‘How do I clean my penis?’

Growing up, no one ever gave me the rundown on how or what I should do to keep my penis clean […] I’ve never read any reliable answer beyond washing it with water. Do I use soap? Any soap? How normal is smegma? If my penis gets itchy from smegma should I go see a doctor? If so, my GP or a urologist? — Anonymous

By

Key points

  • clean under the foreskin, using soap, but not too much
  • smegma is normal
  • if you have any concerns, see your GP.

It’s a shame some people think talking about cleaning and caring for our genitals is embarrassing or taboo. We probably know more about hair care than penis care.

The penis is simply another part of our anatomy, so cleaning should be relatively straight forward.

If you’ve been circumcised, where your foreskin was removed soon after birth, your penis will look something like the one in the diagram (below, right), with the head (or glans) always exposed.

But if you have a foreskin (below left and centre), there are some extra things to think about when washing, which we’ll get to soon.

Foreskin facts

But first, some foreskin facts. From around the time you turn five, your foreskin separates from the head of your penis, bit by bit. This allows you to pull back your foreskin (retract it). In some boys, the foreskin can stay partially stuck to the head of the penis until puberty.

You should never forcibly pull back your foreskin. That’ll be painful, you could bleed, you could scar, or have other complications.

OK, now for the washing part

Once your foreskin separates easily from the glans, gently retract and clean underneath the foreskin with each bath or shower. Then, after washing, pull the foreskin forward to its normal position.

When it’s time to dry off, retract the foreskin again so you can dry the head of the penis with a towel. Then, you guessed it, pull the foreskin forward to its normal position.

It’s OK to clean with soap whether you have a foreskin or not. But generally, too much soap is worse than none at all. Excessive cleaning removes essential body oils that would normally keep our skin moist and reduce friction. If you have sensitive skin, you can use a soap-free wash from the chemist.

What about smegma?

Smegma is a thick, whitish discharge consisting of a build-up of dead skin cells, oil and other fluids under the foreskin. And it’s very useful. It protects and lubricates the penis.

Some people have oilier skin than others and tend to have more smegma. So some smegma is normal, but if you have too much or it becomes smelly, you may need to clean more.

Things to watch out for (and when to see your GP)

If the head of your penis becomes painful, red, itchy and has a discharge, you may have a treatable condition called balanitis.

It’s more common if you have a foreskin. And the bacteria and fungus that cause it like the warm and moist conditions under there.

Skin disorders, infection, poor hygiene, friction from sexual activity, and using too much soap all cause the condition.

You can clear a mild case with good hygiene and simple treatments, such as an antiseptic or antifungal cream. You can buy these from any pharmacy. In addition to the medication, the cream itself helps protect and moisturise the inflammed skin.

If you have balanitis you may need to be more careful than usual to avoid urine irritating your inflamed skin. Retract your foreskin when you urinate. Dry the head of the penis gently after you finish.

If your penis is still inflamed after a week of these simple measures it’s best to see your GP. They can then investigate other causes, such as psoriasis or an allergy.

Complete Article HERE!

How to look after your penis

By Ed Noon

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The British are a nation of stoics, often too proud to admit we have a problem, and too polite to bother anyone else about it. Men are particularly bad at piping up about health issues, especially when it comes to our penises. Often, a source of embarrassment can be a simple lack of knowledge. Fortunately, the male anatomy is quite easy to understand, and learning what to say when seeing your GP can help avoid red faces. Read our guide from a working NHS doctor for how to keep your penis healthy…

Don’t use slang

The number of highly imaginative slang words that have been used to describe penises can leave patients embarrassed and doctors wondering. Keep it real and you’ll be taken seriously. Here’s a quick anatomically correct dictionary of our own for you to memorise and check off next time you’re in the mirror:

Penis and foreskin – no explanation needed.

Shaft – the main length of your penis but not including the glans (tip).

Glans/tip – the highly sensitive area at the end of the penis, usually covered by a foreskin, unless removed in an operation called a circumcision, with an opening for urine and semen to escape.

Meatus – pronounced “me-ay-tuss”, this is the medical name for that opening.

Testes – otherwise known as testicles or balls. All are acceptable.

Scrotum – this is the stretchy skin that forms a sack for your testes. A thin muscle allows the scrotum to contract, which it does so in cold conditions to maintain your sperm at a constant temperature.

Epididymis – behind and above the testes lies the area that stores the sperm made in the testes. Above the testes is a firm tube that carries your sperm from the epididymis (via the prostate which lies near your bladder, so it goes a long way) eventually out through your urethra to come out in the hole in the tip of your penis (yep, the meatus – well remembered).

Knowing just a small detail of anatomy can really take the embarrassment out of a problem when explaining things. So next time you notice that something’s not right, be confident and just tell your doctor “straight up”.

DIY penis maintenance

Many male problems don’t require the attention of a medical professional. Allow GQ to fill you in.

How to clean your penis

We often gaze in awe and talk excitedly about the nose-tingling, fungus-coated, ash-rolled, squishy goodness that is a well-stocked cheese counter. That’s not what you want people to experience when getting up close and personal with your penis. The “knob cheese” that is technically known as smegma, has a particularly vile smell and builds up when the area underneath a foreskin hasn’t been cleaned. This area should be cleaned daily (just pull back) along with the rest of your genitals, your bottom and the area in between, called the perineum. Use a mild soap as these areas can be sensitive.

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How to examine your scrotum

Testicular cancer is the most common cancer in young men. For this reason, every week you should examine each testis (the plural is testes) in turn between your finger and thumb by rolling the skin over them. The most common symptom is a lump of any size but you should book an appointment with your GP if you have any new feelings in the scrotal area.

On a lighter note, most lumps in the scrotum aren’t cancer, and if it does turn out to be cancer, it’s one of the most treatable forms of the disease. You should get to know your balls like the back of your hand.

Maintaining an erection

Erectile dysfunction, or impotence, is unfortunately common from middle age onwards and it’s caused by a narrowing of the blood vessels that pump blood to create and maintain an erection. This narrowing may occur for a number of reasons but high blood pressure, diabetes and smoking are high on the list. Giving up smoking seems like a no-brainer, and maintaining a healthy body weight and undertaking regular exercise reduce your risk of developing high blood pressure and diabetes.

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Protect your penis from STIs

STIs are invisible and often give no symptoms for many years so you won’t know if you’ve just passed one on, so you should always wear a condom. Available free at GPs and sexual health clinics, they significantly reduce the risk of the transmission of STIs but they’re nowhere near as effective if they remain unopened in your wallet. There are so many easy ways to get tested for STIs – a simple fingerpick test can detect HIV, and many GP surgeries have urine pots to test for chlamydia and gonorrhoea that you can pick up and drop off discretely without even making an appointment. No excuses.

Be careful with trimming

Many of us take pleasure in keeping neat and tidy. There are no hard and fast rules about what to do here, but a sensible one is to exercise caution. Be especially careful in the craggy terrain of your scrotum if shaving, where it can be technically more challenging to not make a tiny cut in the skin – this could potentially introduce harmful bacteria which could cause cellulitis, abscesses or worse, Fournier’s gangrene (Googling not recommended).

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Penis size really doesn’t matter to women

A 2015 survey of women presented with photographs of all types and sizes of penises published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine revealed that penis length was one of the least valued attributes. “Overall cosmetic appearance” came out on top. So no need to worry about whether your penis size is above or below average. Just keep it looking good.

Use your penis to keep it healthy

Make ejaculation part of your daily routine. Here’s why: a large Harvard study of nearly 30,000 men found the risk of prostate cancer was 33 per cent lower in men who’d ejaculated at least 21 times per month, compared to those who ejaculated only 4-7 times per month. This included ejaculations during sex, masturbation and, um, “nocturnal emissions”. Time to play catch up.

Complete Article HERE!

Treasure Trove

Hey sex fans,

Another edition of Product Review Friday is coming your way. Today, besides having a bunch of great products to tell you about, we welcome a new manufacturer to our review family. I’m delighted to introduce you to System JO, the company behind the products we review for you today.

Dr Dick Review Crew members, Joy & Dixie and yours truly, me, Dr Dick, will do the honors

System JO Men Adrenaline Shaving Cream —— $11.42

Dr Dick
I have the pleasure of introducing you to a fantastic new shaving product from the good people at System JO. It’s their Adrenaline Shaving Cream for men. This stuff is so cool. It comes out of the handsomely designed plastic squeeze bottle with the pop-up dispenser in the lid, as a gel. At first I thought there was some mistake. The package says “cream”, but look, it’s actually a gel. I began to rub the droplet I dispensed in my left palm with the tip of my fingers in my right hand. Miraculously, the gel turns into this very fine slick cream. It is so slick and fine that I didn’t need to more than a few drops to make enough cream to cover my entire beard. Damn, this stuff is phenomenal, I thought to myself. But the proof of a good shave cream, at least to my mind, is in the shave itself, not merely in the consistency of the product.

As I discovered with my very first use that Adrenaline Shaving Cream excels in delivering a close comfortable shave. I have pretty sensitive skin, but I didn’t experience any irritation when using Adrenaline Shaving Cream and my skin felt fantastic after each use. Like I said, a small amount covers a large area and it coats my skin nicely. Unlike all those dense shaving foams out there , this product allows your razor will glide along effortlessly. It won’t clog your razor and it rinses off your razor easily.

If you’re prone to razor burn, ingrown hairs and/or shaving bumps Adrenaline Shaving Cream is the ideal product for you. It’s enhanced with aloe vera, but it also contains parabens and glycerin.  If you have concerns about these ingredients, you may need to look elsewhere.

I’m happy I got the unscented formula for review, because that would have been my preference. However it also comes in cucumber and musk scents. There is also a companion line of shave cream for women.
Full Review HERE

System JO Men Deodorant With Pheromone —— $13.80

Dr Dick
Next up is the Men Deodorant With Pheromone. This product comes in a distinctive roll-on container. Do you remember when most all deodorants came in roll-on form? I do and I really miss having them around. Nowadays, it’s mostly messy gels and chalky sticks that don’t appeal to me all that much. I also don’t like that almost all deodorants these days have an intense scent to them. If I want to wear a scent I’ll chose my own, thank you very much.

So right off the bat Men Deodorant With Pheromone has a lot of the competition beat. It is a very effective deodorant, by the way. And that’s what I judge a deodorant by; it’s effectiveness at preventing body odor.

Now, Men Deodorant With Pheromone is different from the other deodorants you’ll likely find on your local store’s shelves in as much as it contains Androstenl.  The System JO website says this is a potent natural attractant that provokes a strong sexual response. OK, but how does one go about testing such a thing, I asked myself.

I first used Men Deodorant With Pheromone after I had taken a shower one day. It applies very easily, there is no staining, no running, no dripping, no chalky mess and there’s no discernible scent. I left the bathroom to dress myself. I sat on the bed to put on my socks and suddenly my dog, Ginger, jumps up on the bed and makes a beeline for my armpits. She seemed to be unable to get enough of the thing she was trying to smell. I started to laugh and just as suddenly as she was on the bed, she was off. Once on the floor she vigorously shook her head, flapping here ears and then sneezed. This is very unusual behavior for her. But then again, she’s a hunting dog, so she’s all nose.

Clearly there was something in the Men Deodorant With Pheromone that I was unable to detect, but that Ginger was wild for. It had to be the Men Deodorant With Pheromone, because she’s never exhibited that kind of behavior with any other deodorant I’ve ever used.
Full Review HERE

System JO Mild Clitoral Gel —— $18.25
System JO Wild Clitoral Gel —— $19.12

Joy & Dixie
Joy: “We’re going to review two products at once. The reason for this is that both products are basically the same thing with one important difference.”
Dixie: “The two products are: System JO Mild Clitoral Gel and Wild Clitoral Gel. You can probably guess that the important difference that Joy mentioned is intensity of the stimulation. By the way they also have ‘Light’ and an ‘Atomic’ version of the same product.”
Joy: “Both of the products boost sensation when applied to your clit. The active ingredient appears to be peppermint; so at least it a natural product. I’m very reluctant to apply something full of chemicals to my joy-spot. The peppermint also gives the products a mild minty fragrance.”
Dixie: “Joy’s joy-spot! Isn’t she clever? I guess I’d have to call mine; Dixie’s delicious-spot. Whatever you call your clit this Clitoral Gel will get your motor purrin’ real nice. The object, of course is to get the one that works best for you. We both tried each product. We both began by rubbing a couple of drops of the Mild Clitoral Gel directly to our clits. Then we waited for it to produce the promised warming and cooling sensation that tingles. Nothing much happened that either Joy or I could notice. We both looked at each other and kind of sighed. Are our clits that desensitized, we wondered? Could be, we guessed.”
Joy: “So we tried the Wild Clitoral Gel next. We applied the same amount in the same way as the first test. This time, BINGO! We both could feel the sensations within a minute, both warming and cooling. The peppermint was doing its thing. None of this is overwhelming in any sense of the word. Nor is it a particularly long lasting effect, which is a good thing. I wouldn’t want to be feeing this kind of sensation for too long.”
Dixie: “Both the Mild Clitoral Gel and Wild Clitoral Gel are silicone-based, which makes for a very nice silky texture, much like a silicone-based lube. This, however, brings one word of warning to mind. If you are using either of these products with a silicone toy, like a vibrator, be sure to sheath your toy in a condom first. There’s minimal packaging, which I really appreciate. The small tube containing the gel is inside a simple paper package that is recyclable.”
Full Review HERE

ENJOY

Pjur Part Zwei

Hey Sex Fans,

We’re back with Part Zwei (that’s Part 2 in German, don’t cha know!) of our latest Pjur reviews.  Why the German flair, you might ask?  Well, that’s because Pjur is a German company, silly!  And we’re all about makin folks feel at home here at Dr Dick’s Sex Toy Reviews.

This week we have three products to take a look at.  Review Crew Members — Glenn & Hank, Christa and Jada do the honors.

Pjur Power Cream Personal Lubricant 150ml / 5.1oz $17.95

Glenn & Hank

Glenn: “When pigs are at play, like Hank and me; we need a stand-up lube that won’t let us down!”Hank: “And when we’re in the thick of it, I don’t want to be fumblin’ around with a slick plastic bottle; just trying to get a grip on it so I can squeeze a paw full of lube. I wanna scoop my lube from a tub, damn it!”
Glenn: “He’s such a he-man, huh?”99240_pjur_power_premium_cream
Hank: “No, I’m serious. A tub of lube, particularly when the consistency is more like goop then liquid, is ideal for pig play. Since there’s nothing dainty about our play; there shouldn’t be anything dainty about our lube dispenser, if ya ask me”
Glenn: “Truer words were never spoken. That’s why we’re crazy over
Pjur Power Cream Personal Lubricant. Our lube of choice has always been, Pjur Original Bodyglide. There’s no beating their silicone-based lube. It’s slicker than shit!”
Hank: “That’s for sure. Now that we’ve gotten our hands on
Power Cream, we have two Pjur products to choose from.”
Glenn: “
Pjur Power Cream Personal Lubricant is like having two lubes in one; because it’s a combo of water-based and silicone-based lubes. I guess that’s what gives this stuff its thick creamy consistency that really has staying power.”
Hank: “And it lasts long too! There’s nothing I hate worse than a lube that dries out, or worse, gets sticky.”
Glenn: “It’s like totally safe to use with condoms too, which is perfect when we’re playing with others.”

Full review HERE!

Pjur Med Clean Spray Lotion 100ml / 3.4oz bottle $12.95

Pjur Med Clean Moist Toweletts 25 per pack $12.95

Jada

Good to be back with the Review Crew, especially since I have the good fortune to tell you about the Pjur Med Clean products.

Like everyone else on the Review Crew, I’m very fond of the Pjur lubes I’ve tried. I’ve never found better. Apparently they bring the same medclean-fampassion for perfection and innovation to their other products too. I’m fastidious about my personal hygiene and clean up after sex. But I also hate to ruin the intimate time after lovemaking by running off to the bathroom to tidy myself or clean my toys. The Pjur Med Clean products allow me to take care of any mess without leaving bed. I Love This Concept!

The moist toweletts and the handy spray are alcohol free and scent free. They are gentle on my skin, yet thoroughly effective.

The toweletts come in a discreet little package and the spray comes in a small container; both fit neatly in my bedside drawer. But they could easily fit in my purse. These are the idea products to have on hand for an impromptu encounter, if you know what I mean. And I think you do!

Full review HERE!

Pjur Cult For Rubber, Latex, Leather 100ml / 3.4oz $21.95

Christa

I guess I am the only Review Crew Member who is into latex. What’s up with the rest of you guys, anyway? I want to see Ken and Denise and Gina & Kevin in some rubber or latex. That would be so hot!06FP-Cult-bottle

This is only my second appearance with the Review Crew. I did one gig back in November, I think. I was the only one who would review the Divine Intervention Insertables. Ok, so my tastes are a little on the unconventional side, so sue me!

Anyhow, here I am again doin duty on a product no one else could do. I’m glad for that, because Pjur Cult is fuckin amazing. I’ll be the first to admit that latex and rubber wear is a bit labor intensive. Getting in and out of a body suit can be a real bitch. I don’t see how people with a lot of body hair do it. Maintenance of these articles can be a pain in the ass too.

But there is nothing like the feel of latex, or rubber! I got this super pair of Opera Length Latex Gloves, a kick-ass mini-skirt and this latex lace-up top. I also have a latex bodice that really shows off my rack. My little sub boyfriend, Benny, begs me to wear this shit every time we’re together. As if, you freak!

But Pjur Cult actually makes his wish a possibility. I’m able to get in (and out) of my outfits with ease. It also keeps this very expensive stuff in beautiful condition when I don’t have it on. It is oil-free and non-greasy and odorless too; thank you very much. It even feels great on my skin.

Full review HERE!

No Song Unsung, No Wine Untasted

Hey sex fans,

Listen up!

I’m adding a new feature to my Q&A columns.  Whenever possible, I will include in my response a link to a movie in my HOW TO VIDEO LIBRARY (see the VOD tab at the top of the page) that will further educate or enrich the person who is asking the question.

Think of it as at HOMEWORK or further study on the topic at hand.  I hope all of you will benefit from this terrific instructional and enriching resource.


Name: Bob
Gender:
Age: 48
Location: Long Island, N.Y.
Almost 20 yrs. ago I had a transexual encounter. It was different but wonderful. Now I find myself wanting to explore this experience again. I’m now married with kids and I know it’s cheating but it won’t leave my thoughts. I don’t know what to think. I love being with a woman but this hunger won’t go away and I ‘m not entirely sure if I want it to. I don’t know if this means I’m gay, bi, or what. Please, please, if you’ve any advice your help and thoughts would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

Hey Bob, the question of weather this craving makes you are gay, bi or what is the least of your issues, darlin’.  You got this jones about chicks with dicks and it won’t go away because you don’t want it to go away.  It’s a hunger that you feed by starving it. And I’m gonna go way out on a limb here and guess that you will, in pretty short order, go out and get you some of this exotic monkey love, just like before you were married.  And I also predict that you will make it a habit, risks to your comfortable life and cheating on you wife not withstanding.

Here’s the thing about sexual obsessions of any stripe.  The more you starve them the more the hunger consumes you.  So rather than treat the desire head on, perhaps you need to address the underlying issues that give rise to it.  I’d be willing to speculate that your life has become so predictable, mundane and lethargic that you long to be startled a114542_xlfawake from this slumber.  You entertain these juicy revelries as a way of keeping yourself from completely succumbing to the boredom.  Am I right, Bob?  I think I am.

You see, the real issue here is not your cravings for a walk on the wild side; it’s the boredom at your core.  Desperate men do desperate things.  And bored men do foolish things.  So I suppose you need to ask yourself, to what lengths are you willing to go to satisfy this craving?  And once you answer that, the more important question remains to be answered.  How many times will you have to satisfy your craving to balance out the monotony in the rest of your life?

You see, how this has virtually nothing to do with your sexual orientation, gay, bi or whatever; it has to do with your lifestyle.

Perhaps, indulging your sexual fantasy in the relatively harmless form of some video consumption might assuage your obsession.  It sure beats skippin’ out on your wife and family to satisfy your jones.

Name: Fran
Gender:  Female
Age: 33
Location: South Africa
I have a new lover, 10 years my junior.  We meet at a play party about three weeks ago.  He is very adventuresome and totally submissive.  He told me he wants me to shave him from head to toe and he wants me to do this while he is restrained and gagged.  I’m confident about my bondage skills, but I’ve never saved anyone.  Do you have any tips?

Some gals have all the luck!  You gots yourself a submissive pup; good for you!  Just think, this shaving scene could be a real Samson and Delilah kinda set up, and hopefully one of biblical proportions.  HOT!

The overall body shave can be a bit tricky, especially for those sensitive areas of the body not used to being shaved.  You can pretty much count on some nicks and cuts and there will be a fair amount of post-shave skin irritation too.  It’s just par for the course.  Ya’ll can minimize a lot of this by attending to some fundamentals before the event begins.

nakedballs

Most us men have discovered that shaving our face later in the day, or better…at night makes shaving easier.  The same is true for fetish shaving.  Nighttime is the best time!  Work in a clean, well-lit place.  The darkened dungeon is good choice for after-shave play, but you’ll need lots of light for the shave itself. You also need ready access to lots of clean hot water.  So why not strap the boy to the bathroom sink, shower head, or better yet the kitchen table.

If the pup resembles the missing link, you’ll want to start the whole business by trimming his body hair as close to the skin as possible before you employ the razor. I suggest using a high quality barber shears for this.

Choose your razors carefully. Unless you are a real connoisseur and know how to wield a straight razor, stick with safety razors.  Since you’re gonna be doing his whole body, be sure to stock up on a shit-load of the quality plastic disposable kind.  You will find that the blades dull really fast when they are shaving course body hair.  Dull razors, as everyone knows, will nick and scrape more than a sharp razor.  You’ll want to minimize the number of times you pull the razor across any given patch of skin so as to minimize razor burn.

Cover the area you are about to shave with a hot, wet towel. It’ll soften the hair and makes it easier to remove.  Use lots of shaving gel.  Gel is better than shaving cream for sensitive skin.  Always shave with the growth of the hair, not against.  Be sure to have a styptic pencil or gel handy to stop bleeding when you nick the little monkey.  And depending on how fastidious you are; keep a pair tweezers handy for yanking out the stray hairs you and your razor miss.  This will give your sub something to remember!

No matter how careful you are, there will always be microscopic nicks and cuts afterwards. Left untreated, this can leave the skin open to a nasty infection. To prevent this, apply a liberal amount of an astringent, like which hazel.  Hydrogen peroxide is and excellent and inexpensive alternative.

Ya know those nasty little red bumps that are caused by ingrown hairs?  You can cut down on these little buggers by buffing the freshly shaved area with a cosmetic buff pad.  Finally, a liberal application of a moisturizer is recommended to cut down on the itching that will inevitably follow.  If the sub has never done this before, he will soon find out that he will be plagued by itching as his hair starts to grow in.  Too bad for him, huh?

As you can see, this is gonna be a whole lot of work for you.  And there’s gonna be a lot of clean up too.  Lucky for you, you’ll have a freshly shaved sub to do all the work while you relax kick your feet up and eat your bonbons.

This might be helpful too — check out my review of The Ultimate Personal Shaver Kit HERE!

Here are some video suggestions to accompany my thoughts.

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Name: Susie
Gender:
Age: 25
Location: Indianapolis
My husband and I are beginning to experiment with some light bondage and discipline.  We’d like to know more about this and how to play safely.  Unfortunately, because of his job we are stuck here in Indianapolis for another whole year.  We have yet to find even one other person around here who shares our kink.  So we don’t have anyone to ask about this.

Ahhh, the joys of the heartland.  I’d be willing to guess there are other kinky pervs, like you guys, right there in Indian-apollis, but they don’t know how to find you anymore than you guys know how to find them.  Kinda sad, huh?  Well probably ya’ll are gonna need to turn to them internet tubes for the help you’re looking for.  Kink and BDSM sites abound.  Almost all of them have great “how to” and “helpful tips” sections geared to the budding kinkster.  Several of these sites also feature profiles, chat rooms and bulletin boards for like-minded folks to connect and play.

For something really special, check out my newest podcast series — Sex EDGE-U-cation.  I’m chatting with prominent educators, practitioners and advocates of unconventional sexual expressions and lifestyles from all over the world.

But since you are here, darlin’, I do have some preliminary thoughts to share.  First, every scene should be negotiated before play begins.  Never bypass this important step even if the two of you only play with one another.  Ya see, what you don’t want to have happen is to break the mood mid-scene to ask a question or seek direction.  All that should be taken care of before you start the play.  Get use to working out all the logistics a head of time.  These important negotiation sessions will also force you to communicate with each other and give you a ready vocabulary for talking with other prospective partners should the opportunity ever arise.

Negotiating a BDSM scene is not a “I’ll do this for you if you do that for me” sort of deal, like in vanilla sex.  Rather it’s an honest discussion about you and your partner’s wants, needs, expectations and limits for the scene. Regardless if you are the dominant top or a submissive bottom, you must be equal partners when negotiating each scene.

If you do this sort of play a lot, the negotiations may become perfunctory.  But like I said, a114592_xlf1they ought never be skipped.  The nature of these negotiations is to set parameters, ascertain boundaries and establish limits — for example the intensity and duration of the scene. You may find that you need to set a time limit for your play, or discuss the type of restraints and means of discipline to be used.  Debriefing (also known as Aftercare), once the scene is ended, is also a real good idea.  You’ll, of course, need to establish safewords for your play.  And if you don’t know what those are; you’d best stick to vanilla.

The more experience you have, the more likely you will develop a shorthand for negotiating your play.  However, the less experienced you are, the more important it will be to spell out absolutely everything.  Your negotiations ought to be a frank and open discussion, no holds bared as it were.  Remember, you are not in the scene yet.  So no one, dom or sub, has more input than the other.  Speak and question one another freely.

The first question the dom needs to ask of the sub is “What are your limits?” Be specific, direct and pointed when you ask about one’s limits. The novice sub may not know his or her limits, so the dom will have to proceed with the utmost caution.  This is where the safeword will most likely come into play.

The sub ought to have unqualified trust in the dom; without this the scene isn’t play, it’s abuse. Remember, there is never room for coercion in the negotiations.  Save the guilt tripping, shame-inducement and intimidation for the scene itself.

Here’s some at homework for you and your husband.  Check out The Surrender Of O.  This is just one of the exceptionally fine enrichment videos in my How To Video Library.

Name: juan
Gender: Male
Age: 32
Location:
When me and my wife have sex I like to cum in her ass. Is that bad for her?

If her’s is the only ass you cum in, there’s no problem.

However, if you’re dippin’ you wick in other bung-holes, or have multiple partners of any sort, exchanging bodily fluids is not recommended.

Good luck ya’ll

DAMN! That was close.

Look for my new Product Reviews!

REVIEW #19

I have the niftiest little gizmo here (actually two nifty gizmos) from the swell folks at The Ultimate Personal Shaver.  I have two because they sent me a kit to review.  Nut you can also buy these puppies separately too.

Anyhow, the Ultimate Personal Shaver System is a clever new way to trim and/or shave your naughty parts, and even some parts that are not so naughty.  But I am getting ahead of myself.  So unlike me, huh?

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Let me just say I wish I had these shavers available during my last video shoot.  Despite my long-suffering pleas to the talent to NEVER to shave their ding-dongs the day of the porn shoot.  Do you think they listen?  NO, they don’t.  So there we were shooting scene 1 — all lights, camera and action.  Things were gettin hot and heavy when what do my sore eyes detect?  A smear of blood on one of the actor’s leg then more blood on the other guy’s abdomen.  In no time at all it looked like we were shooting a surgery scene, not porn.  YIKES!

Sure enough, one of the performers had nicked himself manscaping his pubes earlier that morning.  The throws of the sex scene opened the cut and that was all she wrote.  Filming stopped, erections were lost and production costs escalated.  And it was all because the monkey didn’t take my advice about the shaving thing.  D’oh!

Don’t let this happen to you, sex fans!

The Ultimate Personal Shaver System is a must have for all porn stars — women, men and everyone in between.  Drag queens and dyke daddies will love these shavers too.  And if you, my precious reader, do not fall into any one of these categories you’ll still love The Ultimate Personal Shaver System.  I mean, who among us doesn’t have at least one itsy bitsy hair issue that needs attending?

Listen up; get one of these kits and there will be no more painful wax jobs, ingrown hairs or the heartbreak of a chemical or razor burn.  Just smooth, silky skin where there ought be smooth, silky skin, don’t ‘cha know.

…full review here