Category Archives: Spanking

If it’s not one thing, it’s another…

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Name: Malcolm
Gender: Male
Age: 40
Location: Johannesburg
I’m in love with this guy who is as sweet as the day is long. He’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a partner. What makes him so charming is he’s only recently come out as gay. Before this he was married. He is not jaded like so many other guys I meet. But there’s a problem. He’s real vanilla. I guess that’s the down side of coming out of a heterosexual marriage at the age of 35. He’s happy as a clam fucking me a couple times a week. He thinks anal sex is really adventurous and sexually daring. I on the other hand, am suffocating in the boredom. I know, now I sound really jaded, but I can’t help it. It’s just that there’s so much more to sex than what we are doing. I want to introduce him to some kinky shit, but I’m afraid that I will scare him off. What the fuck should I do?

I absolutely adore messages that start out: “I’m so in love. He/she is everything I ever wanted, blah, blah, blah!” Because I know that only a few words later the other shoe is gonna drop, and drop hard. “But there’s a problem, blah, blah, blah!”

Of course there’s a problem. There is always a problem…even with Mr. or Ms. Perfect, or maybe because your honey is so freakin perfect. Take it from me, sexual dissatisfaction will upset even the most tranquil and rosy apple cart and send everyone into a tizzy. Allow me to share with you something I wrote about this very issue about ten years ago. I think you will find the advice as fresh as the day it was written.

So you’ve met the person of your dreams only you haven’t got around to telling your new honey your dirty little secret. The sweet thing hasn’t a clue that you’re itchin’ for some big time bondage. Or that you’d sell your soul to be dominated like the scum that you are. Or you’re salivating over that dildo you have tucked away in the attic, the one that could be mistaken for a floor lamp. Or you’re craving to be spanked till your shameless ass glows in the dark. Or you want to hump his/her feet like a dog and gobble up his/her toe jam. Or you have this nasty little thing about spike heels, frilly knickers and jungle red lipstick.

Never fear, Dr. Dick has heard it all a million times before. Some sorry pervert’s got it bad for white bread. Dear Dr. Dick, Help! I’m in love with the sweetest guy/gal in the word, but our sex life is all vanilla all the time. I’m bored shitless! I know how to liven things up, you see I have this fetish (you fill in the blank) but I don’t know how to tell him/her about it and I’m afraid s/he’ll freak if s/he finds out. What’s a perv to do?

Introducing your partner to your personal world of kink is tricky; the whole little love match could blow up in your face. But a life of pretense and sexual boredom isn’t the way to go either. Why not just stand tall like the disgusting depraved creature you are and brazenly proclaim your fetish to little Mary Sunshine. After all, unless your boyfriend or gal-pal is as dumb as a post s/he’s already figured out that your mutual sex life limps. Besides, there’s nothing more satisfying than corrupting an innocent. Who knows, s/he may have secrets of his/her own.

Here’s what I suggest. Casually direct the conversation to the amazing variety of human sexual expression. You could reassure your sweetie that just because some things are unfamiliar don’t make them bad. Tell him/her that you’ve been waiting for your relationship to mature so that you could share the intricacies of your desires with him/her. This can be one of those precious bonding moments that Oprah’s always talkin’ about. This might be a good time to view that special video you picked up in the kink section of the local porn emporium. Invite her/him to explore your fantasy with you. Tell the little flower that your love for him/her demands that you share the fullness of your sexuality with her/him. Then pick one turn-on for the two of you to experiment with — lingerie, toys, dominance and submission, role-playing, whatever.

Decide on a safe-word, an out of context word your partner could use if the experiment is heading in an uncomfortable direction. For example, if the dildo is too big or the lipstick is too red, s/he could say “pickles.” The safe-word, when uttered in the scenario, will let you know that you need to change direction or slow down without completely destroying the built up sexual energy.

If this initiation process doesn’t work Dr. Dick suggests that you cut your losses and dump the white bread. Go out and find yourself a kindred spirit, someone you won’t have to apologize to for being creative in your sex play.

Good luck

Guess What, Honey? I’m A Kinky Old Perv!

And now, by popular demand, a reprint of an old favorite.

So you’ve met the person of your dreams only you haven’t got around to telling your new honey your dirty little secret. The sweet thing hasn’t a clue that you’re itchin’ for some big-time bondage. Or that you’d sell your soul to be dominated like the lowly little bitch that you are. Or you’re salivating over that dildo you have tucked away in the attic—you know, the one that could be mistaken for a floor lamp. Or you’re craving to be spanked til your shameless ass glows in the dark. Or you want to hump his/her feet like a dog and gobble up his/her toejam. Or you have this nasty little thing about spike heels, frilly knickers and jungle red lipstick.

Never fear—Dr. Dick has heard it all a million times before. Some sorry pervert’s got it bad for white bread.

Dear Dr. Dick,
Help! I’m in love with the sweetest guy/gal in the word, but our sex life is all vanilla all the time. I’m bored shitless! I know how to liven things up, you see I have this fetish (you fill in the blank) but I don’t know how to tell him/her about it and I’m afraid s/he’ll freak if s/he finds out. What’s a perv to do?

Introducing your partner to your personal world of kink can be a little tricky; the whole love match could blow up in your face. But a life of pretense and sexual boredom isn’t the way to go, either. Why not just stand tall like the filthy pervert you are and brazenly proclaim your fetish to Little Miss Mary Sunshine? After all, unless your boyfriend or gal-pal is as dumb as a post s/he’s already figured out that your mutual sex life walks with a pronounced limp (or perhaps is suffering from a case of the gout). Besides, there’s nothing more satisfying than corrupting an innocent. Who knows—s/he may have secrets of his/her own.

Case in point. Here’s part of an exchange I had with a young man from Omaha.

Dear Doc,
I’m 23, and I’ve been dating 30-year-old chick for nearly a year now. I come from a very conservative Christian upbringing and I love that she is more experienced than me. My girlfriend likes to tie me up. I’m a college gymnast so I have very defined muscles. They are a huge turn on for my girlfriend, which I guess explains why she likes to see me struggle against the rope. I get real turned on too when I’m tied up. Sometimes she teases my penis and testicles with a feather or a piece of leather, which drives me wild. I’m worried though, because I think this is gonna warp me somehow. Do you think this is perverted? Why is it so much fun?

Ahhh yeah, Jake, I do think it’s perverted. I think your girlfriend is a big fat pervert and I think you’re still just a teensy-weensy little pervert—but well on your way to Big Fat Perverthood (note: Big Fat Perverthood is not a clinical term; just something we toss around the office for fun), just like your girlfriend. And why is this bondage thing so much fun? It’s such a blast because it IS perverted, IS nasty and IS forbidden, silly! One can only guess what your fundamentalist Christian mom and dad would think about their star athlete son trussed up like a Thanksgiving turkey while a considerably older dominatrix punishes his family jewels. I fear this apple has fallen a great distance from the tree, right, Jake? I absolutely love it!

Okay, back to telling your partner about your kink. Here’s what I suggest. Casually direct the conversation to the amazing variety of human sexual expression. You could reassure your sweetie that just because some things are unfamiliar to her/him doesn’t make them bad. Tell him/her that you’ve been waiting for your relationship to mature so that you could share the intricacies of your desires with him/her. This can be one of those precious bonding moments that Oprah is always going on about.

This might be a good time to view that special video you picked up in the kink section of the local porn emporium. Invite her/him to explore your fantasy with you. Tell the little flower that your love for him/her demands that you share the fullness of your sexuality with her/him. Then pick one turn-on for the two of you to experiment with—lingerie, toys, dominance and submission, pee, role-playing—whatever your hearts desire.

Decide on a safe-word, an out-of-context word your partner can use if the experiment is heading in an uncomfortable direction. For example, if the dildo is too big or the lipstick is too red, s/he could say “pickles.” The safe-word, when uttered in the scenario, will let you know that you need to change direction or slow down without completely destroying the built-up sexual energy.

If this initiation process doesn’t work, Dr. Dick suggests that you cut your losses and dump the white bread. Go out and find yourself a kindred spirit, someone you won’t have to apologize to for being creative in your sex play. Because, as we all know, the key to fantastic sex is all about communicating – and if you can’t be honest about what you want, then it won’t be long until you’re looking around, wondering how the hell you got to a sex life full of furtive, 2 minute, missionary position encounters. And life is way too short for that crap.

Sex EDGE-U-cation with Claire Adams — Podcast #153 — 09/16/09

Hey sex fans,

As I mentioned at the beginning of Monday’s podcast, over the next two weeks, and on both Mondays and Wednesdays, I will be featuring two absolutely amazing women in my podcasts.  Both of these very talented women are taking a lead role in helping change our society’s perception of female sexuality and the gift of physical beauty.  And each is doing it from what might, at first glance, appear to be the polar opposite of the other.  But I MsAdamsBiobelieve appearances can be deceiving.

On Monday I introduced you to the ultimate photographer of the female nude, Leanne Bell, as part of The Erotic Mind series.  Today, as part of my Sex EDGE-U-cation series, I have the pleasure of welcoming the internationally renowned teacher, BDSM advocate and on camera performer, Pro-Dom, pro-sub, bondage master, and video director, Claire Adams.  She’s here to share something of her amazing life with us.

Both of my guests are extraordinarily passionate women who are completely immersed in their work.  And their fervor is infused by a philosophy of empowerment and the beauty of women as full-fledged sexual beings.  These podcasts are not to be missed!

Claire and I discuss:

  • Her real life as a rope bottom, submissive and slave.
  • ClaireBondage.com — a unique mix of porn and BDSM.
  • Bondage games and predicament bondage.
  • Being a collared sub,
  • RACK — Risk Aware Consensual Kink.
  • Claire the contortionist.
  • How se began her life in kink.
  • Damon & Claire, purveyors of high quality rope kits.
  • Her life as a Pro-Dom and her ability to switch between Dom and sub roles.

For more of Claire visit her on one of her professional sites: clairebondage.com, petitekink.com Or her rope site vintagerope.com and her Master, Damon Pierce’s site: slavetobondage.com.

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for all my podcasts on iTunes.  You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Eden Fantasys.com.

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More Sex EDGE-U-cation with Lady HotchKiss – Podcast #148 – 08/26/09

Hey sex fans,

We’re back with that delicious Georgia peach, Lady HotchKiss, for more of her unique Sex EDGE-U-cation.  In this series of podcasts we are looking at the world of fetish sex, kink and alternative sexual lifestyles.  But you know that already, huh?Attitude

Did you somehow miss last week’s show?  That’s a pity!  Because Lady HotchKiss spilled the beans about her life with her two slaves.  Does that peak your interest?  I thought it would.  You’ll find last week’s podcast by using my site’s search function in the sidebar.  Type in Podcast #146, but be sure to include the #sign.

I’m so lovin this conversation, because Lady HotchKiss is bendin’ my mind big time. This week we shift gears a bit; Lady HotchKiss takes us on a little tour of her Pro-Dom life.  We get way more eye-opening chat and loads of laughs too.  You don’t want to miss a moment of this.

Lady HotchKiss and I discuss:

  • Pro-Dom activities —
  • ——Interrogation  to medical play; tickling to slave training.
  • BDSM etiquette and protocols.
  • Sexuality/Genitality/Power play.
  • Tips for the novice kinkster.
  • What newbies need to know.
  • Care to “munch”?
  • The need for kink-positive healing and  helping professionals.

Be sure to visit Lady HotchKiss at her websites HERE and HERE!

See a slideshow of the fabulous Lady HotchKiss at work and play.

Click on the thumbnails below.

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BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Check out The Lick-A-Dee-Split Connection. That’s Dr Dick’s toll free podcast voicemail HOTLINE. Don’t worry people; no one will personally answer the phone. Your message goes directly to voicemail.

Got a question or a comment? Wanna rant or rave? Or maybe you’d just like to talk dirty for a minute or two. Why not get it off your chest! Give Dr Dick a call at (866) 422-5680.

DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Look for all my podcasts on iTunes.  You’ll find me in the podcast section, obviously. Just search for Dr Dick Sex Advice. And don’t forget to subscribe. I wouldn’t want you to miss even one episode.

Today’s podcast is bought to you by: Eden Fantasys.

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I’m Shocked! —— Part 2

Look for my new

Product Reviews!

REVIEW #23

Hey sex fans,

We’re back with Part 2 in this series that will focus on the exceptional products from the pervy and oh so edgy folks at Paradise Electro Stimulations, PES.

Last week, as you recall, the Dr Dick Review Crew and I introduced you to the concept of Erotic Electro Stimulation in general and the PES Power Box in particular.  If you somehow missed this important first part of our presentation, look for Review #22.

This week the Review Crew will introduce you to some of the PES Electrodes that attach to the PES Power Box.  These are the thingies and that actually deliver the stimulation.  You’ll notice that some of these products are gender specific, others are can be used by either sex.

This week’s Review Crew include:

  • Glenn & Hank — Reviews #4, 16, 17, 18
  • Gina & Kevin — Reviews #4, 13, 16, 17, 18
  • Joy & Dixie— Reviews #6, 12, 16, 17, 18

Joy & Dixie introduce us to the newly redesigned PES Vaginal Plug.  It directs the flow of Erotic Electro Stimulating current right inside your pussy.  You lucky Ladies!  All us pussy-less folk can only guess at the bliss we’re missing.  By the way, neither Joy nor Dixie had ever played with Erotic Electro Stimulation before.

Look for full review HERE

Glenn & Hank introduce us to the PES Acrylic Anal Plug.  It directs the flow of Erotic Electro Stimulating current right inside your ass.  Since we all have an asshole, none of us will be left wondering what we’re missing, just because we don’t have the right parts.  Hank and Glenn have a limited amount of experience with e-stim.  They use Electro Stimulation as part of their BDSM play.

Look for full review HERE

Hank & Glenn introduce us to the PES Corona Stimulator.  It’s one three corona focused PES Electrodes that target the Erotic Electro Stimulation to a your cockhead.  Pity the dick-less among us who’ll never know the ecstasy of this kind of erotic charge.

Look for full review HERE

Gina & Kevin introduce us to the PES Electro-Flex Anal Plug.  It directs the flow of Erotic Electro Stimulating current right inside your ass. Again, since we all have an asshole, none of us have to miss out on all the fun just because we don’t have the right parts.  Kevin and Gina are e-stim virgins.

Look for full review HERE

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