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What just happened?

Name: Selena
Gender: Female
Age: 37
Location:
I have been with the same man for 17 years now. Although he is not the only man I have been with he is most definitely the best. I suppose mostly that’s due to having years to experiment and practice, etc. Anyway, I have always had amazing orgasms all of which require clitoral stimulation regardless of position but the other night I had a gusher; I squirted a lot! He was inside me and I was using my vibrator. And when I got off, there was only this one big release, but there was so much fluid it made a spot on the bed twice the size of a large softball, maybe even larger. At first, I thought it was him until he asked if I was okay and that’s when I felt this warm honey-like feeling fill me. I have never had this happen before and would like to know if it’s normal or not to, all of a sudden, have an orgasm like that? Quite frankly I am not impressed for the fact that it was only 1 big release instead of my usual orgasm where I often climax for up to 2 minutes. And should I be embarrassed? What if his face had been down there? Thanks for your help

I’m so glad to hear that you have been having lots of amazing orgasms, Selena. Good for you! However, it The Amazing G-spotseems to me that you’ve wandered into some new and uncharted orgasmic territory with the one you describe. In fact, it sounds like you’ve had your first ejaculation. There’s nothing abnormal about it, although it’s not all that common.

And why would you be embarrassed to have had an ejaculation while your partner was eating you out?  Hasn’t your man ever busted his nut on your face?  Isn’t it the same thing?  I say, yes.  And no man ever apologizes for that stunt.

There is a lot of controversy about female ejaculation. Well-meaning people in and out of the sex community continue to debate the topic. Women and men, scientists, clinicians, academicians, scientists, and lay people all have very strong opinions that they don’t mind insisting are that last word on the subject. And yet the debate continues to rage. I find that curious. But so much about human sexuality remains controversial. That probably says more about our culture than about sex, but you I’ll bet you know that already.

Anyhow, I’ve written a bit about female ejaculation on my site, there are some podcasts that discuss the topic too. Use the CATEGORY pull-down menu in the sidebar to your right and scroll down till you find ‘Female Ejaculation.’ It’s near the top under the heading, BODY ISSUES.

This is the sort of thing you will discover.

Name: T
Gender: Female
Age: 46
Location: Canada
Do you have any suggestions about FE, I believe I have one once and it was total bliss. But achieving it again is quite another thing.

FE??? Are you talkin’ Female Ejaculation, darlin’? Ok, let’s start with a little background.female genital anatomy

The G-spot (or Grafenberg Spot after the physician who first wrote about it) or Skene’s gland is a small area of spongy tissue just behind the front wall of the vagina, between the back of the pubic bone and the cervix. This is analogous tissue to the male prostate. In fact, the G-spot is sometimes referred to as the female prostate. But like most things sexual, particularly if it has to do with female sexuality, there’s a lot of debate about whether the G-Spot is the same thing as the female prostate. I intend to steer clear of that controversy as much as possible.

In short, what I can tell you for sure is that during early fetal development all fetuses start out being potentially female. This does not change until a male fetus begins to produce its own hormones around the eighth week of gestation. Only then does the physical development of the male and female bodies diverge. Of course, this necessitates that all fetuses initially have structures that could develop into either male or female reproductive and sexual organs. This means the tissue that develops into the male prostate gland must also be present in females. Get it? Got it? Good!

Many women report that their G-area is more sensitive to stimulation than other parts of their internal genitals. To find your very own G-spot, put two fingers in your pussy and curve them upwards, like toward your belly. Now make a “come here” motion, stroking the upper wall of your vagina with a firm, upward pressure. Feel that? That’s your G-spot, darlin’! How fun is this?

female ejaculationFingering yourself like this will probably be more pleasurable if you’re already aroused. Some women have orgasms and/or ejaculate from G-spot stimulation, but not all women ejaculate and not all women find G-spot stimulation pleasurable…wouldn’t ya just know it!

Some women report that they feel like they need to pee when their G-Spot is stimulated. Therefore, I suggest, that before you go rootin’ around in your pussy lookin’ for your g-spot, that you completely empty your bladder. Oh and make sure your fingers are well lubricated throughout your exploration. Even if you have a lot of your own vaginal lubrication, I always suggest the use of a water-based lubricant to augment your own juices.

As an aside, we all know that post-menopausal women experience bouts of vaginal dryness, but even younger women have dry episodes, especially if they are taking antihistamines or antidepressants.

If ya want to hit your G-spot while fucking, may I suggest you try “the woman-on-top — cowgirl” position or the “doggy” position. These are best because your partner’s dick (or strap-on) will be better situated to hit the front wall of your pussy.

***Guys, most women need firmer pressure to the front of their pussy to have a G-Spot orgasm. This might best be accomplished by quick strokes and a lot of deeper friction. But let your partner be your guide.

Like I mentioned earlier, G-Spot stimulation may cause you to ejaculate a small amount of white or clear fluid. Some women produce more ejaculate than others. Just remember, the gushers…the ones you see in porno movies…are faked for your viewin’ pleasure. I mean, come on; some of these videos would scare the fuck out of Noah!

Enjoy your exploration, T. Like I always say, the more you know about the mysterious workin’s of your own personal pussy the more information you’ll be able to share with your own personal partners.

If you’re looking for a swell ‘how to video’ look to Dr Dick’s How To Video Library. Click HERE to see what I found when I did a quick search for ‘female ejaculation’ in my How To Video Library.

Good luck

The Naughty & The Nice

Just in time for the holidays, here’s my Naughty and Nice list.

NICE

NAUGHTY

NICELY NAUGHTY

Happy Holidays!

BINGO!

Name: Wondering
Gender: Female
Age: 20
Location: US
Hello, I just discovered your loverly website just now and thought I would ask you a question that has been on my mind for a while. I seem to have a problem orgasming without stimulating my clitoris. I suppose that doesn’t really sound like a problem but it’s really starting to annoy me. I would like to be able to still enjoy an orgasm without having to stimulate my clit every time! I love having sex and it feels super duper good but why can’t I climax that way? I mean I am aware of where my G-spot is and my boyfriend said he’ll be focusing more on hitting it “spot” on. There’s also another thing I have noticed, sometimes my boyfriend will hit my cervix and it hurts a bit, but is this even normal? Should he even be able to hit it? Or is there something abnormal going on here?

Let’s see, when you say you “love having sex and it feels super duper good but why can’t I climax that way?” Are you referring to full-on cock in cooter fucking when you say, “having sex”? The reason I ask is that not everyone means the same thing when they use that trite euphemism.

Since you’re not here to fill in the blanks, so to speak. I’ll assume you want to know why you can’t or haven’t yet had a vaginal orgasm. Before I answer, I just want to say that I hope you are not setting up an orgasmic dichotomy where there doesn’t need to be one. That would truly be unwise.

Ok, now my answer. I can’t really say why your not climaxing while you’re fucking. Other than an exclusively vaginal centered orgasm is a myth. The vast majority of women don’t have vaginal orgasms. In fact the degree of insensitivity inside a woman’s vagina is so high that Kinsey wrote in his seminal work, Sexual Behavior in the Human Female published back in 1953: “Among the women who were tested in our gynecologic sample, less than 14% were at all conscious that they had been touched.” That’s pretty remarkable, wouldn’t you say?

The vaginal orgasm myth is perpetuated, in part, by many a woman’s confusion and/or lack of knowledge about their own anatomy. Some women believe that an orgasm felt during fucking is centered in their cooch. This suggests to me that they aren’t being precise in locating the center of that orgasm. Other women believe in the vaginal orgasm myth because they think they need to conform to a male oriented notion of female sexuality — insertion…fucking = cuming. And that’s wrong, don’t cha know. Just ask all the preorgasmic women out there.

But ya know what? I don’t own a pussy my own self. All I can tell you is what I have learned from those people who actually have a honeypot. The people I’m referring to, we’ll call them females, tell me vaginal orgasms, mythological or not, may simply be dependent on a tone of a woman’s pelvic musculature. As amazing as pussies are, and they are amazing, if the muscles that surround them are not taught and toned enough, a fucking generated orgasm may elude the owner of said pussy.

Some women haven’t developed their PC muscle enough to cum through fucking alone. Are you doing your kegels, Wondering? If you don’t know what I’m talking about, I suggest that you have some serious remedial research to do. You could start by reading around my site and listen to podcasts that feature information on our pubococcygeus muscle and kegel exercises. Check out the CATEGORIES pull down menu in the sidebar to your right. Scroll down till you see the main category — Sex Therapy.  Under that you will discover the subcategory — Kegels and PC muscle.

The elusive vaginal orgasm may also have to do with your partner’s cock, particularly the girth of his unit and opposed to its length. My women friends tell me that a thicker cock may have more of a chance triggering a vaginal orgasm then a pencil dick. No surprise there, I suppose. Position will also play a role. Why not give a bunch of different positions a try and see if they make a difference? You on top cowgirl style, or doggie style might work best. But it’s your coozie, my dear, and you ought to know it best.

As to your G-spot question. That’s another thing all together. I am so glad that you are familiar with your anatomy enough to have found your own personal G-spot. And it’s great to hear that you have an accommodating partner who is working on stimulating this sensitive area. Good for you both! However, while I wholeheartedly endorse and encourage your further investigations and sex play, I do have one caution. I share the concern of my women friends. We want you to avoid all the G-spot hype floating around in the popular culture these days. Most women have a good time with their G-spot exploration. They report that it is not particularly difficult to find, but it’s also much harder to pleasure. If a woman, you perhaps, gets it in your head that something amazing is supposed to happen with a G-spot stimulation, you might be setting yourself up for disappointment. In the same way some women, you perhaps, set themselves up for disappointment if they buy into the myth of an exclusively vaginal generated orgasm.

I encourage you to see your genitals as a whole, not a bunch of separate parts that somehow work independently of one another. If your pussy is happy and your pussy is making you happy, is it really all that important how the happiness comes to be?

In comparison us men folk are not all that fussy. What gets us off; gets us off. I never hear from a guy who is disappointed because he’s having an exclusively prostate generated orgasm. They do happen to some men, but most of us aren’t the least bit concerned when they don’t happen to us. I also never hear from a guy who thinks he should be orgasmic through manipulation of his balls alone. That can happen too, but we’re not holding our breath for that.

What I do hear from guys is that we often need a particular kind of dick-oriented stimulation to get us off. And this is where the men folk and the women folk are much alike. You, like us, probably need a particular kind of stimulation to get you off. Be it vaginal, clitoral, G-spot, or whatever. If you acknowledge your genitals as a composite of parts that work together to bring you joy, then you’ll be less likely to be swayed by the claims, hype and misinformation about female sexual response.

Finally, regarding the issue of your boyfriend hitting your cervix. Yeah, that’ll hurt, don’t ‘cha know. I’d be willing to guess that he’s in the wrong position and being too athletic in his pumping when that happens. If he’s bumping your cervix, but you like the depth and athleticism of his manly thrusts, simply change position. That should remedy the problem.

Good luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Basic Sexual Positions For One And All!

I would like to offer another of my Sexual Enrichment Tutorials. This one is titled: Basic Sexual Positions For One And All!

I’m forever hearing from folks who need a little help with the whole sex positions thing. You wouldn’t think this would be such a bugaboo for so many; but it is. Is it a fear of the unknown? Is it a lack of creativity? Or is it simply a “but we’ve always done it this way” mentality? Whatever the cause of this woeful lack of sexual know-how, Dr Dick is here to spread the good news that you can and ya oughta try something new every now an again.

We will be looking at several positions today — nothing too advanced, mind you, just some basic things you can try that might solve some of the nagging problems I hear about on a regular basis. And here’s the deal — most people are up for at least this amount of sexual experimentation. And who knows where this little adjustment could lead? You may find that if you open the door to change by experimenting with a different position or two, ya’ll could be on your way to lot of other adaptations in the future. And experimentation is the very best way to prevent your fucking from getting boring.

Ok, so we’re all well acquainted with the so-called “missionary position,” right? This is the man on top, woman on the bottom position, just the way god likes it. Or the way the Christian missionaries thought it should be when they discovered lots of pagan folk were having way too much fun with all those exotic positions.

Despite it being much maligned, the good old missionary position is swell if you like face-to-face fucking. And that’s never a bad place to start. This position allows for a lot of physical front-to-front body contact including kissing. Lots of folks like this position because of intimacy it provides. I hasten to add that this isn’t the only position that allows for face-to-face fucking, but I don’t want to get too far ahead of myself.

The downside of this position is it can be a whole lot of work for the partner on top, while being really confining for the partner on the bottom. This is especially true if the guy on top is of the jumbo variety. It also isn’t the best position for the woman if she’s fucking a guy with a big dick. Men obviously love this position because it gives them easy access to their partner’s tits. It’s not so pretty good if he wants to get his hands on her clit. But since most guys have a fairly good idea what to do with a pair of knockers, and are often perplexed with what to do with a clit, this is fine with them. Unfortunately, this position can leave a woman woefully unsatisfied.

A couple could vary things a bit by having the woman sit on the couch, legs spread with her man on the floor on his knees. This way he could happily plug away at her without weighting her down. Also the guy won’t have to balance himself with his hands while looming over his woman, as in the missionary position. This will free his hands to roam all over his partner’s body. Just think; with a little luck he could actually stumble upon the woman’s clit. And wouldn’t that be a red-letter day for all concerned? This position can be hell on one’s knees, however.

The opposite of the traditional missionary position is the “woman on top,” or “cowgirl” position. This is a sweet position for a chick mostly because it allows her to fully control the speed and depth of her man’s thrusts.  All the woman has to do here is climb on her man while he lay on his back. With her legs to either side of his hips, she can easily access his cock for a nice hand job before she guides it home. Since she’ll be able to move up or down his body at will, she can direct his dick at her clit and use it like a dildo. This is also a great position for anyone who wants to experiment with ass fucking. And all the while the man will still have free access to his partner’s boobs, so you know he’ll be as happy as a pig in shit.

There’s also the “reverse cowgirl, which is exactly like the “cowgirl, only completely different. In the reverse cowgirl position, the chick faces away from her man. He gets to admire and slap her ass and pull her hair. The woman, on the other hand, gets complete access to the guy’s johnson and his family jewels. Women, feel free to give you guy’s huevos a nice squeeze and don’t forget to tug on them too. Men generally do this while they’re jerkin off, so he’ll already be familiar with the sensations. Ya see, most men get off on ball play big time. Once the guy is inside of the woman in the position, his wang will hit the back of her vagina as opposed to the front. Lots of women like this because of the very different stimulation it provides.

If you’re lookin to stay with a more traditional style consider the benefits of spooning. It’s kinda like the missionary position, except you’re both on your side. Right away you can see the benefits of that, huh? He can still wrap you up in his big burly arms and even throw a leg over you for that complete sensu-round sensation. You can spoon face-to-face, or back to front. This makes for an effortless fuck. So much so that couples have been known to doze off mid screw in this position. Perfect for when lovers are too pooped for an athletic pop.

Then there’s the ever-popular “doggy style,” or “rear-entry” position. This is well suited to both pussy fuckin and ass fuckin. In this position the bottom will be on his/her knees face down, while his/her partner takes him/her from behind. The best part of this position is the freedom you’ll both have to use your hands. If the woman is on the bottom, she can prop herself up with one hand and still have the other free to diddle her clit or grab her man’s nuts between her legs. If the man’s on the bottom, he can take it up the ass with relative ease. If the woman is on top she can grab her partner’s hips and peg him with ease. If the man is on top he can hold on to his partner’s hips with one hand and still have the other to manhandle her hooters. What this position might lack in face-to-face intimacy it makes up for in vigorous fun.

For a sweet gentle fuck a woman could try sitting in her man’s lap. He’s seated in a chair, or cross-legged on the floor, while she sits astride his lap. She can mount him face-to-face, or with her back to him. This position doesn’t allow for whole lot of athletic thrusting, but it’s fantastic for some delicious slow rhythmic rocking. And the top partner will be able to set the rhythm. Both partner’s hands will be totally free to tweak one another’s nipples. Or the woman could guide his hands to her clit and show him what’s up down there.

Lastly, there the good old fashioned stand up position. This is particularly appropriate for those desperately horny moments that allow for only a quick, zip-less fuck. If the man is a strapping lad, he’ll have no problem sweeping the little woman off her proverbial feet and planting his boner inside her. This will take a bit of balance and stamina, particularly on the part of the dude, but these overheated hormonally driven fucks won’t last very long, if ya catch my drift.

Remember, you don’t need to stick to just one of these positions per screw. You can mix and match and change positions at will. You can even make a game of it. One of you could decide upon the position while the other of you determines the type of movement, angle of penetration, rhythm and speed.

Now, go forth and be creative, why don’t cha already.

Almost Heaven

Hey sex fans,

I know; let’s make this Friday a Product Review Friday!

Ya’ll have probably noticed that everyone on the Dr Dick Review Crew has taken a break from reviewing. The truth of the matter is we all seemed to hit our saturation point at once. I guess we all experienced a little burn out.

I know, some of you must be thinking, gee, I should have such a problem; burning out on sex toys. Let me tell ya; no one who has actually had to honestly review sex toys would make that comment. Because, despite the fun aspects of reviewing them the review process itself can, and often is, grueling.

So just about the time we were about to throw in the towel, we were approached by a new partner in our review effort, the good people who are responsible for The Romance Series videos.

As you know, we’ve reviewed educational videos in the past; so it wasn’t much of a leap to include these excellent enrichment videos.

To explain what I’m talking about we have Dr Dick Review Crew member Jada to tell you all about the DVD she viewed.

Almost Heaven  ——  $29.95

Jada
My husband is a porn aficionado. He’s been watching porn since he was a teenager. Frankly, I can’t see how he can stomach the mind-numbing sameness of it all. For the most part, every thing I’ve tried to watch with him has been a disappointment.

Don’t get me wrong; I love sex. I love stories about sex; I have a fantastic erotica library. I love depictions of sex; I thoroughly enjoy Dr Dick’s The Erotic Mind podcasts and their accompanying slideshows of the artwork of his guest. But, for the most part, I do not like porn. I want to like porn; it’s just that I rarely see anything I can like.

I’ll admit it; I need a bit of a story line to get into the sex. I want the characters to be believable and I want the women in the movies to be more than one dimensional sex dolls. I don’t know, is that too much to ask for?

When Dr Dick asked me if I would consider reviewing one of The Romance Series titles, I hesitated. I wanted to do it, because it would be something my husband and I could do together, but I didn’t want to waste my time or his. I finally agreed and I stopped my Dr Dick’s and picked up Almost Heaven.

I was pleasantly surprised to find the DVD housed in a very tasteful, yet erotic package. The DVD comes in a traditional plastic package, but this is sheathed in a cardboard carton that give is a much warmer presentation. The promotional imagery on the box is suggestive, but not overt. It’s obvious that this presentation is geared to a female audience.

When I got home I tantalizing waved the package in my husband’s face. I said, “Look what I scored.” His eyes rolled up in his head and dismissed my find with a wave of his hand. I was crestfallen. He didn’t mean to be mean; he just thinks porn for women means toning down the sex till it’s soft-core pabulum.

I asked him to put aside his prejudice and watch it with me. He said he would.

Our date night arrived, we got comfortable in bed and I slipped the Almost Heaven DVD in the player. I hoped for the best.

Almost immediately my husband commented on the production values. The audio track was clear and balanced, and he didn’t notice any background noise. Apparently this is a big bugaboo for pornophiles, like my husband. I was just happy that a bunch of fake boobs weren’t jumping out at me from the screen.

It was easy for me to slip into the storyline. A pretty young woman, Angie, is told that she died the night before and is able to take only one memory with her into the afterlife. She chooses to remember her husband, Jake. But what memory of Jake should she choose? Another couple, Sara and Michael, helps Angie make the right choice. It’s a sweet concept. In fact, it was like watching a mainstream movie, but getting to see all the sex, which would only implied in a Hollywood version.

There are four scenes in the movie. The music, lighting and camerawork are all topnotch. Each scene is a sexual vignette featuring a different couple, but all the scenes follow the story arc. And ya know what I liked most? Condoms were used throughout. Kudos to The Romance Series people for being considerate to their performers and respectful to their audience. Thank you!

I was totally impressed with how the sex was presented. Despite the romantic overlay, this is a full-on sex movie, mind you — oral, cowgirl, spooning, doggie, missionary, all very tastefully presented. The chemistry between the couples is palpable, there is lots of kissing and the sex is hot. I couldn’t have asked for more. And I caught my husband adjusting his boner under the covers more than once.

My husband said Almost Heaven is not a porn movie for women, whatever that is; but it’s a really great porn movie for couples.  High praise coming from him.

If you’re looking for a bit of romance and plot with your sex, this title is bound to please. It was just the thing to get our motors running for the sex we had after the movie. It was the perfect date night!
Full Review HERE!

Enjoy

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