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Recharge your sexual energy

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If lack of energy has drained your sex life, there are ways to reignite the passion.

close-up of a mature couple relaxing in bed at home

Your sexual drive can stay high late in life, but often your energy for sex can diminish. Low energy not only affects your sex life, but can carry over to other parts of your life, too. You can become apathetic, no longer find pleasure in favorite activities, and become more sedentary.

However, many of these issues related to lost sexual energy can be addressed. “Never think lack of energy means an end to your sex life, and there is nothing you can do about it,” says Dr. Sharon Bober, director of the Harvard-affiliated Dana-Farber Sexual Health Program. “There are many strategies you can adopt to get back in the game.”

Find your energy drainers

Your lost sexual vim and vigor is often related to some kind of physical, emotional, or relationship issue. Here’s a look at the most common causes.

Low hormones. Lack of sexual energy could be due to male hypogonadism, which occurs when the testicles do not produce enough testosterone, the male sex hormone. In fact, fatigue is one of the most common side effects.

Testosterone levels drop about 1% each year beginning in a man’s late 30s, and could fall by as much as 50% by age 70. (A blood test from your doctor can determine if you have low testosterone.) Testosterone replacement therapy, which is given via absorbable pellet implants, topical gels, patches, and injections, can often help spark sexual energy in men with low levels.

Findings from a study published online Aug. 1, 2016, by The Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism showed that a year of testosterone therapy improved libido in 275 men (average age 72) with confirmed low testosterone. Compared with men in a placebo group, frequency of sexual arousal increased by about 50%, and they were able to have almost twice as many erections.

Speak with your doctor about whether testosterone therapy is an option for you. Long- term risks are not well known, but there is concern for an increased risk of heart disease and prostate problems.

Erectile dysfunction. Men with erectile dysfunction can experience low energy because the condition can be a blow to their self-esteem. “Men may feel embarrassed about it or worry they will be judged in some way if they cannot perform as well as they once did, so motivation and energy for sex gets depleted,” says Dr. Bober.

In this case, speak with your doctor about taking an ED drug or exploring other options for getting or keeping an erection, like using a penile pump.

Even though talking about ED may be difficult, it’s important to open up lines of communication with your partner. “For many men, it can help relieve stress to know they are not alone and someone is there for support.”

Poor sleep. Lack of sleep can be one of the main energy zappers. Poor sleep can increase stress levels and interfere with how your body and brain store and use energy, which is why you feel so sluggish after not sleeping well. And if you are tired, you have less energy for sex. Talk with your doctor if you have trouble sleeping. Steps like changing medication or dose, cognitive behavioral therapy, and adjusting your diet and sleeping environment can often improve sleep quality.

Lack of movement. When you have no sexual energy, you need to get moving. Regular exercise is one of the best natural energy boosters. Numerous studies have linked exercise with improving fatigue, especially among sedentary people. You don’t need much to get a jolt — 2.5 hours per week of moderate-intensity exercise can do the trick. Focus on a combination of cardio and weight-bearing exercises like brisk walking and strength training.

Get checked out

Many medical conditions can affect sexual drive, such as obesity, diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, and high cholesterol. So be diligent about regular medical check-ups. Also, many drugs, including blood pressure drugs, antidepressants, and tranquilizers can produce erectile difficulties. Consult with your doctor if you take any of these.

Back in sync

Lack of energy also could be relationship-oriented, if you and your partner are not in sexual sync. For instance, you may have energy for sex, but your partner doesn’t, or at least not at the same level.

“Sex may not always be comfortable for women because of menopausal symptoms like vaginal dryness. If sexual activity is physically uncomfortable, not surprisingly, a woman’s sex drive also diminishes,” says Dr. Bober. “This can affect both partners, and if a man is worried that he might hurt his partner, that will certainly affect his interest in sex, too.”

In this situation, you need to communicate with your partner about how important sex is to you. It’s not about making demands, but about finding ways to explore mutual goals, such as pleasure and closeness.

“Perhaps it means negotiating a compromise just like you do in other aspects of a relationship,” says Dr. Bober. “Partners find ways to share everything from household chores to bill planning, and sex shouldn’t be any different.”

There’s a lot of room to find common ground, she adds. “There are many ways to be sexually active with your partner besides traditional intercourse. For example, you can ask your partner to be with you when you pleasure yourself, which feels intimate and can allow both partners to feel connected.”

Talk about it

Sometimes the sexual barrier is not about sex at all. An open dialogue also can reveal issues beneath the surface that may interfere with your partner’s sexual energy.

“Your partner may desire sex as much as you, but there may be underlying problems in the relationship that could affect sexual desire and need to be addressed,” says Dr. Bober.

Finally, another way to ignite lost sexual energy is to do new things together. “Couples can get into routines that can make for boring sex lives,” says Dr. Bober. “It can be fun to speak with your partner about ways to keep the relationship interesting and erotic.”

Many times, this can be done outside the bedroom, like having more date nights, going for long weekend romantic getaways, or even doing simple activities together like joining a club or taking a class.

“Investing in change can energize both you and your partner, and most important, pave the way for a renewed sense of closeness and novelty that is great for all couples,” says Dr. Bober.

Complete Article HERE!

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A Beginner’s Pleasure Kit For Men

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Hey sex fans!

It’s Product Review Friday once again. Today we bring you a kit of pleasure products for men produced by NS Novelties. These products come to us from ManShop.

Back with us today is one of the newest members of the Dr Dick Review Crew, Trevor, who will show us around.

Renegade Men’s Pleasure Kit #1 —— $29.95

Trevor
Hello again! I’m here to talk about the Renegade Men’s Pleasure Kit #1. It’s just one of the pleasure kits NS Novelties makes.

Before I get to the contents of the box, a quick word about the packaging. It’s handsome in a manly sort of way. The front of the black cardboard box features embossed images of the three toys in the kit. They identify the toys as a Silicone Triad Ring, (read: glorified cockring) Silicone Plug Small, (read: butt plug) and finally, a TPR Stroker (read: wanker sleeve). The back of the box features a see-through cutout of the toys along with an illustration of how to use the Triad Ring. I’m glad they did that because I was completely stumped as to what to do with the thing when I first saw it.

Inside the box there is a clear plastic clamshell sort of deal that houses the three toys.

So now that we know what the box contains let’s look at each toy in turn. I’m going to start with the Triad Ring. Like I said I was totally miffed by what I held in my hand. It looks like a figure 8 with an extra loop. Each of the three rings are a slightly different diameter. Once I saw the illustration on the box I figured it out. You can stack them or spread them out. The largest of the loops is used like a traditional cockring. It is made of silicone, so that’s good. It’s also stretchy so that I can easily get it around my cock and balls. (BTW, if you don’t know what a cockring is or why you would want to wear one; check out Dr Dick’s tutorial: Cockring Crash Course.)

Once I had the largest of the rings in place I attempted to stuff my balls through the middle ring. This wasn’t at all easy. You see, the smaller the rings get the less give they have for stretching. I don’t want to brag but I have big balls and it was a struggle getting it on. I finally had to resort to using some water-based lube to assist me with this. Finally, I had to fit my cock through the smallest ring. This was a bit easier, but the lube helped too. Once I had the blasted thing in place I had to take a breather. Here’s a tip: if you plan to use the Triad Ring for sex with a partner, be sure you put it on way before you initiate sex with your partner. It would be a total buzz kill trying to wrangle this thing into place while your partner is patiently waiting. Also, if ya try to put this on when you already have a boner, you’ll lose the stiffy well before you get into place. Maybe that’s a good thing.

Personally I found the Triad Ring overkill. I love wearing a cockring and it is very helpful keeping an erection, but the Triad Ring wasn’t very comfortable and it didn’t do anything extra to enhance my erection.

Next we have the Silicone Plug Small. Again, it’s made of silicone, which is very good. If you don’t know this already, you can only use water-based lube with this silicone toy. And if you are a novice butt pirate, be sure to use a lot of lube, both on the toy and in you hole before you attempt insertion.

I’m kinda new to anal pleasuring so I appreciated that the Silicone Plug was of the small variety. It’s not too much larger than a stout finger. (BTW, if you are unsure of what a butt plug is or why you would want to use one; check out Dr Dick’s tutorial: Butt Plug Crash Course.)

I liked the Silicone Plug a lot. I mostly use it when I’m alone. I can wear this thing for hours without irritation. It gives me intense prostate stimulation and I can even bust a nut without much stroking and just from the prostate stimulation alone. Very cool!

 

Now that I got the hang of this but plug thing, I’m gonna try a slightly larger one. I may even start to wear it when I’m having a shag with my GF, Shelia. That should give her something to talk about.

Finally, we have the TPR Stroker. I had to look up TPR. TPR = Thermo Plasticized Rubber. I found that TPR is commonly used in adult toys due to cost effectiveness, and ease of manufacturing. These materials can range from soft and flexible to firm and stiff. The good news is these elastomers do NOT have phthalates in them. And they are safe for those with a latex allergies. The bad news is the products containing TPR, while compatible with water and silicone based lubricants, are not compatible with oils, like massage oil. They are also not non-porous, so they can’t be sterilized, like silicone can, so there’s no sharing this toy with anyone else. These products should not be stored touching other plastic items, as they may interact poorly and melt. ☹

The TPR Stroker, curiously enough, has a set of finger rings on the side so you can have a secure grip while you stroke it up and down your cock. I thought that was funny because it seems pretty superfluous to me. It only has an insertable length of just less than 5”. My cock is 7” and pretty thick, so this was not designed with me in mind. The hole you stick your dick into is pretty small too and I couldn’t insert my willie without a big glob of lube. I used water-based lube. The inside of the stroker is ribbed for my pleasure.

I’ve used a number of strokers in the past; this is my least favorite, mostly because it wasn’t the right size for me. You might like it better than I do.

After using it a couple of times and washing it thoroughly in warm water and mild soap I noticed that the TPR began to get tacky. That was a bummer because I didn’t want to touch it after that. BTW, air-drying it is the only thing you can do. Don’t try to dry it with a cloth.

The other two toys, the Silicone Plug and Triad Ring, are made of silicone and they are really easy to clean. Toss them into the skink with mild soap and warm water, scrub them down a bit, and let it air dry. Or you can just wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution to sanitize for sharing.

In the end, I thought this kit was a mixed bag. I liked the butt plug, the Triad Ring was just OK, and the TPR Stroker was a bust. On the plus side, the price is right for the kit. You can get it for under $30.

Full Review HERE!

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How Your Penis Exercises While You Sleep

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If you want to maintain your penis size and keep it ready to perform, it is important to know how to exercise your penis. While the “love muscle” is not actually a muscle itself, your member contains spongy tissue and chambers that fill with blood to make it harder and larger; so it’s important to exercise it like any other part of the body.

You can exercise your penis by engaging in activities that increase blood flow into it. And the best way to encourage blood flow and preserve penis length is to have regular sex and/or to masturbate more. Simply put, it’s a case of use it or lose it. The more you have sex or masturbate the better shape your penis will be in. Another thing you may not know is that your penis actually exercises itself while you sleep.

Exercising Your Penis in Your Sleep

Your penis actually gets a workout while you sleep. Those middle-of-the-night and early-morning erections have an important function. They are a way for your penis to pump itself up and get some exercise. These erections are called “nocturnal erections,” and they serve several purposes such as promoting oxygenation and blood flow to the penis and helping prevent erectile dysfunction (ED). Plus, from a biological perspective, waking up with your “little friend” ready to go with your partner nearby helps encourage reproduction. Isn’t that convenient?

This “nature’s little helper” is also a natural penis extension therapy, helping to maintain penis size by continuously stretching the penile tissue. When you have an erection, oxygenating blood fills the penis, making it hard. Having good blood flow is an essential component to achieving and maintaining that erection. All healthy men with normal erectile function have multiple erections during their sleep cycle.

As you get older, you may notice that these nocturnal and morning erections are not as strong or as frequent as you had in your younger years. One of the reasons nocturnal erections reduce as you age is because of decreased testosterone, but their absence and other erectile problems could indicate a larger health problem. If you can’t remember the last time you woke up with a hard-on, or if you have experienced erectile dysfunction while awake, talk to your doctor because erectile dysfunction (ED) can be a sign of heart disease.

The downside to having fewer nocturnal erections as you age is that you stop receiving the extension and exercise benefits they provide. That makes it so you have to start working harder in the non-sleeping hours. If you don’t exercise your penis regularly, your penis can actually shrink 1-2 centimeters. Some of the other risks for loss of penis length include weight gain, aging (due to lack of use and declining hormones), genetics, and prostate surgery.

About 70 percent of the men who have their prostate removed can expect to lose some of their penis length. Prostate cancer patients are often unable to achieve an erection for 6-24 months, so doctors sometimes prescribe penis pumps. A penis pump is a tool that keeps the blood flowing in and out, and it helps prevent permanent shrinkage by stretching the penile tissue.

How to Test for Nocturnal Erections

If you are not waking up with erections and are not sure if you still even have nocturnal erections, here’s a simple nocturnal erection test you can do over three nights in the privacy of your own home. Before you laugh, this is actually a real test used by urologists, and it has a name—the nocturnal penile tumescence (NPT) stamp test.

Get a strip of four to six postage stamps (you’ll need a strip for each night). Wrap the strip around the shaft of the penis and moisten to seal the ring. Once the stamp is dry, carefully place your penis into your shorts or underwear to protect the stamps from falling off. In the morning, check to see if the stamps have been broken along their perforation. During at least one of the three nights you should see the ring of stamps broken. If the ring is not broken there may be a physical problem, and you should talk to your doctor.

ED and Heart Disease

If you no longer are getting nocturnal erections or if you have had trouble with your erectile function during the waking hours, talk to your doctor to get your heart checked. A lack of nocturnal erections is one of the signs of ED, and ED is connected with another, scarier ED: early death. So even though exercising your penis is important, you also need to exercise your heart and eat a heart-healthy diet to protect both your heart and your love life.

When Size Matter

If you are concerned about losing your penis length, the best and most enjoyable plan is to use it as much as possible. There are penis-lengthening procedures, but they all have some cautions or drawbacks. One of the interesting penis facts, is that about 50 percent of your penis is actually inside your body courtesy of a suspensory ligament that attaches the penis to your pelvic bone. During surgery, a doctor releases the ligament so that more of the penis can move outside the body. It’s a serious procedure that takes awhile to heal, so you should look into whether gaining that extra inch or so is worth it.

If girth is more your concern than length there are some penile widening procedures as well. You can have a doctor implant silicone, fat, or tissue grafts into your penis. Another procedure that improves girth is to inject hyaluronic acid (a substance found in your body) into the penis. It is said to be painful but effective.

Maintaining a healthy sex life remains the best natural “sex-ercise plan” you can follow (along with exercise, diet, and lifestyle modifications). There are also other great sex exercises for men that can help strengthen muscles and increase stamina and flexibility for better performance. Most men will agree that having sex regularly to maintain penis size sounds much more inviting than cutting or injecting their favorite—and most sensitive—body part unless there is a serious medical reason for it.

Complete Article HERE!

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Japanese macaques grinding on deer can teach us to be more open-minded about sex

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So if macaques do it, dolphins do it, birds and probably even bees do it, why do humans still have so much difficulty talking about sexual pleasure?

by Lux Alptraum

If you grew up in America, there’s a good chance that you learned that sex is, first and foremost, a reproductive act. Sure, it feels good, but that’s just a way for our bodies to trick us into breeding. Many church doctrines will inform you that any sexual experience that doesn’t stand a chance of resulting in pregnancy is sinful, perverse, and unnatural.

But someone might want to tell that to nature.

A recently released study documented multiple instances of adolescent female macaques in Japan having “sexual interactions” with sika deer – or, not to put too fine a point on it, macaques humping the backs of deer like a pre-teen girl with a pillow. Researchers are still trying to figure out why the monkeys are doing this, as NPR explains: “It might be a way for a less-mature monkey to practice for future sex with other monkeys,” or an option for a monkey that doesn’t have any other sexual partners at the moment. It’s also possible that the monkeys, which hitch rides on deer for non-sexual reasons, too, simply discovered by accident that grinding on the deers’ backs felt good.

The discovery has prompted a lot of marveling from the media. But if you’re surprised to learn that animals like to pleasure themselves, you’re not paying attention. There are numerous documented instances of animal masturbation, a habit enjoyed by primates as well as creatures including dolphins, elephants, penguins, and bats. (Although the role of the sika deer adds a layer of complexity: Can a deer consent to interspecies frottage? “Most deer were nonchalant, continuing to eat or stand passively during the thrusting,” Quartz observes.)

It’s impossible for us to know exactly what the deer think about all this. That matter aside, there are a lot of animals out there who are, if you will, spanking the monkey. So if macaques do it, dolphins do it, birds and probably even bees do it, why do humans still have so much difficulty talking about sexual pleasure?

Even those of us who’ve gotten past the idea that sex outside the bonds of heterosexual marriage is a one-way ticket to hell still have difficulty talking about pleasure. Sex education curricula rarely venture beyond discussions of condoms, birth control, and puberty (if they even cover condoms and birth control); for many of us, the idea of discussing masturbation seems particularly prurient and unseemly. It’s been twenty-three years since Jocelyn Elders was forced to resign from the post of surgeon general in the US after daring to suggest that young people be taught to think of masturbation as a form of safer sex. And in spite of all the progress we’ve made since the early 1990s, it’s still hard to imagine a government official coming out in favor of masturbation. (Not that I necessarily want to hear a member of the Trump Administration talking about double-clicking the mouse.)

Our reticence on the subject of masturbation is particularly damaging for women. Copious amounts of ink have been spilled about the gender orgasm gap, with lots of hand-wringing about how straight men are letting their female partners down in bed. But it’s not just straight male selfishness that fuels the orgasm gap. One of the main reasons why women are less likely to find pleasure in bed is that we rarely discuss the tools to access our own pleasure, or even an understanding that pleasure can, and should, be a primary goal in our sex lives.

When sexual pleasure is discussed, it’s almost always from a straight male perspective, rationalized as an added bit of biological incentive intended to encourage men to spread their seed. As Peggy Orenstein writes in her recent book Girls & Sex, American culture teaches girls that men pursue sex and pleasure, while women passively provide it. “When girls go into puberty education classes, they learn that boys have erections and ejaculations and girls have periods and unwanted pregnancies,” Orenstein told Quartz in 2016. And when women do experience orgasms, it’s frequently positioned as the result of a partner’s skill, rather than something we’re naturally wired to actively pursue, all by ourselves, for our own selfish reasons.

These macaques throw all of these assumptions into disarray. Not only are they animals getting off just for fun, they’re female animals going to unusual lengths in pursuit of their own sexual pleasure. What we should take away from this is that sexual pleasure isn’t an also-ran to reproduction; it’s an essential part of many animals’ life experiences—regardless of our species, sex, or gender.

So instead of getting Puritanical on the macaques, let’s use them as a jumping-off point for discussions about just how natural it is to pursue sexual pleasure. Whether we’re monkeys or men—or women!—we’re all wired to seek out sensations that feel good.

Complete Article HERE!

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How sex with a small penis can actually give you more pleasure – and how to tell your partner you have one

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Only a small number of men have a micropenis, and it’s not necessarily bad news for their sex life

By Zahra Mulroy

Penis size is the butt of many a joke, and, wrongly, nothing will elicit a titter more than the mention of a micropenis

With 0.6 per cent of the male population affected, they remain comparatively uncommon, but the physical and psychological repercussions can be serious and the cause of much anguish.

There’s undeniably a stigma attached: “Size matters” , you’re less of a man if you have one, your partner will get no enjoyment out of sex with you – the list goes on.

But having a micropenis isn’t necessarily the dire news it’s assumed to be – at least, according to sex therapist Elizabeth McGrath .

McGrath counsels clients with micropenises, and their partners.

She helps them get the most out of their sex lives and will talk them through “clothed, non-genital touch” the Daily Dot reports.

“I really practice this work and I believe in it, primarily because sex is of our bodies,” McGrath said. “When it comes to sex and relationships, I believe there’s only so much talking can do.

“So much of what keeps people down, makes them feel awful, are these ideas about what good sex is, and it’s a box, a very, very small box,” McGrath adds.

“For somebody with a micropenis or their partner, not fitting in that box is very painful.”

So what does McGrath advise?

“There’s humping, there’s grinding, there’s rubbing the penis on the labia or on the side, and then it expands into ‘What kind of fun things can we do together?'” she explains.

“Look at it as an opportunity to find new things rather than focus on one way of doing it specifically.”

McGrath also goes on to recommend oral sex becomes the “main event” and suggests that toys be used too.

“I think any augmenting toys can be fun. But more importantly, is it comfortable and does it feel good? Are you doing it because you enjoy it or is it because you feel like it makes you more normal?”

As for breaking the ice with a new partner and being honest about having a micropenis, McGrath says a man shouldn’t stress about this, as it only reinforces the idea that it’s something to be ashamed of.

Complete Article HERE!

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