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Name: Stanford
Gender: male
Age: 25
Location: Green Bay
I was wondering if you have any suggestions for a homemade dildo?

Do you actually want to craft a dildo yourself? Or is this more a question about what might be readily available to safely bugger yourself with?

If you want to make one yourself, there are several “Make-your-own-dildo” kits out there. You can find them online. They supply you with everything you need to make a latex dildo cast of your own dong. And from that the dildo is made. How fun! But wait, what if you are princess tiny-meat? Cloning your you own willie will satisfy no one, no how. Unless you know someone with a more ample endowment that will lend you his hog for the mold, this is probably not the way for you to go.

A trip to the supermarket might be your next best bet. People have been stuffing fruits and vegetables in every possible orifice for as long as there have been fruits and vegetables…and orifices to stuff. Bananas, zucchini, corn cobs, cucumbers, and well the list goes on and on. One word of caution, make sure that whatever you’re poppin’ in your pooper is long enough that you can keep hold of it while you are workin’ your magic. You definitely don’t want it to let whatever slip past your sphincter and lodge itself inside your rectum. There’s nothing more embarrassing than a trip to the emergency room to have someone fish whatever you got in there out of you bum.

If you’re the least bit competent as a woodworker you could fashion something pleasurable from a hardwood, like maple or oak. The do-it-yourself craftsman will be able to make the exact size he needs and wants. He’ll take pride in sanding, buffing and curing his creation with olive oil before use.

No woodturning tools? Not to worry. A trip to the local Homo Depot may be the answer. Look for wooden dowels. They come in many widths and lengths. Since doweling is often made of a softer wood, the dildo craftsman will be able to round off the top of the dowel using a rasp with relative ease. But because the wood is soft, he’ll have to seal his creation in a smooth varathane or polyurethane finish. Never, ever insert uncured or unfinished wood. Besides the danger of splinters, untreated wood is very porous and you’ll never get the damned thing clean after the first use.

Another word of caution; some people are allergic to various materials or polishes. So test all materials first.

Here’s a dildo-making project just about anyone can do. Make your own beanie baby dildo. You will need several latex condoms, water based lube and whole dried beans or peas. Take a condom fill it with the dried beans and/or peas and tie off the end. Coat the condom with lube and slip it into another condom and tie that one off too. If you want to be super-safe, add a third condom. The beauty part of using dried peas or beans is that, should the condoms break while you’re pleasuring yourself and you lose some of the contents in your love cave, you’ll be able to eliminate them with ease with your next bowel movement. And there’s nothing toxic in dried beans!

But what if you want something more stiff? Building a dildo out of modeling clay might be the answer. You can find this material at your local crafts store. You can be very creative with the shape and size. You’ll also be able to flare the end of the thing so there won’t be a worry of it getting past your sphincter. Before the clay dries, consider pressing dried beans into the shaft for some added texture. Once your new phallus is completely dry you can finish it with a polyurethane seal. However, I encourage you to use a condom over your newly created cock substitute. Even with a sealed dildo like this one.

Name: Heidi & Werner
Gender: couple
Age: 32 & 34
Location: Arizona
My husband and I have been married for 12 years, we love each other very much. About five years into our marriage, while on a retreat for couples, we discovered we are both bisexual. As a consequence we gave each other permission to explore our same-sex interests. For the most part this has worked out really well. At this point in our marriage, however, we’d like to move beyond the casual semi-furtive affairs we’ve been having and embrace polyamory. Problem is we don’t know any other people who are living in successful polyamorous relationships. Is polyamory a viable option even for a few lucky souls?

Congratulations on living a successful marriage, especially since you guys are taking such a non-traditional approach. That can’t be easy. I wish there was a way the two you could bottle whatever it is that you apparently have in spades that allows you to make such an honest assessment of yourselves and your marriage. You must be remarkable people. I’m so glad that you took the time to write.

As a matter of fact, I know a bunch of very successful, long-lasting polyamorous relationships. Most are comprised of people already on the sexual fringe — queer folk, currant and former swingers and kinksters. However, they all tend to keep the dimensions of their relationships relatively private. It takes a lot of psychic energy to live polyamorously, exponentially more than in a traditional marriage. This tends to leave less psychic energy for flying in the face of the popular culture. Of course the down side of this is there are, as you suggest, few good public role models for polyamory.

Connecting with other like-minded people is less of a challenge these days than in years past thanks to the marvels of the internets, don’t cha know. And being bisexuals, as you are, my make things even easier. I suppose you know this already, but for those in my audience who don’t, polyamory is not the same thing as swinging. Swinging is more about recreational or sport sex; partners having consensual casual sex with others, either other couples or individuals. Swinging is also generally a heterosexual phenomenon. Female bisexual behavior is allowed and even encouraged. The same cannot be said about male bisexual behavior. This seems like an unfortunate double standard to me, but in this respect swinging reflects traditional sexual mores.

Polyamory, on the other hand, connotes more of an emotional bond, a relationship that exceeds pure sport fucking. But not surprisingly many polyamorous relationships evolve from more casual swinger connections. So let’s not knock that.

If you both are seriously into polyamory you’ll have an easier time of it too. The downfall of many budding polyamorists has to do with the reservations one or another in the couple may have about the lifestyle. The one with reservations may play along for a while thinking that this new venture will grow on him/her, but it doesn’t. Some folks are monogamous and it’s breed in the bone. Others are non-monogamous, equally breed in the bone. Trying to convert one or the other to an alternative way of thinking is simply not gonna happen.

The big bugaboo in any type of relationship will be jealousy. You guys seem to have avoided that poison, and again congratulations. The couples retreat you mentioned my have provided you the communication tools you needed to open yourselves to one another in an honest and forthright way. These communication skills will be particularly useful in forming polyamorous relationships too. Whatever the configuration of your future relationships, all parties must allow for and invite an honest and open exchange about passions, desires and needs. And from time to time each individual in the polyamorous relationship will prioritize these things differently. Expect lots of diversity. For more about this see my friend, polyamorous proDOM, Mistress Matisse’s column HERE!

There’s no “one way” to be polyamorous. Some people express their polyamory by having one primary partnership with one or more satellite relationships. They prefer monogamy with one partner but have an open relationship with others. Some polyamorists live in triads or loosely structured groups. Some people express their polyamory by having all partners and lovers as part of an extended family— raising kids together and taking care of elders together. Strong polyamorous relationships carried a number of my closest friends through the worst of the AIDS crisis in the mid 80’s. While you guys seem pretty clear on what you want for yourselves, you may want to be on the lookout for potential partners with incompatible passions needs and desires.

As we all know, a big part of effective communication in a relationship is exploring and expressing feelings. Another part, one that is often overlooked, is the art of negotiation. How do partners and lovers negotiate for what they need and want? “I want to try something new with someone new.” “My lover and I need some private time.” Mature people are flexible, but they also have healthy boundaries. Giving your partner the freedom to share him/herself intimately with others as he/she desires is easier when it is based on the guidelines that you and your partner agree to first. Of course these will need to be readjusted from time to time as new situations evolve.

A secret to successful polyamory is working to maintain a strong primary partnership, in your case, with each other. The more comfortable and secure you guys are with one another, the easier it will be for you to free one another up for others. When the primary relationship is healthy and safe, the polyamorous relationship will add to the support structure, not diminishes it.

Interestingly enough, not all polyamorous relationships are sexual in nature. For example, one person in the group relationship may have a sexual connection with another, while that person enjoys a platonic relationship with that someone else.

One thing for certain, you guys will have to decide what sort of people will be positive additions to your lives. And that will entail a good deal of trial and error. Like my daddy always used to say, “ya gotta walk through a lot of manure before you find the pony.” Remember not everyone who aspires to polyamory is capable of it, nor is everyone one who is capable of being polyamorous suited to be with everyone else who is.

For more about this timely topic I refer you to the two podcasts I did with the insanely marvelous Cunning Minx of PolyWeekly. Look for them HERE and HERE!

Good luck ya’ll

3rd Anniversary Show — Podcast #185 — 02/15/10

Hey sex fans,

Holy cow, it’s another milestone, sex fans!  This week’s show marks my third anniversary of podcasting.  I know!  Isn’t that fuckin great?  I mean who would have guessed that we’d have such a long run. And what a year it has been too.  I launched two podcast series last year — the Sex EDGE-U-cation series and the SEX WISDOM series, both of which appear on Wednesdays.  The Erotic Mind podcast series, which is nearly two years old, continues to shares Mondays with my traditional Q&A podcasts like today’s show. As usual, I have a very hot load of oh so stimulating questions to start year #4 off with a bang.  And I have a feeling that a few close friends will drop by to say howdy too.

  • Jesse wants to know if he can test dirty from swallowing a meth-head’s nut.
  • Terri has yet to cum.
  • Mariah is a cock in a frock, but he wants to quit.
  • Miguel can’t keep it up.
  • Andrew is keeping all his hot monkey love to himself.
  • Some chick from Boston wants to know about boners and butt sex.

BE THERE, OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail. Got a question? Perhaps you have a comment. Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you just wanna talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give dr dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll fine me in the podcast section, obviously, or just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

I wanna take a moment to remind you to check out another great website in the Dr Dick family of sites. It’s my new PRODUCT REVIEW site — drdicksextoyreviews.com

That’s right, sex fans, now it’s so easy to see what hot and what’s not in the world of adult products. I review of all kinds of adult related goodies — sex toys for sure, but also condoms, lubes, herbal products, fetish gear as well as educational and enrichment videos. DON’T MISS A SINGLE ONE!

Look for the drdicksextoyreviews.com. You’ll be so glad you did.

Today’s Podcast is bought to you by: Eden Fantasys.

Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store

ELBOW GREASE, Part 1

Hey sex fans,

It’s product review Friday!

Not only do we welcome a new manufacturer today, ELBOW GREASE, we have a new Dr Dick Review Crew member to introduce.

Please join me in welcoming Jack Cascade. Read about his personal journey as a single man living a year without sex HERE!  He hastens to add that masturbation is allowed and encouraged.

ELBOW GREASE Light —— $4.75

[editors note:  I want to say a word about the ELBOW GREASE company’s background.  It was founded back in 1979, long before the onset of the AIDS crisis and thus the pressing need for condoms.  So these folks were one of the pioneers of the personal lube phenomenon.  Back then, gay men were more likely to use Crisco as a lubricant for their intense fuck sessions.  This became a huge problem, because Crisco, if not stored properly, would go rancid in time.  And when it did, you, your partner(s), your sheets and your bedroom would stink like week old french-fries.  Trust me, it wasn’t pleasant.  Happily, Elbow Grease Original Cream put an end to that annoying sexual faux pas when it exploded onto the market.  Finally, we had an alternative to a vat of smelly vegetable shortening rotting under the bed.  ELBOW GREASE is greaseless and odorless, but still thick and creamy.  It revolutionized the way we had partnered sex as well as simply jerkin off.  Without further ado here’s Jack.]

Jack Cascade*
For review purposes, the Elbow Grease people sent us a 1 oz container of their ELBOW GREASE Light.

I must admit that I’m not a big fan of mineral-based cream lubricants. If it’s thick and creamy, I just feel like it belongs on my face. Before you get any brilliant visual images, I’m talking about Noxzema. My mother uses it religiously on her own face. Though she swears by it, I never adopted the habit. Needless to say, the association of mom when I pop open a canister of creamy lube is dis-engorging to say the least. Furthermore, why lather on a thick cream, unless there’s a fun way to get it off. Now forget about mom and visualize that facial you were thinking about before.

I may have to start a new devotion to ELBOW GREASE Light formula. One liberal application to your cock and I bet you won’t last as long as the lubricant. Silly me, I tried this creamy stuff on a latex condom suited toy without much luck. They just don’t seem to be made for each other. And guess what? Actually they’re not. Who reads labels before taking the plunge? Not me!
Full Review HERE
ELBOW GREASE Hot —— $4.75

Jack Cascade*
The promotional claim reads: ELBOW GREASE Hot Cream is of the same thick consistency as the Original formula but, it heats up! The Hot formula is a mineral oil-based, warming, thick cream lubricant. It stands beside its Original brother as the oldest warming cream formula on the market today. The warming agent in our formula is menthol.

For review purposes, the long-established Elbow Grease people sent us a 1 oz container of their ELBOW GREASE Hot.


I want to know who the hell thought it’d be a good idea to promote the sensation of burning to a throbbing cock. Some sadist, perhaps? For most men out there, the thought of heat and burning anywhere near our precious penis is enough to shut down the erector set and make us want to put the toys away. The fact that the active ingredient to create the “warming” sensation in ELBOW GREASE Hot is menthol seems to be quite the misnomer.

Whatever brilliant mind came up with this marketing mistake needs to be shot at dawn. Whatever happened to menthol being associated with sensations of fresh and, I don’t know, cool? The real benefit of ELBOW GREASE Hot has yet to be marketed. However, I’m pretty proud that I was able to find some enjoyable uses for this stuff. First off, forget about using it to jack off or to fuck with.

The real titillation comes when you apply a liberal amount, rub in, wait a couple of minutes while the menthol works its magic. Ok, ok so it does work on your dick. But the second time I used ELBOW GREASE Hot lubricant, I slathered it on my balls and perineum, then waited a bit. Within minutes, an intense tingling, COOLING sensation (some may consider this a warming sensation) had my cock harder than before. However, I kept it off my shaft. Here’s the key to using this product: don’t be afraid to experiment.
Full Review HERE

ENJOY!

IN THE MOOD

Hey Sex Fans!

We came dangerously close to having a fantastic Sex EDGE-U-cation podcast for ya today.  Unfortunately, my scheduled guest had technical difficulties and we had to put off the interview till next week.  Such is life!

In lieu of a podcast, we have some swell Q&A.

Name: Brian
Gender:
Age: 40
Location: Canada
After a guy ejaculates can he have another ejaculation? Like after I cum if I put on a cock ring will it stay hard enough to continue with intercourse and achieve another orgasm? I basically want to cum twice in a row.

Yep, that’s doable.  All depends on your particular refractory period and how turned on you are.  Let’s take a quick look at the male sexual response cycle again, just so we understand what we’re talkin’ about.  Ok?

The sexual response cycle refers to the sequence of physiological changes that occur as we become sexually aroused and move through to afterglow. The sexual response cycle has four phases: excitement, plateau, orgasm and resolution. Both women and men experience these phases of course, although the timing usually is very different for each gender.  In addition, the intensity of the response and the time spent in each phase will vary from person to person and from situation to situation. That’s why I say cuming twice in a row is doable.  But is it gonna happen for you?  I guess we’ll just have to wait and see, huh?

Ok, Phase 1: Excitement (or the boner stage)

  1. Muscle tension increases.
  2. Heart rate quickens and breathing accelerates.
  3. Our skin may become flushed particularly on our chest and back).
  4. Our nipples may become erect.
  5. Blood flow to the genitals increases, thus the boner.
  6. Our balls swell, our sack tightens, and we may drip precum.  Mmmm, precum!

Phase 2: Plateau (or the strokin’ or pumpin’ stage)

  1. Everything in phase 1 intensifies.
  2. Our balls may pull up into body cavity.
  3. Our breathing, heart rate and blood pressure increase.
  4. Our toes curl, face contorts and hands clench.

Phase 3: Orgasm (or the “yabba dabba doo” stage)

  1. Involuntary muscle contractions begin.
  2. Blood pressure, heart rate and breathing excelerate.
  3. There’s a rapid intake of oxygen.
  4. Muscles in the feet spasm.
  5. There is a sudden, forceful release of sexual tension.
  6. Rhythmic contractions of the muscles at the base of our cock result in the ejaculation of spunk.
  7. A “sex flush” may appear all over our body.

Phase 4: Resolution (or the “I need a nappy” stage)

  1. During this phase, the body slowly returns to its normal level of functioning, and the parts of your body that swelled and engorged return to their previous size and color.
  2. This phase is marked by a general sense of well-being, enhanced intimacy and, often, fatigue.
  3. Most women are capable of a rapid return to the orgasm phase with further sexual stimulation and may experience multiple orgasms.

Men, on the other hand need recovery time after orgasm, this period is called the refractory period.  This doesn’t have to be the end of sex.  Like you suggest, a cockring may prevent your dick from going soft.  But don’t count on an immediate second ejaculation, even if your dick stays hard. Don’t forget, the duration of the refractory period varies and is situational.  It will also increase as we age.

Name: Ivan
Gender: Male
Age: 33
Location: Spain
I am considering the social usage of Viagra or Cialis to improve sexual performance. Which of the two would you recommend for recreational usage?

I don’t recommend recreational use of prescription drugs, particularly these vascular dilators.  And certainly not when used in conjunction with other non-prescription drugs.  Maybe you ought consider a low-tech solution like a cockring instead.

I hasten to add that I’m not averse to using some drugs recreationally.  But I think that we’d do well to stick to those that are more natural.  The less processing involved and fewer added chemicals the better, in my humble opinion.

Did you know that health officials in the UK and here in the US are investigating reports of blindness among men using Viagra and Cialis?  Why risk that if ya don’t have to.

I’m really concerned with the alarming rise in recreational use of these drugs by younger men, men in their 20’s and 30’s.  And like I said, this is even more troubling when they combine these drugs with ecstasy, cocaine, or crystal meth.  If your young body is having difficulty producing an erection at this tender age, then you need medical attention ASAP.

Besides the risk of blindness, there are several other reasons why you ought not abuse Viagra or a similar drug just so you can have wood that lasts for hours.  Your body will habituate itself to the substance and, in time, you won’t be able to get it up at all without ever increasing doses of these drugs.  This will surely fuck up your cardiovascular system big time.  In fact, you may very well be inducing the very sexual dysfunction the drug is supposed to help.

Consider the person who overuses eye drops or lip balm or any other otherwise innocuous over the counter health and beauty products.  Their bodies stop making the natural substances that these products are intended to assist.  It’s counterproductive and it’s ill advised.  And if this is a problem with relatively harmless over the counter products, you know you are playing with fire when you abuse powerful prescription meds.

Name: Yuri
Gender: male
Age: 20
Location: Russia
I want to make love kisses on my girlfriend’s vagina.  But I never did this.  What can I do?

Love kisses on her vagina, huh? You Russians are so romantique!

I think you are talkin about some good old fashioned cunnilingus, right?  Or as we say here in the US or A — eatin’ out at the Y, munchin’ carpet, muff divin’, pussy lappin’ and what have you.

If your girlfriend is as unfamiliar with gettin’ love kisses on her vagina as you are at givin’ them, you might want to give her a head’s up on what you plan to do.  Ya see some of our women folk are none too keen on the idea.  They have it in their head that their pussy is icky and not for oral consumption.  This is very unfortunate, but it is what it is.  If you think you’re gonna get a lot of resistance from your lady friend, you might start kissing her on the face and neck, then to the tops of her tits, her nipples, and her belly.  This will give her an idea where you’re headin’.  If you’re doin’ this right, hopefully she’ll be so busy enjoying herself she’ll not protest your trip south.

Proceed slowly. Make sure you’re you’re both comfortable. If you’re lying down, you best be on your stomach between her legs so that your string of kisses is as effortless as possible. Have a pillow ready to shove under her hips to raise her a bit if she’s willing to proceed.  If, by the time you get to her pussy, she doesn’t try to stop you, you’re home free.  Basically she is giving you tacit permission to proceed.  Of course you could check in with her and ask if you can continue.  But sometimes, in delicate situations like this, you may be better off keeping the conversation to a minimum.  She might be fine with it if she doesn’t actually have to agree to it.  Women are like that sometimes.

Try scooting her butt to the side of the bed while you kneel on the floor between her legs. This will give you all the access you’ll need.  And hey, don’t go divin’ right in there, for heaven’s sakes.  Take a moment to two to admire the beautiful spectacle before you.  Lordy, lordy ain’t that a sight for sore eyes.

Gently nuzzle, kiss, and lick her inner thighs and the area around her vulva.  With a little luck your gal-pal will be so aroused she’ll begin to guide your head into her snatch.  Lick her outer lips. Run your tongue up and down them. Nibble them gently with your lips. Next, work your tongue in between the outer lips to caress her smaller, thinner inner lips.  Circle her vaginal opening and perhaps dart your tongue inside her cunt.

I hope you know your way around a woman’s genitals, because If you don’t you’ll be bumbling around down there to no great effect.  And, while you may get an “A” for effort, you might very well wreck the moment by being too aggressive on her more sensitive parts.  Her clit is her magic button.  If you don’t know a clit from a hole in your head, do some research before you head south.

Approach her clit very slowly and gently.  Some women enjoy a tongue lashing directly on her clit. Others find direct contact too intense, even uncomfortable. Now is a good time to check in with her.  Ask for direction on how she wants you to proceed.  She may prefer you to circle her clit with your tongue, avoiding direct contact.

If your gal is unfamiliar with this kind of pleasure, she may not  kow to direct you.  If that’s the case, you’re gonna have to ask direct questions like:  Do you want it lighter? Or would you like more pressure? More of this?  Not so much of that?  Soon you will be able to tell on your own by observing her pelvic movements and listening to her moan if you’re doing a good job.  Sometimes the best communication is non-verbal.

While you’re down there, why not employ a couple fingers to spread things apart?  Add a little massage.  Use the tip of your tongue, then the flat of your tongue, then your lips as you move around her vulva.  All three feel a little different and each provide subtly different sensations.  Some chicks love pussy raspberries, you know…

Come up for air from time to time.  Look into here eyes, caress and massage her boobs.  Try slipping a finger or two into her mouth so she can suck them while you’re licking her. Or move into a 69 position and enjoy a little blowjob with you’re eating her out.

You may want to incorporate some ass play too.  Insert a lubed finger into her butt hole.  Just make sure that whatever goes in her ass doesn’t then come in contact with her cunt.  You definitely don’t want to introduce bacteria that can cause a urinary infection.

Good luck ya’ll

Do You Hear What I Hear?

Hey sex fans!

We’re back with our very last word in sex toy reviews for 2009.  This is WEEK 6 of our Holiday Gift Giving Guide; and we close out the year with a Toys for Gals feature.

This week we will hear from Review Crew members: Joy, Gina and your truly, Dr Dick.

First up is one of two Doc Johnson toys we have today.

Love Connection —— $24.33

Joy
My partner, Dixie, and I each got a Doc Johnson toy to review.  Dixie posted her Wish-Bone Vibe review two weeks ago.  I got the equally cute, Love Connection to Love Connectionreview.

This sweet little multi-speed vibe is actually two vibes in one.  There are two different silicone attachments that you screw on to the hard plastic base.  I’ve used other vibes that offered attachments, but I was disappointed to discover that I couldn’t count on the attachment staying in place during use.  The Love Connection is different.  The two attachments actually screw on to the handle, so there’s no chance the thing will come off when you’re using it.

But the best thing about this little wonder is that it’s waterproof.  There’s nothing that satisfies like a vibe in the bath.  There is a one touch fingertip control button on the base of the handle that allows you to cycle through the three speeds.  This is not a powerhouse vibe, but you wouldn’t expect it to be, being such a cute little thing.  But it gets the job done.

This would make the ideal vibe for travel.  It’s discreet, and it’s quiet.  The Love Connection runs on 2 AAA batteries.  Unfortunately, they are not included in the package.
FULL REVIEW HERE

Next we see about the other Doc Johnson toy

Lucid Dream No. 14 —— $21.99

Gina
My last review of the year is, sadly, a bust. Can’t win them all, I guess.Sex_Toys_DJ092602

Here is a classic example of how a toy looks so amazing in the package, only to have it let you down outside of the package. Lucid Dream No. 14 has an amazing shape. It has a bulbous angled head on a gooseneck body. It’s a jelly material in a luscious tangerine color. And it’s transparent; so you can see the sizable vibe in the head. I was confident this was going to be a brilliant G-spot vibe for sure.

Taking it out of the minimal, but stylish package produced the first concern I had. It emanated a very unpleasant chemical smell. This off-gas was really off-putting. And the smell got on my hands just from taking it out of the package. ICK!

I quickly washed the Lucid Dream and my hands with soap and water. I had immediate misgivings about using this vibe on my body, but I though I’d better press on with my review. I figured I could always slip a condom on it if I was going to have it come in contact with skin.

The next problem I encountered was battery placement. Lucid Dream calls for 2 AA-batteries, which are not included in the package. That was a bummer, but I got over it. Figuring out how the batteries fit into the battery compartment was a puzzle. Nothing I saw on the vibe itself showed the battery placement technique. There were no instructions in the package either. I swear I tried the batteries every which way and thought; maybe this was a defective toy. Then as I was opening the battery compartment to switch out the batteries one last time; the thing sprang to life.

Apparently, you have to close the battery compartment just so; any deviation from that, even tightening the cap a tiny little bit rendered the toy useless. The batteries weren’t making contact with the terminals correctly.

A dial in the vibe’s base activates the multi-speed vibrator in the head of Lucid Dream. This is one of those rheostat things. Not a bad concept when executed correctly. Again, unfortunately, this is not one of those times. The dial is way to lose for it to be effective. In order for this to work, there should be some resistance in the dial as one moves it up or down. This dial had no such resistance.

I have to admit, the vibe was quiet, but it also wasn’t very powerful, even on the highest speed. After all the trouble I had this Lucid Dream I didn’t even bother to try and pleasure myself with it. You know, life is just too short for a bad vibe.
FULL REVIEW HERE

Finally, we reprise my review of an amazing product.

The Cone —— $129.00

Dr Dick
Guess what, sex fans? I am the proud owner of my very own The Cone.  And oh jeez, my life is never gonna be the same.

I am now the envy of all my friends — both the male and female variety — since the hot pink pyramid shaped package arrived on my doorstep. (Actually the hot pink pyramid shaped package arrived encased in a nondescript brown cardboard box, but you get the idea, right?)

I purposely left the shocking pink cone shaped object sitting nonchalantly on my desk The Conefor the past 10 days. Without fail it caught the eye of everyone who passed through Dr Dick’s office/salon/café/crash pad. “What the hell is that?” You’re kidding!” Really? “Get outta here!” “Oh My God, can I try it?” And so it went day after day.

I fond myself repeating the mantra — “It’s an innovative sex toy! – It’s pop art! – It’s my new BFF! — It’s three things in one!”

My hat is off to the developers of this unique unisex toy. You can tell right away that the folks who created this little wonder have a profound appreciation for sexual pleasure, as well as a joyful sense of playful fun. This kind of synergy can and apparently does turn the sex toy industry on its head. Bravo!

Ok, so what exactly is The Cone? Primarily, it is a hands-free battery-operated vibrator, don’t cha know. And that, sex fans, allows you to be pretty gal-darn creative in how you use the bugger. In fact, its unique design practically begs you to come up with clever new use or two every time you use it. I know of what I speak! I came up with one really good one. But I’m getting a little ahead of myself.

It has a sixteen-function 3000-rpm gold brush motor. It is both powerful and quiet. (Believe me, once you have at this thing, you will be making all the noise, not it.) It has a soft high-quality pink silicone skin. Its about seven inches in diameter at the base, five inches high, and weighs just over a pound. It has two push button controls. Simply put, there is nothing discreet about it, folks! Everything about it screams: “I’m here. I’m pink. Get used to it!

The Cone requires 3 “C” batteries. Unfortunately, the first set of batteries is not included in the package. I tell you this because I don’t want you to get all bummed out when you whip it out, for the first time, hoping to hop on for a ride only to discover you don’t have the proper batteries on hand.

Even though this isn’t an insertable device (That is, unless your hole looks like the Arc de Triomphe in Paris.), you’ll want to use a good personal lube to keep The Cone‘s silicone skin from chafing your naughty parts. Just make sure you use a non-silicone lube though, or you’ll ruin the blasted thing.

Like I said, The Cone has sixteen different vibrating programs — from mild to “Whoa Nelly! I suggest you take your time and cycle through the different vibe patterns to find the ones you like best. Here’s a tip: the on/off switch doubles as an ‘Instant Orgasm’ button, which revs the thing up to fever pitch in an instant. This is apparently for all those folks out there who are just too damned busy to cum like a normal person.

For the uninitiated, the pointy cone shape may be intimidating. But relax there’s no need to worry; The Cone’s peak is soft and spongy. It’s sorta the consistency of a very stiff dick. You can sit on this baby, lean on it, lie on it or plop it in your lap. You can use it alone, or with a partner. Just don’t be surprised if your partner tries to monopolize The Cone. If you have girl parts, The Cone is ideal for your pussy, clit and taint (perineum). If you have boy parts, The Cone is perfect for your cock, balls and taint. And everyone’s asshole will sing for joy when The Cone comes knockin’ at the back door.

The Cone‘s silicone skin is nonporous, which means bacteria cannot penetrate it. That makes it a breeze to clean. Just wipe it down with a mild soap and warm water after each use. To sterilize — remove the silicone skin from the unit and swish it in boiling water for a couple of minutes. Of course when you replace the skin, ya gotta realign it on the unit properly or you will not be able to find the operating buttons. But whatever you do, don’t immerse The Cone itself in water.

Ok, so The Cone is decidedly pricey. I’ll grant you that. But you know this thing is gonna last. And I’m a firm believer in buyin’ quality right from the get-go. In fact, if we consumers only patronized conscientious manufacturers of quality products, like The Cone; there’d be a lot less crap in the marketplace.
FULL REVIEW HERE

ENJOY