BDSM and consent

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How to stop rough sex crossing the line into abuse By Soraya Auer [W]hen allegations of assault were made against New York’s top prosecutor Eric Schneiderman this week, he denied them, saying engaging in non-consensual sex was a line he would not cross. “In the privacy of intimate relationships, I have engaged in role-playing and …

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Here’s How Consent and BDSM Role-Play Actually Work

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By Alexa Tsoulis-Reay In an article published in The New Yorker, four women detailed the extreme psychological and physical violence they say they experienced at the hands of former New York attorney general Eric Schneiderman. In response, Schneiderman resigned, but he also made a disturbing statement linking these women’s allegations with sexual role play. His …

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Everything you need for a beginner’s kink-friendly Valentine’s Day

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By Colette Bennett If vanilla sex doesn’t really do it for you, imagine the bounty that Valentine’s Day could be if you decided to celebrate it the BDSM-friendly way – with all the necessary kink toys. Whether you’ve always looked at handcuffs with a glint in your eye or got interested in kink thanks to …

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Japanese macaques grinding on deer can teach us to be more open-minded about sex

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by Lux Alptraum [I]f you grew up in America, there’s a good chance that you learned that sex is, first and foremost, a reproductive act. Sure, it feels good, but that’s just a way for our bodies to trick us into breeding. Many church doctrines will inform you that any sexual experience that doesn’t stand …

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How to Get Your Partner to Dominate You During Sex

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By Gigi Engle [T]rying some light BDSM role play is often the go-to for lighting the fire under long-term relationships, often because it’s the simplest fantasy to play out. Over 50% of Americans have reported trying BDSM, and domination play fits perfectly into that BDSM box. For some women, the idea of being dominated is …

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Bugs, Boners and BDSM: A Day in the Life of a Dominatrix

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Because quirks can be quirky. By Andre Shakti “We’ve got a live one, ladies!” Svetlana called out from the office. The scantily clad women seated around the kitchen table barely flinched. Tuesdays were notoriously slow, with our phone lines typically dominated by time wasters. We called them “wankers,” the men who contacted us under the …

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How to Rethink Intimacy When ‘Regular’ Sex Hurts

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There’s no rule that says sex has to be penetrative. By Breena Kerr [W]hen sex hurts, women often feel alone—but they’re not. About 30 percent of women report pain during vaginal intercourse, according to a 2015 study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine which surveyed a subsample of 1,738 women and men ages 18 and older …

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‘I’m 62 and my sex life is more important now than ever’

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By Heather Saul [S]ex is just as important for women after 50: that’s what the European Court of Human Rights made clear when it ruled that the judges who reduced a 50-year-old woman’s compensation for a botched gynaecological operation had discriminated against her. Maria Morais, who is Portuguese and has two children, sought compensation on …

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