Category Archives: Body Issues

What’s She Been Doin’ With That Thang?

Name: Jasper
Gender: Male
Age: 48
Location: NC
My partner and I had not had sex for 5 months until yesterday. I have a large penis and normally have to be very gentle after we have gone awhile without sex. Yesterday she was very loose and had no problem with my insertion. Is this a good sign that she has been having sex with someone else over the last 5 months??

Jasper, Jasper, Jasper! Do you honestly think that the only way a woman can exercise and stretch her pussy is with a cock? Darlin’, what you don’t know about woman and sex is a lot!

Sexual-frustrationSo I gotta ask, why aren’t you humpin’ your partner with slightly more regularity than every 5 months? Is it you? Is there something about the way you bone her that makes it ok for her to go without your member for such a long period of time?

Maybe, just maybe, she tired of waiting for you to dole out the fuck. Maybe, she needs a bit more then the miserly amount of nookie you’re willing or able to provide. Maybe she’s takin’ care of business on her own. Maybe, she’s discovered the joys of self-pleasuring. Maybe she’s got a stash of manly-sized dildos that you know noting about, and she puts them to good use on a regular basis. Maybe she’s doin’ this because you’re not takin’ care of business at home, like ya oughta.

Listen bub, in the long 5 months that you’ve gone without partnered sex, did you squeeze off a few? Did you choke the chicken? Did you wrestle with the one-eyed monster? Did you wank your willie? I’ll bet you did. And I’ll bet you did with some regularity. You may have even slipped your baloney pony in someone else’s honey pot. Ya know, when long periods of sexual drought occur in a relationship; partners tend to discover how to fend for themselves. Am I right, or am I right?

So let’s just say that your old lady is out there gettin’ plugged by some unfamiliar johnson, and a big one at that. What of it? You certainly ain’t doin’ your part to keep her parts happy and fulfilled, are you?

Maybe, just maybe, you need to make amends to your long-suffering wife and look to pleasing her more frequently, before you let your imagination run away with you. In other words, find out what she likes and how she likes it; and let her have it just that way.

Good luck

Hey dr dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number? Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Is bigger better?

Name: Marie
Gender: Female
Age: 21
Location: Florida
I’ve had sex with exactly two guys. Each one has had an average sized penis, but both thought they were small. The sex we had was nice and I was happy with it. What I don’t understand is why guys have this obsession with having a large penis? From everything I’ve read, most women don’t care about size and yet that’s all I hear about from my guy friends. What gives?

Like I always say — Nothing quite captures a dude’s imagination like his cock. Its size, shape and general appearance is a source of endless wonderment. Unfortunately, along with all that wonderment there often comes envy. I wrote a long column about much the same thing back in February — Willie Worry & Willie Pride.huge pen..

I suppose if we never had anything to compare it to, our precious willie would be the best darn willie there ever was. That’s the beauty of self-love. Funny though how a guy’s self-admiration can evaporate when he’s confronted with the sight of some other fella swinging some heavy pipe. This change in mood is pretty predictable. Some people suggest that we have been programmed to believe that big is better. And this is a throwback to when us men folk were just learning to stand upright and move about on two legs. It would have been pretty obvious what we have hangin’ down there

Since the time of our primate ancestors, humans have worshiped the male phallus. At first the representations were nothing more than crude upright pillars of wood or stone called a lingam. The Egyptians created a more exalted depiction — the obelisk — to represent the sun god, Ra’s, cock. In time, the obelisk would morph into the church steeple and the mosque’s minaret, as the preferred religion changed with the ages. When capitalism became the new creed, the steeple and minaret morphed once again into the skyscraper. Simple upright pillar or immense high-rise they’re all statements of virility, power and prestige. And isn’t it just like us to believe that the city with the biggest skyscraper wins. If this “bigger is better” sort of mentality has been going on in art, architecture and religion for several millennia, you know for sure it’s been happening on an individual level too.

tantric_lingam_stone_536   Munich, Obelisk     Toshiba Exif JPEG     Istanbul_+Blaue+Moschee+Minarette14     swirl-skyscraper

From the beginning of recorded time different cultures have designated cock size as an outer sign of a man’s inner values. The size of a guy’s dong was synonymous with his status, power, masculinity and sexual potency. Curiously, the ancient Greeks prized a puny pecker as the standard of male beauty. A big dick was an object of ridicule. Their mythology saddled the satyrs — woodland creatures with pointy satyrears, hairy legs, and short goat-like horns — with exaggerated cocks to symbolize their excess and lechery. Aristotle reasoned that a small penis was more fertile than a large one, because the semen didn’t have to travel as far and it didn’t cool as much while making its ejaculatory journey. Whatever, Aristotle!

The Hindus also cherished a tiny endowment. Men with the smallest phallus, 2-3 inches, were the beautiful ideal. They were characterized as lithe and strong. Prodigious packages of 9+ inches were compared to those of the beasts. And men who possessed them were considered worthless and lazy. Imagine trying to sell these concepts today.

Except for the Greeks and Hindus, everyone else idolized generous phallic dimensions. For example, so obsessed were the Arabs with the notion big dick superiority that the Turks of the Ottoman Empire took advantage of this mindset. It was the practice of the Turks to publicly compare the cock size of vanquished Arab leaders with the superior size cocks of their own Turkish commanders. This, in the end, effectively shattered Arab resistance.

shunga5fbooks5fpillow5fbooks5f5f77Japanese “pillow books,” an early form of Asian porn, always depicted the men with exaggerated cocks and this was always to the delight of the admiring women. In renaissance Europe it was fashionable for men to don a “codpiece,” a primitive jock strap sort of thing sewn inside a guy’s drawers. The design was obviously intended to emphasize his package. Men of modest endowment, of course, found it necessary to pad their codpiece or be the object of scorn.

Here’s a startling statistic — Dr. Barry McCarthy, author of “Male Sexual Awareness,” found that two out of three men believe their dick is smaller than average. Isn’t that astonishing? How is that possible? I suppose given this culturally induced big dick bias, it’s no wonder men, of almost every historical age and society, have been obsessed with disguising their shortcomings, or trying to develop a method to compensate for what they consider to be their woeful inadequacy?

Around two thousand years ago, men in several tribes in Africa popularized the practice of hanging a weight from their cock. Actually, many historians believe the practice harkens back to ancient Egypt. The pharaohs were known to stretch their cock and balls using weights to increase sexual pleasure. Lots of guys do this very thing today — mostly for pleasure enhancement, but there are always those who think this is an effective way to increase the size of their dick.SURMA SURI TRIBE - OMO ETHIOPIA

Hanging a weight from the end of your cock (and/or balls) will sure enough stretch the tissues that make up your shaft (and/or sack). It’s gravity at work. But this can be dangerous because this practice can diminish the circulation of oxygen-rich blood, which is essential for the upkeep of the smooth muscle tissue. And smooth muscle tissue makes up about 90% of your cock. And doggoneit, this technique simply robs Peter to pay Paul, so to speak. What lengthening might happen comes at the expense of your dick’s thickness. Just stands to reason, you have only so much cock to work with. If you pull on it; it may get longer, but it’ll also gonna get thinner.

A modern variation on the age-old stretching techniques is the traction method. A guy puts his cock in a kind of noose and either straps his wiener to his leg, or hooks it up to a traction contraption that looks way too much like a medieval torture device for my tastes. The claim here is that constant stretching, makes the cells in this area divide and multiply, thus increasing the tissue mass. There’s no arguing with the concept, people have been using this method of centuries as a means of adorning and customizing their bodies, particularly lips and ears. Consider the women of the Surma tribe in Ethiopia — they wear lip plates. Their lower lip is pierced when they are young girls and stretched with ever-larger plates over time. But what they gain in beauty, they loose in sensitivity. The same thing is true of a guy’s cock. What he may gain in size he will surely loose in sensitivity. And that’s not a good thing.

The Jelq or Milking technique is an ancient method of penis enlargement practiced in the Middle East. Traditionally it was taught father to son when the kid reached adolescence. Wealthy families sent their boys to a gym or health club where a highly trained attendant would perform the Jelq technique on the boy each day. As a result of these daily treatments the kid’s dick would develop to dimensions not otherwise attained without the method. Modern day advocates of this technique claim that milking also works on the fully developed adult penis, but I have my reservations.

The Jelq involves massaging the semi-erect cock in a rhythmic and regular manner, enhancing blood flow within the shaft. The claim is that after several months of this, one could see a size increase, both in girth and length. Long-time practitioners claim gains of several inches in length are possible, but one can only imagine how many hours that might take over the course of a year or longer. Effective jelqing demands an hour or more each day for exercises. I mean, who has that kind of free time on his hands? No wonder most men fail to complete their jelqing programs.

Old_penis_pumpPenis enlargement pills and patches proliferate on internet, but there is virtually no documented evidence that they work. All such products use herbal ingredients, like ginkgo biloba and yohimbe, which act as stimulants and vasodilators. The best one can say is that some pills may enhance blood flow, which may, in some cases, cause an ever so slightly bigger woody. Once a program like this is started, it needs to be continued for as long as you want the effect to last. Imagine how much that would cost; this stuff is expensive

Finally, the early 20th century brings the advent of modern technology to the “treatment” of impotence, or as we currently know it: erectile dysfunction. Please note, all the devices and surgical interventions of the last 100 years were initially designed to treat ED. Only later did folks begin to use these interventions as male enhancement schemes. Take the Austrian inventor Otto Ledever for example. He reasoned that if a stiffy was all about blood flow then maybe he could come up with a device that would draw blood into a cock creating an erection where there wasn’t one before. In 1917, our hero patented an airtight cylinder topped by a bulb that created a vacuum within the chamber. Insert a limp dick — pump, pump, pump and TADA! — An impressive erection resulted. There was a rub, however. When the vacuum was eliminated and the cylinder removed the “faux-erection” drained away nearly as quickly as it arrived. It was only a matter of time till our friend, Otto, discovered that ya gotta constrict the flow of blood back into the body once the guy’s peanut was engorged. And that, my friends was the birth of the cockring! Isn’t science amazing?

Good luck

Hey Dr Dick! What’s that toll-free podcast voicemail telephone number?
Why, it’s: (866) 422-5680. DON’T BE SHY, LET IT FLY!

Tiny Teetering Tower of Tremors

Hey sex fans!

It’s Product Review Friday again. Today we feature a review of a second product from Toyfriend.

But wait! You didn’t miss our first Toyfriend review, did you? Well not to worry if you did, because you can find it and all our reviews on DrDickSexToyReviews.com. Use the search function in the header, type in “Coney” and VOILÀ!

Dr Dick Review Crew members, Ken & Denise are here to tell us about their new toy.

Curvy by Toyfriend —— $60.00

Ken & Denise
Denise: “I was so looking forward to playing with Curvy. I love the whimsical shape. It looks like a tiny teetering tower of yellow bubbles. And I loved our colleague, Jada’s review of her Toyfriend toy. But in the end, I was disappointed.”
Ken: “I was disappointed too. But I think we should tell our audience about it anyway, because I believe that the toy’s manufacturer is really on to something and Curvy might be just the perfect vibe for someone who has different needs than us.”curvy-toyfriend-vibrating
Denise: “Exactly! The best thing about Curvy is its shape; it’s bumpy and bright. It’s about 6″ tall with an insertable length of about 4.75″. The next best thing is it’s covered in a delicious skin of 100% medical grade, latex-free, nonporous, phthalate-free, and hypoallergenic silicone. The third best thing is it’s waterproof.”
Ken: “Now, with all that going for it; you may be asking yourself, why were we disappointed. Simply put, it lacks the power we’re used to even with other battery operated vibes.”
Denise: “Despite having five vibration patterns, it never seems to kick into high gear. It teases and tickles more than it titillates. And I suppose that’s fine for some gals, but it’s not so fine for me.”
Ken: “A single button on the bottom of the toy controls the vibrations. Press it once to start the vibrations. Pressing additional times will move it through its five vibration patterns. To turn it off, hold the button down for two seconds. ”
Denise: “I also have a feeling that the curvy design of the Curvy is intended for G-spot stimulation. Herein lies another problem for me; it has no handle to speak of. So holding on to it and directing it to hit my G-spot, particularly with lube on my fingers, is difficult at best. I also wish it were a little longer, because it doesn’t quite reach the spot for me. But I realize that every woman’s anatomy is unique. So what works for some, might not work for others.”
Ken: “Some of the power problems might have to do with the fact it is battery operated and its silicone coat is pretty thick.”
Denise: “Speaking of battery powered, I want to point out the thoughtfulness of the Toyfriend people. They include the first set of 2-AAA batteries already installed in the Curvy. Hurray for that! So all you have to do is discard the little round paper ‘pastie’ that covers the batteries in the battery compartment and you’re ready to go.”
Ken: “The battery compartment is easy to access. The base of the toy unscrews easily and it is as easy to make a watertight seal when you are closing it.”
Denise: “Because it’s both waterproof and made of silicone cleanup couldn’t be easier. Mild soap and warm water does just fine for everyday cleaning. You can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution to sanitize for sharing. After you wipe it down rinse in warm water and let it air dry.”
Ken: “Be sure you only use a water-based lube with a fine silicone-skinned toy like this. A silicone-based lube will mar the finish.”
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

Artistic Pleasure

Hey sex fans!

Welcome to the latest edition of Product Review Friday.

Have you noticed that we’ve been introducing you to a bunch of swell new manufacturers lately? Well if you haven’t ya’ll need to pay closer attention, don’t cha know. Today we continue that trend. We welcome yet another remarkably innovative company to our review effort. Say hello to Fucking Sculptures. This Berkeley California boutique glass studio is crafting eye-popping pleasure instruments so unique that we can hardly contain ourselves.

You’ll be seeing more products from them in the weeks to come, but today Dr Dick Review Crew members, Joy & Dixie are here with our first review.

Corkscrew —— $120

Joy & Dixie
Dixie: “Where does the time go? It’s been over six months since out last review. But this isn’t the first time such an extended hiatus has occurred. Probably when you don’t hear from us for a while it’s because we’re out on the road. When life gets crazy, as it seems to do more frequently lately, Joy and I just hop in our RV and hit the road till we soothe our souls. You’ve heard of dykes on bikes, right? Well we’re dykes in a camper.”
Joy: “A glorified camper, mind you! We used to have this battered old pickup with a pop-top. But now we travel in style. We always meet the nicest people on the road. And on several occasions we’ve even introduced some of our sisters to the latest in sex toys. We like to think of ourselves are roving ambassadors of pleasure.”
Dixie: “We travel light, but not stupid. We always bring a toy or six with us, because, despite our destination, we never leave our libidos at home.”

corkscrew-580x290

Joy: “Even though our RV has a lot of the comforts of home, we think it’s wise to bring at least one toy that don’t involve a motor. And this is where the Corkscrew from Fucking Sculptures comes in. It is made of exquisite soda-lime glass. Honestly, I don’t know a lot about the different kinds of glass other than the fact that this hard and sleek material makes for the ideal insertable.”
Dixie: “We are very fond of glass. In fact, the Corkscrew is our fifth such dildo. At the same time, it is unlike all the others. For one thing, all our other glass insertables we have are clear or with colored swirls in them. They are stunning, of course, but the Corkscrew stands out because it is densely colored; so dense that light won’t penetrate it, except at its tail. Ours is this deep forest green. And here’s a very cool thing about all the fucking art from Fucking Sculptures; you get to choose between five colors and three sizes. That means they well like make one just for you, to your specifications. How cool is that?”
Joy: “And, because each and every one of their sculptures is handcrafted, you can be sure that the insertable you choose will be unique. No one else in the world will have one exactly like yours. That’s art! That’s fucking art! And if you treat your sculpture with the respect it deserves, like you would any fine adult toy, this beauty will last a lifetime.”
Dixie: “Glass is practical as well as stunning. There are no batteries to run down, nothing to recharge. It’s ready when you are. And just think of the bonus feature of it being perfect for sensory play. The Corkscrew can be chilled or warmed. Its hardness holds the temperature beautifully. And unless you’ve tried this kind of play, you have no idea the pleasure it can bring.”
Joy: “Glass is nonporous and hypoallergenic so care and cleaning are a snap. Warm water and mild soap will do for general clean up. However, if you plan to share your glass toy, and they should be shared, I recommend sanitizing it by wiping it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution too. We even ran ours through a dishwasher cycle for no fuss, no muss cleanup.”
Dixie: “The Corkscrew we have is about 7” long with an up curled tail. It weighs in at a hefty 11.5 ounces. I think it’s the ideal toy for helping me with my kegel exercises. The entire insertable is a delicious swirl with its head being about 1.5” in diameter. The curled tail makes it easy to position for intense G-spot stimulation.”
Joy: “Oh, we should mention, for the sake of all our male friends that the Corkscrew makes a wonderful ass play toy too. Your P-spot will thank you. And you’ll never have to worry about it disappearing up your poop-chute; its tail will prevent that.”
Dixie: “You can use any type of lube you choose with glass. And because of its hard and polished surface, only a few drops of lube will be needed.”
Joy: “Remember, the Corkscrew is art, so there’s no need to hide this beauty when it’s not in use. When we’re home it sits proudly on our mantle piece.”
Read Full Review HERE!

ENJOY

Too Big!

Name: Jordan
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Location ?
Hi, I’m a young male aged 18, and recently have become sexually active. I revealed my penis to my girlfriend for the first time and she said that I was too big for her. I am 9in when erect, and 4.5in in girth. Is this too big and if so what procedures are there to make it smaller?
Thanks

This is so precious; I love it. You are so precise with your measurements. I suspect that you pay a lot of attention to what hangs between your legs. Am I right?Sand-Cock

While I want to believe this is a legitimate question from a clueless pup, who is swingin’ some mighty big pipe, I actually have my doubts. If old Jordan here is pulling my leg, it’s ok. It’s been pulled a lot before. On the off chance that this is on the up and up, and our boy is really concerned about the size of his unit vis-à-vis his girlfriend’s equipment, I do have some things to say about how things…even big things…can fit into relatively small places.

But before we get to that, I thought we’d do a little remedial anatomy lesson. Did you know a vulva is made up of the same tissue as your penis and scrotum? In other words your cock and balls are simply a pussy on a stick. So if you follow the logic, Jordan, you’ll find the answer to your query. Pussies come in a variety of sizes shapes, just like cocks & balls.

Ok, so we’re clear on that point, right? Excellent. Now the variation in size and shape of the external components of female genitalia, the vulva, vaginal lips, etc, are only a preview of the amazing capacities of the internal components, the thing itself. A vagina is best understood as a potential space. It is very expandable. It has to be, since whole babies come pushin’ through that space from time to time. Please tell me you’re clear on that concept!

Well-HungAgain if you follow the logic you’ll realize that, just about any adult female vagina is able to accommodate even the really big boys. However, being able to and wanting to be impaled by a giant johnson…well, that’s just a whole other issue, don’t cha know.

Second, and this is a most important point, I wholeheartedly recommend that one day real soon you have a nice long conversation with your GF about her whoha. Do this before you start pokin’ away at this mysterious entity that you clearly don’t understand. There’s a good chance that even your GF doesn’t know her way around down there, so this will be a great experience for your both. Ask her for a little tour of her fine pussy. Have her show you around. Have her point out all the really exciting points of interest…and there are plenty of ‘em. If you think your dick is talented, bub? Let me tell ya, it pales in comparison to a cunt.

Besides, this little exercise will give you a load of brownie points with your GF. You’ll also be a vastly more informed about pussies in general, which hopefully will make you a much better lover whatever comes your way in the future.

Finally, if your GF is concerned about your size it’s incumbent upon you to prove to her that you are an expert cocksmith. That you will make it your business to get her completely turned on before you attempt to administer that 9X5er. Here’s a tip: most women who complain about painful intercourse, regardless of the size of their partner’s hose, report that their offish partners don’t get them warmed up enough before commencing the fuck. No arousal means there’s no lubrication. No lubrication means there’s sure to be painful fucking ahead…even if you’ve got a puny pipe to swing. Get it?dick-tater

A word to the wise, Jordan, if a guy’s dick is hard it’s evidence that he’s aroused. If his partner isn’t lubricating big-time then she not aroused. Which tells me that the guy didn’t take care of business like he should have before he started to poke and prod with his one-eyed monster.

You want in? Better pave the way pup! And this will certainly include lots of a high-quality personal lubricant. Don’t know which one to choose? Check out my adult products review site, DrDickSexToyReviews. Look for the CATEGORY pull-down menu in the side bar; scroll down till your find the category — LUBE and presto!

Good luck

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