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All that glitters

Hey sex fans!

It’s the black Friday edition of Product Review Friday! And we turn again to Zini for today’s pleasure product.  I believe this marks our seventh review from their line. You are following these reviews, right? If not, I suggest that you do. You can find all our reviews by going to drdicksextoyreviews.com, use the search function in the sidebar and type in “Zini.”

Today we have a vibe designed for women. Here is Dr Dick Review Crew member, Christa, for the lowdown.

Zini ROAE —— $135.99

Christa
I loves me some high-end sex toys. They always make me feel so elegant, and that’s a pretty hard thing to do because I ain’t elegant at all. In fact, I’m kind of a schlub. Don’t get me wrong, just because a vibe is expensive doesn’t make it good. I’ve learned that the hard way.zini_roae_black_gold_size

I know you’ve seen the stuff I’m talking about; stuff that comes in gussied up packaging with fancy-schmancy logos. Stuff that looks so promising, but turns out to be a big fat dud. I hate when that happens. My time on the Dr Dick Review crew has helped me become a little less dazzled with the externals, like packaging and shit like that, and withhold judgment till I get my hot little hands on the thing and put it through its paces. Because, like they say, not everything that glitters is gold.

This gets me to my Zini ROAE, which, curiously enough, is black and gold. BTW, it comes in other color combinations too. Now when I see a vibe doin’ the whole gold thing, I say to my self, “Whoa! Are you trying to dazzle me? ‘Cuz if you are, I’m way ahead of you, buddy.”

So what is the ROAE, you may be asking. Well I’ll tell ya. It is indeed an attractive internal/external vibe, a highly stylized rabbit design if you will, that is supposed to stimulates your G-spot and clit at the same time. It has dual motors and it is covered in luxurious latex-free, nonporous, phthalate-free, and hypoallergenic silicone. It is beautiful to the touch. It’s also rechargeable, via a USB cable, which is the only way to go nowadays. If you’re still buying battery-operated toys, I don’t even know what to say to you, except GET WITH IT!

zini_roae_gspot_vibrator-02-lrgI was sad to learn that the ROAE is not waterproof. That’s a bummer. I expect all high-end vibes to be waterproof, don’t you?. This spashproof nonsense has got to stop, if ya ask me.

Here’s the thing about the ROAE; it’s a really great design, but it seems like the designers just blew off the recharge port cover. It’s made of this really flimsy plastic that could easily snap off. Had they made it so the port cover was sturdier and created a watertight seal, like their SEED vibe, all would be well.  I mean, why in the world would a company go to all the expense of making something as good as ROAE, but skimp in this very important detail? It’s beyond me.

Anyone who has used one of these internal/external vibes, and there are dozens and dozens of them out there, will know that one size does not fit all. All of us gals have a slightly different genital configuration. Sure everything is in approximately the same place—clit is here, G-spot there—but our uniqueness will either make of break a vibe design for each of us. What works for you may not work for me. I gave up hope long ago that I would ever find precisely the right configuration of an internal/external design to pleasure both my G-spot and clit at the same time. I guess I’m just built weird. But that doesn’t diminish the effectiveness of the ROAE. I don’t mind rocking it back and forth—a little G-spot stimulation, then some more clit stimulation. To tell you the truth, I’m not all that enamored with my G-spot. For me it’s all about my clit. When I jill-off I rarely insert anything into my vagina. I don’t use the ROAE, or any such vibe, internally, even if the designer says that’s how it’s supposed to be used. I’ll be the judge of that, if ya don’t mind. The tip of the ROAE is real good for clit stimulation too and it provides a different sensation than the flat head pad, at the other end of the vibe, the side that is “supposed” to be the clit stimulator.zini_roae_gspot_vibrator-03-lrg

The ROAE delivers a kind of diffuse stimulation, even at its most intense. I chalk this up to the silicone skin. I suspect it mutes a lot of the vibrations. This isn’t a bad thing, especially for women new to vibration. But if you are one of those gals that needs a vibrator that is so intense you need to kick-start it, this vibe will disappoint. The ROAE is remarkably quiet too.

I like the three-button control panel, which is easy to use and understand. The “+” button turns on the vibe and accelerates the speed through its five speeds. The “-” button decelerates the speed and turns off the vibe. The round button between the other two rotates through the 15 pulsation modes.

Remember only water-based lube with a velvety silicone toy like this.

Now to the issue of clean up. Because the ROAE isn’t waterproof you can’t clean it as well as you might like. Submerging a toy for deep cleaning is optimum, but there’s no submerging this guy. There is an obvious seam between the gold plastic in the handle and the silicone skin. I discovered that I needed to use an old toothbrush, along with the warm water and mild soap, to make sure this area is clean. The owner’s manual says you can’t use chemical or alcohol-based cleaners on it. WHAT? I don’t know why this is so because every other silicone toy I know of doesn’t exclude these types of cleaners. Whatever, this pretty much eliminates the possibility of sanitizing it for sharing. That’s another huge bummer because my butt-boy BF, Alex, sure enough wanted to use this toy in his ass. He reminded me that all G-spot vibes also work on P-spots. “Yeah, Alex, I know. You tell me that every time I get a G-spot vibe to review. I may just wind up giving it to him and forgo using it ever again myself. ;-(

zini-roae-black-gold-boxed-1-850x850I want to call attention to the packaging; it’s signature Zini all the way. It’s elegant without being ostentatious and it’s recyclable.

I was torn about a recommendation. On the one hand, the ROAE has a beautiful stylistic design; it’s made of silicone, and it’s rechargeable. On the other hand, there is the spashproof, not waterproof, issue, which has implications in terms of cleaning and sanitizing. For the longest time I struggled with this. I had to ask myself, could I wholeheartedly recommend a super pricy vibe that has such glaring problems? In the end, the answer was, sadly no.
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

Seedling

Hey sex fans!

It’s Product Review Friday! This week we continue with more of the Zini product line. You are following these reviews, right? If not, I suggest that you do because we have been mighty impressed with what we have discovered so far. You can find all our reviews by going to drdicksextoyreviews.com, use the search function in the sidebar and type in “Zini.”

Today we have a mini vibe that is designed to enhance solo as well as couple play. Here is Dr Dick Review Crew member, Jada, to tell us all about it.

Zini Seed —— $99.99

Jada
I finally got a crack at one of the Zini toys. Luckily there are so many different products in their amazing line. I’m here to tell you about the Zini Seed. A curious name for a personal vibe, don’t you think? Well that’s what I thought too until I saw it for the first time. It looks like an exotic seedpod.product_seed_01

The Zini Seed is very petite, not even 4.5” long and just 1.25” wide. It’s available in three color combinations; mine is violet and black. It’s designed to deliver pinpoint stimulation where you want it — clit, nipples, you name it. It’s fits comfortably in your hand, which make it easy to direct the vibrations right where you want them to be. And best of all, it is rechargeable and waterproof.

I love it! It’s such a sweet little thing.

It’s so unobtrusive, that my husband welcomes it in our couple play. He likes to use it on me and he even turns it on himself from time to time. He chuckles as the buzzy vibrations, delivered to his penis through the soft and velvety silicone tip, tickle his fancy. Because the Seed is so diminutive, you shouldn’t expect it to have the same kind of rumbling vibrations a much larger vibe might deliver.

product_seed_04I love that we can laugh during our sex play. It wasn’t always like this. When we were first married I was so uptight and he was so macho. Our sex life was a chore. Being part of the Dr Dick Review Crew has brought us both out of our shell. When I started to bring home toys and other products, my husband wasn’t sure how he felt about it all. Happily, he now appreciates how enriching most have been to our sex life. He has come a long way and so have I. Now when I hear other women complain that their sex life is all work and no play I turn these women on to the reviews gathered here. I’m certain that this has saved more than one marriage.

First thing out of the box you’ll need to fully charge the Seed. It took me approximately 2 hours to fully charge, which provided me approximately 3 hours of use. The control panel lights up when charging and it changes color, from red to blue, when fully charged. The package I received had two types of recharging cables, one wall plug, albeit for a European outlet, and one USB cable. Obviously, I used the USB cable. The cable connects to the vibe via a port in its base. The port is then sealed by a plug, which creates a waterproof seal. I love that the Seed is waterproof. I know from reading some of the other Zini reviews that not all their product line is waterproof, so I’m so glad that mine is.

The three-button control panel is easy to use and understand. The “+” button turns on the vibe and accelerates the speed through its five settings. The “-” button decelerates the speed and turns off the vibe. The round button between the other two rotates through the 10 pulsation modes. Every press of the button makes the Zini Seed flash a different color. And it is remarkably quiet. One thing, and this isn’t a problem really, but because the Seed is so small the whole unit vibrates, although the silicone encased tip delivers the most intense and spot-on vibration. There is also a travel lock feature.

Because the business end of the Seed is hypoallergenic, latex free, non-porous, and phthalate-free silicone, you’ll need to use a water-based lube with it. As you probably know, a silicone-based lube would mar the surface of the vibe. At the same time, because the Seed is silicone and waterproof, cleaning it couldn’t be easier. Mild soap and warm water does just fine for everyday cleaning. But you can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution to sanitize for sharing. And it should be shared!product_seed_06

The beautiful black presentation box is worthy of note. It is very elegant and it would make a fantastic gift even without further wrapping. All the packaging is recyclable. Zini clearly has an ecological conscience. The Seed lies nestled beneath a plastic bubble in a compartment just under the lid of the box. Now swing that compartment to the side and you will find another compartment containing the user manual, recharging cable, and a sweet storage pouch big enough for both the vibe and the cable. It’s really quite lovely.

Full Review HERE!

ENJOY!

The Yin and Yang

Hey sex fans!

It’s Product Review Friday! This week we feature yet another product from the creative minds at Zini.  I sure hope you are following these reviews because we’ve been thrilled by what has come our way so far. You can find all our reviews by going to drdicksextoyreviews.com, use the search function in the sidebar and type in “Zini.” Today we have a toy designed for couples. Alas, while I see this product offered on several online sites, I don’t see it available here in the good ol’ US of A, in fact, no where in North America. What a pity!

Here are Dr Dick Review Crew members, Ken & Denise, to tell us what’s on their mind.

Zini Duex —— $100+

Ken & Denise
Ken: “We have a great, new, award-winning product to tell you about today, but Denise and I are totally bummed that, despite our great review, only she and I have one, And you, if you live here in the United States, won’t be able to find one here.”zini-deux
Denise: “That’s right, I feel bad about telling you how much we liked the Zini Duex because it’s like…how does that old saying go…counting your money in front of the poor. That’s just cruel. Well maybe our review will help get the Zini line available, at least online, here in North America.”
Ken: “This is what we can tell you about the Zini Duex. It’s actually two vibes. The brilliant couple-oriented design invites playfulness and experimentation. And when I say couple, I don’t mean simply a male/female couple. And it is just as effective for solo play too. The super lightweight egg shape comes apart to offer two contoured Yin/Yang vibes. Magnets hold the egg together.”
Denise: “I found that the Zini Duex is best as part of foreplay, mainly because, as Ken just mentioned, it’s super playful. And isn’t that what is often missing in foreplay? I also love that it is rechargeable. Both of the Yin/Yang vibes recharge via a port on its bottom. A plastic plug covers the recharge port. But the plug does not create a waterproof seal, so sadly we couldn’t play with the Zini Duex in the bath. Oh, and there’s only one recharge cord per unit, which means you have to recharge each half of the egg separately. It’s no big deal, but it means twice the recharge time.”zini-deux-293x300
Ken: “The Zini Duex is made of ABS plastic, which is latex-free, nonporous, and phthalate-free. There’s a hard shell with a velvety inside. The ergonomic shape of each half of the egg fit beautifully in your hand and against your body cupping and cradling. A two-hour charge delivers four hours of pleasure. The indicator lights in both control panels alight when charging, changing color to indicate a full charge. The three-button controller is easy to use; there are five speeds and five vibration modes.”
Denise: “The vibrations are tingly and not particularly powerful. But then again, as I already mentioned, it’s best used to get yourself and your partner warmed up.”
Ken: “The convex (female) half of the toy has a sculptured bump designed to stimulate her clit, and carry the vibrations carry down the flared wings to stimulate her labia. The concave (male) half of the toy is designed to cup his balls while the pointy end stimulates his taint (perineum) or cockhead. But don’t stop there.  Think of all the other erogenous zones on your, or your partner’s body.”
Denise: “While you can’t submerge Zini Duex for cleaning, mild soap and warm water with a lint-free towel does just fine for everyday cleaning. But you can also wipe it down with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution to sanitize.”en_deux_01_02
Ken: “I generally leave the discussion of the packaging to Denise, but I want to weigh in on this packaging. That’s because it’s so cool. It comes in an elegantly designed gift box. The vibe sits proudly under a plastic shield. The top of the box swings out from the base revealing the charger, user manual and chic drawstring storage/travel pouch.”
Denise: “It is a beautiful presentation, I must say. Apparently, this is signature Zini because everyone else on the Review Crew is making similar comments. And speaking of travel pouch, the Zini Duex is designed with a travel lock.”
Ken: “A word or two about the three button control panel. There’s a +, -, and O button. Press the + button to turn the toy on and escalate the vibrations, the – button reduces the intensity of the vibration, and O button changes the pulsation pattern. Getting the hang of the Zini Duex and putting it through its paces is part of the fun. And get this; if you place your half of the toy near your partner’s half, both halves pulsate to the same rhythm even if only one side was activated.”
Denise: “I found that if I used a couple of drops of lubricant on the velvety inside it made the Zini Duex slide more comfortably over my body. We used both water-based and silicone-based lube. My favorite is the silicone based.”
Ken: “We’re both super stoked about the Zini Duex. Everything about it — design, packaging, and performance impressed us. We both highly recommend it to you. It would make a great holiday gift too.”
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

Awakenings

And now for something completely different. I’d like to welcome my friend and colleague, Vivian Slaughter, who has some interesting things to say about becoming the brilliant young sexologist she is today.

Becoming a feminist was a big deal for me; in high school I was very anti-feminist, I was the Cool Girl, I didn’t like doing my hair and felt giddy when people told me I “wasn’t like other girls” (the today me would have snapped back: “What’s wrong with other girls? Who are these mythic other girls you speak of?”) I would smile cruelly at people when they used the term, laugh a wide-open mouthed, high-pitched laugh. “No,” I’d correct them. “I don’t hate men!” Then, I’d usually follow with something like, “I’m not a feminist, but I believe (in something that literally fits the definition of being a feminist).”

Vivian SlaughterWhen I packed up and moved further South for college I found myself drawn to a sexual health education group that presented interactive workshops on sexual assault, dating violence and enthusiastic consent. This was a sex positivity group. This was a feminist group. It was a hard transition, and my first term with my new colleagues left a bitter taste in my mouth. What was happening to me? I’d come home from our meetings and rant to my roommate. “Ugh, it’s like…I agree with everything they say but do we have to call ourselves feminists? No one is going to take us seriously!”

I hate to say that I had an epiphany – because besides sounding cliché, it also mitigates the months of mental anguish and cultural upheaval I went through – but one night while I was walking home from a workshop late at night someone who had sat in the audience approached me.

“Uh, hey,” he said, running up behind and motioning with his arm that he wanted me to stop. “Can I tell you something?” I nodded, looking around to see if any of my group mates were around, I was used to being approached after workshops and asked disgusting, personal questions. Back up from my mates would have helped me feel safe. “I’m not a bad person,” the guy continued, “but I’ve done a lot of bad things. But I never knew they were bad. I didn’t know there was anything wrong with everything that I was doing, the way I acted. Thank you for coming tonight. Thank you for making me realize that I was wrong, and that I was behaving like a turd, and that feminist isn’t a dirty word.”

Me! He thought I was a feminist? I wanted to correct him – “I’m not a feminist, but I could see how you think that! I just believe that men and women should be treated equally, and that we have in place long standing and deeply rooted infrastructure that puts women at a systematic disadvantage – but! Whoa? Feminist?”

I realized then that I was a feminist, that I had been duped into believing falsehoods about the word, the movement, the people who identified as such. I realized in the dark, smiling up at this stranger whose name I never knew but who had credited me with changing his mind, that I was a feminist and it felt good and I was going to help people realize they were too. We changed each other’s mind.sex-positive-feminism

Almost immediately after that night I started working at an adult store. I was a sex positive feminist! I annoyed all my co-workers by asking all our guests their preferred personal pronouns; I put cards up on our counter with the information for a local crisis line; a local doctor who specialized in working with survivors of sexual assault. Couples would shyly slink into my shop and I would joyously greet them, stretch my arms to embrace them, help them pick out a pair of pink handcuffs, a soft whip made of braided silk, crotchless panties. “I love helping people love sex!” I would think to myself, naively thinking that all the world’s problems would be solved if only we used the word sex more openly.

Then one day a woman came into my shop, her face red from tears and her bangs matted to her temple from sweat. “What can I help you with?” I inquired.

“I don’t like having sex,” she began, her words coming out in short gasps. “I don’t like having sex,” she repeated, looking at everything around her, taking it all in. “My boyfriend says there’s something wrong with me because I hate it and can’t orgasm, and that you need to fix me.” She fixated on me, her eyes angry but her bottom lip trembling. “Can you fix me, please?”

I didn’t know what to do, didn’t even know how to begin. Telling her that sex was natural and fun wasn’t what she needed to hear, because I knew that’s what she had always been told. “What do you mean you don’t like sex?” so many people had gasped at her. “You must be prude. You must not have been fucked properly. You must be weird. You must not know what you’re talking about.” I found myself getting angry imaging all the horrible things this woman had been told, I found myself angry because I thought I was open minded and didn’t know what to do.

sex+positive“There is nothing wrong with you,” I spat out, sounding angrier than I wished. “Please, I’m so sorry… there is nothing wrong with you, but there is something wrong with your boyfriend. You don’t deserve what he dished out, you don’t have to like anything you don’t want to like. I’m so sorry.”

A few days later a pimply faced young man approached me in the shop, pointed to a book on the shelf. “Will that tell me where the clit is? I don’t know where it is, I’m afraid my girlfriend will laugh at me if I ask her where it is, but how should I know? Like, what, I’m supposed to know everything about fucking?”

“I hate giving blow jobs,” an older man confided in me, a stack of DVDs in his hand and an empty shopping basket sitting at his feet. “I hate having to swallow, but if I spit they all think I’m being a baby. Can you give me something that makes it bearable? I don’t know, that would numb my throat or make it taste okay? Just something to make it less awful.”

Learning what it meant to be sex positive was even harder than learning to embrace the word feminist.

I had been lead to believe it meant just liking sex, liking sex a lot, and not being shamed of it. Sex positivity was a young, pretty face flashing small, white teeth and nodding enthusiastically at whatever you suggested: “Sure!”

I learned while crying with a stranger telling me she hated sex, sitting on the floor explaining to a red faced 18 year old what a vagina looked like, and holding a man’s hand in front of a movie that featured Jesse Jane in her first girl on girl scene that sex positivity meant more than liking sex; it meant not liking sex, it meant having boundaries, being able to say “no,” not being coerced into trying things (“You have to try it just once, come on!”), being respected. Sex positivity meant having a kink. Trying a new kink. Saying no to a kink. Saying yes! Saying no – don’t stop, our safe word is barnacle! Saying no.

I realized that as an educator I had failed.sex positivity

I began asking around at workshops; asking my co-workers, classmates, hallmates, wondering earnestly what “sex positivity” meant to them. Some were confused: “Uhh, being positive… about sex?” Others were excited to share with me what sex positivity meant for them, how it fit into their lives. I found everyone’s answers – so varied and all across the board – interesting, but in the end what stuck with me the most were the people who were “sex positivity” critical. “What does it mean?” one person sneered to me. “It means people feel better about sexualizing my body; it means people call me a slut when I’m at the bars and they look at me like I should be empowered by it.”

When I left school, I knew I wanted to stay in the field of sexual health education, but I didn’t know what that meant for me. Continue working on crisis lines? Go back to school? Explore a degree more centralized to education? Throughout my last term I pensively reflected on my four years and wondered what I should do next.

I remembered vividly all the people I helped in my shop, all the questions asked during workshops. I realized I wanted to continue reaching out to people on a personal basis and learn more from them. Feminism, sex positivity, kink positivity and LGBTQIA+ rights have been trending topics in the last few years, and I’m interested in exploring the aftermath of what some are calling our new sex positive culture.

And so it is: I come home from work and in the few hours before I leave the house again to pick up my partner (we both go to work at noon, he gets home close to 13 hours later, so it’s safe to say that we have both become the human equivalent of an owl) I sit at my desk and I write. I write about the experiences I’ve had over the last few years, the stories shared with me and how they’ve helped me grow. I conduct interviews, via phone or e-mail, with a wide array of personalities, all with the intention of sharing the unique perspectives passed on to me.

We all have our mark left on us from the culture we grew up in. What I want to know is: what impact has this life had on you? I reach out to you all and ask that you share your story with me, the story of what feminism and sex positivity (or: sex negativity) means to you, the impact it has had on your life and the mark it has left.

I would appreciate hearing from you. We all have stories to share, and my favorite thing to do is listen. Below is a link to my website, which explains more about my background in education, my goals in reaching out to community members, as well as outside links to my personal blog.

vivslaughter14.wix.com/sexpositivity

Take care,
Vivian

Tricks Of The Trade — Part 1

A friend of mine, who is writing a book about male sexuality for women, asked me if I could be her go-to-guy for a bunch of questions she had about pleasuring a man which she wants to include in her book. I think it is only fair that you, my loyal audience, should get this information before anyone else does.

What would, in your esteemed opinion, be your five hot tips for giving a great hand job?

First, there are 10, not 5. Hand jobs are too important for just 5.

Most men love a good old-fashioned hand job. Here’s the deal with a lot of us folks who own a dick. We first become acquainted with the pleasure our cock can offer through handling ourselves. And when it comes right down to it, there is rarely a mouth, pussy or ass that can compete with the variety of stroke and firmness of grip that a hand can provide. Simply stated, the humble hand job is the ideal way to pleasure your man. Just remember, even though jerkin off your guy isn’t particularly exotic, as far as sex acts go, it never has to be boring for you or him.busy masturbating

1) I am of the mind that a brilliant wank begins with a first class lube. Many guys swear by silicone-based lubes for this purpose, but a hand job connoisseur will probably have his very own favorite. Start off with just enough lube to make things slick, you don’t want to over do it. Get a feel for his johnson and what you have to work with. Skillfully draw back the skin of his rod toward the root of his dick till it is taut. This is much easier to do on uncut men, but even most cut men will have some skin left for move.

2) Tell your dude how much you like his meat. A hand job is a perfect time to marvel at the work of art before you. Feel free to uooh and ahhh a lot. Your man will get off on you admiring his unit. For, as we all know, a hard man is good to find. Can you wrap your fingers around the base of his unit and get a good grip there? If not, you’ll want to consider a cockring for this purpose. if you use a cockring, you’ll free up both your hands for what’s to come.

3) Now that you got yourself a really nice boner goin’, get between his legs. Take his cock between the palms of your hands, interlock your fingers and guide your hands up and down his shaft. Your thumbs should be on the underside of his dick, so that on each stroke up and down, you hit his frenulum with the pads of your thumb. Now with his cock still between your palms, rub your hands together, like if you were warming them. This will provide a great new sensation for your guy.

cock,schlong, dong4) Hold his cock in one hand and with the well-lubed palm of your other hand, slowly move it in nice lazy circles all over his dickhead. This is a particularly delicate procedure, especially if your man is uncut. His dickhead will be super sensitive, now that he is fully aroused. And don’t forget, if you are using a cockring, his pecker will be even more engorged than usual, making it hypersensitive. Be sure to ask for feedback on this move. If he finds this too uncomfortable, move on to something more pleasurable. Here’s a tip: us men being who we are will, no doubt, already be giving you directions on what to do and how to do it down there. So all you have to do is follow his lead. Remember, he knows his way around his joint better than anyone.

5) Don’t forget to service his nuts. Since a guy’s jewels are less sensitive to touch than his dickhead, you can manhandle them a lot more. Squeeze and tug and even gently slap those babies to your heart’s delight. While you are doing that, and with his dick flat against his belly, shimmy the heel of your hand up and down the underside of his cock. You see how you are incorporating different sensations and movements all at the same time? Keep this up and your man will be putty in your hands, no pun intended.

6) Interlace your fingers and make a tight passageway through the palms of your hands. Pump up and down his shaft this way. As you get to the top of his cock close the passageway even tighter. Then make him squeeze his way in as you slide back down to the bottom. Then with one hand rapidly following the other in only a downward stroke, make like a perpetual penetration tunnel. This will make his eyes roll back in his head in ecstasy.titty fuck01

(This might be a good time to incorporate other parts of your body besides your hands. Most men get off on a titty –fuck. Cozy his cock between your boobs and have him hump away. You can also use your feet in the same fashion. Lots of guys can really get off fuckin’ a chick’s (or dude’s) feet.)

7) Now, back to the hand job. Rhythmically stroke only his rod. Watch as his dickhead swells and turns red or even purple. Once it’s bright red, use your fingertips on the tip of his dick like you are turning a doorknob, first to the right, then to the left. Lightly at first, but slowly increase the pressure till he begs you to stop. Now you got him right where you want him.

8) Here’s where things can get really interesting. When he’s least expecting it, move one of your hands down past his nuts and taint. You know what a taint is, don’t cha? That’s the patch of skin between his balls and his asshole. It got its name from taint ass and taint balls, ya get it? Anyhow, once past his taint you’ll find his rosebud. With a well-lubed finger massage his pucker. If this is virgin territory for your man, he’s in for the thrill of his life. Continue to stroke both his cock and asshole. Don’t be afraid to try and push your fingertip past his sphincter. If he lets you inside, you will have access to his prostate. But even if he doesn’t, massaging the outside of his hole will bring him very close to an explosive conclusion.

9) If you’re ready to finish him off, so to speak, pick up the pace of your stroke. He will be breathing heavily now and he’ll look down over his chest at the miracle happening between his legs. Tell him to throw his legs in the air and spread them as far apart as possible. This will add considerably to the muscle tension that you’ve already built up. And a thunderous orgasm is all about muscle tension.

Now bring this puppy home. Lick his balls, finger his hole and beat his meat. Insist that he keeps his feet in he air and his legs splayed. Momentarily, he will begin to quake with building mini-orgasms. He will no doubt try to buck himself to conclusion, but don’t let him. For the moment you’re in charge down here, not him. Tease him one last time as he nears ejaculation. When he’s almost there, suddenly stop what you’re doing. This will, of course, drive him crazy. And don’t resume your stroking till he begs for it.

It will probably only take a few more strokes before he gives up the spunk. Keep your face, or at least your eyes, out of the way, because when he finally blows it will be explosive. If you’ve toyed with him for any length of time, you will have built up quite a load and it will shoot in spurts till he is empty.

10) His cock will be hypersensitive after he cums, so be gentle.

 

ANAL PLEASURE AND THE PROSTATE

1. “Male G-Spot” clarification — we’ve heard the prostate referred to as the “male G-spot,” but we’ve also heard the frenulum given the same name. Which is it? Or is this term not appropriate for either one?cake & sodomy

Male G-Spot more appropriately denotes the prostate, definitely not the frenulum. However, let’s be grown up about this and skip the unnecessary comparison between the G-Spot and anything in the male anatomy. Because that’s like saying a clit is a female penis. If we must use shorthand for the prostate, try P-Spot.

2. How should a woman go about finding and petting the prostate?

  • First, trim your fingernails and file them smooth. And before you start playing with a man’s hole have him relax.
  • Take a relaxing shower, a warm bath, and/or try some deep breathing exercises will help him do that.
    Have a ready supply of a water-based lube handy. Silicone-based lubes are swell for these exercises too. However, this type of lube isn’t recommended for use with a condom.
  • Start with a nice hand job. Stroke his dick with your lubed hand to get him into his happy place.
  • Gradually slather some of that lube on to his balls and taint. While his legs are open find his hole and play with his rosebud. Gently massage the area around his asshole, but don’t side your fingers in just yet. Simply let him get used to the feelings of playing at the opening of your ass.
  • Let your play include the tip of your finger entering your ass.
    If you do this while you’re stroking his cock, you will find that his hole will actually open and invite your finger. That’s the great thing about pleasuring one part of your body while learning to pleasure another.
  • Once he’s comfortable with your fingertip inside, try pushing it in further and move it around a little. Try pushing it and pulling it out of his ass. Ya know, like finger-fucking your man.
  • About an inch or so inside your man’s ass, move your finger in an upward motion along the wall of his rectum. You’ll discover a round bulb of tissue the size of a walnut — this is his prostate.
  • It shouldn’t be hard to find, particularly if your man is all horned up. It will feel smooth and hard, like a flat stone.
  • Give that puppy a nice gentle massage with your fingertip. If you’re still stroking his wood, don’t be surprised if this prostate massage gets him off. In fact, you will find that his prostate actually enlarges a bit and becomes more firm just as he is about to shoot.
  • As he cums you will also notice that his sphincter muscle will tighten around your finger and pulsate with each squirt.

3. What’s the best position to put the guy in to do this?

body as art5821Your man should be on his back, while you face him between his open legs. This gives you access to cock, balls and asshole.

4. Should a girl be worried about hurting her lover while playing with his prostate?

If you go slow and are gentle, there’s nothing to be concerned with. Don’t forget to ask for feedback. And if you want to know what he is feeling, finger your hole first.

5. In your experience as a sex therapist, do you find that straight men are wary of letting their female partners explore anal play?

Oh yeah, big time! Straight guy have it in their head that ass play is gay. I always respond that would be true if only the gays had prostates.

6. If so, how would you advise a woman to address or overcome any homophobic paranoia her partner might have in regards to anal play?

This is a very delicate issue. The best a woman can do is invite him to experience the new sensations. Anything more than that can backfire. If she is too insistent, or tries to shame him into it, the guy’s fears will quickly become a phobia.

7. In your experience, is male vulnerability a factor in anal play, and if so, is there anything a woman should do or say to psychologically care for her lover?

Oh yeah! Like I said above, ass play is often associated with gay sex. The best thing a woman can do is watch some hot butt sex porn with her man, where the dude is on the receiving end of things. These are called pegging vids. Then there are How To Videos like TRISTAN TAORMINO’S EXPERT GUIDE TO ANAL PLEASURE FOR MEN.  Check out Dr Dick’s How To Video Library for loads more titles.

Look for PART 2 of this series on Friday, October 10th.

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