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REVIEW #27

Hey sex fans,

Holy mackerel!  It’s Week 3 of our Holiday Extravaganza.  Did you somehow miss Week 1 or 2 of this lollapalooza?  Shame on you!  Check out Reviews #25 and 26.  You’ll be so glad ya did.

The Dr Dick Review Crew has our review apparatus workin’ overtime.  We want to get as many reviews out there before the end of the year.  Because we certainly don’t want to leave you hanging…as it were.  This week, we have yet another hot juicy load of swell holiday gift giving ideas for you.  And guess what?  They are all GREEN.

This week’s Review Crew include:

  • Jack & Karen — Reviews #17, 18, 25
  • Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18, 23
  • Me, Dr Dick — Reviews #1 – 5, 7 – 10, 12, 14, 15, 19, 21, 25, 26
  • Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18, 23. 24
  • Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23, 24

First up we have two brilliant wooden insertables from my very good friends at Jildos; The Art You Love To Touch! Jildos are American made, hand-crafted works of art.  They are produced by a company called: WoodPeckers Roost.  Can you stand it?  They are made from the most durable, safe materials available and they are GREEN, oh so GREEN.

Hart $69.00

Joy & Dixie introduce us to Hart.h_020804.jpg

Joy:  “I’ve had a hankerin’ for a wooden dildo for ages.  I’ve admired them online and even held a few in my hands at our local sex emporium.  But nothing compares to owing one and having it inside you.”
Dixie:  “That is so true. Hart is simply beautiful. It’s made of exotic Bocote wood, which gives it a very distinctive striped appearance.  And besides it’s beauty it is as functional as all get-out. It has a long, smooth shaft that allows you to enjoy deep penetration using either end.”
Joy:  “Yeah, and it’s a ‘double header’ too. There is a ball at one end that is ideal for G-spot (or P-spot) stimulation.  But it also has a more traditional head on the other end, which is followed by 4 ridges.  I love my dildos ridged!”
Dixie:  “I agree, I love the rippling sensation too.  And I like that it’s size is not overwhelming.  It’s 10.5” long, but it’s only 1.25” in diameter at its widest point.”
Joy:  “We spent a lot of time trying it every which way.  And it is safe to use with all kinds of lubes.  We are partial to silicone-based lubes and because Hart is so naturally smooth, a very little bit of lube goes a long way.”

Read more of this review here

Whimsy $69.00

Glenn & Hank introduce us to Whimsy.wh_020820_0.jpg

Hank:  “We have a more manly sized Jildo Dildo. Then do the girls.”
Glenn:  “I just love that name!  ‘Honey, can you please pass the Jildo Dildo?’”
Hank:  “I know, and we don’t even have to christen this one, because it comes with its own name — Whimsy.”
Glenn:  “It’s a nice 1.5” wide and a bit shorter, at 10”, than Joy & Dixie’s Hart.”
Hank:  “I don’s suppose we have to repeat all the stuff that the girls said about lube, care and cleaning, do we?  Good!”
Glenn:  “Yeah, but we should describe it better.”
Hank:  “Oh, ok!  It’s made of American Cherry wood.”
Glenn:  “Think of it as cherry pie on a stick.”
Hank:  “You are such a dork!”
Glenn:  “You love it!”
Hank:  “Our Whimsy is also a ‘double header’. One end is rounded.  Think prostate stimulation…or G-spot stimulation. The other end is bullet shaped.  There’s a combination of swirls and ridges, which deliver a variety of sensations with the old in and out.”
Glenn:  “Mmmm, in and out!”
Hank:  “Have you ever met a hornier bastard?”
Glenn:  “I’m an unapologetic power bottom; what can I say?  And when Hank works my ass with Whimsy, I’m in pig heaven.  And this thing warms to my body very fast.  It’s like totally awesome.”

Read more of this review here

Keeping with today’s GREEN theme we’ve got a couple of delicious products from a little company in Vancouver, BC called Hathor Aphrodisia.

Lubricant Pure 4 oz $18.00 CAD

I, Dr Dick, have the distinct pleasure of introducing you to Lubricant Pure. I am so fond of this mighty-mite of a company from right here in the beautiful Pacific Northwest.  What a joy it is to bring their products to your attention.

aphrodisia-group-shot-sm.jpg

Ya’ll know my passion for GREEN adult products, right? Hathor Aphrodisia is a boutique company that brings us only a few choice products, but each one is a work of love.

Lubricant Pure is an exceptionally fine personal lube.  It contains pure botanical emollients including Horny Goat Weed, Jujube Zizyphus and Siberian Ginseng, which are supposed to have aphrodisiacal properties.  Can’t honestly say I noticed any difference in my sexual response cycle.  But as my granny used to say, ‘It couldn’t hurt!’”

Read more of this review here

Lubricant Lickeurs — Coconut Orange        4 oz $22.00 CAD

Lubricant Lickeurs — Coconut Orange 4 oz $22.00 CAD

Gina & Kevin introduce us to Lubricant Lickeurs from Hathor Aphrodisia.

Gina: “I’ve never been one for flavored lubes. The whole concept seems silly to me. But I also don’t like the taste of regular lubes. They taste funny. Basically, I just avoid, as much as possible, coming in oral contact with any lube. So when we were asked to review Lubricant Lickeurs I said to myself, ‘Oh ick!”3-lubricant-lickeurs-sm.jpg
Kevin: “I was of the same mind as Gina. I mean, how juvenile? By the way, I love the natural taste of Gina’s pussy, like fresh out of her panties. I suppose it helps that she vegan. Her juices are naturally sweet and I can eat her all day long.”
Gina: “He sure is talented in the department, I must say. There was a time that I was uncomfortable with him doing oral on me, but now I love it. It helps that it isn’t a chore for him. It’s taken me probably as long to warm to the idea of giving oral to Kevin too. But now I’m such a bad girl that I don’t even give it a second thought.”
Kevin: “Actually, she’s a natural-born cocksucker. She just needed to liberate herself from all the Catholic school repression.”
Gina: “But enough about us; back to the Lubricant Lickeurs. Neither one of us wanted to disappoint the good Dr, so we agreed to try it.”
Kevin: “And damn if we both don’t absolutely love this stuff.”
Gina: “Yeah, so much for our natural prejudices, huh? But I must say, Lubricant Lickeurs is a grown-ups version of flavored lubes.”
Kevin: “It’s like Hathor Aphrodisia didn’t simply make a lube and then try to flavor it as an afterthought with some artificial flavoring.”

Read more of this review here

To continue this week’s GREEN, and I might add YUMMY, theme we veer toward the food end of the spectrum. Jack & Karen introduce us to the delicious, yet oh so helpful, teas from the good people at Intimate Teas.

My Maple Cookie 12 bags — $32.00

Karen: “This is so cool. I’m a big tea drinker. Never been one for coffee, but I do know my teas. And since I’m a naturally hyper kinda gal, I try to avoid caffeine as much as possible. These teas are delicious and they are herbal.”maple-cookie-full-product-page2.jpg
Jack: “I, on the other hand, am not a big tea drinker, but I agree; these teas are good. There’s an earthiness to them that I really liked.
Karen: “First up today is My Maple Cookie. I love it; what a name. This tea is a unique blend of premium herbs specially formulated to change the female genitalia and male semen to smell and taste like maple cookies. How fun is that?”
Jack: “Who would have guessed something like this was even possible. I have to admit, it’s the damnedest thing. Karen and I shared the tin of 12 tea bags over a 10 day period. We both noticed a difference in the way we smelled and tasted. Don’t get me wrong; I love the natural taste of she and me, but this is way fun.”

Read more of this review here

Jack: “Next up we have Screaming O tea. The Intimate Teas people get high marks for the clever names and the packaging.”
Karen: “They sure enough do! This tea is a premium blend of unique herbs made to increase sexual passion in both women and men. It is supposed to be an aphrodisiac, sexual stimulant and it’s supposed to intensify orgasms.”screaming-o-full-product-page3.jpg
Jack: “That’s what it says on the website. I was dubious…at first. I figured, I already have intense orgasms, do I really need to improve on that…even if it’s possible?”
Karen: “Things are much different for us gals, but I think you know that already. I felt like the tea really did stimulate me. And maybe it was only wishful thinking, but I felt my orgasms intensified too.”
Jack: “Again, I defer to my lovely wife. One thing for sure; this tea is a stimulant. The first time I had this tea was near bedtime. I thought, a nice cup of warm tea will make me sleep like a baby. NOT! I tossed and turned all night long. But I did have a raging boner in the morning. I don’t know if those two thing are connected, but they did follow one after the other.”

Read more of this review here

Who knew?

Name: Nola
Gender: female
Age: 42
Location:  Springfield
My husband and I only have masturbation sex because he say’s he can’t feel me anymore when we make love. He says he still loves me, but he says I’m very loose down there.  And I know why too.  We have three wonderful boys — 12, 9 and 6.  All were big babies and all three were vaginal births.  And I don’t think I ever rebounded afterwards and now that I’m older, well things are not like they used to be. Is this the end of sex for us?

A very common complaint, Nola; I write and talk about lax pelvic musculature a lot on this site and in my private practice.  Sure there is hope for regaining muscle tone, and it’s not particularly difficult to achieve.

Let’s start with a bit of an anatomy lesson.  You have several pelvis floor muscles the one we’re most concerned with is called the pubococcygeus, or the PC muscle.  It supports and holds in place the internal sex organs for both women and men.  —Pay attention men, the following exercises can whip your PC muscles in shape too.— It’s attached to the front of the pubic bone and goes all the way around to your butt hole. When one’s PC muscle is taut and toned, a contraction can be felt all over the pelvic area — cock, cunt, clit and ass hole.  So you see how important this muscle is to performance as well as pleasure for both women and men, right?

Still don’t know which muscle I’m talking about?  Ok, try this — while taking a pee, abruptly stop and start the flow of urine.  Can you do it?  Lots of women and some men can’t.  As you suggest, birthin’ babies is pretty traumatic to your pelvic musculature.  These muscles lose tone with each successive delivery (not to mention the impact the aging process has on our muscles). If you can’t abruptly stop the flow of pee, then you’re gonna have to find the PC muscle another way.  Try this, stick a couple fingers inside your pussy and squeeze.  You may have to insert more than two fingers to find what you are looking for. But when you feel pressure around your fingers, you’ve hit the mark.

Consider this, if you are using more than two fingers to find your PC muscle, you can understand why your hubby ain’t gettin the friction he needs to get off through fucking, right?

kegel-exercises.jpg

Ok, so let’s work on some exercises that will tighten things up down there.  These exercises are commonly called Kegel Exercises. You need to spend 30 minutes a day at this (twice a day would even be better).  And I want you to commit to this regiment for two weeks.  If you can’t commit this kind of time; then yes, you can say good by to fucking your husband ever again. If your sex life is important to you, you WILL find the time to do your kegels.

While lying on your back, or reclining propped up with some pillows, start by relaxing everything except your vaginal muscles. This will take some doing, so be patient.  Remember, you have 30 minutes to fill.  Insert your fingers in your pussy, and clench your PC muscle.  You’ll want to LIFT UP while you do this, not bear down. If you’re tightening your abs, squeezing your legs together, clenching your butt, or holding your breath then you’re not exercising the right muscle.

I want you to work on both muscle strength and tone.  With fingers inserted, start with five strong prolonged squeezes (5 seconds apiece).  Squeeze, hold — 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 — then relax.  Then do a series of 10 rapid contractions in a row. Doing three sets of these two types of Kegels during your 30 minutes a day is your goal.  If you’re tightening your abs to finger your pussy, consider inserting a dildo instead.

Let’s go over that one more time.  Start with five strong prolonged squeezes (5 seconds apiece). Squeeze, hold — 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 — then relax.  Then do a series of 10 rapid contractions in a row.

When you’ve accomplished this you’re ready to increase the set to eight or ten prolonged squeezes and 20 rapid contractions in a set.  The advanced Kegeler is able to vary the type and duration of her PC squeezing; slow prolonged clenches to quick flutters. And, darling, this doesn’t have to be drudgery.  Add some up-tempo dance music and tighten and release your PC muscle to the rhythm.  You will naturally vary the exercises and have way more fun too.

Hey, want to kick things up a notch?  Combine you PC Exercises with jilling off! energie.jpgThat’s right, darlin, throw yourself a screamin meme of an orgasm as you’re exercising.  This is where a nice vibrating dildo will come in handy.  You may find that you’re more likely to attend to your exercise regime if there’s pleasure involved.

Throw in some patterned breathing and pelvic rocking with your exercises. Rock your pelvis up, exhale and squeeze the PC tight. Squeeze, hold — 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 — then inhale, drop your hips back down and relax the muscle. Once you get the hang of this, reverse the exercise. Inhale while rocking forward and exhale while dropping back.

One final suggestion, check out the Natural Contours Energie Kegel Exerciser.  You can read all about this marvelous doohickey by going to the Product Review Page and look for Review #16

If you follow my instructions for this two-week exercise course, you will notice a marked improvement to your pelvic muscle tone.  Won’t the hubby be surprised when you invite him for a fuck and he finds the taut and toned pussy of a woman half your age.

Name: Leo
Gender: male
Age: 25
Location: Miami
I am a 29yr old light skinned latin male, very healthy. Being latin, my skin has…well…you know…that tan color. Over the past 2-3 years I have been seeing these lighter color, almost white spots evolving on my penis and butt and thighs and elbows.  It began with just one small spot on my penis, and over the years I got a more spots around the rest of the area. It’s to the point that I’m too embarrassed to have sex. It looks like the whole area down there is transforming into big ugly blotches. It definitely does not look healthy.  Do you know what this is?  Do I have some kind of sexually transmitted disease?

You appear to be describing vitiligo, a dermatological condition where the skin, vitiligo55jpg.jpgoften in the genital area, loses its pigment.  This is not a disease, let alone a sexually transmitted infection.  It’s a condition and it’s not all that uncommon. When you lose pigment, it leaves islands of white skin surrounded by your natural skin color, tan in your case.  It’s kinda like a Palamino horse.

Medicine doesn’t know a lot about vitiligo.  What is known for certain is that it is not contagious. It appears to be an acquired condition and may appear at any age, but mostly before 40. Genetics may play a part, as there is an increased incidence of vitiligo in some families. Vitiligo is more noticeable in darker skinned people because of the contrast with the white patches against dark skin. It seems to occur more often among people with an autoimmune problem. The depigmentation can be progressive for some people, although not everyone.

In terms of treatment, there aren’t any to speak of.  Some claim modest success with a repigmenting agents or immunosuppressant medications.  Some people, like Michael Jackson, go to great lengths and extremes to compensate for this condition.  Obviously, this is not advisable.  I mean, just look at him.  I just can’t see how his untreated vitiligo would have been any less scary than what he’s transformed himself into?  But that’s just me.

For most folks with vitiligo, myself included, our best bet is to make peace with our uniqueness, leave it alone and move on.  I’ll admit it takes some getting use to, since the appearance of our skin is so tied with our self-esteem.  But, those of you in my audience who regularly read my column, or listen to my podcasts, know that shit happens to our bodies.  Birth defects, aging, disease processes, amputations, vitiligo7.jpgscaring, disabling accidents and disfiguring surgeries are all part and parcel of being a human.  Those who successfully move through their problems and find their self-worth in a more holistic appreciation of themselves enjoy a fuller, richer life, which includes a full and rich sex life.  If you need help pulling this together for yourself, Leo, support is available online.  Just search for vitiligo support.

As for your sexual partners and the questions they might have; why not just be upfront about what’s goin on?  Simply say you have vitiligo.  It’s about pigment, not performance.  And then show ‘em what ya got, baby!

Name: Peaches & Herb
Gender: couple
Age:  30-something
Location:  Washington DC
We’re a hip, 30-something couple and we’re looking for a little adventure.  We want to throw a sex party.  We know several couples who we think would be interested in joining us.  But we’re not sure how or where to start.  What do you suggest?
PS: Peaches & Herb are not our real names.

You don’t say!  I would have never guessed! Peaches & Herb, indeed.

Actually, P&H, I hesitate to offer any suggestions, because it sounds to me like you guys are complete amateurs when it comes to swinging, if you are swingers at all.  Throwing a sex party for a bunch of straight folks is not like hosting Sunday orgy7.jpegbrunch, where all that could go wrong is serving an unsuitable wine with the quiche. A poorly planned sex party can be a catastrophe and destroy friendships and make instant enemies.  If I were you, I’d start planning my own party only after I attended several other parties hosted by folks who know what the fuck they’re doing.

But to give you the benefit of the doubt I’ll offer a the these suggestion.  First, I’d begin by asking myself what kind of party do me and the little woman want to host?

A sexy party — attendees dress in provocative outfits — lingerie and the like, get all liquored up, play naughty games, like “Truth or Dare” which evolve into group make-out session — where few risks are taken and nobody gets hurt if things go badly.

A sex party — attended by out and proud swingers.  Here the agenda is obviously sex, but there are a shit-load of very important things to consider before the invitations go out.  More about this in a minute.

An orgy — a no holds bared, check your cloths at the door, full-on sex extravaganza.  This is kind of gathering is not for the novice.  In fact, it’s more a gay sex party option than a straight sex party option.  The reasons I believe this are coming up.

Whatever kind of party you choose, you’ll want to carefully consider the people you invite.  It’s a good idea to always have some instigators on your list.  You know, the folks who will be the first to make out, dance and shed their cloths.  Established swingers are always a good choice for this.  They’ll be less inhibited than the newbies.

Do you desire an equal male/female ratio? Couples only? Singles only? Straights only? No single men? Will you allow for bisexual expression, specifically the male-on-male type?  Will you allow kink?  Or will this be a vanilla party?

If you’re thinking of inviting relative strangers, you might want to consider screening them in advance. You’ll want to make sure the prospective guest will fit in with the others on your list.

Where’s the shindig gonna be held?  Your home, a rented space, a hotel suite?  If all goes well, the party will probably be loud and nude, so consider your neighbors and neighborhood carefully.  Wherever you host, designate some areas as sex areas and some areas as rest/neutral/no-sex areas.

Will you serve adult beverages?  If you do, how much is too much?  Will there be food?  Probably if there’s booze, there ought to be at least some food, right? Even if it’s simply powerbars and gaterade,

Music is very important to setting the mood.  The wrong music — there goes the party.  Your play space must be clean and warm with plenty of places to freshen up in.  That will necessitate soap and water and lots of fresh towels.  Muted lighting is essential, at least in some of the areas. Throw pillows are good.  Vinyl sheets are practical.  Or have your guests donate a set of clean sheets to the festivities. You need to realize that it will be a mess everywhere your guests fuck, what with all the lube and bodily fluids and the like.  And there’s always gonna be accidents like orgy08.jpgspills, smells and skid marks, if you catch my drift.

Speaking of which, have lube, condoms, and latex gloves, baby wipes and what have you in every room you designate as a play space.  Nothing sets the mood like some classy pornography playing in the background. Have your guests turn off their cell phones.  And I’d also consider having a definite arrive time.  No one admitted after a certain hour.  New arrivals can ruin a mood, unless you’re sure they will blend in and get down to business immediately.

Sex party etiquette is essential.  A lot of this will depend on the kind of party you’re hosting and the type of people you invite.  But you should insist that your guests behave themselves…in a smutty sort of way…of course.  Guests should be polite.  No means NO!  I would discourage guests who might just want to attend for the show.  There are no bigger turn-offs than a lecherous gawker or an uncomfortable wallflower.  Permission to join a grouping is mandatory.  And a sense of humor is always appreciated, just so long as it doesn’t bust the mood.  And finally, safe sex ought to be a must!

Good luck ya’ll

Take A Deep Breath

Name: Jake
Gender:
Age: 18
Location: London
I have never had sex mostly because I have never managed to approach the person. I am bisexual and am desperate to have sex with a guy or girl. What are the best ways to approach someone for sex?

Can’t manage to approach a person for sex?  Are you just really shy, or are you a total geek?  Either way, my friend, you gotta get over yourself if you ever hope to get laid.  And here’s a tip:  perspective partners can smell desperation, like the kind you speak of, a mile away.  And they will avoid you like the plague.

Ok, so you’re just 18 without a lot of experience in the ways of the world.  teen_sexuality.jpgHere’s what I tell everyone who asks me this question, regardless of age, gender or sexual orientation.  When it comes to asking for sex; the direct approach works best.  Just so long as you’re not a dick about it.  If you haven’t already discovered this, baggin a bird will probably take a bit more finesse than pokin’ on a bloke.  And coming on to a mate demands a different approach than hittin’ up a stranger for a shag.

If there’s a bit of charm about you, your task will be considerably easier than if you are a crude Neanderthal who just wants to notch his belt.  If you’re not sure what your selling points are, ask a friend for his or her feedback.  If he or she tells you nice things bout yourself, you might be in luck.  If he or she tells you that you’re a charmless creep, you’ll have your work cut out for you.

Regardless what group you fall into — the “maybe fuckable”, or the “not fucking ever”, you can always improve your image and hone your unique style.  Look to how you present yourself; make sure you are groomed, clean and odor-free.  Dress to impress.  Stay clear of fancy or fussy, but do make it look like you gave your cloths a thought before you dressed yourself.  Make yourself interesting; have a point of view, but share it sparingly.  Develop a sense of humor about yourself.  If you can’t be clever or witty, then keep your mouth shut for the most part.

boys_kissing05.jpgThe internet is a great place to test the waters.  Dating and hook-up sites abound.  Put up a profile…with a photo or two.  Here’s a tip, save the dick pics for the queer sites.  Women don’t want to see your pathetic willie, at least not right away.  And like I said above, there’s nothing more unattractive to most women, or men, than a desperate fuck.  Asking for what you want is good, pleading to be taken out of pity is not!

Few women are as casual about sex as are most men.  So if a woman tells you no, she just may be shy, or not ready, or not sure.  If a guy tell you no, it’s not the end of the world.  He’s probably not into your type.  Since there are so many fish in the sea, if you’re not immediately successful, move on.  Sometimes getting laid is a situational thing.  Being in the right place at the right time is helpful.

Chicks are gonna be concerned about the whole pregnancy thing. This is much more serious concern for a woman then for a dude. If you’re not well versed on all methods of contraception and willing to practice at least one, you’re not ready to have sex. Sexually transmitted infections ought to be a concern for you both.  Don’t be a fuck-up; always use a condom regardless of your partner’s gender.

condoms001.jpg

If you’re dick is hard, it’s not the right time to talk about sex with a woman, but it might be the best time to hit up a dude.  Women don’t necessarily like the lean and hungry look.  Men tend to groove on it.

There are lots of different ways to have sex, so what might be appealing to one person may not be to another.  Hand jobs and/or blow jobs are often more easy to cum by than full-on fucking with both birds and blokes.

In the end, there no standard way to ask for sex, but if you treat a prospective partner, regardless of gender, with respect, honesty, and patience, you can be sure whatever words you use will be more effective than if you’re an uncouth lout.

Name: Nita
Gender: female
Age: 40
Location: South Africa
I recently had abdominal surgery to remove a cancer.  I’m recovering pretty well, and the prognosis for my future is also pretty good.  But I am noticing two problems. The surgery left a really big scar.  It’s still not fully healed yet, but I can tell it’s always going to be ugly.  And my belly is really misshapen now. I felt pretty okay about my body before hand, but this scar really makes me look really unattractive.  Also, my sex drive has completely gone away. I used to be a pretty sexual person, but now nothing excites me. Would you say this is normal?

How long ago was your surgery, I wonder?  It’s got to be pretty recent, if you say the incision is still healing.

Darlin’, may I suggest that you’ve been through quite a trauma — a cancer diagnosis, recent surgery and all.  This would throw anyone for a loop.  I’d be willing to guess you’ve not had the proper time to process all of this.  It comes as no surprise to me that your libido has gone south.  I wouldn’t expect otherwise.

If you’re still healing on the outside, you know for sure your insides have a much longer way to go.  You’re probably still feeling some discomfort, right?  That’s enough to put the kibosh on sexual interest right there.  You’re body is consumed with the job of healing itself.  It probably hasn’t any energy to spare for sex.  And why have a libido if ya can’t be sexual, right?   So you see, your body is actually protecting itself and concentrating on the task at hand.sensual_massage110.JPG

Maybe at this point in your recovery a little pampering would be better for you than a pursuit of sexual pleasure.  Long luxurious baths will help soothe the tension, as well as giving your easy access to your fine pussy.  Even folks with no discernable libido find touching themselves enjoyable. And just to keep your head in the game, even though you’re sitting on the sidelines, you could read some erotica or watch some sexy smut.

Some modest exercise like walking or swimming can perk up the libido too.  Treat yourself to an erotic massage.  Let a pro get his or her hands on you and make you glow.  This may also help bring back some of the sensitivity to areas effected by the surgery.  One things for sure, doing something is better than doing nothing but sitting there wondering what’s up.

An invasive and disfiguring surgery will always have a profound effect on one’s body image, which goes without saying.  Feeling unattractive because of a scar? No doubt about it, it’s a bummer.  But here you are writing to me about it, instead of napping six-feet under.  So I guess the scar is not the worst thing that could have happened, right?  As you probably know, I’m hearing from a number of my country’s war vets returning home with shattered bodies and lives.  My advice to them is what I offer you now.  Move through the scar’s impact…with a therapist if need be.  And find within yourself the other things that make you beautiful, attractive, alluring and desirable. Who knows, you might luck out and find a scar fetishist out there who will worship you for what you find loathsome.

mastectomy_scars.jpgEmbracing and then moving past your scaring will open you to find the myriad pleasures your body can still provide you and others.  So while your body works on healing itself, your mind can do likewise.  No need to have two scars, on one your belly and another one on your psyche.  In the end you may find that flaunting your scar, like some women do with their mastectomy scars, will liberate you from feeling unattractive.  After all, that scare and misshapen abdomen are your red badges of courage, honey.  Not only do they make you distinct, but also they testify to you being a survivor.

Name: David
Gender: Male
Age: 27
Location: New York, NY
This is a rather disgusting question. I am a gay male who prefers to be the bottom. The trouble is that even if I perform an enema right before sex, I still seem to get some excrement onto my partner’s penis during sex. It just seems that the feeling of the motion back and forth inside of me causes a sensation that makes something come out. The odor is, at times, unpleasant and I, of course, am mortified. I wonder if this is a common problem and if there is anything else I can do to PREVENT this from happening?? Could it perhaps be my diet? Do I need to drink more water?

YIKES!  You sound like a real attractive guy, David.  Just kidding!

If you are douching properly before the butt fucking there shouldn’t be much seepage if any.  Maybe you’re not taking care of business correctly.  Or maybe you need to douche twice.  Or maybe you’re being fucked too hard.  I know that a vigorous fucking will introduce more air into the bottom’s rectum expanding it and making for that “OMG, I gotta take a dump” feeling.butt_fuck5.jpg

I understand you being mortified; a smelly dirty fuck is no fun for anyone.  That being said, you have to realize your bowels are working properly, so it’s not their fault.  Just remember, there will inevitably be some unpleasant side effects when rootin’ around in someone’s hole, regardless how fastidious the bottom is about his hygiene.

I’m not sure I see the connection between diet and hydration and messy fucking, but hell, I’d try just about anything to keep from embarrassing myself when my toes are pointed to jesus!

Name: Ken
Gender:
Age: 42
Location: Seattle
I recently went to get a massage with a “happy ending” As soon as the girl started to fondle me I came and I did not even have an erection yet.  I never have this problem with my wife or past girlfriends. Why did this happen? It sure cost a lot of money for about five minutes with this “lady”. Thanks

Well, let’s see…either this “masseuse” (and I use that term very loosely) was amazingly talented, or you were just real nervous about doing this naughty thing with someone other than your wife.

Hmmm, I bet it was the later.

Here’s a tip, always get the massage first…before the happy ending.  If the first thing that happens is the happy ending, then you got gypped, darlin’!

Name: Marion
Gender: female
Age: 32
Location: NYC
I’m 34 and single.  After 15 years of unsuccessful dating, searching for the right guy to marry and raise a family with, I decided to go it alone.  I’m 2 months pregnant through artificial insemination.  You’ll love this; the donor is my best gay pal.  I am absolutely delighted and cherish the thought of finally being a mother.  While a lot of the guys I’ve been dating aren’t father material, they are great sex and I don’t want to continue to enjoy their company.  I gather that it’s safe to have sex during pregnancy.  But is there anything I should avoid?  Are there specific sexual positions that better suit a mommy-to-be like me?

Hey, congratulations on the bun in the oven, darlin’.  And how true about some men being great in the sack, but not desirable husband and/or father material.  I know several gay men who have helped out a long-suffering straight and lesbian friends with the whole breeding thing.  Us “mos” are so selfless in that regard.  ;-)

It’s difficult to find accurate and unambiguous information about sex preg_sex01jpg.jpgduring pregnancy that doesn’t have a decidedly sex-negative bias to it.  For the most part, our culture promotes the message that sex is primarily for procreation.  Why then would any responsible mother to be continue to have sex if she’s already knocked up?  You can see where a lot of the misconceptions, misinformation and scare tactics come from, huh?

So let’s see if we can shed some light on this for ya.  As a pregnancy advances, the fertilized egg grows into an embryo and then into a fetus. The fetus is encased in and protected by the amniotic cavity.  This provides the fetus nourishment and protects it from infections.  A thick layer of mucus seals the cervix further isolating the fetus in the mother’s uterus.

If you’re having a normal pregnancy, as do most women, then there is no reason to alter your sex life during your pregnancy.  Since this is your first, you’ll not know this, but a woman who has a history of premature birth may be advised by her physician to abstain from partnered sex during the last three months of pregnancy.  In the same way, a woman with a history of miscarriage will probably be advised to avoid partnered sex in the first trimester.  Only women with high-risk pregnancies might be advised to avoid sex for the full term of the pregnancy.

Nature provides all protection the fetus needs in its mother’s uterus. So you don’t need to worry about semen or vaginal fluids coming into contact with the baby.  And the mucus seal on your cervix does not allow a penis to come in direct contact with the fetus either.  Which dispels several misconceptions right there, don’t cha know.

In terms of pregnancy related sex, I suspect that your libido will probably play a more determining role in your availability for sex than you capacity to have sex.  Your libido will no doubt fluctuate during your pregnancy, which may have a lot to do with hormonal fluctuations.  Increased blood circulation in your pelvic region will heighten sensations, but you may find your body feels too heavy to fully enjoy sex.

Most men will love your bigger tits and fuller hips, but sometimes an overriding concern to avoid any exertion on the uterus or in the vagina makes partnered sex too cumbersome.

Sex during pregnancy, like sex after menopause, is free of worry about contraception, which makes sex more enjoyable for some.  While others are too busy anticipating the new addition to be much interested in sex at all.

In terms of sexual positions, you’re gonna be the best judge of that.  No preg_sex08.jpgposition is automatically ruled out, but as your pregnancy progresses you’ll find some positions, like the missionary position, will be uncomfortable. One of the best positions might be the woman on top position. Sometimes known as the Cowgirl position.  This position takes all of the pressure off of the woman’s abdomen, and also allows her to control the speed and the depth of thrusting.

And if you are a fan of anal sex; that will continue to be a terrific option throughout your pregnancy, particularly doggie style.  Some pregnant women claim that butt fucking actually helps soothe their pregnancy induced hemorrhoids.  In your final weeks mutual masturbation may be the easiest option as well as the most satisfying sexual outlet.

Good Luck ya’ll

Running on Empty

I know things are a bit mixed up this week.  Frequent visitors to Dr Dick’s Sex Advice will know that Wednesdays are traditionally Video Days on the site. But I have to veer off course this week.  I have some questions to respond to and I can’t do my Q&A on Friday this week, as I usually do, because I have a swell Product Review scheduled for Friday.

Do you see how nutty things can get when you have more things to do than days to do them on?  Anyhow, breaking with tradition every now and again is a good thing.

Name: lost angel
Gender: Male
Age: 21
Location: cali
Is the base of the penis behind the balls??? When I get hard my cock points kinda upward is this ok????

The base of your cock is not behind your balls.  That’s what’s called your dick root.  The base of your cock is where your cock meets your pubic bone on the dorsal (top) side of your johnson.

Having your boner point upward is as good as a place for it to point as any; and maybe better than some.

Name: Stephen
Gender: Male
Age: 41
Location: Va
As I have gotten older my sex drive has decreased tremendously. What can I do to turn it around?

Everyone’s libido decreases as he/she ages.  There’s no gettin around that.  However, a healthy lifestyle — good nutrition, maintaining your proper weight, getting an adequate amount of sleep, eliminating stress, modest alcohol and caffeine consumption and regular exercise will keep your sexual response cycle at its peek throughout your life.  Simply put, the healthier you are; the more libido you will enjoy.

That being said, I am increasingly more optimistic about the use of herbal supplements to help us gh.jpgropex.jpgolder folk stay in tip-top sexual condition.  To that end, I’d like to turn you on to three products I am currently testing on myself — Ropex, GH and Onkor Energy.   A full product review of Ropex and GH will appear on this site in time.  But the Onkor Energy review is already available on the Product Reviews page. Look for REVIEW #14.

What I’ve discovered through my product testing and review is that not all herbal supplements are created equal.  But you’ve probably figured this out on your own, huh?  I’ve tried several similar products that were completely ineffectual.  Others had unpleasant side effects.onkormen.jpg

Here’s something everyone should know.  A lot of these “Male Enhancement” and herbal products are produced in China under dubious conditions.  And everyone in the supplement industry will tell you, confidentially of course, that most of these products are adulterated with knock-off pharmaceuticals.  And that’s down right dangerous for us all.

I confidently offer these three products to you, because they work for me.  Just be assured that neither one of these products will not override a pathologically unhealthy lifestyle.  Look to your personal health and wellbeing first.  Supplement that if you must.

Hej from Sweden,
I am Mark and wanting advice regarding douching correctly.  I am 100% bottom but for personal reasons I decided to give up sex for at least 1 year.  NOW I have the horn again and I’m definitely in the mood!  I am wanting to be sure that all is ‘clean’ down there before having my ass played with  …..any advice on proper cleaning.
Great website BTW!
Hugs and blowjobs….
Mark x

Warm water is all you need.  Never use soap.b712.jpg

Some men add lemon juice or vinegar (1-2 Tbs. per quart) of the warm water.  Others dissolve (2 Tbs.) of baking soda in a quart of warm water.

Stay away from commercially produced douches; most contain harmful and irritating chemicals.  And trust me, you don’t want that.  Besides, all those over the counter douches are expensive.  And all that packaging is definitely not eco-friendly.  And we all want to be green perverts, don’t we?

Finally there is always the ever-versatile shower or bath bidet option. You can find one model, the Travel Shur Shot, in My Stockroom.

There are also stainless steel options that hook up to your shower head.

Name: Tommy
Gender: Male
Age: 36
Location: Ontario,CA
HI Dick : I had a problem keeping an erection when under the influence of crystal meth. It’s not that i wasn’t aroused. Is this common when taking speed?

Ahhh HELLO!  Are you so new to the Tina scene that you’ve never heard the term — “Crystal Dick”?   Holy cow!  Time to wake up and smell the coffee, honey.

 

meth_kills9.jpg

All tweakers will inevitably experience erection problems; some will be so serious that the guy will never recover.  Tweakers will often try to compensate for this lack of wood by taking Viagra, or another erection enhancing drug.  This is extremely dangerous because this combination will raise one’s blood pressure to dangerously high levels.  Or one could experience a really long lasting hardon, that could actually permanently damage your rod.

You’ve probably heard the old adage:  Meth Kills, right?  Well, it true.  While it may not be the death of you, per se.  You can be assured that it will kill your sexual response cycle.

Name: jack
Gender: Male
Age: 26
Location: denmark
hey I’m a 26 year old male who has struggled with alcohol abuse for many years as a result my balls have shrunk I don’t know what to do but I’m nervous about having sex and have even thought of taking my life.  I feel humiliated.  Is there something I can do or can I learn to live with this?  Will guys mind?

First off, congratulations on kickin’ the booze habit.  My hat is off to you!  If you can conquer balls6.jpgalcoholism, you’re pretty much set up to handle anything life sends your way; including a case of shrunken nuts.

Don’t despair, my friend, no one’s gonna kick you out of the sack for havin’ marbles in the sack instead of eggs.  Lots of men have smaller than usual testicles and it has nothing to do with alcohol consumption.  It’s just a natural variation on size and shape.

No need to be self-conscious about something as trivial as ball size and lose sight of the fact that you’ve overcome one of the worst scourges known to human kind.  You are a hero!  Never forget that.  And if the only scars you have to show for your valiant battle against demon alcohol is smaller cajones, then you’re luckier than most.

Get out there and learn to enjoy yourself again.  You will soon find that most men will be attracted to you for your personal courage and tenacity.  They won’t give a damn about the size of your balls.

Name: sami
Gender: Male
Age: 25
Location: Pakistan
I have visit many website and read about the erectile dysfunction problems but I want to know some thing about my problem which I have with my penis and I have used too much medicine for this and this problem is with me more than 6 years. I m from Pakistan and here doctors not treat me well or they are not expert in erectile dysfunction.
I’m 25 year old now and single.  The problem is that when ever I think about the sex or see any porn movie or chat with girl on sex topic then the drops like water come outside but its not like water its some juicy type and after this no erection come in my penis. And it cum soon without erection. I have used many medicines but to no avail.  Please tell me about my disease what is this?
And when ever I try to do sex with girl then again this drops come very fast in early and after that no erection and I can cum after one minute using my hands. I have also problem of early ejaculation too. While when i sleep and get up in morning some time my penis is in full erection and full motion but whenever I think about sex these drops come and the erection finish of my penis. So please tell me in details about this disease. Diagnose it and tell me the medicine for this because I want treatment from online doctor not from the Pakistani doctors and also want to take medicine online imported one because in Pakistan also not available good quality and variety medicine. Thanks

Things sound like they are in a pretty sorry state there in Pakistan.  That’s regrettable.

First up, if I understand you correctly, and that is a big “IF”; I’m gonna guess that you don’t need a doctor or medication.  It appears to me that you are dealing with two distinct issues:  1) excessive precum and 2) premature ejaculation.  Ok, let’s handle each one of these in turn.

You’ll find all the postings and podcasts I’ve done on the topic of pre-ejaculate by going to the precum03.jpegCATEGORIES section in the sidebar and searching for the word “precum”. Basically, excessive precum is nothing more than a bothersome issue for most men who experience it.  But it’s not a medical condition.  And there aren’t any medications you can take to relieve the problem.  Think of it as the equivalent of excessive sweating. There’s not a whole lot you can do about that either.  Issues like these tend to clear up on their own as we age.

You’ll find all the postings and podcasts I’ve done on the topic of premature ejaculation by going to the CATEGORIES section in the sidebar and searching for the words “lasting longer”.  Basically, a guy can easily learn to control his ejaculation response with a little effort on his part.  These postings and podcasts contain detailed “how to” instructions on how to achieve this control.  Again, this is not a medical condition.  And there aren’t any medications you can take to relieve the problem.

Name: liza
Gender: Female
Age: 30
Location: tyne and wear
My boyfriend is a transvestite and just recently he has started taking fenugreek seed tablets and red clover blossom tablets do you have any ideas why? I am concerned that michael5.jpgmaybe he is wanting to become a woman full time could this be a possibility? Please help???

I think I’m a pretty wise and insightful guy, but I would never hazard a guess as to what might be going on in the mind of a drag queen…ever!  ;-)

I suppose the only way you will know for sure what he’s up to is to ask.

What I can say with some certainty is that most TV’s (transvestites) are not TS’s (transexuals), nor are they gender dysphoric.  They just like frilly knickers!

I looked up the herbal supplements you mentioned and I didn’t find anything that would suggest a sex change in the offing.  It’s more likely a case of dyspepsia.

Dear Dr. Dick,
I asked this question on the anonymous form but would prefer and
answer in my email.
I am concerned about my ED that I seem to have developed over the last
year or so. It could be the anti-depressants I am on but I have a
feeling it is Viagra. I have used Viagra for many years even when I
didn’t need it. It was just a guarantee that I could go all night. My
concern is that I have become dependent on it. When I don’t use it I
can get hard but it never last which is frustrating when with a very
hot bttm guy.
Hope to hear from you soon.

Yes, the use of antidepressants will surely impact, in a negative sort of way, one’s (both women and men) sexual response cycle, particularly the arousal stage.  In your case, your ability to get and/or cockbeans.jpgmaintain an boner.

I’ve written and spoken a lot about the use of Viagra and its fellow drugs.  You can find the postings and podcasts by going to the CATEGORY section in the sidebar of my site and search for Erection Enhancing Drugs.

Many men are becoming “hooked” on these drugs.  I would seriously recommend that you not use these meds recreationally.  I, for example, tend to rely on a cockring as opposed to a pharmaceutical.

You might also consider a high quality herbal supplement, like the ones I recommended to Steven up above.

Good luck ya’ll

U. B. Goode

As long as habit and routine dictate the pattern of living, new dimensions of the soul will not emerge. — Henry van Dyke

Name: Victoria
Gender:
Age: 22
Location: San Diego
I love sex with my boyfriend. It is great but sometimes it can be a real pain. I can’t seam to stay wet for to long even if it feels really good I still tend to dry up. I have tryed lubrication even lotion and it still only helps for a few mins then I dry up again. I can cum but even then after a few I get dry again. It makes it so hard cause my boyfriend tends to think I’m not wet cause he dosen’t please me. When it is not true. He is in fact the best lover I have ever had. Please is there anything I can do to help so I don’t dry up so fast?

Bummer, Victoria, a chronically dry pussy is no fun. First, lets put your boyfriend’s mind to rest.wet_pussy.JPG

Hey Bub, it ain’t you, darlin’. Listen to your woman. You’re pleasing her just fine. The problem resides in her inability to produce sufficient lubrication to make fucking fun and effortless. But lets see if we can get to the bottom of this AACS — Acute Arid Cunt Syndrome — and maybe we’ll find a solution along the way.

Ya know, Victoria, if you’re using the wrong kind of lube for the job it’s gonna dry out, sure as shootin’. And since I don’t know what you are using, I’m gonna employ the scattergun approach. There are several different types of vaginal lubricants available over-the-counter, as well as estrogen-based creams available by prescription. Vaginal lubricants come in tubes, plastic squeezie bottles, and some women swear by the vitamin E vaginal suppositories.

If I had to guess, I’d say you were trying to get the job done by using a water-based lube, right? If that’s the case, I suggest you switch to a Silicon-based lubricant. They don’t dry out as quickly as water-based lubes. They tend to be a bit more expensive. They’re not water-soluble, so clean up can be a bit of a chore. Here’s a tip: you’ll want to avoid using a Silicon-based lube while fucking on the brand new Laura Ashley’s, don’t ‘cha know. But all these minor drawbacks pale in comparison to some mighty fine slippery fucking. Look for Pjur Woman Bodyglide, 100 ml (B305), in Dr Dick Stockroom. Mind as well plug one of my favorite sponsors, right? If that doesn’t work, I’d ask a doctor about an estrogen-based cream.

dry_pussy.jpgBut before we go there, maybe you should be asking yourself what gives with your Acute Arid Cunt Syndrome anyway. Is anything about your lifestyle that contributes to the problem? You know lot of very popular meds interfere with natural vaginal lubrication including:

• Halcion
• Xanax
• Ativan
• Calcium channel blockers
• Beta-blockers
• and especially prescribed and over-the-counter cold and allergy medications.

High levels of stress and depression, as well as a hormone imbalance, can cause vaginal dryness too. If this sounds like you, you can combat some of this by boosting your water intake. If you’re not adequately hydrated — at least ten 8-oz glasses of water a day — kinda hydration, you know you’re gonna have a problem.

Also, many hand and body soaps and a lotta laundry products contain scents and other chemicals that will irritate the delicate mucosal tissues that line your pussy.

A healthy diet and proper exercise is also important to maintaining a healthy level of natural lubrication. Ya know those low-fat, high-carb diets many women are on these days? Well, they literally starve your body of the nutrients it needs to make sex hormones. For example, the estrogen needed for vaginal lubrication is made from cholesterol, something women on low-fat diets are woefully lacking.

Name: LARRY
Gender:
Age: 23
Location: MYRTLE BEACH SC
WHERE DOES SEMEN COME FROM? THAT IS TO SAY WHAT ORGAN (ORGANS) MAKE IT AND WHERE IS IT STORED. WHAT EXACTLY HAPPENS AT CLIMAX? IF YOU CLIMAX WITHOUT CUMING IS THAT SOMETHING THAT SHOULD CONCERN ME

Semen is the technical name for male ejaculate. However, we here at Dr Dick’s Sex Advice like to refer to this man juice as spooge, spunk, jizz or cum. Semen contains sperm, of course, which is produced in your testicles. It also contains a complex “soup” called seminal fluid, which is produced by various sex glands in your body. But, despite its complexity, baby batter is 90% water.

Your most important sex glands, the seminal vesicles, produce 70% of your joy juice. This seminal fluid iscum_shot99.JPG viscous and alkaline. The alkaline quality is very important because it neutralizes the acidic environment of your urethra and a woman’s vagina, which would otherwise kill all your little sperm-letts or at least make them inactive. And what good is inactive sperm?

Seminal fluid also contains a simple sugar, which provides the energy your seed needs to survive and wriggle about like crazy. Oh and precum. the stuff that often drizzles from your man meat while you’re being aroused, comes from the Cowper’s gland, and it too paves the way for a healthy ride for your delicate spermatozoa.

About 25% of the volume of your spooge comes from your prostate gland. This gives your spunk its milky appearance. Your prostate also adds substances, which increase the survival rate of your baby seeds.

On average, a man ejaculates between 2.5 and 5 ml of jizz per wad, which contains about 50 – 150 million sperm per milliliter. Just think of that next time you shoot your business into that dirty sock at the side of your bed. And here’s another thing, if a dude’s sperm count falls below 20 million per milliliter, he’s likely to be infertile, or as we like to call it — shootin’ blanks.

The amount of goop a guy gushes varies greatly, and has lots to do with how long his arousal period lasts before he shoots. Ya see, the longer the arousal period the more time there is for your fluids to build up. That’s why Dr Dick always suggests a nice long foreplay session. The greater the build up of spooge, the more powerful your ejaculatory contractions will be. Which, in turn, makes for a more intense orgasm.

You will notice that I am going out of my way to separate the two events — ejaculation and orgasm. For a most guys they happen simultaneously. But for the lucky few, and those who practice the art of tantra, multiple orgasms are possible before the ejaculation.

crreampie1.jpgYou’ll notice your spunk tends to be sticky and thick right after you blow your load. But soon there after it begins to separate and become more runny. This is pretty normal. It is also normal for the color and texture of your jizz to vary from time to time. Sometimes it can be real milky, sometime it’s clearer with only streaks of milkiness in it. It can also contain gelatinous globules from time to time. A lot of this has to do with how hydrated you are, how many times you’ve cum recently and of course your age. Spooge production diminishes as we age.

Each ejaculation is actually a collection of spurts that send waves of pleasure throughout your body, but especially in your cock and groin area. The first and second convulsions are usually the most intense, and propel the greatest quantity of jizz. Each following muscle contraction is associated with a diminishing volume of cum and a milder wave of pleasure.

Most of us men folk can’t resist increasing manual or thrusting stimulation when we get to the point of ejaculatory inevitably. Which is too bad, because if we practiced some simple edging techniques — that is coming right up to the point of shooting, but then halting direct cock stimulation till the urge to pop subsides — our pleasure would increase. We’d last longer and our expected orgasm would be more powerful.

The typical male orgasm lasts about 17 seconds but can vary from a few seconds up to about a full minute. A typical ejaculation consists of 10 to 15 contractions.cum_drip.jpg

I know that I mentioned this before, but it bears repeating here. A recent Australian study has suggests that frequent masturbation, particularly as a young man, appears to reduce the risk of prostate cancer later in life.

If you’re chokin’ the chicken a lot your sperm count will be low and the amount of jizz you produce will be less. But also age, testosterone level, nutrition and especially hydration play a big part in that too. Just remember, a low sperm count, is not the same thing as a diminished volume of cum.

When a guy blows his wad before he wants to, it’s called premature ejaculation. If a man is unable to ejaculate when he want to, even after prolonged stimulation, it is called delayed ejaculation, retarded ejaculation or anorgasmia.

An orgasm that is not accompanied by ejaculation is known as a dry orgasm. And that may or may not have anything to do with semen production, because some men ejaculate into their bladder, and that, my friend, is called a retrograde ejaculation.

Name: Ernie
Gender:
Age: 50
Location: Atlanta
I love to taste cum. However sometimes it is quite bitter. I’ve worried that it’s because someone is taking medicine that comes through in the semen. Am I at risk swallowing some cum if the guy is on heart medication or other meds?

Well, darlin’, like I always say, we are what we eat…or in this case…what we consume.

facial006.jpegAbsolutely, you can be assured that there are trace amounts of unmetabolized drugs — pharmaceutical as well as recreational — in cum. This is not as much of a concern for jizz lappers, like you, as it is for piss guzzlers. But you oughtn’t fool yourself into thinking there will be no residue.

Here are some fun spooge facts. It’s protein, baby! And It contains only about 12 to 15 calories per cum shot. That’s same amount found in an egg white.

Alcohol, drugs and nicotine will make a guy’s spooge bitter. If you want your spooge to be sweet tasting, void junk foods and have lots of fruits and greens in your diet instead. Fruit juices like pineapple, citrus, and cranberry are also known to make cum taste sweeter. The higher the sugar content; melon, mango, apple, or grape, the sweeter the spooge. Likewise, vegetables like parsley and celery are also recommended. And just so you know, consumption of these things, even 20 minutes before a blow job can effect the taste of the cum produced.

— — And ya know what? The same is true for effecting the taste of pussy juice. How sweet is that? — —

Avoid fish and red meat, they produce a bitter, fishy taste because of their alkaline content. Chemically-processed alcohol can also make your joy juice taste bitter. Naturally fermented drinks are less likely to do so. Garlic and onion are likely to produce strong odors in your spunk since they are high in sulfur; so lay off these. And of course, asparagus is to be avoided pre-blowjob too.

Good luck ya’ll

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