Category Archives: 3-way

One plus one…plus one equals three

Name: Lisa
Gender: Female
Age: 22
Location: USA
For the past 3 months, I’ve been living with my boyfriend and his roommate. The 3 of us have been having sex regularly since I moved in. While I enjoy 3-somes every once in a while, I would prefer to have sex with just my boyfriend. They are both really into it and when I’ve addressed this with my boyfriend, he seems to get disappointed and changes the subject. He’s a great guy and I don’t want to break up with him, I just want to have sex with him!! Any thoughts? Thanks

I don’t think I have enough information about your situation to be overly helpful, Lisa. I understand that the only sex you are having since you moved in with your BF is 3-way sex — you, your BF and his roommate. But what kind of sexual connection do you have with these guys? Is it simply guys on girl action, or is it a full-on bisexual romp?

I too would wonder why my significant other only wants to share me with another guy. That is so not the typical straight male response to his woman. While an occasional 3-way might be way fun and all, I’ve never heard of a guy insisting that all his sex be in a group. I can guarantee that something more is going on here than what meets the eye.

If your connection with these guys is simply the two guys gettin on with you, one motivation might be competition; wanting to compare themselves and their sexual prowess to one another. I can definitely imagine a couple of goofus friends goin at the same chick as sport. I mean, isn’t this what fraternities are for? Ya know, who can whip it out the fastest? Who can do the best stroke? Who can shoot the farthest? Who’s got the biggest dick? Etc. If this is the case, you are about as important to the sex as a basketball is to a basketball game. Ya can’t really play basketball without a basketball, but the game…that’s all about the players, not the ball…if ya catch my drift.

On the other hand, if your guys are gettin it on with each other while they’re gettin it on with you, then another dynamic is clearly at play. If that’s the case, your boys might be just a teensy bit queer. Not that that’s a bad thing necessarily. It’s just that the sex is not really about you, except that you’re the beard for the session. Many a closet case, even closet bisexuals, can’t face the reality of their own sexual proclivities. How do they get around having sex with someone of their own sex…as often as they would like without the stigma of the dreaded queer-cooties? That’s right, have a 3-way…and a lot of ‘em.

Either way, darlin’, seems to me somethin’s up with you BF and his roomie. I know you say you don’t want to loose him, but the fact is he may already be gone. Here’s how you can test my theory. Give the lad an ultimatum — you or the roomie! Just don’t be overly surprised to find yourself looking for a new place to live faster than you can say “slap and tickle.”

I’d love to hear more from you about this curious situation. Write again if you can.

Good luck

Back To School Q&A Show — Podcast #296 — 09/05/11

Hey sex fans, welcome back!

Happy Labor Day! I really loved having the last several weeks off from podcasting. As much as I love doing the podcasts they are loads of very hard work and a breather, from time to time is just what the doctor ordered. But now I’m back, all refreshed from the hiatus, and ready to address the concerns of the sexually worrisome who have been contacted me with their questions and concerns.

And I am delighted to welcome back my most excellent summer intern, Monique, again this week for her last show with us before she returns to the ivy-covered walls of academia. As you probably discovered last time she joined me, in Podcast 293, Monique is smart as a whip and has a remarkable talent for sex advice.

This week we hear from

  • Mystery Woman is involved in a very dangerous relationship.
  • Jerry is a crossdresser and he treats his wife like shit.
  • Worried has a “GF” but she won’t kiss him on the lips.
  • JGrant hasn’t been using protection while fucking around.
  • Laura is afraid she’ll fart at an inopportune time.

 

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for all my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Hot Plus Size Lingerie.

Plus Size Lingerie

More Sex EDGE-U-cation With Cooper Beckett & Ginger – Podcast #272 – 04/06/11

Hey sex fans, welcome back!

I’m so glad it’s finally Wednesday, because the founder of Life On The Swingset, Cooper Beckett, and his podcast co-host Ginger are here with more of their signature Sex EDGE-U-cation. I’ve been salivating for their return since Part 1 of this show appeared here last Wednesday.

But wait; you didn’t miss last week’s show, did you? Well, don’t worry if ya did, because Part 1 of our chat is archived right here on my site. Simply use the site’s search function in the header. Type in Podcast #270 and PRESTO! But hey, don’t forget to use the #sign when you search.

Ginger, Cooper and I discuss:

  • The sex toy review section of their site;
  • Promoting anal toys and pegging;
  • Similarities and differences between swinging and polyamory;
  • What’s consensual non-monogamy;
  • Swinging remains edgy for lots of people;
  • The CBS series, Swingtown, and other cultural references;
  • Debunking the swinger myths;
  • Communication, the backbone of all alternative lifestyles;
  • Working to close the bisexual double standard — W/W and M/M;
  • Embracing sexual diversity.

Be sure to visit Coop & Ginger on their site HERE! Find him on Facebook HERE! Read her blog HERE! And follow them both on Twitter HERE & HERE!

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Dr Dick’s Sex Advice and Dr Dick’s Sex Toy Review.

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously, or just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode

Sex EDGE-U-cation With Cooper Beckett & Ginger – Podcast #270 – 03/30/11

Hey sex fans, welcome back!

I have another mighty fine Sex EDGE-U-cation show coming your way today. This is, of course, the series where we take a look at the world of fetish sex, kink and alternative lifestyles. We touch on topics both familiar and exotic. And we get to chat with prominent educators, practitioners and advocates of unconventional sexual expressions and lifestyles from all over the world.

Speaking of prominent educators, practitioners and advocates, I have two such people as my guest today and both fit that bill exceptionally well. The founder of Life On The Swingset, Cooper Beckett and his ever so lovely podcast co-host, Ginger are here and ready to knock your socks off. We will be discussing a wide range of topics, with a focus on consensual nonmonogamy.

Listen, yours truly has been around the block a time…or six, I confess to being just a wee bit jaded around the edges. Ok, I’m not easily wowed, so sue me. But my guests today have me feeling like a “gee-wiz ain’t that amazing” kid again. And we can hardly get through interview for all the laughing. Join us; don’t miss all the fun.

Ginger, Cooper and I discuss:

  • Why he launched yet another swinger orientated website;
  • The unique perspective of the Life On The Swingset podcasts;
  • The helpful articles on their site;
  • Body image concerns for swingers;
  • Erectile dysfunction in swing-dom;
  • Tips for communicating with other swingers;
  • Coming out as alt;
  • The Links section on the Life On The Swingset site.

Be sure to visit Coop & Ginger on their site HERE! Find him on Facebook HERE! Read her blog HERE! And follow her on Twitter HERE!

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for all my podcasts on iTunes. You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Dr Dick’s Stockroom.

drdicksstockroom.jpg

Moving Pictures

One of the more common questions I get at Dr Dick Sex Advice is about how to navigate opening a previously sexually exclusive relationship to include another or others.  It’s generally hard to offer advice to a couple that I don’t know.  So I often wind up suggesting some general guidelines — how the couple could begin the discussion, set some ground rules, find a compatible partner(s), enjoy the ride, and debrief afterward.

Unfortunately, this approach can make the idea of a threesome, group sex or swinging pretty mundane.  And believe you me; they are hardly ever that.  That’s why I’m grateful that my colleague, author, columnist, editor, and sex educator, Tristan Taormino, brings to life the joys of a ménage à trois.

Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Threesomes $29.95

This video is a collaboration between Tristan and the mammoth porn production expert guidecompany, Vivid.  In fact, it’s hard to tell their educational programming from their porn productions.  There are very high production values, as one would expect.  There is none of the awkwardness one might find in an amateur production.  The performers are uniformly beautiful and the sex is hot.

There is a down side to this; however.  It all seems a little too slick and studied; the porn influence, I’d guess.  The performers don’t really discuss what they what to do with each other and everything appears effortless.  This isn’t an accurate representation of any three-way I’ve even known.  And for someone wanting to figure out how to approach this kind of coupling, there’s precious little nuts ‘n bolts kind of information.

But maybe that’s the point, after all.  Does educational and enrichment programming have to be clinical or pedantic?  I don’t think so.  And let’s face it; a whole lot more people fantasize about threesomes than will actually participate in one.  So this is the ideal material for that group.  It’s fun, it’s pretty, it’s full of sex and no one has a care in the world.  Fantasy material indeed!

Oh, and you should know that this presentation has a decidedly heterosexual bent.  There’s girl-on-girl action, no surprise there; but no guy-on-guy action.  Was a teachable moment missed?  I think so, but I wouldn’t have expected anything different from a Vivid production.

I have one major bone to pick with this project; no condoms were used during any of the sex scenes.  This is a HUGE no-no in my book, particularly since this is billed as an educational video.  Would it have killed them to tip their hat to the necessity of safe sex when multiple sex partners are involved?  I gotta tell you I was really disappointed by this.

Tristan opens the DVD with some basics. She talks about some of the reasons why people have a 3-way and the sexual opportunities they present.  She outlines the two kinds of threesomes — The Triangle:  in which everyone is sexual with everyone, and The V: in which two people have sex with a third person, but not each other.

The DVD has, appropriately enough, three scenes.

Scene 1:  We meet India Summer, Hailey James, and Jack Lawrence; they get together for a steamy ménage a trios. Both India and Haileey are hot for some girl-on-girl action, and now they can pig out.  So yeah for that!  There is also some nice toy use in this scene.

Scene 2:  Shows us an example of The “V” type of threesome.  Daisy Marie gets it on with both Derrick Pierce and his friend Christian.  The men do not interact sexually with one another, which was a bummer for me.  But everyone has a good gooey time anyway.

Scene 3: Here we have a wide-open threesome; everyone is into everyone.  Penny Flame and Justice Young make out while Harmony is jillin-off on the bed.  The gals get it on with each other as well as turn their attention to Justice.  A big old vibe is introduced and everyone gets off big time.

Here’s a tip: if you’re can buy materials like this, you can rent this DVD as a whole or by the scene in my How To Video Library.

Full review HERE

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