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Foreskin freak outs!

Hey sex fans,

I know what you’re thinkin’: Hey Dr Dick, what’s up with your podcasts? Well I’ll tell ya. It’s true I haven’t posted a podcast in two weeks. But there’s a good reason. I’ve been busy, damnit! I have a new book coming out in a matter of days and all my energies have been focused in that direction. Gettin’ a book published is like birthin’ babies, don’t cha know.

That being said, I have put together a fantastic line up of guests for my show that will delight and amaze you. And my stellar guest list will take us into the fall. So stay tuned; podcasts will resume next week, Monday, 07/15/13.

To tide you over till then, I have some interesting Q&A from all over the freakin world.

Jerome and Conor, an American and an Englishman. each present a similar problem.

Name: Jerome
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Location: CA
Dr Dick, I have an uncut penis and when I’m in the shower and my foreskin is pulled back, the head of my dick hurts pretty bad from the falling water. The shower is not heavily pressurized, but it still hurts. Any answers?

AND

Name: Conor
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Location: London
My helmet is really sensitive I think it is because it is never really exposed because it is always behind my foreskin. How do I make it become less sensitive? Thanks

You boys have got your work cut out for you with the whole desensitizing thing, don’t cha know. Ya see, the more bodyasart5420you expose your sensitive dickhead to direct stimulation, be it touch or whatever, the less sensitive it will become.

I realize this isn’t gonna be all that pleasurable, at least not in the short-run, but you will find that in a matter of days this hypersensitivity will begin to reverse itself and pleasure will replace discomfort. Jerome, you have the right idea with the shower thing. However, you might want to try buffering your dickhead with a thin piece of fabric, like a handkerchief, at first. Once you can tolerate that level of sensation, remove the cloth and let the shower flow hit you dickhead directly. Make sure you do this daily for as long as you can stand it. Like I said, this will help desensitize your dickhead in a matter of days.

Once you’re out of the shower apply some nice lotion to your cockhead. This will diminish some the sensitivity. It will also help your fingers move easily on and around it.

Make sure that you fully retract your foreskin each time you jerk off. Every time you come in contact with your glans you will be desensitizing it. Patience and perseverance are the keys to making this happen in a relatively short period of time. If you are conscientious about this you will notice a difference in sensitivity in just a matter of days. Remember, it’ll be a no pain/no gain sorta thing, at least at the beginning.

To assist you in this process, you might consider trying a desensitizing lotion or cream to reduce some of the hypersensitivity. Some of these products are sold as a means of increasing ejaculatory control. But they also work for problem sensitivity too. Ya see these lotions and creams will have a “numbing effect” on your cock. If you choose to use one of these products, use it sparingly and only for a limited time.

If you check out MY STOCKROOM you will find several such products. Look for Boy Butter Extreme. It’s a desensitizing water-based lube, which contains 7.5% benzocaine; a strong local anesthetic, the maximum amount allowed by law.

Or look for Analyse Me! Anal Comfort Spray. Obviously, this is a product developed to desensitize your butt hole before fucking. But again, this will work on your dickhead as well. This product is lidocaine and benzocaine free.

Good luck you guys

A_Foreskin_Retraction_Series

Name: Saukha
Gender: Male
Age: 27
Location: India
Hi Doc, My problem is a stiff / tight frenulum. For past few months whenever I make love with my wife, it hurts, feels like something slightly rips, after applying anti-fungal ointments it gets ok but when we do it again it reoccurs and hurts when I wash my penis with plain water. IS there any ointment or cream, which would help frenulum to get more stretchable? Or is circumcision the only answer to my problem as we are planning for a family and don’t wanna go under the knife (if something goes wrong), just a bit scared for it. Please help and guide. Thanks a lot in advance.

Why are you using an anti-fungal ointment? Do you have some kind of a skin condition that requires you to use a use an anti-fungal treatment under your foreskin? If you don’t, you are probably adding to your problems by using this stuff. An anti-fungal ointment will dry out your skin, particularly under your foreskin. And that sounds like your problem right there.

Are you using a nice personal lube when you fuck? If not, that’s what you need to introduce into your lovemaking. This will not just be for you, of course. It’ll also for you lovely wife. A nice silicone-based or water-based lube will work wonders on your dick and it will assist in your wife’s comfort too. Please, give it a try.

There’s no reason you should have to consider circumcision. But the proper care and upkeep of your foreskin is essential to a properly functioning natural cock. I’ve written and spoken extensively about this. Go to the CATEGORIES section in the sidebar and look under the heading Body Issues for the subcategory — Foreskin. There’s loads of information there.

You probably saw the comments I made to the two guys right above, right? A desensitizing cream or lotion might help you too. But whatever you do, stop drying out the delicate tissue under your foreskin.

Good luck

Worry, Worry, Worry!

Today I present a handful of concerns from the sexually worrisome.

Name: Michael
Gender: Male
Age:
Location:
How does one prepare a solution to be used for a male anal douche?

Warm water is all you need. Never use soap.body as art11

Some men add lemon juice or vinegar (1-2 Tbs per quart) of the warm water. Others dissolve (2 Tbs) of baking soda in a quart of warm water.

Stay away from commercially produced douches, most contain harmful and irritating chemicals. And trust me, you don’t want that. Besides, commercial douches are expensive and all that packaging is definitely not eco-friendly. And we all want to be green perverts, don’t we?

Finally I’d like to turn you on to the Ergo Speed Douche. Brad, of the Dr Dick Review Crew, gave it a stunning review. Check it out. You can find it, and all the products we’ve reviewed, on drdicksextoyreviews.com.

Good luck

Name: Angela
Gender: Female
Age: 14
Location:
Hi! Um how do you know whether you should be a sub or a dom? And is there a contract for a sub/dom relationship? Thank you, and bye!

Whoa, hun, there are no “shoulds” when it comes to power exchange play.

With a little more life experience under your belt, the kind that will come over the next few years, you will no doubt discover on your own whether you have tendencies for either one or the other of these roles.  I assure you that it will reveal itself to you in time.

Yes, often there is a contract of sorts that organically forms between a sub and his/her Dom. The details of which are always determined by the uniqueness of the relationship. So no need to get too far ahead of yourself in this regard either.

Hey, why don’t ya do yourself a favor and allow yourself the time you need to let your life unfold in a natural sorta way? I mean, where’s the fire? Besides, this is not something you can force or artificially accelerate.

Good luck

Name:
Gender: Male
Age: 22
Location: New York
Is there any cream out there that really works to promote better blood flow to my penis? I believe from over masturbating I have lost some of my hardness during sex. If not is there any thing I can take over the counter herb, vitamins, whatever that may contain certain things that can help. What is the best solution for me.

dick around on the internetHold on there, fella! You’re only a tender 22 years of age and yet you say you’ve already lost some of your “hardness” to excessive masturbation? How is this possible? How many times a day are you pullin’ your pud, darlin’? Is there something else goin on that you’re not telling me?  If not, maybe you could give your peanut a little break.  Sheesh!

To start with, penis enlargement pills and patches proliferate on internet, but there is virtually no documented evidence that they work. All such products use herbal ingredients, like ginkgo biloba and yohimbe, which act as stimulants and vasodilators. The best one can say is that some pills may enhance blood flow, which may, in some cases, cause an ever so slight increase in wood. However, once you start a program like this, you need to continue it for as long as you want the effects to last. Imagine how expensive that would be; these products are pretty pricy.

Regarding the “hardness” issue you mention. Perhaps that’s best handled by a simple cockring. Here’s a tip: always look for the low-tech solution to a problem first.

Good luck

The Erotic Mind of Renee Glover — Podcast #380 — 06/17/13


Hey sex fans, welcome back.IMG_2706

The Erotic Mind series continues today, but we will be shifting gears…a lot! For the last two weeks we chatted with the delectable Erika Moen, a visual erotic artist from the Pacific Northwest. Today, we welcome a literary artist from down under.

I have the distinct pleasure of welcoming the incomparable, Renee Glover, and her alter ego, MisKnickers. Renee is an author, activist, and performer and she is here to tell us why she’s knockin’ around the good old US of A this summer. Hey wait a minute; where’s Homeland Security when we need it?

Renee  will read a spicy little snippet from her work. I hear it involves kissing and geography! I know; it must be an Australian thing.

Renee  and I discuss:

  • (f)Risky Enterprises;
  • Her take on the current state of erotica;
  • Social commentary;
  • General philosophizing;
  • The power of words;
  • Writing love letters for her clients;
  • WoRDPLaY workshops;
  • The necessity of editing and proofreading.

Renee invites you to visit her on her website HERE! And look for her on Facebook HERE! And Twitter HERE!

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for all my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: LibidoStack.

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A Little Sex History

Happy Gay Pride Month!

It’s time, once again, to post my annual pride posting.

In my lifetime I’ve witnessed a most remarkable change in societal attitudes toward those of us on the sexual fringe. One only needs to go back 50 years in time. I was 13 years old then and  I knew I was queer.  When I looked out on the world around me this is what I saw. Homosexuality was deemed a mental disorder by the nation’s psychiatric authorities, and gay sex was a crime in every state but Illinois. Federal workers could be fired merely for being gay.

Today, gays serve openly in the military, work as TV news anchors and federal judges, win elections as big-city mayors and members of Congress. Popular TV shows have gay protagonists.

And now the gay-rights movement may be on the cusp of momentous legal breakthroughs. Later this month, a Supreme Court ruling could lead to legalization of same-sex marriage in California, and there’s a good chance the court will require the federal government to recognize same-sex marriages in all U.S. jurisdictions where they are legal — as of now, 12 states and Washington, D.C.

The transition over five decades has been far from smooth — replete with bitter protests, anti-gay violence, backlashes that inflicted many political setbacks. Unlike the civil rights movement and the women’s liberation movement, the campaign for gay rights unfolded without household-name leaders.

And yet, I sense that soon, if it hasn’t begun already, we will experience a backlash in the dominant culture. I don’t relish the idea, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention it. And when it comes, as I think it will, it won’t smart nearly as much if we know our history. And we should also remember the immortal words of Martin Luther King, Jr. “The moral arc of the universe bends at the elbow of justice.”

In honor of gay pride month, a little sex history lesson — The Stonewall Riots

The confrontations between demonstrators and police at The Stonewall Inn, a mafia owned bar in Greenwich Village NYC over the weekend of June 27-29, 1969 are usually cited as the beginning of the modern Lesbian/Gay liberation Movement. What might have been just another routine police raid onstonewall.jpg a bar patronized by homosexuals became the pivotal event that sparked the entire modern gay rights movement.

The Stonewall riots are now the stuff of myth. Many of the most commonly held beliefs are probably untrue. But here’s what we know for sure.

  • In 1969, it was illegal to operate any business catering to homosexuals in New York City — as it still is today in many places in the world. The standard procedure was for New York City’s finest to raid these establishments on a regular basis. They’d arrest a few of the most obvious ‘types’ harass the others and shake down the owners for money, then they’d let the bar open as usual by the next day.
  • Myth has it that the majority of the patrons at the Stonewall Inn were black and Hispanic drag queens. Actually, most of the patrons were probably young, college-age white guys lookin for a thrill and an evening out of the closet, along with the usual cadre of drag queens and hustlers. It was reasonably safe to socialize at the Stonewall Inn for them, because when it was raided the drag queens and bull-dykes were far more likely to be arrested then they were.
  • After midnight June 27-28, 1969, the New York Tactical Police Force called a raid on The Stonewall Inn at 55 Christopher Street in NYC. Many of the patrons who escaped the raid stood around to witness the police herding the “usual suspects” into the waiting paddywagons. There had recently been several scuffles where similar groups of people resisted arrest in both Los Angeles and New York.
  • Stonewall was unique because it was the first time gay people, as a group, realized that what threatened drag queens and bull-dykes threatened them all.
  • Many of the onlookers who took on the police that night weren’t even homosexual. Greenwich Village was home to many left-leaning young people who had cut their political teeth in the civil rights, anti-war and women’s lib movements.
  • As people tied to stop the arrests, the mêlée erupted. The police barricaded themselves inside the bar. The crowd outside attempted to burn it down. Eventually, police reinforcements arrived to disperse the crowd. But this just shattered the protesters into smaller groups that continued to mill around the streets of the village.
  • A larger crowd assembled outside the Stonewall the following night. This time young gay men and women came to protest the raids that were commonplace in the city. They held hands, kissed and formed a mock chorus line singing; “We are the Stonewall Girls/We wear our hair in curls/We have no underwear/We show our pubic hair.” Don’t ‘cha just love it?
  • Police successfully dispersed this group without incident. But the print media picked up the story. Articles appeared in the NY Post, Daily News and The Village Voice. Theses helped galvanize the community to rally and fight back.
  • Within a few days, representatives of the Mattachine Society and the Daughters of Bilitis (two of the country’s first homophile rights groups) organized the city’s first ever “Gay Power” rally in Washington Square. Some give hundred protesters showed up; many of them gay and lesbians.

stonewall02.jpgThe riots led to calls for homosexual liberation. Fliers appeared with the message: “Do you think homosexuals are revolting? You bet your sweet ass we are!” And the rest, boys and girls, is as they say is history.

During the first year after Stonewall, a whole new generation of organizations emerged, many identifying themselves for the first time as “Gay.” This not only denoted sexual orientation, but a radical way to self-identify with a growing sense of open political activism. Older, more staid homophile groups soon began to make way for the more militant groups like the Gay Liberation Front.

The vast majority of these new activists were under thirty; dr dick’s generation, don’t cha know. We were new to political organizing and didn’t know that this was as ground-breaking as it was. Many groups formed on colleges campuses and in big cities around the world.

By the following summer, 1970, groups in at least eight American cities staged simultaneous events commemorating the Stonewall riots on the last Sunday in June. The events varied from a highly political march of three to five thousand in New York to a parade with floats for 1200 in Los Angeles. Seven thousand showed up in San Francisco.

Sit and Stay…Longer

Podcasting will resume next week Monday with a swell Q&A Show. Today, however, I want to pay tribute to my long-time companion, Ginger The Dog, who died last Friday, one month shy of her 14th birthday. She was so much a part of my life that she often appeared in my posting and provided sound effects in numerous podcasts. Here’s one such posting, re-posted from January 2005. This particular column remains one of my most popular postings ever.

 

 

Anyone the least bit familiar with Dr Dick’s wacky household will know all about Ginger. For the uninitiated, Ginger is a 5 year old German Shorthair Pointer, who believes she’s the center of the universe and who daily runs the good doctor into the ground.24604.jpg Ginger is special. She’s no one’s pet — least of all mine.

She doesn’t even think of herself as a dog — except when she forgets herself and takes off after a squirrel or a rabbit. And she makes a point of reminding me, several times a day, that she doesn’t “belong” to me. Rather, it is I who have the great privilege to share a domicile with her. I tell you all of this by way of introducing today’s topic. No, it’s not bestiality, ferchrisake! It’s behavior modification and sexual response. Ya know — learning how to last longer.

Here we’ll discuss the remedy for that pesky premature ejaculation problem everyone is talking about. Ginger was a year and a half old when she moved in and took over the joint. She had been abandoned and was, for all intents and purposes, completely feral when she arrived. Once here, Dr Dick tried to imprint a more civilized behavior pattern on his new housemate using several tried and true dog-training methods. Which, for all intents and purposes, are simply behavior modification techniques for doggies.

Successful behavior modification is dependent on the consistency of the stimulus. Consistent stimuli — a command and a treat — are supposed to create the desired response —sitting and staying. Sadly, this approach wasn’t overly successful for Ginger and me. In fact, about the only one who got trained/modified was Dr Dick. Ginger remains blissfully resistant to all efforts to civilize her.

The following correspondents, we hope, will succeed in modifying their sexual response with greater ease than my attempts to train Ginger The Dog. What differentiates them from the dog is that each of my correspondents has the motivation to change. Ginger, on the other hand, has no such motivation. She thinks she’s perfect just the way she is.

Hey Doc,I have a major problem that I hope I could get some advice from you. It’s about my sexual issue. Whenever I’m having sex, I can’t control my nerves. It means I can’t relax. And I come too fast and rapidly. I can’t have foreplay or enjoy sex. Do you know any medications or anything that would help me to prevent this? I guess my problem is what people called “premature ejaculation”. I can ejaculate rapidly, at first I thought it was really good. But later I figured out that wasn’t good. And that it’s a sickness. Please help me. Hope to hear from you soon.Thanks Dylan

Hey Dylan,Your premature ejaculation concern is not a sickness. In fact, it’s a very common complaint. Learning to last longer is a relatively easy thing to accomplish if that’s really what you want. Motivation is key.Let’s start with how you jack-off. If I had to guess these little sessions are speedy affairs, right? Quick jack-off sessions, just to relieve sexual tension can be a good thing, but they are also modifying your sexual response and interfering with your partnered pleasure.

Premature_Ejaculation_ManIf your body is being sensitized to cuming quickly, like while jerkin’-off, then that’s how it will respond later, when you are at play with a partner.I suggest that you take a different approach to your self-pleasuring activity. Some, if not all, of your masturbation should be dedicated to full body masturbation. That is, while you’re diddlin’ yourself with the one hand, your other hand is busy exploring the rest of your body. The object is to play with the sex tension and move it around. Some people call this edge play or edging.

The object here is to avoid an ejaculation. Move the sexual energy all over your body, touch and pleasure your whole body while stroking you cock. A nice massage lotion will add to the enjoyment. Make this time last as long as you can. As you approach the point of ejaculation, stop stroking your dick and continue to play with another part of your body, your tits, ass hole, prostate, feet, etc. When the urge to cum subsides, you can start to stroke your dick again. Practice this method over and over until you can last 30 minutes.

Successful behavior modification is dependent on the consistency of the stimulus.5431362.jpg Consistent stimuli — full body masturbation — will create the desired response — lasting longer.You are teaching your body a new way to respond to sexual stimulation. This will no doubt also increase your stamina when you’re with a partner. When you’re having sex with a partner do the same thing as when you are masturbating. Encourage your partner to spread the sexual energy around. Discourage her/him from concentrating on your dick. Work at stalling your orgasm. If you’re getting close to cuming, have him/her turn his/her attention to another pleasurable activity.

Don’t get frustrated if you can’tt regain control over your sexual response right away. This is gonna take some practice, but I think it’s worth the effort. Once you mastered this technique, there are other more advanced methods that I can tell you about later.Good luck.

Hi Richard,

My question is in two parts. 1. How can I orgasm more quickly? 2. How can I orgasm easily when someone else is doing the stimulation?I know this question might sounds strange because many guys are trying to not cum too quickly.Here’s some background; over the years, I have gotten very in-touch with my physical sexual side. I have learned control the build up to orgasm and my orgasm. Having this control is amazing for the most part — it allows long periods of edge play, which I really enjoy.

However, the disadvantage is that I can’t easily orgasm quickly and usually can’t orgasm at all when someone else is doing the stimulation. These two limitations haven’t been a big concern until recently. My orgasm isn’t necessarily the most important part of sex for me. Unfortunately, many times my limitations are disappointing to a sex partner. He wants to see me cum and/or wants to make me cum. Both of these desires are totally understandable — I really enjoy doing the same for him.Is it possible for me to “learn” to cum more quickly and is it possible to “learn” how to cum from the stimulation of someone other than myself? Any suggestions or advice would be greatly appreciated!!

Jim

Hey Jim,

What an interesting predicament you present. As you suggest, I’m forever hearing from guys who have the opposite problem as you. They what to prolong their sex play before 180402.jpgcoming. Your message to me proves my point to them; our sexual response is altered, for good or for worse, by how we stimulate ourselves.Curious enough, the answer to your query resides in the detail you present about your particular sexual practices. Clearly, you have conditioned your body, and thus your sexual response cycle, to last a very long time, perhaps too long. I guess that’s the downside of long periods of edge play.

How does one remedy this? Gosh, you’ve conditioned yourself so successfully; there may be little you can do to reverse this.

Orgasms, as you know, are not things we can will to happen or not to happen. However, you could try to find a stroke or a type of stimulation that you could use to successfully bring yourself to climax. Concentrate on that stroke with the intention of getting yourself off ASAP. You would then have to show your partner(s) this technique if you wanted them to get you off. Just a thought, does ass play and prostate massage speed up your orgasm? It does for lots of other men. So if you’re not already doing so, perhaps you could incorporate some…or more of this.

What you’re gonna want to do here is reverse some of the conditioning you’ve done and relearn a new sexual practice or response. It can be done. Will it take determination? You betcha!

Good luck