How the anti-gender movement is bringing us closer to authoritarianism

An all-gender restroom in San Francisco.

By Judith Butler

In the United States, gender has been considered a relatively ordinary term. We are asked to check a box on a form, and most of us do so without giving it too much thought. But some of us don’t like checking the box and think there should be either many more boxes or perhaps none at all. The myriad, continuing debates about gender show that no one approach to defining or understanding it reigns. It’s no longer a mundane box to be checked on official forms.

The anti-gender ideology movement, however, treats the range of sometimes conflicting ideas about gender as a monolith, frightening in its power and reach.

The fear of “gender” allows existing powers — states, churches, political movements — to frighten people to come back into their ranks, to accept censorship and to externalize their fear and hatred onto vulnerable communities. Those powers not only appeal to existing fears that many working people have about the future of their work or the sanctity of their family life but also incite those fears, insisting, as it were, that people conveniently identify gender as the true cause of their feelings of anxiety and trepidation about the world.

The project of restoring the world to a phantasmatic time before gender promises a return to a patriarchal dream order that only a strong state can restore. The shoring up of state powers, including the courts, implicates the anti-gender movement in a broader authoritarian, even fascist project. We see the rolling back of progressive legislation and the targeting of sexual and gender minorities as dangers to society, as exemplifying the most destructive force in the world, in order to strip them of their fundamental rights, protections and freedoms.

Consider the allegation that “gender” — whatever it is — puts children at risk through programs such as reading books with queer characters cast as examples of indoctrination or seduction. The fear of children being harmed, the fear that the family, or one’s own family, will be destroyed, that “man” will be dismantled, including the men and man that some of us are, that a new totalitarianism is descending upon us, are all fears that are felt quite deeply by those who have committed themselves to the eradication of “gender” — the word, the concept, the academic field and the various social movements it has come to signify.

The resulting authoritarian restrictions on freedom abound, whether through establishing LGBTQ+-free zones in Poland or strangling progressive educational curricula in Florida that address gender freedom and sexuality in sex education. But no matter how intently authoritarian forces attempt to restrict freedoms, the fact that the categories of women and men shift historically and contextually is undeniable. New gender formations are part of history and reality. Gender is, in reality, minimally the rubric under which we consider changes in the way that men, women and other such categories have been understood.

As an educator, I am inclined to say to these people, “Let’s read some key texts in gender studies together and see what gender does and does not mean and whether the caricature holds up.” Reading is a precondition of democratic life, keeping debate and disagreement grounded and productive.

Sadly, such a strategy rarely works.

A woman in Switzerland once came up to me after a talk I gave and said, “I pray for you.” I asked why. She explained that the Scripture says that God created man and woman and that I, through my books, had denied the Scripture. She added that male and female are natural and that nature was God’s creation. I pointed out that nature admits of complexity and that the Bible itself is open to some differing interpretations, and she scoffed. I then asked if she had read my work, and she replied, “No! I would never read such a book!” I realized that reading a book on gender would be, for her, trafficking with the devil. Her view resonates with the demand to take books on gender out of the classroom and the fear that those who read such books are contaminated by them or subject to an ideological inculcation, even though those who seek to restrict these books have typically never read them.

To refuse gender is, sadly, to refuse to encounter the complexity that one finds in contemporary life across the world. The anti-gender movement opposes thought itself as a danger to society — fertile soil for the horrid collaboration of fascist passions with authoritarian regimes.

We need to take a stand against the anti-gender movement in the name of breathing and living free from the fear of violence.

Transnational coalitions should gather and mobilize everyone the anti-gender ideology movement has targeted. The internecine fights within the field must become dynamic and productive conversations and confrontations, however difficult, within an expansive movement dedicated to equality and justice. Coalitions are never easy, but where conflicts cannot be resolved, movements can still move ahead together with an eye focused on the common sources of oppression.

Whether or not people are assigned a gender at birth or assume one in time, they can really love being the gender that they are and reject any effort to disturb that pleasure. They seek to strut and celebrate, express themselves and communicate the reality of who they are. No one should take away that joy, as long as those people do not insist that their joy is the only possible one. Importantly, however, many endure suffering, ambivalence and disorientation within existing categories, especially the one to which they were assigned at birth. They can be genderqueer or trans, or something else, and they are seeking to live life as the body that makes sense to them and lets life be livable, if not joyous. Whatever else gender means, it surely names for some a felt sense of the body, in its surfaces and depths, a lived sense of being a body in the world in this way.

As much as someone might want to clutch a single idea of what it is to be a woman or a man, the historical reality defeats that project and makes matters worse by insisting on genders that have all along exceeded the binary alternatives. How we live that complexity, and how we let others live, thus becomes of paramount importance.

There is still much to be understood about gender as a structural problem in society, as an identity, as a field of study, as an enigmatic and highly invested term that circulates in ways that inspire some and terrify others. We have to keep thinking about what we mean by it and what others mean when they find themselves up in arms about the term.

Complete Article HERE!

How to Explore Your Sexuality, according to Science

— Some researchers say that the standard definition of sexual orientation is incomplete—and offer a tool for expanding it.

By

Stacy Watnick: The first thing that I do with clients is I tell them that we’re going to go slow—because there are three things that most clients … do not talk about in therapy, and those are religion, politics and sex.

[CLIP: Intro music]

Kate Klein: There’s this, like, whole world underneath people’s clothing that no one talks about.

Sari van Anders: Our science, in some ways…, is…catching up with people’s existences.

Meghan McDonough: I’m Meghan McDonough, and you’re listening to Scientific American’s Science, Quickly. This is part one of a four-part Fascination on the science of pleasure. In this series, we’re asking what we can learn from those with marginalized experiences to get to the bottom of BDSM, find the female orgasm and illuminate asexuality. In this episode, we’ll discuss new ways to question your sexuality, according to science that draws from feminism and queer theory.

But first, let’s get real basic.

Stacy Watnick: Tell me, when I say the word sex or sexuality to you, what comes up?

McDonough: That’s Stacy Watnick, a clinical psychologist based in San Diego, California. She specializes in relationship issues and sexuality. She’s noticed certain patterns in her clients when she asks this question.

Watnick: First, surprise—that there’s such a range of experiences in their body and in their mind about it…. Frequently, I get some shame and discomfort. They’re not sure what words they’re supposed to use: “Are those bad words?”

A little lean forward…. they’re sort of excited and there’s some tension in wanting to tell me—or a little lean back because they’re not sure it’s safe.

McDonough: Stacy asks her clients if they’ve heard of gender and orientation. They talk about the words they know. And then she brings up the zine.

Zine is short for “magazine.” But zines are different from traditional magazines. They tend to be self-published and not typically what you’d find in an academic setting.

This particular zine invites readers on a “journey through the landscape of your sexuality.” The front cover features a drawing of five people on a path leading into the horizon. Each is holding a map labeled “SCT.” SCT stands for sexual configurations theory, a term coined by Sari van Anders, a gender, sex and sexuality researcher at Queen’s University in Ontario.

>Sari van Anders: I was doing some work about multipartnering and things like polyamory…, I was at a conference where there was … a session about asexuality…. And I started thinking about the way these two … identities claimed by different people might come together.

McDonough: Here’s Sari, the creator of this theory. She and her team created the zine as a more accessible offshoot of her 2015 academic paper on the topic.

Van Anders: It was the most exciting piece of work I’ve ever done. I’ve never really done work where it just felt like it had to come out, and it was sort of bubbling out of me.

I think we can maximize our pleasure when we understand what it is that we’re wanting, what the options are, who we are. We can think through some things that we might never have had prompts to do before.

McDonough: Oxford Languages defines sexual orientation as “a person’s identity in relation to the gender or genders to which they are typically attracted.” Sexual configurations theory asks: What if this sort of definition is incomplete?

Sari’s theory basically complicates the idea that sexual orientation is only based on gender. She built it on the existing academic literature and on what people shared about their sexualities.

Van Anders: And it was really important to me to include not just diverse sexualities and genders and people with diverse sexualities and genders but people with marginalized experiences, and so on …

McDonough: Such as people who are LGBTQ+, disabled, into kink or BDSM, asexual or non-monogamous.

Van Anders: Our science, in some ways, is, if anything, sort of, like, catching up with people’s existences…. I think many women know that, like, not all women who are attracted to men, maybe including themselves, that means they’re attracted to, like, penises or that’s the thing only that turns them on. And, and so there’s sort of an assumption that gender/sex sexuality, or what people typically call sexual orientation, is about, like, genital match-ups, like, “I have these genitals, and I’m attracted to people who have those genitals.” But really, like, we rarely see people’s genitals until we’ve already decided we’re attracted to them, right…. Usually there’s so much else going on.

McDonough: Sari uses the term “gender/sex” to mean features that are both socialized and biological and considers it to be just one aspect of sexual orientation.

>Van Anders: You know, it’s not always bodies; there’s also ways of being in the world or clothes, appearance, presentation, the way people talk, how someone treats you. And research on attraction is pretty clear that a lot of other things are rated pretty high up, like kindness or sense of humor or things like that.

McDonough: Sari refers to this as “sexual parameter n”—all the other things that make us attracted to a person.

The way she visualizes these aspects is through cone-shaped diagrams where people can pinpoint their preferences.

Aki Gormezano: As an example, you could think about the tornado for gender/sex sexuality…. So there’s a space on top where there’s a ring going around the outside that SCT calls the binary ring.

McDonough: This is Aki Gormezano, a sexuality researcher who did his Ph.D. with Sari at Queen’s. The ring he’s describing represents what most people know as the sexuality spectrum.

Gormezano: And then there’s a whole space beyond that, falling inside of the binary ring, completing that circle, where you’re not just thinking about women and men, you’re thinking about gender/sex-diverse folks who are occupying spaces outside of that binary ring.

McDonough: This is called the “challenge area.”

Gormezano: That circle I described is on the top, but then it moves all the way down to a point forming what kind of looks like a cone. And there’s a little meter ranging from zero to 100 on the far left of that, and that’s to indicate the strength of your attractions.

McDonough: In lay terms, if gender/sex was an important part of your attraction to people, you’d mark a place higher up on the tornado. If it wasn’t, you’d mark a place farther down. There are also tornadoes for partner number—one, multiple or none—as well as for sexual parametern, representing the other factors Sari mentioned, such as kindness and sense of humor.

Gormezano: Growing up, I was, like, pretty uncritical of my sexuality for the most part… Like I identified as straight by default. And a lot of my attractions, you know, as a cis boy at the time, or, like, now a cis man, were to cis women.

McDonough: In case you don’t know, “cis” here refers to cisgender, when a person’s gender identity matches their sex assigned at birth.

Gormezano: I had a point in high school where I realized … I did have attractions to people who were not cis girls or cis women…. I think I was just, like, confused and upset and didn’t really feel like it was something I could talk about. You know, especially as someone who played sports and was known as an athlete, where that was a big piece of my identity—like, I played soccer all the way through and still do…. I think, for me, the hardest part about realizing that I had interests and attractions that didn’t fit with being straight was that it challenged a lot of my identity around being a man or, like, wanting to be.

McDonough: Aki says that studying sexuality as an adult has helped him see that this isn’t a problem and that sexual orientation, identity and status don’t necessarily line up perfectly. Sexual configurations theory calls this “branched.”

Van Anders: Orientations have to do with, like, attractions, interests, arousals, desire [and] pleasure, and those might be different, or they might be the same. Like, you might really enjoy the thoughts or have fantasies about being with a man. And then when it comes to the actual sex you do, you find people of any gender are really enjoyable…. And status refers to, like, what you’re kind of actually doing, have done or will do…, who you’re actually with, for example.

McDonough: In a 27-country survey conducted by the market research company Ipsos in 2021, for example, 80 percent of self-identified heterosexual people reported that they were only attracted to the opposite sex, and 12 percent of them said they mostly were. Meanwhile 60 percent of self-identified lesbian and gay people said they were only attracted to the same sex, and 24 percent of them said they mostly were. These “branches” of sexuality can all be mapped on separate “tornado” diagrams. If you’re still struggling to picture them, you’re not alone. Between gender/sex, partner number, and other factors—plus identity, orientation and status—it’s a lot. But portraying sexuality as complex is also kind of the point.

McDonough (tape): To what extent do you think sexuality labels are limiting or expanding? If you could imagine your ideal world of how people conceive of sexuality, would everyone have a label?

Gormezano: I think when you just have identities and you just have labels, especially when identities and labels are really narrow…, you might not have the language to articulate the ways in which you don’t perfectly fit with that identity or label…. And I think the more people … who are able to understand the ways in which they might branch from their label or, like, perfectly coincide with it, the more open everyone will be around, you know, just like understanding that, like, around each identity is, like, a collection of people who might vary from that in different kinds of ways.

McDonough: Stacy, the therapist we heard from earlier, commonly meets clients who are working through their sexualities.

McDonough (tape): How do you help them kind of figure that out?

Watnick: We kind of try labels on like clothes…. I’m gonna try this sort of sweater on and see: Does that feel snuggly? Do I feel comfortable? Is there, like, a resonance in my body and in my mind and my heart and my genitals, all over me, that this feels true…? And much like the sweater I put on, I don’t have to wear it all the time…. There’s a very flexible return policy on this kind of content: if they decide they don’t want it; they don’t have to keep it. But we’re trying it on. Let’s see how it feels.

McDonough: Stacy first saw Sari speak at a virtual conference during the pandemic.

Watnick: And my whole brain lit up.

McDonough: The two of them have since formed a working group to bring sexual configurations theory into more clinical settings.

Van Anders: Those of us with marginalized or minoritized or oppressed genders, sexes or sexualities are often not given the tools from science or scholarship to make sense of ourselves. And so this can be helpful in that way. But also people who are majorities…, our culture tells everyone…, you’re just a cisgender man; that’s that; there’s nothing more complex; the complexity is for, you know, the other “complicated,” quote, unquote, people. But our research finds that the majorities actually have a lot of complexity and often have had even less prompt to think about it.

McDonough (tape): I’m wondering if you’ve had any pushback from the scientific community or otherwise?

Van Anders: We get a fair bit of skepticism from academics that what people might call laypeople, just you, people on the street, could actually do SCT diagrams because they are a bit more complex than “What is your attraction…?”…. So we sometimes get people who say, “This is pretty hard” or “I’m kind of confused.” And then we’re like, “Okay, can you describe yourself?” And then we look at the dot, and it matches. So people are actually able to do it anyway.

Van Anders: And we sometimes get pushback, too, from majorities who get, like, a little bit angry, who are like, “Okay, well, here, I can locate myself, but, like, I don’t believe in all these other locations….” You know, they’re usually seeing questions that have heterosexual first if there’s a checklist. And here it’s, like, you know, if you’re interested in women, that’s just one little dot in this whole diagram, and that can be a bit disorienting for people who are used to being with the center.

McDonough: Sari thinks that accounting for this complexity is not only helpful for individuals but also for future scientific research.

Van Anders: People sometimes forget that every measure we use is sort of telling a story about what the world is…. They’re kind of almost like a sieve that you sieve the world through. And depending on what that sieve looks like—whether it’s SCT, whether it’s a one-word question with a checkbox or answer or something—is going to let kind of different kinds of things through…. What is empirical in science is to try to measure the world as it is.

Complete Article HERE!

A Bird Sighting Just Reaffirmed That Nature Is Queer

— The half-male half-female Green Honeycreeper joins the ranks of genderqueer lionesses, the “Leaping Lesbian Lizard,” and other “drag queens in the sky.”

By Ananya Singh

Hamish Spencer, zoologist and Distinguished Professor at the University of Otago, was on holiday in Colombia when ornithologist John Murillo drew his attention to a striking bird at a bird-feeding station in a nature reserve. Save for a few feathers here and there, this Green Honeycreeper seemed to be neatly divided down its middle with brilliant blue plumage – resembling males of the species – on its right side, and green plumage – observed in females – on its left. The two watched this bird between the end of 2021 and mid-2023, observing its behavior in relation to other members of its species. As their report notes, this bird is only the second example of “bilateral gynandromorphism” in this species – a trait where animals present with both male and female characteristics in species that usually have distinct sexes.

This “extremely rare,” half-male and half-female bird soon made headlines. After all, it was the first record of this phenomenon in this species in over a 100 years. But this sighting also reiterated what some scientists have long been pointing to – that our understanding of sex as a biological binary of male and female may, in fact, be a simplistic reduction of a far more complex reality.

“Many birdwatchers could go their whole lives and not see a bilateral gynandromorph in any species of bird,” Spencer said in a statement. While considered rare, this trait has previously been observed in spiders, bees, butterflies, lizards, and stick insects among others. Scientists have also found these seemingly gender binary-defying individuals in other bird species, such as the northern cardinal (a non-binary icon, according to X) and the rose-breasted grosbeak. The northern cardinal even inspired Pattie Gonia, an environmental drag activist, to create a look based on it. “We see queerness and gender queerness demonstrated in birds like the [chimera] cardinal so vividly… Birds are drag queens in the sky,” Gonia told Audobon Magazine.

In its most simplistic form, sex in humans seems to hinge upon the presence or absence of the Y chromosome, which determines the reproductive organs one possesses. Sex, according to this understanding, casts individuals as either male or female and is one of the foundational pillars upon which our society has been constructed – prescribing roles, granting opportunities, and determining whose rights are championed and whose sidelined. But several scientists have pointed out that sex as a binary is false. Arthur Arnold, a biologist at the University of California, Los Angeles, told Scientific American in 2018, “The main problem with a strong dichotomy is that there are intermediate cases that push the limits and ask us to figure out exactly where the dividing line is between males and females… And that’s often a very difficult problem, because sex can be defined a number of ways.” That is, sex in humans (as in animals) is far more complex.

Agustín Fuentes, a professor of anthropology at Princeton University, pointed to emerging research data that shows how binary explanations of human sex “are either wholly incorrect or substantially incomplete.” Biology has been wielded as a tool to exclude queer people. Fuentes writes, “Given what we know about biology across animals and in humans, efforts to represent human sex as binary based solely on what gametes one produces are not about biology but are about trying to restrict who counts as a full human in society.”

Look to the natural world and countless examples emerge to challenge the fallacies around sex, gender and sexuality. These examples call into question what humans have long considered “natural.” It is an idea inherent in the field of queer ecology that draws upon the ecofeminist movement and expands it beyond binary thinking, instead championing a more fluid and diverse understanding of the world, and our relationship with it. Nature, as countless species show, is queer.

Take the clownfish, for instance. They live in groups where only two – the dominant male and female are mates. When the female dies, the male changes its sex to become female before selecting the next male from the group to become its mate. Male bearded dragons, meanwhile, reverse their sex under warm temperatures to become female while still within the egg. Banana slugs are “simultaneous hermaphrodites” – they possess and use both their male and female reproductive organs to mate with a partner or even themselves. In Botswana, five gender-queer lionesses alarmed scientists when they grew a mane and developed male-like behaviors, including a deeper roar and mounting other females. Then there is the New Mexico lizard, which is a species that entirely comprises females. They mate, lay eggs and reproduce like others. According to scientists, this is a form of asexual reproduction known as parthenogenesis. Just like the “non-binary” cardinal, this lizard – also referred to as “Leaping Lesbian Lizard,” also became a queer icon, inspiring not only art, but even a Pokémon and the name of a college frisbee team.

A key way in which nature challenges the heterosexual ideal is through the sheer prevalence of same-sex behavior. Homosexuality, reports say, has been documented in 1500 species – from dolphins and giraffes to penguins and starfish. It’s ironic when viewed historically, where the supposed absence of homosexuality in animals has been used time and again to fuel homophobia and deem homosexuality a “crime against nature” itself. The emperor penguin, for instance, was lauded by American conservatives as upholding traditional family values after a film depicted them in monogamous relationships. Penguins, however, may be socially monogamous, but aren’t so sexually, Eliot Schrefer, author of “Queer Ducks (and Other Animals): The Natural World of Animal Sexuality,” wrote in The Washington Post. Some may even be bisexual, Schrefer noted. Just last year, a pair of male penguins successfully fostered an egg at the Rosamund Gifford Zoo in New York, while in 2019, another pair of male penguins at the Berlin zoo co-parented an abandoned egg after having attempted to hatch stones and even a dead fish.

Same-sex behavior across species also challenges the prevailing notion that sex in the natural world only occurs for the goal of reproduction. Instead, there are many reasons for same-sex behavior – from building social bonds and resolving conflict to simply gaining pleasure. Recently, a lot more research has emerged on same-sex relationships in nature, perhaps due to changing gender norms. In the past, observations of same-sex behavior had scientists either decrying it as “depravity” or avoiding publishing findings, due to their own biases or to prevent disapproval from the scientific community, noted Schrefer.

As Ingrid Bååth wrote in Climate Culture, “Not only does our understanding of nature become the baseline for what we believe to be natural, but also what we believe to be moral or good behaviour… We interpret nature based on our inherent biases and use our biased understanding of nature to defend and justify those societal biases we have.”

These biases stem from predominantly Western notions of gender and sexuality that have been imposed upon the human and nonhuman worlds, Willow Defebaugh noted in Atmos. It creates dualities of “opposing” categories – pitting humans against nature, man against woman – separating one from the other in a power hierarchy. “Binary thinking, in any form, is rooted in a Western colonial view of the world in which one must always be subjugated by the other,” Katy Constantinides wrote for Climate Policy Lab.

A queer ecological framework, on the other hand, shows us that there is no one way to be masculine or feminine and that these categories may not exist in nature as we know it. It positions humans as a part of nature rather than distinct from it, leveling the power dynamics from an extractive to a community-oriented one. Nature is fluid, queer, and resists categorization as per human cultural perceptions and biases. As queer ecologists point out, acknowledging that may be the first step to repairing our relationship with the natural – as well as human – world.

Complete Article HERE!

The second step is learning

— Distinguishing gender identity and sexual orientation

The Gender Unicorn illustration explains the difference between sexual orientation and gender identity.

Sexual orientation and gender identity are hot topics that bring much controversy and misinformation with them, especially when it comes to youth. Dr. Cosio, Prince George physician, explains the difference.

By Christine Dalgleish

Sexual orientation and gender identity are hot topics that bring much controversy and misinformation with them, especially when it comes to young people.

A group of local healthcare providers and doctors, Physicians for Diversity & Inclusion, have come together to stand with families of gender diverse children and gender diverse members of the community.

Dr. Ingrid Cosio, whose practice includes time spent at the Northern Gender Clinic in Prince George each week, provides specialized care to transgender and gender diverse persons living in the Northern Health region.

Cosio referred to the www.transstudent.org online tool called The Gender Unicorn to explain basic terms used when it comes to explaining the difference between gender and sexuality.

“So gender identity is what’s in the brain, in the sense that this is how you feel on the inside – your gender,” Cosio said. “So there is female, male, other. So you can have some of one – it doesn’t mean you’re less of the other.”

Gender expression is how you are presenting yourself, which includes feminine, masculine or other.

“You can feel male even though you were assigned female at birth but not feel safe to express it in any way,” Cosio said. “Or you could fully express that by cutting your hair and doing things that are stereotypically considered more masculine. So that’s your expression piece and that’s what other people are going to see when they look at you. So that’s very different than what’s going on in your thoughts in your brain.”

Sex assigned at birth are your chromosomes and what parts you are born with, Cosio explained.

Who you are physically attracted to are totally separate from gender identity. Sometimes these are divided into physical attraction and emotional attraction.

“So you can have any combination, so that means if a person is gender diverse, it doesn’t mean they are gay and a lot of people make that mistake,” Cosio said.

Cosio often finds those who identify as gender diverse, where things aren’t put in boxes so much, are pan-sexual which means they are attracted to the person, no matter what gender they are or what parts they have.

“It’s really about the connection they make with a person,” Cosio said.

For reliable and accurate information about gender identity, visit the BC Children’s Hospital gender resource page.

Complete Article HERE!

FIND PART 1 OF THIS SERIES HERE!

The first step is talking: how kids can safely explore gender identity

— “Going to talk to your doc doesn’t mean you’re expecting to have a treatment or some sort of solution. It’s a start of the discussion.”

It’s important to know children and adolescents will explore their identity and it’s a normal part of growing up.

By Christine Dalgleish

It’s important to know children and adolescents will explore their identity and it’s a normal part of growing up.

It’s not just about gender identity exploration but also what values are held dear, what kind of person they would like to be and it’s important to create a safe space for that exploration to occur.

A group of local healthcare providers and doctors, Physicians for Diversity & Inclusion, have come together to stand with families of gender diverse children and gender diverse members of the community.

Dr. Ingrid Cosio, whose practice includes time spent at the Northern Gender Clinic in Prince George each week, provides specialized care to transgender and gender diverse persons living in the Northern Health region.

Cosio offers some guidance during those first steps taken toward getting more information for a child talking about their gender identity.

“Any time is an OK time to bring it up,” Cosio said. “Going to talk to your doc doesn’t mean you’re expecting to have a treatment or some sort of solution. It’s a start of the discussion. Just like it would be for anything a patient is struggling with or has questions about. The ideal is that your primary care home – whether that’s a family physician or nurse practitioner – offers a safe place that you can go and talk about some feelings you’re having and have a chat about that. Even knowing that’s the starting point is so important and knowing you can come back if things are getting more difficult or you just want to follow up and talk some more.”

Knowing that identity exploration is normal and having a safe space to do that at the doctor’s office, at home and at school is the most important thing, Cosio said.

“Creation of the safe space at the doctor’s office where a patient can come and talk about things is super important,” Cosio said. “That they have a place to come – because some may not have that safe space – if they are coming with their parents, hopefully that means that there is some support to go get some questions answered and talk about it – so hopefully that’s already there. But the message for that first visit is that identity exploration in childhood and adolescents is totally normal, whether it’s gender, sexuality, just figuring out what your core values are, what’s important to you and what kind of person you want to be. And same goes for things like ‘the gender people assume I am doesn’t seem to fit.’ To think about that, to talk about that, so that’s where the whole exploration piece – and for the family and the child to know – that this is normal and we can just take their lead and support them.”

Having that safe space at home and at school is critically important, Cosio added.

“That’s where they can do that exploration,” Cosio said. “They can, so to speak, try on identities that they feel fit them better and to know that they are going to be accepted and loved no matter where they end up and would continue throughout that process.”

Feeling supported and safe while exploring their identity is essential for good mental health, Cosio added.

Gathering information from a patient is an important part of the job for a healthcare provider.

“Just letting them tell their story and talk about their experience and not necessarily guiding that but just seeing the important things they bring up, what are the questions, what are the fears and what their context is – who is in the home, things they like to do, what are the real successes that make them feel awesome, and what are some of the challenges they have. So the experience and the context are the two key pieces of understanding what’s really going on for the young patient.”

Cosio added it’s also important to ask about when they started thinking about this, how it has been making them feel, if it’s affecting their day-to-day life and  has it affected their mood? Are there other more pressing concerns like depression, anxiety or thoughts of self-harm or suicide?

“We want to be screening for that because it can be super dangerous,” Cosio said. “And if we don’t ask the question, they might not bring it up. And we don’t want to miss the opportunity where we could put in a safety plan or be aware of how at risk they are. And also are there any hopes or expectations of how, as their primary care provider, we can help other than listening and providing support.”

Those are the issues a first visit to the family practitioner will address.

The Prince George Public Library, in partnership with the Northern Gender Clinic, provides excellent resources, including gender workbooks, and novels with gender diverse characters going through similar journeys.

For reliable and accurate information about gender identity, visit the BC Children’s Hospital gender resource page.

Complete Article HERE!

To Understand Sex

— We Need to Ask the Right Questions

The answer to the question of how many sexes exist differs depending on the context

By Charles Roseman, Cara Ocobock

Sex is one of the major cultural and political fault lines of our time. Legislation aimed at regulating who may participate in different arenas of society, including girls’ and women’s sports, is being passed with some regularity. These legislative efforts tend not only to conflate sex and gender but also to jumble up biological traits such as hormone levels with behavioral/performance features such as sprint speed or jump height. Disputes arise in part from confusion and disagreement over what is meant by “sex.”

Within academia, disagreements about sex recently came to a head when the American Anthropological Association (AAA), the world’s largest professional organization for anthropologists, and the Canadian Anthropology Society (CASCA) removed a panel discussion entitled “Let’s Talk about Sex Baby: Why Biological Sex Remains a Necessary Analytic Category in Anthropology” from their upcoming annual meeting. The panel was submitted for review and initially accepted in mid-July. It was then removed in late September, following concerns in the anthropological community that the panel conveyed antitransgender sentiment and decrepit ways of thinking about human variation.

Both among the general public and in academia, the core argument boils down to the question of how many sexes exist. The tricky thing is that the answer to this question differs depending on the context. One perfectly accurate response is: “To a first approximation, zero.” The vast majority of life-forms—including bacteria and archaea—do not reproduce sexually. But if the question concerned the number of animal sexes present in a given tide pool or backyard garden, the answer would need to account for organisms that switch sexes, sometimes mate with themselves or switch back and forth between sexual and asexual reproduction. When we ask, “How many sexes are there in humans?” we can confidently answer “two,” right? Many people think sex should be defined by a strict gamete binary in which a person’s sex is determined by whether their body produces or could produce eggs or sperm. But when you are out and about in the human social world, are you checking everyone’s gametes? And what of the substantial number of people who do not produce or carry gametes?

We think the ongoing discussion about sex might benefit from a fundamental change in approach by turning the question around such that we ask, “If ‘sex’ is the answer, what was the question?”

The value of this approach becomes clear when you consider the long-running debate in biology over how to define species. One definition, the biological species concept, posits that species are groups of actually or potentially interbreeding organisms capable of producing fertile offspring. It is not universally applicable because, as noted earlier, most organisms do not reproduce sexually. It does, however, provide a framework for asking questions about how sexually reproducing organisms can evolve ways to avoid mating with organisms distinct enough that their offspring’s survivability or fertility would be compromised. This framework has led to a bounty of work demonstrating that speciation in organisms living in the same area is rare and that physical separation among groups appears to be a key component of evolving reproductive barriers.

We can extend this “ask questions first” framework to concepts about sex. When it comes to sexually reproducing organisms, several classes of questions fit nicely into a binary view of sex. Others do not. 

Binaries are indispensable when asking evolutionary questions about many sexually reproducing organisms. Sometimes the questions asked rely on a strict binary because that is the nature of the relevant existing data—for instance, data from historical and contemporary demographic reports. We have to appeal to a multiplicity of binaries, however, because sexual reproduction has evolved many times and in many different ways across the living world. Reproductive capacities in birds and mammals largely involve inheritance of different combinations of sex chromosomes, whereas in many reptiles, sex is determined based on environmental cues such as temperature.

Binaries start to fail us once we move into questions about how organisms live out their lives. This can be seen in the example of transgender athletes. Arguments revolving around including or excluding trans athletes often rest on notions of strict binary differences in hormone type and concentration that associate female individuals with estrogen and male ones with testosterone. This assumes testosterone is at the root of athletic performance. These hormones do not hew to a strict binary, however. Female and male people need both estrogen and testosterone to function, and they overlap in their hormone concentrations. If we are interested in how estrogen and testosterone affect athletic performance, then we need to examine these respective hormone levels and how they correlate with athletic outcomes. We cannot rely on gross average differences between the sexes as evidence for differential athletic success. Adherence to a sex binary can lead us astray in this domain of inquiry.

Further problems arise when we compare humans to other species. Some organisms are incapable of reproducing. Some that are capable may end up not reproducing. Others may alternate between reproducing asexually and sexually, and still others may switch sexes. Such organisms provide fascinating insights into the diversity of life. But when we refer to clown fish changing sex to emphasize the diversity of ways in which sexual beings move through the world, we risk losing sight of the issues of consent, autonomy, well-being and self-determination that form the bedrock of all dimensions of human health, sexual or otherwise.

As scientists who study evolutionary genetics and human physiological responses to extreme environments, we have a strong interest in understanding the varied presentations of features that we think of as being related to sex. The questions we ask about sex in our research are different from those used in a health context, such as practicing gender-affirming care through erectile dysfunction medication or pubertal hormones. Scientists like us would do well to embrace intellectual humility and listen carefully before deciding that any one definition of sex is useful for understanding the living world.

So, if “sex” is the answer, what is the question? This is not so clear, and we have no warrant to make authoritative declarations on this issue from a scientific standpoint that is uninformed by ethical, moral or social considerations. We are in good company here because sex encompasses such a range of questions that we doubt any one medical, scientific or humanistic practitioner would be able to come up with a question that encompasses all of the ways in which humans are affected by sex, however it is construed.

Complete Article HERE!

What Does It Mean To Be Nonbinary?

— Being nonbinary means not identifying solely (or at all) with being male or female

For a long time, Western society thought of sex and gender as a binary: male/female, girl/boy, man/woman. Though plenty of people throughout history have likely identified otherwise, we haven’t had the language to talk about or understand what that means.

Fortunately, we’ve come a long way. In 2021, a study by the Trevor Project found that more than a quarter (26%) of LGBTQIA+ youth now identify as nonbinary, with an additional 20% saying they’re still questioning whether they’re nonbinary. And that data doesn’t even begin to cover nonbinary/questioning adults.

But what exactly does it mean to be nonbinary? Child and adolescent psychiatrist Jason Lambrese, MD, helps define this term so that you can better understand this gender identity.

What is nonbinary?

In simple terms, being nonbinary means that you do not identify (solely or at all) with the idea of being a man or a woman.

“We used to think that people were either male or female, and that was it — that there were two endpoints, and everyone had to be at one of them,” Dr. Lambrese says. “But it became clear that that didn’t fit everybody’s experience.”

Now, health professionals recognize that gender identity is much more expansive and multifaceted. Sometimes, it’s explained as a spectrum — a sliding scale of sorts, with “male” and “female” as endpoints.

For some people, being nonbinary means feeling that you’re somewhere else along that line — in between male and female, or a combination of some aspects of both. But other nonbinary people feel that their gender identity exists outside the male/female spectrum — not on the line but somewhere else altogether.

“There are a lot of cultures where it’s very common to identify as male, female or a third gender,” Dr. Lambrese notes. “We might put it somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, or it can be thought about completely outside of that construct.”

Nonbinary gender identities

If you’re trying to get a handle on what it means to be nonbinary, you’re going to have to get comfortable in gray space: There are no specific, hard-and-fast rules about nonbinary identities or “what it means” to be nonbinary.

“What it means for one person could be different than what it means for somebody else,” Dr. Lambrese states.

A nonbinary person could just identify with the term “nonbinary,” or they may use other terms to describe themselves and their relationship (or lack thereof) with gender:

  • Agender,genderless, or gender-free are terms for people who don’t identify with any gender at all.
  • Androgynousmeans having gender expression characteristics that are typically associated with both male and female.
  • Bigenderis when someone identifies with two genders, whether they experience those genders at the same time or alternately.
  • Demigirl and demiboyare terms for people who partially identify with one gender or the other, but not fully.
  • Genderfluid and genderflux refer to the feeling that your gender is flexible. It may change from day to day or over time.
  • Gender non-conforming usually means that a person doesn’t conform to societal gender norms, whether in terms of gender identity, gender expression or both.
  • Genderqueer is typically used as an umbrella term, sort of like nonbinary, for anyone who feels they don’t fit into standard gender labels.

Because gender can be such a personal experience, these terms can mean different things to different people. And some people might identify with multiple terms or with others not listed here.

If these terms are new to you, you might feel confused about some of the nuances and differences between them. That’s OK. The most important thing is to remain open-minded to learning what they mean to individual people and their gender identity — so that you can be as supportive as possible.

Is nonbinary the same as transgender?

Sometimes, and sometimes not. The answer to this question comes down to each individual person and what identity feels right to them.

For the most part, you can think of being transgender as an overarching concept that encompasses multiple types of identities. “You could say that being trans is the most overarching of all of the umbrella terms, and under that are smaller umbrellas, like being nonbinary,” Dr. Lambrese clarifies.

But not everyone who identifies as nonbinary will identify with being trans. Some nonbinary people, for example, may feel more comfortable with explanations like “not cisgender.”(Cisgender meaning people whose gender identity corresponds with what they were assigned at birth.)

“For some people, even the term ‘transgender’ can feel like a binary,” Dr. Lambrese says, “so being nonbinary may feel separate from the identity of transgender. It’s all very individualized.”

It’s always best not to make assumptions about anyone’s identity — which is, by the way, a good rule of thumb for all for life!

What pronouns do nonbinary people use?

This answer differs for every person, but “they/them” is common. The Trevor Project found that more than one-third of nonbinary youth exclusively (only) use the pronouns “they/them.”

For some people, using they/them to refer to a singular person feels weird and uncomfortable — that squiggly feeling you get when you use improper grammar. If this is you, try to remember: Language is constantly evolving, and it’s OK for words’ meanings to change. Plus, you’re probably already more used to using they/them singular pronouns than you might think (for example, “Someone left their umbrella behind! I sure hope they come back for it.”).

“It’s important that we validate and normalize ’they/them’ as pronouns that can be used singularly,” Dr. Lambrese states.

The study also found that an additional 21% of respondents use a combination of gender pronouns that include but aren’t limited to they/them. This could mean, for example, that someone uses them/them pronouns and she/her pronouns. They may prefer that you mix them up at random (“I’m getting lunch with her tomorrow because they weren’t available today.”) or ask that you use certain pronouns at certain times.

What about neopronouns?

Less common but still important are neopronouns, which are words that have been created to take the place of traditional pronouns. Some examples include:

  • Xe/xem/xir.
  • Ze/zir/zem.
  • Ee/em/eir.

If you’re not sure exactly how to use neopronouns, here’s an example: “Xe is so friendly and funny. When I first met xem last week, I immediately asked for xir number so we could hang out.”

It can take some work to incorporate this type of evolving language into your lexicon, but doing so shows respect and support for others. Like anything new, it will start to come naturally to you over time.

“If you mess up, that’s OK,” Dr. Lambrese reassures. “Just apologize and use the correct one going forward. People can usually appreciate that. It’s when you’re not trying that can be very hurtful.”

Nonbinary people and mental health

The English language now offers more terminology than ever for people to express their gender identity, which represents society’s evolving understanding of gender. But that doesn’t always mean that individual people have become more understanding or accepting.

The Trevor Project found that 42% of LGBTQ youth seriously considered attempting suicide in the year before the study. That included more than half of transgender and nonbinary youth — largely owing to a lack of support and respect from family, friends and society at large.

“When nonbinary teens live in an environment where they’re not feeling accepted or validated, they can experience negative mental health outcomes like depression, anxiety and even suicidal ideation,” Dr. Lambrese says.

The Trevor Project found that nonbinary youth whose family members respected their pronouns were far less likely to attempt suicide than their peers without family support.

“These numbers are supported by studies that have looked at sexual and gender minorities over time,” Dr. Lambrese says. “Data shows that the more support children and teens have, the better their mental health outcomes are.”

How to support nonbinary people

“Being affirming of somebody’s experience doesn’t have to mean that you fully understand all of the intricacies of their identity,” Dr. Lambrese says. “It doesn’t even have to mean that you agree with all of their goals for themselves. But you can still be affirming and supportive.”

Two of the simplest and more powerful ways to show your respect and support are to use people’s preferred names and proper pronouns.

“At the very least, this allows people to feel heard,” he says. “The data shows that sometimes, those simplest things lead nonbinary people to say, ‘When my pronouns are used correctly, I feel so much better.’ It’s such a simple, easy thing that we can all do.”

Dr. Lambrese shares some tips:

  • Ask for their pronouns (and share yours): Meeting someone new? “Don’t make assumptions about people’s gender identity or their pronouns,” Dr. Lambrese advises. “You can ask people, or you can introduce yourself with your own pronouns and ask for theirs. I might say, for example, ‘Hi, I’m Jason, and my pronouns are he/him. What name and pronouns do you use?’”
  • Seek out examples: If someone shares their pronouns with you and you’re not entirely sure how to use them, politely ask if they feel comfortable sharing some examples so that you can get it right. Google is your friend here, too.
  • When you mess up, apologize … and move on: If you accidentally misgender someone, acknowledge it (“Oh, I’m sorry! I meant ‘they.’”) and then keep the conversation flowing. Over-apologizing is awkward for everyone, and it centers your own feelings over theirs.
  • Normalize pronouns: Putting your own pronouns in your email signature or on your nametag at events allow people others to feel more comfortable sharing their pronouns with you.
  • Adapt your other language, too:Gendered terms like “Hey, ladies,” and “You guys,” can feel exclusionary to nonbinary people. Instead, practice using inclusive, gender-neutral terms like “y’all” and “folks.”
  • Gently correct others: If you overhear someone else talking about another person with the wrong pronouns, offer a polite but firm correction: “Jamie actually uses they/them pronouns, not he/him.” Helping others get it right behind the scenes may lessen the chances that they misgender someone face to face.

At the end of the day, supporting nonbinary people is, in so many ways, similar to supporting any other community of people: “Operate in good faith, demonstrate respect and apologize when you fall short,” Dr. Lambrese encourages.

Complete Article HERE!

Heterosexuality is often considered the “default” but that banner belongs to sexual fluidity

— There’s a difference between sexual orientation, sexual identity, and sexual behavior.

By Kelley Nele

“Something that the LGBT community always says is that your sexuality and identity can change at any time, but when it’s the other way around from gay to straight they get angry and say that it can’t.”

The former quote is a comment that was left on a CBN News video covering the Matthew Grech case. Matthew Grech is Christian charity worker who claims to have left his “homosexual lifestyle” for Jesus Christ.

Grech is currently facing criminal charges for allegedly promoting conversion therapy practices in Malta during an online interview.

Conservatives are outraged by the supposed hypocrisy of queer folks surrounding sexuality, but is it really hypocritical?

Why is it that LGBTQ+ people believe sexuality and gender identity are fluid yet also say a gay person cannot “turn” straight? Well, first of all, some LGBTQ+ people, even some who identify as gay, are in fact fluid and do sometimes engage in relationships with people of the opposite sex.

Since the beginning of time, heterosexuality has been viewed and promoted as the default. This is a product of the Christian patriarchal values many societies live by.

Despite these values and all of the conditioning they come with, there has been plenty of evidence—throughout history—suggesting that it’s not true.

If anything, sexuality is fluid for all genders and orientations. We’re conditioned to believe that you’re either straight or gay; if you’re not one, you’re the other. But, this is far from the truth.

In the book Not Gay: Sex Between Straight White Men Jane Ward shares insights about the various reasons why straight-identifying men engage in homosexual behavior.

But how is it possible for someone straight to engage in homosexual behavior and not be gay? Well, there’s a difference between sexual orientation, sexual identity, and sexual behavior.

Sexual orientation is defined as the quantity and duration of one’s same-sex or opposite-sex desires, often believed to be hardwired.

Sexual identity, on the other hand, is defined as how one identifies oneself; straight, gay, bisexual, etc.

And finally, sexual behavior is defined as the actual behavior one engages in.

The distinction between sexual orientation, sexual identity, and sexual behavior are what make it possible for people’s extracurricular activities to deviate from their disclosed or perceived orientation.

For decades, institutions like the army, prison and fraternities have manufactured circumstances where straight-identifying men are not only encouraged but sometimes forced to engage in behaviors that could be labeled as homosexual.

For fraternity boys, this means engaging in traditions such as the elephant walk or participating in a game of ookie cookie. In the Navy we see rituals of all kind including simulated oral and anal sex. And of course in prison, we see men have sex with other men due to the lack of access to women.

The reason why the straight-identifying men who engage in the aforementioned homosexual behavior aren’t considered gay is because the encounter(s) are either situational or seen as patriotic rituals that promote male bonding and/or character-building.

This makes it abundantly clear that straight-identifying men are capable of engaging in homosexual behavior — proving their fluidity.

It’s important to note that straight-identifying men don’t simply engage in homosexual sexual behavior because they are required to, they also engage in it because they want to.

In the 1940s, Dr. Alfred Kinsey created what we know today as The Kinsey Scale. Dr. Kinsey claims that sexuality exists on a spectrum ranging from 0 to 6; 0. exclusively heterosexual, 1. predominately heterosexual but slightly inclined to homosexual behavior, 2. predominately heterosexual but more than slightly inclined to homosexual behavior, 3. bisexual, 4. predominantly homosexual but more than slightly inclined to heterosexual behavior, 5. predominantly homosexual but slightly inclined to heterosexual behavior, and 6. exclusively homosexual.

The Kinsey Scale explains why straight-identifying folk can have sexual encounters with members of the same sex and remain straight, and vice versa.

Contrary to popular belief, straight-identifying men are not immune to the accidental hook-up with a member of the same sex.

For some, the accidental hook-up may open the door to further exploration and perhaps later the expansion of their sexuality. But, for others, the accidental hook-up is simply a one-and-done.

Homosocial homosexuality refers to men’s need for access to quick and emotionless sex and their longing for physical intimacy with other men. This manifests, for example, as men engaging in mutual masturbation while watching porn.

In addition to that, similar to cisgender heterosexual women, straight-identifying men often engage in homosexual acts like kissing (or more) simply for female attention or pleasure.

Engaging in sexual behavior for ritualistic purposes, attention or pure desire demonstrates the inherent fluidity of straight-identifying men’s sexuality.

Behavior that goes against the grain of one’s sexual orientation isn’t just limited to straight-identifying folk. Queer men are capable of demonstrating fluidity as well.

The term Down Low — which is most popular amongst the Black and Latino community, as well as the queer community — is often used to describe men who live “heterosexual lives” but have sex with men (MSM).

DL men are often queer men who not only present in a hyper masculine fashion, but also cling to a heterosexual identity for the status and protection it provides them.

Several kings, like Emperor Hadrian of Rome, would take wives while also having male concubines. Were these men polyamorous bisexuals or were they simply closeted gay men? No one knows for sure.

Some DL men retain their title, while for others, DL is simply a pit-stop before they fully embrace their queer identity.

Gay men have also expressed engaging in playful kissing with women whilst under the influence, fantasizing about being with a woman, or even going as far as experimenting with a woman.

This can occur more than once, and the events may be separated by years if not decades. And much like straight men, many gay men who have these experiences remain just that – gay.

Unlike straight-identifying men, gay men don’t choose to remain gay because of the status and protection it provides them. There is no status and protection reserved for queer folk. They remain gay because that’s who they are.

Gay men can expand their sexuality to include infrequent attraction or intimacy with women—that is to say, identify as homoflexible—but they cannot unsubscribe from homosexuality.

As for cisgender women, society doesn’t care all that much about their orientation or behavior. Cisgender women have for the most part had the luxury to be as fluid as they like without much scrutiny.

Sexual fluidity, of course, isn’t just exclusive to cisgender folk. As a predominantly heterosexual trans woman, I have experienced attraction to women and explored this desire too.

It is absolutely possible for someone to experience different sorts of desires at different points in their lives—but a gay person is not going to lose all inherent attraction they have to folks of the same sex or gender, just like a straight person who may be a little bit fluid isn’t going to lose their attraction to the opposite sex.

If one’s own natural desire for exploration can’t change one’s sexuality, it should go without saying that religion and conversion therapy can’t either.

Maybe, just maybe, this is because straight isn’t the default we have been conditioned to believe it is. Maybe the true default is sexual fluidity.

Complete Article HERE!

Understanding the Transgender Portion of Our Population

— Trans people make up approximately 1–2% of the population, though this could change in the future.

By Soren Hodshire

Transgender people are more common than you might think. Being transgender is not a trend, and it’s not new. Trans people have existed throughout history and will continue to be an important part of our society.
>But depending on where you live, you might not meet many openly transgender individuals in your day-to-day life. So, let’s take a closer look at this vibrant community!

According to this 2022 report from UCLA’s School of Law Williams Institute, 1.6 million people ages 13 years and up identify as transgender in the United States. This means that approximately 1.4% of the U.S. population is transgender!

Some research also shows that this number is growing, as around 5% of young adults identify as transgender. They found that the community further breaks down as follows:

As far as the world population goes, the country’s statistics for the number of trans people can range anywhere from 0.6–3%. The highest numbers of trans people are reported in countries Germany and Sweden.

Why does it seem like there are more trans people nowadays?

When we see the growing representation of trans people in social and mainstream media, it’s important to remember that people will feel more comfortable living openly and freely when there’s a more supportive environment, more resources, and less criminalization for being themselves.

As societal support grows and discrimination decreases, it’s likely we’ll see the reported number of transgender people rise until its natural level is revealed. Far from being a sign of indoctrination, this is a sign of a healthy society that we’ve seen in other areas before.

One popular example of this has been coined the “Left Handed Argument.” In the past, left-handedness was treated as a “sin” and highly stigmatized within society. Those who were naturally left-handed were encouraged or forced to use their right hand dominantly. This discrimination often found its way into our language and religious beliefs as well.

When society no longer believed that being left-handed was the work of “the devil” and stopped training everyone at school to use their right hand in the mid-20th century, for many decades we saw the reported number of left-handed people grow.

Now in the 21st century, the reports have leveled off and we know that about 10% of the population is naturally left-handed. It’s likely that we’ll see similar patterns as we learn the natural level of the transgender population in an accepting society.

How common is it to detransistion?

According to this comprehensive study from LGBTQ HealthTrusted Source, 13.1% of currently identified transgender people have detransitioned at some point. However, 82.5% of those who have detransitioned list their reason for doing so as external factors such as pressure from family, non-affirming school environments, and increased vulnerability to violence (including sexual assault).

These statistics are confirmed by Fenway Health. Their participants reported the following reasons for detransitioning:

  • pressure from a parent (35.5%)
  • pressure from their community or societal stigma (32.5%)
  • trouble finding a job (26.8%)
  • fluctuations in their gender identity or desire (10.4%)
  • pressure from medical health professionals (5.6%)
  • pressure from religious leaders (5.3%)
  • doubts about their gender identity (2.4%)

So, it’s not entirely uncommon to detransition but there are many reasons why people might choose to do so, especially due to dangerous and unforgiving environments. This doesn’t necessarily mean that these people stop feeling gender dysphoria, but they aren’t in the right space to transition (socially, medically, or legally) at the time.

Continuing your education

You might be asking yourself, “But what does ‘trans’ really mean?” Or even, “Am I transgender?” This is a nuanced and complex topic, and it’s natural to have lots of questions. Here are some resources that can help you find answers:

Takeaway

Being transgender isn’t that uncommon anymore. 1.6 million people (1–2%) in the U.S. identify as transgender. Worldwide current numbers range between 0.6–3%. Reported numbers are proportionally higher in young people and may continue to grow in the years to come.

With more of the transgender population coming out, it’s pertinent that the medical care and social stigma in society should improve. This stigma hurts the physical and mental health of trans people and can lead to people detransitioning because of harsh and unsupportive environments.

There have been many anti-trans sentiments and bills in the U.S. lately, but many health professionals and child welfare organizations oppose the anti-LGBTQ bills, specifically those that target trans youth. This Pride Month, June 2023, it’s more important than ever to support and celebrate gender diversity in your life and all year long.

Complete Article HERE!

What Is Gender-Affirming Care?

By Mira Miller

  • Gender-affirming generally refers to the medical, psychological, and social support provided to individuals who are transgender, non-binary, or gender expansive. to help align their gender identity with their outward appearance and improve their overall well-being.
  • This type of care can include socially transitioning by changing one’s name, pronouns or way of presenting; puberty blockers; gender-affirming hormone therapy; and gender-affirming surgeries.
  • At least 30 states have introduced or are considering laws that restrict access to gender-affirming care.

Gender-affirming care has been the subject of much debate in legislatures around the country in recent months, leading to countless misconceptions and myths about what it actually entails and who it’s for.< According to a report from The Williams Institute, 30 states had introduced or were considering laws to restrict access to gender-affirming care as of March 2023. The result is 146,300 transgender youth who have lost or are at risk of losing access to gender-affirming care. Several bans proposed in 2023 would also limit access to care for those up to age 26.

While misinformation on the subject abounds, it’s important to get the facts straight: Gender-affirming care is considered safe, effective, and medically necessary by the American Medical Association, the American Academy of Pediatrics, and the Endocrine Society.

“Gender-affirming care is considered life-saving,” said Rebecca Minor, MSW, LICSW, a gender specialist and therapist who provides gender-affirming care. “It plays a crucial role in improving the mental health, well-being, and overall quality of life for transgender, non-binary, and gender diverse individuals.”

What Does Gender-Affirming Care Involve?

Gender-affirming care refers to medical, psychological, and social support provided to individuals who are transgender, non-binary, or gender expansive, Minor explained. The goal of gender-affirming care is to assist individuals in aligning their sense of self with their outward appearance and to improve their overall well-being.

“Gender-affirming care means different things for different people,” Uri Belkind, MD, a pediatric medicine specialist who works in adolescent medicine at the New York-based LGBTQ+ health center Callen-Lorde, told Verywell. “It is not a specific process, but rather a collection of tools from which we can select to better fit the individual’s goals and needs.”

One aspect of gender-affirming care requires no medical intervention but instead involves transitioning socially. This may include changing one’s name and pronouns, and dressing or presenting in a way that affirms their gender identity, according to Sean Arayasirikul, PhD, an associate professor in residence of health, society, and behavior at the University of California, Irvine.

Beyond socially transitioning, there are three general medical options available when it comes to gender-affirming care, Belkind said, adding that some people may want or need all of them, while some may find happiness and well-being with only some. These include puberty blockers, gender-affirming hormone therapy, and gender-affirming procedures.

Puberty blockers are for younger patients who are entering puberty and are finding the changes their bodies are going through to be distressing. To access this kind of care, these patients must have shown insistent, persistent, and consistent identification with a gender that is different than their sex assigned at birth.

“This allows us to temporarily ‘pause’ these changes while the young person, with support from their family, further explores their needs and gains a better understanding of what is possible, medically speaking, and what it entails,” Belkind said.

Gender-affirming hormone therapy, on the other hand, refers to the process of using either estrogen or testosterone to promote certain physical changes and to inhibit others, Belkind said.

Gender-affirming procedures, both surgical and non-surgical, change certain physical characteristics that may not otherwise be modified with the use of hormone therapy. Belkind said these may include chest masculinization, facial feminization, permanent hair removal or hair grafting, and genital surgeries such as vaginoplasty or phalloplasty.

“One common misconception is that gender-affirming procedures are regulated only for trans and gender expansive people and that these procedures are experimental, lacking solid medical evidence,” Arayasirikul said.

In reality, cisgender people—or people who are not trans—also choose to undergo gender-affirming procedures to affirm their identity, Arayasirikul explained. This may include a breast augmentation, a mastectomy for gynecomastia, a hair transplant, a rhinoplasty, liposuction, facial fillers, or hormone therapy.

“These procedures and so many more are part of the health care of cisgender people,” Arayasirikul said. “Yet this same care is actively being criminalized for trans and gender-expansive people solely because they are different.”

Can People of All Ages Receive Gender-Affirming Care?

In states where gender-affirming care is not criminalized, trans youth can access puberty blockers to delay the onset of puberty and cross-sex hormones to develop their bodies in ways that align with their gender identity.

“Typically, gender-affirming surgeries are utilized by adults, not children,” Arayasirikul said.

And yet, much of the uproar surrounding gender-affirming care in the U.S. has been surrounding the subject of children undergoing surgery.

According to Belkind, some patients choose to start puberty blockers once puberty begins, while other patients may only begin to seek medical advice after puberty or much later into adulthood.

“It is important to note that, for children who strongly identify with a gender identity that is different from their sex assigned at birth, there are no medical interventions needed before puberty begins and only then do we consider the use of puberty blockers, if needed,” Belkind said.

Medical interventions always happen after a thorough evaluation of the patient’s needs, Belkind added.

Why Gender-Affirming Care Is Necessary

Gender-affirming care helps to reduce gender dysphoria, which is the distress an individual may experience when their gender identity does not align with their assigned sex at birth, Minor said.< “Gender-affirming care, such as hormone therapy or gender-affirming surgeries, can help alleviate gender dysphoria by allowing individuals to align their physical appearance with their gender identity” she said. “This reduction in distress and discomfort can have a significant positive impact on mental health and overall well-being.” Trans and gender-diverse individuals often face higher rates of mental health challenges, including depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation.1 Gender-affirming care, combined with mental health support, can help reduce these risks by providing individuals with the tools, resources, and interventions needed to alleviate distress and promote a positive self-image, Minor said.

According to one recent study, providing trans and non-binary youths aged 13 to 20 years with gender-affirming care, including puberty blockers and gender-affirming hormones, lowered their risk of developing moderate or severe depression by 60% and lowered suicidality by 73% over a 12-month follow-up.2

Another study found that gender-affirming surgeries were associated with a 42% reduction in psychological distress and a 44% reduction in suicidal ideation when compared with transgender and gender-diverse people who had not had gender-affirming surgery but wanted it.3

“Gender-affirming care allows individuals to express their gender identity authentically, promoting self-acceptance and improved self-esteem,” Minor said. “By aligning their physical appearance, social interactions, and personal identity, individuals can develop a stronger sense of identity and self-worth, leading to improved mental health outcomes.”

Additionally, gender-affirming care often includes support groups, peer networks, and counseling services that provide a safe and inclusive environment for individuals to connect, share experiences, and receive emotional support, Minor said. These social support systems, she said, are critical in combating feelings of isolation and promoting healthy relationships.

This kind of care can help combat the societal discrimination, stigma, and marginalization transgender and gender-diverse individuals often face. Minor said gender-affirming care can empower individuals to assert their rights, advocate for themselves, and challenge discriminatory practices.

“By affirming their gender identity, individuals can experience improved resilience, reduced psychological distress, and increased social acceptance,” she said.

Complete Article HERE!

Everything to Know About Gender-Neutral Terms and How to Use Them

— “Gender-neutral language is honestly an easy way to show respect and acceptance to everyone we come into contact with.”

By Jamie Ballard

The language we use when we’re speaking to and about people is significant. It can impact how we see others, how we see ourselves, and how people are treated in workplaces, social settings, classrooms, places of worship, and just about everywhere else. As we strive for a more inclusive world, one small thing you can do is to try practicing gender-neutral language and using gender-neutral terms.

“Gender-neutral language in and of itself is not a new concept, it has just become more of a topic of conversation as we strive to be more inclusive and accepting of all populations,” explains Jillian Amodio, social worker and founder of Moms for Mental Health.

To use gender-neutral terms is to recognize that “society has a way of gendering just about everything,” as Amodio puts it, and to find alternative ways to say or write things. For example, instead of addressing a group of people as “ladies and gentlemen,” you might try saying “everyone,” “colleagues,” “attendees,” “students,” or another term that makes sense in the context. One big reason for doing this is to ensure that non-binary or gender nonconforming people are recognized and included. You might be familiar with the idea of sharing your pronouns, and using gender neutral terms is another way to be inclusive.

Gender-neutral language can be beneficial for everyone, regardless of how they identify. Here’s everything to know about gender-neutral language and how you can incorporate it in your daily life.

gender spectrum collection using gender neutral language
Using gender neutral language is one way to ensure that everyone feels respected.

What are some examples of gendered language and some gender-neutral alternatives?

“Given that our society has for so long been built on gender norms and stereotypes, the division by gender has become ingrained in many aspects of daily living,” notes Amodio. You might find yourself assuming that a teacher, nurse, or daycare provider is female and a mechanic or construction worker is male. But obviously, that’s not always the case. One reason we might associate certain jobs as being “male” is because they often end with “-man,” such as “fireman,” “postman,” “congressman” and so forth. Instead, you could use descriptors that don’t assume gender, such as “firefighter,” “postal worker” or “mail carrier,” and “congressperson” or “member of Congress,” for example.

“When referencing someone or a group of people just ask yourself if there are words you can replace to be more inclusive,” Amodio explains.

Beyond job titles, there are other commonly-used phrases that tend to make assumptions about gender. Here are a few examples, along with gender-neutral terms you could use instead.

  • Boys and girls — instead, consider using children, kiddos, or everyone
  • Ladies and gentlemen — instead, consider using folks, everyone, students, or colleagues
  • Councilman/Councilwoman — instead, consider using councilperson
  • Husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend — instead, consider using partner, significant other, or spouse
  • Mother or father — instead, consider using parent
  • Niece or nephew — instead, consider using nibling
  • Man-made — instead, consider using artificial or machine-made
  • Pregnant woman or mother-to-be — instead consider pregnant person, expectant person, or birthing parent
  • Freshman — instead consider first-year student

To be clear, it’s not necessarily insensitive to use a gendered phrase that you feel applies to you, such as “I’m a mother of two” or “My wife and I liked that movie.” However, when you’re speaking to others, particularly in a group, it’s more inclusive to use gender-neutral phrasing like “parents” or “partners” since it doesn’t assume anyone else’s gender identity or sexuality. Plus, using gender-neutral language in reference to yourself and others can also be a way to signify that you are supportive and respectful of all identities.

Why is it important to use gender-neutral language?

“By using gender neutral language we are also not assuming that we know someone’s identity,” says Amodio. “The terms which people use to express their gender and gender identity can vary based on personal preference and what feels right to each individual. Some people are not ‘out’ publicly in terms of how they identify, and gender-neutral language is honestly an easy way to show respect and acceptance to everyone we come into contact with.”

She also notes that in some situations — such as a teacher addressing a new group of students or an employee speaking at a conference or meeting — you may not know the people you’re communicating with. In these cases, “gender-neutral language would be the best option by default,” Amodio says.

gender spectrum collection using gender neutral language
You may not always know the gender of who you are communicating with, so gender-neutral language can be the best option.

Should I say something when I hear other people using gendered language?

“We don’t have to be the language police, but if someone uses the wrong pronouns, a gentle correction is perfectly fine,” Amodio says. “If colleagues are addressing people in gendered terms, perhaps suggesting neutral terminology will be of benefit.”

What are some other ways I can support people who have diverse gender identities?

In addition to being thoughtful about the way you speak and write, there are plenty of meaningful ways you can support people who are non-binary, gender nonconforming, or have other gender identities. You can donate to organizations advocating for LGBTQ+ rights, such as The Trevor Project or the Human Rights Campaign. You can also make it a point to shop at businesses owned by LGBTQ+ people and at businesses that donate a certain amount of their profits to LGBTQ+ advocacy organizations. You can also look to local LGBTQ+ organizations and activists in your community and support them by donating, volunteering, spreading the word about their work on your own social media, or finding another way to get involved.

Lastly, don’t underestimate the impact of your words. Using gender-neutral language, sharing your pronouns in a work meeting, and being vocal about your support of LGBTQ+ people are all ways that you can be supportive.

Complete Article HERE!

To understand biological sex, look at the brain, not the body

By Jennifer Finney Boylan

There they are, in their Chevrolet Colorado, five dudes bouncing up and down as the truck grinds through the rugged American high country. Two guys up front, three in the back. Shania Twain is blasting. The fellow in the middle is singing along. “Oh, I want to be free, yeah, to feel the way I feel. Man, I feel like a woman!”

The other guys look deeply worried. But the person in the back just keeps happily singing away, even as the dude next to him moves his leg away. Just to be on the safe side.

This commercial aired back in 2004, and even now it’s not clear to me if it’s offensive or empowering, hilarious or infuriating. Twain says she wrote “Man! I Feel Like a Woman” after working at a resort where some drag queens were performing. “That song started with the title,” she said. “Then it kind of wrote itself.”

It’s a fun tune, and I admit I kind of loved seeing that commercial. But at its heart is an issue central to our current political moment.

When someone says they feel like a woman, what exactly does that mean?

Across the country, conservatives are insisting that — and legislating as if — “feeling” like a woman, or a man, is irrelevant. What matters most, they say, is the immutable truth of biology. Missouri’s attorney general, Andrew Bailey, wants to restrict gender-affirming health care for all transgender people, including adults. A new dress code at the Texas Agriculture Department commands that employees wear clothing “in a manner consistent with their biological gender.” In Florida, a law signed by Gov. Ron DeSantis (R) keeps “biological males” from playing on the women’s sports teams in public schools.

This term, “biological males,” is everywhere now. And it’s not used only by right-wing politicians. People of good faith are also wrestling with the way trans people complicate a world they thought was binary. They’re uncertain about when, and how, sex matters, and just how biological it is. Some want to draw a bright line in areas where maleness and femaleness might matter most — in sports, or locker rooms, or prisons. Others are trying to blur lines that used to be clearer. At Wellesley College last month, for instance, a nonbinding student referendum called for the admission of trans men to a school that traditionally has been a women’s college. The president of the college, Paula Johnson, pushed back.

So what, then, is a biological male, or female? What determines this supposedly simple truth? It’s about chromosomes, right?

Well, not entirely. Because not every person with a Y chromosome is male, and not every person with a double X is female. The world is full of people with other combinations: XXY (or Klinefelter Syndrome), XXX (or Trisomy X), XXXY, and so on. There’s even something called Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, a condition that keeps the brains of people with a Y from absorbing the information in that chromosome. Most of these people develop as female, and may not even know about their condition until puberty — or even later.

How can this be, if sex is only about a gene?

>Some people respond by saying that sex is about something else, then — ovaries, or testicles (two structures that begin their existence in the womb as the same thing).

What do we do then, with the millions of women who have had hysterectomies? Have they become men? What about women who’ve had mastectomies? Or men with gynecomastia, or enlarged breasts.

Are these people not who they think they are?

It may be that what’s in your pants is less important than what’s between your ears

In the past decade, there has been some fascinating research on the brains of transgender people. What is most remarkable about this work is not that trans women’s brains have been found to resemble those of cisgender women, or that trans men’s brains resemble those of cis men. What the research has found is that the brains of trans people are unique: neither female nor male, exactly, but something distinct.

But what does that mean, a male brain, or a female brain, or even a transgender one? It’s a fraught topic, because brains are a collection of characteristics, rather than a binary classification of either/or. There are researchers who would tell you that brains are not more gendered than, say, kidneys or lungs. Gina Rippon, in her 2019 book “The Gendered Brain,” warns against bunk science that declares brains to be male or female — it’s “neurosexism,” a fancy way of justifying the belief that women’s brains are inferior to men’s.

And yet scientists continue to study the brain in hopes of understanding whether a sense of the gendered self can, at least in part, be the result of neurology. A study described by author Francine Russo in Scientific American examined the brains of 39 prepubertal and 41 adolescent boys and girls with gender dysphoria. The experiment examined how these children responded to androstadienone, a pungent substance similar to pheromones, that is known to cause a different response in the brains of men and women. The study found that adolescent boys and girls who described themselves as trans responded like the peers of their perceived gender. (The results were less clear with prepubescent children.)

This kind of testing is important, said one of the researchers Russo quoted, “because sex differences in responding to odors cannot be influenced by training or environment.” A similar study was done in measuring the responses of trans boys and girls to echolike sounds produced in the inner ear. “Boys with gender dysphoria responded more like typical females, who have a stronger response to these sounds.”

What does it mean, to respond to the world in this way? For me, it has meant having a sense of myself as a woman, a sense that no matter how comfortable I was with the fact of being feminine, I was never at ease with not being female. When I was young, I tried to talk myself out of it, telling myself, in short, to “get over it

But I never got over it.

I compare it to a sense of homesickness for a place you’ve never been. The moment you stepped onto those supposedly unfamiliar shores, though, you’d have a sense of overwhelming gratitude, and solace, and joy. Home, you might think. I’m finally home.

The years to come will, perhaps, continue to shed light on the mysteries of the brain, and to what degree our sense of ourselves as gendered beings has its origins there. But there’s a problem with using neurology as an argument for trans acceptance — it suggests that, on some level, there is something wrong with transgender people, that we are who we are as a result of a sickness or a biological hiccup.

But trans people are not broken. And, in fact, trying to open people’s hearts by saying “Check out my brain!” can do more harm than good, because this line of argument delegitimizes the experiences of many trans folks. It suggests that there’s only one way to be trans — to feel trapped in the wrong body, to go through transition, and to wind up, when all is said and done, on the opposite-gender pole. It suggests that the quest trans people go on can only be considered successful if it ends with fitting into the very society that rejected us in the first place.

All the science tells us, in the end, is that a biological male — or female — is not any one thing, but a collection of possibilities.

No one who embarks upon a life as a trans person in this country is doing so out of caprice, or a whim, or a delusion. We are living these wondrous and perilous lives for one reason only — because our hearts demand it. Given the tremendous courage it takes to come out, given the fact that even now trans people can still lose everything — family, friends, jobs, even our lives — what we need now is not new legislation to make things harder. What we need now is understanding, not cruelty. What we need now is not hatred, but love.

When the person in that Chevy ad sings, Oh, I want to be free … to feel the way I feel. Man, I feel like a woman!, the important thing is not that they feel like a woman, or a man, or something else. What matters most is the plaintive desire, to be free to feel the way I feel.

Surely this is not a desire unique to trans people. Tell me: Is there anyone who has never struggled to live up to the hard truths of their own heart?

Man! I feel like a human.

Complete Article HERE!

When Bodies Defy Boxes

— Rethinking How We Categorize Sex

By

Decades ago in college, I had a lively discussion with friends about the “Four Food Groups,” a food classification system we had all grown up with in the ‘70s and ‘80s. The so-called “Basic Four” (defined as meats, dairy, fruits/vegetables, and grains) was just one in a series of ever-evolving teaching tools created by the USDA to nudge Americans toward healthier eating habits.

One friend was earnestly critiquing the system. “The Basic Four reflects the outsized influence of the meat and dairy industries,” she said, going on about structures of power in government agencies. “The whole system is wrong,” she exclaimed. “When you look at food in nature, there are actually 12 food groups.”

Another friend sighed. “In nature,” she asserted, “there are no food groups.” Food groups are made-up categorization systems we apply to edible stuff because we find it useful. There are infinite ways we can create food groups (by color, flavor, growing region, plant/animal source, vitamin content, etc.). There could be four, 40, or 400 categories, depending on our goals.

In other words, food groups shouldn’t be mistaken for telling unwavering “truth” about food. They are just convenient systems we use to make meaning from our world. And it doesn’t hurt here to note that the way we choose to group anything usually reflects certain underlying values and assumptions.

Categorizing Sex

Now let’s consider the concept of “sex.” For our purposes, I’m not talking about “sex” as an activity we can enjoy. Rather, I am talking about “sex” as a system that we use to categorize bodies.

In most of our cultural and scientific language, when we refer to the “sex” of humans, we’re usually offered two options, female or male. When we’re taught about sexual anatomy and reproduction in our sex ed classes, we are presented with two sets of drawings to represent genitals and reproductive organs.

This binary female/male framework is reinforced in countless systems that we interact with daily, from “F” or “M” checkboxes on our birth certificates and government-issued IDs, to our health insurance paperwork, to organized sports, to name a few. It all appears so simple.

The trouble with this system is that the observed reality of natural variations in human bodies isn’t that simple. Yes, we most often observe people who fit common patterns of “male” and “female” in terms of their gonads, genitals, chromosomes, and hormonal levels. But intersex people, who make up about 1.7% of the population, have sex traits or reproductive anatomy that varies from those typical definitions of male or female.

There is no single way to be intersex; it is an umbrella term encompassing a variety of differences in genitalia, hormones, internal anatomy, or chromosomes. Some intersex characteristics can be seen at birth, while others become evident at puberty, when trying to conceive a child, or through genetic testing. There are over 40 known intersex variations, and we’re still learning. The science of sex has become more nuanced in recent decades. Human sexual development is a complex process that involves multiple stages and a cascade of biological processes. Is it really a surprise that folks in our communities reflect natural variations beyond two strict outcomes?

There is no doubt that the categories of female and male can at times be useful. But there are also times when insisting on the rigidity of those categories is limiting and damaging. Serious trouble creeps in when folks insist that female and male are the “only,” “true,” or “natural” options. Our politics is currently rife with such essentialist language, reinforcing the erasure, stigma, and harm that intersex folks are often subjected to in our society.

Unnecessary surgeries on intersex youth

One form of injustice that intersex people have faced for decades is the imposition of binary sex norms by the medical establishment in the form of “normalizing” surgeries. These are non-lifesaving procedures that aim to change natural variations in genital appearance based on ideas about what a “normal” body looks like. Most of these surgeries are done when a child is under 2 years old, denying people important choices about their own bodies—choices that can affect fertility, sexual function, and emotional well-being.

Across the U.S. (including Wisconsin), embedded within the text of 25 anti-transgender bills that would deny trans youth access to gender-affirming medical care, there is also specific language included that allows the continuation of surgical procedures on intersex kids—without their consent. You read that correctly: legislators who want to ban trans teens from getting medical procedures that they have consented to are perfectly okay with supporting non-consensual “normalizing” genital surgeries on intersex infants, despite intersex advocacy groups, human rights organizations, and three former U.S. Surgeons General recommending such surgeries be halted. Weaponizing a strict binary of sex appears to be more important to these legislators than the bodily autonomy and rights of trans and intersex youth.

Complete Article HERE!

What Does it Mean to be Gender Fluid

By Eloisa De Farias

What Does it Mean to be Gender Fluid

Identity is ever-changing, it may be difficult to understand where you stand and that is totally okay! Sexuality and gender is fluid, the most important part is letting yourself explore and learn what you feel the most comfortable with.

In this article, we’ll tackle what it means to be gender fluid and what it entails to be a part of this community.

What does being gender fluid mean?

The term gender fluid refers to someone whose gender identity is not fixed. This means that this individual is flexible when it comes to how they present their gender. For example one day they might feel extremely feminine, but a week later feel much more masculine in their gender presentation. Of course this idea of “masculine” and “feminine” are rooted in the binary that society presents, for many gender fluid individuals the concept of gender is not relevant to their identity.

It is important to note that gender expression/identity is different from sexuality, while sexuality defines your sexual orientation (who you are attracted to), gender identity defines how you express yourself gender-wise. There is also a difference between gender identity and gender expression. Identity is the gender identification the person chooses, versus expression, which is the way people express said gender identity whether that be feminine, masculine, both, or none.

Learning that you might be a part of the gender fluid community might be scary at first, but there are many ways to plug yourself into the community and learn to be comfortable with yourself.

if you’re curious about how you might identify, here’s what you should know about what being gender fluid means:

History of the word gender fluid

The word gender fluid first came into play in 1980 alongside other terms such as transgender and gender queer. The understanding of the word was influenced by figures such as Philosopher Judith Butler who popularized the idea of gender deconstruction and brought to light that idea that gender does not have to be binary (male or female.)

Like most terms that were popularized during this time, the Internet was responsible for making them known and more commonly used. Because communities formed on social media websites such as Tumblr and Twitter members of the gender fluid community began using the word more frequently in the early 2000s putting the term on the map.

In 2014 Facebook and OKCupid added gender fluid as an option to their gender selection. Of course these kinds of additions helped the word become popularized and more individuals were able to put a label to how they felt. A variety of celebrities such as Janelle Monáe and Sam Smith came out as non-binary and this opened up the conversation of gender fluidity further and made it in a way mainstream.

Alternatives to the word gender fluid

Because identity is personal and different people are comfortable using different terms there are a variety of ways to say the word polyamorous, including:

  • Nonbinary
  • Androgynous

Over time language evolves and this creates new words derived from a multitude of historical nuances. Labels and terms can also carry connotations, bad or good, which is why one might identify more with one term over the other despite them meaning the same thing. It is also important to note that the gender fluid community can encompass homosexual, nonbinary, trangender individuals, and so much more.

What NOT to call gender fluid people

Hateful words that refer to the gender fluid community should always be erased from conversations and speech. The term gender fluid has a variety of definitions and usages, but negative connotations and stereotypes remain. offensive words should be avoided at all costs, as they are derogatory.

It is also critical to note that members of the gender fluid community have begun to reclaim derogatory terms to take back the oppression they have faced. Although within the community this is acceptable it is still not okay to refer to gender fluid people with a derogatory term if one is not a part of the community themselves. Always ask before assuming someone’s gender identity.

What makes someone gender fluid?

If you think you might identify as gender fluid try asking yourself these questions: Do you feel like there is not one set gender that describes you? Does the idea of identifying with more than one gender resonate with you? If you answered yes, you might be a part of the gender fluid community.

To further understand gender fluidity it is critical to know that it sits under the non-binary umbrella. Under the non-binary umbrella we find a variety of identities such as agender, demigender, genderqueer, and of course gender fluid. All these identities have one thing in common: not conforming to the traditional binary ideals that society imposes. Within the gender fluid world there is also diversity amongst how one expresses themselves. For example gender fluid people can use they/them pronouns or they could use he/him pronouns, they can be homosexual or they can be asexual. There is not one right way to be gender fluid.

The timeline may also vary. For instance, for some people being gender fluid is temporary until they find a gender identity that matches them, others are indefinitely gender fluid and don’t see themselves becoming fixed on one gender. The way in which gender fluid people express themselves also changes from person to person, some may seek gender-affirming medical treatment to better captivate their identity while others might fluctuate their wardrobe choices. It’s needless to say that the approaches to gender fluidity are endless.

It’s always a great idea to trust that members of the community know more about their identity than you do. Listen to gender fluid people when they speak about their identities.

Perspectives on being gender fluid

Fortunately for the gender fluid community, society is beginning to embrace the idea of dismantling binary ideals. Fashion runways and beauty brands have taken it upon themselves to be less gendered and more inclusive. That being said there are things that we must do ourselves to allow for the normalization of gender fluidity in a gendered society. For example the use of pronouns. An easy way to make gender fluid people feel heard is to share your pronouns and ask them what theirs might be before initiating a conversation, this way everyone’s gender identity is taken into consideration and there is no room for hurting feelings.

Because not all people are considerate of gender identity, there are many times when gender fluid people may feel what is called gender dysphoria. This refers to the distress one might feel regarding the mismatch between their gender identity and the sex they were assigned at birth. Gender dysphoria can cause dissatisfaction, depression, and anxiety, and This is why many gender fluid individuals seek gender affirmation whether that be changing their name and pronouns or performing medical procedures. Things such as using someone’s dead name or the wrong pronouns can cause extreme gender dysphoria which is why it is critical to listen to people when they speak about their gender identity and how they want to be referred to.

The gender fluid flag

The gender fluid flag was created by JJ Poole in 2012. The stripes on the flag represent as follows:

  • Blue: Masculinity
  • Pink: Femininity.
  • Purple: Both masculinity and femininity.;
  • Black: Lack of gender.
  • White: All genders.

Bottom Line

The bottom line is that gender fluidity comes in a variety of fonts, the spectrum regarding gender identity will always be never ending. The concept of gender itself should be dismantled. The binary world we live in does us all a disservice as there is no real “right” or “correct” way to express gender. Colors, products, and activities don’t have genders and they should never be restricted or limited to one gender identity. Gender and expression can fluctuate from day to day and there is nothing wrong with that, there is no need for gender to be fixed. It is important to explore the ways in which we express gender.

If some of the ideas above resonate with you and you’re thinking of coming out, make sure the conditions are safe and have a plan of action regarding housing and food if things don’t go as planned.

Complete Article HERE!

Love and sex in 2022

— The five biggest lessons of the year

Shedding binaries, shaking off taboos and more – in a year with big events and changes, love and sex looked different, too.

By Jessica Klein

The ways we think about sex and love are always evolving, constantly influenced by cultural, political and global happenings. 

This year was no different. Much of that influence particularly spread online, especially in communities by and for those who identify across the LGBTQIA+ spectrum. Meanwhile, ripple effects from the self-reflection undertaken throughout the Covid-19 pandemic continued to rock the wider dating world, resulting in more intentional practices. People thought more about who they wanted to date, and how they wanted to do it. 

In 2022, this meant more folks openly moved away from both gender and attraction binaries. We saw people rely even more on the internet to find potential partners, for better and for worse. And daters got increasingly vocal about exploring different types of relationships, from solo polyamory to platonic life partnerships.

People are moving away from long-held binaries

In Western culture, relationships, gender and sexuality have long been defined by binaries. Either a couple is dating or they’re not; a person is attracted to women or men; a person is either a woman or man. Throughout the past several years, however, these binaries have grown steadily less entrenched, as more people are looking at sexual orientations and gender identities in different ways. And this was especially pronounced in 2022.

As far as sexual orientation, a person’s gender has become less relevant for many people when looking for a partner; this is especially the case for many millennials and Gen Zers navigating intimate relationships. For some, it’s even ended up at the “bottom of the list” in terms of what they desire in a partner. That’s particularly true for people who identify as queer or pansexual, meaning their romantic and/or sexual attractions don’t hinge on gender.

As 23-year-old, London-based Ella Deregowska put it, identifying as pansexual has allowed her to “fluidly move and accept each attraction I feel without feeling like I need to reconsider my identity or label in order to explain it”. Experts say the increased openness towards non-binary attractions, in part, is linked to increased representation in popular media – from television shows such as Canada’s Schitt’s Creek, in which Dan Levy plays the pansexual David Rose, to celebrities like Janelle Monae, who’ve identified with pansexuality.

It’s not just sexual orientation that’s felt a shift from binaries this year. More young folk (and celebrities) have also moved away from binaries to describe their gender. Identifying as non-binary or gender fluid lets many people express themselves more genuinely, since that expression may not inhabit one black-or-white category. “One day I wake up and feel more feminine, and maybe I want to wear a crop top and put earrings on. And then there’s times in which I’m like, I need my [chest] binder [to minimise the appearance of my breasts],” says Barcelona-based Carla Hernando, 26.

Even with more people breaking down sexual and gender binaries, however, dating can still be a minefield for those who identify as non-binary. From dating apps enforcing gender binaries, to partners pushing non-binary daters into gendered roles, not all parts of society have caught up with the movement away from binary gender norms.

In 2022, binaries grew less entrenched, as more people looked at sexual orientations and gender (Credit: Getty)
In 2022, binaries grew less entrenched, as more people looked at sexual orientations and gender

We’re increasingly challenging relationship taboos and traditions

Relationships among young daters have increasingly bucked entrenched norms this year.

Gen Z is has particularly embraced the grey area of dating by purposefully entering into ‘situationships’. These connections satisfy needs for close companionship, intimacy and sex, but don’t necessarily hinge on long-term relationship goals – instead existing somewhere between a relationship and a casual hook-up. Per Elizabeth Armstrong, a sociology professor at the University of Michigan, US, who studies these types of relationships, Gen Zers feel that “the situationship, for whatever reason, works for right now. And for right now, ‘I’m not going to worry about having a thing that is ‘going somewhere’”.

Overall, openness towards many kinds of non-traditional relationships has gained visibility, too. Ethical non-monogamy has been all over TikTok, often in the form of polyamorous relationships, in which more than two committed romantic and sexual partners cohabit. Then there are open relationships, which can look like anything from partners who hook up with other couples together, to those who have separate relationships with others outside their primary partnership. There are also poly people who prefer to live solo, embracing a ‘solo polyamorous’ lifestyle, through which they live alone but engage in multiple, committed relationships. Others to choose to cohabit with platonic partners, forming lasting relationships and even buying homes and planning futures with close friends rather than lovers.

Yet despite all this, plenty of relationship taboos and myths have endured, and likely will continue to. Single shaming, for instance, has been going strong since the start of the pandemic, when a survey by dating service Match showed 52% of UK-based single adults had experienced shaming for their (lack of) relationship status. And people still judge Leonardo DiCaprio and friends for their wide age-gap relationships. Meanwhile, myths like the idea of ‘opposites attracting’ endure, even though they often don’t.

Splitting became both easier and harder in 2022; divorce coaches thrived even as finances trapped couples together (Credit: Getty)
Splitting became both easier and harder in 2022; divorce coaches thrived even as finances trapped couples together

Breaking up is hard to do – and Covid-19 and the economy make it harder

The increased comfort around different ways to date hasn’t made break-ups any easier. Plenty of couples who blossomed under Covid-19 restrictions felt this acutely in 2022 – having started dating in ‘couple bubbles’ during lockdowns, many are struggling to adapt to relationships under more normal conditions. Some couples who thrive in solitude, it turns out, don’t cut it in the real world.

Yet in 2022, we’ve seen solutions for couples teetering on the edge of a break-up. “Life-changing” divorce coaches can help married couples navigate the mental health struggles of their break-ups, from the UK to Canada. These coaches represent a shift towards the normalisation of both seeking therapeutic aid in times of great stress, and of divorce overall. “It is no longer seen as a flaw of character, or a failure in one’s own life to divorce,” says Yasmine Saad, a clinical psychologist and founder of Madison Park Psychological Services in New York City. Hiring a divorce coach, therefore, is as natural as “wanting financial advice before investing your money”.

Or, couples who want to go the distance can try a gap year – an extended break that doesn’t signify the end of their relationships. Relationship therapists report seeing more of this in the wake of the pandemic, as couples who felt cooped up together over the last couple years want to explore life solo without breaking up.

Yet for couples set on splitting, the latest economic downtown has trapped some in joint living situations. Living alone these days, after all, isn’t cheap, and neither is buying an ex-partner out of their share of a joint dwelling. As Chantal Tucker, 37, who co-owns a London property with her ex-partner, put it, “I knew that I would never be able to afford to buy property again, and the prospect of renting in London forever was increasingly unpleasant.”

Some millennials struggled with 'dead bedrooms' in 2022 (Credit: Getty)
Some millennials struggled with ‘dead bedrooms’ in 2022

People are trying to make the increasingly bleak world of dating better 

For those who are single, meanwhile, navigating the treacherous waters of dating apps has still been hard.

It’s undeniable that dating apps have become the primary way for younger daters (millennials and Gen Z) to meet, with thousands of online dating sites in existence and 48% of 18 to 29-year-olds in the US using them. Unfortunately, bad behaviour on these apps is abundant, ranging from people using them to engage in infidelity or even harassment, the brunt of which female-identified users receive. It’s no wonder many people have become totally burnt out on online dating. Daters of all genders report being overwhelmed by the choices available on dating apps, saying it feels more like playing a numbers game than engaging with real potential partners.

“I feel burnt out sometimes when I feel like I have to swipe through literally 100 people to find someone who I think is moderately interesting,” says Philadelphia, US-based Rosemary Guiser, 32, but it’s almost impossible to avoid using apps to meet someone. “You could compare [their supremacy] a little bit to Amazon or Facebook,” says Nora Padison, a licensed graduate professional counsellor in Baltimore, US.

But because of the pandemic, people have become used to meeting online as an initial encounter. That pre-screening, for many, has been viewed as a safer, smarter way to decide to go on a real-life date, and it’s still the way many singles are engaging in more “intentional” dating. Another way is by doing it sober. A 2022 trends survey by dating service Bumble showed 34% of UK users were more likely to go on sober dates since the start of the pandemic, and 62% said they’d be more apt to form “genuine connections” when doing so.

Some bedrooms are ‘dead’, while others are booming

While the pandemic gave people time to explore and even reconsider their sexualities, it also definitely took a toll on people’s sex lives, specifically millennial couples. Data from 2021 shows US-based, married millennials reporting the most problems with sexual desire that year, often attributed to exhaustion from heavy workloads, mental health issues and financial stressors.

This year, we learned millennial couples seem to be arriving at sexless relationships faster than their older counterparts – as San Francisco, US-based sex therapist Celeste Hirschman noticed, it used to take her coupled clients around 10 to 15 years to stop having sex with each other. “Now, it’s maybe taking three to five,” she says.

But while many married millennials have struggled with sexless marriages, Baby Boomers may be having the best sex of their lives – their experience and patience having resulted in more bedroom skills and better communication. Gen Z – who  have a reputation for not having sex enough – are really just engaging in it more pragmatically. Their focus isn’t on settling down for the sake of it, but on getting their own lives together before bringing in a committed partner or thinking about starting a family.

Regardless of the type of sex anyone is having, there’s good news. Embracing a positive, growth mindset can make your sex life better. New Year’s resolution, anyone?

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