Search Results: Anal Ease

You are browsing the search results for anal ease

Boys Will Be Boys

Name: James
Gender: Male
Age: 19
Location:
I want to know if I should have sex with a man for the first time.

Well gee, darlin’, I suppose that would all depend on if you are into man-sex or not. If you are, I suppose having your first encounter will be like falling off a log. However, if you’re not into gay sex, then why would you even be considering such a thing.boys kissing

For the sake of argument, let’s just say you are into some hot man-on-man action, or think you are. If that’s the case, I have some questions. Do you have a particular partner in mind? If you do, what is it about this guy that makes you want to get physical with him? If you’re honest with yourself about this, you will probably be able to determine what kind of sexual contact you want to have with the dude. Which brings me to my next set of questions.

What kind of gay sex are you looking to experiment with? Something light, like kissing, making out, mutual masturbation, shared hand-jobs? For more information on this, check out my swell tutorial about hand jobs titled: The Art Of The Humble Hand Job.

Perhaps you’re looking to be a bit more adventurous, like cock sucking. That’s great too. But wait! Would you know how to smoke some pole with grace and ease? If not, check out my tutorial: So Ya Wanna Be A World-Class Cocksucker …Or How To Give The Perfect Blow Job. To find this brilliant expose and lots more information about the humble hummer, go to the CATEGORY pull down menu in the sidebar and look for “ORAL.” Then look for Cock Sucking.

Maybe you’re considering butt fucking. That’s a bit advanced for the gay sex novice, but it’s not unheard of. If I were you, I’d return to the CATEGORY pull down menu in the sidebar and check out the heading “ANAL”. There you will be treated to loads of information about being a good top, like my tutorial, Finessing That Ass Fuck — A Tutorial For a Top. As well as my tutorial for being a good bottom, Liberating The B.O.B Within.

There’s only one thing you absolutely need to know when it comes to ass fuckin, regardless of what position floats your boat. Be sure that whoever is on top uses a condom. And if you don’t know why you need to do that, then darlin’, you’re just not ready for sex with any kind of partner…same sex or otherwise.

Good luck

Name: Tony
Gender: Male
Age: 24
Location:
I’m trying to find out how to get ink marks off my dick without hurting my dickhead.

Whoops! Looks like you need to reevaluate the company you keep when you drink to the point of passing out, my friend.

I realize writin’ shit on a guy’s johnson while he’s unconscious is a hilarious practical joke among the frat-boy crowd. I mean, what could be funnier, right? Of course being on the receiving end of this little prank, like our friend Tony here, is considerably less comical.

i enjoy penisRidding oneself of ink marks, particularly the indelible variety, from one’s privates is a pain — both literally and figuratively. The best one can say about this clean-up chore is that it will probably cure the guy of binge drinking, at least with a bunch of rowdy adolescent-minded companions with Sharpie markers and too much time on their hands.

OK, Tony, here’s what you do. First, apply a liberal coat of baby oil or mineral oil to the effected area. Take your time massaging the oil into your skin. You may discover that this oily massage gives you a woody. That may be the silver lining to your ink-stained cloud. Actually having an erection will help expand the skin of your dickhead and allow the mineral oil to better penetrate the skin. The oil will sink into your skin and help lift the ink stain to the surface.

Follow this part of the treatment with lots of warm soap and water. You should see ink stain lessening.

Next, massage in a liberal mount of rubbing alcohol. Follow this with more warm soap and water.

Continue alternating between mineral oil followed by soap and water and rubbing alcohol followed by soap and water. Always ending the treatment with the soap and water part. A couple applications like this should do the trick. I would, however, recommend that you be as gentle as possible. If the satin persists after two such applications, give your prick a day to rest before attacking the stain again.

Good luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Nectar of the Gods

Ya’ll know that we’re taking a short break from podcasting, right? Good! This should keep you entertained till we return.

Name: steve
Gender: Male
Age: 32
Location: usa
hey there just wondered if there was a way to produce more pre-cum as my girlfriend really likes it.

Ya gotta love a chick that groves on some sweet precum, don’t cha know! Not everyone loves this nectar of the gods as much as some of us do. The curious thing about this stuff is that some guys have a load of it every time; others have little to none.

Precum, or pre-ejaculate as it is technically known is the product of the bulbourethral gland (or Cowper’s gland). This is part of our reproductive system, obviously. It is about the size of a pea and it sits just under the prostate gland behind a portion of the urethra at the base of our cock. And ya know what? Women have a similar, or holologous, gland called the Bartholin gland. Theirs is located in the inner lips of a their pussy and it provides lubrication during sex.

These glands (both the female and male type) get smaller, and thus less productive, as we age. That’s why the delicious treats, precum and pussy juice, are so hard to cum by (no pun intended) in us older folks.

Basically, these clear liquids are associated with the arousal stage of our sexual response cycle. In us guys, precum lubricates and helps clean out any urine or other foreign matter from our urethra that might impede, or worse, kill our very delicate sperm.

How does one increase precum production, if that’s even possible? Good question! One sure factor is to keep yourself well hydrated, which just makes sense, right? The more hydrated you are, the more liquids you’ll produce. Another factor may be to massage your cowper’s gland. The more you stimulate the gland, the more productive it’s likely to be.

How does one stimulate his Cowper’s gland, you might ask. Well then, I have the answer to that question too. Since our Cowper’s gland is just below our prostate, you stimulate your Cowper’s gland with a nice prostate massager. And guess what? We’ve reviewed a bunch of them on DrDickSexToyReviews.com. Check it out! Mozie on over to my site and look for the CATEGORY pull-down menu in the sidebar. Scroll down till you find the category — Prostate Massage. There are several pages of products and reviews. So knock yourself out.

Allow me to introduce you to a fine line of prostate massagers from the good people at Aneros.

If you’re a guy (or you know someone who is) and you have a butt hole (or the guy you know has one), I’ve got some swell news for YOU! I want to introduce you to three hands-free prostate and perineum massagers that have cum my way. I haven’t been this excited (literally and figuratively) about a line of adult products in a very long time.

Finally, someone got it right! The first thing I want to say about these Aneros products is they areb750.jpg designed and developed by folks who are as serious about prostate health as they are about prostate pleasure. Listen, I’m all in favor of toys that have no other purpose than to dispense a good dose of the jollies. But if a fella can pleasure himself AND do himself some good health-wise…all at the same time; well that just about beats the pants off diddlin’ just for fun.

Before we get down to actually landin’ these babies where the sun don’t shine; I have some general comments to make. Each Aneros product has a unique shape. And there’s a shape for every anal-pleasure experience level — from rank amateur to professional butt pirate.

They’re made of firm, durable, non-toxic plastic. They clean up in a jiffy. Warm water and a mild detergent do just fine. You can also sterilize them by dropping ‘em in boiling water for a couple of minutes. Hell, ya can even pop ‘em in the dishwasher too. What could be easier?

They have an ergonomic elegance about them. They actually remind me of a finely crafted medical device. No surprise there, I suppose; since each Aneros massager is the product of years of research and development. And just so you don’t think I’m pullin’ your leg — these are the only medically patented prostate massagers on the market.

Their Zen-like simplicity is a marvel in and of itself. There are no batteries to wear down, no wires to fumble with. These beauties works their magic in harmony with your body’s own movements. Just lifting or repositioning your leg, tensing your PC muscle, or rolling on your side will stimulate and invigorate your prostate and perineum in a slightly different way. It’s truly amazing. I discovered that if I did a few crunches while my Aneros massager was lodged within; what was previously a workout drudgery became a tingly delight.

Since I had three Aneros products to review, I decided to share the wealth, so to speak. I wanted to find three uninhibited men who were up for an afternoon of prostate pleasuring. I apparently know the right kind of guys, because the very first three fellas I invited jumped at the opportunity. And best of all, we covered the spectrum of anal play experience.

I told my visitors that we had one simple task — to agree or disagree with the Aneros claim that their stimulators increase one’s sexual performance and stamina, facilitate a stronger erection and enhance orgasmic pleasure. Before we set to work, however, I had to remind my friends that we gathered together and dropped our drawers purely in the name of science. So I insisted that they wipe those stupid grins off their faces right away! ;-)

Kevin — single, straight, 25 — was the youngest and least experienced among us. (He’s never had more than a finger in his ass.) He chose the Aneros MGX as his challenge. Despite it’s modest girth, he was still a bit apprehensive.

Glenn — partnered, gay, 33 — was the most experienced among us. He’s pretty smug about his talented ass and proudly identifies himself as a power-bottom extraordinaire. Initially he scoffed at all three stimulators. “Shit, I could take all three of them at once!” He proclaimed. I handed him the Aneros Progasm, the largest stimulator of the bunch, and told him to park his famous ass and shut his pie hole for the time being.

Carlos — married, “mostly straight,” 46 — has experimented with a couple of anal toys and would like to do more. He wants to get his wife involved too. However, he’s been having some prostate problems lately, so he was unsure how helpful he’d be. He got the Aneros Helix.

We shared our initial reactions to each product — how they looked and felt in our hand. We talked about what our expectations were, if any. We took note of the different shapes and the configuration of the Perineum Tab and K-Tab on each.

  • I gotta tell ya, we all were stumped by the K-Tab reference. I actually had to go to the Aneros website for an explanation. “Kundalini or “K-Tab” is supposed to add sensations up and down your spine similar to the sensations you’re feeling through your prostate.” Ok, the “Kundalini” reference is way too esoteric for me. I realize this is some kind of tantric reference, but please! Basically the K-Tab hits below your tailbone or coccyx. Sheesh!

c771.jpgNow that my guests and I are all comfortable and naked; the fun begins in earnest. Kevin realizes that he’s gonna need lube to insert his MGX. (Actually everyone needs lube for ass play of any kind. But ya’ll know that already, huh?) Unfortunately, Kevin was using a dainty amount of lube right on his pucker. I guess he thought that was gonna do the trick. He was oh so wrong! Listen up; ya gotta lube the whole chute, don’t cha’ know.

Glenn leaned over with one of the Marksman water-based lube shooters that came with the Aneros stimulators. He showed Kevin how to pop the top, insert the shooter stem to deep-lube his hole. “Ahhh, much better!” Kevin proclaimed. On his side with his lower leg straight and his upper leg cocked to his stomach, he tired to insert the MGX. But failed. I think he was pretty nervous and there was a fair amount of performance anxiety goin’ on too. It didn’t help that, we his audience, were looking on with great anticipation.

Carlos reached over and held Kevin’s upper leg, so he wouldn’t have to tense to hold the position. Then he said; “relax and breathe deep.” Kevin’s next try was successful. As soon as the MGX slipped into place, with its head knockin’ on his prostate, Kevin’s eyes rolled back in his head and he let out a whimper. “Damn! Holy Shit!”

Kevin was a little nervous about lowering his leg, because that movement slightly altered the position of the MGX. Each time he moved, he got a jolt of pleasure. Finally, he was able to roll on to his back and lowered his leg. I told him to do some Kegel exercises. “Tighten your P.C. muscle (like you would if your were trying to stop the flow of pee) and hold that contraction for a slow count of 3. Then relax. Next, contract and relax your P.C. muscle as rapidly as you can — like a flutter.”

Kevin was oozing precum like there was no tomorrow. He had a rock-hard hardon. Ok, so he’s 25, all his boners are rock-hard. He did say, however, that he was afraid to touch his cock, because he thought he’d shoot his load for sure if he did. And he didn’t want to cum right away. He wanted to ride all these new sensations he was having.

Carlos was next. He popped the top and administered his Marksman lube shooter like a pro. His previous experience with ass toys insured an effortless insertion. Maybe because of his enlarged prostate, the Helix hit home with a bang…as it were, and it took his breath away.

Carlos admitted that the experience was right on the edge of being uncomfortable at first. I reminded him that the good people at Aneros suggest that everyone take his time to acquaint his butt with one of their stimulators. “Ya gotta be patient, darlin’!” I insisted. “Your body needs a chance to get familiar with its new friend.”

Carlos worked through the initial discomfort with deep breathing, Kegels and yankin’ on his balls to move the sexual energy around. He too had a powerful hardon and more than the usual amount of precum. This surprised him. Because of his enlarged prostate, Carlos found that he needed to take a break and remove the Helix every once in a while. This was fine with him, because reinserting it was so much fun.

While Carlos and Kevin were riding their stimulators, Glenn was preparing himself for disappointment. He was sure his Progasm was gonna be a bust. He put on a cockring, because he assumed he would need one. No “little” insertable was gonna challenge his pro-hole or give him wood either…or so he thought.

Glenn’s poop chute devoured the Progasm like it was a snack. It slipped into place with an audible pop. We all giggled like schoolgirls. Sure enough, the girth of the Progasm was like playing house for him. What Glenn didn’t count on was the P-Tab and the K-Tab. These little numbers made all the difference in the world. None of his other ass toys had anything like this.

When Glenn could finally admit that bigger isn’t always better, he realized the potential of the Progasm. As every power- bottom will tell you — the secret to enjoying a big toy and/or a ferocious fuck is pelvic muscle control. If you keep your muscles (including your PC muscle) in tip-top shape, a wealth of pleasure awaits you. If you go loose in the caboose…so to speak, you pay the price in pleasure and sphincter control.

While the Progasm didn’t come close to “filling him up,” it did hit the spot. The P-Tab and the K-Tab riveted the Progasm head to his prostate while adding the additional stimulation of his “taint” (perineum) and spine. This was all new territory for Glenn. He found that he had to work at tightening his PC muscle around the more modestly sized Progasm shank. This exercised his muscles more; delivering more pleasure.

Glenn had to remove his cockring because his wood was gettin’ too intense. “Ok, I’m a believer. This thing is pretty fuckin’ amazing! I’m sold, big time!”

Our afternoon session ended in an explosive manner. After only 20 minutes with his MGX, Kevin couldn’t stand it any longer and popped a wad that hurled well over his shoulder. We all cheered him on as he writhed in delicious agony. (Funny how pleasure and pain register as the same on one’s face.) He pulled the plug from his ass and fought to catch his breath. As his dick softened it continued to dribble spooge into a pool near his navel. “This thing rocks!”

Carlos decided to finish himself off without the Helix in place. He said he liked the butt play a lot; it just became too intense as he neared orgasm. He finally gave up his spunk in three waves of bliss. He was surprised at the amount of cum he produced. He figured it was the prostate massage that milked more cum out of him. However, he reported that his prostate was very tender after the orgasm. He though he needed to take more time with the Helix or maybe try the MGX next time.

Meanwhile, Glenn was edging — playing with his sexual tension as he jerked off. He would come right up to the point of ejaculating, and then he’d suddenly let go of his dick. Its hardness would slap against his belly. When the urge to cum subsided he’d start to handle himself again. He said he could usually delay his ejaculation for an hour doing this. Not today, though. The Progasm altered his edging performance and brought him closer to cuming more frequently, until he finally let fly. He said edging usually makes for a more intense orgasm, but this time, with the Progasm pluggin his happy hole, he felt several mini orgasmic quakes before the big one hit. “Like I said, I’m sold!”

As my guests lay spent on the floor, I asked them to rate their particular Aneros product, on a scale of 1-10 — 10 being the highest. Kevin gave his MGX a 10.0. He was gonna go online and buy his own just as soon as he got home. Glenn was happy to be proven wrong. He gave the Progasm a 8.5. He thought he’d probably buy his own, as well. He asked if he could borrow the MGX for his partner, who never bottoms, to try. Carlos rated the Helix at 9.0, but his experience at 8.0. Like he said, I need more time to work with one of these things on my sensitive prostate. He wanted to introduce his wife to the concept and asked if he could borrow the Helix for some homework.

As for me, I tried all three stimulators, I found the Helix fit me best. I sympathized with Carlos and the trouble he has with his enlarged prostate. I know the feeling. Lots of men our age and older are similarly troubled. However, I am discovering that a regular routine of Aneros prostate massage therapy is making a big difference. It’s assisting me in achieving better pelvic muscle tone and increasing oxygen-rich blood flow. This is reducing the size of my prostate and making my erections firmer. Firmer erections mean more sensitivity. And greater sensitivity means more pleasure. It’s a win-win situation all around.

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a fierce advocate for prostate self-awareness. At the risk of generalizing from my experience, I’d say there’s a very good chance that regular use of an Aneros stimulator will facilitate prostate health and vitality in most men. And a healthy prostate, increased blood flow and added muscle control are the kingpins of powerful orgasms, rejuvenated sexual ability, and stamina, as well as a stiffer cock. So, like I said; “if a fella can pleasure himself AND do himself some good health-wise…all at the same time; well that just about beat the pants off just diddlin’ just for fun.”

ENJOY!

Plug Your Hole In Three Easy Steps

Plug Your Hole In Three Easy Steps — The Butt Plug Tutorial

I want to welcome you to the Wonderful World of Butt Plugs! Not sure what a butt plug is or why you would want one? Or maybe you sure enough know a butt plug when you see one, but you just don’t know how to go about choosing the right one for you. Well, never fear, because Dr Dick is here with another one of his Handy Dandy Sex Toy Advisories.i'm wearing my butt plug

A butt plug is an anal stimulation device that allows you to enjoy sustained anal pleasure (and prostate stimulation for the men folk) without the worry of having your toy fall out, or worse, disappear up you hole.

Let’s look at a typical butt plug to get a feel for how it works. Unlike most dildos and other anal toys, a butt plug is shorter and has a unique shape. The insertable part is often a tapered cone shape, designed for easy insertion and that filled-up feeling while it’s in place.

The plug tapers more dramatically near the base into a notch. This allows your sphincter muscle to close down on the plug keeping it firmly in place. Finally the wide base keeps it from slipping inside your bum.

Pretty gal-darn clever, huh?

But why would I want a plug in my butt? You might ask. That, my friend, is a question only a novice butt pirate would ask. Unfamiliar with the joys of butt play, are ya? Well, here’s the 411 on anal pleasuring. Your bum is chock full of nerve ending that, when stimulated, induce intense pleasure. And a butt plug can be worn for hours at a time for a sustained dose of devilish delight.

Once you decide to give a plug a try, you’ll have loads of options to choose from. There is a slue of different sizes, shapes colors and textures. They come in several different materials. And some even vibrate. How fun is that?

Let’s look at all these options in turn.

Start with SIZE.
If you’re new to the whole anal thing, I recommend you try something small. You’ll want an insertable length of less then 4” and a diameter of 2.5”. Feeling a bit more daring? Want to increase the insertable length and/or diameter? Knock yourself out, my friend. There are dozens of sizes available.

Next choose a Material.
Got the dimensions you want, but not sure about what kind of material you want plugging your hole? I know that sounds funny, but it may actually matter what you insert where the sun don’t shine! Say, Dr Dick, how do I know what material is best for me? Excellent question! See, you’re becoming a well-informed consumer already. Let me detail some of the finer points for you.

  • Latex

Is the granddaddy of sex toy materials.
PLUSES —
Inexpensive
Soft and flexible
Use with both water-based and silicone-based lubes.
MINUSES —
Porous, thus less hygienic
Difficult to clean
Distinct rubbery odor

  • Jelly

Advancements in chemistry transformed ordinary latex into an even softer and more pliable jelly material.
PLUSES —
Inexpensive
Super-soft and flexible
Appealing translucent jelly-like appearance
Use with both water-based and silicone-based lubes.
Comes in a variety of colors
MINUSES —
Porous, thus less hygienic
Difficult to clean
Distinct chemical odor

  • SiliconeC935

A non-latex product that come in two varieties — firm and soft.
PLUSES —
Durable and long lasting
Easy to maintain
Hypoallergenic
Waterproof
You can sterilize silicone toys by boiling them
They’re bleachable
Dishwasher safe
More realistic feel
Retains body heat
Comes in a variety of colors
No odor
MINUSES —
Slightly more expensive
Use only water-based lubes

  • Stainless Steelaluminum butt plug

It is smooth, hard and a thing of beauty.
PLUSES —
Super-durable and long lasting
Nonporous
Easy to maintain
Hypoallergenic
Waterproof
You can sterilize Stainless Steel toys by boiling them
Bleachable
Dishwasher safe
Much heftier weight
No unpleasant odor
Can be warmed or chilled
Use with both water-based and silicone-based lubes.
MINUSES —
More expensive
Hard and inflexible

  • Pyrex Glassglass

Pyrex is a hard dense glass that will not shatter or splinter. It’s smooth, hard and a work of art.
PLUSES —
Super-durable, long lasting
Nonporous
Easy to maintain
Hypoallergenic
Waterproof
You can sterilize Pyrex toys by boiling them
Bleachable
Dishwasher safe
Hefty weight
No unpleasant odor
Can be warmed or chilled
Use with both water-based and silicone-based lubes.
MINUSES —
More expensive
Hard and inflexible

  • Wood wood

It’s smooth, hard and a work of art.
PLUSES —
Super-durable, long lasting
Nonporous
Easy to maintain
Hypoallergenic
Waterproof
No unpleasant odor
Use with both water-based and silicone-based lubes.
MINUSES —
More expensive
Hard and inflexible

  • New Supersoft

Is a new material that’s has the closest feel to real-life skin. It can be both soft and rigid.
PLUSES—
Less expensive
Great texture
MINUSES —
Very porous
Less hygienic
Always use with a condom
Use only water-based lubes.
Difficult to clean
Distinct chemical odorD649

  • Rubber

An old standard!
PLUSES—
Inexpensive
Durable, long lasting
Waterproof
Use with both water-based and silicone-based lubes.
Comes in a vast array of colors (just as long as it’s black)
MINUSES —
Very porous, less hygienic
Difficult to clean
Distinct rubbery odor

Next choose Special Features.
Once you’ve decided on the material you want, you to customize your butt plug with special features like:beautiful
Bendable
Inflatable
Multi speed vibrating
Suction cup

Next choose Texture.
Latex, silicone, glass, wood and rubber butt plugs come in an array of textures. Which one of these buggers will tickles your fancy?
Bulged
Noduled
Nubbed
Ribbed
Smooth
Studded
Swirled
Veined
Velvety

Butt plugs come in loads of delectable colors and even more shades and hues. Looking for something rosy red, or jet black? Something to match your eyes, or your Day-Glo lime undies? You’ll not have any difficulty finding your heart’s desire.

ENJOY!

The Naughty & The Nice

Just in time for the holidays, here’s my Naughty and Nice list.

NICE

NAUGHTY

NICELY NAUGHTY

Happy Holidays!

Looking for Mr Right

Name: Eric
Gender: Male
Age: 25
Location: New Jersey
I’m 25, openly gay, and have never been in a relationship. I consider myself intellectual & attractive, with a great sense of humor–many people that I meet are amazed that I’m not taken. I tend to be hyper-analytic and super-honest, neither of which has gotten me very far in my dating life. I’m very self-aware and work hard at self-improvement and reinvention. I just can’t seem to find quality men! I don’t care for the gay scene, and I hate the depersonalizing nature of many gay online dating sites. All too often, I feel frustrated with being single, and I end up having a random hookup just to be close to a guy. Do you have any advice? I seem to be stuck in cycle of dating, disappointment, and reinvention. What can I do to meet Mr. Right?

I do have some advice, pup. I hope you will take it to heart. My first suggestion is that you jettison the whole Mr. Right concept. My experience tells me that most folks who are stymied in their search for a partner have too precise a mental picture of his/her ideal mate. This “knight in shinning armor” concept rarely translates very well into the real world. No one is perfect; all humans have flaws that those who love them learn to overlook. Some people, both women and men, gay and straight, have such a specific script of the person they are looking to nest with that they dismiss out of hand loads of plausible potential prospects, which is a huge mistake.

For example, I had a client in San Francisco, a straight guy. He wasn’t particularly handsome, in fact he was kinda dumpy, but he was a genuinely sweet man with lots to offer a mate. He desperately wanted to find the woman of his dreams. Unfortunately, he scripted himself right out of the market. His ideal mate had to be a redhead…a real redhead, if you know what I mean. He also insisted that the woman have a big set of knockers. I take it that he developed this script after years and years of consuming big titty porn. But wherever it came from it was his undoing.

At any rate, my client would dismiss out of hand, any woman who didn’t fit this very specific profile. And his dating life was a disaster. I had to help him understand that he narrowed the pool of potential candidates till it virtually evaporated. I asked him, “How many natural redheads do you suppose there are out there in the Bay Area? Of these, how many are single? Of these, how many have a monster rack on ‘em? Of these, how many would fall for a guy like you?” It was bitter medicine, but it was the dose of reality he desperately needed.

You, Eric, may be suffering from a similar condition. I can’t really say for sure from what you write. What I can say with some confidence is that you’re not particularly accommodating when it comes to the foibles of others. Look how you describe yourself — “hyper-analytic and super-honest”. Is that just a easy way of saying you are really overly critical and downright bitchy? Maybe, just maybe that’s how others perceive you. And that ain’t gonna land you a man no how!

You say you can’t find quality men. Again, that’s more of a comment about you than the number of quality men out there. Maybe all the quality men find you way too prickly to get close to. Your frustration may even make you edgier. And sometimes frustration morphs into desperation and there’s nothing more unattractive than that. You may be inadvertently hanging a big sign around your neck that reads: “Steer Clear, Trouble Ahead!”

Relationships are curious things. They almost never happen to someone who is desperate for one. Or if the desperate person actually finds a relationship, inevitably it’ll be a disaster. And here’s a tip: casual hook ups for sex are fine and dandy for what they are. They relieve sexual tension and not a great deal more. I advise you not to expect them to magically transform into a long-term relationship. That only happens in fairytales.

OK then, what might you do? I suggest that you simply cease the pursuit of a mate and let him find you. That’s right, just let it go. Instead of investing all that energy in pursuing that illusive relationship, focus your attention on bettering yourself and the world around you. You apparently already know how to do this since you say you work hard at self-improvement and reinvention. Wonderful! But how do you go about this self-improvement and reinvention? Is yours a solitary endeavor, or might you join others while making this happen? Do you take classes? Enjoy the arts? Do you read? Cook? Are you an outdoorsy kinda lad? Are you of service to others? Do you volunteer? Do you like pets, gardening or crafts? Are you political? Are you athletic? Do you travel?

If you do any of these things you will automatically find yourself surrounded by like-minded humans of every stripe. Listen darlin’, just because you’re queer that doesn’t mean you are restricted to the gay scene. There’s no need for a ghetto mentality in this day and age. Instead of slumming on those tiresome gay online dating sites. Look elsewhere for your fulfillment. You are more likely to encounter people who share your values if you spend your time on online at sites that reflect your interests and there’s a zillion of them. Look for websites and forums that feature your interests and concerns. And unless it’s the American Nazi Party or the KKK, you’ll no doubt find other homos who will broaden your social network. And the larger your social network, the more likely you will encounter a soul mate.

Finally, if you don’t find precisely what you are looking for online, then it’s up to you to make it happen on your own. I suggest that turn to a site like craigslist and post there. Start a club, or a discussion group. Initiate a gathering of like-minded people for an outing or an endeavor. Whatever you do direct your energies outward. Stop with the navel gazing already. You are in the prime of your life, and the world is your oyster. But first you’re gonna have to get of your pity pot.

Good luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

SEO Powered by Platinum SEO from Techblissonline
Get Adobe Flash player