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The Next Big Thing

Name: Ned
Gender: male
Age: 38
Location: Richmond VA
I have recently been exploring my bi side and experimenting with other men. I’m perfectly comfortable with my sexuality: I’m attracted to both women and men, but I’m predominantly attracted to women. I hate having to hide my bisexuality. I’d like to come out as bi, but I fear that most bi men are considered gay by default. Aren’t most women freaked out when they learn a guy is bi? So what do you think? Is there any hope for being out and BISEXUAL-not-gay? How can I meet women who aren’t bi-phobic?

Hold on there big fella, are you really trying to convince me that you’re “perfectly comfortable” with your sexuality? Because if you are, you’ve a long way to go, darlin’. I ain’t buyin’ that no how. Like I always say; if you have to go out of your way to tell someone that your are perfectly comfortable, you’re probably not.

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I think you think you are “perfectly comfortable” with your sexuality, but frankly you’re fooling only yourself. Your vocabulary gives you away. You may be experimenting with other men; and don’t get me wrong, I think that’s a good thing. But bumping the occasional dude, without letting that exercise impact on your internalized homophobia, don’t make you bi.

Want to meet woman who aren’t bi-phobic? Then look to bisexual woman.

I’m forever hearing from bi guys, like you, Ned, who moan and groan about not being taken seriously by gay men or straight women. It never seems to occur to these “bi” guys that they can avoid all clueless gay men and straight women by simply dating bi women and men exclusively. What kind of statement does it make about the general desirability of bisexuals when so many bisexuals can’t conceive of dating other bisexuals?
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Did you know that there’s research on the sexual arousal patterns among men — gay, bi and straight? You might be interested to know that the researchers couldn’t find a specific, identifiable “male bisexual arousal pattern.” Most of the men who self-identified as bisexual had arousal patterns exactly like that of gay men. 75 percent of the bi guys only got aroused watching male on male sex; the other 25 percent of the bi guys only got aroused watching girl on girl sex. No one responded equally to images of men and women.

So what does that tell us, if anything?

I think we all know that some ostensibly gay men claim to be bisexual for a time while they acclimatize themselves to their true queer identity. But why was the sexual arousal research not turning up a distinctive male bisexual arousal pattern? I conclude, given my own clinical experience, that real male bisexuality is far more rare than female bisexuality.

I think there are a lot of guys out there having bisexual experiences — probably more now than ever, which like I said earlier is a good thing. But one’s sexual orientation is not the same thing as one’s sexual capacity.

A lot of guys like you, Ned, are predominantly straight guys who, on occasion, play with otherbisex_toon.jpg guys. But that don’t make you, or them, bi. Authentic bisexual men are emotionally available to other men as well as women. You, Ned, are capable of having sex with other guys, but you’re only emotionally available for nesting with women. Most gay guys have already figured this out about most so called bi men. They discriminate against most “bi men”, because there’s little to no chance of having a full-fledged relationship with these guys.

And straight women discriminate against most so called bi men, because they’ve learned to mistrust the so called “bi male” identity. They know that the frequency with which these “bi males” turn into gay males is staggering.

So in the end, Ned, you might want to reconsider your self-identification. Why not just say you’re an ostensibly straight guy that likes, on occasion, to mess around with other dudes. It appears that would solve all your problems as well as your conflicts with gay men and straight women.

Name: Doreen
Gender: female
Age: 30
Location: Memphis
I think I have a spanking fetish. I say I think I do, because I never tried it. But I want to. I think my partner would be up for it, but I have yet to ask her. I thought I’d ask you first. What are your thoughts about spanking?

If you’ve been a bad girl, Doreen, then I think you definitely need a spanking. Have you been naughty, Doreen? Precisely how naughty have you been, Doreen? Everyone here at Dr Dick’s wants to know!

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Spanking is a very popular fetish, one that can be enjoyed with or without sex. At the same time, spanking can be risky if you entrust the task to someone who doesn’t know what she or he is doing. Of course, it’s not particularly difficult to learn the basics. So just for you, wayward Doreen, I’m gonna offer a brief sexual enrichment tutorial on erotic spanking. YEAH!

Most spankers start with a hand or a paddle of some sort. Spanking is different from whipping and flogging, which are much more advanced techniques than your garden-variety spanking. We’ll leave these techniques for another time.

There are two musts in this kind of power play: 1) The spanker must always inquire about the health of the spankee before the play begins. 2) Both participants must always agree on a safeword before the play begins. A safeword is a codeword that the spankee will use as she is reaching a physical, emotional or moral boundary, or for when she wants the spanker to stop the play.

The safeword will be a word that the spankee would not ordinarily use during the play, like “pickles.” This extraordinary word allows the spankee to scream “no, stop”, “please, don’t” etc. as much as she/he wants without it stopping the play.

If you actually get around to enticing your partner to join you for a little spanking entertainment, make sure the first adventure is fun for all. I suggest that the spanking be part of a role-play scenario that you and your GF develop together. Your partner may need lots of positive reinforcement, particularly if she reluctant to join you in your kink. Keep telling her how much fun you’ll both have in the role-play. For example, you could be the naughty schoolgirl and your partner could be the stern teacher. Really get into your roles; you’ll both need to dress the part, of course. You — sexy short pleated Catholic schoolgirl skirt, anklets and trashy high-heels. She — the domineering dyke teacher in a drab, no-nonsense grey suit and sensible shoes. Get the picture?chick_spank2.jpg

The teacher calls you into her office for a corrective interview. She needs to teach you a lesson. She puts you over her knee. She’ll do lots of bottom rubbing first, while she’s lecturing you on your bad behavior. As she gets into it, you know she’ll be getting turned on too. “It will be a shame to spank this beautiful bottom of yours,” she’ll coo. “This is going to hurt me as much as it hurts you!”…sort of deal. She’ll finger your pretty panties, but won’t remove them. She’ll start spanking very gently at first. Light taps on the fleshy part of your ass cheeks. If you want more, start wiggling into the spanking. Remember to stay in character. “No, Miss. Diesel, that hurts, please don’t touch me there! Grind into her lap. Your body language will communicate your desire for her to continue and possibly intensify the spanking.

To insure the comfort of your partner, set some ground rules for your first play session. Don’t’ do bare-bottom spanking until she indicates her willingness to go there. If your partner is a feminist dyke, this whole spanking thing may go against the grain for her. Remind her this is fantasy role playing; not real life.

The more you get into your roles, the more likely she’ll get into her roles — Catholic schoolgirl/Sr. Mary Holywater, slutty patient/naughty nurse — you get the idea. The more you please her, the better she’ll please you.

Be sure to reward your partner for her participation. After the first session take her to dinner. Ask her for her for her reactions. What could you have done to make the scenario more pleasurable for her? Talk about your reactions. Tell her how much you appreciated her participation. Talk about the scenario and how well she did. Tell her what you liked most about the spanking itself. If you sense that she’s content with events thus far, you could plan for more.

Set aside a couple of role play evenings in the coming weeks. If she continues to be open and receptive, you can add more and more spanking, different implements, a ruler, a hairbrush, a paddle. If you want spankings on other parts of your body, tits, pussy and the like introduce those slowly. The intensity of the spanking needs to be adjusted to more sensitive parts of the anatomy. Make sure there’s lots of feedback happening before and after each play session.

Spanking is a full-fledged fetish with loads of spanking associated erotica. It goes from mild to wild. Do some exploring together your GF. Check out some magazines or videos. You’d probably do well to stick to the girl-on-girl stuff at first. Some, if not all, of the boy-on-girl stuff may be offensive to your partner’s lesbiterian sensibilities. Remember to also attend to your partner’s fantasies and the things that turn her on too.

Like I said at the beginning, spanking is a stand-alone fetish, it may be a part of full-on sex, or it may be just a bonding thing between you two naughty bitches.

In the end, introducing your partner to your kink is one of those — “Give To Get” things. Be attentive to her, make sure she knows she’s the most special person in your life. The more satisfied she is; the more she’ll be open to pleasing you.

Name: Roy
Gender: Male
Age: 25
Location: Germany
sir, I’m started masturbating for 11yrs, Sometimes I’ll masturbate twice a day I cant stop this habit. Will it ill affect me in future?

Well Roy, I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Even beatin’ off twice a day will not harm you . On the contrary, researchers are now saying that regular masturbation may ward off prostate cancer. They tell us that cancer-causing chemicals build up in the prostate, and if men do not ejaculate regularly the build-up can cause problems.masturbate.jpg

Don’t you just love this? I mean, how does one write a grant for government funding to study the positive effects of self-abuse?

Curiously, researchers also note that sexual intercourse may not have the same protective effect because of the possibility of contracting a sexually transmitted infection, which could increase men’s cancer risk.

Say, I wonder if all of those “Abstinence only” programs out there encourage masturbation? Doubt it.

Anyhow, Australian researchers studied over 1,000 men who had developed prostate cancer and 1,250 men who had not.  They asked about their sexual habits. They found those who had ejaculated the most between the ages of 20 and 50 were the least likely to develop prostate cancer.

The protective effect was greatest while the men were in their 20s.  Get this, men who ejaculated more than five times a week were a third less likely to develop prostate cancer later in life.

jerkoff001.jpgPreviously the scientific wisdom suggested that a high level of sexual activity and a high number of sexual partners actually increased a man’s risk of developing prostate cancer. But earlier studies missed the beneficial effects of squeezing one out on one’s own, because they focused on sexual intercourse, with its associated risk of STIs (sexually transmitted infections).

Say, I wonder if anyone is doing similar research on the positive effects of masturbation for women? If I had to guess, I’d say that, if jackin’ off is good for men, then it stands to reason that jillin’ off is equally good for women.

Researchers tell us that ejaculating prevents the buildup of carcinogens in the prostate gland. It’s the “prostatic stagnation hypothesis.” How fun is that? You certainly don’t want a stagnant prostate now, do ya? I know I don’t. The more you flush out your ducts, the fewer carcinogens there will be to hang around and damage the cells that line your ducts.”

This is not a terribly new concept. A similar connection has been found between breast cancer and breastfeeding. Lactating flushes out carcinogens, thus reducing a woman’s risk of breast cancer.

Everyone here are Dr Dick’s Sex Advice believes that masturbation should be a big part of everyone’s sexual repertoire. And we always practice what we preach! We wholehearted encourage everybody to join us and masturbate till your heart’s content.

Good luck ya’ll

Loose Change

Name: Tia
Gender: Female
Age: 19
I have a problem. I’m still a virgin, but my bf thinks I’m not. It’s really my fault he thinks this, cuz I told him I was all experienced and everything. We’ve been going together for about 8 months already and I really want my first time to be with him, but how am I going to act all experienced when I don’t know what I’m doing.
HELP ME PLEASE!!!

That sure enough is a pickle you got yourself into darlin’. You’ve got some ‘splanin’ to do Lucy!

Funny, because I’m more likely to hear from young women who are not virgins, but who want to know how they can fool a new partner into thinking they are. I guess we can chalk up all this deception and confusion to the powerful associations every culture imposes on virginity…female virginity, that is.

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Like most things sexual there is a huge double standard between the cultural and individual importance of virginity for women as opposed to men. Cultural expectations about virginity are also tied to age as well as gender. For example, our society expects its 16-year-old girls to be virgins. To be otherwise, at that tender age, would be a scandal in most communities. (Jamie Lynn Spears comes immediately to mind.) But a 35 year old woman who is still a virgin is considered an old maid — or worse, a dyke.

Of course, things are more fluid when it comes to boys and men. On the one hand, a 16year old boy who is not a virgin may raise some eyebrows in some communities. But many others in those same communities would praise him for being a stud. On the other hand, a 35 year old man who is still a virgin is the butt of jokes — or worse, a queer. In fact, he’s also more of a disgrace to his gender than an old maid is to hers. Funny how that works, huh?

I hasten to add that there is a lot to argue with in terms of these arbitrary cultural norms, and I encourage ya’ll to argue away. God knows I do! And you don’t have to buy into them either. God knows I don’t! But till things change, these norms are the norms, like it or lump it.

I’d love to know why you felt the need to deceive your BF in the first place? Do the people you hang with, prize sexual experience over sexual innocence for a young woman of 19? And what are the expectations of your group regarding a 19 year old guy? I’ll bet the expectation is that he not be a virgin. Right?

Well you can see why a lot of people, not just you Tia, find this whole thing just too damned complicated. And rather than add to the confusion or the deception, I encourage you to come clean with the BF about your cherry.

Here’s why I think this is the best policy. First, if the BF is sexually experienced, it will be very difficult for you to hide the fact that you’re not. Besides, like you said in your message to me. “I really want my first time to be with him.” Why not just come out and tell him that, sweetheart? No man is gonna turn that down…ever. Simply put, that is the most sexually charged and treasured sentence in any language.

Begin the big talk with your man like this. “Baby, I got something real special to tell you. You know how I’ve been sayin that I’ve been with other guys and everything? Well that was just my way of keeping all the other guys from pestering me for my junk. Baby, the truth is that I haven’t had sex before now. And the best part of this is I’ve decided that I really want my first time to be with you. My cherry belongs to you, baby”

Like I said, Tia, no man is gonna turn that down. The BF will be so flattered you won’t have to pretend to be something you’re not. Clearing the air like this will also allow you to relax when the magic moment finally happens. And relaxation is the key to enjoying yourself. And you should enjoy yourself.

Name: Mikel
Gender: Male
Age: 25
Location: Seattle
My problem is: I have a fixation on cut dicks, so when I’m having sex with uncut people, I can’t enjoy it. I feel it’s dirty!!! Should I ask my partners their “shape” before having sex? Wouldn’t I sound like a whore?

What a curious concern you have. I mean, not the cut/uncut thing…that I understand. Lots of people have a preference for either natural or snipped meat, so I’m cool with that. Sometimes the preference is even culturally induced. Ok, fine! I also know that some guys prefer what they don’t have. Lots of clipped men like uncut cock, and lots of natural men prefer their partners to be cut. Some people make a big to-do about foreskin, as you suggest, because they think it’s unsightly and/or unclean. Personally, I think that’s complete baloney, but hey, to each his own. Right?

cock-buffet.jpgI also know that most people who have a strong cut/uncut preference want to know in advance if their perspective partner’s dick is to their liking. And obviously, the only way to find that out is to ask outright. Ok, so far so good.

What I don’t understand about your question is that you think it might be whorish to be up-front and ask a guy about the condition of his trouser snake. Like, WHY? Either you don’t understand the meaning of the word “whore,” or you’re too self-conscious about taking responsibility for your personal tastes in tonsil ticklers . Either way it makes no sense.

Think about it this way, say you don’t ask and you discover, to your great dismay, that the guy you’re about to bone has some fine lace curtains. And you get all turned off and this screws up the screwing. You feel bad, he feels bad, and you look like a jerk. Wouldn’t it have been better to save yourself and your unlucky partner the embarrassment of shutting down a fuck by taking responsibility for your predilection before cloths come flying off? Heck, I don’t know about you, but I’d prefer to be thought of as a whore than a complete asshole.

Dr Dick has a hard and fast rule when it comes to sex. If you can’t bring yourself to ask for what you want, then you deserve what you get.

Name: William
Gender:
Age: 30
Location: UK
Hi There
I am new to this scene, and I have very little experience in anal sex and I am seeking your help and advice. I am a top but I have a problem keeping my dick hard or staying hard during anal sex. I find it harder to fuck an ass compared to fucking a pussy. Here is the problem: Once I get my dick hard, put on a condom and start fucking, my dick sometimes goes soft on me. Is that normal? How can I keep my dick hard long enough in the ass to enjoy the fuck? Sometimes even when my dick is hard, I find it hard to penetrate an ass. I use lube, so what am I doing wrong? People in gay porn can fuck and fuck like there is no tomorrow. I want to enjoy anal sex too!! Any advice? Please let me know if there is anything I can do to improve in this area?

Boy, you’re in luck, William! Last week I published my long-awaited: Finessing That Ass Fuck — A Tutorial For a Top. Check it out! It’ll answer a lot of the questions you have about butt fucking.

But before you take off to read that, I’d like to address one of the specific issues you raise, about keeping your dick hard while fucking. You are right to point out that fucking an ass (male or female) is different from fucking a pussy. But regardless of what hole you’re invading, a nice hard stiffy issex_toys_dj212901.jpg essential.

Do you know what a cockring is, William? If not, I suggest you acquaint yourself with these amazing low-tech wonders. Here’s what you should do. Turn your attention to the Eden Fantasys banner at the top of this page. Click through that link and go to the Sex Toys for Men section. Look for Erection Help there you will see the link to cockrings. Prepare yourself to be sorely amazed at the variety and functionality of these little devils.

Cock rings can create larger and firmer erections. Since blood flow enters your dick through arteries deep inside your dick, and leaves it through the veins nearer the surface of your schlong; wearing a cock ring can help to sex_toys_gef90178bs.jpgkeep more blood inside your dick shaft. And as all you rocket scientists know, blood flow is what causes erections in the first place. Also some men claim that wearing a cock ring intensifies their orgasm.

I recommend the flexible and/or adjustable cockrings. These are generally made of stretchable rubber or leather. For the more daring there are the metal variety. These may look pretty, but they can be a bitch to put on and to take off. Here’s how ya put a rigid one on.

  1. Pull your ball sack through the ring first.
  2. Follow this by popping each of your balls through the ring one at a time.
  3. Now bend your cock down and pull it through the ring.

As you can see, putting one of these little buggers on before you have a raging hardon is gonna be easier. To take the cock ring off, simply reverse these steps, pushing your flaccid cock back through the ring first, followed by each of your balls and finally your ball sack.

It’s absolutely essential that you not wear an inflexible (metal) ring for longer than a couple hours. Make sure you don’t buy one that is too small either. If your dick is turning an angry red or worse, purple, or it is cold to the touch, you’re in trouble. Take that ring off immediately. If you don’t you will risk serious injury to your precious johnson.

Remember people, play smart with all your toys!

NEXT, ANOTHER SEXUAL ENRICHMENT TUTORIAL

Beginning Sex Play — Tips and Techniques

The most frequent questions I get are from your average dick and jane, (or dick and dick, or jane and jane) who want to spice up their sex life. Inevitably they describe the kind of sex they’re currently having. And almost universally the description makes this grown man cry. Jeez, the boredom. How do they stand it? It’s a wonder any of them are having any sex at all.

What is it with the humdrum, run of the mill, we’ve always done it that way mentality? Are ya’ll afraid that if you add a little something new to your sex chore. from time to time, that the sky will fall? Holy cow!

Today’s tutorial is another attempt to motivate you to get off your butts and make something interesting happen in the sex department. We’ll begin with what was once called foreplay.

First off, I hate the word “foreplay” because it suggests that all these really great sex activities are only a lead up to a single — “more important” activity — fucking. It also implies that ya’ll can dispense with the one in order to hurry up and get to the other. And that, my friends, is always a huge mistake.

do-not-disturb.jpgFrom now on I want us to banish “foreplay” from our vocabulary. Instead let’s start using “Beginning Sex Play”. It says it all. It says it’s at the beginning, but there’s no suggestion that anything in particular must follow.

I’m of the mind that we’d all be better served if we thought of sex play as a continuum of pleasure and pleasuring — with a beginning, middle and an end. If you ask me, our sex play ought mirror our sexual response cycles — arousal, plateau, orgasm and resolution. That way we’re less likely to overburden one particular activity at the expense of all the others. Get it? Got it? Good!

Experienced sex fans agree; the best sexual encounters include an extended period of sensual play at the beginning of most sex play. This brings increased pleasure to both partners, and will make whatever else that might follow more satisfying. Just remember, beginning sex play can be a meal in itself.

Beginning sex play brings spice to the encounter because it gets our motors started. Even all yousex_toys_rd9613.jpg major sex athletes out there who are perpetually primed for sex will benefit from some hearty beginning sex play. It will help cool your jets and make the encounter last longer than a firecracker. And I know that you know what I mean!

In our hectic rush around world, beginning sex play is particularly important. It helps us transition from the daily cares and woes to the realm of sensual pleasures. The workaholics among us need more time to become fully aroused. Their minds are still filled with the junk of the day, and not yet ready to give or receive pleasure. And pleasuring and being pleasured takes a big attitude shift from that of the rest of the day. In fact, if you’re gonna approach sex and pleasuring with the same mindset you have on the job or with the kids, give it up now and be done with it. You’ll only walk away from the encounter disappointed.

sex_toys_ki0001.jpgBeginning sex play primes us for maximum pleasure. Men will have the time we need to come to full erection and women will have the time they need to properly lubricate. By the way, this is called the arousal stage in our sexual response cycle. But you probably know that already, right?

When we stop thinking of beginning sex play as “foreplay” we realize there is no such thing as spending too much time giving and getting pleasure. If beginning sex play evolves into full-on fucking — SWELL. Both partners will be fully aroused and fucking will flow naturally and effortlessly from the pleasure enjoyed at the beginning of sex play.

Beginning sex play can include everything from chocolate and whipped cream to whips and chains. But let’s not get too far ahead of our selves. Let’s start at the beginning of beginning sex play. Most people miss out on the pleasure of undressing with and for their partners. Stripping out of, or being helped out of our daily wear and into something sexysex_toys_ks0092.jpg or nothing at all can be very arousing. It’s also a visual signal that we’re shifting out of our work-a-day world and entering the realm of sensuality. Stripping is an art form, ya know. We could all learn a lesson or two from the folks who do this for a living, but more about this in a later tutorial.

Creating the right sex environment is important too. Make sure the room is warm. Proper lighting and music will surely add to the mood. Scents are also important. More and more people are incorporating erotica into their sex play — reading a sexy story together or enjoying some hot porn will make the encounter memorable.

Most women complain that their partners don’t kiss long enough and rush the kissing to get at their pussy. Guys, what the fuck? You want pussy? Use your mouth to maximum advantage kiss and nibble all over everything. Literally devour your partner with your mouth. Believe me, if you do this right, by the time you get to her pussy she’s gonna want sex_toys_055337396x.jpgto give it up big time.

Beginning sex play is the perfect time for setting the mood for all that might follow. It’s a time for sharing fantasies, role-playing, dirty talk or some full body massage. Always have some nice lotion available then use your hands, forearms, feet and elbows to knead your partner’s muscles and naughty bits.

Certain areas on the body are more hot-wired than others. It’s your job to find each and every one your partner has. As you massage vary your strokes and touch to stimulate your partner. Roll your fingertips across his or her nipples and behind his or her ears as you kiss him and tease her with your tongue.

If you’re doin things right, your partner will be moaning with pleasure. If she or he starts getting impatient it’s time to bring out the restraints. There’s nothing like some hot erotic bondage to punctuate your beginning sex play.

While your darling is subdued and possibly blindfolded, crank things up a notch. Add differentsex_toys_ss34047.jpg
sensations and stimuli, a warm chocolate sauce followed by ice cream. A fur mitt followed by a Loofah. Introduce some sex toys — a vibrator, tit clamps, or an anal stimulator.

Don’t forget to check in with your partner from time to time. Ask for some feedback and direction. Do you like this? Or do you like this better? Never presume to know what your partner likes simply because he or she liked it before, this is a recipe for boredom and the dreaded bed death. If words fail you, SHOW your partner what you want. Then encourage your partner to do the same to you.

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Beginning sex play is not about pressing the right buttons in the right order. It is about understanding what makes your partner tick and supplying and applying those things to their greatest sensual advantage. There are many ways to give your partner extreme pleasure, and it all begins in your brain. Beginning sex play is as much of an art form as it is a necessity.

Finally, the basic premise behind all of this is that a great lover is one that gives pleasure because it is its own reward, not a means to getting something else.

Good luck ya’ll

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Hard To Imagine

Name: Gwen
Gender:
Age: 57
Location: Philly
My husband and I have been married for 33 years. Our relationship is hell when it comes to sex. My husband is overweight, and he’s stressed out about his elderly parents. Sex is non-existent. He never was the instigator in our relationship. And he is the kind of guy who thinks having sex on the couch as opposed to the bedroom is adventuresome. He has become so boring. I don’t believe the man feels sex should be that important at our ages. (I’m 57 and he’s 62) I, on the other hand, am more sexually aroused and creative than ever now that I am more mature and the kids are out of the house. Menopause and all the sex on the internet helps too. ;-) Is there anything I can do to make my man return to being a healthy sexual being once again? Thank you, Gwen

No, thank you, Gwen. Your complaint is a familiar one. In fact, so familiar I regularly offer therapy groups for couples in long-term relationships. Like you and your old man, these couples have, for one reason or another, hit a wall when it comes to their sex lives.

I take a very unique approach to these groups by inviting both straight and gay couples to the same group. At first I got a lot of resistance. Most couples, both gay and straight, thought there was nothing to be learned from a couple unlike them. They couldn’t imagine why I would want to integrate the group in such a manner. I think most of my couples felt more comfortable in being in a segregated group — straight folks with straight folks, gay folks with gay folks.01.jpg

But that is. of course, precisely the reason I integrate the groups. I don’t want them to feel all comfy and cozy, I wanted them to work and learn and stretch themselves out of their sexual doldrums. At first, I had to ask all my couples to suspend judgment about an integrated group until they had an opportunity to participate in one. Now I don’t encounter so much resistance. Word’s gotten out that this is a really creative solution to an otherwise tricky problem. And that old married couples, regardless if they are gay, lesbian or straight have very similar problems. And they can and do learn from one another.

To your specific issue, Gwen, I’m sad to say there’s not much you can do to beef up your sex life if there’s no interest on the part of your husband to do so. I mean, you can lead the horse to cooter, but you can’t make him lick.

200.jpgYou confide that your husband is overweight and stressed. Not a happy combination when it comes to his sexual response cycle. In fact, your husband sounds like a heart attack waiting to happen. Perhaps if your challenged him about his general health — encourage weight loss and stress reduction, you might find that this would also reignite his sex drive. It’s worth a try.

And thank you for mentioning menopause. So many women find the changes that take place in midlife confusing and disorientating. It’s so good to hear from a woman who is eager to explore and enjoy her sexuality post-menopause.

Men also go through changes, in midlife. There’s even a name for it — andropause — the male menopause as it were. It’s clear that as we age, both women and men need more time and stimulation to get aroused. The slower, more sensuous foreplay that often results is a welcome change for most women and even some men.

Increased focus on sensuality, intimacy, and communication can help a sexual relationship remain rewarding even well into one’s senior years. I think you already know this, Gwen, but many women in my audience don’t.

If your husband is avoiding intercourse, there still many ways of expressing your love and staying connected:

  • Hugging, cuddling, kissing
  • Touching, stroking, massage, sensual baths
  • Masturbation and oral sex

However, if your husband is more wedded to food and to stress than he is to you, and1019.jpg if he continues to refuse to join you in finding an appropriate outlet for your sexual frustration, then it’s up to you to make this happen on your own. 57 is way too young to say good by to your sex life. You’re still a fine cougar with lots to offer.

May I suggest that you join a women’s group. Not a therapy group, but more of a support group or activities group. Getting out of the house, being involved with other self-actualized mature women, may uncover the secret solutions other women have put in place to find sexual satisfaction when they are without a partner or have a partner who’s no longer interested in them. I think you will be surprised by how creative your sisters can be. Make it happen, Gwen. Don’t sink to the lowest common denominator of living a sexless life.

The Suppressing Gag Reflex — A Tutorial

Arguably, the humble blowjob is the most common partnered sexual activity for men — straight, bi or gay. It’s pretty obvious why the gays like to suck cock. But nowadays loads of straight women have taken to smokin’ some pole too. Let’s face it; it’s a great way to give pleasure. Regardless of whether it’s part of foreplay, after play, or the main event — like relieving the Commander in Chief in the oval office after a long day of comandering and chiefing, don’t cha know.deep.jpg

Certain skills are essential for mind-blowing oral sex. The preeminent skill, of course, is mastering the gag reflex. But close behind that is keeping your partner’s spooge off your blue dress.

Did you know that the gag response is least active in the morning? That’s right, my pretties, you’re gonna have to know things like this if you aspire to getting a gold medal in cock sucking. Besides, tidbits like this also make for the most charming dinner party trivia.

Today we’re gonna look at three important aspects of understanding and suppressing that nasty gag reflex when chowin’ down on some love muscle.

1) ANATOMY

So let’s take a semi-serious look at the gag response and why we have it. Millions of years of evolution have provided us the anatomical function we call the gag reflex to protect our throat. And as all you rocket scientists know an obstruction in your throat — in either your larynx, which connects to your lungs or the pharynx, which connects to your stomach could be deadly. And since us humans breathe more often than we swallow, the larynx is always open. We all have a piece of cartilage known as the epiglottis at the back of our throat that responds to swallowing. This is not to be confused with the uvula, which is that little thingy that hangs down from the back of your mouth.

Isn’t this fascinating? Aren’t you delighted you stopped by today? Hold on, there’s01010501020801031020070602eaccf0a24f0ac5e33500b857.jpg more!

The passageway to the stomach is fairly narrow, although you’d never guess that from the way some folks wolf down their food. The gag reflex protects us from getting something stuck in there. If the object being swallowed — a big old cock or a piece of cold pizza — can’t easily pass the opening of the pharynx, the epiglottis flaps triggering the gag response. This forces the foreign object — big old cock or cold pizza — out. This is a lifesaving reflex because it protects us from literally biting off more than he can swallow. And since there’s not gonna be a whole lot of biting off and chewing when we blow some dude, the gag reflex can be pretty pronounced.

The object of this tutorial is to help us subdue this lifesaving reflex when needed. The first thing we should know is when suckin’ cock, the dick in question can’t get stuck in our pharynx because, happily it’s attached to the dude we’re blowin’. It can, therefore, be removed without the coughing and choking associated with the garden variety of gagging.

Let’s review. Your tongue, your salivary glands, your hard palate, your soft palate, your uvula, your epiglottis, your tonsils, and your pharynx are all parts of the sensory experience for you as well as your partner with his dick in your mouth. When you deep throat his johnson, your uvula and the epiglottis tickle his dickhead. I guess that’s why us mens like getting’ head so much.

Like anything worth doing, mastering the gag reflex takes practice. The most important thing to remember is that we cannot simultaneously inhale and swallow. Also the epiglottis is very flexible, while the pharynx is relatively rigid.

Let’s do some math. The depth of our mouth — from the lips to the curve in the pharynx just in the back of the throat is three of four to inches. The pharynx runs another five and half inches or so before the esophagus begins, which continues another eight or nine inches. That makes for total passageway available for swallowing cock between seventeen and nineteen inches long. How’s that for adaptability? Your throat is not just for sword-swallowing any more! As long as your partner’s prick is neither too wide nor too stiff to make the turn in the pharynx, an average cocksucker can completely swallow just about anyone for a short period of time while holding his or her breath.

2) POSITION

Probably you’ve already guessed that positioning the cock your sucking at just the4002.jpg right angle down your throat is crucial. Check it out. Take a deep breath; insert two fingers as far as possible into your mouth. Your fingers will bend easily downward. While you’re rootin’ around inside there, you’ll immediately have a sense of internal capacity of your oral cavity. Carefully placing a couple fingers at the back of your mouth shouldn’t cause you to gag, but moving them around might. This underscores the importance of having the willie you’re about to swallow go in the right direction.

So let’s say you’re on your knees, with the intended cock right in front of you. If it’s rock-hard and/or curved upward, as some of those darling things are, that dick is gonna go pounding against your tonsils, making you gag, sure as shootin’. The dude’s cock has to go in and then down your throat, not up and against the roof of your mouth. Got it? Jamming his member against your hard palate will also be pretty unpleasant for the owner of the said cock. This could easily give his dickhead a real owie!

This brings us to the ever-popular sixty-nine position. It’s so popular because it points the dude’s rod toward the base of your tongue, thereby successfully navigating of the curve in your throat.

3) BREATHING
A proper breathing technique is as important as position to happy deep throating. The aquatic minded among us already have the key. Swimmers know that synchronizing one’s breathing with the motion one is making with his or her arms and legs makes for less effort and more stamina. The same is true for the person gulping a big one…or even a small one for that matter. You’ll want to inhale while doing down on his cock, exhale quickly while coming up, then inhale again going back down. The deeper you inhale on the down stroke, the longer you’ll be able to hold216008009_ac9a5d9974.jpg your breath. And PRESTO! The longer you’re able to hold your breath the deeper your partner’s baloney pony will disappear down your gullet. So you see it’s exactly like swimming, only completely different.

For the non-athletes in my audience there is another way to learn to control the gag reflex. Simply practice holding your breath and swallowing at the same time.

We could all learn a lot from the little piggie cocksucker among us. They’re in this whole blowjob thing for the long haul, and they know that pacing one’s self is crucial. They know how important it is to pull off the cock from time to time, at least far enough to take in some air before going down on it again. If you try this you could make some yummy sounds while you pull off his cock. Or you could take it out of your mouth and look at it admiringly. He’ll be impressed that you like his rigid piece of art, and only you’ll know that what you’re actually doing is simply catching your breath.

You should know that deep throating a pleasure prong is gonna make a lot of saliva. This is a double-edged sword. Great for keeping things lubed up, but problematic if that abundant saliva falls into the larynx and makes you cough and choke. If your saliva becomes a problem rather than an asset try relaxing for a bit with his cock in the forward of your mouth so that your larynx will open for breathing. This shallow sucking is a delightful counterpoint to deep throat sucking. You can also practice relaxing and stretching the muscles that regulate swallowing by opening your mouth wide, like in a yawn.

Whichever technique or combination of techniques works for you, remember to breathe. Accumulation of mucous will sometimes mean you have to take a break to spit. If you try to continue without spitting, it will just make you uncomfortable. And who need that?

Also when you deep throat your nose will run and your eyes will water. So if you’re wearing a lot of makeup when you’re blowin’ your guy, you’ll look like a raccoon with a clown face by the time you’re through. Some guys really like this. It suggests to them that they have a really big dick to have wreaked so much havoc.deepthroat.jpg

You’ll probably want to keep at least one of your hands on his pole while you’re sucking it. This will give you more control, especially when he starts pelvic thrusting.

It’s a good idea to keep a hand on his balls too, as they are usually a good indicator of how close your man is to cuming. As he gets closer to shooting, the skin on his scrotum tightens and pulls his balls towards his body to warm them up. You can let this happen on its own, or help out by stimulating his jewels with your hand, tongue, or mouth.

Finally, a common mistake most women and some men make while blowin their guy is using only their mouth to repeatedly bob up and down his weener. This is neither pretty or particularly helpful! Some folks continue doing this until they get a sore jaw or neck. A good deep-throatin’ blowjob should not be too repetitive. The wise cocksucker will keep her/his hands busy throughout. She’ll include stroking his dick, exploring balls, thighs and asshole. By mixing things up, he’ll allow his mouth and throat muscles to relax. This will improve one’s performance and will subdue one’s gag reflex.

Good Lick…I mean Luck…ya’ll

Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered!

Name: Jean
Gender: female
Age: 36
Location: New Haven, CT
I’ve been with the same man for 14 years. We both decided to become Christians about a year ago. Now he’s not interested in sharing the same bed and not interested in having sex with me. It tried to overlook this hoping it was some kind of phase, but it goes on and on and he still doesn’t want sex. He’s the only man that could ever satisfy me sexually. I dated a few guys, four to be exact, before we met. I still love this guy but he won’t acknowledge my feelings. I feel like I’m losing everything, my best friend, my partner, my lover …and my sanity. I’m happy we’re still together, but I’m frustrated to the point of exhaustion without my sex life. Any ideas what I could do to turn this around?

What an unhappy tale of woe you have you have to tell, Jean. The Christian conversion thing didn’t quite work out like ya thought, huh? Well maybe it has less to do with Christianity per se, and more to do with the Joe you converted with.

I’ve heard similar complaints from other people whose partners have unilaterally decided to make a radical life-change for themselves. Often these new zealots fail to appreciate how their life altering decisions impact on the wellbeing of their mate. And because they are so damn single-minded about their new passion — as every zealot is, there is rarely any talking to them.

Two former clients come to mind. First, there was George, a gay man in a 10-year relationship with this other really sweet guy, Robert. Eight years into the relationship Robert had a heart attack. Despite a full recovery and living a much healthier lifestyle after the hear attack, Robert got it in his head that if he were to have sex again, it would kill him. There was no reasoning with him. No sex ever again, period. This otherwise blessed relationship ended painfully. Pity that!

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Another client, Melissa, discovered long-distance running two years into her marriage to Allen. She became like a woman possessed. Running consumed her. Her career, her friends and family, her social life all suffered. But no one took the brunt of her newfound craze more than her husband. At first sex was out of the question because there was no time. Then all that body-punishing running radically changed her metabolism. She even stopped menstruating. Her libido virtually expired. Even the imminent demise of her relationship didn’t alter her running routine. So basically old Melissa just ran away from her marriage. Simple as all that!

In your case, Jean, your partner appears to have bought into the some of the worst sex-negative messages of Christianity. I suspect that there’s no turning this around and, unless you wish to continue to sacrifice your sexuality on this unworthy altar, I’d suggest you make peace with the fact that life will never return to how it once was.And what’s all this about he being the only man who could satisfy you? You’ve had only 4 other partners, for christ sake! And most, if not all, were crummy lovers. Am I right? You’re not the kind of gal that quits shopping for shoes after trying on only 5 pair, are you?There is a whole world of men out there that would be happily give you what you aren’t getting at home and some of them may even be good lovers. If no accommodation can be made with your husband about fulfilling your needs, than I suggest you beat a hasty exit.The longer you stay in this unhealthy environment the greater the chance will be that you will become more and more embittered. God gave us the gift of sexuality for a purpose. It was meant to give us pleasure and enhance life. Your sexuality is in danger of becoming just the opposite of what nature intended. Do yourself a favor and choose life and happiness. You’ll be glad you did…so will God.

Name: Pete
Gender: Male
Age: 22
Location: Ohio
dr dick: I am gay and i have no idea how to break it to my family. and they say all the time when they see a gay guy look at that fag glad he’s not my kid. i would disown him. just wondering if u could help me.

Ain’t it a bitch being surrounded by a bunch of yahoos! Coming out is rarely easy, but doing so to ignorant, fearful, bigoted people is the worst.

Pete, you should know that all bigotry is deeply rooted in the bigot’s own fear about him or herself. It stands to reason, all irrational fears and hatred, like homophobia, are more indicative of the troubled psychological make-up of the one with the prejudice, rather than the people he or she abhors.

Often people will use religion to back up their prejudice. It’s particularly galling when non-religious people do this. But it’s safe to say that authentically religious people don’t need to persecute or ostracize those who do not believe as they do. Any more than authentically heterosexual people need to persecute or ostracize people of other sexual persuasions. Let that be the standard by which you judge the worth of any message coming from a religious dogmatist or a moralizing heterosexual.9e.jpg

Before you start in on the self-disclosure thing with your family, Pete, I suggest you first try to clear a path for that discussion. Begin by challenging those around you who shame or denigrate those who are different. Ask them why they make such ridiculously uninformed and hurtful statements. Ask them if degrading other people makes them feel superior. And if it does, what does that say about their inadequacies. You could suggest that their intolerance of gay and lesbian people proves they have some hidden, unresolved sexual issues that they need to address. I mean — “me thinks you doth protest too much” — and all that, right?

If your family environment doesn’t improve with that tactic, you may find that, at least in the short run, discretion is the better part of valor. Sometimes coming out to one’s family is best done only after you’ve come out to friends and co-workers. This strategy will provide you a bank of support that you can fall back on if the family disclosure things turn out badly.

My counsel to those just starting the coming out process is to reserve the good news about you and your sexuality for the audience best situated for receiving it. Celebrate your queerness with open-minded people first. Nowadays there’s much more acceptance of alternative lifestyles in the popular culture then ever before. Particularly younger people seem to have more tolerance for diversity. But however you choose to handle this difficult but important developmental task, don’t sink to the lowest common denominator. Don’t cave into the bigotry that surrounds you. Don’t let it intimidate you into a life of shame, repression or self-loathing. Live authentically. Pete, and live proud! Because when you do, you are a shining example of a happy, healthy, integrated and well-adjusted human being.

Finally, just remember you are not alone. Sex positive and gay positive organizations abound. If you need help with any of your coming out, if you’re feeling isolated and alone — turn to one of them. They are there to help. And there are even support organizations for your family members too. Turn them on to: PFLAG (parents and friends of gays and lesbians).

Name: Bob
Gender: Male
Age: 54
Location: Laguna Beach
As an older man, I’ve started having performance problems. Unfortunately there’s no decrease in my libido. I think some of my problem is psychological. I’m also HIV+. And I find myself worrying about transmission even with condoms. But some of the problem is physical. I do wear a cock ring and that helps I guess. Is there anything else I can do to increase my performance to match my libido?

Your concern is a familiar one, Bob. Men regularly present this problem in my private practice and I also have a personal familiarity with the issue in my own life.

Diminished performance, at least in terms of a perpetually stiff dick, is a natural occurrence as we age. There was a time when I thought this was a major problem. I don’t think like that now. These days I’m helping my older clients (and myself) appreciate the full range of sensuality that is the unique purview of us more seasoned lovers. I’ve always felt that as gay men we are too genitally focused, especially when it comes at the expense of all the other pleasure zones our bodies have been gifted with.p.jpg

The rushed, hormonally driven sex of my youth has matured into a slower, more relaxed and sensual sexuality that I am thoroughly enjoying. This has been one of the very best gifts of the aging process. It’s even having an effect on my younger partners and they are appreciative.So I no longer equate performance with a stiff dick. For those times when I absolutely need a rock-hard hardon a cock ring does just fine. I’m aware that I may need more time to achieve this kind of erection, but I’m not just twiddling my thumbs while I’m waiting, if ya know what I mean. I am no longer frustrated by this natural phenomenon, because I no longer have unrealistic expectations.

I realize that many men are experimenting with an erection-enhancing medication such as Viagra, but I suggest that this be reserved for those who are truly experiencing erection dysfunction.

I’m also concerned with the alarming rise of younger men, men in their 20’s and 30’s who are using Viagra or another similar drugs recreationally. This is very troubling. If your young body is having difficulty producing an erection, then you need medical attention ASAP, or maybe you just need some sleep. However, if you’re abusing Viagra just so you can have an erection that lasts for hours that’s a real bad idea for several reasons. Not least of which is your body will habituate itself to that stuff and you will find that, in time, you won’t be able to get it up at all without ever increasing doses of Viagra.

This is gonna fuck up your cardiovascular system big time. In fact, you may very well be inducing the very sexual dysfunction the drug is supposed to help. Consider the person who overuses eye drops or lip balm or any number of otherwise innocuous health and beauty products. Their body will stop making the natural substances that these over the counter products are intended to assist. It’s counterproductive and it’s ill advised. If this is a problem with relatively harmless over the counter products, you know you are playing with fire when you’re abusing powerful prescription meds.

Whoops, sorry Bob, I went off topic there for a minute. It’s just that every opportunity I get to put out a message that will dissuade someone from hurting himself or herself, I just launch into it.So back to you. It is clear from what you tell me, your performance problems do, as you suggest, also have a psychological component to them. You have a fear that, despite being responsible in your sex play and even though you play safe, you could accidentally pass on HIV.

It’s true; one’s brain can indeed override almost every function of our body. For example, we draw each and every breath we take without even thinking about it. However, if a situation dictates our brain can and does override that essential pulmonary function and we can hold our breath. The same is true with our sexual response cycle. Sometimes we can become sexually aroused without really thinking about it. However, if for one reason or another our brain assisted by our conscience interferers with or even shuts down the sexual arousal, then that’s pretty much all she wrote.

Your scruples about the possibility that you could accidentally pass along HIV are interfering with your sexual response cycle. No cockring or an erection-enhancing medication is going to change that darlin’!In other words, the problem is not in your cock, the problem is in your head. This is something you’re gonna have to wrestle with and finally resolve. This tension between your head and your dick is actually a good thing. Your body is providing you an opportunity to align your moral values with your sexual performance. How will this resolve itself? I couldn’t say. But I know for sure resolution is possible.

I do suggest, however, that you not try to do this in a vacuum. Reach out to a HIV support group or a sex-positive therapist for the help you need in making peace between your head and your cock.

Good luck, ya’ll

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The Crotch Report

Name: Gillian
Gender: Female
Age: 27
Location: Paris
Hi Dr Dick, My boyfriend and I are having a long distance relationship. When living together, we used to have an intense sex life … so you can imagine how frustrated we feel now … I don’t know when I’m going to visit him and how we’re going to make it without having sex! Could you help us copping with the distance? Are there some techniques, sex toys, etc … we could use ? Of course I have a vibrator but it would be so much better if my boyfriend could participate in a way, and vice versa … I can’t wait to get your advice!! Thanks!

Long-distance romances aren’t fun! Never fall in love with anyone outside your zip code! That’s what I always say. Of course, when it comes to matters of the heart, most good advice goes out the window. Thanks to the marvels of modern technology I may have the solution to your dilemma. Do you guys cam with one another? I hope so. If not the following advice will still be helpful; you’ll just not have the juicy visuals.

c770.jpgYou’ll both need an iPod (or another music player) and you’ll need one of these puppies: OhMiBod iPod Vibrator (C770). You’ll find these right here in My Stockroom.

The OhMiBod iPod Vibrator is an exciting combination of modern musical and sexual technology. In today’s hi-tech, fast paced world it only makes sense to fuse together two of the most popular forms of technological recreation, listening to music on your iPod and masturbating using a high-powered vibrator.

The OhMiBod iPod Vibrator is very easy to use.

  • Simply plug the universal headphone connector into your iPod (or music player)
  • Plug 1 end of the 3-foot cord into the headphone connector, and one end into the jack in the vibrator’s silver end-cap.
  • Turn on your iPod and use the volume control wheel to increase the intensity, rhythm, and vibe function. The vibration level, and the rhythm it moves to, is determined by the volume and style of the music.

The vibrator is 71⁄2 ” long and has a 1″ diameter. The vibe, cord, and connector are all white, and the end-cap is silver. Smashing!

So here’s what you do…and you can take turns doing this too. Find some music that you know for sure will get you off. Share that music with your BF. Have him load it into his iPod. Then set up a cam date. After you exchange pleasantries, you can get down to business. Insert your vibe into your pussy; your BF will insert his vibe into his ass. Go to the play list you put together and simultaneously start the music. Despite the distance between you, you’ll have all the same sensations. Before you know it, you both will be haven’ screamin’ memes. How fun is that?

And when you guys aren’t camming, you’ll find the OhMiBod iPod Vibrator comes with an extra silver end-cap that can be used without the music player. Imagine what a swell holiday gift idea this will be for all you far-flung lovers.

Name: Terre
Gender:
Age: 54
Location: Nashville
What are some of the newer procedures available for peyronies??

For those not in the know, Peyronie’s disease causes a guys dick to bend or curve dramatically when he gets a hardon. A hard, fibrous layer of scar tissue (plaque) develops under the skin on one side of his dick. When he gets hard, the scar tissue pulls the affected area off at an angle, causing the curve or disfigurement. Sometimes things can get so bad that the pain makes fucking practically impossible.

There are several “therapies” out there; none of which is supported by any hard data as to its effectiveness. So caveat emptor, which is Latin for “Let the buyer beware”!

There are both internal and some external therapies. There is a very expensive enzymes therapy that is taken in pill form. Allegedly the enzymes help break up the scar tissue. It’s a very slow process, if it works at all and it requires a prolonged and consistent treatment. Cha ching!

Some doctors will inject drugs, like calcium channel blockers or interferon, directly into the plaque in a guy’s dick. These drugs are said to break down scar tissue deposits and return the tissue-building process to normal. This therapy calls for multiple injections over a period of months. And the success of this treatment varies considerably. Cha ching!

There are Penile Traction Devices too. These create a gentle continuous tension on a guy’s unit. The claim is that the stretching opens up spaces between penile cells, and triggers growth and healing, thus resolving the issue. This is dubious at best.

Here are a couple of resources for you: The Peyronie’s Disease Society and The Peyronie’s Disease Institute.

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Name: a
Gender: Male
Age: 22
Location: ph
if a male was to get a sex change would a vagina be able to be made to make the operation complete, and if so would having a baby be possible

Yep, a post-surgical Male to Female transexual will have had a “functional” vagina fashioned from the cock “she” once had.

Nope, it takes a lot more than a brand spankin’ new whoha to make babies, darlin’. A post-surgical Male to Female transexual may have a pussy, but she doesn’t have a womb…so no babies.

Name: victor
Gender: Male
Age: 39
Location: LA
I don’t like sex as much as i use to been with the same guy for 15 yrs and could do it all the time now only once a week and he has to initiate it but once we are doing it is great. What can i do about it? Thanks victor

You sound like you’re more bored with, than disinterested in, sex. If you were disinterested in sex, you wouldn’t enjoy it when you actually got around to having some.

Sounds like your sex life needs a little sprucin’ up…and who’s doesn’t? I want you to mozie on over to my online sex emporium — My Stockroom — and pick out something really fun and smutty for you and your old man. Don’t let another day go by without at least trying to get back on track!

I have a dazzling array of products that will liven up even the most ho-hum sex life. Not sure what to buy? Not to worry! Take a look at my monthly ever so popular, Sex Toy Awareness feature right here on drdicksexadvice.com. It’s chock-full of swell gift giving ideas.

Name: garciaf54
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Location: texas
Hi im 23 years old and i belive my packege isnt enough for the girl im dating and probably any. My dick is 6 inches nothing more nothing less but is this normal or i need help?

You’re worrying way too much about your package, darlin’. Your 6” is adequate for getting the job done, especially if you know how to use what you have. Women are generally less concerned about the size of the meat as they are about the quality of the motion.

So yeah, you’re normal, but you may also need some help. I’d suggest you check in with your GF and find out how you’re doin’ in the love makin’ department. I’d be willing to guess that she may have a few pointers for you on how better to use what you got. But you’ll have to ask her nicely.

Young pups, like you, rarely know their way around a fine pussy. Hell, most women don’t know their way around their own fine pussy. Young pups, like you, may also be unaware of all the sexual positions that would best utilize a modest johnson. If this sounds like you, I’d say you have some homework to do.

Name: krishna
Gender: Male
Age: 33
Location: india
i love my cousin sister a lot, i am enjoying sex with her, is that wrong?

I actually had to look up “cousin sister” on the internet. While I came up with some conflicting information, one thing seems clear, the term “cousin sister” connotes a close biological tie — a first cousin, perhaps. Is that what you’re talking about?

If so, most cultures, even yours, frown upon incest. There are plenty of good reasons for this; not least of all is a genetic concern (inbreeding). But often the most devastating aspect of incest is the secrecy. No one violates this universal taboo in the open. I’ll bet this is the case with you too, huh? The secrecy and the inevitable shame and guilt can destroy you family dynamic.

I suspect you may already be aware of this. Why else would you be asking me if it was wrong?

Name: brnwiee
Gender: Male
Age: 24
Location: canada
why does my condom always break? am i too big 4 normal condoms? my size is 7.5 inc long n 6.5 inc girth………am i thrusting too hard?/// n is it possible 4a girl too deepthroat it all?

Maybe you need a bigger sized condom, darling. You know there are different sizes, right? Shop online for extra large condoms. Most online retailers will offer a varietybiggunsampler.jpg pack of the big boys. This way you’ll be able to choose the right condom for you without buying a box full of just one kind from the get-go.

Depending on the “girl” I’d say, you betcha deep-throating 7.5 wouldn’t be a problem. However, finding that particular woman might be your biggest challenge. You may have to turn to a “pro” for that kind of service.

Name: ken
Gender: Male
Age: 45
Location: toronto canada
low sperm count is there anyway of building this up ?

Nope! Despite the myriad products online that proclaim they will build up your sperm count; it’s all baloney. Don’t waste your money!

Name: Paul
Gender: Malebj01.jpg
Age: 21
Location: RI
My gf used to give me blowjobs quite a bit but all of a sudden she stopped and kept telling me she can’t stand doing them. She has always said she didn’t like them but that she did them cause I liked them so much. Why the hell would she stop now?

I guess she’s trying to tell you she doesn’t like you as much as she once did.

Here’s a tip: most chicks dole out the hummers as a reward for being the best little boy in the world. If she’s cut you off, so to speak, perhaps you’ve done something to piss her off. I’d look into that, if I were you.

Good luck ya’ll

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