Can You Have a Sex Life After Breast Cancer?

— Experts Say Yes.

With patience and treatment, you and your partner can rekindle your sexual spark.

You may find yourself facing physical changes and emotional challenges, but you can overcome them.

By Abby McCoy, RN

If you’ve recently gone through lifesaving breast cancer treatment, you may be looking forward to better days ahead. But as you try to get back to “normal life,” you might notice a change in your libido.

“Cancer treatment across the board can take a significant toll on the body, and breast cancer is no different,” says Gabriel Cartagena, PhD, a clinical psychologist at Smilow Cancer Hospital at Yale New Haven and an assistant professor at Yale School of Medicine in New Haven, Connecticut.

About 60 to 70 percent of breast cancer survivors report sexuality issues after treatment, according to a study published in 2019 in Breast Cancer, so if you’re having that experience, know that many other women are, too. We asked the experts and have some treatments and tips to help you fire up your sex life after breast cancer.

How Breast Cancer Affects Your Libido

So you can understand how to combat a low libido after breast cancer treatment and take back your sexuality, let’s look at the causes.

Premature Menopause

Several cancer therapies can lead to premature menopause, according to a study published in 2022 in the Journal of Clinical Medicine. Chemotherapy and radiation therapy, for example, can decrease hormone levels in your body and make your menstrual cycle slow down or stop altogether, says Mary Jane Minkin, MD, a codirector of the sexuality, intimacy, and menopause program for cancer survivors at Yale Cancer Center and Smilow Cancer Hospital. For women whose breast cancer is fueled by estrogen, treatment may include medication to block the production of estrogen, or surgical removal of the ovaries. These measures, too, can bring on premature menopause. With menopause symptoms like hot flashes, insomnia, and dry mouth, sex may be the last thing on your mind.

Emotional Distress

A breast cancer diagnosis comes with a lot of emotions. Women diagnosed with breast cancer can be at a higher risk for mental health issues like depression and anxiety, neither of which are conducive to a high libido, according to a study published in 2021.

Vaginal Dryness

When your estrogen takes a nosedive during and after treatment, your vagina can become very dry, says Dr. Minkin. Lack of lubrication in this area can make sex uncomfortable or even painful, according to the American Cancer Society (ACS).

Painful Sex

Painful sex can also arise from pelvic floor dysfunction, which means the muscles in and around your pelvis can be too tight or too loose. That’s according to the research published in the Journal of Clinical Medicine, which also found that women may experience chronic pelvic pain syndrome (unexplained pain in your pelvis) after breast cancer treatment.

Body Changes

If you have had surgery or other body changes during treatment, such as removal or reconstruction of one or both breasts, you may not feel like revealing the new you in a sexual encounter, and new or missing sensations can make it hard to get in the mood. “Many women who have lost breast tissue, particularly if they have lost nipples, may feel [less] sensation in their breasts, and many women find breast stimulation important for sex,” says Minkin.

How to Get Your Groove Back

This list may feel discouraging to read, but you shouldn’t lose hope. “The important thing is that we can help with most of these issues,” says Minkin.

Medications Minkin recommends nonhormonal (estrogen-free) medications to help with symptoms of early menopause. “An over-the-counter herbal product called Ristela can help improve pelvic blood flow and enhance libido,” Minkin says. One meta-analysis published in 2021 found that women who took Ristela and similar products that contain the amino acid L-arginine experienced more sexual arousal, better lubrication, more frequent orgasms, and less discomfort or pain. Many participants reported no side effects at all, but a few experienced an upset stomach, heavier menstrual bleeding, and headache.

“Women can also consult with their providers about using prescription nonhormonal medications called flibanserin (Addyi) or bremelanotide (Vyleesi),” Minkin says. Addyi may be less effective than other options, and can cause fatigue and drowsiness, according to a meta-analysis published in 2022 in Sexual Medicine. Vyleesi, on the other hand, has shown more promise, according to a study published in 2019, with uncommon mild side effects like nausea, flushing, and headaches.

If your low libido stems from feelings of depression or anxiety, medications, often in combination with psychotherapy, are an option you can discuss with your healthcare provider.

Vaginal moisturizers For vaginal dryness, Minkin often suggests over-the-counter nonhormonal vaginal moisturizers, like Replens and Revaree, which are inserted into the vagina with an applicator a few times a week. “[These] work very nicely for many women,” Minkin says.

Toys A vibrator or similar device could be a worthwhile investment. They can boost sensation and increase blood flow to your pelvis, says Minkin, both of which can amplify desire.

Therapy One or more sessions with a counselor can be helpful, says Minkin. Sexual health counselors often use cognitive behavioral techniques to discover the “why” behind your low libido, and help you unlock thought patterns that may be blocking your sexual drive, according to a study published in 2020. Therapy is also an effective treatment for depression and anxiety.

Vaginal hormones Hormone replacement therapy is often used to treat menopause symptoms. But if you’ve had breast cancer, it may increase the risk that it will come back, especially if your cancer is sensitive to hormones. With vaginal hormonal treatments, a cream, tablet, or ring containing low-dose estrogen is placed directly in your vagina to aid lubrication and strengthen the vaginal lining. Because much less estrogen gets into your bloodstream, this option is generally considered safe, according to the North American Menopause Society. Your healthcare provider can help you decide if hormone treatments are right for you.

Get Reacquainted With Your Body

Breast cancer treatment can leave you feeling like you’re living in a stranger’s body. “A stark change like a mastectomy can leave women feeling separated from themselves,” says Dr. Cartagena. But every woman can get to know and accept her new body.

Reintroduce Yourself Gradually

“The process to reknow your body takes time and begins in small steps,” says Cartagena, who suggests a first step could be to get dressed in the morning with the lights on. After a few days or weeks of this, you might try spending 10 seconds observing your body in the mirror.

“Exposing yourself to your body little by little can allow you to gradually grieve what is different and take notice of what is new that is still important to you,” explains Cartagena.

Reframe Your Sexual Desires

Sex after cancer may look different, and mourning lost sensations is very important, says Cartagena. Looking forward, he encourages breast cancer survivors to study what sex means to them by asking questions like, “What feels good now?”

“If penetrative sex still evokes pain, a patient can explore foreplay, different forms of stimulation, or other forms of intimacy to induce different, fulfilling sensations,” says Cartegena. Sex doesn’t have to mean one thing — it can be whatever you need or want it to be.

Complete Article HERE!

5 Ways to Have Healthy Sex When You Have Diabetes

— Here’s how to continue enjoying intimacy

By Mauricio González

Age and the passage of time usher in many changes. But in all my years practicing medicine, one thing remains a constant: My patients want to continue having a fulfilling and pleasurable sex life, even if they’re dealing with health problems or chronic illness. One disease that can take a heavy toll on a couple’s sex life is diabetes. Fortunately, there are ways to manage it and reignite your sex drive. Don’t despair! Here’s how you can do it.

The role of glucose in your sex life

People with diabetes are more prone to sexual dysfunction than the rest of the population, according to the American Diabetes Association (ADA). Both men and women may experience little or no sex drive due to poor management of their diabetes. But only 47 percent of men and 19 percent of women with diabetes discuss this issue with their doctors, according to a study published by Diabetes Care. Controlling blood sugar levels with medication and regularly monitoring these levels is essential to maintaining a healthy sex life.

But even if blood sugar is kept under control, men and women with diabetes may feel sexual desire but have difficulty becoming physically aroused.

And a failure to control blood sugar will eventually lead to blood vessel and nerve damage, which can prevent arousal.

How does diabetes affect your sex life?

There are many reasons why people with diabetes lose their sex drive or their ability to orgasm. Obesity, high blood pressure, sleep apnea and depression are conditions that often accompany diabetes and can compromise your libido. Some of the medications used to treat these conditions can also adversely affect your sex life. Some treatments for high blood pressure, for instance, can cause erectile dysfunction.

According to a study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, the sexual disorders of patients with type 1 diabetes are directly linked to depression and are less severe in those who accept their diabetes. These disorders also affect men more than women, and they take a greater toll on patients with blood glucose levels above 6.5 percent.

Erectile dysfunction in men with diabetes

If a man’s blood vessels don’t function properly or he has a blocked artery, his penis will not receive enough blood flow to get an erection. Men over 50 with type 2 diabetes are 11 times more likely to experience erectile dysfunction than younger men, according to a study published in the Caspian Journal of Internal Medicine.

Men with diabetes-related erectile dysfunction are also at greater risk of developing Peyronie’s disease, where a type of scar tissue known as plaque forms under the skin of the penis. This causes a curvature that can make erections painful, difficult or impossible.

Sexual problems in women with diabetes

Nerve damage in women can cause vaginal dryness, a condition that is not unique to people with diabetes but, according to the ADA, is twice as common in this population. The neurovascular system plays a necessary role in arousal and orgasm. If the small nerves aren’t working properly due to damage from poorly controlled blood sugar, a woman can have sensation problems. The clitoris needs optimal blood flow and sensation to become engorged enough to achieve orgasm.

Women with diabetes are also at greater risk of urinary tract and vaginal infections, which can make sexual intercourse painful and unpleasurable. Middle-aged women with diabetes who take insulin are 80 percent more likely to have difficulty reaching orgasm than women without diabetes, according to a study published in Obstetrics & Gynecology.

How can you maintain a healthy sex life?

Here are some practical suggestions that anyone can follow:

1. Eat right

Eating healthy can make all the difference. Non-starchy vegetables, such as broccoli and carrots, and whole grains can help stabilize your blood sugar and give you the energy you need to have sex. These foods are also rich in fiber and nourish your gut microbiome — the bacteria and other organisms that keep your gut healthy. A snack before sex will help boost your stamina and keep your blood sugar under control.

2. Exercise

Sex, like any other form of exercise, requires energy. So how can you be prepared? Activities such as weightlifting and Zumba classes can help you build stamina and have more energy in bed. I recommend at least 150 minutes of exercise per week, which can include walking, swimming or even gardening. Exercise also makes the body more sensitive to insulin, which helps it control insulin levels more efficiently.

3. Take your medications

Strictly follow your doctor’s instructions and make sure you take your medications. If you have diabetes, controlling your blood sugar starts with taking your prescriptions. Talk with your doctor if you suspect that a medication prescribed to treat other conditions may be interfering with your sex life, so that you can work together to look for alternatives. I also recommend buying a weekly pill organizer, which has been shown to help increase compliance with medical treatment.

4. Manage stress

Learning that you have diabetes can be upsetting and can affect your mental health. Learn how to calm your mind and body in stressful moments, such as during a sexual encounter. Brush away negative thoughts. Be grateful for — and focus on — enjoyable moments. Meditation can be very helpful. Research shows that meditation may strengthen the parts of the brain that help you remain calmer in stressful situations. But my favorite tool for reducing stress and anxiety is cognitive behavioral therapy; check with your doctor to see if this is a good option for you.

5. Be consistent

Consistency is a bridge between dreams and reality. Follow these suggestions daily. Take it gradually at first. Don’t reach for gimmicky or drastic solutions; just stick to the basics and you’ll get results, especially over time. Remember that the key is consistency, not perfection.

Complete Article HERE!

Sex after menopause doesn’t need to hurt

— Comprehensive review offers roadmap for doctors to evaluate, treat overlooked condition

  • Between 13% and 84% of postmenopausal women experience vaginal pain during sex
  • Causes of pain other than vaginal dryness are often undiagnosed and untreated
  • Pain during sex can harm relationships, self-esteem and contribute to depression, anxiety
  • Safe, effective therapies exist but condition is rarely evaluated or treated

Between 13% and 84% of postmenopausal women experience dyspareunia—vaginal pain during sex—but the condition is rarely evaluated or treated despite the availability of safe and effective therapies. With life expectancy increasing and the functional health of older adults improving, the identification and treatment of painful penetrative sex represents a great unmet need.

A new Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine comprehensive review of medical studies involving painful sex in post-menopausal women provides a roadmap for doctors to evaluate and treat the typically overlooked condition.

It is the only comprehensive review of its kind because it examines multiple reasons for the condition beyond just vaginal dryness due to lack of estrogen, such as post-hysterectomy problems, arthritis, cancer treatments and more.

“Post-menopausal women shouldn’t accept painful sex as their new norm,” said Dr. Lauren Streicher, clinical professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Feinberg. “Many women try over-the-counter lubricants but continue to have pain. They, and sometimes their health care professionals, are unaware that there are other, more effective treatments.

“In addition, women are increasingly treated by telemedicine and not examined. The cause of pain with penetration is assumed to be due to vaginal dryness when they may have another condition that has been undetected.”

The review was published last week in Menopause: The Journal of The North American Menopause Society.

Aside from the obvious negative aspects of enduring pain and the inability to have penetrative sex, the consequences of dyspareunia include negatively impacting relationships and self-esteem and can contribute to depression and anxiety. In addition, other sexual dysfunctions such as hypoactive desire disorder and orgasmic dysfunction are often consequences of pain with penetrative sex.

Causes of vaginal pain during sex

Post-menopausal vaginal pain is often specifically due to lack of estrogen, but there are other, usually undetected and untreated causes for inability to have penetrative sex, Streicher said. These include post-hysterectomy problems; cancer treatments (chemotherapy, radiation, surgery); lichen sclerosus (patchy, discolored, thin skin) and other vulvar conditions; pelvic-floor tension; arthritis and other musculoskeletal problems; pelvic organ prolapse; and sexually transmitted infections.

More than 30% of women over the age of 50 are single and potentially will have a new sexual partner, Streicher added.

“Sexuality in women after the age of 50 years is marginalized, and gynecologic care is not prioritized, valued or even recommended,” Streicher said.

Why aren’t women being evaluated, treated for the condition?

Despite available treatments, dyspareunia often goes undetected for a variety of reasons. First, most American women no longer see a gynecologist after going through menopause, Streicher said. Secondly, women often don’t discuss painful sex with their primary health care clinicians, and, when they do, most clinicians are not equipped to treat these problems because they haven’t been trained to properly evaluate or treat dyspareunia in this population. Third, sexual function is often a low priority in women with other serious medical problems.

In a 2004 survey of more than 1,000 midlife women, 98% had at least one sexual concern, but only 18% of physicians broached the topic. This is particularly true in postmenopausal women who are unaware that solutions are available and rarely seek care for this complaint.

It’s also difficult to pinpoint the exact prevalence of dyspareunia in post-menopausal women because studies on dyspareunia require women to have at least one sexual encounter the month before enrollment, and women with dyspareunia avoid sexual activity because of pain.

What can be done?

Doctors should broach the topic of dyspareunia with their patients using oral or written questionnaires, Streicher said. In addition to a thorough medical history and physical examination, various tools can be used as further assessments, including vaginal pH, vaginal dilators, imaging, vulvar biopsy, vulvoscopy and photography, the cotton swab test, sexually transmitted infection screening and vaginitis testing.

Some of the treatments discussed in the review include silicone lubricants, moisturizers, vaginal estrogen, ospemifene, dehydroepiandrosterone, local testosterone therapy, cannabidiol and fractional CO2 laser treatments. In some cases, dyspareunia may need to be specifically addressed by pelvic floor physical or sex therapists.

Complete Article HERE!

10 Top Sex Ed Tips for Those 50 and Older

Making love is about more than intimacy. It’s good for your health, too

By Robin Westen

How sexy are your 50s?

If you think sex is the province of the young, you’re wrong. People in their 20s are having less sex now than ever before, studies show, so it’s possible that you’re as active, or more so, as the average millennial. About a third of us are getting busy several times a week, one survey found.

And most of us are still in the game: 91 percent of men and 86 percent of women in their 50s report being sexually active, although activity levels vary widely. So, there’s no “normal” amount of sex for people our age. What matters more is that you and your partner are happy with your sex life. Men and women age differently, and some studies indicate that sexual interest wanes differently as well. Combine that with emotional and physical issues, and it’s possible that you and your partner aren’t on the same wavelength when it comes to making waves.

The upsides, however, go way beyond our cravings for intimacy, pleasure and connection. Sex boosts our immune systems, improves self-esteem, decreases depression and anxiety, relieves pain, encourages sleep, reduces stress and increases heart health. (In one study, men who had sex at least twice a week were 50 percent less likely to die of heart disease than their less active peers were.) Another bonus: You burn more calories making love than by watching The Great British Baking Show.

Not only is there a lot of science around the subject of later-life lovemaking; there’s also a range of products and medicines that can help. Take these steps to revitalize your sex life.

1. Connect emotionally

Women are twice as likely as men to lose their enthusiasm for sex in long-term relationships, research shows. The problem isn’t always reduced estrogen; it could be an absence of emotional closeness. In these cases, try listening more, praising more and showing more kindness. Individual, couples and/or sex therapy can help as well. Look for a sex therapist certified by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists.

2. Address vaginal dryness

It’s one of the top impediments to sex among older women: 34 percent of women ages 57 to 59 experience dryness and discomfort during intercourse, one study found. For help, try over-the-counter remedies before and during sex, such as water-based lubricants (K-Y Jelly and Astroglide), oil-based lubes (olive, coconut and baby oils) and OTC moisturizers (Replens and Revaree). Use these a few times a week, even if you’re not having sex.

3. Emphasize foreplay

“Regardless of the level of dryness, every woman needs to be primed with foreplay before intercourse,” says Elizabeth Kavaler, M.D., a urologist-urogynecologist at Total Urology Care of New York. Another tip: Encourage a woman to orgasm first, which provides more moisture for intercourse and other penetration.

4. Don’t let ED keep you down

Half of men who are in their 50s experience erectile dysfunction (ED), and the gold standard for treatment is prescription meds. Safe, effective options include Viagra (which lasts for four to six hours), Levitra (four hours), Cialis (up to 18 hours) and Stendra (up to six hours).

For the minority of men who can’t rely on a pill, other choices include alprostadil (a drug that’s self-injected into the penis) and Muse (a suppository that slides into the penis). Vacuum pumps use suction to coax erections, and new treatments include platelet-rich plasma (PRP) therapy, which may regenerate nerves and improve blood circulation.

5. Don’t ignore other conditions

Any problem that affects overall health can interfere with sexual pleasure. “Cardiovascular issues such as high blood pressure, as well as diabetes, can negatively impact blood flow,” which isn’t good for sexual arousal, notes New York ob-gyn Alyssa Dweck, M.D., coauthor of The Complete A to Z for Your V. “And depression or anxiety can reduce the desire or ability to have sex.” The problem? Medicines that treat these conditions may also affect sexual desire and response. Speak with your health care provider about side effects and possibly switching meds or adjusting the dosage or timing.

6. Consider estrogen

Women, if over-the-counter lubricants aren’t doing the trick, consider estrogen replacement therapy (ERT), which treats hot flashes and vaginal dryness. The most common delivery methods are creams and pills (you can self-apply Estrace and Premarin with an applicator or take these in pill form), insertable tablets (with Vagifem, you use an applicator to slide a tiny tablet into the vagina) and a ring (Estring, which your doctor inserts, or you can do this yourself; it needs to be replaced every three months). ERT is not recommended for anyone who has or had breast cancer, or for those who have recurrent or active endometrial cancer, abnormal vaginal bleeding, recurrent or active blood clots, or a history of stroke.

7. Think about lasers

A treatment called fractional laser therapy can help reduce vaginal dryness without estrogen. It works like this: A laser creates tiny superficial burns in the vaginal canal. As the area heals, this leads to fresher collagen development and increased blood supply, which makes the area more elastic and responsive, Kavaler explains. (She cautions against vaginal rejuvenation surgery, which is a cosmetic procedure: “It can reduce sensitivity in the area and can make orgasms even more difficult to achieve or, in some cases, sexual intercourse permanently painful.”)

8. Confront incontinence issues

In a national poll of more than 1,000 women, nearly half of those over age 50 reported bladder leakage during sex. The primary reason: Sexual stimulation puts pressure on the bladder and urethra. If you’re hoping to get lucky in the hours ahead, avoid consuming beverages or foods with caffeine, such as coffee and chocolate; caffeine stimulates the bladder and acts as a diuretic (citrus fruits and juices are diuretics, too). Men whose prostates have been removed can also experience incontinence during sex. This condition, known as climacturia, can be treated in a number of surgical and nonsurgical ways. Plus, medications such as Ditropan and Vesicare can decrease urination frequency.

9. Turn down testosterone

In late 2020, the American College of Physicians stated that testosterone replacement should no longer be administered to treat a lagging libido (testosterone can have serious side effects, including an increased risk of prostate abnormalities). Denver urologist David Sobel, M.D., offers three easy alternatives: “sleep, reducing stress, and — the big one — exercise.” Even better: Work out with your lover. Seventy-one percent of runners say that running as a couple plays a healthy role in their sex life, according to a 2021 survey according to a 2021 survey.

10. Overcome arthritis aches

About 58 million Americans have arthritis, and over half are younger than 65, reports the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Arthritis can limit your ability to engage in sex. In addition, an empathetic partner may resist sex to avoid creating discomfort. An option: Ask your partner to experiment with more comfortable positions. Also, time sex for when you feel best (rheumatoid arthritis pain is usually more acute in the morning), the Arthritis Foundation advises. Taking a warm bath, alone or together, can help relax joints before making love. If the pain is severe, try an OTC medicine such as ibuprofen before having sex, or speak with your doctor about prescription medications.

Complete Article HERE!

Why does sex hurt?

14 common reasons why intercourse is painful, plus how to prevent it

By

So, why does sex hurt? Good question – and, sadly, not one that there’s a straightforward answer too.

Getting intimate and then feeling a stabbing, burning or, well, any kind of pain down there can be a bit of a mood killer, can’t it? Not to mention a worry.

Sex can hurt for a number of reasons, from underlying infections to hidden health conditions. That highlighted, it’s definitely better to deal with it sooner rather than later – no point gritting your teeth and hoping it will go away.

Known medically as dyspareunia, as obstetrician, gynaecologist and ambassador for Wellbeing Sisters doctor Larisa Corda explains, painful sex affects one in ten British women, as per an International Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology study.

And, according to doctor Shree Datta, gynaecologist for intimate wellbeing brand INTIMINA, there are two main types. Superficial dyspareunia – pain at the entrance to the vagina or within it at the point of penetration – or deep dyspareunia – which occurs deep in the pelvis. “Remember that pain can range from a mild irritation to debilitating pain, meaning sex can’t be tolerated, and it may be temporary, intermittent or a long term problem,” she explains.

Both female experts stress that it’s important to discover it sooner rather than later why you may be suffering from pain during sex. Keep reading to decode why does sex hurt, once and for all.

1. Too little lubrication

FYI, one of the most common reasons you’re having to Google, ‘why does sex hurt?’, is because you have too little vaginal lubrication during sex. This is totally normal – a lot of women experience vaginal dryness.

Your vagina lacking moisture can be down to the amount of foreplay before penetration, or even a lack of hormones such as oestrogen around the time of menopause, explains Datta. “If you suffer from medical conditions such as diabetes or depression, this can also affect your sexual libido and enjoyment,” she shares.

Bottom line: many women simply do not produce enough vaginal lubrication, including younger women, adds Samantha Evans, sexual health expert, former nurse and co founder of luxury sex toy retailer Jo Divine.

Try this: Rather than keep Googling why does sex hurt, Evans shares that the use of lubricants can really help. Often GPs will prescribe a hormonal cream or pessary, but many gynaecologists advocate using vaginal lubricants to help nourish the delicate tissues of the vagina. Read out guide to the best lubes to buy over the counter, while you’re here.

2. You may be suffering from a skin condition

Did you know? Underlying skin conditions can actually cause irritation during sex, and condoms may also cause discomfort or burning, particularly if you have an allergy, explains Datta. If your vagina burns after sex, you may have eczema and other genital skin conditions, such as lichen sclerosis.

Try this: Make sure you visit your GP to get your skin condition defined, if you think you may be suffering. From there, they can help you decide the best course of action, explains Corda.

3. You may have vaginismus

Ever heard of vaginismus? If you haven’t, it’s the tightening of your vaginal muscles automatically at the time of penetration, explains Datta. But why does this happen? “It can be caused by a combination of physical and psychological issues,” explains Corda. “Physical causes can include urinary tract infections, sexually transmitted diseases, vulvodynia, skin conditions such as psoriasis or eczema, menopause, and birth trauma.”

Psychological problems, on the other hand, can be caused by emotional or sexual trauma. “A previous painful experience with sex might make it harder to feel aroused and enjoy touch,” explains a spokesperson from Brook Advisory. “It can also make the muscles around the vagina and anus clench (to protect you from the pain you’re worried about) and make penetration difficult and more painful.”

Try this: With the appropriate medical intervention and counselling, the experts share that the problem can be alleviated to enable penetrative sex. Treatment usually involves specialist counselling, pelvic floor exercises, biofeedback training with a women’s health physiotherapist and use of medical dilators or a vibrator or dildo to slowly encourage the vagina to relax and open.

4. You may have an STD

Pain during or after sex can also be a sign of a sexually transmitted disease (STI) or vaginal infection, like a urinary tract infection like cystitis.

“Stinging or burning during sex may be as a result of a sexually transmitted infection, especially if you also experience an unusual vaginal discharge, or an unusual odour,” says Professor Ellis Downes, consultant obstetrician and gynaecologist and spokesperson for vSculpt. “If you have a new sexual partner and have had unprotected sex with him, and are experiencing these symptoms it would be a good idea to have it diagnosed and treated by your GP or at a sexual health clinic.”

Try this: STIs such as Chlamydia or gonorrhoea can have little to no symptoms but vaginal itching or burning, as well as painful sex, might be a sign that you are infected. Visit your GP or GUM clinic for a test. Treatments usually involve antibiotics but your doctor can recommend the next course of action.

5. You might have thrush

Three out of four women will suffer with thrush at some point in their lives, although it’s other infections, such as bacterial vaginosis. As above, UTI’s are also a common reason as to why sex is likely to hurt. Vaginal thrush, in particular, is a common yeast infection, and the main symptoms include painful sex, itching, soreness, stinging, burning when peeing and an odourless discharge.

Try this: You can pick up a DIY test in most pharmacies to determine whether you have thrush or BV, and your pharmacist will be able to recommend the best course of action. It’s usually treated with anti-fungal cream, pessaries, pills or a combination.

6. You could be going through the menopause

According to Corda, during the menopause, women experience a reduction in sex hormones which can lead to both vaginal dryness and sexual pain.

Do note here: Don’t feel embarrassed about this or suffer in silence – as Datta points out, lots of people experience sexual problems at different stages of life. “There is a lot of help out there, so there is no need to deal with this difficulty alone,” she shares. Do book an appointment with your GP if you think your painful sex may be because of menopausal symptoms.

7. Your vagina may be irritated

You’ll likely know that genital irritation can be caused by spermicides, latex or vaginal douching. Some women are allergic to certain products or even their partner’s sperm. Latex products, such as condoms or sex toys, can also cause an allergic reaction, so if you’ve ever experienced an itching or burning sensation when trying new products, then you might’ve had an irritation or allergic reaction which can, in turn, lead to painful sex.

Try this: do be aware of what you are applying to the delicate skin of your genitals. Glycerin – which is often found in flavoured lubes – as well as parabens and aspartame, can cause irritation. Similarly, alkali or acidic lubes can mess with the pH balance of your vagina and cause dryness and itching. Instead, switch to a water-based (not silicon-based) lube, such as Pjur. Another alternative is Sliquid, which is also glycerin- and paraben-free.

Similarly, opt for latex-free condoms and, when using a sex toy, make sure you clean if after use (read how to clean your sex toys, here), recommends Downes. “Some cleaning substances can irritate the vaginal lining, though, so do note that it’s best just to use hot water and natural soap.”

8. You may just not be aroused

“If you’re not physically aroused, touch of any kind can be uncomfortable, especially if it’s somewhere sensitive, like your clitoris or the tip of your penis,” says a spokesperson from the Brook Advisory Clinic. “Being well-lubricated, relaxed and with lots of blood flow in the area (you want either an erect penis or a vulva swell) helps with this, so put plenty of focus on foreplay,” they recommend.

FYI, women especially need warming up before penetrative sex, both physically and emotionally. “If you’re not feeling turned on – that is, if you’re not mentally aroused – touch can be unpleasant. For example, being tickled when you’re feeling playful and silly is usually more fun than when you’re tired or angry,” adds the Brook spokesperson.

Try this: The sexpert suggests spending time enjoying foreplay to significantly improve your sexual pleasure. “There may be times when penetrative sex is not possible, but you can still have great sex without intercourse,” they share.

Corda also adds that, if you’re worried about your lack of libido, counselling could be key to treating these factors and reviving the pain associated with sex. But in the first instance, it’s important to see your doctor to rule out medical causes first and provide the correct treatment.

9. You may be injured

Did you know? “Painful sex can be a sign of damage from previous sex, such as tearing or soreness,” explains a spokesperson from the Brook Advisory Clinic.

Think about it – you wouldn’t go running if you’d twisted your ankle, so try not to have sex super quickly after a particularly enthusiastic session, as it may have resulted in friction that has left you sore.

10. He may be too big

“Even if you’re well lubricated and fully aroused, you may experience pain if a man inserts his penis too quickly or deeply,” says Evans. “The vagina relaxes as you warm up to having sex, and will open more comfortably if the penis enters slowly. Guiding your partner in at your own pace can really help avoid any pain.”

Try this: She explains that often, having sex doggy style can be painful, so try backing onto the penis at your own pace. The same can be said when going on top. Don’t let your partner to pull you down onto their penis if you suffer from painful sex: instead, she recommends slowly lower yourself, controlling the speed and depth of insertion that is comfortable. Got it?

11. You may have a female health condition like endometriosis

Painful sex is a common symptom for women with endometriosis symptoms, which affect two million women in the UK, making many avoid sex altogether. Up to 50% of women with endometriosis have cited painful intercourse, ranging from sharp, stabbing, needle-like pain to a deep ache. It can feel mild to intense, either during sexual intercourse or up to 24 to 48 hours post-coitally, or both.

As well as endometriosis (when the lining of the uterus grows outside the uterus or is thicker than normal), painful sex can also be caused by fibroids (growths of muscle and tissue inside the uterus) growing close to your vagina or cervix, irritable bowel syndrome and constipation.

Try this: Endometriosis – and its flare ups – are unpredictable, so often it feels like there’s no knowing when they may occur. Some women experience pain throughout the month whereas others only experience it at certain times, likely – but not definitely – related to their menstrual cycle. There is no cure for endometriosis but there are treatments that can help with the pain – do visit your doctor if you fear you may have it.

12. If you’ve just given birth, your vagina may be recovering

Wondering why does sex hurt after just giving birth? FYI, giving birth is a beautiful and emotional thing – but also an emotional and physical challenge, too, and you’ll need to take time to recover afterwards. “Childbirth is a formative experience for any woman, and for some it can be traumatic,” says Dr Becky Spelman, psychologist and We-Vibe‘s relationship expert. “Insensitive care practitioners or a difficult or dangerous birth can give rise to a heightened fear of birth, pregnancy, and even sexuality itself. Women who have experienced a traumatic birth often struggle to re-engage with their sexual selves, even when they have recovered physically, and can experience pain with no obvious physical cause,” she explains.

So why exactly is sex painful after giving birth? A number of reasons, from bruising to the vaginal wall is a common reason, explains Downes. “You may also have experienced a tear which will need time to heal completely before you have sex again – doctors recommend at least six weeks but it often takes longer,” she shares.

Why is sex painful? Woman with Legs Raised wearing white shorts lying on bed

13. Your relationship might be under strain

Arguing a lot or working through a stressful patch in your relationship? Ill feeling can actually totally cause painful sex, FYI – it’s a vicious cycle.

“Experiencing emotional pain as a result of conflict within your relationship could lead to painful sex,” says Evans. “Many couples go through an emotional disconnect if one of them is unable to have sex, which in turn can increase the pain levels, thus creating a vicious circle.”

Try this: The sexpert advises that consulting a couples’ counsellor or sex therapist may help – and remember, you are not alone.

14. You could have a hidden health condition

Often painful sex is a sign of a more unusual, difficult to diagnose health issue, explains Evans. Some of the lesser known conditions that could be causing you discomfort during sex include:

  • Lichen Schlerosus – a common condition generally affecting postmenopausal women thought to be linked to an overactive immune system.
  • Vestibulodynia – a condition that makes you feel a burning pain thought to affect 12-15% of women.
  • Vulvodynia – spontaneous burning without an itching sensation.

If you’re worried you have any of the above, do see a doctor.

Is painful sex normal?

Now you’ve read the expert answer to why does sex hurt, we’re sure you’re keen to know if pain during intercourse is actually common. Short answer: yes, but it’s important to see your doctor if sex is painful repeatedly. “It can stop you from enjoying sex or lead to you avoiding sex altogether,” shares Datta – which is not good.

“This can be isolating, affect your mood and cause distress,” she shares. “It could also cause problems in your relationship over time. You may be referred to see a Gynaecologist and we may need to examine and exclude both physical and psychological problems.

Bottom line: pain during sex can be down to a number of different causes. “That’s why sometimes a multi-disciplinary approach is needed to reach an adequate diagnosis and to offer appropriate support,” explains Corda. “This may include psychologists, urologists, gynaecologists, and even dermatologists.”

They’ll be able to allow you to explore the various issues affecting your ability to have or enjoy sex, and your relationship with your partner.

Complete Article HERE!

5 Fruits To Help Boost Vaginal Lubrication

By Rukweve Ochuko

The habit of eating fruits frequently can help to keep the body system normalised and healthy. Nutritionists report that certain fruits can help enhance the wellbeing of hormones in the human body, which in turn, caters to some organs. This includes the heart, eyes, liver and kidney, amongst others.

The vagina is not left out. Natural lubrication of the vagina is highly driven by the hormone oestrogen and functions as an important factor in both intimate intercourse and vaginal health.

However, the vagina is a self-protector and cleanser of its insides, which means the vagina is good at cleaning and protecting itself from external factors that can lead to vaginal dryness.

When the oestrogen levels of the female genital are low, it can result in making the vaginal tissue fragile, thin and dry, making sexual intercourse painful and less enjoyable.

The usage of lubricant products can help with vaginal dryness, but elements found in some lubricants can take away the natural moisture and make the dryness worse. Therefore, it is highly recommended to use lubes that enhance vaginal hydration.

Nonetheless, taking natural healthy measures to maintain vagina wellness is recommended.

Here are 5 fruits that can help achieve that

1. Apple

The vitamins in an apple helps to boost sexual pleasure in women. According to a study in 2014, stated by Healthline, women who ate an apple at least once a day had a better sex drive. The phytoestrogen Phoridzin found in apples is presumed to serve as an enhancer for better sex functionality, lubrication, arousal and ability to orgasm.

Scientist suggests that the compound phloridzin found inside an apple is like the female sex hormone oestradiol. This hormone plays a major role in sexual arousal.

Researchers from Santa Chiara Regional Hospital in Trento, Italy are of the opinion that the more apples a woman ingests, the higher the level of sexual function and lubrication, an evaluation which takes into account all-inclusive satisfaction with sex.

More so, an apple contains antioxidants which serve as an aid to stimulate blood flow to the vagina. This causes the body to experience intimate pleasure and finally orgasm.

2. Kiwi

Kiwi is a small fruit that has a truckload of flavour and health aids for the human body system. The green flesh is full of healthy nutrients such as; potassium, vitamin K, vitamin E, folate and vitamin C, which is a healthy element for the vagina.

Frequently, the vagina cleans itself from the inside through natural secretions, also known as discharge. The discharge helps to protect the vagina from external bacteria that can be detrimental to a woman’s sexual health.

Scientists also suggest that there are bacteria in the vagina there to help fight against infections and other harmful bacteria.

Kiwi fruit contains a high level of vitamin C and antioxidants that help to boost the good bacteria in the vagina to help keep it healthy and well lubricated.

3. Strawberry

Strawberry is one fruit that has always been associated with sexy. Although tasteless when eaten raw, it is tasty when processed as a flavour for pastries, milkshakes, juice or protein shakes.

Strawberries substance is not just good for the taste buds, but also good and healthy for the vagina. The seeds in a strawberry contain a high level of zinc, which helps to improve both sexes’ sexual lives in various ways.

High consumption of zinc causes a notable decrease in vaginal dryness, which helps to prepare a woman’s body for sex. Also, Strawberries has a high level of antioxidants which promotes sexual health and fertility, because both promote blood flow to the woman sex organs.

Compared to other fruits, a strawberry is low in calories and glycemic value, which means it helps to give sustained energy.

4. Avocado

Avocados serve as a good natural remedy for skin darkening, roughness and facial pimples. The substance helps to keep the skin glowing, soft and fresh. Notwithstanding the skin treatment it provides, the large consumption of avocados helps to prevent vaginal dryness.

Avocados are also filled with Vitamin E which is a major antioxidant that helps regulate the blood flow to the vagina. It is also rich in potassium and vitamin B6 which certain studies show can decrease premenstrual syndrome symptoms like; irritability, bloating and fatigue. This can help to boost a woman’s libido and energy during sexual intercourse.

5. Orange

Orange is one of the most popular fruits nationwide, it is filled with vitamin C, which is known to have various health benefits. This includes; preventing skin damage, lowering cholesterol, controlling blood sugar level, and keeping the vagina lubricated amongst other benefits.The high level of vitamin C in orange helps to stimulate wetness of the vaginal walls to help penetration during sexual intercourse easier. It provides the body with stamina, which means it can aid in lasting long during sexual intercourse. It keeps the sex drive going well, by eradicating the free radicals that slows down the normal energy level as regards sexual health.The vitamin C content in orange is at a high rate than any other citrus fruits. One orange provides 116.2 percent of the daily value of Vitamin C. So, one orange a day can help to keep your body system and sexual drive healthy. Oranges can be consumed in their raw form or juiced, depending on how you enjoy it the most.Vaginal dryness can lead to bruising of the vaginal walls, which can cause minimal bleeding and pain during sex or after sex. When the vagina experiences are such, it can be highly uncomfortable and decrease orgasm which according to scientific studies, helps to release hormones that can provide relief from stress, improve moods, and boost immunity. It is recommended to make fruits part of your daily consumption to stay healthy.

Complete Article HERE!

Everything You Need To Know About WAP

— Vaginal Dryness, and Arousal

By Jamie LeClaire

Over the summer, Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion blessed the world by dropping the sex-positive, empowering banger, “WAP.” The title is an acronym for “wet ass pussy,” and the song itself seeks to normalize and celebrate female-identifying people being unapologetically sexual and prioritizing their pleasure. And yet, a number of reactions revealed how little many know about sexual health, arousal, and how genitals function in relation to sex—especially vulvas and vaginas. Notably, conservative commenter and podcast host Ben Shapiro claimed WAP on its own to be a health concern, and—uh, according to pros that’s not the case.

The thing is, though, even though Shapiro may be deserving of the negative response he’s received for his false statement, his lack of knowledge about vulvar health is not something to be made fun of. Rather, it’s something to correct because sex education leads to more positive and shame-free conversations about sexual health. To continue contributing to that conversation, a doctor and sexual-health expert are here to answer some key questions: What does WAP mean? What does not having WAP mean? And, regardless, will you ever need a mop and a bucket?

What does WAP mean in terms of vaginal lubrication?

Vaginal fluid, especially during sexual arousal, is a normal and healthy component of sexual and reproductive functioning, and it can also fluctuate in its presence over the course of our lives. Vulva-owners have two sets of glands that are responsible for vaginal fluid during sexual arousal: the Bartholin’s glands, which are located to the right and left of the vaginal opening, and the Skene’s glands, which are closer to the urethra. Each produce and secrete what we know as vaginal fluid, and their functioning and physiology is heavily influenced by hormonal fluctuations that happen throughout life, like menopause.

As far as the whole “mop and a bucket” thing? Probably not necessary since the amount of lubrication likely wont accumulate beyond about a teaspoon’s worth.

In terms of function, vaginal lubrication aids in pleasure and the promotion of sexual health. According to Tamika K. Cross, MD, OB/GYN, these secretions help to minimize the possibility of micro tears and fissures from occurring inside the vaginal canal and around the vaginal opening during sexual play. “The less lubrication, the more friction, discomfort and potential trauma,” she says. But, as far as the whole “mop and a bucket” thing? Probably not necessary since the amount of lubrication likely wont accumulate beyond about a teaspoon’s worth.

Vaginal wetness does not always correlate with arousal

It’s important to note that differences between arousal and desire have implications on vaginal wetness, says Isharna Walsh, CEO and founder of sexual wellness app Coral. “They are closely interlinked, but they are not synonyms.” Arousal is the physical manifestation of sexual response and refers to physical reactions, like heart-rate increase, blood flow to the genitals, and, yes, WAP. But just because someone is physically aroused does not mean that they desire sex—desire is more of a mental experience and want.

It is absolutely possible for vaginal fluid to be present without feeling sexual desire, and it’s also possible to be turned on without any lubrication presenting. The descrepancy in these events is called arousal non-concordance, and Dr. Cross says it is a common issue. “The only way to find out if someone is both physically aroused and desires sex,” she says? “Ask them.”

Vaginal dryness can is extremely common and can happen for a number of reasons.

Research shows that around 17 percent of people with vulvas experience vaginal dryness during sex between ages 18 and 50, and around 50 percent of those who are post-menopausal. “Estrogen levels change most notably and drastically during menopause, thus vaginal dryness affects a large part of the population during that time,” says Dr. Cross. (As a reminder, hormonal fluctuations can account for shifts in the presence of vaginal fluid because of their effect on the functioning of our Bartholin’s and Skene’s glands.)

Beyond menopause, other factors that can shift hormone levels include the menstrual cycle, childbirth, stress, diet, medications, genital dysphoria, sleep deprivation, certain health conditions like PCOS and endometriosis, and more. For many people experiencing dryness, especially those who only experience discomfort during penetrative sex, investing in a quality personal lubricant can go a long way. But if your wetness is accompanied by vaginal itch, discomfort, or a new color or smell, it might be worth a visit to your doctor.

Ultimately, not all vulvas are the same, so getting to know your own and learning what’s normal and abnormal for you will help you to understand whether something is an issue that would benefit from addressing with a medical professional. And that’s true no matter where you land on the scale of 0 to WAP.

Complete Article HERE!

10 Things Your Vibrator Can Help With That You Wouldn’t Expect

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I’m officially dubbing 2020 the year of the vibrator.

They’re just having a bit of a moment, you know? I’m not talking about the created-from-jelly-latex, transparent pink, rabbit vibrators that many of us still think of when you read the word “vibrator.”

Nope — I’m talking about way more than just those. All kinds of vibrators: Bullet vibes, pendant vibes, wand vibes, penis vibes, dual stimulation vibes, g-spot vibes, vibrating plugs, vibrators that defy any definition other than “non-internal vibrator.”

The sex toy industry is growing faster than most of us can make room in our nightstands, but it’s not just because we’re talking about orgasm equality and sexual pleasure in a way that we never have before. It’s because sex toys (and first among them, vibrators) are touted as the remedy to everything from low self-esteem to insomnia, menstrual cramps to chronic dryness.

Vibrators are officially a wellness commodity.

That isn’t (necessarily) a bad thing. Orgasms are tied to all sorts of positive health outcomes, including more restful night’s sleep (thanks, prolactin) and pain relief (thanks to you, too, endorphins). Orgasms have more benefits than we currently even know, and if most people with clitorises are only having orgasms when their clits are stimulated, it stands to reason that we’re going to turn to tools (like vibrators) to help out.

Globally, the sex toy market is predicted to grow by 9.92 billion USD by 2023. A big contributor to that growth is a shift in our belief system from “sex toys are dirty” to “sex toys are healthy” and toy companies are investing heavily in that messaging.

So, here are 10 of the benefits that I’ve seen sex toy companies advertise — and if vibrators actually can help with them in a meaningful way.

Insomnia 

There are nights where you’re happy to be up until dawn and then there are the nights where you’re asking yourself “how the hell did I get here?” If you find yourself in that second group more often than not, you might experience insomnia, a sleep disorder characterized by the inability to fall (or stay) asleep.

Orgasms lower your level of cortisol (a hormone related to stress) and also release prolactin. The combination of the two hormonal shifts can help you feel much more relaxed, which in turn can actually help you fall asleep and actually stay asleep.

The verdict: Yes, as long as you’re having orgasms with your vibrator, it can help you with sleep.

The caveat: If you control your vibrator using an app on your cellphone, the blue light’s waking influence on your brain may counteract the drowsiness brought on by your cuddly hormones.

Chronic Dryness

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? (The answer is always ‘no one cares’, btw). Chronic vaginal dryness is uncomfortable AF, and it’s not something that just affects people going through menopause.

You might experience chronic vaginal dryness if you’re taking antidepressants or allergy medication, as a result of chronic yeast infections or using harsh soaps on your vulva, if you’re taking hormonal birth control or are on testosterone therapy, if you’re simply dehydrated, or…for a lot of other reasons. In short, your vagina might be persistently dry at some point — even when you’re feeling thirsty.

One 2016 study of 70 (cisgender) women found that two-thirds of participants experienced increased vaginal lubrication after using a vibrator for three months.

The verdict: Using a vibrator could help your vagina produce more lubrication on its own.

The caveat: You should always use a lubricant when you use a vibrator, otherwise you risk creating tiny tears in your skin, which could actually lead to more irritation longterm. So, stock up on a good-quality lube first.

Anorgasmia

If you feel like orgasms always elude you, then you may be experiencing anorgasmia — or simply put, a lack of orgasms. Anorgasmia can be caused my oodles of things, from stress and a history of trauma to reduced nerve response and you or your partners simply not knowing how to help you reach orgasm.

Vibrators provide intense stimulation, so if you’ve struggled to reach orgasm (and you want to have one), adding a vibrator to your sexual toolkit can help.

The verdict: A vibrator might help with this, but it’s not as simple as it seems.

The caveat: Depending on what the root cause is, a vibrator might not help you reach orgasm. It’s worth a shot, but if it doesn’t help you, that’s okay too.

Healing from Sexual Trauma

Sexual violence isn’t an uncommon experience, and even though we’ve made strides in talking about it, we still don’t talk much about its after-effects. After experiencing sexual trauma, many people experience a range of sexual difficulties, including — but certainly not only — sexual avoidance.

As a sex educator who has also worked as a victim’s advocate, sex toys are something that my students often ask me about, so let’s jump right to the answer here.

The verdict: Vibrators and other sex toys can be helpful tools if you’re healing from sexual trauma, helping you to regain a sense of control and autonomy over your body.

The caveat: This is just one part of healing from sexual trauma, and I wouldn’t identify it as a starting point (though maybe you would). You deserve to address all of the parts of your healing journey. Resources like RAINN can help you connect to support systems local to you.

Menstrual Cramps

Ugh. Ibuprofen, heating pads, and epsom salt baths can only take us so far, so it would be pretty awesome if vibrators could help with menstrual cramps. And, thanks to a combination of pelvic floor contractions and endorphins released during orgasm, they can!

The verdict: Yes, if you have orgasms with your vibrator, it might help relieve period cramps.

The caveat: If you typically experience cramping or slight pain during or after orgasm, then using a vibrator during your period might make you feel even more uncomfortable.

Headaches

Whether your headaches are caused by your kids, a stressful job, or both, you’re probably in the market for something that can help relieve that annoying pain. You’re probably familiar with the “not tonight dear, I have a headache” trope, but is it actually backwards? Can sex help headaches? Maybe. But literally just maybe.

The verdict: Maybe. Some people say that having orgasms relieves their headaches, and you could be one of them.

The caveat: Some people say that having orgasms makes their headaches worse, and some people often experience headaches after orgasm. So, proceed with caution — and if you’re part of that second group, it’s worth talking to a doctor.

Vaginal Atrophy

No, not giving your vagina a trophy (though it deserves one, tbh). Vaginal atrophy is “thinning, drying and inflammation of the vaginal walls that may occur when your body has less estrogen” according to the Mayo Clinic’s definition. It often happens when you begin menopause, but can also happen to people with vaginas who are on a testosterone therapy regiment.

Vaginal atrophy can make penetrative sex painful (or even impossible), but can vibes actually help?

The verdict: Sex and orgasms stimulate blood flow to the pelvis, increase lubrication, and can help with the symptoms of atrophy. But…

The caveat: You shouldn’t use vibrators without lube, and if you’re already experiencing severe symptoms of atrophy, I wouldn’t recommend jumping straight to an internal vibrator. Talk with your doctor about complementary treatments you can try, too.

Self-Confidence

Sure, you could do a power pose, but why not also bring some confident vibes into your life? Many sex toy companies have updated their websites, packaging, and advertising to include messages of self-love and self-confidence. But can you actually unbox self-confidence when you unbox a toy? Sort of.

Masturbation is positively linked to higher rates of self-esteem and sexual satisfaction, which are two big components of self-confidence. So, you could make the leap and say that using a vibrator can improve your self-confidence.

The verdict: Taking control of your sexual satisfaction can be confidence-inspiring, at least in the bedroom.

The caveat: Your new vibrator might help you reach orgasm in 90 seconds or less, but self-confidence doesn’t come so quickly. It’s a mindset and environment shift that can take time — so don’t expect an instant fix.

Leaving a Bad Relationship

Some pleasure-positive influencers will say that the key to not staying in bad relationships is having a good, fully-charged vibrator in your nightstand. But, uh…it’s a lot more complicated than that. People stay in unhealthy relationships for a lot of reasons, and your vibrator probably isn’t going to help you leave one.

The verdict: A vibrator probably won’t help you leave a bad relationship.

The caveat: A vibrator might help you make more balanced decisions about who you want to have sex with, which in turn might leave you feeling more physically and emotionally satisfied.

Depression

Whether it’s seasonal or here all year, depression is that pesky cloud that can interrupt your sex life and pretty much everything else. So, if you’re experiencing depression, can vibrators and other sex toys actually help clear the clouds?

Orgasms release a jumble of hormones that cause positive feelings — oxytocin, dopamine, and endorphins. That means that they can cause an elevated mood. But, as we know, depression isn’t a mood — it’s a mental health illness that is more pervasive than grumpiness.

The verdict: Vibrators can help you reach orgasm, which can boost your mood.

The caveat: Orgasms and vibrators aren’t a magic cure for depression, but the mood boost can help make moving through your day a bit easier (in combination with therapy and potentially medication).

So, no, your vibrator isn’t going to cure every possible ailment you might develop. But also, it doesn’t really matter. Vibrators can help you have orgasms, and orgasms can make you feel good. Invest in one for its health benefits or just because you want to give your hand a break — it’s your life, so you do you.

Complete Article HERE!

Why painful sex can plague women at any age

By Erin Blakemore

Your brain may be ready for sex. But what if your body refuses to cooperate? Women desiring intimacy with their partner sometimes experience pain instead of pleasure. Painful intercourse can happen even without other health issues — and it’s more common than you might think.

In a nationally representative 2013 survey, 1 in 5 women reported vulvar pain or discomfort during sex in the previous 30 days, and about 30 percent of women in a similar 2012 survey reported pain during their most recent sexual contact. Sometimes the pain is brief. But in others, it’s persistent.

Painful sex, known medically as dyspareunia, can have a variety of causes. Most affect women of all ages, although some women experience its onset during or after menopause. A variety of conditions, including endometriosis and a thinning of the vaginal wall, can be to blame — and sometimes, the pain has no discernible cause.

The pain can range from the discomfort of vaginal dryness to painful pelvic contractions or burning vulvar pain during penetration. Physical causes range. A lack of arousal or low estrogen can cause vaginal dryness and soreness. Infections or inflammation can lead to painful contractions of the pelvic muscles or burning pain during penetration. Birth control pills have also been linked with vulvar pain and uncomfortable intercourse.

Endometriosis, which is thought to affect up to 11 percent of American women of reproductive age, can be the culprit. In a nationally representative 2012 survey, 29.5 percent of women with endometriosis reported dyspareunia, too. The condition, which causes the cells that line the inside of the uterus to grow in other parts of the body, can cause bleeding, stabbing pain or cramping that can last for days after sex.

Other women experience vulvodynia: genital pain that burns, stings or throbs and makes sex uncomfortable or impossible. Although it’s correlated with past vaginal infections and pelvic floor weakness, the disease is still not well understood and there is no known cause. Treatments range from psychological interventions to pelvic floor therapy and vestibulectomy, a surgery that removes painful tissue along the vestibule, which surrounds the openings of the vagina and urethra.

A history of sexual trauma is also linked to painful intercourse, including genito-pelvic pain or penetration disorder. Previously known as vaginismus, the condition can involve painful vaginal spasms when something enters the vagina and is thought to be caused by a fear of penetration.

For many women, painful sex begins with menopause. During menopause, the ovaries produce less estrogen, the hormone that helps ensure vaginal lubrication and keep the lining of the vagina flexible and thick. Decreased estrogen can cause painful dryness, thin the vaginal walls and even shrink vaginal tissue. Those changes are known as vaginal atrophy. Vaginal estrogen therapy can help; so can vaginal moisturizers and the use of silicone-based lubricants during sex.

Azmia Magane, a 34-year-old social worker from Orlando, experienced painful intercourse early in her marriage. A variety of symptoms made sex challenging and, often, impossible. During and after sex, pain would shoot through her abdomen or radiate from her bladder. Sometimes, uterine polyps led to painful bloating after sex. And vaginal dryness made seemingly pleasurable acts feel more like torture.

In Magane’s case, endometriosis, polyps and other chronic health challenges were to blame. Vaginal dryness was one of the biggest obstacles between her and physical intimacy with her new husband, she says. “It just feels like shards of glass,” Magane says. “It’s very, very uncomfortable.”

Painful intercourse can affect self-esteem, body image and relationships. But despite its prevalence and importance, says Leah Millheiser, its highly personal nature means it can go unspoken and untreated. Millheiser, a clinical assistant professor at Stanford University and director of the female sexual medicine program there, says social taboos can get in the way of diagnosis and treatment.

“Some people are just uncomfortable talking about that area,” she says.

No matter the cause, self-esteem and relationships can start to hurt along with sexual intercourse. In a 2014 survey, 58 percent of postmenopausal women with vaginal discomfort said they avoid intimacy; 78 percent of their male partners agreed. Thirty percent of women surveyed said vaginal pain caused them to stop having sex entirely.

“It has caused some strain on my relationship,” Magane says. “It can really destroy your self-confidence.”

Silence in the doctor’s office can make matters worse, delaying treatment or causing women to seek out unproven treatments on their own.

“[Doctors] need to learn to step outside of our comfort zone and really address the issue of sexual function with our patients,” Millheiser says.

The conditions that can make sex painful are common — vulvovaginal atrophy, for example, affects up to 50 percent of postmenopausal women. Yet only 7 percent of women receive treatment for the condition.

Women who experience uncomfortable sex may also feel uncomfortable bringing up their complaints during a routine appointment. Doctors can share that discomfort, or not think to ask about sexual health, Millheiser says.

They can also minimize or ignore symptoms of sexual pain. It can take years for patients to receive a diagnosis of conditions that affect sexual health; with endometriosis, for example, patients wait an average of 6.7 years.

That’s what happened to Magane, who experienced excruciating pain, unsympathetic providers, and a botched laparoscopy before she was diagnosed with endometriosis. She recommends that women look for sympathetic providers — and that they insist on answers.

“I know my body,” she says. “I am an expert in my body. [Doctors] may have a medical degree, but I’ve lived in my body for 34 years and I know what’s normal and what is not. Painful intercourse absolutely is not normal — sex shouldn’t hurt.”

Millheiser says women shouldn’t suffer in silence. Patients may not think painful sex is worth bringing up, or worry that they’ll offend their health-care provider by discussing sex.

These days, Magane supplements her treatment with meditation and yoga. She has found some relief through pelvic floor therapy, too. It’s a form of physical therapy that can reduce pelvic pain and make physical intimacy more pleasurable.

“I actually had my husband come to one of my appointments,” she says. “It kind of gave him a visual of what I was going through.”

Although her ordeal has been painful, she says it has reminded her that “intimacy is about more than intercourse. Continuing to nourish the other intimate aspects of your life is important.”

Nonetheless, she says, women should experience everything their bodies are capable of. “Sex is a really important part of the human experience,” she says.

Millheiser agrees. “Sexual health is as important as any other part of your health. It’s about relationships. It’s about self-esteem.”

And luckily, she says, “there are effective treatments out there.”

Complete Article HERE!

Can Your Vagina Be Too Tight For Sex?

Not exactly, but there are reasons it might *feel* that way.

By

It’s a logical conclusion: If it hurts when a partner tries to put their penis or a toy inside of you, or if they can’t get all the way inside, then it must be a problem of tightness, right? Ehhh, not exactly.

There are several reasons for why you might feel like you’re too tight for vaginal penetration, and it’s actually a pretty common problem that gynecologists hear about. But it’s a misconception that feeling a sensation of tightness means you actually have less elasticity down there—and thinking this may prevent you from finding a real (and, in many cases, easy!) solution.

The truth is, vaginas are ridiculously stretchy, says ob-gyn Susan Khalil, MD, director of sexual health for the Mount Sinai Health System. Think about it: Lots of people push babies out of that tiny hole, so it’s gotta give.

So if it’s not a problem of stretch, what’s the issue? Well, there are a variety of factors that might be at play. For instance, “Certain medical conditions can mimic the feeling of tightness,” Dr. Khalil says.

Here are a few common reasons why it may feel as if your vagina is too tight for sex, plus how to find relief.

You went through a hormonal shift.

During menopause, your body experiences a drop in estrogen, which can lead to dryness and the thinning of vaginal tissues, the Mayo Clinic explains. As a result, you may feel a sensation of tightness or irritation during sex. This is something you should bring up with your doctor, who can recommend an over-the-counter vaginal lubricant, or possibly a prescription estrogen cream or hormone replacement therapy.

For some people, menopause messes with more than just lubrication. Sometimes a postmenopausal vagina also atrophies a little bit, Dr. Khalil says, meaning it literally gets more narrow. “And if they don’t have intercourse at all, it can become very uncomfortable,” she says.

Her recommendation? Masturbation. This way, you’re in total control and can gradually help stretch your vagina and make penetration feel more comfortable for you. If a larger toy is uncomfortable at first, you can practice with a series of vaginal dilators that will help your vagina stretch slowly over time.

Birth control, too, can sometimes cause a bit of hormonal upheaval for some people and cause dryness (and, in turn, painful sex). If you just switched your BC and noticed feeling dry or “tight,” or if you have this issue at a particular time during the month, talk to your doctor about it so they can help you determine whether your birth control might be to blame.

You recently had a baby.

Pregnancy and childbirth also involve hormonal changes that can lead to vaginal dryness and issues with painful sex. This is especially the case if you are breastfeeding, according to the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecologists (ACOG).

Or, if you’re seriously convinced your vagina is tighter after childbirth, it may not be in your head. Though this isn’t super common, Dr. Khalil says that some women who tear during childbirth get stitched up too tightly—meaning that in this one case, their vagina truly is too tight for sex. “Sometimes sutures are done too tightly [and] they’ll need a surgical procedure to fix it,” Dr. Khalil notes.

The same thing can happen if you’ve had a surgery in your genital area (with or without a baby involved), Dr. Khalil notes. But once your doctor goes back in and loosens the stitch, you should be good to go.

Your vagina is too dry.

There’s a laundry list of of reasons for why your vagina may be producing less natural lubrication than it usually does: Maybe you’re going through menopause, you’re breastfeeding, your vagina is naturally dry, or you’re on medication (yup, like birth control) that messes with your lubrication.

Regardless of the reason, though, not having enough lubrication can make sex feel more painful and might make you think your vagina seems tighter, Dr. Khalil says. “I’ll have patients come in and they’ll say it really hurts to have sex,” she says.

Luckily, the immediate solution is pretty easy most of the time: Use a lubricant. Tbh, lubricant makes sex feel better for most people, but it’s especially helpful for people who are dealing with vaginal dryness. Keep in mind, using lube doesn’t actually fix the underlying issue at hand (say, finding a birth control that vibes better with your body), so you should still *always* bring it up with your doc if dryness is a problem for you.

You have vaginismus.

Some people have a condition called vaginismus, which is when the muscles inside their vagina contract involuntarily. The muscle contraction makes it painful anytime something is inserted into the vagina; sometimes even tampon insertion is too much, according to the Merck Manuals.

Most of the time, someone who has vaginismus has it from the very first time they attempt to have penetrative sex. But in other cases it can develop later in life. For some, the cause behind vaginismus may be psychological or a result of an emotional trauma, the Merck Manual says.

While it may take some time to treat vaginismus, working with a pelvic floor physical therapist or gradually using larger and larger vaginal dilators can help, Dr. Khalil says. Working with a mental health professional may also help some individuals.

No matter what, Dr. Khalil encourages talking openly about *any* vaginal discomfort that you’re unsure about.

Whether you feel “tight” or something else, know that you deserve to feel pain-free down below during sex and everything else in life. So be your own health advocate and speak up—to both your partner(s) and your gynecologist.

“Your annual exam is more than a Pap smear,” Dr. Khalil says. “It’s also an opportunity to get to the bottom of any sexual health concerns.”

Complete Article HERE!

For Menopause Sex Discomfort, Gel Worked as Well as Estrogen

Study find gels worked as well as prescription hormone tablets at reducing symptoms of menopause-related sexual discomfort.

By Lindsey Tanner

[I]n a study of women with menopause-related sexual discomfort, gels worked as well as prescription hormone tablets at reducing symptoms.

The researchers say the results suggest low-cost, over-the-counter moisturizers might be the best option.

Most women in the study reported some relief from their most bothersome symptoms — painful intercourse, vaginal dryness or itching — regardless of treatment. Still, not quite half the women experienced what researchers considered a meaningful decline in symptom severity.

The problems are linked with declining levels of the hormone estrogen, which happens to all women when they reach menopause.

What baffles researchers is why only about half of women experience bothersome symptoms. Without that answer, pinpointing the cause and finding the perfect solution is difficult, said Dr. Caroline Mitchell, the study’s lead author and a researcher at Massachusetts General Hospital.
Continue reading the main story

“Until we know why, our treatments are really just pretty broad attempts,” Mitchell said. “We’re not targeting the true biological root cause.”

Researchers enrolled 300 women at a Kaiser Permanente research institute in Seattle and at the University of Minnesota. Women were randomly assigned to one of three treatments: prescription vaginal estrogen tablets and a gel with inactive ingredients; placebo tablets and Replens over-the counter moisturizer; or placebo tablets and the inert gel. Treatment lasted 12 weeks.

The results were published Monday in JAMA Internal Medicine. The National Institutes of Health paid for the study and the researchers have no financial ties to the products studied.

A journal editorial says there have been few similar studies and most were too small to reach conclusive results.

The latest results show that prescription treatment that can cost $200 is no better than over-the-counter moisturizers costing less than $20. The researchers noted that some women may prefer tablets to creams, which can be messy, but the extra money won’t buy extra relief.

Women with troublesome symptoms “should choose the cheapest moisturizer or lubricant available over the counter — at least until new evidence arises to suggest that there is any benefit to doing otherwise,” the editorial said.

Complete Article HERE!

5 common questions about vaginas answered

A sexual health nurse reveals all

By

[W]e don’t often bring up genitals in polite conversation but learning more about vaginas can empower women to make the right decisions about their general and sexual health – and know when to seek medical advice.

Helen Knox, a clinical nurse specialist in contraception and sexual health – and founder of Sexplained – shares the vaginal health questions she hears most frequently and the advice she gives women about how best to care for their most intimate area:

1. Is my vaginal normal?

“I often get asked if the smell or discharge a woman is experiencing is ‘normal’. Firstly, normal is what is normal to you. Your vagina will have its own smell, regular discharge and shape. If you notice a change from your norm such as a change in discharge, smell or discomfort, then there may be something up. But don’t be embarrassed about it and do nothing. You can ask your pharmacist to help you work out what might be going on and give you an over the counter treatment. But if you are in pain, are bleeding abnormally or have persistent symptoms then you must see your GP.”

2. What should my vagina smell like?

“Your vulva and your vagina should smell like you, if this smell changes then something might be up. Your healthy vagina is all about balance: it is home to millions of micro-organisms, and is normally good at keeping them in balance.”

“When this balance gets disrupted, you’ll start to notice things aren’t quite right and you could be developing bacterial vaginosis (BV) which is a very common condition that often causes a fishy smell. BV is in fact two times more common than thrush and like thrush it can be simply treated with an over the counter treatment. Lactic acid based products such as Balance Activ (available at Amazon.co.uk) help to rebalance the healthy bacterial conditions within the vagina, to gently and effectively treat the symptoms of BV by restoring normal pH and vaginal flora.”

3. What should my vagina look like?

“Just like the rest of our bodies, our vaginas are all unique. The only part you can see is the vulva, and these come in all shapes and sizes. If you are experiencing any soreness, itching or other changes there may be a problem that needs checking out. In general, adding anything to your vagina such as glitters or perfumes is going to upset your natural balance and encourage conditions like BV, so I really wouldn’t recommend it.”

“You can’t see your vagina, as it is inside you, and it runs from your vulva, up to your cervix, but as long as you’re not experiencing any unusual smells or discomfort, it’s very likely to be looking after itself – and doesn’t need to be messed about with.”

4. Is my discharge normal?

“The vagina is a relatively acidic environment which keeps itself healthy by producing a range of secretions, so women will experience natural changes in discharge throughout their monthly cycle.”

A period generally lasts for 4-5 days, followed by slight dryness and then an increase in discharge. This will normally be white at first and then change to a clear, stretchy consistency during peak fertility. After ovulation, it changes to a dryer, thicker white or creamy mucus, which sperm won’t be able to swim through. If you’re pregnant this doesn’t change. If you’re not, it’s back to the next period.”

“Even in a healthy vagina, there will be a variety of changes to your ‘normal’ discharge, and these can also vary depending on your age and other factors. A change in discharge to it becoming really thin and watery, or thick and cottage cheese like, or a fishy or unpleasant smell may be a sign that something is wrong and your natural balance has been upset – you can check your symptoms at via the online symptom checker or speak to your doctor, pharmacist or sexual health clinic if you are worried.”

5. How do I keep my vagina clean?

Your vagina cleans itself. It is a common misconception that having conditions like BV means you are not clean – in fact when women notice an unpleasant smell (especially after sex) they will often reach for the soap or perfumed shower gel – this can actually make things worse! There’s a delicate eco-system up there, working hard to keep a balance of bacteria so douching or washing with perfumed products can upset this balance and cause BV. As part of your daily cleaning routine, washing once a day with just water around the vulva, which is the skin around the opening, is fine.”

“By understanding your own normal and staying in tune with your body it will help you determine whether you have any issues. If you notice any changes, don’t sit with on-going symptoms wishing them way, discuss them with your Pharmacist who will happily help you, or make an appointment to discuss them with your GP. The chances are it will be something easily treated and managed.”

Complete Article HERE!

Chronically Dry Vagina, Oh MY!

As long as habit and routine dictate the pattern of living, new dimensions of the soul will not emerge. — Henry van Dyke

Name: Victoria
Gender:
Age: 22
Location: San Diego
Dear Dr Dick,
I love sex with my boyfriend. It is great but sometimes it can be a real pain. I can’t seam to stay wet for to long even if it feels really good I still tend to dry up. I have tried lubrication even lotion and it still only helps for a few minutes then I dry up again. I can cum but even then after a few I get dry again. It makes it so hard cause my boyfriend tends to think I’m not wet cause he doesn’t please me. Which isn’t true. He is, in fact, the best lover I have ever had. Please is there anything I can do to help so I don’t dry up so fast?

[B]ummer, Victoria, a chronically dry pussy is no fun. First, lets put your boyfriend’s mind to rest. It ain’t you, darlin’. Hey Bub, listen to your woman, you’re pleasing her just fine, the problem resides in her inability to produce sufficient lubrication to make fucking fun and easy. But lets see if we can get to the bottom of this AACS — Acute Arid Cunt Syndrome — and maybe we’ll find a solution along the way.

Ya know, if you’re using the wrong kind of lube for the job it’s gonna dry out, sure as shootin’. And since I don’t know what you are using, I’m gonna use the scattergun approach. There are several different types of vaginal lubricants available over-the-counter, as well as estrogen-based creams available by prescription. Vaginal lubricants come in tubes, plastic squeezie bottles, and some women swear by the vitamin E vaginal suppositories.

If I had to guess, I’d say you were trying to get the job done by using a water-based lube, right? If that’s the case, I suggest you switch to a Silicon-based lubricant. They don’t dry out as quickly as water-based lubes. They tend to be a bit more expensive; they’re not water-soluble and clean up can be a bit of a chore. So, you’ll not want to use this stuff while fucking on the brand new Laura Ashley’s, don’t ‘cha know. But all of the drawbacks to a Silicon-based lube will pale in comparison to some mighty fine slippery fucking. Look for Pjur Woman Bodyglide, in Dr Dick Stockroom. Mind as well plug one of my favorite sponsors, right? If that doesn’t work, I’d ask a doctor about an estrogen-based cream.

But before we go there, maybe you should be asking yourself what gives with your Acute Arid Cunt Syndrome anyway. Is anything about your lifestyle that contributes to the problem? You know lot of very popular meds Interfere with natural vaginal lubrication including:

  • Halcion
  • Xanax
  • Ativan
  • Calcium channel blockers
  • Beta-blockers
  • And especially prescribed and over-the-counter cold and allergy medications.

High levels of stress and depression, as well as a hormone imbalance, can cause vaginal dryness. If this is you, you can combat some of this by boosting your water intake. If you’re not adequately hydrated — at least ten 8-oz glasses of water a day — kinda hydration, you know you’re gonna have a problem.

Also, hand and body soaps and a lotta laundry products can contain scents and other chemicals that will irritate the delicate mucosal tissues that line your pussy.

A healthy diet and proper exercise is also important to maintaining a healthy level of natural lubrication. Ya know those low-fat, high-carb diets many women are on these days? Well, they literally starve your body of the nutrients it needs to make sex hormones. For example, the estrogen needed for vaginal lubrication is made from cholesterol, something women on low-fat diets are woefully lacking.

Good luck

U. B. Goode

As long as habit and routine dictate the pattern of living, new dimensions of the soul will not emerge. — Henry van Dyke

Name: Victoria
Gender:
Age: 22
Location: San Diego
I love sex with my boyfriend. It is great but sometimes it can be a real pain. I can’t seam to stay wet for to long even if it feels really good I still tend to dry up. I have tryed lubrication even lotion and it still only helps for a few mins then I dry up again. I can cum but even then after a few I get dry again. It makes it so hard cause my boyfriend tends to think I’m not wet cause he dosen’t please me. When it is not true. He is in fact the best lover I have ever had. Please is there anything I can do to help so I don’t dry up so fast?

Bummer, Victoria, a chronically dry pussy is no fun. First, lets put your boyfriend’s mind to rest.wet_pussy.JPG

Hey Bub, it ain’t you, darlin’. Listen to your woman. You’re pleasing her just fine. The problem resides in her inability to produce sufficient lubrication to make fucking fun and effortless. But lets see if we can get to the bottom of this AACS — Acute Arid Cunt Syndrome — and maybe we’ll find a solution along the way.

Ya know, Victoria, if you’re using the wrong kind of lube for the job it’s gonna dry out, sure as shootin’. And since I don’t know what you are using, I’m gonna employ the scattergun approach. There are several different types of vaginal lubricants available over-the-counter, as well as estrogen-based creams available by prescription. Vaginal lubricants come in tubes, plastic squeezie bottles, and some women swear by the vitamin E vaginal suppositories.

If I had to guess, I’d say you were trying to get the job done by using a water-based lube, right? If that’s the case, I suggest you switch to a Silicon-based lubricant. They don’t dry out as quickly as water-based lubes. They tend to be a bit more expensive. They’re not water-soluble, so clean up can be a bit of a chore. Here’s a tip: you’ll want to avoid using a Silicon-based lube while fucking on the brand new Laura Ashley’s, don’t ‘cha know. But all these minor drawbacks pale in comparison to some mighty fine slippery fucking. Look for Pjur Woman Bodyglide, 100 ml (B305), in Dr Dick Stockroom. Mind as well plug one of my favorite sponsors, right? If that doesn’t work, I’d ask a doctor about an estrogen-based cream.

dry_pussy.jpgBut before we go there, maybe you should be asking yourself what gives with your Acute Arid Cunt Syndrome anyway. Is anything about your lifestyle that contributes to the problem? You know lot of very popular meds interfere with natural vaginal lubrication including:

• Halcion
• Xanax
• Ativan
• Calcium channel blockers
• Beta-blockers
• and especially prescribed and over-the-counter cold and allergy medications.

High levels of stress and depression, as well as a hormone imbalance, can cause vaginal dryness too. If this sounds like you, you can combat some of this by boosting your water intake. If you’re not adequately hydrated — at least ten 8-oz glasses of water a day — kinda hydration, you know you’re gonna have a problem.

Also, many hand and body soaps and a lotta laundry products contain scents and other chemicals that will irritate the delicate mucosal tissues that line your pussy.

A healthy diet and proper exercise is also important to maintaining a healthy level of natural lubrication. Ya know those low-fat, high-carb diets many women are on these days? Well, they literally starve your body of the nutrients it needs to make sex hormones. For example, the estrogen needed for vaginal lubrication is made from cholesterol, something women on low-fat diets are woefully lacking.

Name: LARRY
Gender:
Age: 23
Location: MYRTLE BEACH SC
WHERE DOES SEMEN COME FROM? THAT IS TO SAY WHAT ORGAN (ORGANS) MAKE IT AND WHERE IS IT STORED. WHAT EXACTLY HAPPENS AT CLIMAX? IF YOU CLIMAX WITHOUT CUMING IS THAT SOMETHING THAT SHOULD CONCERN ME

Semen is the technical name for male ejaculate. However, we here at Dr Dick’s Sex Advice like to refer to this man juice as spooge, spunk, jizz or cum. Semen contains sperm, of course, which is produced in your testicles. It also contains a complex “soup” called seminal fluid, which is produced by various sex glands in your body. But, despite its complexity, baby batter is 90% water.

Your most important sex glands, the seminal vesicles, produce 70% of your joy juice. This seminal fluid iscum_shot99.JPG viscous and alkaline. The alkaline quality is very important because it neutralizes the acidic environment of your urethra and a woman’s vagina, which would otherwise kill all your little sperm-letts or at least make them inactive. And what good is inactive sperm?

Seminal fluid also contains a simple sugar, which provides the energy your seed needs to survive and wriggle about like crazy. Oh and precum. the stuff that often drizzles from your man meat while you’re being aroused, comes from the Cowper’s gland, and it too paves the way for a healthy ride for your delicate spermatozoa.

About 25% of the volume of your spooge comes from your prostate gland. This gives your spunk its milky appearance. Your prostate also adds substances, which increase the survival rate of your baby seeds.

On average, a man ejaculates between 2.5 and 5 ml of jizz per wad, which contains about 50 – 150 million sperm per milliliter. Just think of that next time you shoot your business into that dirty sock at the side of your bed. And here’s another thing, if a dude’s sperm count falls below 20 million per milliliter, he’s likely to be infertile, or as we like to call it — shootin’ blanks.

The amount of goop a guy gushes varies greatly, and has lots to do with how long his arousal period lasts before he shoots. Ya see, the longer the arousal period the more time there is for your fluids to build up. That’s why Dr Dick always suggests a nice long foreplay session. The greater the build up of spooge, the more powerful your ejaculatory contractions will be. Which, in turn, makes for a more intense orgasm.

You will notice that I am going out of my way to separate the two events — ejaculation and orgasm. For a most guys they happen simultaneously. But for the lucky few, and those who practice the art of tantra, multiple orgasms are possible before the ejaculation.

crreampie1.jpgYou’ll notice your spunk tends to be sticky and thick right after you blow your load. But soon there after it begins to separate and become more runny. This is pretty normal. It is also normal for the color and texture of your jizz to vary from time to time. Sometimes it can be real milky, sometime it’s clearer with only streaks of milkiness in it. It can also contain gelatinous globules from time to time. A lot of this has to do with how hydrated you are, how many times you’ve cum recently and of course your age. Spooge production diminishes as we age.

Each ejaculation is actually a collection of spurts that send waves of pleasure throughout your body, but especially in your cock and groin area. The first and second convulsions are usually the most intense, and propel the greatest quantity of jizz. Each following muscle contraction is associated with a diminishing volume of cum and a milder wave of pleasure.

Most of us men folk can’t resist increasing manual or thrusting stimulation when we get to the point of ejaculatory inevitably. Which is too bad, because if we practiced some simple edging techniques — that is coming right up to the point of shooting, but then halting direct cock stimulation till the urge to pop subsides — our pleasure would increase. We’d last longer and our expected orgasm would be more powerful.

The typical male orgasm lasts about 17 seconds but can vary from a few seconds up to about a full minute. A typical ejaculation consists of 10 to 15 contractions.cum_drip.jpg

I know that I mentioned this before, but it bears repeating here. A recent Australian study has suggests that frequent masturbation, particularly as a young man, appears to reduce the risk of prostate cancer later in life.

If you’re chokin’ the chicken a lot your sperm count will be low and the amount of jizz you produce will be less. But also age, testosterone level, nutrition and especially hydration play a big part in that too. Just remember, a low sperm count, is not the same thing as a diminished volume of cum.

When a guy blows his wad before he wants to, it’s called premature ejaculation. If a man is unable to ejaculate when he want to, even after prolonged stimulation, it is called delayed ejaculation, retarded ejaculation or anorgasmia.

An orgasm that is not accompanied by ejaculation is known as a dry orgasm. And that may or may not have anything to do with semen production, because some men ejaculate into their bladder, and that, my friend, is called a retrograde ejaculation.

Name: Ernie
Gender:
Age: 50
Location: Atlanta
I love to taste cum. However sometimes it is quite bitter. I’ve worried that it’s because someone is taking medicine that comes through in the semen. Am I at risk swallowing some cum if the guy is on heart medication or other meds?

Well, darlin’, like I always say, we are what we eat…or in this case…what we consume.

facial006.jpegAbsolutely, you can be assured that there are trace amounts of unmetabolized drugs — pharmaceutical as well as recreational — in cum. This is not as much of a concern for jizz lappers, like you, as it is for piss guzzlers. But you oughtn’t fool yourself into thinking there will be no residue.

Here are some fun spooge facts. It’s protein, baby! And It contains only about 12 to 15 calories per cum shot. That’s same amount found in an egg white.

Alcohol, drugs and nicotine will make a guy’s spooge bitter. If you want your spooge to be sweet tasting, void junk foods and have lots of fruits and greens in your diet instead. Fruit juices like pineapple, citrus, and cranberry are also known to make cum taste sweeter. The higher the sugar content; melon, mango, apple, or grape, the sweeter the spooge. Likewise, vegetables like parsley and celery are also recommended. And just so you know, consumption of these things, even 20 minutes before a blow job can effect the taste of the cum produced.

— — And ya know what? The same is true for effecting the taste of pussy juice. How sweet is that? — —

Avoid fish and red meat, they produce a bitter, fishy taste because of their alkaline content. Chemically-processed alcohol can also make your joy juice taste bitter. Naturally fermented drinks are less likely to do so. Garlic and onion are likely to produce strong odors in your spunk since they are high in sulfur; so lay off these. And of course, asparagus is to be avoided pre-blowjob too.

Good luck ya’ll