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This is gonna hurt!

Name: Annie
Gender: Female
Age: 23
Location: Miami
Dr. Dick, My boyfriend and I have been having sex for about a year now. He is the first uncircumcised male I have been with. I’ve noticed that lately, it feels like he’s tearing my vaginal opening. He pulls his foreskin forward to lessen the pain, but it still hurts. While examining his penis looking for an answer, I noticed he has a very common condition in uncircumcised males called ‘pearly penile papules’. The papules are rough to the touch in comparison the rest of the phallus. Could this be the cause of my sex woes? Thanks so much!

I’m having a difficult time putting two and two together here, my dear. The painful fucking you describe; this is a new phenomenon, right? You say that even when he pulls his foreskin over his dickhead, you still experience pain when he enters you, is that correct?

See, that’s where I’m having a problem understanding what’s going on. If his foreskin is covering his dickhead, and thus the papules, how could they continue to be an irritant? Surely, you can’t feel the papules through his foreskin, can you? If you can, maybe we’re not dealing with pearly papules.

lovers0147Listen, I know a lot of men who have developed pearly penile papules. Some of these men have mistaken them for genital warts or sign of another STD/SDI, but they are not.

All men are susceptible to these buggers. But interestingly enough, they are more common in younger uncut black guys. They are small, hard, white, pinhead sized bumps that appear on a dude’s dickhead. They are neither painful, nor are they a sign of disease. And they are not contracted or spread through sexual activity.

If a guy has them, he should LEAVE THEM THE FUCK ALONE. Don’t try to squeeze or pop them. If you break the skin doing this, you will leave yourself vulnerable to other more serious infections. Pearly penile papules are harmless and are simply part of maturing. Thy often disappear on their own later in life.

Allow me to repeat myself. Since this is such a common thing in younger men, I can’t see how this is the cause of your discomfort during sex. Either your man has something other than pearly penile papules, or your discomfort comes from another source.

Let me ask you this. When you masturbate, do you insert anything in your pussy? If you don’t maybe that’s a good place to begin to get to the bottom of this mystery. If you can insert a couple of fingers or a dildo into your vagina without discomfort, then we’ll have more information to work with.

If, however, you experience pain in your solo play, then you have something goin on in your pussy that needs immediate attention. You could have an infection or vaginismus.painful-intercoursejr

Do you know what that is? Vaginismus is caused by the involuntary tightening of the pelvic floor muscles, especially the pubococcygeus (PC) muscle group. This will cause discomfort, burning, and painful penetration. That sure sounds like what’s goin on with you, right?

Not to worry, vaginismus is easily treatable. Treatments include a combination of kegel exercises and insertion or dilation training. Why not get back to me with your thoughts on this.

Good luck

Hits The Spot

Hey sex fans!

It’s Product Review Friday once again. And today we bring you a second product from that innovative Canadian company, BodiSpa.

But wait! You didn’t miss our first BodiSpa review, did you? Well not to worry if you did, because you can find it and all our reviews on DrDickSexToyReviews.com. Use the search function in the header, type in “The Almighty” and VOILÀ!

Today Dr Dick Review Crew member, Angie is here with her thoughts and comments on her new massager.

The Ultimate —— $69.95

Angie
Hello everyone! This is only my second review so far this year. My previous review posted last February. My, how time flies. Those of you who follow my reviews will, no doubt, be expecting an update on how I’m doing. For those unfamiliar with my situation, here’s the back-story. I was diagnosed with lymphoma over two years ago. I first mentioned this in a review I posted on April 27th, 2012.

I’ve had a few setbacks recently, nothing major, but just enough to remind me that I’m still livingUltimate-Massager1 through the cancer and the truly horrible interventions that are supposedly keeping me alive. My libido ebbs and flows and I’ve made my peace with that. I don’t suppose I’ll ever get back to the way I once enjoyed my sexuality and the sexual connection I had with my husband. But as Dr Dick keeps telling me, it’s best that I focus on the new normal; what is possible for me now as opposed to how things were, in even the recent past. That’s pretty sage advice for us all, don’t you think?

Today I happily bring you my review of a marvelous wand-type massager, The Ultimate. I read with great interest the review, my fellow Review Crew members, Kevin and Gina, posted of their BodiSpa massager, The Almighty. I thought to myself, wow, wouldn’t that be a nice to have. I loved the idea of a massager that had both a warming and cooling capability. Then I reconsidered my envy. I couldn’t handle such a big and heavy massager. Heck, nowadays I sometimes have a difficult time maneuvering my trusty Hitachi.  Sometimes I simply don’t have the strength.

However my new more diminutive massager, The Ultimate, is not only the perfect size for me, it is amazingly light. Despite being 10 1/2″ tall it weighs in at just over seven ounces. What a godsend. Now I can once again enjoy the power of a wand-type massager without the heft generally associated with those behemoths.

The thing is, when I first removed The Ultimate from its attractive box, I though to myself, oh dear, it’s so light, it can’t possibly deliver the intense vibrations I’m used to. Happily, I was wrong about that. This massager has two speeds and both deliver substantial vibration. I wonder how they packed so much power into such a handily handy thing.

Ultimate-Zoomed-inThe next best feature is The Ultimate has an adjustable head. It has an adjustment button three quarters up the handle that allows me to angle the vibrating head in three different positions. This is such a brilliant feature that, now that I’m used to it, I wonder how I ever lived without. No more struggling to get the vibe precisely where I want it. What a treat!

The Ultimate is also cordless. That’s right it’s rechargeable. It’s like BodiSpa read my mind. Even in my healthy days, I used to hate being tethered to an outlet. My trusty Hitachi is grand, but I would inevitably get all tangled in the cord or move to a position beyond the cord’s reach.

The controls are in the handle. The Ultimate has an easy to use slide control with three positions — off, low and high. The traditional shaped head is made of latex-free, nonporous, phthalate-free, and hypoallergenic silicone. It features four different surfaces — ribbed, nubby, smooth and bumpy. And if that weren’t enough the head flexes for even more comfort.

I mentioned earlier that my libido isn’t what it used to be, but The Ultimate isn’t only for self-pleasuring, it massages away my cares and woes and aches and pains, which I seem to have more and more of these days, in the most efficient manner.
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

Where went the wood?

Name: bob
Gender: Male
Age: 26
Location: pa
(Never happened before) But I couldn’t get it up tonight, and this chick was H OT. Now I’m not gay at all, but I haven’t had sex in about 3 years because I was locked up…so I masturbated pretty regularly about 3 or 4 times a week. But I can’t figure out why I was soft… the only thing I can think of is “I ate clams tonight and I’ve never had them before. Could it be that or should I get checked out?

It weren’t the clams, my friend! And I don’t think you need to get check out, either…at least not right away. If you could back away from the situation a little bit and stop freakin’ out. I think you’d discover the source of your problem all on your own.

Here’s the thing, while you were out of commission, there in the jailhouse, you relied on, as you say, jerkin’ off. Ok, cool. We all gotta get by somehow. Now the first time you try to score after your release; you go soft. This tells me you have a mild case of performance anxiety. We all get that from time to time.dessert

There’s probably nothing wrong with you or with your johnson. You just got the jitters first time you tried to get you some fine pussy after bein’ away, that’s all.

The anticipation of bonin’ this HOT chick, fueled by some predictable self-consciousness; what with just gettin out of the slammer and all, pulled the plug on your wood. No surprise there, right?

What I don’t want to see happen is for you to replay the incident over and over in your mind’s eye till that’s all I can think about. Hey, maybe that’s already happening. If it is, this proverbial molehill will, sure enough, become a mountain. You’ll then bring all this anxiety to your next encounter. Setting you up for even more disappointment. You can see how this shit can snowball, right?

If you interpret every less than satisfying encounter as a failure, your fears will become self-fulfilling. You’ll begin to avoid partnered sex and you’ll develop a full-blown sexual dysfunction. Your self-esteem will take a nosedive too.

If you are preoccupied with your performance, it’s less likely that you’ll be fully present during sex with a partner. This pretty much fucks up your sexual responsiveness and any hope for spontaneity. Don’t let this happen to you, Bob. Why not just relax into the whole sex thing and not try to prove your manhood or your sexual prowess with your pecker?

Good luck

The Erotic Mind of Kyle Henry — Podcast #382 — 07/15/13


Hey sex fans, welcome back.

So after a two-week hiatus from podcasting so that I could have the time I needed to put the finishing touches on my latest book, The Erotic Mind series resumes today with a vengeance. And I have amazing news. Today’s podcast breaks new ground. As you know, I’ve hosted numerous authors, illustrators, photographers, artists, and comic book makers in this series, but I’ve never had a chance to chat with someone who works in the medium of film.

Kyle Henry directs FOURPLAY 02

Today I have the distinct pleasure of welcoming the award winning filmmaker, Kyle Henry. He is here to discuss his movie: FOURPLAY; Tales of Sexual Intimacy, and all the other stuff I’ve been dyin’ to ask him since I saw his movie when it premiered here in The Emerald city last spring.

Kyle and I discuss:

  • Too many first names;
  • Community of indy filmmakers;
  • Dealing with sex and sexuality in an open and honest way;
  • FOURPLAY; Tales of Sexual Intimacy;
  • Sex and shame;
  • Sex as a consumer product
  • Working with the screenwriters;
  • His previous films;
  • The role of the director;
  • Becoming Kyle.

Kyle invites you to visit him on his site HERE ! And be sure to like his film’s page on Facebook HERE !

(Click on the box art below to buy or stream Kyle’s movie.)

fourplayDVD

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for all my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: LibidoStack.

LS_landscape-banner

Never too old

Hey sex fans!

Before we get to today’s Q&A, I have two announcements. First, allow me to introduce you to my new Tumblr site: SEx AdViCe wITH An EDGe. It’s deliciously smutty, don’t cha know. Second, podcasts will resume this coming Monday with a remarkable guest, erotic filmmaker, Kyle Henry.

Alrighty, now to my correspondent.

Name: Macwinhar
Gender: Male (I’m gonna guess)
Age:
Location:
DR. DICK, We have been together almost 25 years. I feel like we need to spice it up. He has had some health issues with knee replacements. He feels he is not a good top any longer. But for me is, that is not the issue. It is not about the topping as is about the intimacy. I am not sure what to do? HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sexual boredom often sets in to long-term relationships. And the health issues that accompany the aging process can also throw a wrench in the sexual works, so to speak. These challenges can either be an opportunity for some creative problem solving or they can completely extinguish sexual interest all together.andropause3

I’m disappointed in you, sir! You suggest in your message that butt fuckin’ is the only sexual expression open to you fellas. Surely, you can be a bit more resourceful than that. Have you taken the time to check in with your partner lately to inquire about his sexual needs and desires? If not, I suggest you begin the rehabilitation of your sexual mojo there.

Let me ask you a few pointed questions. Could you guys invite a third party to join you as a periodic sexual playmate? Ya know what they say; “Twosies beat onesies, but nothing be threes.”

How about a little role-playing, a new sex toy, or something kinky, maybe some BDSM perhaps. It’s easy to lose interest in sex when the play is boring, repetitive and ho-hum.

Here’s what I want you guys to do, and I do mean both of you. I want you to mozie on over to my online sex emporium and pick out something new and interesting. Look for the MY STOCKROOM banner in the sidebar for access to this great resource. I want you to pick something for him and I want him to pick something for you.

sexy daddiesI’ve put together a dazzling array of products that will liven up even the most humdrum sex life. Pay particular attention to the COUPLES section of My Stockroom. You’ll find loads of interesting things for couples of every stripe.

Still not sure what to buy? Take a look at my ever so popular adult product review site, Dr Dick’s Sex Toy Reviews.

There are several sex manuals available in MY STOCKROOM, and even more elsewhere online. You could consult one of them for ideas if you can’t tap into your own god-given queer creativity.

Just in case this hasn’t crossed your mind, us men folk go through physiological and hormonal changes in midlife, just like women do. There’s even a name for it — andropause — the male menopause as it were. http://www.drdicksextoyreviews.com/ As we age, both women and men need more time and stimulation to get aroused. So keep that in mind as you shop for your new sexual accessories. Look for things that will enhance and extend the arousal phase of sex play.sexy daddies 02

Increased focus on sensuality, intimacy, and communication will help a sexual relationship stay rich and rewarding even well into one’s senior years. If you’re not talking to you partner about the issues as they arise; you are missing an opportunity to course-correct at the most beneficial time, while the issue is front and center. Need some help communicating? Why not connect with a sex-positive therapist in your area for a little refresher course.

If your old man is avoiding butt fucking because of his knees, you guys might consider trying a new position, one that won’t involve him being on his knees. Look for my tutorial on sex positions: Basic Sexual Positions For One And All! And if that don’t solve your problem, there are still many ways of expressing his ardor that don’t involve his knees. How about some sensual massage, erotic bondage, or some good old-fashioned mutual masturbation with a swell new sex toy like the Fleshlight?

Remember sex oughta be an adventure even for an old “married” couple like you guys. If you don’t take all the opportunities to make things adventurous as they present themselves, you will find that these opportunities will simply vanish. And you’ll be shit out of luck then, darlin’.

Good Luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!