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Wonderful World of Butt Plugs!

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Cassandra
I’m really curious how you actually overcome the fascination of wanting anal sex? What do you do and what does it take?

Ahhh, your pullin my leg, right? Cassandra, darling, I don’t get it. You have a fascination with wanting some hot backdoor action; is that correct? Am I supposed to gather from this rather round about way of putting things that you have yet to explore ass fucking? That’s what it sounds like to me.

i'm wearing my butt plugIf I’m correct in this assumption, the sure-fire way of overcoming this or any fascination of wanting this or anything else is to indulge yourself the very thing you’ve been wanting. This is not rocket science.

Once you have a taste of what you’ve desired, you’ll no longer need to overcome a fascination. If by chance, you’re actually wondering if you want to enjoy your butthole or not and you want to discover this on your own without the pressure of having a partner present; then I suggest you do a little experimentation on your own.

Allow me to introduce you to the Wonderful World of Butt Plugs! Not sure what a butt plug is or why you would want one? Or maybe you sure enough know a butt plug from a hole in your head, but you just don’t know how to go about choosing the right one for you. Well, never fear, because Dr Dick is here with another one of his Handy Dandy Sex Toy Advisories: Plug Your Hole In Three Easy Steps. And you can thank all my inquisitive correspondents and the treasure trove that is Dr Dick’s Stockroom for the heads up on these puppies.

A butt plug is an anal stimulation device that allows you to enjoy sustained anal pleasure (and prostate stimulation for the men folk) without the worry of having your toy fall out, or worse, disappear up your chute.

Let’s look at a typical butt plug to get a feel for how it works. Unlike most dildos and other anal toys, a butt plug is shorter and has a unique shape. The insertable part is often a tapered cone shape, designed for easy insertion and that all-filled-up feeling while it’s in place.

The plug tapers more dramatically near the base into a notch. This allows your sphincter muscle to close down on the plug keeping it firmly in place. Finally the wide base keeps it from slipping inside your bum.

Pretty gal-darn clever, huh?

But why would I want a plug in my ass? You might query. That, my friend, is a question only a rank amateur would ask. Unfamiliar with the joys of butt play, are ya? Well, here’s the 411 on anal pleasuring. Your bum is chock full of nerve ending that, when stimulated, induce intense pleasure. And a butt plug can be worn for hours at a time for a sustained dose of devilish delight.

Once you decide to give a plug a try, you’ll have loads of options to choose from. There is a slue of different sizes, shapes colors and textures. They come in several different materials. And some even vibrate. How fun is that?

Let’s look at all these options in turn.

— Start with SIZE.
If you’re new to the whole anal thing, I recommend you try something small. You’ll want an insertable length of less then 4” and a diameter of 2.5”. Feeling a bit more daring? Want to increase the insertable length and/or diameter? Knock yourself out, my friend. There are dozens of sizes available.

— Next choose a Material.
Got the dimensions you want, but not sure about what kind of material you want plugging your hole? I know that may sound funny, but it actually does matter what you insert where the sun don’t shine!

Say, Dr Dick, how do I know what material is best for me? Excellent question! See, you’re becoming a well-informed consumer already. Let me detail some of the finer points for you.

Latex — the granddaddy of sex toy material.
PLUSSES —
Inexpensive
Soft and flexible
Use with both water-based and oil-based lubes.

MINUSES —
Porous, thus less hygienic
Difficult to clean
May contain phthalates
Distinct rubbery odor

Jelly —advancements in chemistry transformed ordinary latex into even softer and more pliable jellies.
PLUSSES —
Inexpensive
Super-soft and flexible
Appealing translucent jelly-like appearance
Use with both water-based and oil-based lubes.
Comes in a variety of colors

MINUSES —
Porous, thus less hygienic
Difficult to clean
Probably contain phthalates
Distinct rubbery odor

Silicone — a non-latex product that come in two varieties — firm and soft.
PLUSSES —
Durable and long lasting
Easy to maintain
Hypoallergenic
Waterproof
You can sterilize silicone toys by boiling themc552.jpg
They’re bleachable
Dishwasher safe
More realistic feel
Retains body heat
Comes in a variety of colors
Less of an odor

MINUSES —
More expensive
Use only water-based lubes

Stainless Steel —it is smooth, hard and a thing of beauty.c991.jpg
PLUSSES —
Super-durable and long lasting
Nonporous
Easy to maintain
Hypoallergenic
Waterproof
You can sterilize Stainless Steel toys by boiling them
Bleachable
Dishwasher safe
Much heftier weight
No unpleasant odor
Can be warmed or chilled
Use with both water-based and oil-based lubes.

MINUSES —
More expensive
Hard and inflexible

Pyrex Glass — a hard dense glass that will not shatter or splinter. A work of art.
PLUSSES —
Super-durable, long lasting
Nonporous
Easy to maintain
Hypoallergenic
Waterproof
You can sterilize Pyrex toys by boiling them
Bleachable
Dishwasher safe
Hefty weight
No unpleasant odor
Can be warmed or chilled
Use with both water-based and oil-based lubes.

MINUSES —
More expensive
Hard and inflexible

New Supersoft — a new material that’s has the closest feel to real-life skin. It can be both soft and rigid.
PLUSSES —
Less expensive
Great texture

MINUSES —
Very porous
Less hygienic
Always use with a condom
Use only both water-based lubes.
Difficult to cleanb667.jpg
Distinct rubbery odor

Rubber — An old standard!
PLUSSES —
Inexpensive
Durable, very long lasting
Waterproof
Use with both water-based and oil-based lubes.
Comes in a vast array of colors
MINUSES —
Very porous, less hygienic
Difficult to clean
Distinct rubbery odor

— Next choose Special Features.
Once you’ve decided on the material you want, you can customize your butt plug with special features like:

  • Bendable
  • Inflatable
  • Multi speed vibrating
  • Suction cup

— Next choose Texture.
Latex, silicone and rubber butt plugs come in an array of textures. Which one of these buggers will tickles your fancy?

  • Bulgedtunnel plug1
  • Noduled
  • Nubbed
  • Ribbed
  • Smooth
  • Studded
  • Swirled
  • Veined
  • Velvety

Good luck.

HPV, WTF?

Here’s an exchange I had with a fellow named Angel. He writes:

I have a friend that has HPV. We spoke about being together but I’m nervous about this because I don’t know enough about HPV. Like how safe would I be if we were to mess around and or have sex? I wait to here back from you. Thank you for your time.

Here’s what I know, Angel…

  • HPV (human papillomavirus) is a common virus that infects the skin and mucous membranes.
  • There are about 100 types of HPV. Approximately 30 of those are spread through genital contact (typically fucking). Around 12 of these types are called “low-risk” types of HPV, which can cause genital warts.
  • In addition, there are approximately 15 “high-risk” types of HPV that can cause cervical cancer.
  • It is estimated that 80 percent of all women – and 50 percent of men and women combined – will get one or more types of “genital” HPV at some point in their lives.

As you can see, this is a very widespread virus. However, it’s relatively easy to protect yourself. Use a condom. You were gonna do that anyway, right?stis-1

And, as you probably know, there is a human papillomavirus vaccine is used to prevent infection by HPV strains 16 and 18, which causes most cancers of the cervix, as well as some cancers of the vulva, vagina and penis. Infection with HPV strain 16 also causes most anal cancers and some throat cancers.

This vaccine, given to young men and women ages 9 through 26, prevents pre-cancerous changes that may become cancer. HPV vaccination is currently recommended by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention for all boys and girls ages 11 or 12, and for men and women ages 13 through 26 who have not already received the vaccine or have not completed booster shots.

Depending on the specific vaccine used, it may also prevent genital warts caused by other strains of HPV. This vaccine will not cure an HPV infection that is already present, and does not prevent other sexually transmitted diseases.

condom_STI_titlesThe HPV vaccine is given as a series of three injections into the muscle in the upper arm or thigh. The first shot may be given any time beginning at 9 years of age. The second dose is given 2 months after the first shot, and the third dose is given 6 months after the first shot. The protective effects of the vaccine last for approximately 5 years. Whether or not a booster is needed after five years is not yet known.

Angel writes back with:

Yes ok then sorry I just figured it’s easier to be safe and just not go there. We are really good friends and don’t want to wreck that by worrying about what I may, or may not catch. He doesn’t want me to use condoms for oral sex.

I don’t suppose you happen to know what kind of HPV this person has, do you? That makes a big difference, ya know.

Many people are unclear on the risks associated with oral sex and HPV. It can be passed during oral sex, but it is rare. To reduce the risk of infection during unprotected oral sex, limit exposure to sexual fluids and ensure that no cuts or lesions are present in your mouth or on your partner’s genitals. But, in the end, your safest bet is use a condom. If he doesn’t want you to use a condom, tell him to such his own dick.

Good luck

Porn for women? Ya betcha! – Part 2

We continue what we started earlier in the week, I was all involved in responding to a young woman’s query about porn for women when I ran out of time. Let’s pick up where we left off in Part 1, shall we?

Last week we considered the proliferation of porn for straight women. This week we take a look at some of the other categories of porn for women. Remember this is by no means an exhaustive list. And just so you know, you can find most all of these titles in Dr Dick How To Video Library. Look for a Video Library tab in the header of DDSA for this great sex resource.

Porn for straight couples.

Comstock Films Matt and Khym
New York-based filmmaker Tony Comstock forged his own path in the adult business, creating films previously unseen in the world of porn. Blending a documentary style with hardcore sex, Comstock created a new genre, “pornumentary” or “docuporn”. His films feature real-life couples talking about their relationship and sex lives before having sex on camera. The result is a fresh and revealing look into the lives of real people, and depicts the kind of sex real people have. This is porn without the fakery and cliché so often seen in mainstream porn. It’s erotica with emotion and context.

Anna Span - Hug a Hoodie_mAnna Span
Anna Span is Britain’s first female porn director and she brings a unique perspective to her hardcore films. Her college dissertation was titled “Towards a New Pornography.” She created her first hardcore adult film in 1997, and worked for adult TV channels in the UK. She is the author of the book Erotic Home Video. Her production company, Easy on the Eye, also releases films by other female directors.

Anna’s films are made for both women and men, but she makes a special effort to include more female perspectives in her films, with a focus on female pleasure. Her movies feature excellent acting and engaging plots. Anna Span created a series called Women Love Porn, which features a selection of newer female directors hand-chosen by Anna.

Tristan Taormino chemistry
Tristan Taormino is an author, editor and filmmaker who made a career out of sex education, particularly in the area of anal sex. We’ve featured lots of stuff my Tristan here on Dr Dick’s Sex Advice. Her column and website Pucker Up deals extensively with anal sex and her book; The Ultimate Guide To Anal Sex For Women won a Firecracker award. It was also made into a film in 1999. In 2006 Tristan created her own production company, Smart Ass Productions, so she could create her own brand of porn films. She was honored at the Inaugural Feminist Porn Awards in Toronto in 2006 and her film, Chemistry, won an AVN award in 2007, the first of several such awards and nominations.

Tristan has her own line of educational films with the porn giant, Vivid, called, VividEd. Again, you can find all these titles in Dr Dick’s How To Video Library.

Tristan describes herself as “queer”, saying she dislikes the label “bisexual”. Her films are designed to appeal to women and men of all orientations.

how to fuck in high heelsJoyBear Pictures
Joybear is a another UK-based erotic film company that makes films for both women and men. It was established in 2003 by Justin Ribero des Santos after he won a Playboy filmmaking competition, Joybear creates high-quality, high class explicit films and makes an effort to cater to the real desires of their audience. The company regularly runs surveys and focus groups to determine what it is that people want to see. Which is pretty cool if ya ask me.

 

 

 

 

Porn Movies For Lesbians And Queer People

While girl-on-girl action has long been a mainstay of the porn market, authentic lesbian erotica is still relatively rare. But nowadays, there are a number of people working to create their own brand of lesbian and queer porn, reflecting their own experiences and tastes.

Maria Beatty and Bleu Productions little hot riding hood
Paris-based filmmaker Maria Beatty is world renowned for her innovative and beautiful lesbian erotic films that focus on BDSM. Having previously worked on documentaries about artists, Maria began to make her own special brand of porn in 1994, producing The Elegant Spanking, which received international acclaim. This film documents the intimate sadomasochistic encounters of Maria and a dominant female partner.

Since then Maria has produced an impressive number of adult movies, all exploring “the playful relationship between pleasure and pain” as she says. Her films have been produced independently in order to keep her vision of erotica unblemished by the demands of studios. She also does all the writing, editing, camerawork and production design herself. Maria recently completed a second feature length film called The Boy in the Bathtub, is currently working on is working on other erotic films.

lesbian threesomeMadison Young
San Francisco-based Madison Young describes herself as a “bondage/ fetish model, adult performer, artist, gallerist, activist, published writer, rope slut, queer and feminist.” She runs a non-profit art gallery called Femina Potens and performs in porn to help fund it. She’s an exhibitionist who enjoys exploring the kinkier side of her sexuality on film. And she has been a guest on my SEX WISDOM show. Use the search function in the header, type in Madison Young and Voilà, the two parts of her podcast will appear.

Madison says, “I wanted to be part of a movement of sex positive feminists taking control of their sexuality on film. Somehow documenting my sexual explorations always gave me some unbenounced permission to explore parts of my sexuality that I didn’t feel comfortable exploring in the bedroom. I love the camera. I always used to beg my partners to tape us having sex even before I got into the industry. I believe that it is educational to document honest sexual exploration and experiences and I try to feed into that and put all of my sexual energy into a scene.”

Aside from performing in numerous mainstream porn films, Madison used to run her own website. Madison Bound, but now it’s closed. Her subject matter encompasses many different tastes but usually includes BDSM and a lot of lesbianism.

S.I.R. Productionsprivate thoughts
S.I.R. stands for Sex, Indulgence and Rock n Roll. This company was one of the pioneers of real lesbian erotica and their titles are considered classics. Their movies are legendary for capturing raw emotion, intense chemistry, real orgasms that convey revolutionary queer desire. No wonder their films have played to sold out audiences to almost every LGBT film fest around the world.

 

 

 

 

Porn Movies Like Fifty Shades Of Grey

You’ve probably read Fifty Shades of Grey or know someone who has. Right? And let’s say you’re now keen to see a good smut that offers erotic BDSM. Preferably with a female submissive and a hot guy. Well here’s a short list titles to get you started, but don’t forget to look for all the swell instructional videos available at Dr Dick’s How To Video Library.

the_submission_of_emma_marx_fThe Submission Of Emma Marx
Here’s the story line: Emma Marx is a beautiful, confident, well-adjusted woman. Unfortunately, when it comes to love and romance, all of her previous relationships have turned out to be a bit routine and mundane. Suddenly, that is all changes with a chance encounter with a handsome and mysterious man. He introduces her to a world she had only dared to fantasize about, a world of erotic sex, role-play and BDSM. She is surprised by how a man can so easily strip away her inhibitions and replace them with lust and desire. How is it that he has such control over her? Why does she like it so much? This is her journey of self-discovery and sexual awakening, but it comes with a price. What happens when the greatest love you’ve ever known forces you to face your greatest obstacle – yourself?

 

Shades of Kinkshades of kink
Enter the dark territory of unbridled sexual perversion and fantasy in Sweet Sinner’s taboo-smashing feature film, Shades of Kink. Riley is a sweet, innocent and motivated college grad looking for her first job at Norton Ashe’s marketing firm. The mysterious Ashe is looking to help his new recruit open up her imagination and body to new experiences. With intense drama and explosive performances by Maddy O’Reilly, Andy San Dimas, and Lily LaBeau, Shades of Kink guarantees to re-invent erotica.

 

 

 

Fifty Shades Of Dylan RyanFifty Shades Of Dylan Ryan
Back to award Winning Feminist Pornographer, Madison Young, who I mention just moments ago, brings you Fifty Shades Of Dylan Ryan. Wealthy entrepreneur and book publishing mogul, Ms. Grey, has met her match in young college student and curious submissive, Dylan Ryan. After a sexy and defiant Dylan challenges Ms. Grey to a bet, Dylan forgoes her freedom and submerges herself into a life of total submission, testing her boundaries, proving her servitude through sexual gratification, masked orgies, soaked in female ejaculate, vibrated and fucked to orgasmic heights coupled with fellow sexual servants Bianca Stone and Berretta James. Dylan is whipped to climactic moments of pain and pleasure and collared while cradled in an intimate embrace of tenderness after an aggressive and beautiful journey into the depths of her darkest desires. How fun! Sounds like holiday viewing material, huh?

Ok, that’s it for my porn for women presentation. Hope ya liked it.

What a pain in the ass!

Name: Garth
Gender: Male
Age: 44
Location: South Africa
Hi, I fissured my butt sometime ago and I think it has healed. I have undergone a Lateral Sphincterotomy twice – inner and outer. Unfortunately the area is now VERY sensitive and when I defecate the area ‘screams’ in pain. The softer my stool the worse the pain. When my stool is firm, the pain is less. Will this go away? Is there any medication that I can use?

Everyone in my audience please listen up! I am not a medical doctor, nor do I play one on the internet. The Dr Dick moniker I use refers to my Ph.D. I am a clinical sexologist or a sex therapist if you prefer, not a physician. Get it? Got it? Good!

That being said, anal fissures are a common proctological problem, especially for the heavy ass play crowd. An anal fissure is a tear at the anal tissue. The most common complaint is pain in the anal region during and after taking a dump, itching and possibly some bleeding. Pain and irritation result in spasm of the internal anal sphincter muscle, which then fails to relax during defecation further aggravating the condition.ass-pain

The lateral sphincterotomy you mention is a surgical procedure that removes the fissure. This operation remains the primary form of treatment for chronic anal fissure.

From all that I could learn from my medical consultants, if your surgeries healed properly you shouldn’t be experiencing pain, let alone “screaming pain” when you shit. We all understand that the area will continue to be sensitive, but the pain you describe is not a good sign. You may very well have an infection. You need to have that looked at ASAP. This is nothing to roll around with.

Here’s a tip for all everyone in my audience: pain, of any sort, is one way our body talks to us. Its message is: things are not as they should be; get it fixed NOW. Sometimes the pain will subside when we stop doing something…like holding our hand too close to a flame, or being flogged senseless by Christian Grey. Some pain will only subside when a condition is fixed…like getting a cavity in one’s tooth filled. Other pain, like the emotional pain that come with depression is harder to soothe, but it is important to try. Finally, pain like Garth is experiencing means something is very wrong. And if not attended to immediately, things will only get worse.

Good luck

What just happened?

Name: Selena
Gender: Female
Age: 37
Location:
I have been with the same man for 17 years now. Although he is not the only man I have been with he is most definitely the best. I suppose mostly that’s due to having years to experiment and practice, etc. Anyway, I have always had amazing orgasms all of which require clitoral stimulation regardless of position but the other night I had a gusher; I squirted a lot! He was inside me and I was using my vibrator. And when I got off, there was only this one big release, but there was so much fluid it made a spot on the bed twice the size of a large softball, maybe even larger. At first, I thought it was him until he asked if I was okay and that’s when I felt this warm honey-like feeling fill me. I have never had this happen before and would like to know if it’s normal or not to, all of a sudden, have an orgasm like that? Quite frankly I am not impressed for the fact that it was only 1 big release instead of my usual orgasm where I often climax for up to 2 minutes. And should I be embarrassed? What if his face had been down there? Thanks for your help

I’m so glad to hear that you have been having lots of amazing orgasms, Selena. Good for you! However, it The Amazing G-spotseems to me that you’ve wandered into some new and uncharted orgasmic territory with the one you describe. In fact, it sounds like you’ve had your first ejaculation. There’s nothing abnormal about it, although it’s not all that common.

And why would you be embarrassed to have had an ejaculation while your partner was eating you out?  Hasn’t your man ever busted his nut on your face?  Isn’t it the same thing?  I say, yes.  And no man ever apologizes for that stunt.

There is a lot of controversy about female ejaculation. Well-meaning people in and out of the sex community continue to debate the topic. Women and men, scientists, clinicians, academicians, scientists, and lay people all have very strong opinions that they don’t mind insisting are that last word on the subject. And yet the debate continues to rage. I find that curious. But so much about human sexuality remains controversial. That probably says more about our culture than about sex, but you I’ll bet you know that already.

Anyhow, I’ve written a bit about female ejaculation on my site, there are some podcasts that discuss the topic too. Use the CATEGORY pull-down menu in the sidebar to your right and scroll down till you find ‘Female Ejaculation.’ It’s near the top under the heading, BODY ISSUES.

This is the sort of thing you will discover.

Name: T
Gender: Female
Age: 46
Location: Canada
Do you have any suggestions about FE, I believe I have one once and it was total bliss. But achieving it again is quite another thing.

FE??? Are you talkin’ Female Ejaculation, darlin’? Ok, let’s start with a little background.female genital anatomy

The G-spot (or Grafenberg Spot after the physician who first wrote about it) or Skene’s gland is a small area of spongy tissue just behind the front wall of the vagina, between the back of the pubic bone and the cervix. This is analogous tissue to the male prostate. In fact, the G-spot is sometimes referred to as the female prostate. But like most things sexual, particularly if it has to do with female sexuality, there’s a lot of debate about whether the G-Spot is the same thing as the female prostate. I intend to steer clear of that controversy as much as possible.

In short, what I can tell you for sure is that during early fetal development all fetuses start out being potentially female. This does not change until a male fetus begins to produce its own hormones around the eighth week of gestation. Only then does the physical development of the male and female bodies diverge. Of course, this necessitates that all fetuses initially have structures that could develop into either male or female reproductive and sexual organs. This means the tissue that develops into the male prostate gland must also be present in females. Get it? Got it? Good!

Many women report that their G-area is more sensitive to stimulation than other parts of their internal genitals. To find your very own G-spot, put two fingers in your pussy and curve them upwards, like toward your belly. Now make a “come here” motion, stroking the upper wall of your vagina with a firm, upward pressure. Feel that? That’s your G-spot, darlin’! How fun is this?

female ejaculationFingering yourself like this will probably be more pleasurable if you’re already aroused. Some women have orgasms and/or ejaculate from G-spot stimulation, but not all women ejaculate and not all women find G-spot stimulation pleasurable…wouldn’t ya just know it!

Some women report that they feel like they need to pee when their G-Spot is stimulated. Therefore, I suggest, that before you go rootin’ around in your pussy lookin’ for your g-spot, that you completely empty your bladder. Oh and make sure your fingers are well lubricated throughout your exploration. Even if you have a lot of your own vaginal lubrication, I always suggest the use of a water-based lubricant to augment your own juices.

As an aside, we all know that post-menopausal women experience bouts of vaginal dryness, but even younger women have dry episodes, especially if they are taking antihistamines or antidepressants.

If ya want to hit your G-spot while fucking, may I suggest you try “the woman-on-top — cowgirl” position or the “doggy” position. These are best because your partner’s dick (or strap-on) will be better situated to hit the front wall of your pussy.

***Guys, most women need firmer pressure to the front of their pussy to have a G-Spot orgasm. This might best be accomplished by quick strokes and a lot of deeper friction. But let your partner be your guide.

Like I mentioned earlier, G-Spot stimulation may cause you to ejaculate a small amount of white or clear fluid. Some women produce more ejaculate than others. Just remember, the gushers…the ones you see in porno movies…are faked for your viewin’ pleasure. I mean, come on; some of these videos would scare the fuck out of Noah!

Enjoy your exploration, T. Like I always say, the more you know about the mysterious workin’s of your own personal pussy the more information you’ll be able to share with your own personal partners.

If you’re looking for a swell ‘how to video’ look to Dr Dick’s How To Video Library. Click HERE to see what I found when I did a quick search for ‘female ejaculation’ in my How To Video Library.

Good luck

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