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A BEAUTYFUL HANDFUL – Goldfrau

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REVIEW #30

Hey sex fans,

Today we have something extraordinary indeed.

Over the last several months The Dr Dick Review Crew has had the pleasure of reviewing several exquisite high-end insertables made from some surprising materials. Among them — Pyrex glass, medical grade silicone, wood and even aircraft-quality spun aluminum.  Besides being fun and functional; each and every one of these lovelies is also an exceptional work of art.  Today we add porcelain to that list of exceptional materials.

Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18, 23, 24, 27. 28

Goldfrau — Miss Pink $240
Gina & Kevin introduce us to the Goldfrau .

Gina:  “If I were to try to design the perfect dildo, I couldn’t do better than this Australian company has done with their signature product — Goldfrau.  It’s simply perfect and perfectly simple.  It’s delightfully sensual; it’s beautiful art; it’s creatively innovative and it is GREEN!  I know I’m gushing, but my Goldfrau is stunning.”
Kevin:  “Gina’s right; I’m blown away too.”
Gina:  “I admit, at first I was a little skeptical. Porcelain is ceramic, of course, and all I could think of was how fragile that would make it.  I had the vision of a fine porcelain doll in mind.  I was oh so wrong.  After a little research, I discovered that stoneware ceramics, like this, are exceptionally durable and versatile.   There are ceramic knives, ceramic engines parts and the space shuttle’s exterior is made of ceramic tiles.”
Kevin:  “The ceramic used in crafting the Goldfrau will not chip, crack, or break miss-pinkunder normal use.  And you’re gonna want to treat this baby with loving care, not because it’s fragile, but because it is a stunning work of art”
Gina:  “Check this out!  The Goldfrau comes wrapped in this handsome lined soft leather pouch that just screams elegance.  The Miss Pink Goldfrau I have is cream-colored porcelain with an intricate lavender lace pattern on it. The shaft is absolutely smooth and it’s just a tad short of 9″ long.  It has a real nice heft to it too; nearly 10 ounces.”
Kevin:  “It’s shaped like a baseball bat with a rounded handle, which makes for easy handling even when lubed.  We discovered that a little lube went a very long way.  And you can use any type of lube you want with this porcelain beauty.”
Gina:  “Here’s a really neat feature I discovered. Despite the straight shaft, the Goldfrau is perfect for G-spot stimulation.  It’s odd, because most of the other G-spot stimulators I’ve seen or used have a curve to them. The Goldfrau does not.”
Kevin:  “Yeah, I feel confident using this thing on Gina without fear of injuring her.  Those curved dildos can sometime get turned around in her pussy and when the curve is pointing opposite to the G-spot that can hurt.”
Gina:  “I also really like the fact that I can warm and chill the Goldfrau to suit my mood.  It’s very easy to do.  You can chill it in the refrigerator for a few minutes or warm it by running hot water over it.”
Kevin:  “And it changes temperature very quickly.  So get this, one evening I ltr_pouchblindfolded Gina and restrained her spread-eagle on the bed.  I had a bowl of ice water and a bowl of hot water next to the bed.  I teased and tormented her clit and pussy with surprises in varying temperatures.  She got so wet I had to get down on all fours and lapped up all her sweet juices.  And you can use either end of the Goldfrau for wicked pleasure”
Gina:  “I have to admit, not knowing what was coming next — cold or hot drove me wild.  I was so totally turned on.  And I don’t think I ever lubricated that much in my life.  My man knows how to push my buttons.”
Kevin:  “While we were doing this hot/cold thing I made up a story about an beautiful Chinese princess who had been abducted by a cruel warlord and was being tortured into submission.  The warlord would fuck the princess wildly with an exquisite…wait for it…ancient porcelain dildo.”
Gina:  “As you can see, Kevin’s been reading too much erotica. But I did love his story.  And being blindfolded and restrained only intensified the experience.”
Kevin:  “Hey, there’s no such thing as too much erotica.”
Gina:  “You’re right, hon; you can tell me dirty stories anytime.  Just make sure the Goldfrau is near at hand.  I also want to mention that the Goldfrau, I guess because of its heft, fills me up more than it’s girth would suggest.”
Kevin:  “Ya know what?  I think the Goldfrau people should work on developing a similar porcelain toy just for us ass-centric men.  I mean a guy could use one of these on himself to great effect.  I’m just thinking something more along the lines of a hefty porcelain butt plug would totally rock.”
Gina:  “Clean up is easy with mild soap and warm water. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too.  You can serialize it in boiling water for a minute or two, or pop it in the dishwasher with all your other fine china.”
Kevin:  “Guys, if you want to show your Valentine just how special she is; the Goldfrau is the idea gift.  It’s a little pricey, but you know your gal is worth it.  Besides, you’ll not find its equal anywhere else.”
Gina:  “And gals, if you buy only one new pleasure instrument this year; make sure it is a Goldfrau.  You will forever thank me for this tip; I promise.”

ENJOY

…full review here


drdickvod.jpg

A Thrill A Minute

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REVIEW #29

Sex Fans,

The Dr Dick Review Crew is BACK! We’re all rested and relaxed and ready to tackle whatever cums our way.

We begin 2009 with a bang.  We have three vibes from Synergy Erotic.  They’re a relatively new company with a wonderful corporate philosophy, which includes everything from quality manufacturing to subtle yet effective packaging.  Good for them!

This week’s Review Crew includes:
Angie — Reviews #12, 16, 26
Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18, 23. 24, 27
Jada — Reviews #14, 16, 20

Luscious Thrill-Her, Lavender $18.99

Angie introduces us to Luscious Thrill-Her.

Angie:
This is a sweet and petite personal vibrator (5 1/2 inch long and 1 1/2 inch in diameter).  It features a small diameter, which is ideal for the novice user.  Luscious Thrill-Her is perfect for both anal stimulation and vaginal stimulation.  It has a solid vibrator core that is encased in a sensual outer skin made of a product called Ultra-Gelle.  It is soft, pliable and very comfortable to use.

luscious

I tried to do a little behind the scenes sleuthing to ferret-out what this Ultra-Gelle is composed of, but I wasn’t successful.  I am generally wary of new materials that might contain hazardous or allergenic materials.  I was delighted to see that Ultra-Gelle is Phthalate free.  Thank you for that!  It says so right on the package, which is good for marketing.  I always look for that designation on any soft material, like Ultra-Gelle.  And so should you; especially if the toy is intended for insertion.  I am unable to say if Ultra-Gelle is latex-free or not.  If you have a latex allergy, you might contact the manufacturer for more information before you buy.  That’s always the safest bet.

Luscious Thrill-Her has several features I like very much.  First, it is waterproof, so it’s great to use in the bath.  It also has a rheostat type speed adjustment that allows one to vary the vibration.  This toy should only be used with water-based lube, however.

Clean up is easy; mild soap and warm water does just fine. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too.

Luscious Thrill-Her runs on 2 ‘AAA’ Batteries, but the first set of batteries is not included in the package. This is a pet peeve for everyone on Dr Dick’s Review Crew.  We feel as though no one should be creating battery-operated toys without including the first set of batteries in the package.

Luscious Thrill-Her comes in several fetching colors.  I confidently recommend this petite insertable.”

Full review HERE.

Squirmy Touch-Me, Lavender    $24.99

Glenn & Hank introduce us to the Squirmy Touch-Me.

Glenn:  “Hey, ya wanna see my pink penis?”
Hank:  “Actually, it’s lavender, dude; not pink.”
Glenn:  “Oh, ok!  Hey, ya wanna see my lavender penis?”
Hank:  “Why are you always so wacky?”
Glenn:  “Ahhh, because god made me that way?  Besides, were talking about toys, aren’t we?  That call for a little levity, right?”  😉

squrmy

Hank:  “Alright then, let’s have it your way.  So Glenn, why don’t you show us your pretty new lavender penis.”
Glenn:  “Maybe I will.  Squirmy Touch-Me is 8 1/2 inch of vibrating cock.  It even looks like a cock. And when I’m buggerin’ myself, or having someone else cornholein’ me; I like the weapon of ass-destruction to look like a cock, OK?  I’m old fashioned that way.  If you don’t like your toys to look like a wang; that’s fine with me.  But I do; so there!  And check this out; Squirmy Touch-Me has a flexible shaft that bends then holds its shape.  I absolutely love it!”
Hank:  “Squirmy Touch-Me has this very interesting articulated spine so that the vibrating tip reaches your prostate (or G-spot) each and every time.  Then it does a little dance that’ll really put a smile on your face.”
Glenn:  “It has the same Ultra-Gelle skin, as the product Angie showed you earlier.  I like the feel of it in my hands, but even more so up my ass.”
Hank: “The same cleaning instructions that Angie gave you apply to the Squirmy Touch-Me, so I won’t repeat them.  But I do want to emphasize the water-based lube precaution.  You wouldn’t want to mess up this toy with a silicone-based or oil-based lube.”
Glenn:  “It’s waterproof, which I really love.  Rammin’ this baby home in the shower in the morning makes the perfect start to each and every day.  Oh, and it two speeds — yummy and even more yummier.”
Hank:  “We want to second what Angie said about the batteries.  When we’re faced with a choice of toys of equal worth; one with batteries in the package and one without; we always choose the one with batteries.  We want to support the companies who are going the extra mile.”
Glenn:  “Considering the price of this puppy, it’s a great starter vibrating dildo for anyone lookin for a little Gelle fun.”

Full review HERE.

Vibe-Me Massager, Luster Blue    $11.99

Jada introduces us to the Vibe-Me Massager.

Jada
Isn’t this a beauty?  It’s so shiny and sleek.  It looks like it’s made of metal, but it’s not.  The Vibe-Me Massager is an 8-inch hard plastic bodied waterproof vibrator.  There’s nothing soft of squishy here.  It contains a powerful motor, yet it is very quiet.  I really appreciate that.  I hate it when toys are loud enough to wake the dead.

vibe-me

The Vibe-Me Massager has several features I liked very much.  Like the two other vibes that we are featuring today, mine is also waterproof.  Angie, Glenn and I agree that a waterproof vibe is so convenient to use when one is already naked…like in the bath.  It also has a rheostat type speed adjustment that allows one to vary the vibration, just like the one Angie showed you.

Because the Vibe-Me Massager is non-porous, you can use any sort of personal lube you’d like with this toy.   I’m partial to silicone-based lube, so that’s what I use.  But water-based lube works equally well. The Vibe-Me Massager will stay slick either way.

Clean up is easy — mild soap and warm water works fine.  But you can sanitize more fully with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution.  This is a highly recommended procedure if you will be sharing your toys.

The bullet shape makes insertion effortless.  And I must say I love the metallic blue color, it’s so pretty.

Unlike my friend Glenn here, I have a preference for a less penis identifiable shape to my dildos.  So does my husband.  I’m sure I would feel the same way he does if I were a man using an insertable on a woman.  Who needs the obvious comparison between the dildo and the real thing?

And just to make it unanimous, I concur with everyone else on the battery issue.”

Full review HERE.

ENJOY!

Cum All Ye Faithful

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REVIEW #26

Hey sex fans,

Holy cow!  It’s Week 2 of our Holiday Extravaganza.  Did you somehow miss Week 1 of this amazing panoply?  Shame on you!  Check out REVIEW #25 if ya did.

As you know, the Dr Dick Review Crew is throwing our product review apparatus into high gear.  We want to get as many reviews out there as possible before the end of the year.  We certainly don’t want to leave you hanging…as to what is hot and juicy in the holiday gift giving department, don’t cha know.

This week’s Review Crew include:

  • Tag — First Posted Review
  • Me, Dr Dick — Reviews #1 – 5, 7 – 10, 12, 14, 15, 19, 21, 25
  • Angie — Reviews #12, 16
  • Christa — First Posted Review

First up is Tag, who introduces us to two glass dildos from Don Wands — The Cobalt Blue Smooth Vibrating Glass Wand and the Pink Nubby Rocket.
Cobalt Blue Smooth Vibrating Glass Wand $79.99

My name is Tag and this is my first published outing with the Dr Dick Review Crew. Dr Dick and I go way back, but that’s another story all together.

cobalt.jpg

The Cobalt Blue Smooth Vibrating Glass Wand is waterproof and like all glass dildos it’s hypo-allergenic, nonporous, ultra-smooth and very durable. I really appreciated the fact that the first set of batteries (2 AA’s) were included in the package. There’s nothing I hate more than bringing home a battery-operated toy only to discover that the batteries are not included. There oughta be a law against that!

Anyhow, I’m no stranger to glass insertables. In fact, I have an absolutely stunning one that DD gave me last spring. It’s hard (no pun intended) not to make a comparison between the first one and these two. But before we get to that, let’s evaluate the two Don Wands glass dildos on their own merits.

Read more of this review here

Pink Nubby Rocket $29.99pink.jpg

Tag: I almost got myself off with ‘Big Blue’, when I happened to look over and see the slightly more petite pink puppy waiting to take me for a ride. I carefully released my grip on ‘Big Blue’, clamped down to stem the tide of my building orgasm and turned my attention to the Pink Nubby Rocket.

Actually Pink Nubby Rocket isn’t so little. Approximately 7 ” in length and 1″ in diameter; this rose-colored dong features a nicely curved shaft with a whole lot of nubbies. It has a nice base to hold on to for pumping in and out and directing the head to your P-spot (or G-spot).

Read more of this review here

Next, Angie and I introduce three delicious products from the oh so creative people at Earthly Body — A Massage Body Candle — Naked in the Woods, an Edible Candle — Watermelon and an Aromatherapy Candle — Melt Away.

Aromatherapy Earthly Body Candle — Melt Away 6 oz. $15.99

One of the best things about being Dr Dick is sharing the bounteous melt-away-hi-res.jpgproducts sent to me for review with my Review Crew.  It’s like bein’ friggin’ Santa Claus all year long.  Despite my exceptionally big heart there are always some pangs of envy as I see a product I covet go off to a new home in the hot little hands of one of my posse.  Generosity is so bittersweet.

I had the damnedest time trying to choose among these Earthly Body products.  Each one is a mini treasure.  But since I am an avid practitioner of massage and bodywork I chose the Aromatherapy Earthly Body Candle — Melt Away as my keeper…

Read more of this review here

Heart-Shaped Massage Body Candle — Naked in the Woods 6 oz. $15.99

Edible Candle — Watermelon 4 oz. $15.99

Angie: I couldn’t agree more with the Dr D! I was thrilled when asked to round-massage-med-res.jpgreview these two candles — the Heart-Shaped Massage Body Candle — Naked in the Woods and the Edible Candle — Watermelon. They are scrumptious.

I have very sensitive skin, so I have to be very careful what products I use. Initially, I was concerned that fragranced products, like these, would not sit well on my skin. So I decided to visit the Earthly Body website and do some homework before my first use. I was delighted to learn that all their products are vegan and nontoxic.

My first use was right after my bath. I lit a candle, which fragranced the room while I enjoyed my bath. Naked in the Woods has a light earthy sent with just a hint of pine. the Edible Candle — Watermelon is…well all edible-watermelon-candle-hi-res.jpgwatermelon-y. Is there such a word? Depending on my mood, I had a choice between earthy and fruity. By the time if finished my bath, there was enough liquefied oil to generously moisturize my legs. This is a much finer oil than what I usually use, so much more silky.

Read more of this review here

And now for something completely different!  Our next line of products will be introduced by a newcomer to the Review Crew — Christa.

Here’s the thing.  The exceptionally irreverent and downright blasphemous folks are Divine Interventions have cum up with a line of exquisite silicone insertables.  You say; “Ok Dr Dick, we loves us some silicone dildos!”  Yeah, everyone on the Review Crew said the same thing.

But not so fast, since these remarkable insertables are fashioned in a most unorthodox manner (to say the least) no crew member had the audacity to take them on.  That is until Joy turned me on to her 20-something goth-chick pal, Christa.  She was like totally down with the whole sacrilegious concept, as you will see.

Diving Nun $59

Christa here!  I can’t believe that you’re just gonna fork over three totally nun.jpgbitchin’, top of the line, high-grade silicone toys, like for free.  And the fact that these babies skewer the whole religion thing makes ‘em even hotter.
So ok, I can see where these are not for everyone.  People are so fuckin’ uptight about shit like this.  But like I said, that only makes them more of a turn on for me.

Take the Diving Nun for instance.  This is a no nonsense dong, 7-3/4” tall with a 1-3/4” diameter.  This will fill you up.  It comes in lots of hot colors.  Mine is appropriately virgin Mary blue.  What’s so great about this particular dildo is that it has a suction base.  It’ll stick to the floor, if you’re takin it up the ass or to the wall if you wanna hands-free pussy-fuck yourself.  Now, that’s what I call versatile!  I had my way with this thing in the shower the other day and I’m still walkin’ funny today…

Read more of this review here

Baby Jesus Butt Plug $35baby.jpg

I saved the Baby Jesus Butt Plug for my sub, butt-boy BF, Alex.  He is like this total ass whore.  I was the first girlfriend he ever had that fingered his hole and played with his prostate.  Now it’s ‘fuck me, fuck me, fuck me’ all the time.  This butt plug is perfect for keeping him stuffed and horny so that he gets me off a bunch of times before he does himself.  And I can just lay back and enjoy.  If you have an ass-hungry man in your life, or you are ass-hungry yourself and you’d get off even more by shovin’ an icon where the sun don’t shine; this is the plug for you…

Read more of this review here

Jackhammer Jesus $65jack.jpg

The ultimate in blasphemy!  Ever get in the mood to go like all Linda Blair in the Exorcist?  Frankly I hadn’t ever thought about it till I discovered that my Jackhammer Jesus is a silicone crucifix with a beautiful dickhead at the foot of the cross. Then all manner of wickedness crossed (no pun intended) my mind.

This beauty rivals the Diving Nun in size, 7-1/2” tall by 1-3/4” diameter. It’s not as versatile as the Nun, because it doesn’t have a suction base.  But Jackhammer Jesus is even more twisted…

Read more of this review here

Ace In The Hole

Name: Kevin
Gender: Male
Age: 22
Location: Toronto
I’m just out of college and have a ton of bills and no real job prospects at the moment. A friend suggested I do some escorting to make ends meet. Guys tell me that I’m hot and I like sex, but I don’t know if I could pull it off. Suggestions?

You betcha I have suggestions…a lot of ‘em, don’t ‘cha know.

Being hot and liking sex are great assets if you decide to turn pro, but you’ll need way more than that. Being a sex worker is not like having sex for love or even having recreational sex. You will be exchanging sex for money and that makes it a business proposition. Therefore you’d be wise to approach this with as much forethought as you would any other career move. It is, after all, the world’s oldest profession.

abs.jpgIf you do decide to set up shop, so to speak, you’ll need the capacity to have sex with a much wider range of people than if you were looking for a date. And probably just as important, when there’s an exchange of money, the john becomes your customer. And you know what they say about the customer always being right. The truth of the matter is that all pro sex is client directed. It’s not about you even when it looks like it’s all about you.

So let’s say you’re a really great fuck, fun to be with too. You’ll also need the emotional distance and psychological resilience to cope with the intimacy issues this line of work creates. This is precisely the point where most fledgling sex workers flounder. They either give too much or not enough. Some actually resent their clients for renting them. I know, this is totally absurd, but it happens all the time. This lack of clarity will cause you to have trouble establishing healthy boundaries between you and your john.

Regardless if you are a cheap street hustler turning tricks to support a drug habit or an expensive rent-boy who is servicing the rich and famous, the pitfalls are the same. A lot of sex workers are self-destructive or have huge unresolved sex issues that they try to compensate for by making people pay them for what they usually give away.

If you still think this is a line of work for you, Kevin, be aware that your mind and body are your greatest business assets. Take care of them. Nurture them. Keep them clean, fit and toned. Hygiene, both physical and mental, is a must. Body awareness, not the narcissistic type, and safe-sex practices are your frontline defense against STIs (sexually transmitted infections). Make it your business to be tested for HIV and the other common STIs on a regular (every 3-6 months) basis.

Stay clean and sober while on the job. More sex workers get busted for drugs rather than hustling. Know how to handle a drugged out client. You’ll probably see a lot of those. Know that they can take forever to get off, and can sometimes be paranoid and dangerous.

balls6.jpg

Speaking of getting busted; you know this line of work is against the law, don’t you. That of course doesn’t stop lots of people from plying their trade. But the successful ones will have their wits about them, particularly in terms of how they market themselves. Never suggest, in any forum — written or spoken, that you are offering sexual favors for money.

Be fiscally responsibility. Plan for the lean times…and there are always lean times. You’ll probably be a hot property at first; ya know the whole “new meat” phenomenon. Don’t let this go to your head. Count on there being cuter, younger, hotter competitors getting off the bus tomorrow. Try to cultivate a number of regular clients. Have a thought to how and where you will market yourself. And I fully encourage you not to do this full-time, at least not at first. If you find it difficult to meet your financial goals, you’ll be tempted to do more and more risky things just to make ends meet.

Sex work is often more about being psychologically present than a sexual performance. Your clients will often be more lonely and isolated then they are horny. Treat them with respect. Improve your mind. Make yourself interesting. Stay abreast on current affairs and the popular culture. Develop other skills like massage and bodywork.

You should have at least one trusted friend who knows your whereabouts at all times, or who has access to your appointment book. Protect yourself: use a pager or cell phone and never make a date with anyone who won’t share his/her phone number with you. Always make a call back before you head out. Keep an appointment book, in code if you must.

Carry a travel bag or backpack with you to all your “dates”. This should contain the basics: condoms, lube, massage oil, handi-wipes, toys, etc. But you should also have an extra shirt and mace (or other protective equipment). Keep all your belongings — clothing, phone, watch, and wallet — together and near your bag. Know where that bag is at all times and be ready to pick up and leave if there’s trouble.

I also suggest that you connect with other sex workers in your area. There is strength in numbers. Other rent-boys will provide you with essential information about troublesome clients and help you get the lay of the land, so to speak.

Finally, here’s a few of great resource for all sex workers — The Sex Workers Outreach Project, BAYSWAN, AIM and St James Infirmary.

Name: Clare
Gender: Female
Age: 40
Location: St Louis
My best friend can’t bring herself to sever her ties with her ex-boyfriend. Even though their last attempted reunion ended in a very violent fight. My friend has this weird nostalgia for the relationship she had with her ex at the beginning. Back then, before he started drinking and drugging, they did have a couple of good years, but that was a long time ago. I’m very concerned for my friend. She’s often depressed and she is pulling away from her friends. I think she is seriously considering getting back with her no-good, two-timing ex. I know that my role as a friend is to love and support her, but her ex is not to be trusted. I fear as much for her safety as for her heart. What’s a friend to do?

So many things are going on here, Clare. It’s hard to know where to begin. Your friend can’t sever her ties with her ex because she doesn’t want to. Even if she wanted to end it once and for all, it’s not an easy thing to do.

Anyone who has been there will tell ya that quitin’ a bad relationship is as difficult as quitin’ booze or dope…maybe even harder. Most folks in poisonous relationships can’t extricate themselves because they are part of the toxicity. Bad relationships, like the good ones, are completely dependent on the participation of both individuals in the couple. Each one feeds off the other and each one’s bad behaviors rewards and facilitates the pathologies of the other.

domistic_violence02.jpgThere is no such thing as a good, psychologically healthy person in a bad relationship. There may be one in the couple that is less culpable, or less abusive, or less self-destructive, but there is never one that is without blame.

Like all junkies, your friend is hooked. Her depression and withdrawal are outward signs of the pathology. Nothing is gonna change this for her until she acknowledges that she is caught in a downward spiral. Domestic violence — and we ought to label the nature of your friend’s relationship for what it is — will escalate. It always does. Will your friend get out in time? There’s no guarantee. Is there anything you can do? Well that, Clare, is a more difficult question to answer. If you do too much you are at risk of supporting her habit. Or worse, you could be co-opted into the pathological dynamic of the relationship.

The best you can do is to tell your friend how you feel about her predicament. Speak your mind in no uncertain terms. If you decide to confront your friend with an intervention, I suggest that you have some well-considered resources to hand her while you are doing so. For example, you could do some legwork and find a some local domestic violence resources — a hot line, a shelter, counseling referrals and the like. Once you make this intervention and it’s over; drop it. Drop it for good. This is the hardest thing a friend has to do, but constantly badgering someone in your friend’s condition is counterproductive. If you can’t stand to witness the self-destruction, take your leave of the friendship and hope for the best.

domistic_violence01.jpg

However you play this, don’t hold your breath for a happy ending. They happen sometime, of course, but real life is so not like the movies.

Name: Dena
Gender: Female
Age: 32
Location: NYC
I love my cunt. In fact you could say I have a cunt fetish. I love to stuff my cunt with really big toys. My current BF introduced me to fist fucking and I love it. I guess what I want to know is can this be dangerous?

I love it, a chick who refers to her pussy as a cunt! You go, girl!

But what’s this…you’re just now gettin’ around to askin’ if fisting is dangerous? Not before, but after you’ve had a fist in your cunt? Well, so much for being proactive. I’d be willing to guess that you probably already have some data on the advisability of this form of extreme sex play. You clearly have enough information to declare that you LOVE IT.

hanball2.jpgOk, for everyone in my audience who hasn’t heard of fisting (both those with a cunt and those who are cunt-less), let’s start at the beginning. I trust you know what fingering is, right? Whether it’s fingerin’ a pussy or an asshole, it’s loads of fun to diddle someone’s innards. We already know that fingerin’ a dude’s hole will stimulate his prostate, which even non-gay men are finding to be way fun. And fingering a pussy will stimulate a woman’s G-spot. Ok sex fans; take that fingerin’ concept and multiply that by 5. That’s right, fisting is inserting a whole hand/fist into cunt or asshole.

For all you folks who haven’t fainted away, yes, it is anatomically possible, and yes, it CAN be EXTREMELY pleasurable. I hasten to add that gettin’ a whole fist inside a pussy is somewhat easier than gettin’ a fist in an asshole. But for folks like you, Dena, those who are into massive penetration, nothing is a bigger turn-on. Fisting aficionados say that handballing is the most intimate and complete way to touch another human being. This kind of extreme penetration has to be worked up to slowly and gently.

To your question if this practice is harmful…well not if ya do it right. First off, the fisting top does NOT make a fist and ram it home. Trust and communication between partners is as essential as is tons of lube. Some folks swear by Crisco, others the legendary J-Lube — a handy-dandy concentrate for veterinarian use. They believe this product stand apart from the rest because it’s more slippery and gooey. You can find J-Lube in Dr Dick’s Stockroom. See the My Stockroom tab right there at the top of this page. How freakin’ convenient is that?

The fisting top must, of course, respect his/her partner’s limits and pain threshold. Safe fisting is happy fisting. And to that end, keep the following concerns in mind.handball1.jpg

First of all, the fisting top must cut and file all his/her nails until every finger is as smooth as it could possibly be. Your fingers will be in some very delicate places — places that may not have pain receptors. You’ll want to insure that you minimize all chance of causing injury.

Make sure your partner is relaxed, comfortable and turned on. When a woman is aroused, her pussy lubricates, relaxes, expands and lengthens; all of which are very important for accommodating a fist, don’t ‘cha know.

Even the wettest cunt in the world will need lots and lots of lube during fisting. There’s no such thing as too much lube, so prepare for a big fat mess. Lube your hand, the back of your hand, between your fingers. Keep applying lube as you go. Push the lube into the pussy (or asshole) with your fingers. Remember if you’re using latex gloves, oil-based lubes will dissolve latex.

Start with one or two fingers and work your way up to three and then four. Most people need some time to further relax their muscles, and some may require several stretching sessions, over weeks or even months, before they can actually accommodate a whole hand.

Tops, be sensitive to your bottom’s feelings. You are trying to finesse part of her body to open and to admit part of your body deeply inside her. If you take your time, the energy exchange between you and she will move you both into an altered state. Communication and relaxation is key.

handball_self.jpgOnce you’ve reached a five-finger insertion, you’re almost there. But it’s at this precise point that the handballing top needs to be the most attentive. Your partner’s pussy is being stretched to its near limit. Your partner is going to be riding a wave of pain/pleasure. If you find her cunt has reached its limit for the time being, respect that and pull out slowly. But if your partner wants more, then slip your knuckles inside. Be sure to fold your thumb under your fingers, so that your hand will form a duckbill wedge shape. This will allow you to gradually stretch your partner open as you press on. Apply steady but slow pressure.

Your partner should tell you when to push and when to back off. Careless fisting can cause muscle and tissue injuries. If the top goes too fast or too hard there’s gonna be more than discomfort, there will sure enough be injury. Listen to the owner of the pussy; she will let you know the difference between hurts so good and hurts really bad.

Your knuckles are the widest part of the hand and the most difficult part to get past the opening of the cunt. If there’s gonna be resistance to the insertion of the fist, it’ll probably be at this point. Wait until your partner is ready before making the big push. She may be able to help by bearing down (like if she were birthin’ a baby, or taking a big dump). Once your knuckles slip past the ring of muscles around the vaginal entrance, the pressure will ease off. Now you can gently roll your duckbill shaped hand into a fist.

At this point, the owner of the pussy or asshole may want a gentle pumping movement with your hand. Fisting can produce extremely intense sensations; so ask her what feels good to her.

When the session is done, make your hand into the duckbill wedge shape once again, and gently slide it out slowly.

Good luck ya’ll

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The Cone

REVIEW #2

Guess what, sex fans? I am the proud owner of my very own “The Cone” (C030) $129.00. And oh jeez, my life is never gonna be the same.

I am now the envy of all my friends — both the male and female variety — since the hot pink pyramid shaped package arrived on my doorstep. (Actually the hot pink pyramid shaped package arrived encased in a nondescript brown cardboard box, but you get the idea, right?)c030.jpg

I purposely left the pastel pink cone shaped object sitting nonchalantly on my desk for the past 10 days. Without fail it caught the eye of everyone who passed through Dr Dick’s office/salon/café/crash pad. “What the hell is that?” You’re kidding!” Really? “Get outta here!” “Oh My God, can I try it?” And so it went day after day.

I fond myself repeating the mantra — “It’s an innovative sex toy! – It’s pop art! – It’s my new BFF! — It’s three things in one!”

My hat is off to the developers of this unique unisex toy. You can tell right away that the folks who created this little wonder have a profound appreciation for sexual pleasure, as well as a joyful sense of playful fun. This kind of synergy can and apparently does turn the sex toy industry on its head. Bravo!

Ok, so what exactly is The Cone? Primarily, it is a hands-free battery-operated vibrator, don’t cha know. And that, sex fans, allows you to be pretty gal-darn creative in how you use the bugger. In fact, its unique design practically begs you to come up with clever new use or two every time you use it. I know of what I speak! I came up with one really good one. But I’m getting a little ahead of myself.

It has a sixteen-function 3000-rpm gold brush motor. It is both powerful and quiet. (Believe me, once you have at this thing, you will be making all the noise, not it.) It has a soft high-quality pink silicone skin. Its about seven inches in diameter at the base, five inches high, and weighs just over a pound. It has two push button controls. Simply put, there is nothing discreet about it, folks! Everything about it screams: “I’m here. I’m pink. Get used to it!

The Cone requires 3 “C” batteries. Unfortunately, the first set of batteries is not included in the package. I tell you this because I don’t want you to get all bummed out when you whip it out, for the first time, hoping to hop on for a ride only to discover you don’t have the proper batteries on hand.

Even though this isn’t an insertable device (That is, unless your hole looks like the Arc de Triomphe in Paris.), you’ll want to use a good personal lube to keep The Cone’s silicone skin from chafing your naughty parts. Just make sure you use a non-silicone lube though, or you’ll ruin the blasted thing.

Like I said, The Cone has sixteen different vibrating programs — from mild to “Whoa Nelly! I suggest you take your time and cycle through the different vibe patterns to find the ones you like best. Here’s a tip: the on/off switch doubles as an ‘Instant Orgasm’ button, which revs the thing up to fever pitch in an instant. This is apparently for all those folks out there who are just too damned busy to cum like a normal person.

For the uninitiated, the pointy cone shape may be intimidating. But relax there’s no need to worry; The Cone’s peak is soft and spongy. It’s sorta the consistency of a very stiff dick. You can sit on this baby, lean on it, lie on it or plop it in your lap. You can use it alone, or with a partner. Just don’t be surprised if your partner tries to monopolize The Cone. If you have girl parts, The Cone is ideal for your pussy, clit and taint (perineum). If you have boy parts, The Cone is perfect for your cock, balls and taint. And everyone’s asshole will sing for joy when The Cone comes knockin’ at the back door.

The Cone’s silicone skin is nonporous, which means bacteria cannot penetrate it. That makes it a breeze to clean. Just wipe it down with a mild soap and warm water after each use. To sterilize — remove the silicone skin from the unit and swish it in boiling water for a couple of minutes. Of course when you replace the skin, ya gotta realign it on the unit properly or you will not be able to find the operating buttons. But whatever you do, don’t immerse The Cone itself in water.

Full review HERE