Name: Daniel
Gender: Male
Age: 22
Location: Portland
My question is do all women essentially have the same size and shape vagina? Because I have an abnormally large penis and some women are fine with it but some women complain way too much because of the pain.

I’m gonna go way out on a limb here and guess that you don’t really know how to swing that big pipe of yours. But before we get to that, I thought we’d do a little remedial anatomy lesson. Did you know a vagina is made up of the same tissue as your penis and scrotum? In other words your cock and balls are simply a pussy on a stick. So if you follow the logic you’ll find the answer to your question. Pussies come in a variety of sizes shapes, just like cocks & balls.

Ok, so we’re clear on that point, right? Excellent. Now the variation in size and shape of the external components of female genitalia, the vulva, vaginal lips, etc, are only a preview of the amazing capacities of the internal components, the vagina itself. This is best understood as a potential space. A vagina is very expandable. It has to be, since whole babies come pushin’ through that space. Tell me you’re clear on that concept…please!

Again if you follow the logic you’ll realize that, unless you’re hung in a freakish sort of way (and if you are I want photographic evidence sent to me immediately) just about any adult female vagina is able to accommodate even the really big boys. However, being able to and wanting to be impaled by a giant johnson…well, that’s just a whole other issue.

Second, and this is the most important point, I wholeheartedly recommend that one day real soon you have a nice long conversation with someone who actually owns a vagina. While dr dick is a very clever lad, who knows lots of things about lots of things, sadly he don’t have no vagina himself. So why not go directly to the source, Daniel? Before you start pokin’ away at this mysterious entity that you clearly don’t understand, ask your partner for a little tour. Have her show you around. Have her point out all the really exciting points of interest…and there are plenty of ‘em, don’t cha know. You’ll be sorely amazed. You think your dick is talented? Let me tell ya pal, it pales in comparison to a pussy.

Besides, this little exercise will give you a load of brownie points with the woman in question. You’ll also be a vastly more informed about pussies in general, which hopefully make you a much better lover whatever comes your way in the future.

Finally, if your women partners are complaining about your size it probably has more to do with your ability as a cocksmith than the capacity of their vagina. Most women who complain about painful intercourse, regardless of the size of the hose, report that their offish male partners don’t get them warmed up enough before commencing the fuck. No arousal means there’s lubrication no. No lubrication means there’s sure to be painful fucking ahead. Get it?

A word to the wise, Daniel, if your dick is hard it’s evidence that you’re properly aroused. If your partner isn’t lubricating big-time then she not properly aroused. Which tells me that you didn’t take care of business like you should have before you start to poke and poke with your one-eyed monster. You want in? Better pave the way pup!

Name: sammy
Gender: male
Age: 19
Location: UK
is rimming dangerous you know like not good for you and you know stuff like that

You wanna know if rimming (or ass to mouth contact, for those less familiar with the term “rimming”) is dangerous with respect to “you know…well you know”. That sure was articulate.

I guess you want dr dick to fill in the blanks, huh? Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think you want to know about the health risks involved in rimming, right? Why not just come right out and say, “Hey dr dick, is eatin’ ass gonna make me sick?”

Let me preface my remarks with this universal statement. There is some risk involved with everything we do. Are you breathing this air? Are you drinking this water? Are you eating this food? Are you driving a car? Yikes, especially here in Seattle? Then you are at risk of serious bodily injury.

Have you noticed the alarming increase in health advisories issued for air quality? The ever-increasing frequency of food contamination scares — both for humans and our pets? And I’m sure I don’t have to call your attention to worsening traffic and the endless parade of really bad drivers out there. And yet, we continue to breathe, eat and move about in traffic as if there were no risks to us at all. We do so because it’s hard to live a normal life without. Rather than wall ourselves up somewhere to avoid all the inherent dangers of life in the modern world, we do our best to minimize risk by keeping ourselves informed and staying alert to signs of danger.

The same is true for any and all risks associated with sex. Trust me, I’m not here to diminish any perceived health risk involved when folks bump parts with one another. But I do want to put them in perspective. You can minimize health risks associated with sexual contact with others by being alert and informed about sexual issues in general and the health of your partner(s) in particular. Also stay vigilant to signs of danger — lesions, inflammations, abnormal odors, pain — are all warning signs that things are not as they should be. And nothing, absolutely nothing is more important than hygiene…especially were butt munching is concerned.

Here’s a little code I’ve prepared for this purpose. You know, like the fun rainbow colored homeland security code we’ve all come to know love. However, unlike the Department of Homeland Security here in the US (and whatever the call it there in the UK), dr dick promises he’ll never use his advisory code as a political tool. The dr dick Health/Sex Risk Code is simple. 1) Advised — 2) Advised with Minimal Risk — 3) Advised with Caution and 4) Not Advisable.

Now back to you, Sammy. dr dick is gonna label rimming — 3) Advised with Caution. There’s a minimal risk for HIV transmission. However the presence of anal bleeding or bloody gums makes rimming 4) Not Advisable.

Rimming does carry the risk of parasite and bacterial infections. Hepatitis is also a risk. But there are hepatitis vaccines out there. And anyone engaged in sex with another human being, eating ass or no, who isn’t immunized against hep is just a damn fool.

Name: Frank
Gender: Male
Age: 28
Location: LA
The problem I’m having is that my current girlfriend has really small breasts, probably a size A or something like that. My last girlfriend had these beautiful big breasts. Being in LA of course they were fake, but I loved them. My new girlfriend is good in bed but the boob issue is driving me crazy. Her breasts are so small there’s nothing to do with them. The rest of her body is fine and her face is great. I’m looking for your advice. I want to ask her to get a boob job, but I don’t know how to approach the issue. Just looking for your advice.

So let me get this straight, Frank. You’re like this big tit fanatic and you don’t much care if the hooters are god-made or plastic. You live in LA, the very center of the silicone universe. And you find yourself in a relationship with a great gal with natural breasts, but virtually no bust line. Holy cow, how did that happen? Is this some kind of twisted karmic fate thing playing itself out? Do you suppose the cosmos is trying to tell you something?

Ok, you want my advice, here it is. I totally think you ought march right up to this pretty sweet girlfriend of yours and tell her that despite her many charms and how much fun she is in the sack, you’re simply need much bigger tits on her real soon.

That’s right you heard me correctly. You just stride on up to her and tell her what’s on your mind. Don’t hold anything back. Don’t try to be diplomatic. And you don’t even have to give her feelings a second thought!

Of course, Frank, you’re gonna wanna preface this little declaration of yours by telling the lovely lass that you will submit your dick for augmentation if she agrees to submits her breasts.

I mean, fair is fair, right Frank? To do anything less, would mark you as incredibly shallow and selfish. It would also smack of a very unpleasant double standard. And dr dick wants desperately to believe that you’re not that big of an asshole. You aren’t, are you Frank?

If by chance you’re not quite ready to surrender you’re dick to a surgeon’s scalpel, with all the inherent dangers major surgery like this entails, then you’re in no position to ask your darling girlfriend with the tiny titties to do it either.

Here’s a tip; either enjoy what’s near to hand or find some chick that’s already sporting a big rack. I encourage you not to suggest to any woman that she’d be a better person, or more desirable to you (or anyone jackass of your gender) if she were just more stacked. This will simply backfire. You’ll not only find yourself without the desired tits, you’ll be without pussy too.

Good luck ya’ll!

While I want ya’ll to know that I’m delighted to hear from each and every one of you, particularly those of you from the far-flung corners of the globe, there’s just so much I can offer by way of advice.

Often, the best I can do is offer some generic information about one thing or another, then suggest that if the concerns persist, that person ought to seek professional help nearer to hand than me. So regardless how many people write in with further questions, the only thing I can do is repeat myself. (See below for examples.)

Others write to me with a pressing problem, but fail to include enough information for me to advise them properly. Thus I find myself asking more questions of them than they do of me.

Name: glen
Gender:
Age: 42
Location: Santa Ana CA
Is it possible to give coitus to a vagina while another man’s penis stays inside the same vagina?

Yep, you betcha! It’s called double penetration, DP for short.

Name: y
Gender:
Age: 35
Location: India
Will breasts become bigger due to having sex?

Not from just having sex, darling! But if you get pregnant from having sex, you can rest assured that your boobs will get larger then.

Name: aamir khan
Gender:
Age: 22
Location: pakistan
hi sir… i have a problem when i talk to girls so there will b little cum going from my penis. and i m dischargig vry soon. so whts dis??? and wht shold i do??

I do believe you are referring to what is commonly called “pre-cum”. This clear alkaline fluid produced by your Cowper’s gland during sexual arousal lubricates and neutralizes the acidity of the urethra that will soon carry your jizz, with its payload of up to five hundred million sperm. Your urine, which also passes through this shared tube, leaves your urethra acidic. And if your body didn’t neutralize the acidity before you shot your wad, all your sperm would die.

Name: Jim
Gender:
Age: 50
Location: Portland
I have red balls! I have noticed many porn fellows with similar red balls, but I do not find this condition attractive. I have tried fungicides and hydrocortisone. I try to keep my crotch dry, even using cornstarch powder after a shower. Any advice?

RED BALLS? I’ve heard of blue balls, but not red balls, per se. Porn fellows often have red balls because their cockring is too tight or they have been using one for too long.

Your problem sounds, however, like a bad case of jock itch. That’s no fun! Jock itch is a pretty common fungal infection of the groin and upper thighs. If you’re using an over the counter antifungal cream and a cornstarch-based powder to keep things dry down there, and you’re still having a problem, SEE YOUR DOCTOR!

You may simply need a pharmaceutical grade fungicide. Or you could have scabies.

Name: james
Gender:
Age: 31
Location: CA
hi, i am not getting proper erection while intercourse,,,got recently married what shud i do?

I need more information! Are you not aroused enough before you start the fuck? Can you get fully hard when you jerk off? Were you a virgin when you married? This must be a bummer for a newly weds.

Name: Jim Beans
Gender:
Age: 24
Location:
What pornographic resources are available for blind folk? Do you have any suggestions?

Have you tried SexAudia.com? Besides being able to hear my weekly podcast on SexAudia.com, you can hear loads of other hot and steamy erotic stories, music and other entertainment. Check it out. Tell ‘em Dr Dick sent you.

Name: Mohan
Gender:
Age: 30
Location: Malaysia
can i have children with my hypospadias condition? Should i get an operation?

I have no way of knowing how severe your hypospadias is, or if it might interfere with you having children. SEE YOUR DOCTOR! Although, if you’ve lived with this condition for 30 years, it can’t be too severe, right? Corrective surgery is a last resort and should only be considered in the most severe cases.

Name: john
Gender:
Age: 31
Location: new zealand
Hello doc .i have hypospadias and my dick is only 3 inch if fully erect..pls advice me.

That’s small, for sure. But 3” erect is not uncommonly small. There’s not much a fellow can do about tiny meat, except learn to love it and let it give you all the joy it can. Not much you can do about the hypospadias either. But since you’ve lived you’ve lived with your dick this way for 31 years, you probably know all of this already, huh?

Name: jake
Gender:
Age: 16
Location: Grove City
im at 6 inches and I wanna get to 7 or a lil lower how can i do this? could i get pills at this age? and if so what should i get?

You could leave it the fuck alone till you finish puberty at least. You could also be happy with what you have, because some folks, like the guy above you, would be delighted to be as hung as you.

BTW, there are no pills that work for growing a dick longer. Wake up, puppy!

Name: sheema
Gender
Age: 41
Location:
hi dr, i am 41yers old lesbo mom. i love lesbian sex. i have 4kids. one dughter and 3 sons. my sons ages is 22 18 12. my dughter age is 16yers. i have one girlfriend for sex. my girlfriend come my home and we make sex. one day we having sex then my dughter see us. she ask me what you doing with aunt. i dont tell her. but in my mind a idea. i want having lesbian sex with my dughter. tell me what shold i do. plase.

SERIOUSLY! A forty-one year old woman, and a mother of four, needs to ask if it’s ok to have lesbian sex with her underage daughter? Get otta of here!

What kind of mother are you? If your daughter wants to dabble in muff-divin’, let her play with someone her own age.

Incest, particularly the adult to child type, is considered taboo in nearly every culture, both past and present. There’s plenty of good reason for this. While lesbian sex doesn’t involve the genetic concerns (inbreeding); it would involve the most devastating aspect of incest — the secrecy. No one violates this universal taboo in the open. The secrecy and the inevitable shame and guilt will, sure as shootin’, destroy you family dynamic.

People, if you find yourself in a seductive situation with family member, don’t give in to the temptation.

Good luck everyone!

DR DICK’S PODCAST PREMIERS TODAY

Hey sex fans,

My very first podcast is ready to rock and roll…your world! SWEET!

• Frank needs bigger tits!
• Daniel #1 has big meat; does he need to find a bigger pussy?
• Daniel #2 is about to chow down on some butt-hole

(What’s up with all the friggin’ Daniels?)

• George is not sure about his girlfriend’s cookies.

And finally,

• Alicia gives her queer brother a Valentine!

BE THERE, OR BE SQUARE!

This podcast is brought to you by Daddy Oohhh! Productions; Quality Adult Entertainment, Enrichment and Education.