Hey sex fans,
So here we go with Part 4 of our LELO reviews (and we still have three more to go). If you somehow missed the previous installments, use the search function to the right. Type in LELO, and presto!
Jack & Karen do the honors
ELISE —— $169
Jack & Karen
Karen: “Finally we’ve got our hands on a LELO. We were beginning to wonder who we had to fuck to get in on the LELO action around here.”
Jack: “Like my daddy always said, ‘Ya gotta walk through a lot of manure before you find the pony.’”
Karen: “The ELISE is way better than a pony!
This black beauty (ours is black) is made from medical grade silicone. It’s just short of 10” long with just about 5” insertable length. It’s got a sweet curve to it and its torpedo-shaped. I like that shape because it looks just like Jack’s thingy.”
Jack: “Thingy? My THINGY? She’s such a grownup.”
Karen: “Sorry, that didn’t come out like I hoped. Jack’s cock is torpedo-shaped and it curves, to the left. Is that better, honey?”
Jack: “Yes dear, that’s better. It’s just that I never heard you use “thingy” before.
Ok, on with our review. The ELISE has 5 stimulation modes and 5 speeds. It’s super quiet. It’s also rechargeable; so there’s no stinkin’ batteries to buy.”
Karen: “The Scandinavian designers of the ELISE clearly had the woman user in mind when they developed this vibe. When I use it by myself, for G-spot stimulation, the controls are right where they should be, in the handle were I see and can reach them. There are also two, count them, two points of vibration — one in the tip, another in the shaft.”
Jack: “The ELISE comes with the elegant signature LELO high-end packaging. It’s a gift just waiting to be given.”
Karen: “But be sure to use only water-based lube with this silicone vibe.”
Jack: “And be careful that you don’t get any lube (or water, when you’re cleaning up) in the recharging port.”
Karen: “That’s the only drawback I see to this Pleasure Object. Other than that, you can be completely uninhibited with the ELISE. Isn’t that true, Jack? Why not tell the good people your little secret?”
Jack: “Ok, ok, Stop The Presses! I have an announcement. I broke my ass cherry with the ELISE. There I said it.
I wasn’t actually gonna say that here, because I’m still a little, how shall I put this, sensitive about the whole anal insertion thing. But WTF, right?
I mean I had a ball with this bugger. I’m like totally sold on the prostate massage concept now. But still, years of equating butt-play with gay will take awhile to dissolve.”
Karen: “I am so proud of you for coming out like this, you little butt pirate, you!”
Jack: “Hey now, that’s our little secret.”
Karen: “Yeah, us and all of our readers.”
Jack : “Like I suggested a bit ago, cleanup is easy with just some soap and water; just mind the recharger port. If you’re gonna share this toy, like we did, be sure to thoroughly wipe it down with a lint-free towel wet with peroxide, rubbing alcohol or a 10% bleach solution. Remember, you won’t be able to boil it or pop it in the dishwasher to sterilize.”
See the full review HERE!