Category Archives: Body Issues

The Little Engine That Could

Name: Terri
Gender: Female
Age: 24
Location: ND
I’m having a problem with knowing when I am feeling an orgasm. I feel like I have to fake it around my husband because I am unsure. Sometimes when I’m alone I just feel like I have to go to the bathroom so I stop myself and then other times I feel like my legs are paralyzed but that’s it. I don’t ever feel like I’m sexually stimulated. Just tired. Any ideas as to what I am doing or not doing or what might be causing it?

I’m gonna go way out on a limb here and guess that your are, what we in the business call, preorgasmic. My experience tells me that if you’ve actually had an orgasm, you’d know it. All the symptoms you list — feel like you have pee; feel like your legs are paralyzed; or just plain exhausted, don’t sound orgasmic to me.

clitoral anatomyI can’t actually say I know what you are doing wrong, if anything. You don’t really go into detail on how you pleasure yourself. But I will hazard a guess as to what is causing this. And that would be inadequate stimulation to your pleasure centers.

Even in this day and age where sexually laden messages abound in the popular culture, there are still some women, even young women, who are unversed about orgasms in general and how they could go about getting one for themselves in particular.

Orgasms don’t always come easily for some women, and that’s a fact. I suppose there are as many reasons for this as there are preorgasmic women. A woman’s pleasure center (her clit) is more subtle and less obvious than a man’s raging boner. Women are socialized about sexuality — even nowadays — in a much different way then men are. Men have more cultural permissions to be sexually adventuresome than do women. And if the truth be told, us men folk, — we don’t need no stinkin’ permission to get our self off!clit

The basic formula for achieving an orgasm is acquainting yourself with your pussy. Map out all the points of interest. Find out what feels good, and repeat it. The object of this first step is not to stress about having an orgasm it’s all about reconnecting with your cunt.

The more you know about this marvelous part of you the better you’re gonna be at slammin yourself a screamin’ meme when the time comes. Knowing your way around your pussy is also gonna be helpful in partnered sex, especially if your partners are men.

The first part of this exercise is called a self-sexological exam. Get a hand mirror and find a really detailed diagram of female genitalia on the internet. Using the diagram as a guide, work at familiarizing yourself and making friends with your pussy. Once you are certain you know all the parts, I want you to do a detailed touch test. I want you to test for sensitivity very square inch of your body from your asshole to your navel. I want you to draw pictures of your own cunt and surrounding area, then color them to represent the levels of sensitivity — red being the hottest and most pleasurable areas to blue being the more neutral areas and all the colors in-between. I encouraged you to try this exercise with both a wet hand and a dry hand. I suggest a nice personal lubricant for your wet hand exploration. Spend at least 30 minutes a day for three consecutive days on this home-play. You have a lot of reacquainting to do, don’t cha know. And this is private time; your partner(s) is not invited.

hitachi-magic-wandThe next step in your home-play will include a vibrator. If you don’t already have one, shop for one. There are plenty of suggestions for vibes on my product reviews site: DrDickSexToyReviews.com. (There’s a vast array of pleasure products on that site and all the guesswork has been eliminated. The Dr Dick Review Crew painstakingly reviewed each product so that you’ll be able to see what’s hot and what’s not.)

Now using the pictures you created of your genitals in part one of this exercise, I want you to kick-start that vibrator, throw it into first gear and start making small lazy circles around the blue areas, and work your way to the bright red areas. Do this privately for 30 minutes for three consecutive days or until there was a breakthrough.

The next step is masturbation. You may have tried it before without success, that’s ok. This time you’ll be better informed about all the hot spots of your cooch that you learned in step one. I’m a big fan of full body masturbation. So while you’re diddlin’ yourself spread the sexual energy all over your body — tits, ass, feet, mouth, whatever.Aloe Cadabra

Vary your technique: stroke, pinch, pat, massage, and rub yourself all over. Vary your breathing, gyrate your hips, listen to sexy music, rent some porn, watch yourself in a mirror, or throw in some Kegel exercises. Try a wet hand. Play with yourself in the bath. Hell, dance around naked with a jewel in your navel…whatever it takes.

Many women experience their first orgasm with the help of a vibrator. I encourage you to be adventuresome and experiment with one too. Try a dildo or another sex toy.

Be sure to keep a journal during this exploratory period. This will help you later to bridge the gap in communicating with your partner(s).

Finally, Terri, I want to turn you on to a fantastic website, www.Clitical.com. This is a one-stop shop for all things relating to female sexuality.

Good luck

What just happened?

Name: Selena
Gender: Female
Age: 37
Location:
I have been with the same man for 17 years now. Although he is not the only man I have been with he is most definitely the best. I suppose mostly that’s due to having years to experiment and practice, etc. Anyway, I have always had amazing orgasms all of which require clitoral stimulation regardless of position but the other night I had a gusher; I squirted a lot! He was inside me and I was using my vibrator. And when I got off, there was only this one big release, but there was so much fluid it made a spot on the bed twice the size of a large softball, maybe even larger. At first, I thought it was him until he asked if I was okay and that’s when I felt this warm honey-like feeling fill me. I have never had this happen before and would like to know if it’s normal or not to, all of a sudden, have an orgasm like that? Quite frankly I am not impressed for the fact that it was only 1 big release instead of my usual orgasm where I often climax for up to 2 minutes. And should I be embarrassed? What if his face had been down there? Thanks for your help

I’m so glad to hear that you have been having lots of amazing orgasms, Selena. Good for you! However, it The Amazing G-spotseems to me that you’ve wandered into some new and uncharted orgasmic territory with the one you describe. In fact, it sounds like you’ve had your first ejaculation. There’s nothing abnormal about it, although it’s not all that common.

And why would you be embarrassed to have had an ejaculation while your partner was eating you out?  Hasn’t your man ever busted his nut on your face?  Isn’t it the same thing?  I say, yes.  And no man ever apologizes for that stunt.

There is a lot of controversy about female ejaculation. Well-meaning people in and out of the sex community continue to debate the topic. Women and men, scientists, clinicians, academicians, scientists, and lay people all have very strong opinions that they don’t mind insisting are that last word on the subject. And yet the debate continues to rage. I find that curious. But so much about human sexuality remains controversial. That probably says more about our culture than about sex, but you I’ll bet you know that already.

Anyhow, I’ve written a bit about female ejaculation on my site, there are some podcasts that discuss the topic too. Use the CATEGORY pull-down menu in the sidebar to your right and scroll down till you find ‘Female Ejaculation.’ It’s near the top under the heading, BODY ISSUES.

This is the sort of thing you will discover.

Name: T
Gender: Female
Age: 46
Location: Canada
Do you have any suggestions about FE, I believe I have one once and it was total bliss. But achieving it again is quite another thing.

FE??? Are you talkin’ Female Ejaculation, darlin’? Ok, let’s start with a little background.female genital anatomy

The G-spot (or Grafenberg Spot after the physician who first wrote about it) or Skene’s gland is a small area of spongy tissue just behind the front wall of the vagina, between the back of the pubic bone and the cervix. This is analogous tissue to the male prostate. In fact, the G-spot is sometimes referred to as the female prostate. But like most things sexual, particularly if it has to do with female sexuality, there’s a lot of debate about whether the G-Spot is the same thing as the female prostate. I intend to steer clear of that controversy as much as possible.

In short, what I can tell you for sure is that during early fetal development all fetuses start out being potentially female. This does not change until a male fetus begins to produce its own hormones around the eighth week of gestation. Only then does the physical development of the male and female bodies diverge. Of course, this necessitates that all fetuses initially have structures that could develop into either male or female reproductive and sexual organs. This means the tissue that develops into the male prostate gland must also be present in females. Get it? Got it? Good!

Many women report that their G-area is more sensitive to stimulation than other parts of their internal genitals. To find your very own G-spot, put two fingers in your pussy and curve them upwards, like toward your belly. Now make a “come here” motion, stroking the upper wall of your vagina with a firm, upward pressure. Feel that? That’s your G-spot, darlin’! How fun is this?

female ejaculationFingering yourself like this will probably be more pleasurable if you’re already aroused. Some women have orgasms and/or ejaculate from G-spot stimulation, but not all women ejaculate and not all women find G-spot stimulation pleasurable…wouldn’t ya just know it!

Some women report that they feel like they need to pee when their G-Spot is stimulated. Therefore, I suggest, that before you go rootin’ around in your pussy lookin’ for your g-spot, that you completely empty your bladder. Oh and make sure your fingers are well lubricated throughout your exploration. Even if you have a lot of your own vaginal lubrication, I always suggest the use of a water-based lubricant to augment your own juices.

As an aside, we all know that post-menopausal women experience bouts of vaginal dryness, but even younger women have dry episodes, especially if they are taking antihistamines or antidepressants.

If ya want to hit your G-spot while fucking, may I suggest you try “the woman-on-top — cowgirl” position or the “doggy” position. These are best because your partner’s dick (or strap-on) will be better situated to hit the front wall of your pussy.

***Guys, most women need firmer pressure to the front of their pussy to have a G-Spot orgasm. This might best be accomplished by quick strokes and a lot of deeper friction. But let your partner be your guide.

Like I mentioned earlier, G-Spot stimulation may cause you to ejaculate a small amount of white or clear fluid. Some women produce more ejaculate than others. Just remember, the gushers…the ones you see in porno movies…are faked for your viewin’ pleasure. I mean, come on; some of these videos would scare the fuck out of Noah!

Enjoy your exploration, T. Like I always say, the more you know about the mysterious workin’s of your own personal pussy the more information you’ll be able to share with your own personal partners.

If you’re looking for a swell ‘how to video’ look to Dr Dick’s How To Video Library. Click HERE to see what I found when I did a quick search for ‘female ejaculation’ in my How To Video Library.

Good luck

Trouble Down Below

Name: Marcus
Gender: Male
Age: 20
Location: New Jersey
I have a problem that is really fucking with my head, causing all sorts of performance anxiety and, long story short; I’m still a virgin at age 20. And because of it, a few failed sexual encounters. I can get a raging boner when I’m wacking off alone, but I feel humiliated by my dick whenever I get the chance to show it off. I have what’s known as a “skin bridge.” I’ve asked a doctor about plastic surgery to correct it, and he told me it originated when my circumcision didn’t heal correctly. (And the statute of limitations to sue the bastard expired long before I knew he was at fault.) Anyway, now I’m looking at a choice between this freakish tunnel of skin that goes halfway around my cock and a different, who-knows-what-kind-of-hideous scar might result from a second surgery. The situation is ruining my life. Maybe it’s the root of some psychological complex driving me toward homosexuality too, but don’t worry about that. If I still can’t get it up for a girl after I find some peace of mind on this issue, then I’ll drop the bi attitude and come out as gay no problem. What’s your two cents on the surgery? I realize this might be one of your toughest questions to date.

This isn’t a particularly tough question at all. And you want my two cents? Here it is: get over it! I mean, pup, really? Skin bridges from botched circumcisions are not particularly uncommon. In fact, I know two guys right here in Seattle who have the very same thing and one is a former porn star. Trust me, his skin bridge did not get in the way of him waving his thang all over the place, don’t cha know.keep-calm-and-don-t-be-a-dick

Here’s a tip: stay away from the surgeon. More cutting on your willie ain’t the answer.

Here’s the thing, if, when you drop trou, and your audience, male or female, gets a gander at your johnson; and they point and shriek, “OMG, that thing is hideous! Please, please, please put it away;” then I think you’ve got a legitimate problem. However, if no one does that, ever, then your shame and humiliation is all in your head. You’ve probably created a mountain out of a molehill. But, if by chance, you think I’m being unfair, or cavalier about your concern, then take a photo of your hideously deformed wiener and send it to me for my evaluation.

Now there are two ways to go in this instance. The first option is to grow up and realize that your “condition,” if you can call it that, falls within the natural variance of dick size and shape. The second option is to capitalize on the very thing that makes you different. Ya know how some guys have their dick pierced and then put a ring or rod through the piercing, just to doll things up a bit? Well, you already have a natural piercing. Why not take your cock down to your local piercing parlor and get it fitted for a nice piece of genital jewelry. Then you can say with pride that you adorned what you once though as a defect and made your cock even more beautiful than it was before.

Finally I have to ask; what’s up with the…if I don’t get this fixed; I’m gonna go all queer. You think gay guys are less self-conscious about their equipment than straight men? If ya do, you are living in a dream world, darling.

Good luck

Tricks Of The Trade — Part 3

Today I return to a series I started back in October. (You can Find the first two parts of this series HERE and HERE!) As you may recall from back then, a friend of mine, who is writing a book about male sexuality for women, asked me if I could be her go-to-guy for a bunch of questions she had about pleasuring a man which she wants to include in her book. I think it is only fair that you, my loyal audience, should get this information before anyone else does.

COCK & BALLS

Does the concept of blue balls really exist? (With all of the tantric activity that goes on, I assume it’s more of a myth than anything else, but we would love to hear otherwise if I’m wrong!)BlueBalls

Yep, it’s slang for an actual condition — congested prostate or vasocongestion caused by prolonged sexual arousal. A dude’s balls and prostate will ache if an ejaculation/orgasm doesn’t dissipate the trapped blood that fills the vessels in his cock and surrounding genital area during sexual arousal.

During sexual arousal, a guys balls can increase in size 25-50 percent. This is particularly true for younger men; wouldn’t you just know it.

Are there any “secret spots” on the male body that we should know about, that aren’t on the penis or in the butt?

You know those two things on a guy’s chest? I think they’re called nipples. Some men’s nipples are hot wired to their dick. I know several men who are orgasmic through nipple play alone. Any man can learn to sensitize and find pleasure in their nipples or other parts of their body as well.

Are there any magical/mystical techniques that gay men have mastered that straight women should know about?

floppy critterThere sure are, but us gay men are sworn to secrecy about this. And I’m not about to break this sacred code of silence. However, every straight woman should have a good gay male friend that she can ask about things like this. Most gay men are not as discreet about this as I am. They will gladly tell you what they do to pleasure their men if you ask them. Get a gay friend, if you don’t already have one, and have the talk. You will be amazed.

What exactly is the Frenulum? Is there any biological purpose to it? Why is it so sensitive? And what should a girl do with it?

Actually a frenulum is a small fold of skin tissue that prevents an organ in the body from moving to far from a particular location. There are frenula at several points of the body, including several in the mouth, some in the digestive tract, a couple in the vagina, and, my favorite, the one on a guy’s cock.

This is an elastic band of tissue under the dickhead that connects to the foreskin, and helps cover the dickhead when not aroused. Sadly, the frenulum can be partially or even totally removed during circumcision.

Think of the frenulum as a guy’s feeble excuse for a clit. It’s loaded with nerve endings. If a chick wants to know what to do with a frenulum, all she has to do is ask herself what she likes having done to her clit.

Any tricks of the trade on what a gal should do with a man’s testicles? Anything that will really drive him wild?by the balls

Loads of guys like having their balls stretched. Guys have been stretching their balls for just about as long as us men folk have had balls to stretch…and that’s a mighty long time. The only thing that screams male virility and potency as much as a big dick is a pair of big low hangin’ nuts. In fact in many societies throughout history a man’s cajones were considered sacred. They were revered as objects of religious, social, cultural, and even magical power. In fact in ancient Rome, when a man would take an oath he would grab his balls, just like we put our hand on a bible today. In fact, some etymologists believe that’s where we got the word, “testify,” from the Latin: testis.

Men discovered early on that ball stretching was both erotic fun and relatively easy to do. Just to clarify…when I say ball stretching, what I really mean is sack (scrotum) stretching. One cannot really increase the size of his balls (testicles). Soon men in many societies were stretching their junk to call attention to their manliness. With the help of a stretching device of one sort or another, and there are several, men were able to lengthen their balls with very little effort.

A gal can help a guy do this. The simplest method, and you don’t even need no stinkin’ equipment for this, is called the manual method. All ya do is give your man’s huevos a nice sustained tug. Alternate your tugging with some nice ball massage. Over time this will help to lengthen his ball sack because you’re manually forcing it downward. The more you pull and the longer you pull, the more you will affect the hang of your guy’s balls. It’s also pretty sexually stimulating too.

This method is particularly effective after a hot bath or shower. His skin will be at its most pliable then. This method is safe and effective and even a rank amateur can pull it off, so to speak. This’ll be fun and pleasurable all on its one. Your guy will love that you are paying his balls some attention while you’re jerkin or suckin him off. And that will make him and his nuts much happier.

What are your thoughts on circumcision? We’ve read that it actually can cut off important nerve endings — is there any truth behind this?

Foreskin HugI am completely opposed to infant circumcision. It is genital mutilation. And yes, it can and often does remove important nerve endings. (See question 4 above and read below.)

As to adult circumcision, I need to say one thing from the outset. It’s a particularly thorny issue for me. I firmly believe in the right of an adult to augment, adorn and embellish, or in any other way customize his or her body. Just as long as that person has taken enough time to think it through. At the same time I am a furious proponent of genital integrity. So you see my conflict.

There are, of course, medical reasons for adult circumcision.

Take a really close look at a foreskin. I mean a really close look. What do you see? Veins, right? If you pinch a foreskin between your thumb and forefinger as hard as you can; what happens? OUCH! Ya know why that is? A foreskin is just chock-full of nerve endings, darlin’. A foreskin contains about 240 feet of nerve fibers and tens of thousands of specialized nerve endings, which can feel the slightest pressure, the lightest touch, the smallest motion, the subtlest changes in temperature, and the finest gradations in texture.

In many ways, a foreskin is just like one’s eyelid. It covers, cleans, and protects a guy’s dickhead just like one’s eyelid covers, cleans, and protects one’s eye. A foreskin keeps the surface of a guy’s dickhead healthy, clean, shiny, warm, soft, moist, and sensitive. And there are a whole lot of us who think a foreskin is totally hot.

A foreskin is a specialized, sensitive, and functional organ of touch. No other part of the body serves the same purpose. Besides, if it’s cut off, it’ll remove 50% of the skin of the cock.

Finally, I’m of the mind that millions of years of evolution has provided men a covering for our dickhead for a purpose. And to remove it is simply unnatural.

Hers and Hers, Part 1

Hey sex fans!

It’s Product Review Friday! And we’re comin’ down to the last two reviews of the year. Both this week and next we will feature a Zini vibe. You are following these reviews, right? If not, I suggest that you do because they are doing some remarkable stuff. You can find all our reviews by going to drdicksextoyreviews.com, use the search function in the sidebar and type in “Zini.”

Dr Dick Review Crew partners, Joy & Dixie, are here to tell us about today’s pleasure product and they will return next week to review our last toy of the year too.

Zini Zook —— $150.00

Joy & Dixie
Dixie: “So the reason that Joy and I are up two weeks in a row is that we have two very similar vibes to tell you about. They are both Zini vibes. They are virtually twins in concept—stylized rabbit vibes; the only difference between the two is contours of the pleasure points. If this seems a little vague at the moment, don’t worry, we’ll clear it up for you.”zook 01
Joy: “The two vibes in question are the Zook, today’s review, and the Hua, which we will tell you about next week.”
Dixie: “The Zook is a pleasure to look at and handle. Its sculptured, relatively slim shaft is vaguely reminiscent of a bamboo shoot and the clit stimulator is reminiscent of a bamboo leaf. The vibe is covered in a luscious, high-quality, latex-free, nonporous, phthalate-free, and hypoallergenic silicone. You will want to use a fine water-based lube with the Zook, of course. Because you know that using a silicone-based lube with a silicone toy is a no-no, right? It will mar the finish. The Zook comes in three different colors, mine is dark wine.”
Joy: “The Zook employs two motors, which deliver five speeds and fifteen vibrating functions. The vibrations are the buzzy kind not the rumbling kind. And, like so many of the other Zini products the Dr Dick Review Crew has reviewed, it features a three-button control panel that is easy to use and understand. The “+” button turns on the vibe and accelerates the speed through its five settings. The “-” button decelerates the speed and turns off the vibe. The round button between the other two rotates through the pulsation modes. Every press of the button makes the Zook flash a different color. And it is remarkably quiet.”product_zook_04
Dixie: “I noticed while using the Zook that the vibrations are equally strong in the handle as it is in the insertable end. This may be a problem for some women, particularly older women have very sensitive hands.”
Joy: “Yes, it wasn’t a problem for me either, but you make a good point.”
Dixie: “The two other features that make this vibe so special are it is waterproof and rechargeable. This delights me no end. Another recent Zini review revealed that one of their other high-end vibes, the Roae, wasn’t waterproof and so it didn’t get as praise worthy a review as our review.”
Joy: “The Zook comes with a USB recharging cable. It takes a couple of hours to fully charge the unit and you get several hours of pleasuring on a charge. Another thoughtful feature is the travel lock. No surprises when you travel with this beauty.”
Dixie: “The fact that Zook is made of silicone and its fully waterproof makes it so easy to clean. Mild soap and warm water does just fine for everyday cleaning. But you can also wipe it down with a lint-free towel moistened with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution to sanitize for sharing. And it should be shared!”
Joy: “Each of our colleagues on the Dr Dick Review Crew, who have had the good fortune to review one of the Zini products, has called attention to the esthetically pleasing packaging. Dixie and I concur; it’s really very nice and ready for gift giving. Heck, it even comes with a very elegant drawstring storage pouch.”
Dixie: “I want to call attention to the recharge port, which is sealed with a watertight plug. Take care to ensure that the plug is set good and tight before submerging it in the bath…YUM!…or when cleaning.”product_zook_01
Joy: “Zook is the more girthy of the two vibes. The Hua, which will be reviewed next week, is sleeker. Zook’s leaf-shaped clitoral stimulator is more flexible than its sister, the Hua. This flexibility has its advantages and disadvantages. It’s soft to the touch, and if your clit is super sensitive, that might work for you. But if you’re used bearing down with some pressure on your clit, then this may be frustrating. I know I say this every time we review one of these stylized rabbit vibes, but it bears repeating. The one size or one shape fits all concept is a fiction. But then again, maybe that’s why there are so many styles and shapes out there. The trick is for each of us it to find precisely the right one that will pleasure us. And there are so many variables — insertable length, curve of the shaft, length of the clit vibe, and on and on.”
Dixie: “We wholehearted recommend the Zook, particularly for a woman new to vaginal and clitoral stimulation. We also want to let you know that the Zook is just as handy and pleasurable in your butt. So all you guys out there experimenting with anal sex, you will enjoy it too.”
Joy: “Let’s recap, shall we? Zook is body-safe, healthy, GREEN, rechargeable, waterproof, moderately powerful, and super quiet. The sad thing is, it’s not available anywhere in North America that we know of.”
Full Review HERE!

ENJOY!

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