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Eating Out at the Y: The Finer Points of Cunnilingus

Many women prefer oral sex to intercourse, because it has the potential to give them exceptional orgasms. And for those of you who need loads of direct clit contact to get off, mouth-to-clit stimulation is one of the easiest, most enjoyable ways to get make that happen. Unfortunately, for many gals, like Carol here, her man’s oral skills simply aren’t up to the task.

I like oral sex, but my new BF doesn’t know what he’s doing down there. He’s really sweet and I like him a lot. Unfortunately, he thinks he this really great lover when actually he sucks…and not in a good way. I know he reads your column, he was the one that turned me on to your site, so could you give him some pointers on how to orally pleasure a woman? He doesn’t listen to me.

Now, despite being a big fat homo, I am regularly quizzed on the art of muff diving. I’m always happy to oblige, but I’m bound to say that everything I know about cunnilingus I’ve learned from my lesbian friends. Instead of me—who has no pussy—pontificating on the joys of orally pleasuring a woman, I turn to my #1 friend of the lesbian persuasion, Joy. Not only does she have her very own pussy, she also knows her way around other pussies as well.

I shared Carol’s letter with her, and asked for her thoughts. I figure, if you wanna learn how to do something right, ya talk to a pro. Simply put, no one sucks cock as good as a queer; no one gobbles clam like a dyke. Enough said! Joy’s first comment was…and I quote, “What’s this chick doin’ with a dude? If she wants good head, she should bed a dyke. Once you go lezzie, you never go back.” Ahhh, Joy is such a joy!

Okay, so giving oral is about the most perfect sexual thing you can do for a woman. It makes her feel special. What woman doesn’t groove on knowin’ her partner finds her finger-lickin’ good? And maybe that’s a good place to start this tutorial. If you don’t like the taste or smell of pussy, give up on the idea that you’ll be a fabulous lover. However, if you want to give this whole muff diving thing a try, but you don’t know if you can handle the flavor or aroma, or if your chick’s unsure about you being down there, thinking she might be unsavory; you could start off by showering or bathing together.

The novice pussy lapper would do well to approach this amazing piece of human anatomy very gently…at first. If the woman you’re eatin’ out wants more vigorous attention, she will ask for it. So relax and enjoy! (Note: If all this licking and sucking isn’t a turn on for you, it won’t be much of a pleasure for your partner, either. So, if your heart’s not in it, you will have to find other ways to please her.)

Don’t make the mistake that Carol’s boyfriend makes. Listen to the feedback you’re getting on the job you’re doing. If you’re not getting any, ask for it. (Just don’t talk with your mouth full.) Once you hit on something that works for your gal, stick with it for a while—unless of course, you’re trying to drive her wild with some tongue teasing.

Joy says that the biggest no-no in pussy divin’ is divin’ in without knowing your way around. Like I always say, ladies, it’s completely up to you to introduce your partner to your particular pussy. Remember: Just because he’s been with other women, don’t make him an expert on your parts. Get it? Got it? GOOD!

Finding just the right position will eliminate the fatigue factor and neck strain. Have her lie across the bed (or the sofa, kitchen table, whatnot shelf) with her ass situated just at the edge. With her legs apart, knees up and her feet resting on the edge of the bed/table/whatever, take a comfortable position on the floor between her legs. Here’s a tip: The more muscle control she has to exert to maintain her position and balance will often lead to a stronger, more pleasurable and intense orgasm, because a thunderous orgasm is all about muscle tension.

Joy insists that a soft tongue and a relaxed jaw work best. And holy cow, she knows of what she speaks. She always starts out licking her pal from vaginal entrance up to her clit. She follows the outer edges of her pussy along both sides. Slowly at first, then more rapidly. Sometimes she’ll even throw in some raspberries. (You know, the vibrating sound you make when you force breath through lightly closed lips.) Joy stands by this technique, don’t cha know! Sounds like so much fun, I kinda’ wish I had me a cunt.

Don’t let your hands be idle when you’re yodeling up the valley. Gently press the two outer vaginal lips together, then run your tongue between the inner and outer labia one side at a time. Try poking your tongue into her vagina. The majority of a woman’s vaginal nerve endings are around the opening and within the first couple of inner inches. Target them with a darting tongue motion. Insert a hardened tongue into her hole. Try moving your tongue in and out, as well as in circles around the inside of her opening.

Spread her outer vaginal lips with your fingers. With your tongue pointed, gently flick your tongue around her clit. Feel free to roam around in there, but keep coming back to her clit, because it is the most sensitive area—just like your dick head, you dickhead! Be careful though: some women find the direct approach too intense. If this is the case with your woman, blow a stream of warm breath over and around the clit. This lighter, breathy touch might do the trick.

Keep your tongue and hands busy flicking and massaging, poking and prodding lapping and kneading. In other words, find out what she likes and how she likes it, and let her have it just that way. Again, be sure to ask for feedback—and then do precisely what she says.

Once your partner is good and hot and juicy wet, Joy suggests you kick things up a notch. Spread her lips, expose her clit and give it a quick little suck. If this hits the spot, you might want to lightly pull back her clitoral hood and repeat the quick sucking motion. Joy assures me that this feels incredible, and it’s just the thing to do if you feel like driving your partner crazy with ecstasy. Now take her exposed clit into your mouth and gently suck on it, simultaneously flicking your tongue over and around it. This combined with fingering her hole will usually produce a stunning orgasm.

Finally, Joy suggests you surprise the little woman by having a sugar-free mint or an ice chip in your mouth while you eat her out. These can create a very intense tingling sensation and will enhance your performance—and her pleasure—immeasurably.

Good luck!

Tease and Tickle

Hey sex fans!

It’s not just a Friday; it’s a Product Review Friday. And today we bring you a review of another product that comes to us from our favorite retailer — Adult Sex Toys .com.

Here to tell us all about her new vibrator is Dr Dick Review Crew member, Jada.

Crystal Chic Wand — $36.45

Jada

You’ve probably noticed that the Dr Dick Review Crew has had a number of wand type massagers to review lately. All of them have been a variation on the granddaddy of wand massagers, the Hitachi. All have that distinctive bulbous head on a sturdy shaft. This classic wand shape is turned on its head with today’s offering, the Crystal Chic Wand.

There is nothing bulbous or bulky about this dandy. In fact, it is on the other end of that spectrum. It’s slim and sleek. It has comfortable to hold handle, a bendable shaft made up of gradually smaller beads and it’s topped of by a glorified bullet vibe. It’s 11.5” long, but only 7″ of that is the bendable beaded section. By the way, it’s just the tip of the Crystal Chic Wand that vibrates.

The three-speed controller, basically just a single button, is in the base of the handle. The handle is also studded with six crystals (rhinestones?). It’s also waterproof. The entire thing has a lovely velvety feel to it and it is easy to grip even with lubed fingers. It operates on one AA battery (not included).

I was completely under whelmed at first sight. The Crystal Chic Wand comes in a cheesy plastic package that is decidedly un-GREEN. I was all prepared to not like this thing, but I gave it a go anyhow. Sure glad I did, because I liked it immediately. Once out of its ugly packaging I discovered that the Crystal Chic Wand is really fun and versatile. I admit; my first impressions were totally wrong.

You can use the Crystal Chic Wand either internally or externally. I have a preference for external; it’s just the thing on my clit. I did try it as a G-spot vibe and that worked too. What’s great about it internally is that it’s not bulky, so you can pinpoint the vibration precisely where you want it. I tried to talk my husband into trying it as a prostate massager. The vibrating tip is no wider than my index finger. But he declined; he’s not ready for even a little butt play yet. That was disappointing, because I know he’d enjoy it. So you see what I mean when I called the Crystal Chic Wand versatile.

I want to call your attention to the bendable feature, because this was my favorite part. You can shape it however you want and it will hold that shape. BRILLIANT! The battery compartment in the handle is easy to open and close. Just remember to tighten it securely to keep the Crystal Chic Wand waterproof. I used the vibe for over 6 hours on just one battery, which is pretty amazing. If I have one complaint it’s that it’s not very quiet, particularly on the medium and high speeds.
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

It’s Only Natural!

Hey sex fans,

It’s Product Review Friday again and we have two more Intimate Organics products  to tell you about. I say “more”, because we reviewed one of their other products a couple of weeks ago. You can find that review HERE!

This week’s reviews come to you by way of Dr Dick Review Crew members Denise and Karen.

Intimate Organics Intense – clitoral gel —— $15.60

Karen
I thought to myself: Oh goodie, Intimate Organics Intense clitoral gel sounds simply delightful. I can’t wait to give it a whirl. Alas, once I did, I found that it didn’t live up to my, perhaps inflated, expectations.

Allow me to explain. It appears the Intimate Organics people and I have a completely different take on what the word “intense” means. When I think “intense” I think WOW, totally awesome! Intimate Organics Intense didn’t even come close to WOW or awesome. That’s not to say it didn’t work at all; it did. It’s just that it was mild, not wild.

Now, I’m the first one to acknowledge that every woman’s naughty bits are different from every other woman’s naughty bits. A woman’s response to a product like Intimate Organics Intense will be very subjective. What is thrilling to one may not be all that exciting to another. So how this clitoral gel panned out for me may not predict your experience.

Intimate Organics Intense is a clear gel, easy to use and it isn’t runny. I am totally stoked that this product is certified paraben-free, pure vegan and DEA-free. In fact, I couldn’t be more pleased in this regard. I’ll choose an organic product over an alternative every time.

I’m guessing the active ingredient in Intimate Organics Intense is the peppermint oil. It has a slight peppermint taste and the warming/stimulating/cooling effect is probably due to that too. I just wished they had kicked it up a notch.

I used Intimate Organics Intense on myself first. Than Jack and I used it together. I used it on my clit and I dabbed it on my nipples. There was an increase in sensations, but like I said there was nothing intense about it.

It works best when you apply it and then wait about 2 minutes and will last for about 10 minutes or so.
Full Review HERE!

Defense Protection Lubricant —— $8.78

Denise
Before I started to use Defense Protection Lubricant I thought I’d better do a little background check. You see, we’ve reviewed dozens of lubes on this site, but this is the first one that suggested it protects. But protects what, or protects against what; was my question.

This is what I discovered. Defense Protection Lubricant contains both caarrageean (sea kelp) and guava bark, an anti-bacterial extract. Apparently there are studies that show carrageenan inhibits the virus (HPV) that cause cervical cancer and genital warts. Guava bark has been traditionally used as a douche to treat and prevent yeast infections. I really think this is a great idea. I just hope that folks don’t get the wrong impression and think that use of Defense Protection Lubricant is a sufficient means of protecting oneself from all STIs.

I also want to point out that carrageenan is a vegan alternative to gelatin.

Defense Protection Lubricant is a light, water-based, glycerin-free, propylene glycol-free, condom friendly lubricant. All of these fine GREEN attributes make this lube worthy of your serious consideration. If I have one quarrel with the product it is that Defense Protection Lubricant dries out very quickly. It doesn’t get sticky, mind you, but it does dry out. Ken and I found that we needed to reapply several times even before we got to the main fucking event.
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

Finessing That Ass Fuck — A Tutorial For a Top

This tutorial is for anyone who is considering being a top, regardless of whether the meat injection is 100% prime, or a beef substitute (a strap-on dildo), these words of wisdom are for you.

What Ya Need To Know

Let’s get something clear right from the get-go. And this is for all you sticklers for semantics out there. The word “top” has several sexual connotations. There are of course BDSM tops, but generally they go by the moniker “dom”. And one can accurately say there a “top” in any sexual activity that involves an active and passive partner — such as cocksucking and watersports. But today’s lesson is for the active partner in butt sex. But you knew that already. Because all you had to do is read the title of this article to figure that out, huh?

Some folks just aren’t open to the idea of experimenting with their assholes. They think it’s gonna be painful, or worse, messy.

So first off, prospective tops, you don’t want to try buggering these folks. A good top should know it makes no sense at all to try to force or belittle an unwilling bottom to give up his or her rosebud. This is simply a waste of everyone’s time. Because if you do succeed in getting the unwilling bottom to relent, and the subsequent fucking attempt confirms the bottom’s earlier suspicions that this activity is indeed painful or gross or both, you’ll have won the skirmish, but lost the war. Remember, it takes two to tango.

Secondly. Before a top commences a fuck of any kind, they need to consider whose pleasure is primary in this particular fuck. There is a big difference between fucking for the top’s pleasure, for the bottom’s pleasure, or for mutual pleasure. For instance, if a top is trying to finesse a novice bottom into exploring ass fucking, that top needs to concentrate on the bottom’s pleasure first.

Start by getting the bottom comfortable being touched where the sun don’t shine. Lubricate your hand generously and massage the outside of their hole. Make some lazy little circles with your fingers and drive your bottom wild with desire. When their sphincter starts to quiver, as it surely will, slowly penetrate your bottom’s bottom with a lubricated fingertip. After a few minutes of just hanging out with your finger in there, you can begin to slowly slide your finger in and out. Be sure to take your time. Allow their muscles to adjust to being penetrated. You might want to incorporate a thin vibrating dildo and/or some expert rimming to pave the way for bigger things.

When a top fingers a bottom, they would do well, at this point, to reconsider the width of his dick or her strap-on. Once your bottom can take two fingers comfortably and three fingers with a minimum of discomfort, they’re ready to take a modest-sized cock or dildo. If you’re very well-endowed or you plan to strap on a monster dildo, you’d better adjust this finger-formula based on the width of your fingers and your equipment. And, you know, make sure your partner is aware of the girth of what awaits him or her.

A clean asshole is a fuckable asshole. Hygiene is essential for both tops and bottoms. Bottoms may wish to use a small bulb syringe and plain water to clean out a few hours before the event. And tops, once your cock or dildo has been inside your bottom’s ass, don’t go puttin’ that thang anywhere else until you’ve washed it down with soap and water. Carelessness in the hygiene department will only invite a very serious infection.

Making It Happen

Tops, be sure to use a good personal lube and have your favorite condoms within reach. Getting your bottom into the right position, one that is comfortable for both of you is paramount. There are way too many positions for me cover here, but when choosing a position, consider your preference, the bottom’s preference, your cock and/or dildo size, your body type and the bottom’s body type. You may find that a pillow or two positioned under your bottom’s pelvis will help support and prop up your bottom’s bottom in most positions.

Painful fucking is a sign that something is being done incorrectly. It is not a sign from God that ass fucking is wrong. In most cases, pain is due to a few predictable factors:

  • The bottom is too tense and is tightening up.
  • The top is being impatient and is pushing too hard too soon.
  • There may not be enough lubricant.
  • The cock or strap-on is too big for the bottom’s experience level.

Obviously, both people should be comfortable and feel pleasure from it. However, it’s perfectly fine, on occasion, to concentrate on one person’s pleasure over the pleasure of the other. Just make sure you both agree on whose pleasure is gonna be the focus of any given fuck.

Topping is a skill like any other. Practice will improve your technique. And while practicing, invite and listen to the feedback coming from your bottom.

The Top’s Handy-Dandy Tally Sheet

Ok, let’s review.

  1. Always use a lubricant. Both water-based and silicone- based lubricants are latex-compatible and highly recommended.
  2. Stop immediately if your partner asks you to stop. I’m not suggesting that you stop trying altogether; just don’t push yourself onto your bottom when he or she wants you to stop. Find the source of the problem—lubrication, position, whatever, resolve the problem, and resume the fuck.
  3. Take it slow. There is no need to rush, especially if you’re experimenting with anal sex for the first time.
  4. A bottom’s desire to be fucked will not insure pleasurable cornholing. It’s nice that he or she might want to surrender their ass, but that’s not gonna make it happen on its own.
  5. Always communicate with your bottom. Keep your communication playful and dirty. Tops, be open about what you want and how it’s feeling. “Oh baby, that’s right you’ve got such a tight hole. You want my big meat in your ass? Yes you do! Open up for daddy…or momma…as the case may be.” Get the picture?
  6. Spread the pleasure around. Keep your hands busy on the bottom’s clit or cock, at least initially. If the bottom can make the connection between the pleasure he/she is familiar with (cock or clit) with the new butt related sensations; then the battle has been won.

In Conclusion

Some experienced bottoms can orgasm with ass fucking alone. Women do so through pelvic muscle contractions and G-spot stimulation; men because of pressure applied to their prostate.

Oh, and here’s something you need to know. We all have two sphincter muscles. If you insert a finger about one half-inch into your ass and press your fingertip against the side you’ll find them both. There is less than a quarter-inch between them. The external sphincter is controlled by the central nervous system, which means you can tense and relax this sphincter at will. The internal sphincter is quite different. This muscle is controlled by the autonomic nervous system making it involuntary. This muscle responds to fear and anxiety. It may cause your bottom’s hole to tense up automatically even if he or she is trying to relax.

Tops, remember the rectum is not straight. After the short anal canal that connects the asshole to the rectum, the rectum tilts toward the front of the body, sometimes as much as 90 degrees. That’s way some people are anatomically less suited to ass fucking.

Finally, the best attribute a top can have is his or her sense of humor about the whole friggin’ deal. Fucking ain’t as easy as it looks, at least not at first. But perseverance will carry the day.

Good luck!

Big, Bad Orgasm Machine

Hey sex fans!

It’s not just a Friday; it’s a Product Review Friday. And today we bring you a review of another wand-like massager. This product comes from our favorite retailer — Adult Sex Toys .com.

Here to tell us all about her new vibrator is Dr Dick Review Crew member, Christa.

Adam & Eve Rechargeable Magic Massager 2.0 —— $57.49

Christa
When I was like 17 I had my first orgasm and I did it with my aunt’s Hitachi Magic Wand. I wasn’t actually aiming for an orgasm, on the contrary. I had this splitting headache, that kind I would regularly get with PMS. I was staying with my aunt at the time and she handed me her Hitachi and suggested that I massage the back of my head and neck with it.

My aunt was this totally cool lady, so unlike my mother. When she handed me the vibe she gave me a little wink and closed the bedroom door as she left the room. I thought nothing of it at the time, but I soon discovered that moving the powerful massaging head from the back of my head to the side of my head and then to the back of my neck really helped alleviate my headache. I guess I just figured that if the massager felt this good on the upper part of my body, maybe it would help with my cramping. I gingerly moved the vibe along my torso. My nipples immediately sprang to life. As I moved it south the most pleasant sensations began to well up in me. Just for the hell of it I gingerly dragged the bulbous head of the Hitachi over my cunt. I was still wearing my jeans, but still I’d never felt anything like that before. Before I knew it, I’d discovered my clit and the rest is history.

Once I emerged from the bedroom and handed the Hitachi back to my aunt, and thanked her. I knew from her smile that she knew what I now knew. I loved and trusted that woman so much, In this regard; she was much more a mother to me than my own mother. Yet we never spoke about what had just happened to me.

Ya know what just kills me though? I can’t understand why one generation of women can’t just come right out with it and tell the next generation of women the secret of getting off. Wouldn’t we do one another a great service if we did? This coy winking and nodding that happens between women, if it happens at all, is just bullshit, if ya ask me.

Well, that was more of a story then I anticipated telling, but it feels good to say that out loud.

All of this is a preface to my review of the Rechargeable Magic Massager from Adam & Eve. This thing rocks! It is every bit as powerful as my trusty Hitachi, but it is cordless. And that, my friends, makes it revolutionary.

I’m not gonna go on and on about a wand-type massager, like the Rechargeable Magic Massager, because if you are older than 18 and are still clueless about this type of vibe, then there’s just no hope for you. However, if you’re a younger woman, just discovering your sexuality, then you should immediately get yourself a wand massager. And I can recommend the Rechargeable Magic Massager with confidence.

There are several advantages of the Rechargeable Magic Massager, over the original Hitachi. This one weighs less than the original and it, as I said already, is cordless. The lighter weight Rechargeable Magic Massager will prevent wrist strain when jilling off. And it being cordless allows you to diddle yourself wherever you damn well please.

When my BF, Alex, and I hit the road for a little R&R, the first thing I pack is my Rechargeable Magic Massager.
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY