Category Archives: Long-distance Relationships

And they’re off…

Name: Dan and Rebecca
Gender: Couple
Age: 25, 20
Location:
We are a happy but frustrated couple looking for advice. I’m a 25
year old male, and my lovely girlfriend is 20.

I have no problem bringing her to orgasm and pleasing her, but since we’ve been seeing each other I have not been able to cum once. In the past it was always difficult for me to cum during sex, my first time (age 18) my then gf and I went for about three hours before we just gave up. Usually I would have to jerk myself off afterwards but now I can’t even do that.

However if I am alone with porn I am easily able to masturbate and can get off a few times a day. How is it that I can jerk off to pictures that mean nothing to me, but can’t cum for the woman I love the most?

I’ve spoken with a doctor and he said medically there is nothing wrong with my penis. What do you suggest we do? We are really getting frustrated and just want to be able to please each other.

Simply put, there’s a difference between the psycho-sexual response we have when we are alone and the one we experience with a partner. Your doctor is right, there’s probably nothing wrong with your unit. It’s all in your head…or your mind, to be more exact. And I’m not being flippant.

If I had to guess, I’d say you have a real bad case of performance anxiety, pup. Here’s how this nasty thing works. Say I have a less than satisfying sexual experience for one reason or another. Before I know it, I’m replaying the incident over and over in my mind’s eye till that’s all I can think about. The proverbial molehill has become a mountain, don’t ‘cha know. I then bring my anxiety to my next encounter. My hyper self-consciousness primes me for more disappointment. And I’m all prepared to interpret the disappointment as a failure. Well, you can see where I’m going with this, huh? My fears become self-fulfilling and I find I’m beginning to avoid partnered sex and my relationship flounders, I develop a full-blown sexual dysfunction and my self-esteem takes a nosedive. My preoccupation with my problem makes it less likely that I’ll be fully present during sex with my partner, which pretty much scuttles my sexual responsiveness and any hope for spontaneity.

It looks to me like performance anxiety is putting a damper on your sexual arousal and short-circuiting your sexual response cycle, Dan. Get thee to a sex-positive therapist ASAP, darling! Believe me, this is nothing to fool around with, especially for someone at your tender age.

When I see this sort of thing in my private practice, I always begin the therapeutic intervention by calling a moratorium on fucking of any kind. This immediately takes a great deal of the pressure off the couple. From there we begin to rebuild the partnered psycho-sexual response one step at a time. We begin with sensate focus training, stress reduction and relaxation exercises. I have the greatest confidence in this method; it succeeds over 90% of the time.

Good luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Name: Gene
Gender:  Male
Age: 45
Location: Orlando
I am a homosexual, and I have a “friend” who has been incarcerated for five years. The relationship while he was out with me was excellent. I have asked him numerous of times is he having sex with the homo’s in jail and he responds by saying no. I think otherwise, and he wants to come back to me upon his release. My question is “should I wait for him”?

Gene, Gene, Gene, there are so many things wrong with this picture, I hardly know where to start. Your man’s in the big house for 5 years, and you expect him to keep it in his pants for the duration…just for you? Like WHY? Hey, he’s in the clink, darling, not in a monastery. Oh wait; even monks in a monastery don’t keep it in their habit nowadays! At any rate, it may not be up to him if he has sex or not…if you catch my drift. He might be someone’s bitch right now, he’s just not telling you about it.

Should you wait for him? You mean, all alone by yourself with no one to comfort you while your guy is doin’ his time? This sounds like the script for a real bad 1950’s prison movie. You could play the role of the long-suffering girlfriend pining away while her good-for-nothing man pays his debt to society.

Honey, you need to get out more.

Good luck

Name: Erin
Gender: female
Age: 32
Location: AL
Is it wrong for a married woman to want to masturbate when alone?

Gee, let me see. Is it wrong for a woman to feed herself when she is alone?

Erin, what could possibly be wrong with wanting to pleasure yourself when you are alone? As we all know, many women only get off through masturbation. Hell nowadays, liberated women folk everywhere are comfortable enough with their sexuality to jill-off even with their partner. So no, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with self-pleasuring…alone or with a partner.

Besides, there’s no better way to get to know your body and your sexual response cycle. Once you acquainted yourself with how your body works, you’ll have a whole lot more information about how you tic that you’ll be able to share with your partner when the time comes. It’s a win/win situation for ya’ll.

Name: Joy
Gender:  female
Age: 21
Location: California
I have been dating this guy for almost 3 year and also live with him. I love the way he makes love to me and i love dick, but sometimes i just want to make out with girls… does this make me a lesbian at all?

Hardly, not even a little bit lesbian! Ya see, it takes more than suckin’ face with another chick to make a gal a lesbiterian. You’re gonna need to get yourself a she-mullet, some plaid shirts and a vibrator that you can kick-start. Now that’ll make ya dyke for damn sure. Sheesh!

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

A June Is Bustin’ Out All Over Q&A Show — Podcast #283 — 06/06/11


Hey sex fans, welcome back!

Yes siree, June is busting out all over! It’s pert’near summer and I just realized that we haven’t had a Q&A show since early last month. So ya know what else is bustin out all over? My voicemail and email in boxes, that’s what! I have a big hot load of questions from the sexually worrisome out there. And I’m all ready to dish out some snappy answers to dazzle and delight today’s correspondents, as well as everyone else in my audience.

  • Jackie hates it when her partner busts a nut ON her.
  • Ron is hoping I know where he can find some stray dick to suck.
  • LSSC has a husband who thinks sex is dirty.
  • Shades wants vibrating panties for men.
  • Michael thinks his wife is a mess, but actually it’s HIM.
  • RAHUL wants to know if women like sex as much as men.
  • Luke and his GF fuck like bunnies and now she’s sore.
  • Micah can’t keep it up and he’s too young for ED.
  • Conal has a porn jones and needs help.
  • Harrison wants to know how to clean his hole on a budget.
  • Wasim thinks his nuts are too small and soft.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Dr Dick’s Sex Advice and Dr Dick’s Sex Toy Review.

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously, or just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode

The Crotch Report

Name: Gillian
Gender: Female
Age: 27
Location: Paris
Hi Dr Dick, My boyfriend and I are having a long distance relationship. When living together, we used to have an intense sex life … so you can imagine how frustrated we feel now … I don’t know when I’m going to visit him and how we’re going to make it without having sex! Could you help us copping with the distance? Are there some techniques, sex toys, etc … we could use ? Of course I have a vibrator but it would be so much better if my boyfriend could participate in a way, and vice versa … I can’t wait to get your advice!! Thanks!

Long-distance romances aren’t fun! Never fall in love with anyone outside your zip code! That’s what I always say. Of course, when it comes to matters of the heart, most good advice goes out the window. Thanks to the marvels of modern technology I may have the solution to your dilemma. Do you guys cam with one another? I hope so. If not the following advice will still be helpful; you’ll just not have the juicy visuals.

c770.jpgYou’ll both need an iPod (or another music player) and you’ll need one of these puppies: OhMiBod iPod Vibrator (C770). You’ll find these right here in My Stockroom.

The OhMiBod iPod Vibrator is an exciting combination of modern musical and sexual technology. In today’s hi-tech, fast paced world it only makes sense to fuse together two of the most popular forms of technological recreation, listening to music on your iPod and masturbating using a high-powered vibrator.

The OhMiBod iPod Vibrator is very easy to use.

  • Simply plug the universal headphone connector into your iPod (or music player)
  • Plug 1 end of the 3-foot cord into the headphone connector, and one end into the jack in the vibrator’s silver end-cap.
  • Turn on your iPod and use the volume control wheel to increase the intensity, rhythm, and vibe function. The vibration level, and the rhythm it moves to, is determined by the volume and style of the music.

The vibrator is 71⁄2 ” long and has a 1″ diameter. The vibe, cord, and connector are all white, and the end-cap is silver. Smashing!

So here’s what you do…and you can take turns doing this too. Find some music that you know for sure will get you off. Share that music with your BF. Have him load it into his iPod. Then set up a cam date. After you exchange pleasantries, you can get down to business. Insert your vibe into your pussy; your BF will insert his vibe into his ass. Go to the play list you put together and simultaneously start the music. Despite the distance between you, you’ll have all the same sensations. Before you know it, you both will be haven’ screamin’ memes. How fun is that?

And when you guys aren’t camming, you’ll find the OhMiBod iPod Vibrator comes with an extra silver end-cap that can be used without the music player. Imagine what a swell holiday gift idea this will be for all you far-flung lovers.

Name: Terre
Gender:
Age: 54
Location: Nashville
What are some of the newer procedures available for peyronies??

For those not in the know, Peyronie’s disease causes a guys dick to bend or curve dramatically when he gets a hardon. A hard, fibrous layer of scar tissue (plaque) develops under the skin on one side of his dick. When he gets hard, the scar tissue pulls the affected area off at an angle, causing the curve or disfigurement. Sometimes things can get so bad that the pain makes fucking practically impossible.

There are several “therapies” out there; none of which is supported by any hard data as to its effectiveness. So caveat emptor, which is Latin for “Let the buyer beware”!

There are both internal and some external therapies. There is a very expensive enzymes therapy that is taken in pill form. Allegedly the enzymes help break up the scar tissue. It’s a very slow process, if it works at all and it requires a prolonged and consistent treatment. Cha ching!

Some doctors will inject drugs, like calcium channel blockers or interferon, directly into the plaque in a guy’s dick. These drugs are said to break down scar tissue deposits and return the tissue-building process to normal. This therapy calls for multiple injections over a period of months. And the success of this treatment varies considerably. Cha ching!

There are Penile Traction Devices too. These create a gentle continuous tension on a guy’s unit. The claim is that the stretching opens up spaces between penile cells, and triggers growth and healing, thus resolving the issue. This is dubious at best.

Here are a couple of resources for you: The Peyronie’s Disease Society and The Peyronie’s Disease Institute.

crw_5276_rj.jpg

Name: a
Gender: Male
Age: 22
Location: ph
if a male was to get a sex change would a vagina be able to be made to make the operation complete, and if so would having a baby be possible

Yep, a post-surgical Male to Female transexual will have had a “functional” vagina fashioned from the cock “she” once had.

Nope, it takes a lot more than a brand spankin’ new whoha to make babies, darlin’. A post-surgical Male to Female transexual may have a pussy, but she doesn’t have a womb…so no babies.

Name: victor
Gender: Male
Age: 39
Location: LA
I don’t like sex as much as i use to been with the same guy for 15 yrs and could do it all the time now only once a week and he has to initiate it but once we are doing it is great. What can i do about it? Thanks victor

You sound like you’re more bored with, than disinterested in, sex. If you were disinterested in sex, you wouldn’t enjoy it when you actually got around to having some.

Sounds like your sex life needs a little sprucin’ up…and who’s doesn’t? I want you to mozie on over to my online sex emporium — My Stockroom — and pick out something really fun and smutty for you and your old man. Don’t let another day go by without at least trying to get back on track!

I have a dazzling array of products that will liven up even the most ho-hum sex life. Not sure what to buy? Not to worry! Take a look at my monthly ever so popular, Sex Toy Awareness feature right here on drdicksexadvice.com. It’s chock-full of swell gift giving ideas.

Name: garciaf54
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Location: texas
Hi im 23 years old and i belive my packege isnt enough for the girl im dating and probably any. My dick is 6 inches nothing more nothing less but is this normal or i need help?

You’re worrying way too much about your package, darlin’. Your 6” is adequate for getting the job done, especially if you know how to use what you have. Women are generally less concerned about the size of the meat as they are about the quality of the motion.

So yeah, you’re normal, but you may also need some help. I’d suggest you check in with your GF and find out how you’re doin’ in the love makin’ department. I’d be willing to guess that she may have a few pointers for you on how better to use what you got. But you’ll have to ask her nicely.

Young pups, like you, rarely know their way around a fine pussy. Hell, most women don’t know their way around their own fine pussy. Young pups, like you, may also be unaware of all the sexual positions that would best utilize a modest johnson. If this sounds like you, I’d say you have some homework to do.

Name: krishna
Gender: Male
Age: 33
Location: india
i love my cousin sister a lot, i am enjoying sex with her, is that wrong?

I actually had to look up “cousin sister” on the internet. While I came up with some conflicting information, one thing seems clear, the term “cousin sister” connotes a close biological tie — a first cousin, perhaps. Is that what you’re talking about?

If so, most cultures, even yours, frown upon incest. There are plenty of good reasons for this; not least of all is a genetic concern (inbreeding). But often the most devastating aspect of incest is the secrecy. No one violates this universal taboo in the open. I’ll bet this is the case with you too, huh? The secrecy and the inevitable shame and guilt can destroy you family dynamic.

I suspect you may already be aware of this. Why else would you be asking me if it was wrong?

Name: brnwiee
Gender: Male
Age: 24
Location: canada
why does my condom always break? am i too big 4 normal condoms? my size is 7.5 inc long n 6.5 inc girth………am i thrusting too hard?/// n is it possible 4a girl too deepthroat it all?

Maybe you need a bigger sized condom, darling. You know there are different sizes, right? Shop online for extra large condoms. Most online retailers will offer a varietybiggunsampler.jpg pack of the big boys. This way you’ll be able to choose the right condom for you without buying a box full of just one kind from the get-go.

Depending on the “girl” I’d say, you betcha deep-throating 7.5 wouldn’t be a problem. However, finding that particular woman might be your biggest challenge. You may have to turn to a “pro” for that kind of service.

Name: ken
Gender: Male
Age: 45
Location: toronto canada
low sperm count is there anyway of building this up ?

Nope! Despite the myriad products online that proclaim they will build up your sperm count; it’s all baloney. Don’t waste your money!

Name: Paul
Gender: Malebj01.jpg
Age: 21
Location: RI
My gf used to give me blowjobs quite a bit but all of a sudden she stopped and kept telling me she can’t stand doing them. She has always said she didn’t like them but that she did them cause I liked them so much. Why the hell would she stop now?

I guess she’s trying to tell you she doesn’t like you as much as she once did.

Here’s a tip: most chicks dole out the hummers as a reward for being the best little boy in the world. If she’s cut you off, so to speak, perhaps you’ve done something to piss her off. I’d look into that, if I were you.

Good luck ya’ll

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