Category Archives: Hypersensitivity

Help! It hurts when I do this.

Name: Dylan
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Location: Australia
Hi Dr Dick, I’ve got a painful and irritating problem that my GP wasn’t able to help with, so I’m hoping you can. After I spend time edging, or develop blueballs, I get an intense burning sensation in my urethra. It usually doesn’t happen until after I cum, then urinate, but occasionally it’ll happen while edging. If I sit on the toilet and push as though urinating, it calms down significantly, but returns when I stand up. It usually goes after about half an hour of. I had a STI check (Urethral Swab. Oww. No sounding for me thanks) and it came back all clean, and in all other respects my junk is normal. Any ideas about what’s going on, or how I can fix it? Thanks!

This reminds me of the old joke where a guy goes to see his doctor about a pain he is having. The doctor sits him down and asks him where it hurts. The guy says, “It hurts when I do this.” And he takes his hand, makes a fist and punches himself in the side of the head. The doctor nods knowingly and says, “Stop doing that, and I guarantee the pain will subside.”

give up dickListen Dylan, whatever the root cause of the burning sensation you report is — and I can honestly say you have me stumped there — I pretty much can guarantee that it will subside if you cease the edging you are doing, or at least cut way back on that.

Like I said, I’ve never encountered this particular phenomenon before, so I can’t advise you further. And if your GP couldn’t put his finger on it, so to speak, and the burning sensation only happens when you edge or practice orgasm denial, then simply stop doing that and things will get better. I promise. After all, it’s not like you can’t live without edging. If, on the other hand, you said that you had discomfort every time you had an erection, then there’d be cause for alarm. But if the owie is only associated with something self-induced, then that’s a horse of a different color. See what I mean?

And here’s a tip: if you’re doing something that is causing pain or discomfort — and that’s not your intention — then your body is sending you a message that whatever you are doing it’s too much or it’s unhealthy. I am of the mind that we all ought to listen more closely to the messages our body sends us about what it needs and what it doesn’t need.

Oh, and for those in my audience who don’t know what the fuck “edging” is, it’s a stop/start masturbation technique designed to prolong the time it takes a guy to reach his climax. An edger will begin to wank like normal, but when he gets near to cumming — he stops stroking, sometimes even squeezing his cock till the urge to shoot subsides. Once the urge to cum quiets down, he begins to stroke again. Stopping again whenever he approaches climax. He repeats this whole ‘stop and start’ cycle for as many times as he would like, so that when he finally shoots he’ll have a stronger orgasm and he’ll spew more spunk.edging

I know a lot of men who edge and they swear by it. I also know that a number of these men are doing themselves a disservice, even harm, because they are practicing an extreme version of edging. In the end, despite the stand-up nature of our dick, it is a very delicate instrument. Intense edging, especially accompanied by nasty squeezing or slapping to quell the building ejaculation can be injurious.

So maybe, Dylan, just maybe ya oughta take a break from edging for a while and see if this burning issue doesn’t resolve itself.

Good luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Try as I might…

Name: Dan
Gender: Male
Age: 48
Location: Montreal
I’m a late forties year old man who has lived numerous sexual experience in the past, until I met just in the beginning of this past year a wonderful interesting, woman with all the qualities and values that I needed. We started our first sexual experience a few months ago, April. The result was quite a disaster. I wasn’t able to do any penetration on her. She insisted that she has a blockage, and I had no idea about blockage and wanted to leave her place. Now I tried to understand her, but her problem has two factors that I’ve never came across with a woman. One is that if I fucked her she would get vaginitis. She doesn’t have any reaction when I fuck her. However, the scenario with her is the usual. She would get into her closet wear something very daring and sexy and give me a nice blowjob and …swallow. I would usually experience just straight penetration, in any position in my past experience with other women But would this mean that the sexy clothes and asking me if I would cum in her mouth, compensated for her inability to have my penis in her vagina? She asked me that I would have to eat her pussy often so she would feel something. The last time I did I was eating her pussy for two hours with a few breaks until she came. My question is can I take this any longer, and what is the connection with her vaginitis?

Hell, Dan, I don’t know if you can take this any longer or not. What’s clear to me is, things are pretty grim, not just for you but also for your lady friend.

Your story is a little difficult to follow. I’m gonna guess that English is not your first language, right? But here’s what I think you’re trying to say. You are a sexually experienced man in his forties. You’ve recently met an interesting woman that you like very much. Unfortunately, the sex sucks…and not in a good way.

Your friend experiences pain while fucking, but you don’t know why. She says there’s a blockage and tells you that intercourse will only lead to vaginitis, which is an inflammation of the vaginal mucosa and often associated with an irritation or an infection. While this is a pretty common problem, it should not be an every fucking time kinda problem…if you catch my drift. However, this little lady is happy to give you a hummer to make up for this. And just to show you there are no hard feelings — she’ll even swallow your spunk. Well, she’s a trooper that’s for sure! Unfortunately, avoiding the fucking issue won’t solve the mystery of why fucking is a real pain in the pussy.

The two most likely reasons for this painful fucking are: 1) the woman is not aroused enough before the fucking begins, or 2) there is an actual physical condition that might make fucking painful, even if she is aroused.

It’s easy enough to eliminate the second option; all your woman friend has to do is pay her gynecologist a little visit and have her doc take a quick look around. If there is indeed a blockage, as she says there is, a gynecological exam will discover it and end the debate.

That being said, I’d be willing to bet that, in your friend’s situation the first reason is the more likely culprit. This is often the case with pre-orgasmic women and your woman friend sounds like she may very well fall into that category. If your woman friend has lived all her adult life without having an orgasm, she will sure enough be conditioned not to expect one any time soon — either through fucking or by having you eat her out…even for hours. And hey, you’re a trooper too for doin’ that, darlin’!

I’d be willing to speculate that she’s not particularly informed about her own sexual response cycle. Thus she’s unable to provide you much direction on how to pleasure her without discomfort. A woman, particularly a preorgasmic one, must come to full arousal before her partner attempts penetration. A man, on the other hand, needs only to have a stiff dick. This obviously makes them (men) more ready and eager for the old in and out long before their female partner is ready and eager for the same. If you are guilty of this, and there’s a good chance that you are, your woman friend’s body will resist you, even if she desires to make a go of it.

Your woman friend could start getting over this by being better informed about her own sexual response cycle. If she doesn’t know what turns her crank, she can’t expect you to know what to do, even with all of your experience. Once she figures out how her body works, and this information will come best through masturbation, she’ll then be able to instruct you on the subtleties and points of interest of her particular pussy.

Touch is very important to most women, especially in the arousal stage of things. Often women will want to be touched and caressed all over, not just on the sexually charged spots of her body like her tits and pussy. She ought to take you on a little touch tour of her body. Literally, she could take you by the hand and touch herself with your fingers. She should show you the kind of touch she likes in the places she likes to be touched. You guys will need to take your time with this. I can pretty much guarantee you won’t get it the hang of this first time you try.

With her help you’re gonna be able to see her arousal build. She could encourage you to use your lips and mouth as well as your hands. If she’s not fully aroused, her pussy will be dry. But even if she is wet, you ought to use a nice personal lubricant to make her even more slippery and to facilitate penetration. I can’t overstate the necessity of lots and lots of lube.

If you guys follow these simple steps, you will have greater success with your fucking. Your woman friend will experience great pleasure and she will, in turn, be a fount of great pleasure for you. In the end, your woman friend must take the lead in this. She must get to know her own body first, so she can teach you about it next.

Finally, let me turn you on to a couple of great resources. Both are SEX WISDOM podcasts. I suggest that you and your woman friend listen to these shows together.  The first is an interview with author Mikaya Heart. Mikaya is the author of The Ultimate Guide To Orgasm For Women; How to Become Orgasmic For A Lifetime. It is by far the best book about women’s sexuality that I have read in the past decade, if not longer.

The second interview is with sexologist, Dr Shannon Chavez. She is one of the co-founders of the revolutionary SHE (Sexual Health Experts) Clinic in Arizona. Theirs is a comprehensive interdisciplinary treatment approach to female sexual health needs.

Good luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Know Thyself!

It’s 2006 people! The internet impacts on nearly every aspect of our lives. We have more immediate access to more specific information about every conceivable thing under the sun — an access and availability unparalleled in history. We have the collective knowledge of all humankind at our fingertips, both literally and figuratively. Despite this super-available wealth of information, many of us still live in the dark when it comes to our bodies and how they work. We are uninformed about our anatomy, unaware of the mechanics that make us tic, and oblivious to our own sexual response cycle. This sort of ignorance and estrangement leads to all sorts of troubles.

Hi Richard
I really only had my first male sexual encounter in September (which I enjoyed!). We tried oral. He was cut and I’m not. I didn’t enjoy receiving it though as the head my dick is sensitive to the point of being sore when the foreskin is pulled all the way back. I only do that in the shower when I’m cleaning down there. When I self-pleasure, I do it in a way that the foreskin never goes full back, just halfway. I’m not sure if this is a common problem with uncut men.
I do like the idea of anal sex and I’m looking for a patient top for my first time. But I’m just worried about the whole sensation and preparation, etc.
Wayne

Wow, Wayne, new to gay sex, huh? I’m glad to hear that you’re enjoying yourself. Yes,b4.jpg the prospects of fully enjoying your newfound sexual interests must hold great allure. Congratulations!

As to your issue of your hypersensitive dick head — let’s just say that’s part of the joy of having an uncut dick. Many uncut men report similar sensitivity, especially when they haven’t had a lot of partnered sex. Some of the discomfort will dissipate on its own with the more cock-play you have. However, you can also hasten the desensitization process by retracting your foreskin and leaving your unsheathed dick in your underwear for an hour or so at a time. You could also try masturbating with your foreskin completely retracted. This will, no doubt, feel a bit odd and perhaps even uncomfortable at first, but like I said, this will subside. The object of these exercises is to take the edge off, so to speak. You don’t need to concern yourself with thoughts of total desensitization — there’s no likelihood of that happening. But you do want to get to a point where you can enjoy some great head without worrying that you will be sore afterward. You might also want to encourage your cock sucking friends to be especially careful when they’re chowin’ down on your tender meat.

In anticipation of finding that patient top you seek; you can prepare yourself, and your asshole, for the enjoyment to come. During your own private sex play — masturbation — be sure to include your sphincter and prostate. Familiarize yourself with your whole hole-area. Use your fingers and/or a small dildo to test the waters, so to speak. Take your time and use lots of lube. Don’t be afraid to experiment and push the limits a bit. The more that you know about your own ass, the more you will be able to inform future partners on how best to pleasure you.

You might want to experiment with douches too. Over the counter stuff is ok, but a simple solution of warm water and a bit of vinegar or lemon juice works even better. It’s cheaper too. When it comes to fucking, a clean ass is a happy ass. Remember when you bottom, your anal hygiene is your responsibility. The more you know about anal health and hygiene, before you give up your ass for the first time, the more likely both you and your top will enjoy yourselves.

Good luck

Hi again Richard
I appreciate you taking time to answer my questions and for the advice you’ve given me. I still think an uncut cock is a curse though! LOL Each time I read your suggestion about rolling back my foreskin, I have to cross my legs. So I just need to get over that. :-)
I will try a dildo and some lube for exploration. The nearest I have come so far is to try a finger wrapped in tissue paper. The reason this worried me was because even after a BM, sometimes it caused gas to be released and once or twice even “forced” another movement.
When being topped, does the cock go past the “squishy” muscle that I can feel with my finger? And how would one apply a water and lemon juice solution?
Wayne

Hello again, Wayne,

l1.jpgYou’ll never convince me that an uncut dick is a liability. I firmly believe that, in most circumstances, body parts are best left in their natural state.

Learning to care for an uncut dick is something else indeed. There are plenty of resources on the internet for uncut men like you. I suggest doing a search with word strings like: Sex Information or Health Information and Uncircumcised. You’ll be pleasantly surprised with the wealth of information available.

One word of caution, have your wits about you when reading through the information you find on the net. For example, you will probably notice that the American medical industry has a very strong bias toward circumcision. For some reason, our culture would prefer to mutilate a cock instead of teaching the cock’s owner, be it boy-child or grown-up man, how to care for and clean his pecker in its natural state.

Wait a minute; you’re wrapping your finger in toilet paper before sticking it in you ass? That can’t be fun or comfortable. Listen, partner, your ass is your friend, it’s the source of loads of pleasure. Shit also comes out of your ass, but it’s not the end of the world if you get a bit of it on your finger during exploration. It’s soap-and-water soluble, ya know. Rootin’ around in your bum or someone else’s bum can and often does produce some interesting byproduct. No surprise there, it’s an asshole after all.

Washing your hands after butt play, as well as keeping them away from your mouth until they are washed, will help keep things sanitary. May I suggest you get a copy of: Anal Pleasure and Health: A Guide for Men and Women by Jack Morin, Ph.D. It’s an excellent primer for the anal novice. You can find it online.

My, you are uninformed about your own anatomy. The squishy muscle you speak of is your sphincter muscle. And yes, one would hope that a top’s dick would go past that muscle to at least the depth where his cock can stimulate your prostate. Unclear on where your prostate is? You’ll find plenty of information online about that too. Do a search with word strings like: Prostate and Health Information and Anatomy.

Here’s some more homework for you. Do and internet search using the words: Anal Douche. You will find all the information you need about the care and cleaning of your asshole. You’ll also find a vast array of implements designed for just this purpose. Have a ball!

Good luck

Dr. Dick,
Please help me. I am an attractive 21-year-old guy. I have no problems with meeting women nor do I have a low libido, the problem is that I suffer from hemorrhoids. This is really embarrassing as I don’t even let a girl touch my ass. And you know how girls like to play with a guy’s ass these days. I know there are cures for hemorrhoids, but none have worked and my doctor said it is useless to cure them because anal sex will cause their return. Please, please help…I am dying of frustration and fear.
Regards,
Jay

Dear Jay,

You are not alone. Many men and women suffer from hemorrhoids and, as you say, itfingerfuck02.jpg can be frustrating, even embarrassing. But there is hope.

The first thing you ought do is look for another physician. If you are accurately reporting your doctor’s comments about butt fucking and hemorrhoids then he’s got a problem. What he told you is simply not true. You needn’t live a life of frustration and fear just because you have an ass-phobic doctor.

Do an internet search with word strings like: Hemorrhoids and Health Information and Anal Sex.

It’s hard for me to imagine a case of hemorrhoids so bad that it couldn’t be helped or cured by one of the many new and sophisticated therapies and interventions currently available. And with regard to butt fucking, there are many people who would believe that light anal stimulation can actually help relieve and even prevent hemorrhoids from reoccurring.

So do yourself a favor. Get a second opinion, a third if necessary. Find a sex-positive doctor. You can even do an internet search for Sex Positive Doctors. Or you can get a referral from a local gay hotline. Or look for a proctologist at a local university hospital. You’re more likely to find an open-minded practitioner there.

Your current physician has given you very poor advice indeed. He has done you a great disservice. Don’t let him have the last word.

Good Luck,
dr. dick

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