Hey sex fans!
It’s Product Review Friday once again. Following the trend of the last few weeks we have the pleasure of welcoming a new product line by a new manufacturer…well new to us anyhow. Welcome Futuring International Ltd; a German company that manufacturers fine personal lubricants.
Dr Dick Review Crew members — Ken & Denise and Mick & Chuck will introduce you to these new lube products.
Dr.Love Silkening Lubricant —— $21.99
Ken & Denise
Ken: “This is sure enough a German product. You can tell by just looking at the package. The fine print comes in three languages; the primary one is German. I think they used a computer program for the translation into English.”
Denise: “What does that have to do with anything?”
Ken: “Nothing really. Just making a point about authenticity. This is the real deal. Oh and remember when we first looked at the package we weren’t able to tell what kind of lube it was?”
Denise: “Right! Nothing on the package says silicone-based. So we were a bit confused at first. The promotional materials that came with Dr.Love spelled it out, but there was nothing on the package that says so. And it’s important to know that sort of thing, because you wouldn’t want to use this lube with silicone toys. Maybe they just need to add a little stick-on label that says silicone-based. Just a thought.”
Ken: “Dr.Love is a lighter consistency than some of the other silicone-based lubes I’ve used. But it is thicker than your average water-based lube. It’s really silky to the touch and it has plenty of glide. You can tell it’s a quality lube, because you only need a little bit to make things slick as shit. And it’s a slick feeling, not a greasy feeling. There is a big difference, ya know.”
Denise: “There’s no significant smell or taste, which is very appealing to me. It’s also latex and condom safe.”
Ken: “Dr.Love stands up to water very nicely, so it’s great to use in the shower. I love to squeeze one off in shower in the morning, so this a perfect lube for that. You’ll need soap and water for a thorough cleanup.”
Denise: “I thought it dried out a bit quicker than other silicone-based lubes we’ve tried especially when we do anal. But when I use it by myself for self-pleasuring, either with my hand or a toy, it last and lasts. I don’t understand why the discrepancy, but there ya have it.”
Ken: “We used Dr.Love in place of massage oil too and loved it. It feels great on our skin.”
Denise: “And I even used it on my hair as a conditioner; so there’s that. In fact, we went through our 3.4 fl.oz. container in less than a month. So you know we loved this stuff.”
Full Review HERE
Get MAXXX —— $21.99
Mick & Chuck
Mick: “Our package of Get MAXXX clearly states: ‘purest silicon (sic) lubricant, 
Made in Germany.’ So we weren’t the least bit confused as to what kind of lube this was.”
Chuck: “We thought Get MAXXX worked best during our stroke sessions. It lubricates without reducing sensation and that’s important when we have one of our marathon sessions.”
Mick: “Yeah, we try to see who can outlast the other. So this is the perfect lube for those edging contests.”
Chuck: “Get MAXXX is long lasting and remains slick and silky, which makes fucking a joy. I hate it when lubes get sticky! It’s completely hypoallergenic too. Ya gotta love that. I love the pump container.”
Mick: “Remember, silicone-based lubes and silicone toys don’t mix!”
Chuck: “Get MAXXX has no discernable taste and it’s odorless.”
Mick: “It has a surprisingly light consistency, but like I’ve already mentioned; it holds up really well when things get hot and heavy.”
Chuck: “This stuff is fantastic with our glass dildos. It’s also latex and condom safe.”
Mick: “Get MAXXX is about as health-conscious a lube as you will find anywhere. It stands up great to water (think shower, hot tub, whatever). My skin actually feels better after I use this stuff. I love it.”
Chuck: “Back to the packaging; the pump top can be locked by twisting it while it’s in the up position. It also comes with a plastic top lock that covers the spout to keep the lube from accidentally leaking out all over the place. That’s a real thoughtful addition, I can tell ya. I’ve had the misfortune of having a lube bottle open all over my toy box once. I was fuckin mad as hell.”
Full Review HERE
ENJOY!
Hey sex fans!
I’m delighted to welcome two distinguished new manufacturers to Dr Dick’s Sex Toy Reviews — VirtuallyAdult and RubyGlass21. They’ve come up with an exquisite line of glass butt plugs that will both dazzle and delight.
Crystal Delights Blue Anal Plug —— $79.98
Dr Dick
Friends, are you tired of not having anything dazzling to wear on those special 
occasions when you want to look and feel your best? Ya know, like when you’re runnin’ the Hoover, taking out the trash (rubbish or BF), or pickin out something butch at Home Depot? Well dear readers, I have just the thing for you. Lookie here! It’s a Crystal Delights Blue Anal Plug, or butt plug if you prefer. This is no ordinary plug, no siree; it’s bejeweled! So it will dress up any outfit, or no outfit at all.
That’s right, sex fans, I’m wearing mine now! Because, like you, I want to have a smile on my face and a spring in my step when I face all of life’s tedious tasks like typing this review, laundering my unmentionables or cookin’ up a mess of grits for the church social. And the beauty part of this little stunner is that no one would ever guess I’m enjoying a butt-load of delicious pleasure unless they turned me upside down and discovered the authentic Swarovski crystal rockin out where the sun don’t shine.
My Crystal Delights Blue Anal Plug is a high quality, hand crafted ultra smooth Pyrex glass insertable manufactured by RubyGlass21 and customized by VirtuallyAdult. The plug features a petite spade-shaped head with a maximum diameter of no more than an inch. This sits gracefully atop an unusually long 2” stem that finally flares out to make the base, in which is embedded the sapphire-like crystal. The Crystal Delights Blue Anal Plug is about 5 inches tall and weighs in at approximately 6 ounces. I say the stem is unusually long, because most all the other plugs I’ve seen and/or used are squatter. Now that I’ve tried both, I tend to like the longer-stemmed plug even better than the shorter ones. And god knows I love the shorter ones a lot. I’m also thinkin that this lovely would rock out as a pussy plug too. Imagine the luscious G-spot massage you’d get with each and every step you take.
Everyone has a butthole and the Crystal Delights Blue Anal Plug is an equal opportunity pleasure plug. That being said, I want to address the rest of my comments to my fellow prostate owners. You know how passionate I am about prostate health and prostate self-awareness, right? Well I am of the mind that every guy oughta own at least one butt plug and use it regularly. Beside the pleasure it delivers it has verifiable health benefits.
A plug will massage your P-spot and that’s a big part of a maintaining prostate health. And for us more senior men, and the heartbreak of enlarged prostate we so frequently suffer, butt plug therapy can help there too. I mean I’m all in favor of toys that have no other purpose than to dispense a good dose of the jollies. But if a fella can pleasure himself AND do himself some good health-wise…all at the same time; well that just about beats the pants off diddlin’ just for fun. Right?
Those of you who regularly follow our reviews will know that all the Dr Dick Review Crew loves us some glass toys. They’re gorgeous, of course, but that’s only the beginning. They are versatile too. You can warm and chill beautiful art glass toys, like the Crystal Delights Blue Anal Plug, for added sensations. And you can use any kind of lube you want. You’ll only need little bit too, because glass gets real slick with just a dab of lube. The petite head on this baby will slip effortlessly into your bum and stay put for hours of glorious backdoor recreation.
Full Review HERE
ENJOY!
Sex Fans,
It’s Product Review Friday once again and the Dr Dick Review Crew is about to bring you some might fine stuff.
A couple of weeks ago we introduced you to one of our newest manufacturers — Blush Novelties and their Eve’s Rabbit.
Today Joy walks us around another fine Blush Novelties massager.
And just in time for National Condom Week February 14-21, Brad has some amazing condoms from Sweden, called RFSU condoms to tell you about. You’re gonna love these!
Magic Massager —12 Function, 3 Attachments —— $46.30
Joy
Can you believe it’s 2010 already? I’ve been a Review Crew member for two and a half years. And in that time I’ve had the pleasure of introducing you to a load of great products, but also some not so great as well.
Today’s review falls squarely into the great product category. I want to tell you about the Magic Massager from Blush Novelties. This thing is phenomenal. It’s a mini-wand type of vibrator; it’s only about 8 inches long from tip to tail. It’s powered by 4 AA batteries (not included in the package).
One would expect a diminutive vibe like this to carry only 2 AA batteries, right? Well, maybe it’s the two extra batteries, but whatever it is this thing is the strongest vibrator, per inch, I have ever used. It rocks my world, baby!
It features a 12-mode vibration system with a LED control panel. Can ya stand it? I mean, come on; that’s freakin overkill, ain’t it? Honestly, the first time I had the Magic Massagerworking its …ahhh magic on my girly parts, I couldn’t honestly say I got beyond the first 5 modes before I got off TWICE! It’s that great. When I took the time to investigate all the modes, I was able to distinguish between all the vibration functions. There’s this one, #9 I think, that is totally crazy. It feels like the thing is running out of power and just when you think it’s gonna die it come roaring back to life. Loved it! And even when the Magic Massager is rockin out, it’s pretty quiet.
One thing to note, the user has to cycle through all of the modes to get to the one she likes the best. But there is an off button that stops the vibe altogether, which is much appreciated.
The Magic Massager comes with 3 soft and pliable attachments — a dome shape, a flat grooved shape and a beaded shape. The beaded shape is my favorite. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find any information on the package about what the attachments are made of. I am pretty sure it’s not silicone. I used a silicone-based lube with it and it appears to be fine. (Note to manufacturer: it’s always a good idea to include information on the materials used in producing the toy. This helps the consumer make an educated decision on if it is right for her/him.)
Besides the vibrating functions and the three attachments, this puppy is waterproof. And anyone who follows my reviews knows I’m all about bringing toys to the bath.
Full Review HERE
Next up we have two styles of RFSU condoms for review. They come to us courtesy of our friends at O!Zone Condoms, the exclusive American importer of RFSU condoms from Sweden.
Okeido 3-Pack —— $6.00
Brad
I’m not one of those guys who throws a hissy fit over having to wear a condom when I fuck. I 
happen to think it’s a sign of respect to the lady I’m about to bone. She doesn’t always know where my johnson has been and I rarely know where her meatpie has been. So it just makes sense. I mean, the more of a big deal ya make about this simple health and safety thing the more of a douchebag you are. So fuckin get over it already.
Today I have the pleasure of introducing you to two of the amazing RFSU condoms. The first is Okeido. I don’t know what that mean, or even if it has a meaning. Maybe it’s Swedish for abbondanza. Ok, so here’s the deal. Okeido is a slightly larger sheath for us bigger boys — length 190 mm., width 53 mm. They’re silky to the touch, silicone-lubed, ultra-thin, have a fuller reservoir tip and they’re a perfect fit.
This Swedish company, RFSU (the Swedish Association for Sexuality Education), is known for their stringent quality testing as well as for their pleasure-enhancing designs. Here, here!
And here’s something I’ve never seen before. These rubbers are vegan! I suppose you’re gonna ask; what makes a condom vegan? Well, I’ll tell ya; the Vegan Action Foundation certifies that no animal products of any kind were used in the manufacturing of these condoms nor were any animals used in product testing. This makes them a bit pricier than your run of the mill condoms. But you’re not gonna get greener than this and they make for an integral component of a cruelty-free lifestyle! And that is totally my style.
Birds ‘N Bees 3- Pack —— $6.00
These babies, like their Okeido siblings, are also vegan. They’re silky to the touch, silicone-lubed, ultra-thin and have a reservoir tip.
The Birds ‘N Bees style is ribbed and bumped for added sensations. Mmmm, ribbed and bumped! I actually have a preference for a textured condom. But these are not quite as roomy as the Okeido — length 185 mm., width 52 mm. They’re not uncomfortable, mind you, just snug. These would be idea for the man with an average endowment.
Now all we have to do is get them to make a ribbed and bumped version of the larger condoms.
Despite the fact that these are vegan, they are still latex. So you folks out there with a latex sensitivity need to look elsewhere. And for god sake, guys, use a personal lube when you groovin’, especially when you’re wearing a glove. And make sure it’s water-based or silicone-based though. Oil-based lube and latex condoms do not mix.
Full Review HERE
ENJOY
Hey sex fans,
It’s product review Friday!
Not only do we welcome a new manufacturer today, ELBOW GREASE, we have a new Dr Dick Review Crew member to introduce.
Please join me in welcoming Jack Cascade. Read about his personal journey as a single man living a year without sex HERE! He hastens to add that masturbation is allowed and encouraged.
ELBOW GREASE Light —— $4.75
[editors note: I want to say a word about the ELBOW GREASE company’s background. It was founded back in 1979, long before the onset of the AIDS crisis and thus the pressing need for condoms. So these folks were one of the pioneers of the personal lube phenomenon. Back then, gay men were more likely to use Crisco as a lubricant for their intense fuck sessions. This became a huge problem, because Crisco, if not stored properly, would go rancid in time. And when it did, you, your partner(s), your sheets and your bedroom would stink like week old french-fries. Trust me, it wasn’t pleasant. Happily, Elbow Grease Original Cream put an end to that annoying sexual faux pas when it exploded onto the market. Finally, we had an alternative to a vat of smelly vegetable shortening rotting under the bed. ELBOW GREASE is greaseless and odorless, but still thick and creamy. It revolutionized the way we had partnered sex as well as simply jerkin off. Without further ado here’s Jack.
Jack Cascade
For review purposes, the Elbow Grease people sent us a 1 oz container of their ELBOW GREASE Light.
I must admit that I’m not a big fan of mineral-based cream lubricants. If it’s thick and creamy, I just feel like it belongs on my face. Before you get any brilliant visual images, I’m talking about Noxzema. My mother uses it religiously on her own face. Though she swears by it, I never adopted the habit. Needless to say, the association of mom when I pop open a canister of creamy lube is dis-engorging to say the least. Furthermore, why lather on a thick cream, unless there’s a fun way to get it off. Now forget about mom and visualize that facial you were thinking about before.
I may have to start a new devotion to ELBOW GREASE Light formula. One liberal application to your cock and I bet you won’t last as long as the lubricant. Silly me, I tried this creamy stuff on a latex condom suited toy without much luck. They just don’t seem to be made for each other. And guess what? Actually they’re not. Who reads labels before taking the plunge? Not me!
Full Review HERE
ELBOW GREASE Hot —— $4.75
Jack Cascade
The promotional claim reads: ELBOW GREASE Hot Cream is of the same thick consistency as the Original formula but, it heats up! The Hot formula is a mineral oil-based, warming, thick cream lubricant. It stands beside its Original brother as the oldest warming cream formula on the market today. The warming agent in our formula is menthol.
For review purposes, the long-established Elbow Grease people sent us a 1 oz container of their ELBOW GREASE Hot.
I want to know who the hell thought it’d be a good idea to promote the sensation of burning to a throbbing cock. Some sadist, perhaps? For most men out there, the thought of heat and burning anywhere near our precious penis is enough to shut down the erector set and make us want to put the toys away. The fact that the active ingredient to create the “warming” sensation in ELBOW GREASE Hot is menthol seems to be quite the misnomer.
Whatever brilliant mind came up with this marketing mistake needs to be shot at dawn. Whatever happened to menthol being associated with sensations of fresh and, I don’t know, cool? The real benefit of ELBOW GREASE Hot has yet to be marketed. However, I’m pretty proud that I was able to find some enjoyable uses for this stuff. First off, forget about using it to jack off or to fuck with.
The real titillation comes when you apply a liberal amount, rub in, wait a couple of minutes while the menthol works its magic. Ok, ok so it does work on your dick. But the second time I used ELBOW GREASE Hot lubricant, I slathered it on my balls and perineum, then waited a bit. Within minutes, an intense tingling, COOLING sensation (some may consider this a warming sensation) had my cock harder than before. However, I kept it off my shaft. Here’s the key to using this product: don’t be afraid to experiment.
Full Review HERE
ENJOY!
Hi Dr Dick,
Happy (belated) New Year! I have two questions for you:
1. I am taking a long time to cum when I’m given a blowjob or hand job and eventually I need to stroke off on my own (for a pretty long time as well). However, I cum pretty quickly when I masturbate while watching porn. Am I masturbating to porn too much? I have also masturbated to porn for years before I started having sex recently (I’m not sure whether this could be a reason as well).
2. You mention that we shouldn’t use soup while cleaning our anus. Why is that so? I just read about douching but I have been cleaning my anus with warm water, soap, and finger. Is that ok?
Thanks in advance! — Ken
Can’t hardly say if you are masturbating to porn too much. I mean, what is too much anyway? And since you don’t go into detail; I’ll let that issue rest.
What I can tell you is that partnered sex, regardless of the activity (blowjobs, hand jobs or 
full-on fucking) is a whole lot different than solo sex (with or without porn). I can also assure you that your body has become sensitized to your particular grip and stroke over the years of you pullin your own pud. Another person’s grip and stroke (pussy or asshole) will rarely satisfy in the same efficient manner. This is not a bad thing, necessarily, but you do have to keep that in mind. And perhaps your sexual response will change with time as you enjoy more and varied partnered sex.
In terms of you taking too long (whatever that means) to cum when you are with a partner, maybe you need to quit trying so hard to get off and lay back and enjoy the sensations you’re getting from your partner. And here’s a tip; use your biggest sex organ, your brain, to replay some of that hot porn action in your head while you are gettin head. That will surely hasten things along, if ya know what I mean.
In terms of your next question about keeping your hole clean; you may have misunderstood previous comments I’ve made about anal douching. Soap and water is the preferred method of keeping the outside of your ass clean. And while you’re scrubbin’ your crack, you could use your fingertip to clean out your rosebud. But don’t force soap beyond your sphincter. You have delicate membranes in your rectum that will be irritated by the soap, even a mild soap.
If you need to douche, I suggest a solution of a few drops of lemon juice in warm water. Some men prefer the convenience of a shower bidet.
Name: Mike P
Gender: Male
Age: 25
Location: Los Angeles
My girlfriend needs to watch lesbian porn to get off and sometimes kicks me out of the bedroom to masturbate by herself. Initially I was turned on by her desire to watch porn — but now — it’s become a blockage. She always needs porn. I am frustrated and to make things worse — she has started abusing me through financial manipulation. I have to pay her rent — pay for her food, pay everything — and she never gives me nookie.
Should I leave this woman?
Time to wake up, fella! Your “girlfriend” — and I use that term very loosely — is decidedly 
not YOUR girlfriend, and possibly not any man’s girlfriend. I’m gonna go way out on a limb here and say; I think your “girlfriend” is a certifiable, died-in-the wool, muff-divin’, coochie-lovin’ lesbiterian. All that remains for her to do, to make the picture perfectly clear…even for you, is to show up one day in a mullet and a flannel shirt. Holy cow, Mike, how is it that you are missing the obvious?
Listen, bub, you’re excess baggage. Your “friend” keeps you around for comic relief…oh and to foot the bill.
Should you leave this woman; you ask. Honey, she’s beaten you to the punch on that one. She’s long gone and done left you way behind, at least emotionally and sexually. All you need to do is find the door, say good-bye to this sorry situation and make a hasty exit.
Name: Michelle
Gender: Female
Age: 22
Location: Canada
Tips to help when the man you’re sleeping with has a small penis.
Tips? No pun intended, I hope.
Ok, here goes — Tip #1, grin and bear it. Tip #2, find a guy with more pork. Tip #3, get a dildo. Tip #4, find a sexual position, like doggie style, that will make the most of every little bit of pecker the poor guy’s got. Tip #5, remember it ain’t always da meat, but it is always da motion.
Ok, seriously I do have a couple of suggestions beyond the flippant ones I just mentioned. For example, Tip #3 still stands. Find yourself a dildo, one that your partner can wield when he’s around. If you introduce the concept in a positive way, you may find that Mr. Mini-meat will go for it big time. You see, most guys with small endowments already know they may have a problem satisfying some women (or men for that matter). But most guys, regardless of cock size, are always interested in pleasuring their partner, even when it’s not with their own magic wand.
May I suggest that you check out the swell array of dildos available at Dr Dick’s Stockroom? You’ll find a link to this treasure trove on the top of this page. Hey, you may even want to shop online together. You may be surprised at the one your guy picks out for you.
While you lovebirds are checking out the dildo section at Dr Dick’s Stockroom, take a moment to search for a Cyberskin Penis Extension.
You’re gonna love this. The new Cyberskin line of products represents a significant advance in pecker extensions that feel like the real thing. The rubber on the surface of this extension feels hauntingly like human skin. But the inside part of the (1.5″ or 3″) extension is much firmer. It is soft and supple on the surface, but hard and rigid inside. Mmmm, hard and rigid!
Visually, the shape, texture, and coloration of these extensions are designed to create a 
realistic effect as well. They look realistic and they feel realistic.
There’s a trick to putting on one of these puppies, don’t ‘cha know. You roll up the sleeve until it’s all the way up around the extension. Then place it against the head of your guy’s stiff dick. Roll the bugger down snugly around his unit, sealing his peanut inside the sleeve. A partial seal will form, helping keep the extension on during the fuck-fest.
Wearing this extension will add both length and thickness to his precious willie. It will of course reduce the sensation in his cock, but that’s not always bad thing. Guys with a short fuse may find the decrease in stimulation an aid to controlling his ejaculation, while he’s giving more and longer pleasure to his partner. And a lot of guys love the feeling of having their cock sealed inside the rubbery sleeve. Mmmm, sealed inside rubbery sleeve!
Name: Jack
Gender: Male
Age: 42
Location: Milwaukee
I’ve been dating this guy for over a year. He is the love of my life. I love him so much, but he treats me like shit. I met him on vacation in Florida. He’s 26 a stunning, 6’3” 200lbs, blond surfer Adonis. And excuse me for being so graphic; he has the biggest dick I’d ever seen. The first time we had sex I saw stars. He filled me up like no other person has.
When I got home we exchanged emails nearly every day and even had some hot phone sex a couple of times. He was down on his luck, because he lost his barista job for coming to work stoned too many times. I know I shouldn’t have, but I invited him to come live with me. I flew him up, but I told him that this wouldn’t be a free ride, he’d have to stop smoking so much dope and get a job and he agreed.
The sex was fantastic for the first couple of months, but once he established himself as a star at the gym he found his own friends and now I don’t see too much of him. He eats my food and drinks my liquor and drives my car. I pay for his cloths and gym membership. He has yet to find a job.
I know I should just end it, but I love him and I would really miss the sex. My friends ridicule me for thinking he loves me as much as I love him. They tell me they know he sees other guys. I’m so turned around I don’t know what to do.
Like my momma always used to say: if it’s got wheels or a dick, you know you’re gonna have problems with it. And I would add, if it’s got big wheels or a big dick you know you’re gonna have BIG problems with it.
Before we turn our attention to your no good boyfriend, let me make a few quick 
observations about you. You’re a freakin’ mess, girlfriend! I mean really, you’ve broken all the cardinal rules about dating a hustler. I know, I can hear you now…oh no Dr Dick, he’s not a hustler; he’s a good kid who’s just down on his luck and I’m just trying to help. Bullshit!
Ya see, that’s the first cardinal rule of dating a hustler is never lose sight of the fact that he’s a hustler and you’re his john. Don’t get me wrong; I have the deepest admiration for hustlers and their johns. It’s just that this arrangement only works if everyone is clear about the ground rules. And here are the ground rules — rich older gentleman connects with needy younger hunky stud for mutual benefit. Rich older gentleman keeps needy younger hunky stud in room and board, booze, cloths, car, gym membership and the like; and needy younger hunky stud buggers rich older gentleman senseless with his big blond surfer-boy dick. Get it? Got it? Good!
Second cardinal rule — what happens on vacation should stay on vacation. Vacation sex, as wonderful and delicious as it may be, does not transplant very well to your non-vacation life. You’re more likely to have success transplanting a delicate tropical orchid to your Milwaukee backyard than transplanting a vacation hustler fuck to your work-a-day world back home.
Third cardinal rule —don’t try to gloss a perfectly fine, fully functional and even an affectionate hustler/john relationship with talk of love. It’s unnecessary, unseemly and untrue. It’s lust, it’s limerence, it’s love sickness, whatever…it’s just not love. Because LOVE don’t ever make you feel as bad as you’re feelin’. Probably your friends would have less difficulty with your mooning over this guy if you were more honest about the nature of this relationship. They wouldn’t be rubbing your face in the evidence that surfer-boy is pluggin’ other dudes.
Fourth cardinal rule — a size queen, like you Jack, should admit that you are enamored with the guy hose and how it fills you up plain and simple. To pretend that you would string yourself out like this for a guy with tiny meat is just that — pretense. Listen, there’s nothin’ wrong with bein’ a size queen, it’s the dishonesty I object to.
How is this young fella ever supposed to respect you when you don’t respect for yourself? He probably had you pegged (no pun intended) back on the beach in the sunshine state. He knows you will tolerate his misbehavior, which of course gives him permission to do whatever he feels like doing whenever he feel like doing it. And now he don’t even have to give up the occasional mercy fuck any more, even though that was surely part of the deal at the get go, right?
So the waif has yet to find a job after a year, huh? Why is that not surprising? But even a hustler needs his mad money, besides what is doled out to him by his long-suffering john. I’d be willing to guess Mr. surfer dude is turning tricks to keep himself in weed and other essentials.
Thing is, this fellow probably would have treated you better if you would have just stuck to the hustler/john script. Ya see, kids like this need structure. He may have looked to you for this at one time, but when he realized that he had you cock-whipped, the teachable moment evaporated. This lad is probably like most other boys with big dicks. They learn early on that their cock gives them enormous power, because it is the object of desire for so many. He soon discovered that you were no different than all the other men (and some women) in his life — only interested in owning a piece of his sizeable endowment. And so he turned the tables on you. You can hardly fault the guy. You try to manipulate him with your money. He outwits you and manipulates you with his johnson.
If you’re really serious about reining in the little monkey, you’d better come up with a clear, unambiguous message about what you will and will not tolerate. And it better be something more than “I expect you to bone my scrawny middle-aged ass on occasion.” Because, until you do, he will roam wherever and whenever he wants.
There are many root causes for his behavior, just like there are many root causes for your behavior. But since I’m talking to you, not him, I suggest that you get to the bottom of all of this by investing a good deal of time and energy with a competent sex-positive therapist. There’s one thing I can say for certain, if the status quo continues your resentment will boil over one day and there will be violence, the kind of violence that you may not think yourself capable of now. But violence there will be; you can bank on it!
Is there enough goodwill between the two of you to resolve this unfortunate situation amicably? Who knows! If I had to guess, I’d say there was a slim to no chance for that. If that’s the case, I advise you pack him up and put him on the next plane south. And no more relationships for you, particularly with unemployed young men with massive schlongs, till you get your head screwed on tighter.
Good Luck ya’ll
Hey sex fans,
It’s Black Friday; the day the holiday shopping madness starts in earnest. I know some of you live for this time of the year, so The Dr Dick Review Crew will do our part. This is Week 3 of this our Holiday Gift Giving Guide.
This week we will hear from Review Crew members: Denise, Jack & Karen and Gina & Kevin.
First up, our friends and neighbors (BC, Canada), the extraordinary women at Eros & Isis send a work of art.
Sweet Pea —— $68.00
Denise
I have the pleasure of introducing you to a luscious little playmate, Sweet Pea, from a fantastic new company in British Columbia, Canada, Eros & Isis. It’s such a rare find to discover a boutique adult products company. I am so over the cookie-cutter, mass-produced stuff made of dubious materials that floods the marketplace. How refreshing to discover a manufacturer with an environmental consciousness. Long live Eros & Isis!
Sweet Pea is a petite, 3.5” x 2.5”, bulbous headed vibe made of 100% platinum 
silicone. It’s completely safe and non-toxic, which includes the natural mineral pigment embedded into the silicone to achieve the antique look of their toys. It is meticulously sculpted, molded and cast by hand to appear as a turn of the century collectible. It really is unique. I haven’t seen its like anywhere else.
Sweet Pea features a removable one-speed bullet vibrator that can be replaced or upgraded to any bullet-style unit. The bullet come packed with batteries, I’m happy to report. So your first ride is on the house. You can use Sweet Pea externally, but I prefer it as a pussy plug. The sculpted base delivers delicious stimulation to my lips and clit. And it is so soft and comfortable I can wear for an extended time. Very nice!
There’s a bit of a secret to removing bullet vibe from the base for cleanup or when you need to change the batteries. Simply add a few drops of water-based lube between the vibe and the hole it’s in. Remember only water-based lube on a beautiful silicone toy like this. Work the lube around a little; apply pressure to the base of the toy above the vibe and PRESTO! The vibe pops out.
Sweet Pea is just one of the gorgeous Eros & Isis toys and each is available in Gold, Silver, and Jade. The silicone makes the toys easy to clean with soap and water. But it also can be sterilized in boiling water or in the dishwasher; sans the vibe, of course.
FULL REVIEW HERE
Next, we have another Good Vibrations Ambassador Review.
Smartballs Teneo UNO & DUO —— $34.00 & $44.00
Gina & Kevin
Kevin: “Smartballs Teneo are Fun Factory’s take on a very old idea, Ben Wa Balls. You know what those are, right? They are insertable balls that were invented hundreds of years ago, to enhance sexual stimulation and to exercise a woman’s PC muscles (pubococcygeus muscle). But since men have PC muscles too, I wanted to join in the fun. In other words, you do your Kegel exercises with these babies while they are inserted vaginally or, in my case, anally.”
Gina: “Smartballs are discreet. And as Kevin suggests, they are both pleasurable and therapeutic.”
Kevin: “Remember, the more Kegels you do, the more intense your orgasms are. And this is true for both women and men.”
Gina: “You simply insert the Smartballs Teneo UNO into your vagina.
Kevin: “Or the Smartballs Teneo DUO into your ass. Or the other way around.”
Gina: “Each Smartball unit has a finger groove for easy insertion and a tether that makes for easy removal. You’ll want to use some lube when inserting. And since these products are made of silicone, you can only use a water-based lube with them.”
Kevin: “Here’s the special part. Each Smartball has an inner ball that creates the a sweetest vibration sensation.”
Gina: “They aren’t as heavy a ball as I am used to, but they are comfortable to wear. And you can wear these for hours, if you’d like. Take them dancing, to the grocery or for a walk in the park. Every movement gives you pleasure while strengthening your PC muscles.”
Kevin: “They are extremely durable and easy to clean. You can sterilize them in boiling water or pop ‘em in the dishwasher, which makes the Smartballs Teneo shareable. You can also wipe them down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution. Or just use soap and warm water for a quick cleanup.”
Gina: “I like to masturbate with the Smartballs. My orgasms are more intense, because my vaginal muscles contract around the vibrating balls. Regular use can also help prevent stress incontinence.”
Kevin: “And I like to squeeze one off with a ball or two in my ass. They provide very pleasant prostate stimulation. And ya never have to change batteries or wait for a recharge.”
FULL REVIEW HERE
Finally, the last in our series of Tristan Taormino’s educational and enrichment videos.
Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide To Anal Pleasure For Men —— $29.95
Jack & Karen
Jack: “We’re back with another butt sex video. If you remember, last time we reviewed: The Expert Guide to Anal Sex. I was all bummed out because that video didn’t include men as the receiving partners in anal sex. How was I supposed to know that there was an entire video in this series that was all about pegging your guy?”
Karen: “Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide To Anal Pleasure For Men is just what we’ve been looking for.”
Jack: “The disc starts out with a tutorial on the subject of male anal stimulation and goes from the anatomy itself through the actual processes involved. And our favorite ass-mistress, Tristan Taormino, is the host of this portion of the film.”
Karen: “Then there are three sex scenes. The first involves Penny Flame and Devin. Tristan is there in an advisory role for the opening portion of the scene. Penny uses her fingers, a butt-plug, and a couple of strap-ons on Devin. This is the part that interested me the most.”
Jack: “Annie Cruz and Nomad are up next. She finger fucks her guy with up to four of them at once. DAMN! She also uses a bead-like butt-plug, an even large butt-plug, and a strap-on on him. Nomad fingers and fucks Annie’s ass with a glass dildo while she jills-off with vibrator. Very Hot!”
Karen: “I like the give and take between these two performers.”
Jack: “The third scene features Jandi Lin and Christian. Christian takes Jandi’s fingers, a metal butt-plug, a glass-like butt-plug and a, curved black prostate stimulator in his ass. Jandi rims him a bit, although not convincingly. Unfortunately there is no strap-on use here.”
Karen: “There was a bunch of stuff in this scene that I didn’t like. They had to do with exchanging bodily fluids, if you know what I mean. I agree with Jack, the connection between the two performers seemed a little contrived.”
Jack: “There are also tutorials in the bonus section. They include; Safer Sex, How to Choose & Wear A Strap-On, Solo Prostate Stimulation—involving the guys from the movie, and Anal Hygiene and Enemas—featuring the gals. This was just the stuff I had been looking for. Some may find the tutorials a bit dry, especially if you’re watching this for the porn value. But I think it’s important stuff to know, particularly for men, like me, who about to make the anal plunge.”
FULL REVIEW HERE
ENJOY
Hey sex fans,
Here we are at Week 2 of this year’s Holiday Gift Giving Guide. And we have two outstanding items for you. One will, no doubt, be familiar to you. The other is an outstanding example of erotic art.
The Dr Dick Review Crew Members: Kevin & Gina and Jack & Karen are here with the lowdown.
First, an old favorite from Vibratex.
Hitachi Magic Wand —— $39.95
Jack & Karen
Karen: “You’re not gonna believe this, but on our way home from Dr Dick’s, after picking up the Hitachi Magic Wand as our review assignment. Jack and I started to talk about the first time we’d ever seen a Hitachi. Neither one of us knew of the other’s history with the Wand till that moment. As it turned out, both of us had a similar introduction to this incredible vibe.”
Jack: So we were driving home and I said I had used a Hitachi Magic Wand
before. I told Karen that my mother had one when I was just a kid. I used to see my dad use it on his back from time to time. I never thought much of it till one day when I was home alone and had a little too much time on my hands. I couldn’t have been more than 12 years old at the time. I got the Hitachi from the cupboard, plugged it in and started running it all over my back, like I saw my dad do. I innocently slipped it between my legs. Holy shit, my little boy cock stood at attention till an almost painfully pleasurable thing happened only moments later. I came for the first time then and there. My skivvies were wet with something other than pee. I though I had hurt myself. I quickly put the Hitachi away and cleaned myself up; too afraid to tell anyone about the incident.”
Karen: “I have a similar story. My mother had a Hitachi too. She kept it in her bedside cabinet. I too was home alone one day; couldn’t have been more than 13; when I decided I’d see what this thing was all about. I remember watching TV and running the vibe all over my body. I put it to my cheek and it made my teeth rattle. I thought that was really funny. Absentmindedly, I ran it down over my chest. I had already developed boobs by that time. There was like electricity in my body that ran from my nipples to my crotch. I moved the Wand southward and BANG. I must have hit my clit through the jeans I was wearing. My knees buckled and the rest is history. I don’t think my mother ever knew how much I used her Hitachi. But let’s just say I nearly wore out the thing.”
Jack: “What more can we add to these stories. What does one say about an institution; a legend.”
Karen: “I wonder for the volumes that have been written about this, the granddaddy of all vibes, is it possible someone in our audience isn’t familiar with the Hitachi?”
Jack: “If there is actually someone out there who has been living under a rock for that past 20+ years, here’s the lowdown. The Hitachi is a very powerful 2-speed massager. It has a 2″ long by 2″ diameter padded, vinyl coated head, attached to a 9″ long heavy-duty plastic handle. And it is operated by electricity; so you have to plug it in. This is what makes it so damn powerful.”
Karen: “Absolutely, no other vibe, battery operated or rechargeable can even come close to the power of a Hitachi.”
Jack: “There’s nothing sleek or stylish about this thing. It’s pure function. I like to cradle it under my balls when I jerk off. I can feel the intense vibration all over my pelvis. It’s fantastic.”
Karen: “It’s loud too, but I don’t give a fuck. For as quickly as it gets me off, it could sound like Mack truck for all I care.”
Jack: “I can always tell when Karen is at her Hitachi. She always makes more noise then usual; and that’s saying something. Because this girl is a screamer.”
Karen: “I like to think of it as being expressive, not loud.”
Jack: “Whatever you call it it can wake the dead!”
Karen: “You do pretty good yourself, mister. When we want to terrorize the neighbors we both get out our Magic Wands, plug them in and go at it side by side. And I always get off first.”
Jack: “Never take a plug in toy like this near water.”
FULL REVIEW HERE
Next we have exquisite insertable erotic art from the artisans at XHale Glass. This is the second product we’ve reviewed from this outstanding company. Look for the Smooth Glider review.
The Heartbreaker —— $189.99
Kevin & Gina
Kevin: “What we saw first was this thick black velvet drawstring pouch. It is stately enough to carry the crown jewels.”
Gina: “And when we opened the pouch we saw the most magnificent textured glass insertable our eyes have ever seen. It is absolutely stunning. It stands 7” tall with a 1” diameter shaft. The tapered realistic looking head is only slightly larger. If that were all that was too it, it would be grand, but there’s more. The textures on the shaft
are heart-shaped and, depending on the light look ruby red or a deep purple. These hearts are actually 24K gold. Can you believe that? No wonder it comes nestled in its thick protective pouch.”
Kevin: “Before we dared use The Heartbreaker we set it on a little pedestal in front of the hearth and watched the flames in the fireplace behind it dance through the glass. It was so fuckin trippy!”
Gina: “I broke the spell by suggesting we take The Heartbreaker to bed. Kevin couldn’t resist the offer so we tossed a coin to see who would get first crack at it.”
Kevin: “Gina always wins these coin tosses; I don’t even know why we continue to go through the motions. At any rate, while she got ready in the bathroom I busied myself with getting two bowels of water ready; one with ice, the other hot water. Once Gina was ready, I blindfolded her with a silk scarf. I began kissing her all over, biting her nipples, eatin her cunt. Once she was wet I dipped The Heartbreaker into the ice water and touched it to her pussy lips.”
Gina: “I thought I was going to go through the ceiling. The cold hardness took my breath away. Kevin fucked me with The Heartbreaker while he masturbated. I still was blindfolded but I could tell what he was doing by his rocking motion.”
Kevin: “After Gina came a couple of times, I tried the hot water treatment. This wasn’t as startling as the cold, but it worked its magic too.”
Gina: “Once I had had my fill it was Kevin’s turn. He hadn’t cum yet, so he was totally primed for my assault with The Heartbreaker. I wiped down the toy with one of our toy wipes (it can also be sterilized) and slipped The Heartbreaker into my strap-on harness. The glass dildo has a nice base on it that makes it perfect for use with a harness.”
Kevin: “Gina lubed my ass with our favorite silicone lube; put a drop or two on The Heartbreaker; and before I could say ‘bugger’, she was in me. The dildo’s head hit my prostate with a bang. The slightly curved and textured shaft added the perfect sensations to my ass lips. I was leaking precum like a faucet.”
Gina: “I wouldn’t let him masturbate, but would rub his penis with my hand as I pegged him. He begged for release.”
Kevin: “She has a fuckin sadistic streak a mile long.”
Gina: “When I finally got him off with my hand The Heartbreaker was deep inside him. He came with such force I practically got knocked over.”
FULL REVIEW HERE
ENJOY
Hey sex fans!
As much as I hate to admit it, it’s that time of the year again. Today The Dr Dick Review Crew throws it into high gear to bring you our first installment of this year’s Holiday Gift Giving Guide. We want to get as many reviews out there in the next month as possible. We want you to have a load of swell holiday gift giving ideas, don’t cha know.
This week’s Review Crew includes: Joy & Dixie, Angie and Christa.
We start the day off right with two offerings from Doc Johnson.
Awesome Blossom —— $46.99
Joy & Dixie
Dixie: “We have a beauty for you this week. It’s called Awesome Blossom.”
Joy: “We are like totally getting into glass insertables. Six months ago we didn’t own a one. Now we do though.”
Dixie: “Yep, we are now the proud owners of three glass dildos. And they are 
spectacular. There is something about glass that really turns my crank.”
Joy: “Awesome Blossom is made of tempered glass. If you treat it with respect, as you would any fine adult toy, this thing will last a lifetime.”
Dixie: “Glass is so practical. There are no batteries to run down; nothing to recharge. It’s ready when you are.”
Joy: “Glass is nonporous and hypoallergenic, care and cleaning are a snap. For everyday cleanup a mild soap and water wash is fine. You can wipe it down with a 10% bleach solution. However, if you’re gonna share your Awesome Blossom or any other toy, sterilizing is recommended. Slip it into a pot of boiling water for a couple minutes and then it’s ready to go. Hey, ya can even pop this puppy in the dishwasher for a no fuss, no muss clean up.”
Dixie: “Exactly! And we’re all about sharing.”
Joy: “Oh, we should mention, for the sake of all our gay-boy friends, that Awesome Blossom makes a wonderful ass play toy too. You see it has a base on it that will keep it from popping into your pooper. The base also lets us use it in our harness. So there’s that!”
Dixie: “You can either chill or warm this beauty. And when it comes to lube; any lube will do. Regardless what kind of lube you choose, just know that a little goes a very long way.”
Joy: “In our rush to tell you all the features of glass, we have yet to describe Awesome Blossom. Atop the spiraled, clear-green shaft there is a clear teardrop shaped head. Inside the head is a three-dimensional image of a flower. The flower is a kind of wildflower, I would guess. The kind that blankets a meadow in the spring. It’s really sweet and lovely.”
Dixie: “The shaft is just over 1″ in diameter. The head is only a bit larger at about 1 1/4″ in diameter. The whole thing is just under 8” tall. There’s a bit of a curve to the shaft which make it perfect for G-spot (or P-spot) stimulation.
FULL REVIEW HERE
Next, Angie is up with the other Doc Johnson toy.
Alumination — Pink —— $29.90
Angie
Hello everyone! So glad to be with you again. I have the pleasure, both literally and figuratively, of introducing you to Alumination. It is my first metallic vibe and I like it very much.
It’s about as simple and straightforward a pleasure instrument as possible. It’s very slim and sleek; it’s made of aluminum; it’s waterproof; and it’s a 3-speed vibrator. It runs on two AAA-batteries (not included in the package). It’s not gonna knock your socks off in the power department, but it does get the job done.
One of the best features of an aluminum toy is that it is so heat sensitive. You can add additional sensations to the vibration by chilling and/or warming the toy. My favorite is chilling it by dipping it in a dish of ice water for a few moments. Oh MY!
It’s just 6″ long, maybe 3/4” in diameter. Like I said, slim and sleek. It’s very quiet too, which I really appreciate. Those of you who follow my reviews know that I love a waterproof vibe more than anything. Bath time is my time and my Alumination has been my companion for several weeks now. Only had to replace the batteries once. The battery compartment is easy to open and close, which is a huge plus in my book.
Aluminum is nonporous and hypoallergenic. Cleanup with mild soap and water; wipe it down with a 10% bleach solution or peroxide. You can even sterilize it in boiling water for a couple minutes.
FULL REVIEW HERE
Finally, the oh so charming Christa will tell us about her Synergy Erotic vibe.
Silicone Tsunami, Lavender —— $59.99
Christa
Wow, Dr Dick, you called on me to review a normal toy this time. What, you couldn’t find any freaky stuff for me? How odd!
Just kidding. I know I’m weird and all, but hey, I have my normal moments too. And the Tsunami is perfect for when I’m being my other self, the small town girl from Indiana.
So here’s the 411 on this amazing little vibe. It runs on 2 AA-batteries. Unfortunately, none came in the package. Hey you guys, some of us are starving students! Toss us a bone here and include some freakin’ batteries in your package, why don’t cha?
Anyhow, this sweetie is 100% silicone, which is like the only material that I’ll let near my precious pussy. I gotta have hypoallergenic or forget about it! I also sometime share my toys with my sub, butt-boy BF, Alex. He’s this total ass whore. I’m the first chick he ever had play with his prostate. Now it’s fuck me, fuck me, fuck me all the time. SHEESH!
You can share silicone toys because you can sterilize them. I can swish the Tsunami in boiling water for that purpose. I also wipe down my toys with a 10% bleach solution and a lint-free cloth between each use. But you can use peroxide or rubbing alcohol too. Warm water and mild soap is what I use if I’m gonna keep the toy all to my self.
The wicked thing about the Tsunami is that it has 10 fuckin’ vibration modes. That’s like crazy! I never had a toy with so many different vibrations. Luckily, it has an on/off button too, so you don’t have to run through all the modes to get to off. Much appreciate that!
FULL REVIEW HERE
ENJOY!
Caution: Amazing Sensations Ahead!
That’s right, sex fans, we have ourselves 4 fantastic and unique vibrators for review this week. And the Dr Dick Review Crew proclaims each one a winner. That’s amazing; when was the last time we could say that?
Ok, let’s get the ball rolling. We’ll be hearing from Review Crew members — Jack, Denise, Jada and yours truly, Dr Dick.
We begin today with a delightful prostate vibe, which comes to us from our friends (and neighbors in BC Canada) at Trinity Romance. Jack spills the beans.
Element —— $64.99
Jack:
Since I’ve started to show an interest in my ass as a reservoir of amazing sexual pleasure, I’ve become increasingly focused on finding just the right toy for my butt play. My partner, Karen, has loads of vibrating massagers, but none of them really interest me as an insertable. They are fine for external stimulation, but I’ve been on the lookout for something I can call my own and that I can safely stuff in my ass.
Because I’m so new to this sort of play, I have some very specific requirements for the toy of my prostate-massaging dreams. It has to be modestly sized, manly looking, something more plug-like then just a dildo and it has to vibrate. Is that too much to ask?
So along comes the opportunity to test drive Element, a prostate massager from one of the most 
trusted names in sex toys, Tantus. Curiously enough, I’ve seen pictures of this toy online. And ya know what, I passed it up thinking it couldn’t possibly be the toy I was looking for. For some reason, the photos I’ve seen of it make it look more menacing than it is. Once I had it in my hands, however, I realized this might very well be what I’ve been searching for.
It’s not nearly as big as I imagined it would be from the pictures I saw. It’s 100% silicone, which makes it soft and pliable. It’s got a manly enough shape; it’s more of a plug, then it is a dildo. And it sure enough vibrates. So check, check, check and check!
Karen said she thought Element would be as an effective G-spot vibe as it is a P-spot vibe. I suppose she’s right. But for now, this baby is all mine.
I greased up Element and my near-virginal pucker with a wad of water-based lube. (That’s the only kind of lube you can use with this, or any, silicone toy. But you know that already, huh?) I gingerly slipped the bulbous head into my ass. Pretty easy going! I stop to take some deep breaths, because Element is already working its magic. The shaft is easy to insert too. I’m kinda surprised. Not that it’s particularly thick; it’s just that it’s easy. Element comes to rest with the base tight against my cheeks. I’m lovin this big time, and I have yet to activate the vibe.
I wait a moment to let my hole adjust to its new friend. Then I switch on the bullet vibe that is embedded in the toy’s base. Wow, that’s nice! It’s not overpowering or anything, just a nice buzz. My prostate is jumpin’ for joy though. My dick is rock hard and drizzlin’ precum like crazy. I jack myself to nearly cuming then let go of my cock. I love this edge play; I can do this for a half hour easy. Element is amazingly comfortable in my ass. I would have never guessed had I not tried it myself.
I finally pop my joy-juice all over my chest. There’s more spunk then I usually produce. I’m chalking that up to the prostate massage. I love my Element!
If you’re a novice ass-diddler like me, and you think, like I thought, that this couldn’t be the ass toy you’ve been looking for; think again. It’s only 4.5″ x 1″ for chrissake. The bullet vibe runs on 3 watch batteries (LR44’s) and the first set is included in the package. THANK YOU Tantus!
FULL REVIEW HERE
Up next; yet another Big Teaze treasure! Jada will introduce you to this beauty. Did you somehow miss our earlier reviews? Look for them HERE!
Onyé —— $55.00
Jada:
I’m delighted to have this beautiful vibe to share with you. It’s one of the Big Teaze elegant B-3 line called, Onyé! I don’t know how to pronounce that, nor do I know what the word means. But they could have called it anything and it would still be the very stylish discreet vibe it is.
Onyé has eight separate massage modes (3 speeds and 5 pulse patterns). This little powerhouse is packed into a 4.5″ x 1.25” bullet made of gleaming black virgin ABS with a tasteful silicone band. The non-slip grip silicone band is perfect for keeping lubed fingers from slipping. All of this comes in sophisticated packaging including a satin-lined storage and brochure. You can tell that a lot of thought went into this presentation.
It’s splash proof, not waterproof. I wouldn’t use it in the bath, but it was fine in the shower.
The battery compartment is easy to open; thank you very much! It runs on 3-AAA batteries (not included in the package). Figuring out how the batteries are to be placed in the compartment was a bit of a puzzle till I noticed the tiny-tiny diagrams on the side of the compartment. I really needed my reading glasses for that.
There is just the one button operation on the base of the vibe, which means you have to cycle through all of the modes to locate the sensation best suited to your mood, or to turn it off. That might be aggravating to some, but it wasn’t an issue for me necessarily.
FULL REVIEW HERE
Now we have two vibes from a top of the line toy manufacturer, Vibratex. They are industry pioneers who bring a distinctive Japanese aesthetic to the marketplace. Denise starts us off with a cordless waterproof vibe.
Vibratex Mystic Wand —— $69.99
Denise
I keep saying; my Hitachi Magic Wand is my all time favorite toy! I ain’t about to give it up for nobody. You’ll have to pry it out of my cold dead hands. Got it? OK!
That being said, I have just discovered what I believe is the next best thing to my beloved Magic Wand. I present you with the Mystic Wand. It is the petite, cordless, waterproof sibling of the Magic Wand. And it shakes my word just like its bigger, older sister. It makes a perfect bath companion or a travel companion. It even comes with a sweet little storage bag.
It should come as no surprise to any of us that Vibratex is also responsible for introducing the Hitachi Magic Wand to the American market over twenty years ago. So hurray for that!
Mystic Wand uses of 4-AA batteries (not included in the package). The battery compartment is easy to open, but battery placement is very difficult to figure out. Only after I struggled with this puzzle for like 10 minutes, did I notice that there are miniscule images on the compartment that direct the user to the proper battery placement.
Like my trusty Magic Wand, this sweetheart of a vibe delivers amazing external stimulation. I’m not all that found of insertable vibes, so Mystic Wand is perfect for me. I love the ridges on its bulbous silicone head. A little water-based lube to get things started and before you can say; “whoa nelly!’ I’m on my way to big O-town.
The Mystic Wand features six vibe modes, each one more delicious then the previous one. And here’s something I really like; it has a separate on/off switch. I hate having to cycle through a whole set of functions just to turn the blasted thing off. Oh, and it’s surprisingly quiet; another big plus in my book.
The handle or base of the Mystic Wand is soft and silky. Is that silicone too? I wonder. Whatever it is, it is ideal material to use on the handle. It helps maintain a grip even with lubed fingers.
FULL REVIEW HERE
Finally, yours truly presents the other Vibratex vibe.
Pandora Vibrating Silicone Prostate Massager —— $39.00
Dr Dick
I’d like to introduce you to a handy little vibrating plug that’ll surely put a smile on your face. This unisex toy will jazz up whatever spot you got — G-spot or P-spot. Since I’m a proud owner of a P-Spot (prostate), I’ll do my testifyin’ from that particular pew. I’ll let all you G-spot owners come to your own conclusions.
This here Pandora massager is the perfect utensil for the novice butt pirate. Not overly familiar with things pokin’ you in the be-hind? Not to worry, this smooth ergonomic slim-jim will enter with ease. Guys who are used to having big toys in their hole will probably be unimpressed with this beginner’s model, but the rest of us will appreciate its modest size.
But hold on there, maybe you don’t know a butt plug from a hole in your head. Okey dokey, here’s the 411 on these puppies. Plugs are different from most dildos and other anal toys. They’re shorter and have a unique shape. The insertable part is tapered, designed for easy insertion and comfort while you got it in ya.
The plug tapers more dramatically near the base into a notch. This allows your sphincter muscle to close down on the plug keeping it firmly in place. Finally the flared base keeps it from slipping inside your bum. Pretty gal-darn clever, huh?
Anyhow, Pandora has everything you’d expect in a plug. Plus it has this swell hooked end that is designed to hit the spot, if ya catch my drift. And there’s a bonus; it vibrates too. Not all butt plugs do, ya know. There are seven, count them, seven different speeds and pulsations, which makes that little soft hooked end thingy do a happy dance on your P-spot. And boy if that don’t make you see the light, nothin’ will.
FULL REVIEW HERE
ENJOY
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