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One third of young people consider themselves gay or bisexual: study

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By Andrea Downey

A third of young people describe themselves as gay or bisexual, a new survey has revealed.

Whereas just seven percent of baby boomers are equally attracted to both sexes or “mostly” attracted to the opposite sex — marking a stark generational shift.

About 14 percent of those aged 16 to 22 say they are mostly attracted to the opposite sex, while nine percent say they are equally attracted to both sexes.

And just one percent of baby boomers said they were attracted to both sexes.

The generational shift in sexuality was shown in research carried out for the BBC by polling company Ipsos Mori.

They asked 1,000 young people aged 16 to 22 and 672 baby boomers — people in their 50s and 60s — about their sexual preferences.

About 66 percent of young people said they were only heterosexual, compared to 88 percent of baby boomers.

The pollsters also asked samples of Gen Z (1990s to mid-2000s,) millennials and Gen X (1961-1981) about their sexual orientation.

Among Gen Z 24 percent said they were equally attracted to both sexes or mostly attracted to the opposite sex.

Some 18 percent of Gen Y said they were equally attracted to both sexes or mostly attracted to the opposite sex with 71 percent saying they were only attracted to the opposite sex.

And in Gen X eight percent said they were mostly attracted to the opposite sex or equally attracted to both, with 85 percent saying they were only heterosexual.

Some 85 percent of Gen X, the generation that came after the baby boomers, said they were only heterosexual.

The number of people saying they are only heterosexual has gradually reduced through the generations.

But the “boxes” of heterosexual or homosexual simply “don’t fit human sexuality,” according to sex therapist Louise Mazanti.

She said: “Yes, we’re seeing a trend of questioning the norms of sexual orientation. Young people are increasingly resisting the confinement of being defined as either hetero or homosexual.”

“These boxes simply don’t fit human sexuality and never did.”

“In my opinion, they are entirely man-made.”

“It’s time to admit that we might have sexual gender preferences, but if we gave ourselves permission it’s never the genitals that define who we are attracted to.”

Complete Article HERE!

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8 Things Bisexual People Are Tired of Hearing

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It’s NOT a phase.

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It has been almost two years since I came out as bisexual, and I have never been happier. My bi identity is incredibly important to me and I can honestly say that I would not change my sexual orientation even if I did have the choice. As much as I love being bi, there are still rough days. Like all identities within the LGBTQ+ community, being bi comes with plenty of annoying misconceptions that I’d rather ignore, but still we have to talk about these misconceptions in order to spread awareness that they are not only inaccurate, but also hurtful. Here are 8 misconceptions that bisexuals are tired of hearing.

Being bisexual means that you are half gay and half straight.

I get that this probably seems very logical to a person who is not attracted to people of multiple gender identities, but this is just not correct. You can be half Polish and half Irish. You can be a half sibling. You cannot be half of one sexual orientation and half of another. That’s not how this works. Bisexuality is not a combination of two sexualities; someone who is bi is whole in their identity. Saying otherwise invalidates their sexuality. As Berly R., who is a college senior, tells Teen Vogue, “it’s frustrating that there always has to be a line to that heterosexuality. I am bisexual, meaning that I am 100% bisexual.”

You have straight sex when you’re with someone of the opposite gender and you have gay sex with someone of the same gender.

Um, no. Incorrect. This statement is insinuating that a bi person’s sexuality changes based on who they’re sleeping with. It doesn’t. While sexuality is fluid and could potentially change over time, it doesn’t suddenly change based on the gender of the person you are having sex with. I am bi when I sleep with a girl, a boy, someone who is agender, someone who is gender nonconforming, etc. This statement is also insinuating that there are two genders, which is incorrect. But I will address this in the next statement.

Bisexuality is not an inclusive sexual identity.

When people hear the prefix “bi,” they automatically assume it means that the person is only attracted to men and women. While that may have been the original definition of the sexual orientation, times have changed and people understand that there are more than two genders. Today, many people define bisexuality as being attracted to people of similar gender identities to theirs and gender identities that are different than theirs. There are many gender identities out there and a bi person can choose to date someone who identifies with any of them. “Those who say it’s not inclusive are stuck on an outdated definition”, college sophomore Catie P. tells Teen Vogue. If you want a quality definition of bisexuality, check out Robyn Ochs’ definition of the term. She is an amazing bi activist who knows what she is talking about.

People who are bisexual only identify that way because they are greedy.

I have never understood this misconception. I mean, yes, I’m sure there are plenty of greedy bisexuals out there. But, I am positive that there are also plenty of straight people who are greedy, too. The two are unrelated. The label we each choose to use to describe our attractions to people does not inherently dictate that we want to engage in more sex. Our label just describes the people we are attracted to; that’s it. But if bisexual people want to engage in more sex, that’s our choice too.

In itself, the term “greedy” is problematic. People can choose how much sex they have, and whether it’s more or less than other people doesn’t say anything about them. Having sex with people doesn’t make someone of any orientation “greedy.”

Bisexuals are more likely to cheat.

ANYONE can cheat on their significant other(s); straight people can, gay people can, pansexual people can. You get the picture. My attraction to people of multiple gender identities does not make me more likely to cheat. With that logic, then people who do not identify as bisexual would never cheat, because the decision to cheat on your partner(s) would boil down to being bi. Obviously that is not true because I know multiple people who are not bisexual and have cheated on their significant other. College sophomore Kate S. tells Teen Vogue that she especially hates this stereotype because “you get [hate] from both sides… Lesbians are worried you’ll cheat because you miss guys, and guys are thinking that they need to be twice as overprotective and controlling because both guys and girls could ‘steal’ you away.” You cheat because you make the choice to do so, end of story.

All bisexuals are into polyamorous relationships.

Nope, not even close. While there are many bisexuals who are involved or would be willing to be involved in a polyamorous relationship, there are also many bisexuals who do not wish to be in a polyamorous relationship. I am one of them. The type of relationship setting someone is looking for is not dictated by who they are attracted to.

You are only bisexual if you have dated all of the different gender identities you are attracted to.

No, no, no, and no. Just no. Is a person any less gay if they have never dated someone of the same gender? Is a person any less straight if they haven’t dated anyone at all? This statement is born out of ignorance, plain and simple. A person knows who they are attracted to, regardless of who they choose to date in the end. For example, I have been attracted to multiple nonbinary people over the years. It just so happens that I never had the opportunity to date any of them. I still knew I was attracted to them, I just didn’t act on that attraction.

Bisexuality is just a phase.

This misconception is often the most hurtful in comparison to the rest of the ones listed here. Telling someone that their sexual orientation is a phase is invalidating. I have no doubt that there are people who used “bisexual” as their label for a period of time in their life, before moving on to a different label. Still, that’s no less legitimate. For over a decade, I thought I was straight. It was the label I used until I found a different label that better explained the attractions I felt toward other people. As we grow and learn more about sexuality and gender, we are better able to identify exactly how we feel, and that’s OK.

Complete Article HERE!

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What it’s like to talk to your doctor about sexual health when you’re bisexual

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There’s a misconception that bi people are just going through a phase — but what if our doctors believe it too?

“Are you sexually active?”

I’d been dreading this question since losing my virginity to a female friend a few weeks earlier, not long after my 16th birthday. Somehow, the harsh fluorescent lights in my doctor’s examination room made this query seem even more menacing.

“Yes,” I said, but there was an ellipsis in my voice. A hesitation. An unspoken “but . . . ”

“You’re using condoms, right? So you don’t get pregnant?” she prompted, and I didn’t know what to say, because we weren’t. We didn’t need to. It was the wrong question.

“Uh, I’m not having sex with a guy,” I managed to stammer.

My doctor peered at me over her wire-rim glasses, “Oh,” she replied.

There are a lot of things a teenager might be nervous to disclose to their doctor — a marijuana habit, some worrying mental health symptoms, a secret relationship their parents don’t know about. While we should all feel free to tell our doctors what’s really going on with us, it’s particularly egregious that so many of them are still in the dark about something so basic as sexual orientation, making these already-difficult situations even more challenging.

The day of my first difficult conversation about my sexual health, my doctor didn’t give me any medical advice on the sex I was having. She didn’t suggest my partner and I use dental dams or latex gloves. She didn’t suggest we get tested for sexually transmitted infections (STIs). She didn’t ask whether my partner was cis or trans. She didn’t ask what sexual orientation I identified as (bisexual, for the record). She didn’t even ask me if I had any questions for her. She just moved on to the next part of our checkup.

I didn’t recognize these as problems at the time; I was too young and nervous to question the approach of my all-knowing doctor. Everything I later learned about safer sex — with the other cis girl I was seeing at that time, and with other partners later on — I learned from the internet. And while the internet can be a great resource for such information, doctors should be a better one.

Bisexuals are told all the time — both implicitly and explicitly — that we’re not queer enough to align ourselves with queerness, or that we’re too queer to align ourselves with straightness. I still find it hard to push back against these stereotypes today, at 25.

These presumptions are particularly upsetting in medical situations, where many of us already feel nervous and unempowered and, for many queers, apprehensive. The medical system has oftentimes failed us and our queer foreparents: inequitable health care access due to poverty, doctors’ lack of knowledge about LGBT identities and sexuality and the pathologization of queerness are just a few examples.

Two years later, in a different relationship with a person of a different gender, I returned to my doctor. I was a girl on a mission.

“I’m seeing someone new and I’d like to get an IUD,” I told my doc, with all the bravery and resolve I could muster as a meek 18-year-old still coming to terms with her sexuality.

“I thought you were a lesbian?” she replied coolly, barely looking up from her computer screen.

“No, I’m bisexual,” I clarified, my voice only shaking a little.

Medically speaking, it shouldn’t actually matter what word(s) I use to define my sexual orientation; my doctor should want to know, instead, what sexual activities I am participating in. I could’ve been a lesbian having sex with a man (they do exist!). I could’ve been having sex with a trans woman or a nonbinary person who had the ability to get me pregnant. There was no reason for my doctor to assume I was a lesbian in the first place, nor that a risk of pregnancy during sex meant my existing sexual orientation was being challenged.

I was reminded of a story I had read online. An American photographer I followed, Brigid Marz, wrote on Flickr that she and her girlfriend went to a hospital to get treatment for her flu symptoms. A staff member asked Brigid if there was any chance she might be pregnant, and she laughed, indicated her girlfriend, and said no. She’d dated and had sex with men before, but not recently enough that she could be pregnant. Months later, she received a $700 medical bill, $300 of which was for a pregnancy test she’d neither authorized nor needed.

“I am so sick of being treated differently just because I have boobs,” she wrote, but I would argue she was treated differently because she is non-monosexual – she is neither completely straight nor completely gay. Our medical system seems to assume everyone is one or the other, sometimes even when we’re loudly asserting otherwise.

In the end, my doctor refused to prescribe me an IUD on the basis that I was “just casually dating” and should wait until I was “in a serious relationship” before committing to a long-term birth control method that reflected my relationship status. She prescribed me the pill instead — the hormonal content of which exacerbated my mental health conditions for years, something the non-hormonal copper IUD may not have done.

What rankled me was that I was in a serious relationship at the time. My doctor may have assumed my relationship was casual because I was now with a man and I was previously with a woman, or she may have simply thought I was too young for the IUD — but I think it was because of negative stereotypes about bisexual people.

Bi folks’ relationships and attractions are often written off as “just a phase” or “just for fun.” We’re told we don’t know what we really want or who we really like — or, worse, that we’re intentionally playing with partners’ hearts, never intending to pursue commitment or depth in our relationships.

In my experience, this is about as true for bisexual people as it is for straight or gay people — some folks are looking for serious relationships and some just aren’t — but this assumption weighs most heavily on bisexuals. Whether or not my doctor was consciously aware of the stereotypes she was affirming that day, it’s clear to me that my relationship would not have been written off as “casual” if I identified as straight or gay.

If I could go back and talk to myself when I was a shy and shaking 16-year-old in my doctor’s office, I’d tell her to advocate for herself. I’d tell her to ask the questions she wanted answered, and double-check the answers on Scarleteen later. I’d tell her it was okay if she didn’t even know what questions to ask.

I’d tell her to be unashamed of her burgeoning bisexual identity, because it’s nothing to feel shifty about. But mostly, I’d wish I didn’t have to tell her all these things. Her doctor shouldn’t have made her doubt all this in the first place.

Complete Article HERE!

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Seven things you didn’t know about bisexual health

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by Helen Parshall

Bisexual Health Awareness Month is dedicated to raising awareness about the startling disparities that the bisexual community faces in terms of both physical and mental health. When compared against statistics for both heterosexual populations and their lesbian and gay peers, startling trends emerge in both social, economic, and health inequities.

Here are seven things you probably didn’t know about bisexual health:

  1. HRC’s 2014 report, Supporting and Caring for Our Bisexual Youth, found that when compared to their lesbian and gay peers, bisexual, queer and pansexual youth were more likely to experience being excluded and harassed, less likely to have caring adults to turn to if they felt sad and less likely to report feeling happy.
  2. The Movement Advancement Project’s 2016 report, Invisible Majority: The Disparities Facing Bisexual People and How To Remedy Them, found significantly lower rates of graduation and college attendance among bisexual students. Bisexual-identified people were approximately 47 percent less likely to enroll in college than respondents who identified as straight.
  3. Pew Research Center found in its 2013 Survey of LGBT Americans that while 77 percent of gay men and 71 percent of lesbians say that “most or all of the important people in their lives know of their sexual orientation” only 28 percent of bisexual people report being out.
  4. According to the Bisexual Resource Center (BRC), 45 percent of bisexual women have considered or attempted suicide, followed by bisexual men (35 percent), lesbians (30 percent), gay men (25 percent), and much lower rates for straight women and men.
  5. At the historic first White House Roundtable on Bisexual Issues in 2013, the Bisexual Resource Center shared that bisexual women are twice as likely to have an eating disorder than lesbians.
  6. In partnership with BRC, BiNetUSA and the Bisexual Organizing Project, HRC Foundation’s issue brief, Health Disparities Among Bisexual People, highlighted these disparities, which include higher rates of cancer, heart disease and obesity, and higher rates of HPV and other sexual health issues, likely stemming from a lack of access to preventative care and not being out to medical providers.
  7. The Williams Institute found that 39 percent of bisexual men and 33 percent of bisexual women reported not disclosing their sexual orientation to any medical provider, compared to only 13 percent of gay men and 10 percent of lesbians who chose not to disclose.

Complete Article HERE!

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Worried your partner might have a bisexual history? Why?

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Myths about LGBTQ sexual health need debunking – and healthcare professionals are part of the problem

‘You don’t have to openly identify as bisexual to get the bad side of bisexuality.’

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“Use a condom, the pill, or get an IUD – avoid pregnancy” was the drill from sexual health practitioners who came to speak at my comprehensive school in Kent. There wasn’t much detail or thought beyond, “Some of these boys are going to get some of these girls pregnant before they hit 16 – let’s try to get that down to a lower number than we had last year.”

Thankfully, when it comes to the subject of sexual identity, there’s now more guidance than ever trickling down into the societal subconscious in the west – hopefully in schools, but certainly during publicity rounds for films starring Kelly Rowland and Cat Deeley. While talking about Love By the 10th Date to the New York Post last week, Rowland espoused the importance of knowledge when embarking on a sexual relationship with another: “I can’t tell someone how to feel about dating someone who is bisexual or had a past gay experience, but it’s proper to ask [if they have] in today’s times.”

It is “proper” to ask? Maybe it’s unfortunate phrasing, or maybe not being able to hear the tone of voice in which the opinion was offered gives it negative impact, but the sentence rings faintly of suspicion and mild disapproval: “Please submit your history of sex with people of the same gender, and it will then be decided whether or not you are too risky to be intimate with.” That’s how it comes across to this particular someone who is “bisexual or [has] had a past gay experience”, anyway.

Bisexuality just continues to have a bad rep, even though it’s on the rise (according to CNN) … or then again, maybe it’s not on the rise (according to the Verge). Statistics on the spread of sexually transmitted diseases, and which groups of people are spreading them, are easily found (and quickly wielded by those mistrustful of anything beyond heteronormativity), but they can obscure a simple and universal truth that applies to all groups, whether those groups are on the rise or not. And that is: whatever genitalia you and your partner(s) have, you should protect yourselves (condom/dental dam/wash your hands and accoutrement between uses, thank you). Ignoring that fact in favour of “it’s the bisexuals, mostly” is the source of so much harm.

You don’t have to openly identify as bisexual to get the bad side of bisexuality, because it goes beyond the myths of promiscuity, greed and dishonesty still held by some – biphobia also has an impact on physical health. Here in the UK, if you’re a man who’s had sex with another man in the last 12 months, you can’t donate blood (though that stance is currently being reviewed). Women who have sex with women are less likely to get a smear test, because many of us don’t realise we need to – we’re forgotten by the healthcare system, or our needs are misunderstood.

“Gay and bisexual women are at lower risk for HPV,” we confidently tell each other, “we don’t need a smear test.” A lot of us have heard that from our doctors, as well. It was only after seeing a leaflet about the issue from lgbthealth.org.uk during this month’s Cervical Cancer Prevention Week that I realised this was just ignorance.

In 2008, Stonewall released findings that one in 50 lesbian and bisexual women had been refused a smear test, even when they requested one. The 2015 survey on training gaps in healthcare, Unhealthy Attitudes, found that three in four patient-facing staff had not received any training on the health needs of LGBTQ people. Many women get variations of the “use a condom, the pill, or get an IUD – avoid pregnancy” mantra from our doctors to this day, if we don’t declare our gayness or bisexuality as we walk through the surgery door. Sometimes even a declaration is ignored by an uncomfortable practitioner. Straightness is still automatically assumed, unless you’re lucky enough to have a doctor who doesn’t see heterosexuality as the default for everyone they treat.

According to that 2015 Stonewall study, a third of healthcare professionals felt that the NHS and social care services should be doing more to meet the needs of LGBTQ patients, which is encouraging. Knowledge is wanted – needed – to undo the harmful myths that block help and prevent education. And that is what is “proper” (to quote the star of Freddy vs Jason and Love By the 10th Date) – fighting ignorance and biphobia, rather than continuing to be suspicious of sexual histories that might have featured people of the same gender. Whatever and whoever is in our sexual pasts, we must protect each other, and stay informed. That’s healthy.

Complete Article HERE!

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