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Finger Food

We’re back with Part 2 of Jada’s show and tell of the Emotional Bliss massagers from the UK.

Did you some how miss last week’s presentation?  Not to worry!  Look for it HERE!

Chandra $49.95

Jada

This little lovely is the Chandra by Emotional Bliss.   Where last week’s offering, Femblossom, was a powerful, multi-speed handful; Chandra is a cute, discreet, single-speed vibe that you wear on your finger.  It’s so adorable and petite; at first I thought it was some kind of novelty item.  I soon discovered that the Chandra is decidedly not that.  This is a fully functional personal massager that has been shrunk down to the size of your thumb (2.75 X .75 in).  It is designed to direct stimulation directly to those yummy places on your body, like nipples, clit and labia.Chandra-Emotional-Bliss-558733---Emotional-Bliss-558733-MEDIUM_IMAGE

When I masturbate, I use my fingers; as I assume most women do.  I’m not one for vaginal insertions when I pleasure myself.  But rather I concentrate on my clitoris.  The Chandra is absolutely perfect for this purpose.  You simply attach the massager to one of the three finger clips (each clip is a different size), and that’s it.  Since it’s rechargeable, there are no cords to fuss with.  I absolutely love it.

I can direct as much stimulation I like to the precise area I want.  The Chandra certainly can be used in conjunction with a dildo if that’s what you’re into, but it’s perfect on its own.

My husband loves the Chandra, not only what it does for me but what it does for him.  To be perfectly frank, I’m only orgasmic with clitoral stimulation.  So even in intercourse, I must stimulate myself.  Sometimes this can get tiring.  Introducing a regular sized vibe can be intrusive to the intimate moment.  But there’s nothing invasive with the Chandra.  You see, wherever my finger goes, so goes my Chandra.  I can easily move from my clit to my nipples, to my husband’s nipples and then to his scrotum, then back to my clit.  My orgasms are amazingly strong, yet effortless.  It’s like I now have a bionic finger.

Chandra

The Chandra is surprisingly quiet for as powerful as it is.  You can immediately tell this is a quality vibe.  Like it’s big sister, the Femblossom, the Chandra is made of non-porous medical grade TPE plastic.  It also has the same antibacterial agent incorporated in it during the manufacturing process.

The Chandra come with:

  • 3 Finger Clips
  • AC Adapter
  • Water-based lube sample
  • Silicone-based lube sample
  • Instruction Booklet


Full Review HERE!

If that don’t beat all!

Hey sex fans!

A new edition of Product Review Friday is on tap for today. This week we feature a third product from the creative minds at Zini. A couple of weeks ago we reviewed a couple of male-oriented toys from their extensive line. Today it’s a unisex vibe that is being marketed to couples.

Here are Dr Dick Review Crew members, Jack & Karen, to show and tell.

Zini Donut —— $145.99

Jack & Karen
Karen: “There’s no getting around it, the Zini Donut is a winner!”Zini Donut
Jack: “Nothin’ like spilling the beans right out the gate, huh Karen? I thought we were gonna build up the suspense a bit first. You know, tease our audience with some of the particulars before we pass judgment.”
Karen: “Yeah, I know. Sorry! It’s just that I’m so jazzed about this product. I simply couldn’t help myself. Just look at it; it’s so adorable. I’ve never seen anything like it. It’s fun, it’s functional, and it resembles one of my favorite foods.”
Jack: “So now that you know we absolutely love the Zini Donut, maybe we better double back and tell you what it is and why we like it so much. I’ll bet that you can tell by the name that the Zini Donut is shaped like a doughnut or bagel if you prefer. It’s about the same size too. It’s very unassuming when you see it sitting in its box, in fact you’d never guess at its versatility by just looking at it.”
Karen: “That’s why I was so wowed by the Zini Donut. Opening the stylish gift box, which by the way, makes for a beautiful presentation, the Zini Donut sits in its plastic shell. I went, ‘OK, that’s nice, I suppose, but what the heck is it?’”donut_02-1
Jack: “We knew we were in for a treat at first touch. The Zini Donut has a skin of silky silicone. And as you know, silicone is latex-free, nonporous, phthalate-free, and hypoallergenic. It’s our favorite sex toy material. Once out of the box we began to realize its potential. The Zini Donut is actually an amazing C-shaped vibe and both ends of the thing vibrate with independent motors, but they vibrate in unison. The shape has a bit of give to it so that I can easily fit it around my cock, for example. I can position it around the base of my dick, like a cockring, or at the head of my dick to stimulate my frenulum. I can even use it like a stroker. But, just out of the package, the ends of the vibe are fit snugly into a matching cuff, thus making the doughnut shape. What a brilliantly innovative concept!”
Karen: “And I can use the Zini Donut internally, which provides hands-free intense simultaneous stimulation to both my G-spot and my clit. Just be aware that, despite its flexibility, it immediately resumes its C shape. This creates a clamping sensation that may be too much for some women, but I love it. At the same time, the clamping action is ideal for use on either side of my clit and/or nipples. It can just as easily be used anally, providing P-spot and perineum stimulation simultaneously. The truth is that the Zini Donut can be use anywhere on the body to stimulate your naughty parts or soothe away muscle tension or a headache.”
Jack: “I know that there are still a lot of guys out there who resist the idea of vibrator use during partnered sex. And most of you guys resist because you have an outmoded notion about what vibrators look like. I know because I used to be one of those guys. I didn’t want Karen using a phallic shaped vibe to pleasure herself while we were having sex together. But then I was introduced to the vast array of couple oriented vibrators that don’t look like a cock, and I was sold. The Zini Donut is one such vibrator.”donut_03
Karen: “Jack already mentioned the dual motor. Their harmonized system of vibration offers 4 intensity levels and 15 distinct pulse patterns. The 3-button control panel is very easy to operate although it does take some finger pressure. There’s a (+) button that turns on the vibration and escalates the intensity, and a (–) button that deescalates the vibration intensity and turns it off. The (0) button, between the other two buttons, cycles through the pulse patterns. And this thing is super quiet; I mean, really, really quiet. It provides more of a buzzing sensation than a rumbling sensation, if that means anything to you.”
Jack: “The Zini Donut is both completely waterproof and rechargeable. It’s perfect for bath and shower use. There’s a tiny dimple near the top of the vibe, which serves as the recharge port. You insert the recharging USB cable there. When you withdraw the cable, after the charge, the dimple closes and creates a watertight seal. This is one of my favorite ways of recharging a toy. I like it better than a recharging stand that other high-end vibes are offering these days.”
Karen: “Because the Zini Donut is waterproof and made of silicone it’s super easy to clean. Mild soap and warm water does just fine for everyday cleaning. But you can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution to sanitize for sharing. But get this; we wanted to see how well this thing was made so we dropped it into a pot of boiling water for a couple of minutes to actually sterilize it. It stood up that like a pro. Then we ran it trough the dishwasher and that didn’t phase it either. This thing is made to last.”
Jack: “Remember, you can only use a water-based lube with a beautiful silicone toy like this. A silicone-based lube would mar the finish, and you certainly don’t want that.”
Karen: “Besides the beautiful gift box there is a sweet little drawstring storage pouch that is perfect for travel. For those of you who might be thinking that the price tag is a bit steep, let me remind you that you are paying for quality—design, engineering, and materials. And you’ll never have to buy batteries. The Zini Donut is, as I already said, gonna last. I am so stoked about the innovative design, its power, and how quiet it is. It gets my highest recommendation.”
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY!

Nothing beats threes

David
My wife and I have wanted to add a third person to our relationship. Would you have any advice for us on how we could do this? Is this something that you could assist us with? We are in our mid forties and wanting to do this with someone we can trust.
Please help.

Hey David, try using the search feature in the header. Type in 3-way and/or swinger. You’ll find a wealth of information (both written and audio) on the topic you raise.

Here’s a taste of what you will find:3way-78516707835_xlarge

Trying new things can be really fun especially when your playing with people you like and are turned on by. I’d suggest you keep the event light and breezy. Too many people try to script a 3-way to within an inch of its life, and that can ruin the whole damn thing. At the same time, just hooking up for quick shag can be a little too impersonal.

There is another way. I suggest that you, your wife and the potential partner start your encounter by getting a bite to eat together. A little food and a couple cocktails can be a great start to the adventure. No doubt all three of you will be a little nervous, so make this part of the outing sexy and flirtatious. Each of you could practice your seduction skills on each other. In doing so, you will soon discover the sexual hierarchy…and there always is one in these kinds of encounters. If there are any ground rules for the encounter, this is the time to mention them. You and your wife should have discussed this ahead of time. The more you discover about your potential partner in this non-sexual, but seductive environment the more prepared ya’ll will be for how the rest of the evening will play itself out.

If it were I, I’d want to get a sense of how experienced the other person is at having a 3-way. Other important questions; are either you or your wife bisexual? Is the person you are inviting to join you bisexual? If the answer to either of these questions is yes, you can be assured that the dynamic of the 3-way will be fundamentally different than if none or only one of you is bi.

Be sure to inquire about the sexual fantasies of your prospective partner and share some of your own. In most situations, all the partners in a ménage are equal. Make sure that your potential play partner knows what turns each of you on. You’d be wise to know in advance what turns him/her on as well. That will make the event go a whole lot smoother.

There are some fine videos in my How To Video Library on the topic. Look for the Video Library tab in the header, then search for 3-way or swinger.

Here’s another tip: I’ve done several podcasts with seasoned swingers. All these conversations are part of the Sex EDGE-U-cation show, don’t cha know. This series of interviews takes a look at the world of fetish sex, kink and alternative lifestyles. We touch on topics both familiar and exotic. And I chat with prominent educators, practitioners and advocates of unconventional sexual expressions and lifestyles from all over the world. Here’s a fine example: The founder of Life On The Swingset, Cooper Beckett and his ever so lovely podcast co-host, Ginger. All these conversations about consensual non-monogamy are fun and informative. Don’t miss miss them!

Good luck

You are what you eat

Name: Edie
Gender: female
Age: 52
Location: Galveston
Are there any foods I can add to my diet that might boost my sex drive? Some of which seems to have been lost in my advancing years. Any information would certainly be appreciated.

People first sought aphrodisiacs as a remedy for various sexual difficulties, especially performance anxiety. Aphrodisiacs are also thought to boost both male and female potency. In ancient times nutrition was always an issue. Food hasn’t always been as available as it is today. And of course, nothing pulls the plug on the libido like malnutrition. And hunger radically reduces fertility rates.

Our forbearers believed that anything in nature that looked like or represented fertility, such as bulbs, eggs, snails were considered to have sexual powers. Other types of foods were considered stimulating because they physically resembled male or female genitalia.

The Greeks and Romans believed aniseed had special powers. Sucking on the seeds is said to increases your desire. Or maybe it just freshened the breath enough to get close enough to fuck.

Almonds have been a symbol of fertility throughout the ages. The aroma is thought to induce passion in a female. Arugula or “rocket” has been considered an aphrodisiac since the first century A.D. Arugula was added to grated orchid bulbs and parsnips, which was combined with pine nuts and pistachios for a full-on erotic feast.

The Aztecs called the avocado tree the “testicle tree” for obvious reasons. The fruit hanging in pairs, as it does, resembles a man’s cajones.

Bananas have a marvelous phallic shape. But from a more practical standpoint bananas are rich in potassium and B vitamins, necessities for sex hormone production.

Chocolate is known as the “nourishment of the Gods”. Chocolate contains chemicals thought to effect neurotransmitters in the brain. It also contains more antioxidants than does red wine.

Carrots are believed to be a stimulant to the male. The phallic shape has long been associated with stimulation since ancient times. Early Middle Eastern potentates used carrots to aid in their seductions.

The Arabian nights tells a tale of a merchant who had been childless for 40 years but was cured by a concoction that included coriander. Cilantro is also known as an “appetite” stimulant.

Fennel, like anise, was found to be a source of natural plant estrogens. Use of fennel as an aphrodisiac dates back to the ancient Egyptians.

An open fig looks like a vagina. And traditionally it is thought of as sexual stimulant. A man breaking open a fig and eating it in front of his lover is a powerful erotic act.

The ‘heat’ in garlic is said to stir sexual desires. Garlic has been used for centuries to cure everything from the common cold to heart ailments.

Ginger root raw, cooked, pickled or crystallized is a powerful stimulant to the circulatory system. And what is good sex if it isn’t all about healthy blood flow?

The Egyptian believed that honey was a cure for sterility and impotence. Medieval seducers plied their partners with Mead, a fermented drink made from honey. Lovers on their “Honeymoon” drank mead and it was thought to “sweeten” the marriage.

Mustard, maybe because of its bite, is believed to stimulate the sex glands and increase desire.

Chinese women prize nutmeg as an aphrodisiac. In quantity nutmeg can have a hallucinogenic effect.

Oysters are legendary aphrodisiacs. They of course resemble a pussy, but they are also very nutritious and high in protein.

Tomatoes, known as the “love apple” are considered love food, because they have great nutritional value and their acidity is considered a sex stimulant.

The scent and flavor of vanilla is believed to increase lust.

Good luck

Sex Therapy—What Is It and Who Needs It? – Part 2

(Look for Part 1 of this series HERE!)

Of course, there are plenty of individuals—and couples—who haven’t waited until the last minute to seek help. These people want to be proactive about their concerns. Some people simply need some clear, unambiguous information about human sexuality. A surprising number of people are trying to piece together their sexual lives, but are hampered by misconceptions and misinformation.

Sometimes a momentous event motivates a person to address arising sexual or intimacy issues. The birth of a child, a disease process, a death in the family, or an accident can fundamentally alter the power dynamic of a relationship, which will require a rethinking of the entire relationship.

Or perhaps someone comes to a new realization about him or herself: Perhaps they are finally able to acknowledge their bisexuality, or that he’s gay, or she’s a lesbian. Maybe they are finally able to acknowledge a fetish—he’s a crossdresser, or she’s into another kink. Things like this obviously impact the individual, but if that person is in a relationship, the relationship is also affected. People in these self-revelatory situations are often unsure how to talk about their discoveries with a partner, which is another reason they seek counseling.

Some couples don’t fret when the sex vanishes from the relationship; other couples are devastated. What does one do when one partner still has sexual needs, but the other doesn’t? Often, there are unexplored options that can hold the relationship together, but will address the disparity in sexual interest and desire.

In this case, I can help the couple make compromises without losing their moral compass. Some couples navigate this with ease; others not so much. It can be extremely challenging, but there are ways to preserve what’s sacred about a primary relationship, while contemplating opening the relationship to include others. I can help a couple establish guidelines and ground rules for making the necessary adjustments.

Sometimes the relationship is really wonderful and fun. The couple really loves each other, but they’ve noticed their sex life together is pretty boring and stale. I’m often approached to simply help a couple spice things up. In this instance, my work is sheer joy. Mostly, I just give them permission to experiment and have fun.

You’ve probably noticed that a good portion of the work that I do as a sex therapist is merely giving permission. That may not sound like therapy at all, but when you consider that our sex-negative culture is so full of prohibitions; permission giving is often the front line of sexual rehabilitation. Most of the permissions I give are for an individual to educate him or herself about his or her body and his or her sexual response cycle. Personal exploration, such as masturbation, is the very best means to that education. I’m a huge proponent of partners masturbating together.

Happily, our need to reacquaint and reeducate ourselves about our bodies and our sexual response cycle is a life-long process. There is always something new to explore. As we age, our bodies change, and if we don’t keep up with those changes, we can become frustrated and disoriented. Older people, menopausal women and andropausal men, take longer to build up “a head of sexual steam,” so to speak. If they’re not attuned to the changes they’re going through, they can easily miss the important cues their body is sending to slow down and enjoy the sensuality.

Of course, I could go on and on, but now I want to leave you with what is the distillation of years my thinking about the role sexuality plays in our life:

I believe that sex is like food. We can enjoy it alone, or with others. We can be abstemious, or gluttonous. We can nosh or nibble; dine or devour. And we can be certain there will be both times of feast and famine.

Sex is like food. It can nourish and sustain us, or it can make us sick. We can consume all the available bounty, or restrict our diet. It can completely satisfy, or leave us devastatingly empty. We can employ it to express our highest aspirations, or allow it to rob us of our soul. We can give it as a gift, or use it as a weapon. It can be both bacchanal and sacrament.

One thing is for sure, whether purely physical or transcendentally spiritual, no one can live without food…or sex.

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