to enjoy piss play. There’s even a scientific name for it: urophilia. Doesn’t that sound fun? Honey, guess what? I’m a urophiliac and you can be one too!

Hell, this is such a popular fetish that it has a full subset of associated fetishes. There are clothes wetting, bed-wetting and diaper fetishes, urinal fetishes and for the BDSM crowd there are humiliation scenes and bladder control scenes just to name a few.

Historically speaking, people have been drinking their own urine as an alternative medicine for as long as…well, as long as there’s been pee to drink. Bathing in urine is also very common in some cultures.

Curiously enough, watersports is not necessarily always a sexual fetish, although it can be sexual in nature. Activities where piss is taken internally (swallowed or received anally or vaginally) can be risky. The pee-ee will no doubt ingest any and all un-metabolized drugs — pharmaceutical as well as recreational — which were consumed by the pee-er. In some societies and in some situations, this is the actual intent — for example intensifying and prolonging the effects of a hallucinogenic drug.

Prospective pee drinkers should be aware that there are a few drugs that pass through the body either partly unchanged or entirely unchanged, like those nasty amphetamines and their derivatives. So it’s all together possible to get really high from drinking a druggie’s piss.

Finally, how do you come out as a pee-queen to your boyfriend? I’m of the mind that the direct approach works best. There’s less room for misunderstandings. You could come right out and ask him for what you want. Darling, meet me in the bathroom. I want to show you something really festive and entertaining. I mean, what homo’s not gonna fall for that?

A less assertive way would be to visit several golden shower oriented websites, they abound on the internet, ya know. Leave the page open for the BF to find. That will surely stir things up. And unless he’s as dense as a post, he’ll begin to get the message. You could also “accidentally” download a watersports video. That would, no doubt, open the desired discussion. “Holy cow honey, look what I got up by mistake. You wanna watch it? Isn’t this hot? Oh my god, I think I just wet my pants. Wanna see?”

Good luck.

Tease For Two

Hey sex fans,

It’s Product Review Friday and we have something truly unique for you today and it comes to us directly from the manufacturer, Wet For Her. This is a brand new company that features designs by Parisian lesbians. Can ya stand it?

For more on this, here’s Dr Dick Review Crew members Gina & Kevin.

Wet For Her Two —— $39.00

Gina & Kevin
Gina: “When we swung by Dr Dick pad to pick up our latest product for review, Kevin and I had such a laugh. When we were handed the Wet For Her Two, we though it was one of those gag novelty items you often see in adult stores.”
Kevin: “Absolutely! But upon closer inspection we discovered that Wet For Her Two is not a novelty in a joke sort of way, but a pleasure object that is designed in a novel way.”
Gina: “We probably should have known that our first impression was wrong because the Wet For Her Two packaging is simple but very smart-looking. There is no garish sexual depictions like one would expect to see on a novelty item. There is, however, a totally hot image of a bare-breasted woman holding two fingers over her nipple on the back panel of the box.”
Kevin: “I’ll say; it’s sizzlin’ alright! And the two finger placement over her nipple, besides being discreet, hints at what the Wet For Her Two is.”
Gina: “The Wet For Her Two is a very creative insertable that slips over your forefinger and middle finger an acts as an extension for your fingers so that you can manual penetrate yourself or your partner with ease. The first 3 inches or so of the toy are hollow, the last 2 inches solid. So you get how it works, right? It’s beautifully low-tech.”
Kevin: “When Gina says; “manually penetrate,” what she actually means is finger-fucking. That’s why the concept of finger extensions is such a novel, and I might add brilliant, idea. It makes finger-fucking effortless because the Wet For Her Two extends your reach. I’d never be able to finger Gina’s G-spot using my god-given fingers; they’re just too short. Kudos to the lesbian identified chicks who came up with this idea.”
Gina: “Yeah, leave it to lesbians to know their way around a pussy as well as know how to pleasure one. The Wet For Her Two is made of 100% body-safe silicone. It’s soft and pliable enough to feel your own internal temperature as well as your orgasmic contractions when they cum. That being said, I have to admit that I much preferred Kevin using the Wet For Her Two on me than me using it on myself. When I used it on myself, the palm of my hand covered my clit so that I could only use the heal of my hand to rub myself there.”
Kevin: “Believe me, I was happy to oblige Gina. Her G-spot orgasms are beautiful to behold. And up until this point, I’d been only able to make her cum with a dildo type insertable. Now that I have these finger extensions, I’m like doing it myself, without the help of a foreign object. There is one thing I need to mention though. Clearly the Wet For Her Two is designed for thinner, feminine fingers. It was a struggle to slip this thing over my fat, manly fingers. I wound up dabbing a bit of water-based lube on my fingers and inside the Wet For Her Two for easier insertion. That did the trick.”
Gina: “The Wet For Her Two is made to be shared. Because it’s silicone, it’s nonporous, phthalates-free, hypoallergenic, latex-free and waterproof. Mild soap and warm water does just fine for everyday cleaning. You can also sanitize it with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution. Drop it in a pot of boiling water or run it through the dishwasher; it’s all good!”
Kevin: “Speaking of sharing; I decided to take the Wet For Her Two for a spin up my ass. Anyone who follows our reviews knows I have penchant for repurposing any and all G-spot toys into P-spot toys. And I am happy to report that this baby worked like a charm. Guys, why struggle to massage your prostate with just your fingers when you can do so more easily and without the wrist strain with the Wet For Her Two.”
Gina: “But, just like me, Kevin preferred that I use the Wet For Her Two on him instead of him poking himself in the ass with it.”
Kevin: “It’s true! I’m perfectly able to diddle myself, but I love it when Gina takes over. Once she gets me warmed up with the Wet For Her Two, I’m all ready for her to peg me senseless with one of her strap-on dildos. YUMMY!”
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY!

What’s up with me, Doc?

Can we talk about sexual orientation for a bit? I sure hope so, because I’m gonna go ahead and launch into it here, if you’re ready or not.

Among the load of email I get from the sexually worrisome in any given week, I will predictably get a handful of questions, mostly from guys, who are concerned that they might get gay.

The guys writing in are concerned enough by something that is going on inside of them that they’re compelled to broach the issue with me. I hasten to add that rarely are these communications the “Gee, I’m Mildly Curious” type. Rather they’re more likely to be the “Oh My God, What Wrong With Me?” type. They fear that they picked up queer cooties somewhere and their undies are all in a twist fearing they are scared for life. Ya know, kinda like the pox.

Then there are those who write in wanting to me to make sense of their sexual ramblings. They’ve been playing on both sides of the fence, so to speak; and they want me make the call. My response to each group of correspondents is virtually the same — for most of us sexual interests and behaviors are way more fluid than we care to acknowledge. For example, here’s young (20-year-old) Mel.

My first sex was with a guy, and then I got plenty of sex with girls. Then there was the time that I got fucked, it hurts on the first time but as it continued it started to feel tickly and I started to enjoy it. But I still like to have sex with girls. What do you think I am really?

What do I think you are, REALLY? Why would you want me, a total stranger, to offer an opinion on who you REALLY are? I mean, REALLY!

I gather you want me to weigh in on your sexual orientation, right? Well from the bit of information you give me, I’d say you’re able to swing both ways. And that’s a good thing, at least in terms of getting a date. You have it way over all the other folks who acknowledge being interested in only one gender.

Listen, all human sexuality is on a continuum. Have you ever heard of the Kinsey 0-6 scale? The dean of American sex research, Alfred Kinsey, his associate, Wardell Pomeroy, and their colleagues developed this scale as a way of classifying a person’s sexuality in terms of both behavior and fantasy.

This is what they developed.

0 represents an exclusive heterosexual person, who has no homosexual behavior or fantasy.
1 represents a predominantly heterosexual person, who may have incidental same sex feelings — most likely in fantasy only.
2 represents a predominantly heterosexual person, who has more than incidental same sex feelings and experience — fantasy for sure and probably behavior too.
3 represents an equally heterosexual and homosexual person, one who enjoys both other and same sex behavior and fantasy.
4 represents a predominantly homosexual person, who has more than incidental other sex feelings and experience — fantasy for sure and probably behavior too.
5 represents a predominantly homosexual person, who may have incidental same other sex feelings — most likely in fantasy only.
6 represents an exclusively homosexual person, who has no heterosexual behavior or fantasy.

These pioneering sexologists also discovered that an individual can, and often does move around on this scale at different periods in his/her life. So if you really want to know what you really are, look to both your fantasy life and your actual behaviors and make your call with that information. Just don’t be overly surprised if you find that you shift from one position to another as you grow into you sexuality.

Good luck!

To elaborate on what I just said to our young friend, Mel, I’m going to go all egghead on you. Because there is a body of sexual research that underscores just how complex this whole issue is.

For example, did you know that a recent study discovered that gay men and straight women have similar brain organization? It’s true!

Researchers in Sweden found that gay men and straight women share some characteristics in the area of the brain responsible for emotion, mood and anxiety. Brain scans also showed the same symmetry among lesbians and straight men. These findings were published in the prestigious journal — The Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

The researchers quickly added that their study couldn’t determine whether the differences in brain organization were inherited or due to exposure to hormones, such as testosterone, in the womb. They were also unable to conclude if brain organization is responsible for sexual orientation.

Numerous other studies have examined the roles genetics, biology and environment play in sexual orientation. But little evidence exists that any one factor in particular plays the all-important primary role. This leads most scientists to assert that both nature and nurture play a part.

To make matters worse, some research contradicts other research, and some promising findings never pan out. (Did you know that there was once a belief that male homosexuality and finger length might be linked? Another, later discredited claim, suggested that gays have distinctive fingerprint ridge patterns.) And researchers never agree on how to interpret results even when they find a likely correlation.

Here are some fun facts you might find interesting.

• A study of 87,000 British men published in 2007 found that gay men have more older brothers than straight men do. Only big brothers count. And lesbians don’t show such patterns.

Ray Blanchard of the University of Toronto, an expert on the “big-brother effect” says that each older brother will increase a man’s chances of being gay by 33%. That’s not as dramatic as it might sound. A man’s chance of being gay is pretty low to begin with — perhaps as low as 2%. So having one older brother only ups the chance of being gay to only about 2.6%.

Curiously enough, this “big-brother effect” holds true even for gay men who weren’t raised with their older brothers. This leads researchers to believe the key to understanding this is in the mother’s womb. After giving birth to a boy, a woman’s immune system can create antibodies to foreign, male proteins in her bloodstream. Subsequent sons in the womb could be exposed to these “anti-boy” antibodies, which might affect sexual development in the brain. How freakin’ amazing is that?

• The hand you use to sign your name might have something to do with what gender you are drawn to.

An study containing more than 23,000 men and women from North America and Europe in the year 2000 found that being non-right-handed seems to increase a man’s chances of being gay by about 34%, and a woman’s by about 90%.

Again researchers guess that different-than-normal levels of testosterone in the womb — widely theorized to play a role in determining eventual sexual orientation — could nudge a fetus toward brain organization that favors left-handedness as well as same-sex attraction.

• If exposure to testosterone in the womb influences sexual orientation, scientists reckon that straight and gay people would differ in body parts strongly affected by testosterone, such as a guy’s cock.

Here we get back to Alfred Kinsey’s groundbreaking work. Researchers at Brock University in Ontario reviewed the data on 5,000 gay and straight men collected by Kinsey and his associates from the 1930s to the 1960s. Their results, published in 1999, showed that gay men had longer, thicker penises than did straight men. On average, about 6.5 inches long and 4.95 inches around when erect, versus 6.1 inches long and 4.8 inches around for straight men.

Again, no one can actually say for certain what this means. One guess is that some male fetuses are exposed to a unique mix of hormones in the womb. Testosterone levels might spike early, causing enhanced penis growth, then drop off later in pregnancy — leading to some feminine characteristics.

As you can see, there’s a still a lot of work to be done in this field. The next frontier looks to be in the subtle differences in how gay and straight brains navigate new cities, respond to erotic movies and react to the scent of sweat and urine.

Stay tuned!

The Erotic Mind of Lucy Felthouse — Podcast #273 — 04/11/11

Hey sex fans, welcome back!

We’re back with more of The Erotic Mind series, but today we return to our roots, the world of words. After several weeks of chats with noted erotic visual artists we resume our conversation with an erotic literary artist of note. Today we travel to a county in the East Midlands of England, Derbyshire to be exact, to check in with the marvelous up and coming author, Lucy Felthouse.

Lucy and I discuss:

  • A list of her publications;
  • Being her own publisher;
  • The inspiration of the Peak District in the UK;
  • The evolution of the role of women in erotica;
  • Her erotica clearinghouse site, Eroticaforall.co.uk;
  • Writing under her real name;
  • When the erotic element began to appear in her work;
  • Advice for the novice erotica writer;
  • The challenge of choosing just the right genital euphemism.

Lucy is quite the outdoorswoman and so when I prevail upon her to share a selection of the fruit of her Erotic Mind, she graciously agrees to read a delectable morsel from her short story, Fun In The Forest.

For more of Lucy, be sure to visit her on her site HERE! She also invites you to check out the erotica supersite she founded HERE! And look for her on Facebook HERE and Twitter HERE!

(click on the thumbnails below to get more information about these volumes)


BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for all my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s Podcast is bought to you by: DR DICK’S — HOW TO VIDEO LIBRARY.

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