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Dude dilemmas…

Name: Mike P
Gender:
Age: 25
Location: LA
My girlfriend needs to watch lesbian porn to get off and sometimes kicks me out of the bedroom to masturbate by herself. Initially I was turned on by her desire to watch porn — but now — it’s become a blockage. She always needs porn. I am frustrated and to make things worse — she has started abusing me through financial manipulation. She makes me pay her rent — pay for her food, pay for everything — and she never gives me nookie.
Should I leave this woman?

Time to wake up, fella! Your “girlfriend” — and you’ll notice I put that term in quotes — is decidedly not YOUR girlfriend, and possibly not any dude’s girlfriend.

I’m gonna go way out on a limb here and say; I think your “girlfriend” is a certifiable, died-in-the wool, muff-divin’, coozie-lovin’ lesbitarian. All that’s really left for her to do to make the picture perfectly clear…even for you, is to show up one day in a mullet and a plaid flannel shirt. Holy cow, Mike, how is it that you are missing the obvious?

Listen, bub, it’s clear to me, you’re excess baggage. She keeps you around for comic relief…oh and to foot the bill.

Should you leave this woman, you ask. Honey, she’s beaten you to the punch on that one. She’s long gone and left you way behind, at least emotionally and sexually. All that’s left for you to do is find the door and say good-bye to this embarrassing situation.

Name: Leslie
Gender:
Age: 46
Location: Brisbane
Will bicycling make me impotent?

YIKES Leslie, what kind of bike riding are you doing that would put such a notion in your head?

My initial response to your question, of course, was a wisecrack. “Sure, bike riding will make you impotent if you get your balls caught in the spokes. Throw those things over your shoulder when you ride, for christ sake!”

Then I thought to myself, “Wait, what does Leslie mean by impotent?” I know lots of people confuse and/or conflate the two very different concepts of impotency and sterility. So maybe this is an opportunity to sort this out some.

Impotence is characterized by a dude’s inability to develop or maintain an erection. And I suppose extreme bike riding, like the kind I often see on TV, could possibly cause this condition. Especially, if you are knocking your cock around enough to cause your darling little willie serious injury.

Male sterility, on the other hand, is the inability of the male reproductive system (a dude’s balls, basically) to produce enough (or even any live) sperm for the purpose of impregnation. The reason I bring this up is, I know fertility specialists are very concerned about men wearing tight-fitting underwear and pants for long periods of time. (We used to call these cheap hotel pants — there’s no ballroom! Get it?) Tight fitting garments elevate a man’s nuts to the base of his pelvis, which in turn increases the temperature in his huevos. Too much heat kills the little juniors in our baby-batter, don’t cha know!

The reason evolution designed our family jewels to reside outside our bodies and actually hang off of and away from our bodies is so that all our adorable little sperm buddies can stay relatively cool and comfortable till they blissfully shoot out of our dick into a vagina, asshole, condom or Kleenex.

Tighty-whities and all such things, particular those obscenely clingy spandex (which is basically glorified plastic) bike shorts makes things even hotter.  They’re notorious sperm killers! So in a way, Leslie, yes, biking can make you sterile if not impotent.

Good Luck ya’ll!

A Spot of Heavy Breathing

Name: Bob
Gender: male
Age: 40
Location:
I’m a bisexual male. Recently I’ve been seeing this black guy, 25 years old, with a very big 9” very thick cock. We’ve been suckin’ and he’s been fuckin me. But most recently he’s been wanting me to get together with two or three of his friends and have a party. I mostly want to do it, but I’m a little scared. Would I be able to handle 2 or 3 guys? Would I be able to take all their cocks up my ass? I need some advice.

Bob, you are a little breathless, huh? I’m so delighted you stopped by with this tantalizing tidbit. So let’s get this straight, so to speak. You’ve got this heavy hung black dude, 15 years your junior, rockin’ your world with his thick 9”. Oh sure, count your money in front of the poor, why don’t cha? Say, all of us here at Dr Dick’s Sex Advice are wondering; how in the world did you get this dazzling urban specimen to tap your honky ass in the first place?

But there’s more…besides your amazing good fortune with this one fella, your young playmate wants to introduce you to a few of his big boned bruthas for some hot group action. Mmmm, how you do go on, sir! I suppose it’s only natural to be a bit intimidated, what with all that weighty pipe that will be swinging around. All I can say is I hope you film the event for posterity, darling. Because if you don’t no one, not even me, will ever believe you.

You want some advice? How could I possibly advise someone who can handle…and I quote “a very big 9” very thick cock.” If that’s truly the case, you don’t need nothin’ from me. Let’s just hope your hole will be able to withstand the massive gang fuck. And that’ll depend on one thing — you being as big of an insatiable bottom as you are a braggart. If you are, you’ll have no trouble at all.

Good luck…you’re gonna need it.

Name: Ben
Gender: Male
Age: 17
Location: New York, New York
Dr- I have read up on some of the questions you have answered and realized why my penis is curved. Because I began to masturbate in sixth grade! (The older boys on the bus encouraged me too) Now I know that this may sound dumb. But is there any way to fix this? I haven’t ever even had a blowjob, or hand job because I’m so timid about a girl seeing my penis. I’m also scared to call anywhere, and when the doctor asks me if I have any questions about my body I’m even to scared to say yes to that. Should I ask the doctor about it just too see if there is a way to fix my penis, or is there a natural way to fix it with a special kind of vitamin that I can take? Thanks a ton! -Ben

Hey Ben, why are you being such are a scaredy cat? I mean how bad a curve does your dick have that you would avoid a blowjob or even a hand job when offered? Is it really that misshapen? I mean, how many erect cocks have you seen in your short life span that you can say for sure that your unit is so fatally flawed? Can you be absolutely certain that the curve of your johnson isn’t just a normal variation on an otherwise handsome and hearty tool?

Listen pup, even a precocious masturbator like you is unlikely to change the shape of his willie simply by jerking off. That’s not to say that one’s dick can’t run into trouble from injury or abuse. For as hearty a plaything as it is, our cock, it is a relatively delicate instrument. When you get a woody, your cock is engorged with oxygen-rich blood, which is essential for the upkeep of the smooth muscle tissue. This kind of tissue makes up about 90% of your cock. So you can see how a healthy circulatory system is to a vibrant sex life.

If you dissected your woody and looked at a cross-section you’d see three distinct spongy tubular structures, each are made up of smooth muscle tissue. Two of these tubular structures — one on either side of your cock, both of which run the length of your cock — are called the corpora cavernosa. These marvelous structures become engorged with blood lifting and thickening your cock to erection. The corpus spongiosum, the third tubular structure is located just below the corpora cavernosa. This baby houses your urethra, through which urine and semen pass during urination and ejaculation, respectively. This may also become slightly engorged with blood, but less so than the corpora cavernosa.

An oxygen-deprived cock will build up a kind of plaque, which resembles scar tissue. This will cripple a dude’s rod (Peyronie’s disease) or rob him of his wood altogether. However, I don’t think this is the case for you.

So before you start tryin to “heal” or “fix” yourself with some contraption or herbal supplement visit a doctor first. If you’re too timid to make an appointment with your family physician, go to a free clinic, or neighborhood clinic near you. You’re living in the big apple for crying out loud; you have all these great resources available to you.

Good luck

Catalyst

Hey sex fans,

We got a handful more than a handful of interesting toys to tell you about today, so let’s get at it.

Our first product comes to us from a manufacturer new to our product review effort. We welcome Xmybox.  Don’t ya just love that name?

Here’s Dr Dick Review Crew member, Christa with the lowdown.

Dew Drop —— $59.95

Christa
Happy New Year, fellow perverts! I’m beginning my 3rd year with the Dr Dick Review Crew, if you can believe that. I remember back in November 2008 when I got my first assignment, I was like blown away with all the free stuff. Then I realized that I was being offered all the products that no one else wanted to review. I imagined Dr Dick saying; “lets give this to that freak Christa, she’ll love it!”

Hey, I don’t mind, I am a freak and proud of it. Besides, I think us freaks have a shit-load more fun then the rest of you. But I digress.

Now that I’m a long-term reviewer, I’m getting more mainstream stuff to review. That’s fine by me too. Take today’s product, for example. There’s nothing freaky or even kinky about the Dew Drop. It’s basically a vibrating egg made of hard plastic. There are a few interesting features beyond the obvious, like it has it’s own handle. They call a “dropper”, that kind of attaches to the egg, by way of a clear plastic cord. This makes the insertion of the vibrating egg into a pussy (mine or yours) pretty easy. A nice personal lube is required; at least it is for me. And since the Dew Drop is hard plastic, you can use whatever kind of lube you want. I used a silicone-based lube.

Once the egg is deposited in said pussy (mine or yours) you remove the “dropper” leaving the clear plastic cord. It’s exactly like a tampon, only completely different.

And get this; the vibrating egg is operated by a remote control, which is very, very cool. Those tiny watch batteries operate both the egg and the controller and they are included in the package, thank you very much!

The vibration is not going to knock your socks off, but there are 6 vibration patterns and 8 speeds. The controller is easy to handle and operate and is effective from up to 10 yards away.

Of course, once my sub, butt-boy BF, Alex saw the Dew Drop he wanted to try it in his ass. He’s this total ass whore, ya know. But I refused. Not that I don’t think his hungry hole couldn’t accommodate the modestly sized egg, on the contrary. It’s that I didn’t trust the clear plastic cord or its connection to the egg to withstand pulling the egg out of his ass. This is regrettable! Because I would have had a load of fun remotely operating the vibration while it was lodged in his ass and we were at the Homo Depot! Maybe the Xmybox folks could work on a model that didn’t have such a flimsy connection.
Full Review HERE!

Now a couple of swell toys from our favorite retailer — Adult Sex Toys .com.

Nexus O —— $73.92

Kevin
I’m starting off the new year with an excellent toy. Allow me to introduce you to the brilliant O from Nexus.

But before I get to the review I have a bone to pick. The package says that the O a male G-spot massager. I have a big problem with that. I assume the Nexus people are trying to educate the public about the male prostate, or P-spot, but likening it to a G-spot, I think, only muddies the waters. To tell you the truth, I don’t much like the term P-spot either. It’s so adolescent.

Listen folks, men have prostates. Your prostate is a highly erogenous zone, if you’ve discovered yours or not. Stimulating your prostate is not only intensely pleasurable, but it’s also beneficial in terms of prostate health. So if a company like Nexus wants to educate the public about this, I suggest that they quit beating around the bush and call a spade a spade. That’s what I’m going to do.

The Nexus O is an extraordinary prostate massager. It has an amazingly simple design, but it delivers a surprising amount of stimulation. Its velvety feel comes from it being fashioned from 100% high-grade silicone. It has three pleasure points (balls) that arouse the two major pleasure points on a guys anatomy; the prostate and the taint (perineum), and area just behind your nuts. And the unique O design keeps the massage in place.

Having the Nexus O stay in place is essential to its effectiveness, because this is supposed to be a hands-free pleasure device. You can wear it while you’re beatin off, while you’re goin down on your partner, or while you’re fuckin you’re partner. It’s that brilliant.

Regular prostate massage considerably increases my ejaculate. I also find that, if I wear the Nexus O for at least a half hour before Gina and I play together, my erection is stronger and lasts longer. I’m not sure why this is, it I can vouch for the effect.

There are no batteries to worry about; in fact, it’s not actually a vibrator. It’s a massager that works its magic while I sit on it, rock back and forth or just walk around. I can clench my sphincter muscles while I have the Nexus O wedged in my ass, I can also work on my kegels. These are indispensable exercises for any guy who is into his ass. The Nexus O is decidedly low-tech, but it works. Instructions for use are on the inside panel of the package insert.
Full Review HERE!

As you will see, Denise takes me to task for an unintended oversight.

Alumina Pace —— $59.71

Denise
I had to have a little talk with Dr Dick a while back. I noticed that all the cool anal toys, like butt plugs, were being reviewed by only the guys in the Review Crew. “What’s up with that,” I asked. “A lot of us ladies like ass play too.” In his defense, Dr Dick said that he’s an equal opportunity ass-pleaser. And if I wanted to pleasure myself where the sun don’t shine, he had just the thing for me.

As luck would have it, my challenge to the boys only rule, which wasn’t really a rule, came at them most opportune time. It scored me this stunning 100% aeronautic grade aluminum plug, the Alumina Pace, by Tantus.

Tantus is famous for their beautiful silicone toys. We’ve reviewed several of them already. And as much as I love silicone, this aluminum plug is everything I could want.

The Alumina Pace is both stylish and functional. It is not a particularly big insertable; it’s about five inches long and the diameter is 1 1/4″ at its widest point. And it’s actually a doubleheader. You can insert either end!

The aeronautic grade aluminum is, of course, phthalate-free and non-porous. The Alumina Pace can be sterilized, which is important if you wish to share it with someone else. Soap and water is all you need for general cleanup, but you can also toss it in the dishwasher, boil it, or wipe it down with a 10% bleach or peroxide solution. It’s that easy.

The heft of the aluminum is also a plus. This distinguishes this plug from say a silicone plug. The extra weight is really nice. The teardrop shape of the one head and the bulbous shape to the other head both make for easy insertion and comfortable wearing. But both ends provide distinctive sensations.

The Alumina Pace can be both warmed and chilled for added sensations. If you’ve never had an insertable that you can enjoy in this fashion, I highly recommend you give it a try.
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

SEX WISDOM with Bruno Bond — Podcast #241 – 10/27/10


Hey sex fans,

And now for the exciting conclusion of my conversation with that squared jaw hunk, one of the hardest working men in porn today, Bruno Bond. This is Part 2 of his appearance on this show. He’s here as part of the Sex EDGE-U-cation and the SEX WISDOM series. And he has even more juicy inside information on the gay porn scene to share.

But wait, you didn’t miss Part 1 of our conversation, that appeared here last week at this time, did you? Well don’t worry if ya did, because you can find it and all my podcasts in the Podcast Archive right here on my site. Look for the search function in the header, type in Podcast #240 and Voilà! But don’t forget the #sign when you do your search.

Bruno and I discuss:

  • Filming sexual tableaus and free form, live action films;
  • Erections on demand;
  • His four factors of being a successful porn star;
  • Becoming desensitized to all the sex;
  • Drug use in the industry;
  • Having the talent reserve their sexual energy;
  • Promoting safer sex;
  • Editing porn films;
  • Being a natural in front of the camera;
  • How he got his nom de porn;
  • His thoughts about gay-for-pay performers.

Bruno invites you to visit him on his personal website HERE! And at his XXX membership site HERE!

Click on the thumbnails below to view another slideshow

of Bruno and his friends at work and play.

[nggallery id=88]

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously, or just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s Podcast is bought to you by: Fleshlight & FleshJack.

Therapy Available

I’m a Clinical Sexologist in private practice here in Seattle. I’ve been a practitioner of psychotherapy, sex therapy and relationship counseling for over 30 years. I am a sex positive and kink aware helping professional.

I am available weekdays, some evenings and weekends so you can comfortably fit your sessions in around your work, family and social life.

If you would like to talk to someone about your sexual thoughts, feelings, lifestyles and/or experiences then arrange for a consultation at our mutual convenience.

WHAT I OFFER / THERAPY, COUNSELING, CONSULTING or COACHING SESSIONS
I provide therapy in a variety ways —

  • on the telephone
  • online
  • in person

All sessions are 60 minutes in duration. Telephone and online appointments are paid for in advance via Paypal.

Here’s a bit more about the way I work.

I don’t believe therapy should become a lifestyle. Thus, my therapeutic intervention is short term, goal directed and personally liberating. I generally contract with my client(s) for four, six or eight visits (clients of course can terminate at any time). This way we build in an automatic termination date, keeping all of us focused on the goal and honest about the progress we’re making. And, more importantly, the end is always in sight. Rarely do I see client(s) for more than eight session in a row. If my client(s) doesn’t have what he/she/they need to work independently on the problems he/she/they face by that time, then I didn’t do my job properly.

I also firmly believe in at-home-work and journaling. These things keep my client(s) integrated and involved throughout his/her/their with me. Our time together will be concentrated, so there will little time to waste…either yours or mine.

My fee is $110 per session. I do, however, offer a sliding fee schedule for those who have need of that.

You’re welcome to contact me for an appointment if you’d like to move forward with this. You can reach me at: dr_dick@drdicksexadvice.com

TELEPHONE
Some people find it easier to talk about intimate aspects of their life over the phone rather than in person. Access therapy from the comfort and privacy of your own home, car or office. Telephone therapy helps get round geographical, transport and mobility issues.

ONLINE
I can also provide my services via the most commonly used chat and message platforms such as Skype, Yahoo Messenger, etc.

SCHEDULE THERAPY
To book your therapy session(s) email me your preferred date and time dr_dick@drdicksexadvice.com. We will then arrange your preferred payment method. Sessions can be made in block bookings or singly whatever suits your budget and commitments. Early booking is advisable.

CANCELLATIONS
A 24 hours notice is required from the client to cancel or change a booked appointment time. Clients will not be entitled to a refund or an alternative appointment if a cancellation is made with less than 24 hours notice.

PUNCTUALITY
All sessions will start and end at the agreed time. Late calls or visits will result in a shorter consultation. All consultations are by appointment only.

SERVICES
Clinical services cover a full range of sexual heath concerns including:

— Guilt associated with religious upbringing or training.
— Sexual trauma and/or sexual abuse
— Conflicts or sexual dissatisfaction between partners.
— Ejaculation and/or erection concerns.
— Orgasm concerns.
— Sexual orientation/lifestyle preference.
— Sexual inhibitions.
— Socio-sexual skills.
— Sexual misinformation.
— Love and sexuality.
— Jealousy and possessiveness.
— Poor body image.
— Unsatisfactory sexual outlet.
— Safe-sex concerns.
— Sexuality and illness or disability.
— Sexuality and grieving.

My practice combines the best of a short-term cognitive behavioral therapy model with a compassionate, person-orientated counseling technique. My purpose is to help clients come to terms with their sexual problems and conflicts as these relate to their own life values, expectations and goals.

My services are open to individuals, couples, families and groups, of any sexual persuasion, who have sexual concerns. I am available for lectures, workshops, and in-service training.

BACKGROUND
Since the completion of my doctoral studies in 1981 I have been involved in a wide range of sexological activities including counseling, teaching, lecturing, writing, publishing, video production, in-service training and facilitating groups and workshops.

I’ve been writing this online sex advice column for well over fifteen years now.
I am the founder and former Executive Director of the nonprofit organization, PARADIGM; Enhancing Life Near Death — an outreach and resource for terminally ill, chronically ill, elder and dying people.

My therapeutic training includes The Institute for Advanced Study in Human Sexuality San Francisco, The University of California, San Francisco Human Sexuality Unit, and The Pacific Center for Human Growth, Berkeley.
Besides my sexological training I carry a Masters degree in Theology from the Jesuit School of Theology, Berkeley.

I am Board certified by The American College of Sexologists, The American Board of Sexology and The American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists.

Richard Wagner, M.Div., Ph.D., ACS





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